Hi friends! Just want to add that I did not include any clips or photos in this video despite wanting too. I have personally been copyright struck by David Dobrik's team in the past and did not want to give anyone on his team ammunition to suppress my video. I am sorry if that makes the video less enjoyable for you guys but I hope the message still gets across. That is also why I heavily censored my words in this video, I don't anticipate that it will be monetized but I would like to do everything I can to not allow it to get pushed down in the algorithm. Love you guys and I will see you in the next one!
We stand by you 👍 It's funny that David used the same old apology that he's done before... The speech about how many vids and pods and other stuff he's done and that he just want to make people happy, so basicly it's just the end that he's changed... 🤮 Dr Grande did a quite funny vid about Davids apology...
Thank you for covering this! Been really waiting for your thoughts on this awful thing.The lack of photos or clips in the video doesn't make it less enjoyable at all! Your videos are so great because of the way you articulate and explain everything.
YES. This. Enthusiastic consent that is freely given, and free of coercion or “negotiation” is the ONLY consent that matters. AND it can be revoked at any time, no questions asked.
The fact of the matter is: The Vlog Squad KNEW Dom had a predatory past and they got girls drunk and practically threw them to a wolf. He literally THANKED DAVID, for creating the scenario. "Master negotiation" is just another way to say "sexual coercion". It was a small gathering CENTERED AROUND getting a predator laid. And not one of those men stood up for the girls and said "Hold up, this isnt right". You ARE the company you keep. If you're not an ally to women, then you're either an enabler/sympathizer towards abuser or you're an abuser.
Exactly. Jeff started his video: “I’m 100% innocent”, but he’s not. Even if he “didn’t” supply the girls with alcohol, he is complicit, just like everyone else.
@@MarialauraVallejo Recently with everything that has been going on, I've come to realize it costs NOTHING to be an ally to women. Men who either make excuses or gaslight about the subject of R word or SA, are enablers/sympathizers towards abusers. If men arent holding other men accountable/protecting women, then they are an enemy too. These are grown adult men who enabled a predator all for the sake of VLOG CONTENT.
@@QuesadillaQueer Yes, plus he was caught in a huge lie saying that he left for the night yet one of the women took a photo with him in it and it was timestamped at about 1 in the morning. Thankfully he wasnt made privy to the info about the pic so he wasnt able to come up with a convincing explanation in the moment and was just dumbfounded by it. Im honestly not inclined to believe what hes saying and EITHER WAY, anyyyy one of them could have said to David "You know what, I dont think its okay to post this. What if this had happened to your sister? Would you want that on the internet for her?". Nobody cared.
I'm just looking at all the likes that this comment got, (me included) thinking, Wow, that could possibly be an accurate number of victims who just looked at this, read it, & who have questioned themselves over & over again about their own trauma. "Did I say yes? Was I to drunk? Idk, cuz I can't remember." It's sad. It's painful. It's something people relive. But, consent is so very important. Please know that. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. Sending love to anyone going through anything surrounding this type of topic. I know that with what has been going on, on the internet lately has been bringing up alot of stuff, especially for me & what happened to me, was years ago. So I can only imagine how others may feel. Keep your heads up! 😊
It was an entire mood & I can't be the only one that was not only OK with it, but actually invigorated by that energy. Righteous indignation is REAL, and we SHOULD be passionate about such vital topics.
What confuses me is that David can edit down an entire day of vlog footage into 4 minutes but can't make an apology longer than 2 minutes to save his life.
@@D3annaLorraine to play devil's advocate, I think he feels like there no words to justify it or to move on from this. He has a PR team telling him while he has his own views and opinions. We have no idea what's going on behind the scenes.
I am by no means diagnosing but my friends used to be big fans of his and I neevr got it because these jokes were in like eevry video but this type of behavior is some serious axis II personality disorders mans got issues where he can joke/not-so-joke about rape pedophilia sexual assault race etc and film him straight bullying people he knows all the while discarding people who no longer praise him or are use to him and when forced by everyone to apologize obviously not mean it and make it last 3 seconds
As a 30 year old woman who's been assaulted, david's vlogs were always highly disturbing. It was like watching abuse on high speed. Sexualisation, misogyny, mindless violence and destruction. No doubt teens could get fooled and I feel like david took advantage of his fans's immaturity.
And it was ALWAYS like that even when DD was considered “cool”. I couldn’t ever wrap my head around how no one talked about it and how any woman or girl could want to hangout with these blokes. That’s why I can’t even feel bad for theses girls. Women have to stop being dormants.
@@marteumar8429 Eh, I don't know if I agree with that framing as it still gives victim blamey vibes towards the women. They were still victims and it's completely understandable why they'd want to meet with youtubers for clout that a lot of people would want and probably would do the same. Still doesn't justify harassment or assault of any kind. 99/100 times it's more complex than simply being doormats.
Omg yes!! Living for the moments where she stops, stares at the camera, and says, “For the people that don’t know what the f@&$ an apology is!” YAS QUEEN! Preach!!
Not even gonna lie, I absolutely LOVE when she's yelling, because it's always about something that's so worth being upset over. I never have the words to fully describe why I think something is wrong, so having her articulate exactly what I feel, and being just as mad, if not more, about it is so cathartic to me omg
it’s so refreshing to hear her be righteously PISSED about this! this entire situation is devastating and they somehow expect ppl to just forgive them and move on. it makes me feel very validated to hear this GETTING to somebody, bc it’s an infuriating situation!! like i’m not crazy, this IS unforgivable!!!!
The most horrifying part of all of this is how his fame has normalized SA to young boys and men. They have literally taught another generation of men that SA is funny. The idea that RUclips is de-monitizing creators who utter the words SA, racism, sexism, or P*d*phe*l** but well protect and reward big creators who actually are engaging in these behaviors is a close second.
I mean Hollywood has been teaching young boys/men that sexual assault is okay and even funny for eons and David and his VS grew up on that sh*t as well. Media played such a big part in creating these standards and environments, it's sickening.
THISSSS ughhhhh I’m just imagining all the young ppl that think SA is not a big deal especially with the rise of the talk of SA on tiktok literally all the young boys on there are totally invalidating womens experiences and even making disgusting rape jokes nonstop under victims comments. youtubers & influencers seriously don’t realize how much of an impact they have smhhh
@@MrPausenbrot absolutely! it’s not only David’s fault but RUclips DEFINITELY played a huge huge role in allowing David to get so many sponsorships and being on the trending page. RUclips is truly fucked up and allowed so many problematic people to influence the youth & RUclips STILL allows disgusting people to post and have fans (like the alt right pipeline type youtubers that literally spews hate speech and normalizes anti Semitic behavior, racism, fatphobia etc. to specifically young boys)
I’ve had an extremely eye-opening talk at my school a few weeks ago. A man who had worked with some sort of s*x crime unit with the police for the majority of his life, came to talk to us about the realities of SA. One thing I’d never actually thought about was that it’s genuinely possible for you to experience something as traumatising as SA and not mentally register it as such. He said often at-least one girl in the audience would excuse herself, as she had only just realised something that happened to her was SA. So it is definitely possible for it to take weeks, months and years to finally come to terms with what you’ve experienced, and to process it enough to speak about it with someone (let alone begin seeking charges).
I said that during the “me too” movement. I said “I’ve never been sexually assaulted. I mean…. I’ve just had a man record me while I was drunk and-….. I’ve been sexually assaulted.”
Literally why is no one else talking about this? I’m happy Hannah was yelling this because this shit eats away at people for years until they understand that their abuse wasn’t their fault
@@laurafergs88RIGHT?! I can't even imagine having that experience with someone so famous for being family-friendly and unproblematic. It's hard enough to understand to understand that your first ten no's meant N.O., but to have the whole world sh!ttng on you for talking about what happened to you and invalidating your experience, and having the abusers and their friends come out with some legal bs and not even feel remorse, it's so sick
TW : SA I was molested when i was a kid, im an adult now and i still cant say who did that to me. The person who did it to me wasnt even famous, can you imagine going agaisnt someone who has millions of fans? It makes me so angry that people accuses the victims of chasing clout when they didnt reveal their names and blaming them for being 'late' to coming out with all these.
Not gonna lie, I saw this coming from a mile away considering how much they behaved like a problematic/r*pey frat house. It was only a matter of time for them to face the consequences.
Wasn't there some scandal years ago that Jason or David had apparently dated a high school girl? I stayed the hell away when I heard about that but I can see how the "nice/generous guy" front tricked lots of people
Yeah, even back in 2017 I was like....why do people, especially children, like them? How are they getting monetized? And as the years went on, WHY IS MSM LIKING DAVID DOBRIK? WHY IS NICKOLODEAN GIVING HIM A SHOW AND AWARDS?
It was COMPLETELY REFRESHING to hear you yell about this topic. This shit is fucking serious and I feel like I’m losing my god damned mind waiting for someone to have an actual real passionate reaction. THANK YOU
RIGHT i know this is considered all ‘petty youtube drama’ but uhm no i’m just glad we can still have some fucking accountability to people who are literally so harmful as influencers. we owe them nothing ffs and these are reflections of bigger issues. the whole point is that it doesn’t just concern them anymore now that they’re publicising it to their HUGE audiences (demographically-wise UNDERAGE PEOPLE)
It sucks that she even felt like she shouldn't be yelling. Like it's not just okay to be emotional about this, it makes WAY more sense than just not being emotional or affected at all because this is really messed up
As someone with a sister who was assaulted by a family member when she was 7 years old I can personally vouch for the whole issue of them coming out with it later. My sister didn’t even accuse my father of anything till she was 16 years old because she couldn’t process it or even remember it before that time. So victims coming out with an accusation later on in life does NOT immediately invalidate the accusation.
I was abused by biological father as a very young child too, we escaped with my stepdad bc he was hurting my mum but I didn’t tell anyone in words what happened to me until I was 19 (we left the day before I turned 7). I literally had to wait til 3 years after he died to be able to do it 🙃 thank you for saying this and being an advocate for your sister and speaking up for so many more who haven’t been able to speak up yet, it’s really meaningful.
I have symptoms of trauma and abuse but no memory of it. And stories like this make me scared to realise someday that I have been abused as a child. I know it is a strange concept. But I do wholeheartedly empathize with people that realize later in life what they have been through, doesn't matter what I end up learning about myself.
I was by a family member when I was around 8-10 years old (multiple times over a period of time) and I never told anything about it until about 5 or 6 years later. And I still don’t tell certain family members about it so I guess not fully coming out.
I feel like some people don't realize the mental gymnastics your brain does to "protect" you from trauma. It can take a long time to fully realize and comprehend what happened to you. I hope 'Hannah' does get justice and at the very least is getting the help she needs.
This. I thought I knew about rape culture and victim blaming, until it happened to me. I was too drunk to sit up on my own and had protested, I had a partner, I wasn’t on birth control, I wasn’t even able to stay upright much less consent. I kept asking to go home. But it happened. I woke up and prayed it was a dream until I saw it wasn’t, and ran to the bathroom. I was crying, but the thought “this wasn’t consensual” was too big to handle. My friend betrayed me, bystanders didn’t help, I was in a home with no transportation and no phone and this person and his friend hadn’t seen any problem in doing this to me. It was easier to tell myself I was a terrible person, I cheated, I did this to myself. It was safer at the time. It took me ages of trying to fight back that realization, but it finally came out. Ever since then I won’t get drunk around people without my trusted friend who watches out for me, and even then I really don’t drink anymore. I can remember how even in my own mind I couldn’t cope with what had happened and resorted to blaming myself to avoid all the consequences and to try to convince myself I didn’t need to feel the pain and shame that was coming up. It was denial to protect my psyche. I can’t believe anyone wants to believe this happened to them, and if it is easier to think they just “agreed and regretted it” that would be so much less painful to believe. But I’ve been with people I regret and this was different. Predators are able to get away with this framing and gaslighting because people don’t understand or value a woman’s consent. Tricking and pressuring and plying women with alcohol is treated like a party game.
Especially in cases where alcohol is involved bc some of that involves a lot of shame before you get to ‘they didn’t have the right to do that just bc I got drunk and couldn’t or didn’t say no’
Exactly! It was only recently that I realized that the people who I had always thought of as good people had actually done these bad things to me, and that I was a victim. After over a year of repressing it and unintentionally justifying it I finally realized it, and even now I'm still having a hard time processing it. It takes a long time to even understand that what happened to you was wrong, let alone speaking up about it, and I never fully understood that until now.
Yes that is so true. I know firsthand what a trauma does to a brain (not like this fortunately) and unless you've been in a situation that's traumatising people never'll completely understand it. It took myself about 6 after everything that has happened to even sort of take a breath and understand what has happened, now almost 7 years later my brain is still figuring things out. I wish everyone strength and love for whatever traumatising moment you are going through. What I do know: it does make you stronger and it will get better.
tbh it's sad but unless you've gone through it yourself i don't think it is something other people can fully comprehend. i am nineteen years old and i am BARELY remembering things that happened to me 10 years ago because my brain suppressed them. only now that i am on therapy and that i am old enough to understand what was being done to me, memories just suddenly come back to me and hit me like a fucking monster truck. i know there's no way people can understand, but they can be emphatetic to survivors and what they went through. believing them is the least we can do
I think Shane and David are a lot more similar than we’d like to admit sometimes. I’m personally ashamed of myself for not really seeing the incredibly internalized misogyny present in these videos. My biggest issue with everything is that there is literal proof that David recorded and people will still defend him. It’s infuriating
Speaking as someone who's always hated David (he just rubbed me the wrong way, I've never watched his stuff), please don't feel ashamed. Maybe you just liked his personality and that's why you might not have noticed things until just recently. That's okay. He's the one who did bad things, not you.
@@bbtdgfan890, exactly. 💗 People are quick to blame themselves and feel guilty for participating. Which is good, because know better, do better. But your level of culpability for being a fan and contributing to this is minute in comparison to David’s. If you then continued to support him after becoming aware of it, that would be sh*tty. But having the wool pulled over your eyes by a sh*tty person, especially if you were young and easily influenced, is nothing to be ashamed of. Last year, my favourite band of twenty years were exposed as being r*cist, bigoted *ssholes and I dropped them like hot potatoes. However, a friend recently shared a Facebook memory from ten years ago of her calling out of the band member’s transphobia. So we knew about some of it for years, and we excused it because we loved them and we loved their music. Even now, they’re currently on The Masked Singer, and I hate myself because on some level, I still enjoyed their performance. So I’m aware that it can be very hard to separate the artist from the art they create no matter how much you disapprove of their actions. And I’m aware it’s a bit different in this sense, since the content itself is problematic, but again...you were young and impressionable and basically being given the message, “This behaviour is okay.” by David and his crew because they were normalising it.
Anyone watching this video and has EVER felt uncomfortable or been taken advantage of by a man, please know this, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. IT HAS NEVER BEEN YOUR FAULT. You are loved and so worthy of love. There are people who believe you and support you. Sending all of the love. Jeff literally said in the live stream “well, they did reply to an Instagram story about a 5 some” I’m very angry about this. Like very very angry about this. He literally victim blamed these girls. Stop blaming the girls and start saying boys shouldn’t r*pe
Yes and then he brought up Trisha’s history of being in a mental hospital for no reason and that she’s acted promiscuously in the past implying she’s not credible or some shit...? like
@@Ebichuchu I’m so angry. I think he is just as guilty as David and needs to be held accountable. If you can defend David and then victim blame, you’re just as much of a piece of shit as the rest of them. I can’t tell you how angry I am that he had the audacity to say that.
@@makeupjunkie0x Completely agree. it’s disgusting and if he truly wasn’t the one who bought the alcohol, but is not revealing the person who did, then he is definitely just as guilty as the rest of them and does not have the best interest of the victims in mind even though he kept swearing up and down he does
@@Ebichuchu I couldn’t agree more. These poor girls. Most girls have gone through SA and can relate with this story and it made me see red when he said that. And then continued to bring up Trisha and the trauma she’s been through. How dare him.
As a girl, hearing this made me more scared than angry because I can’t process how someone could think that. And it’s just terrifying because I can’t imagine how much men and women have that mindset. It’s soo upsetting and I want to cry
You know what I'm tired of? How many women's first or second experience with drinking alcohol ends up being tied in with a dangerous or traumatic experience. This poor woman was under the legal drinking age, probably didn't know her tolerance, and now has to live with the trauma the rest of her life. It makes me sick to think about.
My father (retired criminalist) sat me down when I was 16 and told me that, if I was intrested in drinking alcohol, I could start having half a glass of mead (6%) in dinner. That's because, at least in my country, when we finish secondary school (years 8th to 12th) we go on a trip where we can drink. I started with that and then to beer and wine. He wanted to make sure by the time that trip happened I would know my limit. And that is a terrible situation to be fully aware of as the then child as, I guess, it was for my father.
It's happened to a few friends of mine, and it's horrific beyond measure. To either not know your limits, or have someone drug you, to take advantage is disgusting. There's so many stories along these lines, the fact it isn't an uncommon occurrence is vile.
I personally think you don’t need forgiveness from people. It should more so be about how you change your actions as opposed to whether they forgive you or not
Trisha herself has experienced a lot of this type of trauma in her teenage/young adult life, I think she deserves empathy for leaving. I personally don’t blame her for just leaving and feeling like that’s a situation she can’t stop, especially given her past experiences. Things aren’t always strictly black and white.
Agreed, I don't blame her for what happened. She made it clear she wasn't okay with it, wouldn't let Jason buy the alcohol, and got out of there. Was she supposed to drag the girls out? Lol. Let's keep our focus on the people who were there during, peeked in, and are pictured at the end of the night with the victim being held up.
It's also pretty common to question yourself when you think something is wrong but you have a bunch of people around thinking what's happening is funny. And even harder when you are dating one of them and already got feelings for them.
Watching the frenemies podcast yesterday, Trisha said herself she feels complicit because she didn't do more. She's taking more accountability that any of the others
Can also pls stop holding women accountable for the actions of men? pls like trisha was in a house with 6 men that were co signing that behavior what was she supposed to do? Fight them? Plus those men also psychologically manipulate her and pressure her into doing things she didn't want to do And even without it being her fault she mentioned wishing she did more. Like what else do people want for her?
EDIT: I am happy to say that Jeff is no longer trying to deflect blame away from his friends/David and onto the reporter/Trisha. I have therefore removed my initial clown emoji comment. I also wish him a full and speedy recovery.
Maybe this is just me being an old lady, but how is "having a threesome" ever a normal vlog topic for youtube? Like....I can't fathom thinking that that's an okay concept to film about when your fanbase is primarily younger people. That alone should be a red flag that maybe he shouldn't have a platform
I've wondered this for years because he went to the Kids Choice Awards and has done work with kids TV shows.....it's like do any of those network officials watch his content???
My therapist told me during trauma . Your hippocampus does not compute & store memories correctly. There is certain therapies that can help you “reorganize,” them and put all the pieces together. So Hannah not coming foward for years makes perfect sense.
my brain locked away the memories of my trauma and two years later i still can’t remember a thing. so yes i agree that someone coming forward years after it happened is perfectly valid. they maybe couldn’t remember it, the memories were disorganized or they just were too scared.
Even the simple actions of how they treat their own “friends” who are female. Corinna, their assistants, Trisha, they’re all treated with disrespect. The fact that they seem to think of women as s*x objects is disgusting. Saying they’re “crazy” or just that they like it like that, it’s fcking horrifying.
I dont mean to victim shame in any regard but it also horrifies me that the girls like Corinna and Natalie have so little self respect that they let themselves be treated like that for money and fame.
@@radioactivechihuahua2781 sometimes it's hard to realize something bad is happening. It took me years to even acknowledge what happened to me was sexual assault. It's not always about lacking self respect or in their case, wanting fame and money. Sometimes you just don't notice it
@@radioactivechihuahua2781 I think for me, as a woman, we're taught that "boys will be boys" and men will always behave this way and its up to us to put up with it, because if we don't we're seen as being 'too serious or difficult' and are told that we won't get anywhere with an attitude like that
I do feel bad that these men continuously hharass these women but am I the only one who feels like Natalie is very complicit and even sometimes an accomplice.She doesn't seem all innocent to me
As someone who has been in an abusive relationship; I can totally understand the denial and the gaslighting that comes with going back to an abuser. My ex r*ped me, and despite having been in pain, uncomfortable, fighting back I didn't tell anyone for a long time and played it off because he convinced me that I had wanted it and I believed I didn't fight hard enough to say no. It's difficult for people to understand why a victim goes back, but there's a lot of manipulation of emotions, shame, not wanting to admit you were victimized, and desperate situations like financially that come with that. So when the Seth situation came up I genuinely felt sad cause I could relate. But then the article came out; im livid. I can't image the amount of trauma, if my r*pe was filmed and laughed about and posted as a joke to millions. It's sick. I'm glad I was never a fan of David's; cause it's disgusting he refuses to acknowledge his part is enabling these situations and his blatant disregard of the victims' feelings.
Thank you so much for sharing, I think a lot of people keep brushing Seth’s story to the side bc he returned to his abuser and this is so dangerous bc this happens so much more often than people think. Sending you love ❤️
and this right here is why we should stop idolising people, especially celebrities/influencers. It gets you nowhere and makes it so much harder to hold people accountable. end stan culture
100% people treat influencers like gods that can do no wrong, yet get shocked when they are in fact human like the rest of us and get corrupted by money and power
@@ameliaberthold7375 I know this one woman (mother, late 30s) who would tell me that it was sinful/haram to glamorise things like movies, books and especially celebrities. I never always thought she was exaggerating but after every semi famous person gets caught in appalling situations like these I 100% understand where she is coming from
@@hellolily7722 although i think it’s toxic i think we should keep in mind most stans are kids/teens (9-16) but the adult stans are just WEIRD like ur 20 u should know better
your explanation of a real apology is the reason why you need to be trending. Being shown lately that too many parents haven’t done their jobs in teaching their children to grow into beneficial and healthy members of society as adults. Genuinely disappointed, but grateful for people like you.
Right! These horrific excuses of “apologies” that these influencers give are so shameful and embarrassing. It just shows that they truly aren’t sorry for what they did/said and are only doing it to try and save face.
Absolutely agree! You can't move forward and show change through actions if you don't realize what you did was wrong or why. People aren't obliged to forgive you just because you apologized.
Agreed - I think the reason a lot of these RUclipsrs don't know how to apologize is because many people aren't taught how to just apologize in normal situations. So many people think an apology is "I'm sorry' and "apology accepted" and then we move on, when its so much more than that!
I consistently think about that video of those frat guys chanting, “No mean yes, yes means an*l.” whenever the topic of SA and this type of attitude comes up. God, the next generation HAS to be better and the current generation HAVE to be held accountable for their actions. 🤮
i lowkey feel bad for Corinna... she was friends with david through high school and i just feel like he made her feel like all her worth was in her sexuality and then drilled that in her head
@@alxandro5504 yeah but you can’t conflate wanting David dobrik to be held accountable for the toxicity he’s created and the harm he’s perpetuated with cancel culture, bc it’s not the same instance
Funny how cancel culture only got invented now during the #metoo & #BLM era. Not during the McCarthy communism hearings & blacklisting, or republicans spending a small fortune on dixie chicks albums so they could publically destroy them or Kapernick getting blacklisted from the NFL or ostracizing the entire island of Cuba for being communist. Cancel culture only became a problem once social media started to catch on because it meant wealthy cis white men lost the ability to unilaterally control public discourse. They're not mad because cancelling is wrong or whatever. They're freaking out because they know they could be next. Anyone outraged over cancel culture is just a person nervous at the prospect that they too might someday be held accountable for their own actions.
@@alxandro5504 the only instances of “cancel culture” actually wrongfully canceling someone is Slazo and possibly the ProJared situation. Holding someone accountable for the sh*tty things they do and “canceling” someone are not the same
same i never liked him and i never understood WHY so many ppl did because he seemed like a horrible person and i had the same exact feelings regarding shane dawson and now look at em both... and even now (not to shit on ppl who did watch them before they were exposed) i don't understand how so many of their fans just didn't bother to understand the seriousness behind some of their actions and now they're all saying "im ashamed that i watched him" and i'm like "yeah you should be".
@Queen queen never have empathy for anyone without knowing who they are. it’s was concerning seeing how many people forgave scotty for his absolutely disgusting video defending jason and david, and how people still want to defend dom after what he did to hannah, which is just disgusting. and i totally agree with you, lots of women have internalized misogyny that they don’t realize they have, and they should definitely be educated on it too
I don’t entertain whataboutisms in a debate. I simply reply with, “We’re not talking about that, we’re talking about X.” They usually try again and I just keep bringing it back. “We can discuss that, but first we’re discussing X.” Whataboutism is one of my least favourite logical fallacies. 😒
I had an (emotionally abusive) ex boyfriend who would “whatabout” me ALL the time whenever I tried to address something he did that hurt or upset me. He would always try to deflect by saying, “I only did that because you did this other thing first!”, and I would always respond with, “I hear that you’re upset about X and I definitely want to come back to that, but first I want to finish talking about Y and Z [thing that happened that upset me].” Ultimately it all got me nowhere - he’d keep bringing it back, like you mention above - hence why he is an ex. I wish I could go back in time and tell younger me to tell HIM to fuck off 😞 I wasted so much of my time being manipulated and giving my abusers too many second chances.
@@Tori_with_a_T, unfortunately, it generally takes many crappy life experiences before you get to a point where you can spot that behaviour. *massive hugs* I think the best thing we can do, is talk openly about this stuff so the next generation of women are armed with the confidence and knowledge to avoid it. Actually, I lie. I have two sons who I’m actively teaching about consent from a very early age. Because raising boys who respect consent means they will hopeful grow into men who respect consent. THAT is the most important thing because the solution to r*pe is people not r*ping. I forget where it was, but there was a place in the world where they did an ad campaign targeting men and focusing on consent and how women who are too drunk can’t give it, etc. and cases of SA went down dramatically.
What’s sad to me is that, similar to Hannah, a few years ago I used to love the vlog squad and was also living in the David Dobrik universe. But a part of me also kind of knew that the only woman in the vlog squad who seemed safe from gross sexual jokes and inappropriate behaviour was Liza, which makes sense given she was dating David. I used to fantasize about being a part of their group, but also worried that I’d be treated more like Corinna and Trisha, rather than Liza. And I think that was me knowing deep down that the environment David and his friends created was toxic.
It took me a few years too. Because he was my bf at the time and I felt like that made it normal he wanted to do some things with me. I wasn’t in the mood at all, but I didn’t know I could refuse. So I’m not blaming him, but it’s still happened. I think we need to educate girls and boys that in any type if situation you can always refuse! Girls and boys can both refuse and shouldn’t be shamed for it.
I think a big part of why people often find this type of stuff triggering is because it's often the first time they've ever looked at their own experiences from a more objective, outsider perspective. Seeing people's responses to this story is hard because it's forced me to re-contextualize some of my own experiences when I was hanging out with a friend group ALMOST as toxic as the vlog squad. You've been telling yourself it wasn't a big deal for years, then you see other people being outraged and horrified and realize that all those feelings you repressed and invalidated as being "overly-dramatic" were in fact totally justified the whole time. It's easy to manipulate victims because we're often eager to gaslight ourselves because we'd rather invalidate our experience entirely than have to cope with it directly.
I'm so sorry 😪 What you've experienced was surely AWFUL, but I am glad to hear that you've been able to understand and acknowledge that you were a victim and have gotten to a place where you can start talking about it. That's HUGE! I can relate with you so much. There are things that happened to me as a young child and as a teenager that I really just shoved down and ignored and never spoke of to anyone (including myself) until I was like 24. And even then I thought it was MY fault. It's taken years to finally understand that none of it was my fault, but I'm in my 30s now and I'm still trying to deal with it all emotionally and psychologically. I wish you the best ❤❤
There similarities between the way Shane and David both fooled their audiences into brushing over the serious stuff in their videos is....disturbing, to say the least. Just shows how a façade on the internet really can give you power over what people see and think of you
I can't compare Shane with this guy. He's done the videos with racism that are bad...made jokes about children..but still there was never a rape situation..like a proven one. Not defending Shane..but I do think this other thing is way more serious and so much more that it would be injustice to even compare the two.
Everyone knows a Sexual assault survivor but no one knows a predator... we ignored it & me too/ other important movements are showing society what is SA and what's not. This crew doesn't even realize they SA & R a human being because this behavior is normalized in society. We need to keep covering this story & showing people what consent is
And the sad thing is that when people name their sexual abuser, women will come out of the woodwork to defend the guy, even if they dont know him. You'll see so many women saying the victim is lying for "attention". Who wants attention for such a humiliating experience? No one. But people will defend the guys and blame the victims, so a lot of people dont want to name the abuser. They'll also be more concerned about ruining the guys life and reputation, but they dont consider how the victims life was ruined by the abuse.
It sucks that dom is awful and deserves to be called out but he’s being used as a scapegoat for david and everyone else. David and the rest of them were probably so excited to hear that an article about dom was coming out so they could all divert the attention away from seth and toward the fact that dom is awful and they all chose to distance from him. Dom is being used as a scapegoat
@@chetachi_ We can't say let's support the victims but only the women. We can't be like them. All of the are valid and deserve to be heard and believed.
@@TheBookdragonsCave I’m not saying “only support women” I’m saying I’m skeptical about Seth. If there were credible men accusing David then I’d put them in the mix as well. Also, I don’t agree with the “believe” part. Everyone should be listened to, considered and respected. But we can’t just promote a culture that says “believe” before we’ve been given all of the facts and necessary information. Remember what happened with Amber Heard? I don’t even want to bring up how many peoples lives were ruined because a hate mob decided to blindly “believe” the accuser. The “believe all victims” mantra is a destructive one. Every single person with an accusation should be taken seriously and treated with respect, believability shouldn’t even be part of the discussion.
I love how you brought up the fact that apologies do NOT have to be accepted immediately or ever. People are constantly being gaslit by these influencers supporters whenever they mess up as IF we need to forgive them for being shitty people.
Yeah the supporters would accept their apologies unaware its not them who gets to accept the apology since they arent the victims and they had the audacity to gaslight the actual victims of the problem saying to get over what this influencer did and brings up cancel culture
Thank you also for speaking out about on your Instagram Meghan. It’s absolutely DISGUSTING that he is STILL getting away with this shit. Absolutely ridiculous.
I’m so glad you’re covering this. The whirlwind of gaslighting, throwing each other under the bus, the story changes, it’s all SO much, and I know you can always sum it up really well. Plus I really don’t wanna watch anything they put out on this for fear of giving them any money.
She attended therapy after they broke up. A lot of things she said about attending therapy and why she did was relatable to me, because I also attende therapy after a breakup and came to realise that my ex was manipulative and loved to make me question myself. Liza seemed to have lost and then found herself, hence my suspicion
I think it gave him A LOT of credibility and it is probably why he tried to conceal the breakup for so long. David's manipulative nature and clear lack of empathy recasts their breakup for me. Liza seemed to feel it was totally her fault and the perception at the time was that David was perfect and without fault and would wait for her forever. I wonder how much the audience and Liza were manipulated in that situation as well.
Tbh I used to dislike her for some reason but didn't know why. Later I found out she did make lots of racist jokes with David but I know she doesn't do that anymore. You can search it up on RUclips too if you want
@@zakiatabassum9549 I also disliked her and couldn't pinpoint why. I think because everyone around her called her a "genius" all the time and I genuinely couldn't figure out if they were being serious or making fun of her.
Thank you for speaking about this! I work at a rape crisis center and just under 60% of the clients we see who get rape kits done had voluntarily consumed alcohol and/or drugs at the time of assault. There's this overwhelming cultural attitude that if somebody voluntarily is intoxicated and then is assaulted, the blame is on them or they should've been more careful, and a huge percentage of our clients grapple with guilt themselves wondering if it's 'their own fault'. Minnesota is flirting with legislation rn that basically says if the victim of an assault had voluntarily consumed alcohol/drugs, the assailant can't be charged, which is sickening. It's so important to emphasize that assault is *never* the fault of the victim. I'm glad that people are holding both Dom and David accountable for their roles; I hope that they both can realize how and why what they did was wrong and how much they hurt that girl.
Yeah, I’m not sure why people don’t understand that drinking alcohol means...you drank alcohol. It’s not equivalent to consenting to sex. Also, people love to say, “She shouldn’t have gotten that drunk.” That completely ignores the fact that SOMEONE WHO IS DRUNK CAN’T CONSENT! 🤮 There is one person to blame for SA and one person, only...the r*pist.
I think there’s something to be said about Trisha being labeled as the “crazy ex girlfriend” and the effect it not only had on her but on the things she tried to tell everyone about this group. I can’t imagine being painted in such a light by an entire big ass group of some of the most loved people on the internet (at the time) even indirectly. People are still on their side despite all the proof. I’m just glad that the victims came out and people aren’t attacking and invalidating them anymore
She only exposed them AFTER her heart was broken. If she saw anything before then she kept quiet. She will never be innocent or a victim in my eyes. Never.
@@harleyquin_3 I can see that side of it, I don’t excuse her behavior but emotional manipulation is very real and it seems like this group would have gaslighted her into submission honestly. It seems like people who speak up just get shut out, and someone who has other issues involving past abuse and abandonment can fear this a lot. I also don’t think she knew someone would be sexually assaulted in any capacity. I do not excuse or accept any apologizes for any groups she offended as those are not my apologies to accept. Just a psychological analysis on the situation can give good insight into why people do what they do at the time.
One of the most heartbreaking parts that I heard was that the friend who was with Hannah (that was blacked out) “took over” so Dom would stop having sex .. with an unconscious woman !!!!! Disguised POS. All of them.
As someone who was sexually assaulted and abused for years by my boyfriend at the time, I didn't even acknowledge to MYSELF what was happening to MYSELF until 7 years after the fact. I didn't even intentionally try to realize it, it hit me like a ton of bricks on a 6 hour drive. It is ridiculous that people try to put a timeline on when is appropriate to "accuse" someone. Who can rightfully put a timeline on your emotional and mental processing when you yourself can't even know when that time will come. On a lighter note... I'm at the part of Smokey losing it over how to apologize and I have to say I just adore you Smokey Glow. You're so fired up and I love it
i really think it's time for all of us to 1) evaluate our parasocial relationships with creators 2) consider the culture we create when we attack victims or people who disagree in an attempt to silence them 3) acknowledge that just because we like someone on the internet doesn't mean they're a good person
@@ellayatchi3721 not everyone but most people do 😭 it's the reason, or at least one of the major reasons, why people in the public eye (influencers, celebrities, popular accounts on social media, even politicians to a certain extent) can get away with doing so much. people have this undying loyalty to people they like or believe represents them in someway, which creates an environment in which they can never see these people as having done something wrong or being bad people. with the way stan culture works now in our society, it's likely at an even higher extreme than it ever has been. the worst part is that most people don't even realize that this is what's happening to them. even people that continue to check in with themselves and (try to) make sure they're not becoming dependent on these people that they don't know and who don't know them probably still find themselves occasionally excusing or letting slide smaller things that their faves do even when they probably shouldn't.
@@ellayatchi3721 when they said all of us they weren't implying literally that everybody is blindly following these people, but by saying everybody and not just some people it catches the people who are complicit
When my sister and I were little, we fell into a habit of saying "sorry" and then not changing our behavior because we had mistakenly thought that an apology was all that was needed. In our child minds, saying "sorry" made things fine and nothing needed to change. Our dad noticed this and started responding with "sorry doesn't mean anything," because, at the time, when we said sorry, it DIDN'T mean anything. That's what I keep wanting to say to these apology videos. "Sorry doesn't mean anything."
Same here, my dad used to tell me "i can't do much with your apology" and that's true, sometimes you can't do much with someone else's shallow apology and you need ACTIONS
Growing up my mom made us apologize and say "I'm sorry for doing xyz to you, I won't do it again, please forgive me" and then the other child got to...CHOOSE WHETHER OR NOT TO FORGIVE YOU. Crazy idea I know, but you are not owed forgiveness just because you apologize. Something these people don't realize. Also loved the part where you said "sorry I'm yelling" then came back with a quiet serious tone 😂
Period! My mom told us from young that admitting to what you did wrong, apologizing, DOES NOT MEAN YOU GET TO ESCAPE CONSEQUENCES! Whether that be getting grounded, losing trust, or having a relationship end, you gotta eat that. You did what you did, and you have to accept the consequences period. And the people who you hurt, get to decide what those consequences are
If anyone wants to read the article but cannot pay for it, H3 read the entire article on their podcast titled “Insider article could destroy David’s career”
To emphasize your point in the final part of the video. Not only does trauma make you not want to talk about it or recognize it as traumatic, but also when you do talk about it to those close to you and they INVALIDATE it as "oh you asked for it. Shouldn't have done it. Well that's what you get for being an idiot," it really really does NOT help with the process at all. This happened in my case when I admitted to my mom that a predator groomed me to abuse me. After he was arrested and I told her, she said "no you chose to do so"
Wow I’m so sorry that happened to you 💜 and you’re right. Especially in situations such as this where alcohol is involved with sexual assault, it’s very hard to come forward and say anything because people always seem to blame the victim for choosing to drink.
Speaking from personal experience, I laugh when I'm uncomfortable. A guy who was about a year older than me in school explicitly told me to my face that the first day he met me he had a sexual dream about me later that night. I laughed it off because I didn't know how to respond and what else I could do besides laugh. Karina laughing about Dom putting his hand up her skirt and telling him to stop, she is not laughing because she thought his response was funny, she is laughing to comfort herself because she's uncomfortable and doesn't know what else she can do. David festered this toxic environment where there is no boundaries and anytime someone tries to set them they immediately get demonized for it. There *absolutely* should be repercussions for it.
my only thing is that i do not think that trisha could have predicted what could have happened. she could have also just heard that alcohol was being involved and left. so i see where she's complicit but it is difficult to tell. trisha has also been talking about how problematic they are for years and that deserves some credit too. i was sooo skeptical about her and didn't like her but ever since frenemies you can see how much she tries to grow and invests in working on herself, its commendable. otherwise, this story literally makes me cry and i agree about how crazy it is that time and time again the point is just completely missed when they "address" things
The thing is, say what you want about Trisha ... she pretty much owns what she does wrong, etc etc. She has had and gone through a lot of 💩 and overcome so much. She’s made really bad choices and has seemingly attracted the wrong kind of people and surrounding herself with people who didn’t care about HER. I hope we can continue to see her grow while not losing herself in the process.
I was going to comment something similar. I see where smokeys coming from but according to trisha when David first asked Jason to get alcohol she said no and refused to let him. She recognized that it was a bad situation and left, which I don't think she should be shamed for.
She and Ethan did a fremenies live around the same time as this video went up and Trisha did say that she feels complicit, like she should have done more, and guilt over it, so she can't believe that other people who were there feel nothing and just care about losing sponsors
"It just serves as a bookmark for their fans to reference when defending them" is SUCH a good way of putting it. These cringe non apologies are truly disturbing
One of the contributing factors of Trishas erratic behavior was the extensive gaslighting she experienced attempting to have a committed relationship with Jason. I still question how that came about; did David request Jason to get involved with her for content. And as semi committed relationship began, she started to push back on many of the things the squad was doing that was inappropriate, herself included there was so much toxicity for anyone to handle let alone someone that was desperate to be accepted and loved. There’s so much more to say but it’s been a long day unpacking from so many different directions.
Totally agree. Jason would threaten to dump her if she had a problem with the vlogs, and David and Jason were constantly calling her crazy when she tried to object to things. The clip of her voicing that she didn't want Jason to kiss Seth for the "prank" was a perfect example and it was far from the only time it happened. The gaslighting was in full force. I'm not surprised she removed herself from the situation instead of trying to stop it - David had never listened to her objections before, why would he this time?
The amount of gaslighting I see now that I’m aware of the whole situation rewatching old vlog clips is INSANE. The amount of times they call her crazy, and tell her she shouldn’t be upset over something ANY girl would feel violated by (ie. David sneaking into Jason and Trishas hotel room, hearing them have sex, and then filming her naked afterwards, Jason literally says in his own vlog “trishas pretending to be upset now” and laughs.. WHAT?!) No wonder she’s been as angry as she has been for all these years. I hate that I defended them back when this was all happening.
Not gonna lie Hannah, when you started yelling ‘BANANAS,’ I thought you were gonna pop out of my screen. I was truly afraid. 100 points for getting the message across tho
Your small take on cancel culture is so satisfying for me. I’m sick of people saying the it’s bad and try to act above it, they never consider that creators heart people and never think about the victim and it piss me of so much that the victims get overshadowed so much. Is aways “think about the abusers mental health” and not the victims.
At 4 minutes, you bring up the most important point. He made this evening sound like an awesome experience. Could you imagine that level of gaslighting? That poor girl had so much to dig into to realize she was actually as$@ulted. I hope that makes sense. This story is so incredibly triggering. And I think it’s important to note that this exact event happens to probably every girl you know. It truly is that common.
I have to credit H3H3 for always hearing trisha out about David and pushing about it. Because the author of the insider article even said they only started looking into it because of them.
This is a lot like Shane Dawson. "Shock humor" or "dark humor" is the biggest cover for "We know this is problematic but it's okay because I'm a 'Nice Guy' and look I said sorry so you can't change the past"
I saw this similarity too - however, I don't think David Dobrik has ever really apologized for anything in the past to my limited knowledge so he could never pull the whole "I already apologized for this" line that Shane and Jeffree Star use constantly.
@@user-dt9hfccxdfhhhigf What i find rather annoying is that he hyperfocuses on the stuff that got brought up and called out about he didnt even address even the other content that wasnt talked about and he downplayed his actions to make it sound it was blown out of preportion
theres a non-verbal analysist who looked at the apology and he didnt look up what it was about to try and be unbaised and he was literally like, "I watched this whole damn thing and I dont know what it was about. Tell me in the comments" and even the comments couldnt really agree what he was "apologizing" about
I hope that this man actually now is „cancelled“ and doesn’t just come back in a couple months like nothing ever happened with ppl still supporting him
I was disturbed by the whole vlog squad when one of them started dating a minor as a 24 year old. I am 21 now, which is an even smaller difference but I can not imagine dating an 18 year old. The maturity difference is tremendous. That’s without the economic power imbalance. They all protected and supported him too. :/
Honestly thank you for bringing up that saying "yes" after giving twelve "no"s isn't really consent. I think many people (myself included) were pressured into engaging in activity they weren't ready for/were not enthusiastic about only to blame themselves later for "giving in" to that pressure. When the reality is that no one should pressure you, period. So no one should feel like they're at fault for "giving in" to pressure from the people in their lives or the society in which they live. I hope these victims can find peace and that drawing attention to this can prevent further harm. Thank you for making this video. ❤️
this is so dumb. They are accountable for their own fng actions. STOP blaming everyone else. You do something 11 times it's On them. My god what is wrong with people
When you realize how lucky you are that you were never a fan of this disgusting vile content, manipulative person is like wow glad I was watching laura diy at.13 and smokey glow at 17 because it desensatizes kids to this and high key put them in danger of being in the scenario
I'm so glad I never watched his content. I remember others mentioning him as the dude who gave away cars but my mind was like "ok and?" Like I'm the type of person to question any gifts sent ny way, and now its clear those cars and all that money were bribes to make us think he's a good guy. Charity doesn't always mean morally good.
Same here. I can't prove it..but I have never been a fan. I was a fan of Shane..cause he's more likable IMO. Definitely not defending him..but saying Shane has a very likable side. I don't see a likable side with David. I see someone that only cares about being on top with money and fame. I didn't watch any of his videos till now. Or I should say I tried to watch him before all this one time and I thought he was terrible.
I know this is gonna sound dumb, but you being so passionate about this (or screaming how you say it) is like a breath of fresh air. I was SA and this means a lot to me, it feels like you are giving a voice to all of us. Ily
Trisha Paytas was a victim of sa in her past. I feel like she probably hadn’t dealt with her own trauma yet in order to even realize she needed to help Hannah that night. I don’t excuse it but I know how intense it can be to be in a sa situation and years later be violated again or exposed to it again. It is really hard to know it is unacceptable if that is all you’ve known in your life. The rehabilitation it takes to recognize bad sexual behaviors is heavy and takes years. I think maybe she thought leaving was her way of escaping her own triggers as much as wanting to show she disapproved. Self preservation is strong is all I’m saying. Maybe I’m making sense.
My thoughts exactly. Being a survivor or sa myself. in my younger years I would leave any situation that I closed to that. I wished I acted differently but we don’t alway react the way we wish.
As someone who also went through almost literally the same thing as that girl, I’m 1)so proud of her for coming forward and 2) thankful to her for coming forward, because when you’re assaulted in that way, when alcohol is involved and it doesn’t look like what people think the “typical” sexual assault is, it’s really hard to feel okay talking about it, or feeling like you have the right to say you were assaulted, because you think people will tell you it wasn’t assault. That’s something I’ve really struggled with and seeing people rally behind this girl and tell her her story is valid and she is right to feel violated just makes me feel a lot better about how people around me would treat me if I decided to tell my story.
You are valid, 100%. My really close friend has struggled with her story as well, and unfortunately it seems like so many of us know a survivor with a similar story. I know I don’t know you, but I’m proud of you too. Keep on keeping on.
Even if doing it for David's vlog and David gave go ahead, you don't solicit for something like this. It is serious and way over these immature vlogers head. The girl could have died. Luckily one girl didn't drink so she could drive, or she could have gotten pregnant, lost her virginity to this creep who was not into her or got a disease. Not to mention humiliation etc. This is why they needed to be called out. So other men will think twice. Women are not there for your amusement. Got IT!!!!!!!! and all the members should be ashamed and don't follow orders that are immoral not because you don't want to get caught but because you wouldn't want it done to you, or your sister, mother etc. Do you want to see your sisters or mothers limp body laying there (luckily alive) and have to feel that icky feeling of being someones kicks. and David always doing these videos slept with her mother (addison)
I’m sorry that happened to you. As someone who also has gone through the same thing, this video really hit home as I completely relate. Your pain is valid and what happened to you was horrible and vile and is assault on all regards. I wish you all the best in wherever you are in your process and send my love and prayers.
Have you considered making a podcast? You're so well-spoken and fun to listen to, I'll always leave your videos playing in the background when I'm doing any sort of work/chores and it makes time fly because you know how to keep an audience. Love you and your content so much!
This whole situation is so scary and it's exactly why women feel unsafe, because majority of men don't call out their friends for SH/SA. I don't care if Jeff or Scotty or other "nice guys" have never harrased or assaulted someone, they watched their friends do it and said nothing, and that is just as bad.
The other thing about apologies is that no one is ever owed someone’s forgiveness. You can apologise well, explain why it happened, show growth over time, and STILL the person you hurt is within their rights to not forgive you.
@@maheenm.k1015yeah I do struggle with that. Just because someone apologizes doesn't mean you have to be a "good person" and forgive them. I mean maybe I have forgiven her but I will never forget or trust her, and I most certainly am still mad
I kinda feel lucky because I never watched any of the vlog squad content. I remember hearing other youtubers talk about him as the cool guy who gives away cars and I was like "ok im glad he gives away stuff but like what else is there to him?" And tbh i feel he used charity to divert attention from his sick twisted content. Like how can a guy who gives away teslas be a bad guy? Easy when its a diversion
Even though I am not a big fan of Trisha or Ethan (I just got into the podcast though so this is changing a little), I'm really touched with how hard they're going to make sure the victims (the girls, Seth, etc.) and their stories are heard, despite some comments saying they don't want to hear about the VS situation anymore. David has such a big platform so it's nice to see others with a big platform as well raising awareness on a serious situation that, if Trisha and Ethan hadn't started the conversation, people would have never known about.
@Queen queen Yes! You have a great point there. It's important for men to see that calling out other men for inappropriate behavior (instead of just pretending they don't see it) isn't a "lame" thing to do. From what I have seen thus far, Ethan reminds me of the kind of men where I can feel safe being in a room alone with him.
@@KristinaEspinoza can we also talk about how serious he took the interview with Jeff? Ethan is known for being a terrible interviewer in the past as well as not doing any research for the podcast (despite the podcast having such a large following which is definitely irresponsible) but he did such a great job with the research and questions for Jeff. He definitely put effort into this episode and it shows despite being an emergency episode. I'm so happy about that.
@@Andrea-dm4gd I wasn't aware that Ethan was a terrible interviewer since I've only seen the Frenemies podcast so far and I don't think I've seen any guests featured so far. Makes my respect for him go higher tbh.
14:18 "it is literally just an apology to service as a bookmark, for their fans to reference when defending them. There is no substance." Uhhhm okay poet 🙌
Hanna, I’m a 36 year old man living in Sweden and this video just warms my heart. Strong, vocal women like you are what RUclips and society in general needs. Keep it up! ✊🏽
Let's be honest, DD created a hostile work environment and used the power imbalance to manipulate those around him. He is accountable because this never should have happened. If he were a good human being with empathy and a conscience this would've been prevented.
@Queen queen not only did he film it but he also fosters the environment that enabled it. Let’s be real, those girls were not there for Dom, they were there to meet David and the VlogSquad
Speaking as someone who also suffers from BPD like trisha, I think the biasness you refer to is a symptom we tend to suffer from called "Splitting" it's basically a black and white, all or nothing defence mechanism we have, which usually causes us to think of situations in absolutes. So it can come off as biasness because she doesn't tend to see the nuance when looking back at a situation or person that has traumatised her.
I was hoping I’d see someone else with BPD in the comments saying this. I believe Trisha herself has discussed splitting either on her channel or on the podcast. I feel like sometimes people see us do it and think we’re just bitter or something, rather than understanding that it’s a coping mechanism.
Trisha does not have alters. She faked something so so sensitive. Nobody says anything about it though. She almost single handedly tore down a "community" that already isn't believed by people.
@@laurajames5714 we aren’t talking about Trisha’s false claims of having DID, we’re talking about her having borderline personality disorder from the perspective of people who also have borderline personality disorder. And from what I’ve seen, she is quite regularly and rightfully called out for faking DID.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
Hi friends! Just want to add that I did not include any clips or photos in this video despite wanting too. I have personally been copyright struck by David Dobrik's team in the past and did not want to give anyone on his team ammunition to suppress my video. I am sorry if that makes the video less enjoyable for you guys but I hope the message still gets across. That is also why I heavily censored my words in this video, I don't anticipate that it will be monetized but I would like to do everything I can to not allow it to get pushed down in the algorithm. Love you guys and I will see you in the next one!
Well here's a comment to help with the algorithm 😉 💖
comment to help the algorithm
Jeff being grilled on Frenemies is.... interesting ...!!!
We stand by you 👍 It's funny that David used the same old apology that he's done before... The speech about how many vids and pods and other stuff he's done and that he just want to make people happy, so basicly it's just the end that he's changed... 🤮
Dr Grande did a quite funny vid about Davids apology...
Thank you for covering this! Been really waiting for your thoughts on this awful thing.The lack of photos or clips in the video doesn't make it less enjoyable at all! Your videos are so great because of the way you articulate and explain everything.
“If you have to negotiate with someone to have sex with them, that is not consent.” THANK YOU
YES. This. Enthusiastic consent that is freely given, and free of coercion or “negotiation” is the ONLY consent that matters. AND it can be revoked at any time, no questions asked.
F*ck yeah, louder for the people in the back!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
@@jenevarider3316 absolutely!! if it's not a "fuck yeah!" it's a no
That's mostly true.
My ex-husband would probably disagree.
@@moiraeiynck2098 its completely true. If your ex husband disagrees, he's a shit person and its good he is your ex
The fact of the matter is: The Vlog Squad KNEW Dom had a predatory past and they got girls drunk and practically threw them to a wolf. He literally THANKED DAVID, for creating the scenario. "Master negotiation" is just another way to say "sexual coercion". It was a small gathering CENTERED AROUND getting a predator laid. And not one of those men stood up for the girls and said "Hold up, this isnt right". You ARE the company you keep. If you're not an ally to women, then you're either an enabler/sympathizer towards abuser or you're an abuser.
Couldn't have said it better
Exactly. Jeff started his video: “I’m 100% innocent”, but he’s not. Even if he “didn’t” supply the girls with alcohol, he is complicit, just like everyone else.
@@MarialauraVallejo Recently with everything that has been going on, I've come to realize it costs NOTHING to be an ally to women. Men who either make excuses or gaslight about the subject of R word or SA, are enablers/sympathizers towards abusers. If men arent holding other men accountable/protecting women, then they are an enemy too. These are grown adult men who enabled a predator all for the sake of VLOG CONTENT.
@@QuesadillaQueer Yes, plus he was caught in a huge lie saying that he left for the night yet one of the women took a photo with him in it and it was timestamped at about 1 in the morning. Thankfully he wasnt made privy to the info about the pic so he wasnt able to come up with a convincing explanation in the moment and was just dumbfounded by it. Im honestly not inclined to believe what hes saying and EITHER WAY, anyyyy one of them could have said to David "You know what, I dont think its okay to post this. What if this had happened to your sister? Would you want that on the internet for her?". Nobody cared.
He doesn't do anything with Dom anymore. Move on already, Jeeze
Consent is so much more than just saying no. Being drunk, drugged, unconscious, restrained, pressured, harassed etc. are still not consent, either.
The only "yes" is an ENTHUSIASTIC "yes." Someone saying "uhhhh... ok sure" is NOT consent.
@@MrXiaoqiao Exactly!
I'm just looking at all the likes that this comment got, (me included) thinking, Wow, that could possibly be an accurate number of victims who just looked at this, read it, & who have questioned themselves over & over again about their own trauma. "Did I say yes? Was I to drunk? Idk, cuz I can't remember." It's sad. It's painful. It's something people relive. But, consent is so very important. Please know that. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. Sending love to anyone going through anything surrounding this type of topic. I know that with what has been going on, on the internet lately has been bringing up alot of stuff, especially for me & what happened to me, was years ago. So I can only imagine how others may feel. Keep your heads up! 😊
@@MrXiaoqiao yes! also do you watch a show called one day at a time?
@@adrianaulloa4770 I haven’t! I’ll check it out!
I feel that you yelling in this one is entirely appropriate
I agree! Showing emotion in these situations shouldn’t be frowned upon or twisted into some weird interpretation
In solidarity we will all yell at our screens
For real, when it comes to assault at the hands of men we have every right to scream
It was an entire mood & I can't be the only one that was not only OK with it, but actually invigorated by that energy. Righteous indignation is REAL, and we SHOULD be passionate about such vital topics.
Also, WOW, I wish I could yell so quickly and eloquently. Really gets the job done.
What confuses me is that David can edit down an entire day of vlog footage into 4 minutes but can't make an apology longer than 2 minutes to save his life.
That’s because he does not actually give a shit about anyone or anything besides himself and his money.
@@D3annaLorraine is a p
@@D3annaLorraine to play devil's advocate, I think he feels like there no words to justify it or to move on from this. He has a PR team telling him while he has his own views and opinions. We have no idea what's going on behind the scenes.
I am by no means diagnosing but my friends used to be big fans of his and I neevr got it because these jokes were in like eevry video but this type of behavior is some serious axis II personality disorders mans got issues where he can joke/not-so-joke about rape pedophilia sexual assault race etc and film him straight bullying people he knows all the while discarding people who no longer praise him or are use to him and when forced by everyone to apologize obviously not mean it and make it last 3 seconds
@@kat6500 because you have no sense of humer
As a 30 year old woman who's been assaulted, david's vlogs were always highly disturbing. It was like watching abuse on high speed. Sexualisation, misogyny, mindless violence and destruction. No doubt teens could get fooled and I feel like david took advantage of his fans's immaturity.
And it was ALWAYS like that even when DD was considered “cool”. I couldn’t ever wrap my head around how no one talked about it and how any woman or girl could want to hangout with these blokes.
That’s why I can’t even feel bad for theses girls. Women have to stop being dormants.
Yea no. Those girls were in no way responsible for their SA. Being so drunk you can’t even stand up isn’t being a doormat. This comment is gross.
Frat house vibes
@@marteumar8429 Eh, I don't know if I agree with that framing as it still gives victim blamey vibes towards the women. They were still victims and it's completely understandable why they'd want to meet with youtubers for clout that a lot of people would want and probably would do the same. Still doesn't justify harassment or assault of any kind. 99/100 times it's more complex than simply being doormats.
Who else would be perfectly okay with a video where Hannah yells over something that is definitely worth yelling about?
Omg yes!! Living for the moments where she stops, stares at the camera, and says, “For the people that don’t know what the f@&$ an apology is!” YAS QUEEN! Preach!!
I love her energy
Not even gonna lie, I absolutely LOVE when she's yelling, because it's always about something that's so worth being upset over. I never have the words to fully describe why I think something is wrong, so having her articulate exactly what I feel, and being just as mad, if not more, about it is so cathartic to me omg
For a second I thought you were talking about the victim "Hannah" and I was like "Hell yeah she deserves to yell!" and then I realized lol
it’s so refreshing to hear her be righteously PISSED about this! this entire situation is devastating and they somehow expect ppl to just forgive them and move on. it makes me feel very validated to hear this GETTING to somebody, bc it’s an infuriating situation!! like i’m not crazy, this IS unforgivable!!!!
The most horrifying part of all of this is how his fame has normalized SA to young boys and men. They have literally taught another generation of men that SA is funny. The idea that RUclips is de-monitizing creators who utter the words SA, racism, sexism, or P*d*phe*l** but well protect and reward big creators who actually are engaging in these behaviors is a close second.
Absolutely this!! Makes you wonder what goes on behind the scenes of these big companies..
I mean Hollywood has been teaching young boys/men that sexual assault is okay and even funny for eons and David and his VS grew up on that sh*t as well. Media played such a big part in creating these standards and environments, it's sickening.
THISSSS ughhhhh I’m just imagining all the young ppl that think SA is not a big deal especially with the rise of the talk of SA on tiktok literally all the young boys on there are totally invalidating womens experiences and even making disgusting rape jokes nonstop under victims comments. youtubers & influencers seriously don’t realize how much of an impact they have smhhh
@@MrPausenbrot absolutely! it’s not only David’s fault but RUclips DEFINITELY played a huge huge role in allowing David to get so many sponsorships and being on the trending page. RUclips is truly fucked up and allowed so many problematic people to influence the youth & RUclips STILL allows disgusting people to post and have fans (like the alt right pipeline type youtubers that literally spews hate speech and normalizes anti Semitic behavior, racism, fatphobia etc. to specifically young boys)
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I’ve had an extremely eye-opening talk at my school a few weeks ago. A man who had worked with some sort of s*x crime unit with the police for the majority of his life, came to talk to us about the realities of SA. One thing I’d never actually thought about was that it’s genuinely possible for you to experience something as traumatising as SA and not mentally register it as such. He said often at-least one girl in the audience would excuse herself, as she had only just realised something that happened to her was SA. So it is definitely possible for it to take weeks, months and years to finally come to terms with what you’ve experienced, and to process it enough to speak about it with someone (let alone begin seeking charges).
For me, it took over 10 years to even realize.
I was roughly 6 years old so I didn't realize till about 14 and I was confuses at 8 why I was scared of him
About 18 years or so, for me. My brain played keep away with certain memories in very creative ways.
Took me about 5 years. Denial is the mind trying to protect itself and its a powerful thing.
I said that during the “me too” movement. I said “I’ve never been sexually assaulted. I mean…. I’ve just had a man record me while I was drunk and-….. I’ve been sexually assaulted.”
“Saying yes after pressure or after asking 11 times is not consent,” Girl preach!!!! 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Forced consent isn’t consent!
Literally! These dudes are pathetic
Literally why is no one else talking about this? I’m happy Hannah was yelling this because this shit eats away at people for years until they understand that their abuse wasn’t their fault
@@alexisaschkenase5030 100%! No one is allowed to touch you unless you’re enthusiastically into the idea!
@@laurafergs88RIGHT?! I can't even imagine having that experience with someone so famous for being family-friendly and unproblematic. It's hard enough to understand to understand that your first ten no's meant N.O., but to have the whole world sh!ttng on you for talking about what happened to you and invalidating your experience, and having the abusers and their friends come out with some legal bs and not even feel remorse, it's so sick
TW : SA
I was molested when i was a kid, im an adult now and i still cant say who did that to me. The person who did it to me wasnt even famous, can you imagine going agaisnt someone who has millions of fans? It makes me so angry that people accuses the victims of chasing clout when they didnt reveal their names and blaming them for being 'late' to coming out with all these.
I’m sorry that happened to you ❤️ thank you for sharing your story and I hope you have been able to heal.
Yes 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️
I’m so sorry that happened to you. I hope you’re doing better now. Thanks for sharing ❤️
Fellow csa survivor here, sending you my love. We're strong we'll be okay.
@@iwbee thankyou, sending you my love as well
I am WHEEZING at RUclips trending the apology he was trying to hide. Someone at the RUclips headquarters was like, "Oops...my bad."
It’s the algorithm. Automatically set to push his content
Dom committed the act. David sat, edited the video, saw the text that the girl sent to Dom, and still did nothing... for years.
It’s evil.
I totally agree. He created a situation for these girls to get hurt. That is as much a crime as what Dom did.
Not gonna lie, I saw this coming from a mile away considering how much they behaved like a problematic/r*pey frat house. It was only a matter of time for them to face the consequences.
Yeah always got that vibe from them can't believe they were seen as *wholesome
Yeah I never watched him bc I always got frat guy vibes. I am not surprised at all
All the warning signs were there & people defended them for soo long because David was “likable.” People need to do better as an audience !
Wasn't there some scandal years ago that Jason or David had apparently dated a high school girl? I stayed the hell away when I heard about that but I can see how the "nice/generous guy" front tricked lots of people
Yeah, even back in 2017 I was like....why do people, especially children, like them? How are they getting monetized? And as the years went on, WHY IS MSM LIKING DAVID DOBRIK? WHY IS NICKOLODEAN GIVING HIM A SHOW AND AWARDS?
It was COMPLETELY REFRESHING to hear you yell about this topic. This shit is fucking serious and I feel like I’m losing my god damned mind waiting for someone to have an actual real passionate reaction. THANK YOU
RIGHT i know this is considered all ‘petty youtube drama’ but uhm no i’m just glad we can still have some fucking accountability to people who are literally so harmful as influencers. we owe them nothing ffs and these are reflections of bigger issues. the whole point is that it doesn’t just concern them anymore now that they’re publicising it to their HUGE audiences (demographically-wise UNDERAGE PEOPLE)
It sucks that she even felt like she shouldn't be yelling. Like it's not just okay to be emotional about this, it makes WAY more sense than just not being emotional or affected at all because this is really messed up
I agree so much. I end up feeling so ???!!
As someone with a sister who was assaulted by a family member when she was 7 years old I can personally vouch for the whole issue of them coming out with it later. My sister didn’t even accuse my father of anything till she was 16 years old because she couldn’t process it or even remember it before that time. So victims coming out with an accusation later on in life does NOT immediately invalidate the accusation.
I was abused by biological father as a very young child too, we escaped with my stepdad bc he was hurting my mum but I didn’t tell anyone in words what happened to me until I was 19 (we left the day before I turned 7). I literally had to wait til 3 years after he died to be able to do it 🙃 thank you for saying this and being an advocate for your sister and speaking up for so many more who haven’t been able to speak up yet, it’s really meaningful.
My aunt was a her 50s, and her abusers died 30 and 20 years prior before, after years of therapy, she was able to remember.
I have symptoms of trauma and abuse but no memory of it. And stories like this make me scared to realise someday that I have been abused as a child. I know it is a strange concept.
But I do wholeheartedly empathize with people that realize later in life what they have been through, doesn't matter what I end up learning about myself.
I was by a family member when I was around 8-10 years old (multiple times over a period of time) and I never told anything about it until about 5 or 6 years later. And I still don’t tell certain family members about it so I guess not fully coming out.
100%
I feel like some people don't realize the mental gymnastics your brain does to "protect" you from trauma. It can take a long time to fully realize and comprehend what happened to you. I hope 'Hannah' does get justice and at the very least is getting the help she needs.
This. I thought I knew about rape culture and victim blaming, until it happened to me. I was too drunk to sit up on my own and had protested, I had a partner, I wasn’t on birth control, I wasn’t even able to stay upright much less consent. I kept asking to go home. But it happened. I woke up and prayed it was a dream until I saw it wasn’t, and ran to the bathroom. I was crying, but the thought “this wasn’t consensual” was too big to handle. My friend betrayed me, bystanders didn’t help, I was in a home with no transportation and no phone and this person and his friend hadn’t seen any problem in doing this to me. It was easier to tell myself I was a terrible person, I cheated, I did this to myself. It was safer at the time. It took me ages of trying to fight back that realization, but it finally came out. Ever since then I won’t get drunk around people without my trusted friend who watches out for me, and even then I really don’t drink anymore. I can remember how even in my own mind I couldn’t cope with what had happened and resorted to blaming myself to avoid all the consequences and to try to convince myself I didn’t need to feel the pain and shame that was coming up. It was denial to protect my psyche. I can’t believe anyone wants to believe this happened to them, and if it is easier to think they just “agreed and regretted it” that would be so much less painful to believe. But I’ve been with people I regret and this was different. Predators are able to get away with this framing and gaslighting because people don’t understand or value a woman’s consent. Tricking and pressuring and plying women with alcohol is treated like a party game.
Especially in cases where alcohol is involved bc some of that involves a lot of shame before you get to ‘they didn’t have the right to do that just bc I got drunk and couldn’t or didn’t say no’
Exactly! It was only recently that I realized that the people who I had always thought of as good people had actually done these bad things to me, and that I was a victim. After over a year of repressing it and unintentionally justifying it I finally realized it, and even now I'm still having a hard time processing it. It takes a long time to even understand that what happened to you was wrong, let alone speaking up about it, and I never fully understood that until now.
Yes that is so true. I know firsthand what a trauma does to a brain (not like this fortunately) and unless you've been in a situation that's traumatising people never'll completely understand it. It took myself about 6 after everything that has happened to even sort of take a breath and understand what has happened, now almost 7 years later my brain is still figuring things out. I wish everyone strength and love for whatever traumatising moment you are going through. What I do know: it does make you stronger and it will get better.
tbh it's sad but unless you've gone through it yourself i don't think it is something other people can fully comprehend. i am nineteen years old and i am BARELY remembering things that happened to me 10 years ago because my brain suppressed them. only now that i am on therapy and that i am old enough to understand what was being done to me, memories just suddenly come back to me and hit me like a fucking monster truck. i know there's no way people can understand, but they can be emphatetic to survivors and what they went through. believing them is the least we can do
i learned this in my health class and i’ve never forgotten it, “no means no, it doesn’t mean convince me”
Or: the only "yes" is an ENTHUSIASTIC "yes."
I think Shane and David are a lot more similar than we’d like to admit sometimes. I’m personally ashamed of myself for not really seeing the incredibly internalized misogyny present in these videos.
My biggest issue with everything is that there is literal proof that David recorded and people will still defend him. It’s infuriating
I’m so ashamed of myself for being fans of both of them when I was younger, it makes me sick tbh.
it’s not internalised misogyny it’s just blantant misogyny. Internalised misogyny more applies to women who are misogynistic
The way we bend over backwards to excuse the behavior of mediocre white men is disappointing, to say the least 😪
Speaking as someone who's always hated David (he just rubbed me the wrong way, I've never watched his stuff), please don't feel ashamed. Maybe you just liked his personality and that's why you might not have noticed things until just recently. That's okay. He's the one who did bad things, not you.
@@bbtdgfan890, exactly. 💗
People are quick to blame themselves and feel guilty for participating. Which is good, because know better, do better. But your level of culpability for being a fan and contributing to this is minute in comparison to David’s.
If you then continued to support him after becoming aware of it, that would be sh*tty. But having the wool pulled over your eyes by a sh*tty person, especially if you were young and easily influenced, is nothing to be ashamed of.
Last year, my favourite band of twenty years were exposed as being r*cist, bigoted *ssholes and I dropped them like hot potatoes. However, a friend recently shared a Facebook memory from ten years ago of her calling out of the band member’s transphobia.
So we knew about some of it for years, and we excused it because we loved them and we loved their music. Even now, they’re currently on The Masked Singer, and I hate myself because on some level, I still enjoyed their performance. So I’m aware that it can be very hard to separate the artist from the art they create no matter how much you disapprove of their actions.
And I’m aware it’s a bit different in this sense, since the content itself is problematic, but again...you were young and impressionable and basically being given the message, “This behaviour is okay.” by David and his crew because they were normalising it.
Anyone watching this video and has EVER felt uncomfortable or been taken advantage of by a man, please know this, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. IT HAS NEVER BEEN YOUR FAULT. You are loved and so worthy of love. There are people who believe you and support you. Sending all of the love.
Jeff literally said in the live stream “well, they did reply to an Instagram story about a 5 some” I’m very angry about this. Like very very angry about this. He literally victim blamed these girls. Stop blaming the girls and start saying boys shouldn’t r*pe
Yes and then he brought up Trisha’s history of being in a mental hospital for no reason and that she’s acted promiscuously in the past implying she’s not credible or some shit...? like
@@Ebichuchu I’m so angry. I think he is just as guilty as David and needs to be held accountable. If you can defend David and then victim blame, you’re just as much of a piece of shit as the rest of them. I can’t tell you how angry I am that he had the audacity to say that.
@@makeupjunkie0x Completely agree. it’s disgusting and if he truly wasn’t the one who bought the alcohol, but is not revealing the person who did, then he is definitely just as guilty as the rest of them and does not have the best interest of the victims in mind even though he kept swearing up and down he does
@@Ebichuchu I couldn’t agree more. These poor girls. Most girls have gone through SA and can relate with this story and it made me see red when he said that. And then continued to bring up Trisha and the trauma she’s been through. How dare him.
As a girl, hearing this made me more scared than angry because I can’t process how someone could think that. And it’s just terrifying because I can’t imagine how much men and women have that mindset. It’s soo upsetting and I want to cry
I can’t wait for d’angelo Wallace to do like a 2 hr documentary on this
YEAHHH
I HOPE HE DOEEES
Yessss
THANK GOD I WASN’T THE ONLY WHO THINKS THIS. YES YES YES
Dream date!
You know what I'm tired of? How many women's first or second experience with drinking alcohol ends up being tied in with a dangerous or traumatic experience. This poor woman was under the legal drinking age, probably didn't know her tolerance, and now has to live with the trauma the rest of her life. It makes me sick to think about.
Yes the fact they gave them hard liquor of all things even speaks volumes of their intentions
My father (retired criminalist) sat me down when I was 16 and told me that, if I was intrested in drinking alcohol, I could start having half a glass of mead (6%) in dinner. That's because, at least in my country, when we finish secondary school (years 8th to 12th) we go on a trip where we can drink.
I started with that and then to beer and wine. He wanted to make sure by the time that trip happened I would know my limit. And that is a terrible situation to be fully aware of as the then child as, I guess, it was for my father.
It's happened to a few friends of mine, and it's horrific beyond measure. To either not know your limits, or have someone drug you, to take advantage is disgusting. There's so many stories along these lines, the fact it isn't an uncommon occurrence is vile.
okay “hannah” wasn’t underage as in a minor
@@alxandro5504 What difference does that make?
like my parents told me ‘sorry is just the beginning to apologizing, you have to wait for them to forgive you’
that is amazing advice. life changing. thank you for sharing!!! ♥️
Love this and will be using it with my own kids, along with one of my other favorites, "changed behavior is the best apology"
Love it
I personally think you don’t need forgiveness from people. It should more so be about how you change your actions as opposed to whether they forgive you or not
Beautiful message. Great life lesson for your parents to teach.
Phil DeFeanco once said, “anything less than a yes is a no” I love that
Trisha herself has experienced a lot of this type of trauma in her teenage/young adult life, I think she deserves empathy for leaving. I personally don’t blame her for just leaving and feeling like that’s a situation she can’t stop, especially given her past experiences. Things aren’t always strictly black and white.
Agreed, I don't blame her for what happened. She made it clear she wasn't okay with it, wouldn't let Jason buy the alcohol, and got out of there. Was she supposed to drag the girls out? Lol. Let's keep our focus on the people who were there during, peeked in, and are pictured at the end of the night with the victim being held up.
Sometimes people have a flight or fight response. She might have recognized the situation and it made her go into flight mode.
It's also pretty common to question yourself when you think something is wrong but you have a bunch of people around thinking what's happening is funny. And even harder when you are dating one of them and already got feelings for them.
Watching the frenemies podcast yesterday, Trisha said herself she feels complicit because she didn't do more. She's taking more accountability that any of the others
Can also pls stop holding women accountable for the actions of men? pls like trisha was in a house with 6 men that were co signing that behavior what was she supposed to do? Fight them? Plus those men also psychologically manipulate her and pressure her into doing things she didn't want to do And even without it being her fault she mentioned wishing she did more. Like what else do people want for her?
EDIT:
I am happy to say that Jeff is no longer trying to deflect blame away from his friends/David and onto the reporter/Trisha.
I have therefore removed my initial clown emoji comment.
I also wish him a full and speedy recovery.
*circus music intensifies*
*Smell of white face paint intensifies*
jeff didnt read ANY of the article omg
lacking brain cells for SURE
How do you respond to something you never read I -
“IT IS BANANAS TO ME...im sorry im screaming...*less intense* it is bananas to me* AHHH IM DYING
i literally loled at this part 😅
Maybe this is just me being an old lady, but how is "having a threesome" ever a normal vlog topic for youtube? Like....I can't fathom thinking that that's an okay concept to film about when your fanbase is primarily younger people. That alone should be a red flag that maybe he shouldn't have a platform
I've wondered this for years because he went to the Kids Choice Awards and has done work with kids TV shows.....it's like do any of those network officials watch his content???
His whole content is a red flag
Because people, these "fans" would prefer to ignore their instinct for the purposes of being entertained. Eejits!
Yes, that is what I was thinking as well...
It’s not I’m 19 years old and it’s not content it’s exploitation
Hannah: “IT IS BANANAS TO ME”
Also Hannah: “𝑖𝑡 𝑖𝑠 ✨𝑏𝑎𝑛𝑎𝑛𝑎𝑠✨ 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒“
My therapist told me during trauma . Your hippocampus does not compute & store memories correctly. There is certain therapies that can help you “reorganize,” them and put all the pieces together. So Hannah not coming foward for years makes perfect sense.
And I know Smokey Glow pretty much says this but I just wanted to say it in a bit more scientific way.
@@sarahkrajenta3952 it took me 10 years to realize I was assaulted!
my brain locked away the memories of my trauma and two years later i still can’t remember a thing. so yes i agree that someone coming forward years after it happened is perfectly valid. they maybe couldn’t remember it, the memories were disorganized or they just were too scared.
Yeah, it took me 3-4 years to realise that I was assaulted.
Yes this is so important, it took me 8 months to realize a guy I used to be with sexually assaulted me multiple times.
Even the simple actions of how they treat their own “friends” who are female. Corinna, their assistants, Trisha, they’re all treated with disrespect. The fact that they seem to think of women as s*x objects is disgusting. Saying they’re “crazy” or just that they like it like that, it’s fcking horrifying.
I dont mean to victim shame in any regard but it also horrifies me that the girls like Corinna and Natalie have so little self respect that they let themselves be treated like that for money and fame.
@@radioactivechihuahua2781 sometimes it's hard to realize something bad is happening. It took me years to even acknowledge what happened to me was sexual assault. It's not always about lacking self respect or in their case, wanting fame and money. Sometimes you just don't notice it
@@radioactivechihuahua2781 I think for me, as a woman, we're taught that "boys will be boys" and men will always behave this way and its up to us to put up with it, because if we don't we're seen as being 'too serious or difficult' and are told that we won't get anywhere with an attitude like that
I do feel bad that these men continuously hharass these women but am I the only one who feels like Natalie is very complicit and even sometimes an accomplice.She doesn't seem all innocent to me
@@Chloe-ik9cr we need to girlcott against since we know better now sending love
As someone who has been in an abusive relationship; I can totally understand the denial and the gaslighting that comes with going back to an abuser. My ex r*ped me, and despite having been in pain, uncomfortable, fighting back I didn't tell anyone for a long time and played it off because he convinced me that I had wanted it and I believed I didn't fight hard enough to say no. It's difficult for people to understand why a victim goes back, but there's a lot of manipulation of emotions, shame, not wanting to admit you were victimized, and desperate situations like financially that come with that. So when the Seth situation came up I genuinely felt sad cause I could relate. But then the article came out; im livid. I can't image the amount of trauma, if my r*pe was filmed and laughed about and posted as a joke to millions. It's sick. I'm glad I was never a fan of David's; cause it's disgusting he refuses to acknowledge his part is enabling these situations and his blatant disregard of the victims' feelings.
Thank you so much for sharing, I think a lot of people keep brushing Seth’s story to the side bc he returned to his abuser and this is so dangerous bc this happens so much more often than people think. Sending you love ❤️
“Saying yes after being pressured is not consent.” Thank you 🥺
It was such a hard thing to hear😞
I can't get over David's creepy smile and laugh when he says the girls were "convinced" after "master negotiation".
The world would be a safer place if more people understood this!
Ugh. I hate thinking about all the times I said yes due to pressure...smfh
I have never thought of this and that statement could be life-changing for some people
and this right here is why we should stop idolising people, especially celebrities/influencers. It gets you nowhere and makes it so much harder to hold people accountable. end stan culture
100% people treat influencers like gods that can do no wrong, yet get shocked when they are in fact human like the rest of us and get corrupted by money and power
@@ameliaberthold7375 I know this one woman (mother, late 30s) who would tell me that it was sinful/haram to glamorise things like movies, books and especially celebrities. I never always thought she was exaggerating but after every semi famous person gets caught in appalling situations like these I 100% understand where she is coming from
i'm so done with stan culture and people justifying it. there's nothing okay about worshipping a human being, sorry.
@@hellolily7722 although i think it’s toxic i think we should keep in mind most stans are kids/teens (9-16) but the adult stans are just WEIRD like ur 20 u should know better
As a kid that grown up on nickelodeon I feel so uncomfortable that nickelodeon hasn’t dropped David or the gang
i mean. look at what they did to Jennette McCurdy, aiding and protecting Dan Schneider. exs dont give a shit
Nickoledon top staff is the David's of the world.
Do brick is on Nickelodeon?
your explanation of a real apology is the reason why you need to be trending. Being shown lately that too many parents haven’t done their jobs in teaching their children to grow into beneficial and healthy members of society as adults. Genuinely disappointed, but grateful for people like you.
Riiiiiiight that needs to be clipped and trended to the max
I completely agree.
Right! These horrific excuses of “apologies” that these influencers give are so shameful and embarrassing. It just shows that they truly aren’t sorry for what they did/said and are only doing it to try and save face.
Absolutely agree! You can't move forward and show change through actions if you don't realize what you did was wrong or why. People aren't obliged to forgive you just because you apologized.
Agreed - I think the reason a lot of these RUclipsrs don't know how to apologize is because many people aren't taught how to just apologize in normal situations. So many people think an apology is "I'm sorry' and "apology accepted" and then we move on, when its so much more than that!
Ive been waiting for this one....TURN IT UP FOR THE FRAT BOYS IN THE BACK
I was JUST about to comment this 😅😂
@@hannahstolzer2085 ME TOO
YAAAASSSSSS!!!!
I consistently think about that video of those frat guys chanting, “No mean yes, yes means an*l.” whenever the topic of SA and this type of attitude comes up.
God, the next generation HAS to be better and the current generation HAVE to be held accountable for their actions. 🤮
I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY THIS
i lowkey feel bad for Corinna... she was friends with david through high school and i just feel like he made her feel like all her worth was in her sexuality and then drilled that in her head
I agree, but it probably wasn’t just David that did this to her. It’s probably been most of the men in her life including her father.
Poor baby was groomed😞
I swear if I hear cancel culture being used as a misnomer for being held accountable I’m going to lose it
cancel culture is toxic and shouldn’t exist
@@alxandro5504 yeah but you can’t conflate wanting David dobrik to be held accountable for the toxicity he’s created and the harm he’s perpetuated with cancel culture, bc it’s not the same instance
@@V1ckyK4r1 people are trying to get away with anything they can without being responsible. It’s terrible
Funny how cancel culture only got invented now during the #metoo & #BLM era. Not during the McCarthy communism hearings & blacklisting, or republicans spending a small fortune on dixie chicks albums so they could publically destroy them or Kapernick getting blacklisted from the NFL or ostracizing the entire island of Cuba for being communist. Cancel culture only became a problem once social media started to catch on because it meant wealthy cis white men lost the ability to unilaterally control public discourse. They're not mad because cancelling is wrong or whatever. They're freaking out because they know they could be next.
Anyone outraged over cancel culture is just a person nervous at the prospect that they too might someday be held accountable for their own actions.
@@alxandro5504 the only instances of “cancel culture” actually wrongfully canceling someone is Slazo and possibly the ProJared situation. Holding someone accountable for the sh*tty things they do and “canceling” someone are not the same
My biggest flex is I never watched any of his videos. But honestly I wouldn’t mind a video of you yelling at him lmao.
Same I didn’t even really know who he was until all of this 🤭
same i never liked him and i never understood WHY so many ppl did because he seemed like a horrible person and i had the same exact feelings regarding shane dawson and now look at em both... and even now (not to shit on ppl who did watch them before they were exposed) i don't understand how so many of their fans just didn't bother to understand the seriousness behind some of their actions and now they're all saying "im ashamed that i watched him" and i'm like "yeah you should be".
Same!
Plus never watched Shane either
I watched one out of curiosity and it gave me a panic attack.
I never even heard of him until this.
Everyone laughing and David calling Trisha "crazy" for feeling grossed out when she was expressing concern over the prank on Seth...
Omfg all the times he said “crazy”
I remember when Ally Hardesty came out with her video about Dom a few years back. The amount of hate she got makes me want to vomit to this day.
genuinely she’s owed such a huge apology for how she was treated during that time.
Also very upsetting to see that so many victim blaming comments from Ally's video were from young women
Yes! That was the moment I started despising the vlog squad. I feel so, so bad for her that David stans attacked her.
@Queen queen never have empathy for anyone without knowing who they are. it’s was concerning seeing how many people forgave scotty for his absolutely disgusting video defending jason and david, and how people still want to defend dom after what he did to hannah, which is just disgusting. and i totally agree with you, lots of women have internalized misogyny that they don’t realize they have, and they should definitely be educated on it too
stolenmeme was c
I don’t entertain whataboutisms in a debate. I simply reply with, “We’re not talking about that, we’re talking about X.”
They usually try again and I just keep bringing it back. “We can discuss that, but first we’re discussing X.”
Whataboutism is one of my least favourite logical fallacies. 😒
It depends on whether or not they were holding themselves accountable too for me
I had an (emotionally abusive) ex boyfriend who would “whatabout” me ALL the time whenever I tried to address something he did that hurt or upset me. He would always try to deflect by saying, “I only did that because you did this other thing first!”, and I would always respond with, “I hear that you’re upset about X and I definitely want to come back to that, but first I want to finish talking about Y and Z [thing that happened that upset me].”
Ultimately it all got me nowhere - he’d keep bringing it back, like you mention above - hence why he is an ex. I wish I could go back in time and tell younger me to tell HIM to fuck off 😞 I wasted so much of my time being manipulated and giving my abusers too many second chances.
@@Tori_with_a_T, unfortunately, it generally takes many crappy life experiences before you get to a point where you can spot that behaviour. *massive hugs*
I think the best thing we can do, is talk openly about this stuff so the next generation of women are armed with the confidence and knowledge to avoid it.
Actually, I lie. I have two sons who I’m actively teaching about consent from a very early age. Because raising boys who respect consent means they will hopeful grow into men who respect consent. THAT is the most important thing because the solution to r*pe is people not r*ping.
I forget where it was, but there was a place in the world where they did an ad campaign targeting men and focusing on consent and how women who are too drunk can’t give it, etc. and cases of SA went down dramatically.
it also happens to be the vlog squad's favorite fallacy 😭
@@agurena2012, when you don’t have a leg to stand on, logical fallacies are all you’ve got, really! 😒
What’s sad to me is that, similar to Hannah, a few years ago I used to love the vlog squad and was also living in the David Dobrik universe. But a part of me also kind of knew that the only woman in the vlog squad who seemed safe from gross sexual jokes and inappropriate behaviour was Liza, which makes sense given she was dating David. I used to fantasize about being a part of their group, but also worried that I’d be treated more like Corinna and Trisha, rather than Liza. And I think that was me knowing deep down that the environment David and his friends created was toxic.
It took me 8 years to realize that I was even a victim of SA, not even get to a point where I was could talk about it.
It took me a few years too. Because he was my bf at the time and I felt like that made it normal he wanted to do some things with me. I wasn’t in the mood at all, but I didn’t know I could refuse. So I’m not blaming him, but it’s still happened. I think we need to educate girls and boys that in any type if situation you can always refuse! Girls and boys can both refuse and shouldn’t be shamed for it.
I think a big part of why people often find this type of stuff triggering is because it's often the first time they've ever looked at their own experiences from a more objective, outsider perspective. Seeing people's responses to this story is hard because it's forced me to re-contextualize some of my own experiences when I was hanging out with a friend group ALMOST as toxic as the vlog squad. You've been telling yourself it wasn't a big deal for years, then you see other people being outraged and horrified and realize that all those feelings you repressed and invalidated as being "overly-dramatic" were in fact totally justified the whole time. It's easy to manipulate victims because we're often eager to gaslight ourselves because we'd rather invalidate our experience entirely than have to cope with it directly.
It also took me years to even think that I was a victim of SA. Prayers and healing for all of us that have gone though this .
Theres a lot of us realising they have been a victim of SA years later because we dont talk enough about what sa is and what falls in that category.
I'm so sorry 😪 What you've experienced was surely AWFUL, but I am glad to hear that you've been able to understand and acknowledge that you were a victim and have gotten to a place where you can start talking about it. That's HUGE!
I can relate with you so much. There are things that happened to me as a young child and as a teenager that I really just shoved down and ignored and never spoke of to anyone (including myself) until I was like 24. And even then I thought it was MY fault. It's taken years to finally understand that none of it was my fault, but I'm in my 30s now and I'm still trying to deal with it all emotionally and psychologically.
I wish you the best ❤❤
There similarities between the way Shane and David both fooled their audiences into brushing over the serious stuff in their videos is....disturbing, to say the least. Just shows how a façade on the internet really can give you power over what people see and think of you
Amen. I couldn't stop thinking about Shane while watching this video
I can't compare Shane with this guy. He's done the videos with racism that are bad...made jokes about children..but still there was never a rape situation..like a proven one. Not defending Shane..but I do think this other thing is way more serious and so much more that it would be injustice to even compare the two.
@@pistachiosandpopcorn7146 I don’t think one is less serious than the other. Both did gravely serious things.
@@pistachiosandpopcorn7146 I’m not sure. He nearly drove a CHILD to suicide. Both are disgusting and don’t deserve a platform.
Everyone knows a Sexual assault survivor but no one knows a predator... we ignored it & me too/ other important movements are showing society what is SA and what's not. This crew doesn't even realize they SA & R a human being because this behavior is normalized in society. We need to keep covering this story & showing people what consent is
And the sad thing is that when people name their sexual abuser, women will come out of the woodwork to defend the guy, even if they dont know him. You'll see so many women saying the victim is lying for "attention". Who wants attention for such a humiliating experience? No one. But people will defend the guys and blame the victims, so a lot of people dont want to name the abuser. They'll also be more concerned about ruining the guys life and reputation, but they dont consider how the victims life was ruined by the abuse.
@@jesalopez660 100% it's sickening
It sucks that dom is awful and deserves to be called out but he’s being used as a scapegoat for david and everyone else. David and the rest of them were probably so excited to hear that an article about dom was coming out so they could all divert the attention away from seth and toward the fact that dom is awful and they all chose to distance from him. Dom is being used as a scapegoat
Seth is dumb
Idk about Seth. Let’s just stick with supporting these women.
@@chetachi_ We can't say let's support the victims but only the women. We can't be like them. All of the are valid and deserve to be heard and believed.
@@TheBookdragonsCave agreed 100%!
@@TheBookdragonsCave I’m not saying “only support women” I’m saying I’m skeptical about Seth. If there were credible men accusing David then I’d put them in the mix as well. Also, I don’t agree with the “believe” part. Everyone should be listened to, considered and respected. But we can’t just promote a culture that says “believe” before we’ve been given all of the facts and necessary information. Remember what happened with Amber Heard? I don’t even want to bring up how many peoples lives were ruined because a hate mob decided to blindly “believe” the accuser. The “believe all victims” mantra is a destructive one. Every single person with an accusation should be taken seriously and treated with respect, believability shouldn’t even be part of the discussion.
I love how you brought up the fact that apologies do NOT have to be accepted immediately or ever. People are constantly being gaslit by these influencers supporters whenever they mess up as IF we need to forgive them for being shitty people.
Yeah the supporters would accept their apologies unaware its not them who gets to accept the apology since they arent the victims and they had the audacity to gaslight the actual victims of the problem saying to get over what this influencer did and brings up cancel culture
You’re exactly right. Forgiveness is given it can’t be taken or bought.
@@awkwardasfuckus8065 Yeah. Its entirely on the victims to forgive davud
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Thank you also for speaking out about on your Instagram Meghan. It’s absolutely DISGUSTING that he is STILL getting away with this shit. Absolutely ridiculous.
Thank you for speaking up
I’m so glad you’re covering this. The whirlwind of gaslighting, throwing each other under the bus, the story changes, it’s all SO much, and I know you can always sum it up really well. Plus I really don’t wanna watch anything they put out on this for fear of giving them any money.
I feel like I gave David a lot of credibility because he was with Liza. I wonder how much she was involved in some of these things.
I like to think that she didn't like that side of him and that's why they broke up. But who knows
She attended therapy after they broke up. A lot of things she said about attending therapy and why she did was relatable to me, because I also attende therapy after a breakup and came to realise that my ex was manipulative and loved to make me question myself. Liza seemed to have lost and then found herself, hence my suspicion
I think it gave him A LOT of credibility and it is probably why he tried to conceal the breakup for so long. David's manipulative nature and clear lack of empathy recasts their breakup for me. Liza seemed to feel it was totally her fault and the perception at the time was that David was perfect and without fault and would wait for her forever. I wonder how much the audience and Liza were manipulated in that situation as well.
Tbh I used to dislike her for some reason but didn't know why. Later I found out she did make lots of racist jokes with David but I know she doesn't do that anymore. You can search it up on RUclips too if you want
@@zakiatabassum9549 I also disliked her and couldn't pinpoint why. I think because everyone around her called her a "genius" all the time and I genuinely couldn't figure out if they were being serious or making fun of her.
Thank you for speaking about this! I work at a rape crisis center and just under 60% of the clients we see who get rape kits done had voluntarily consumed alcohol and/or drugs at the time of assault. There's this overwhelming cultural attitude that if somebody voluntarily is intoxicated and then is assaulted, the blame is on them or they should've been more careful, and a huge percentage of our clients grapple with guilt themselves wondering if it's 'their own fault'. Minnesota is flirting with legislation rn that basically says if the victim of an assault had voluntarily consumed alcohol/drugs, the assailant can't be charged, which is sickening. It's so important to emphasize that assault is *never* the fault of the victim. I'm glad that people are holding both Dom and David accountable for their roles; I hope that they both can realize how and why what they did was wrong and how much they hurt that girl.
The victim blaming I’m seeing in comments of other videos of people blaming that poor girl for her SA is just 🤮🤮🤮
Yeah, I’m not sure why people don’t understand that drinking alcohol means...you drank alcohol. It’s not equivalent to consenting to sex. Also, people love to say, “She shouldn’t have gotten that drunk.”
That completely ignores the fact that SOMEONE WHO IS DRUNK CAN’T CONSENT! 🤮
There is one person to blame for SA and one person, only...the r*pist.
The part about influencer apologies being bookmarks for defense and not actual apologies is so good
Agreed, Smokey described this pattern perfectly. I immediately thought of Jafar's golden couch video.
Crazy how the frenemies podcast interviewing Jeff got 1.5 Million views in 6 hours and it never got on the trending page
This
I think there’s something to be said about Trisha being labeled as the “crazy ex girlfriend” and the effect it not only had on her but on the things she tried to tell everyone about this group. I can’t imagine being painted in such a light by an entire big ass group of some of the most loved people on the internet (at the time) even indirectly. People are still on their side despite all the proof. I’m just glad that the victims came out and people aren’t attacking and invalidating them anymore
She only exposed them AFTER her heart was broken. If she saw anything before then she kept quiet. She will never be innocent or a victim in my eyes. Never.
@@harleyquin_3 well its a power balance maybe she thought she was in love and everything was normal. What would be your definition of a victim?
@@harleyquin_3 I can see that side of it, I don’t excuse her behavior but emotional manipulation is very real and it seems like this group would have gaslighted her into submission honestly. It seems like people who speak up just get shut out, and someone who has other issues involving past abuse and abandonment can fear this a lot. I also don’t think she knew someone would be sexually assaulted in any capacity. I do not excuse or accept any apologizes for any groups she offended as those are not my apologies to accept. Just a psychological analysis on the situation can give good insight into why people do what they do at the time.
One of the most heartbreaking parts that I heard was that the friend who was with Hannah (that was blacked out) “took over” so Dom would stop having sex .. with an unconscious woman !!!!! Disguised POS. All of them.
That is gut wrenching... He and his sick friends need to pay for what they did.
@@corneliastreets absolutely. It’s so disgusting. Heartless. All of them.
Ikr and there is photo evidence that pretty much all of those guys saw the girl was incapacitated and nobody did anything
Ok reading this makes me have a feeling in my stomach that made me both sad and disgusted🤮
Reading this actually made me nauseated.. I can only imagine how horrible it must have been in the moment for both of the girls
As someone who was sexually assaulted and abused for years by my boyfriend at the time, I didn't even acknowledge to MYSELF what was happening to MYSELF until 7 years after the fact. I didn't even intentionally try to realize it, it hit me like a ton of bricks on a 6 hour drive. It is ridiculous that people try to put a timeline on when is appropriate to "accuse" someone. Who can rightfully put a timeline on your emotional and mental processing when you yourself can't even know when that time will come.
On a lighter note...
I'm at the part of Smokey losing it over how to apologize and I have to say I just adore you Smokey Glow. You're so fired up and I love it
i really think it's time for all of us to 1) evaluate our parasocial relationships with creators 2) consider the culture we create when we attack victims or people who disagree in an attempt to silence them 3) acknowledge that just because we like someone on the internet doesn't mean they're a good person
This!!! Celebrity culture is so toxic
"all of us" ... u. not everyone does this
@@ellayatchi3721 not everyone but most people do 😭 it's the reason, or at least one of the major reasons, why people in the public eye (influencers, celebrities, popular accounts on social media, even politicians to a certain extent) can get away with doing so much. people have this undying loyalty to people they like or believe represents them in someway, which creates an environment in which they can never see these people as having done something wrong or being bad people.
with the way stan culture works now in our society, it's likely at an even higher extreme than it ever has been. the worst part is that most people don't even realize that this is what's happening to them. even people that continue to check in with themselves and (try to) make sure they're not becoming dependent on these people that they don't know and who don't know them probably still find themselves occasionally excusing or letting slide smaller things that their faves do even when they probably shouldn't.
@@ellayatchi3721 when they said all of us they weren't implying literally that everybody is blindly following these people, but by saying everybody and not just some people it catches the people who are complicit
When my sister and I were little, we fell into a habit of saying "sorry" and then not changing our behavior because we had mistakenly thought that an apology was all that was needed. In our child minds, saying "sorry" made things fine and nothing needed to change. Our dad noticed this and started responding with "sorry doesn't mean anything," because, at the time, when we said sorry, it DIDN'T mean anything.
That's what I keep wanting to say to these apology videos. "Sorry doesn't mean anything."
Same here, my dad used to tell me "i can't do much with your apology" and that's true, sometimes you can't do much with someone else's shallow apology and you need ACTIONS
Growing up my mom made us apologize and say "I'm sorry for doing xyz to you, I won't do it again, please forgive me" and then the other child got to...CHOOSE WHETHER OR NOT TO FORGIVE YOU. Crazy idea I know, but you are not owed forgiveness just because you apologize. Something these people don't realize.
Also loved the part where you said "sorry I'm yelling" then came back with a quiet serious tone 😂
Excellent mothering tip. Let your mom know it lives on because I'll be doing this too.
You got excellent mom.
Period! My mom told us from young that admitting to what you did wrong, apologizing, DOES NOT MEAN YOU GET TO ESCAPE CONSEQUENCES! Whether that be getting grounded, losing trust, or having a relationship end, you gotta eat that. You did what you did, and you have to accept the consequences period. And the people who you hurt, get to decide what those consequences are
If anyone wants to read the article but cannot pay for it, H3 read the entire article on their podcast titled “Insider article could destroy David’s career”
I think it's on Yahoo news for free too
Oooooh, thank you!
To emphasize your point in the final part of the video. Not only does trauma make you not want to talk about it or recognize it as traumatic, but also when you do talk about it to those close to you and they INVALIDATE it as "oh you asked for it. Shouldn't have done it. Well that's what you get for being an idiot," it really really does NOT help with the process at all. This happened in my case when I admitted to my mom that a predator groomed me to abuse me. After he was arrested and I told her, she said "no you chose to do so"
Wow I’m so sorry that happened to you 💜 and you’re right. Especially in situations such as this where alcohol is involved with sexual assault, it’s very hard to come forward and say anything because people always seem to blame the victim for choosing to drink.
As a mom, that almost makes my head explode. I'm so sorry she blamed you 💜 - there's no excuse for that.
@@sheelfjohnson I am so happy for new gen moms who understand rape culture and support victims of sa. Thankyou and bless you and your family
It wasn't your fault. This is why most victims can't speak up
Speaking from personal experience, I laugh when I'm uncomfortable. A guy who was about a year older than me in school explicitly told me to my face that the first day he met me he had a sexual dream about me later that night. I laughed it off because I didn't know how to respond and what else I could do besides laugh. Karina laughing about Dom putting his hand up her skirt and telling him to stop, she is not laughing because she thought his response was funny, she is laughing to comfort herself because she's uncomfortable and doesn't know what else she can do. David festered this toxic environment where there is no boundaries and anytime someone tries to set them they immediately get demonized for it. There *absolutely* should be repercussions for it.
this is a very important comment
my only thing is that i do not think that trisha could have predicted what could have happened. she could have also just heard that alcohol was being involved and left. so i see where she's complicit but it is difficult to tell. trisha has also been talking about how problematic they are for years and that deserves some credit too. i was sooo skeptical about her and didn't like her but ever since frenemies you can see how much she tries to grow and invests in working on herself, its commendable. otherwise, this story literally makes me cry and i agree about how crazy it is that time and time again the point is just completely missed when they "address" things
The thing is, say what you want about Trisha ... she pretty much owns what she does wrong, etc etc. She has had and gone through a lot of 💩 and overcome so much. She’s made really bad choices and has seemingly attracted the wrong kind of people and surrounding herself with people who didn’t care about HER. I hope we can continue to see her grow while not losing herself in the process.
I was going to comment something similar. I see where smokeys coming from but according to trisha when David first asked Jason to get alcohol she said no and refused to let him. She recognized that it was a bad situation and left, which I don't think she should be shamed for.
She and Ethan did a fremenies live around the same time as this video went up and Trisha did say that she feels complicit, like she should have done more, and guilt over it, so she can't believe that other people who were there feel nothing and just care about losing sponsors
Just a reminder that Jeff admitted that he didn’t even read the article before making a 20 minute video bashing the author
"It just serves as a bookmark for their fans to reference when defending them" is SUCH a good way of putting it. These cringe non apologies are truly disturbing
One of the contributing factors of Trishas erratic behavior was the extensive gaslighting she experienced attempting to have a committed relationship with Jason. I still question how that came about; did David request Jason to get involved with her for content. And as semi committed relationship began, she started to push back on many of the things the squad was doing that was inappropriate, herself included there was so much toxicity for anyone to handle let alone someone that was desperate to be accepted and loved. There’s so much more to say but it’s been a long day unpacking from so many different directions.
Totally agree. Jason would threaten to dump her if she had a problem with the vlogs, and David and Jason were constantly calling her crazy when she tried to object to things. The clip of her voicing that she didn't want Jason to kiss Seth for the "prank" was a perfect example and it was far from the only time it happened. The gaslighting was in full force. I'm not surprised she removed herself from the situation instead of trying to stop it - David had never listened to her objections before, why would he this time?
The amount of gaslighting I see now that I’m aware of the whole situation rewatching old vlog clips is INSANE. The amount of times they call her crazy, and tell her she shouldn’t be upset over something ANY girl would feel violated by (ie. David sneaking into Jason and Trishas hotel room, hearing them have sex, and then filming her naked afterwards, Jason literally says in his own vlog “trishas pretending to be upset now” and laughs.. WHAT?!) No wonder she’s been as angry as she has been for all these years. I hate that I defended them back when this was all happening.
y’all owe trisha an apology
Not gonna lie Hannah, when you started yelling ‘BANANAS,’ I thought you were gonna pop out of my screen. I was truly afraid. 100 points for getting the message across tho
Your small take on cancel culture is so satisfying for me. I’m sick of people saying the it’s bad and try to act above it, they never consider that creators heart people and never think about the victim and it piss me of so much that the victims get overshadowed so much. Is aways “think about the abusers mental health” and not the victims.
At 4 minutes, you bring up the most important point. He made this evening sound like an awesome experience. Could you imagine that level of gaslighting? That poor girl had so much to dig into to realize she was actually as$@ulted. I hope that makes sense. This story is so incredibly triggering. And I think it’s important to note that this exact event happens to probably every girl you know. It truly is that common.
I have to credit H3H3 for always hearing trisha out about David and pushing about it. Because the author of the insider article even said they only started looking into it because of them.
“IT IS BANANAS TO ME...Sorry I’m yelling” No, go off!!!
This is a lot like Shane Dawson. "Shock humor" or "dark humor" is the biggest cover for "We know this is problematic but it's okay because I'm a 'Nice Guy' and look I said sorry so you can't change the past"
I saw this similarity too - however, I don't think David Dobrik has ever really apologized for anything in the past to my limited knowledge so he could never pull the whole "I already apologized for this" line that Shane and Jeffree Star use constantly.
@@emilymacdougall184 I guess that's true. They just both rely on concrete evidence of them doing good things to point to to prove they're "nice guys"
@@kaseygall6 True, there's always this massive downplaying of past faults
Its worse. Sexual abuse actually occurred, and was fucking filmed.
The Dobrick “apology” was the worst “apology” ever. He didn’t even really say what he was apologizing about.
@@user-dt9hfccxdfhhhigf What i find rather annoying is that he hyperfocuses on the stuff that got brought up and called out about he didnt even address even the other content that wasnt talked about and he downplayed his actions to make it sound it was blown out of preportion
theres a non-verbal analysist who looked at the apology and he didnt look up what it was about to try and be unbaised and he was literally like, "I watched this whole damn thing and I dont know what it was about. Tell me in the comments" and even the comments couldnt really agree what he was "apologizing" about
I hope that this man actually now is „cancelled“ and doesn’t just come back in a couple months like nothing ever happened with ppl still supporting him
God I hope not .... I’ll lose hope in people at that point
unfortunately the latter will happen
Its happened😢
I was disturbed by the whole vlog squad when one of them started dating a minor as a 24 year old. I am 21 now, which is an even smaller difference but I can not imagine dating an 18 year old. The maturity difference is tremendous. That’s without the economic power imbalance. They all protected and supported him too. :/
it’s understandable because david grew up with dom
@@alxandro5504 pretty sure she’s talking about Brandon Calvillo in this comment not Dom.
@@briannaellis3542 oh
Honestly thank you for bringing up that saying "yes" after giving twelve "no"s isn't really consent. I think many people (myself included) were pressured into engaging in activity they weren't ready for/were not enthusiastic about only to blame themselves later for "giving in" to that pressure. When the reality is that no one should pressure you, period. So no one should feel like they're at fault for "giving in" to pressure from the people in their lives or the society in which they live. I hope these victims can find peace and that drawing attention to this can prevent further harm. Thank you for making this video. ❤️
this is so dumb. They are accountable for their own fng actions. STOP blaming everyone else. You do something 11 times it's On them. My god what is wrong with people
And nothing good can come with with single men or not single, young women and alcohol.
@@kathy-t5q lmao. What’s wrong with you? 😂😂
Imagine blaming victims because they were drunk. Lmao.
I THINK ITS BANANAS - okay that was yelling - ᶦ ᵗʰᶦⁿᵏ ᶦᵗˢ ᵇᵃⁿᵃⁿᵃˢ
that made me laugh ngl
When you realize how lucky you are that you were never a fan of this disgusting vile content, manipulative person is like wow glad I was watching laura diy at.13 and smokey glow at 17 because it desensatizes kids to this and high key put them in danger of being in the scenario
I'm so glad I never watched his content. I remember others mentioning him as the dude who gave away cars but my mind was like "ok and?" Like I'm the type of person to question any gifts sent ny way, and now its clear those cars and all that money were bribes to make us think he's a good guy. Charity doesn't always mean morally good.
Same here. I can't prove it..but I have never been a fan. I was a fan of Shane..cause he's more likable IMO. Definitely not defending him..but saying Shane has a very likable side. I don't see a likable side with David. I see someone that only cares about being on top with money and fame. I didn't watch any of his videos till now. Or I should say I tried to watch him before all this one time and I thought he was terrible.
Also he never fooled me with his "charity".
@@pistachiosandpopcorn7146 he scammed kids with his lottery "puzzle" and people still bought it
A few years ago I tried to watch his videos but I just didn’t like them, I never understood his/the vlog squads humour 🤷🏾♀️
I know this is gonna sound dumb, but you being so passionate about this (or screaming how you say it) is like a breath of fresh air. I was SA and this means a lot to me, it feels like you are giving a voice to all of us. Ily
I hope this goes to civil court, Her sa was monetized, and the least they could do is that money go to her.
Trisha Paytas was a victim of sa in her past. I feel like she probably hadn’t dealt with her own trauma yet in order to even realize she needed to help Hannah that night. I don’t excuse it but I know how intense it can be to be in a sa situation and years later be violated again or exposed to it again. It is really hard to know it is unacceptable if that is all you’ve known in your life. The rehabilitation it takes to recognize bad sexual behaviors is heavy and takes years. I think maybe she thought leaving was her way of escaping her own triggers as much as wanting to show she disapproved. Self preservation is strong is all I’m saying. Maybe I’m making sense.
My thoughts exactly. Being a survivor or sa myself. in my younger years I would leave any situation that I closed to that. I wished I acted differently but we don’t alway react the way we wish.
no
I also think Jason may have been mentally abusive to her.
and trisha spoke to the girls and they said no they were not interested in sex just there to have a good time.
As someone who also went through almost literally the same thing as that girl, I’m 1)so proud of her for coming forward and 2) thankful to her for coming forward, because when you’re assaulted in that way, when alcohol is involved and it doesn’t look like what people think the “typical” sexual assault is, it’s really hard to feel okay talking about it, or feeling like you have the right to say you were assaulted, because you think people will tell you it wasn’t assault. That’s something I’ve really struggled with and seeing people rally behind this girl and tell her her story is valid and she is right to feel violated just makes me feel a lot better about how people around me would treat me if I decided to tell my story.
You are valid, 100%. My really close friend has struggled with her story as well, and unfortunately it seems like so many of us know a survivor with a similar story. I know I don’t know you, but I’m proud of you too. Keep on keeping on.
Even if doing it for David's vlog and David gave go ahead, you don't solicit for something like this. It is serious and way over these immature vlogers head. The girl could have died. Luckily one girl didn't drink so she could drive, or she could have gotten pregnant, lost her virginity to this creep who was not into her or got a disease. Not to mention humiliation etc. This is why they needed to be called out. So other men will think twice. Women are not there for your amusement. Got IT!!!!!!!! and all the members should be ashamed and don't follow orders that are immoral not because you don't want to get caught but because you wouldn't want it done to you, or your sister, mother etc. Do you want to see your sisters or mothers limp body laying there (luckily alive) and have to feel that icky feeling of being someones kicks. and David always doing these videos slept with her mother (addison)
I’m sorry that happened to you. As someone who also has gone through the same thing, this video really hit home as I completely relate. Your pain is valid and what happened to you was horrible and vile and is assault on all regards. I wish you all the best in wherever you are in your process and send my love and prayers.
Have you considered making a podcast? You're so well-spoken and fun to listen to, I'll always leave your videos playing in the background when I'm doing any sort of work/chores and it makes time fly because you know how to keep an audience. Love you and your content so much!
Fellow survivor here: please take some time for self-care, Hannah, and everyone else who has been through similar situations ❤️
❤️
💞
❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💗
This whole situation is so scary and it's exactly why women feel unsafe, because majority of men don't call out their friends for SH/SA. I don't care if Jeff or Scotty or other "nice guys" have never harrased or assaulted someone, they watched their friends do it and said nothing, and that is just as bad.
The "it is BANANAS TO ME-I'm sorry, I'm yelling. It is. Bananas to me..." is all of us other well-adjusted adults right now, too.
The other thing about apologies is that no one is ever owed someone’s forgiveness. You can apologise well, explain why it happened, show growth over time, and STILL the person you hurt is within their rights to not forgive you.
Yep!
this!!
I once had someone who really hurt me tell me that because she apologized to me I had to forgive her which is so stupid. I still haven't forgiven her.
@@lauras5359 I blame Christianity for making victims believe they have to forgive whether they want to or not.
@@maheenm.k1015yeah I do struggle with that. Just because someone apologizes doesn't mean you have to be a "good person" and forgive them. I mean maybe I have forgiven her but I will never forget or trust her, and I most certainly am still mad
You know who else is complicit? RUclips. For always promoting these kinds of people. Smh.
Thanks for such a pertinent video! ✨
YES. WHY ARE THEY STILL SUPPORTING THEM. They trended David’s apology for fucks sakes.
David and his squad/defenders: They're only doing this for clout!!!!
David: *makes an entire career out of exploiting ppl for clout*
David thinks because he gives everyone a free car he’s a good person and isn’t to blame for anything lmao
Sounds like Shane Dawson
I guarantee a majority if not all of those cars are provided by sponsors too.
I bet you wouldn’t turn a car down if he came to you 🤡
@@loganpeterson6702 yes Logan, you caught me. I’m just dying for a car from my god David dobrik 🙌
I kinda feel lucky because I never watched any of the vlog squad content. I remember hearing other youtubers talk about him as the cool guy who gives away cars and I was like "ok im glad he gives away stuff but like what else is there to him?" And tbh i feel he used charity to divert attention from his sick twisted content. Like how can a guy who gives away teslas be a bad guy? Easy when its a diversion
Even though I am not a big fan of Trisha or Ethan (I just got into the podcast though so this is changing a little), I'm really touched with how hard they're going to make sure the victims (the girls, Seth, etc.) and their stories are heard, despite some comments saying they don't want to hear about the VS situation anymore. David has such a big platform so it's nice to see others with a big platform as well raising awareness on a serious situation that, if Trisha and Ethan hadn't started the conversation, people would have never known about.
@Queen queen Yes! You have a great point there. It's important for men to see that calling out other men for inappropriate behavior (instead of just pretending they don't see it) isn't a "lame" thing to do.
From what I have seen thus far, Ethan reminds me of the kind of men where I can feel safe being in a room alone with him.
@@KristinaEspinoza can we also talk about how serious he took the interview with Jeff? Ethan is known for being a terrible interviewer in the past as well as not doing any research for the podcast (despite the podcast having such a large following which is definitely irresponsible) but he did such a great job with the research and questions for Jeff. He definitely put effort into this episode and it shows despite being an emergency episode. I'm so happy about that.
@@Andrea-dm4gd I wasn't aware that Ethan was a terrible interviewer since I've only seen the Frenemies podcast so far and I don't think I've seen any guests featured so far. Makes my respect for him go higher tbh.
14:18 "it is literally just an apology to service as a bookmark, for their fans to reference when defending them. There is no substance."
Uhhhm okay poet 🙌
!!!
Hanna, I’m a 36 year old man living in Sweden and this video just warms my heart. Strong, vocal women like you are what RUclips and society in general needs. Keep it up! ✊🏽
yikes i feel bad for u
@@alxandro5504 getting bitter under a harmless positive comment is pathetic
@@3eiseden bitter? yeah, no.
@@3eiseden you really thought you did something 🥱
@@alxandro5504 Grow up 🙄
Let's be honest, DD created a hostile work environment and used the power imbalance to manipulate those around him. He is accountable because this never should have happened. If he were a good human being with empathy and a conscience this would've been prevented.
@Queen queen absolutely 10000000%
@Queen queen not only did he film it but he also fosters the environment that enabled it. Let’s be real, those girls were not there for Dom, they were there to meet David and the VlogSquad
We should stop blaming women for men's actions. Trisha was also a victim of Vlog's Squads manipulation tactics.
Speaking as someone who also suffers from BPD like trisha, I think the biasness you refer to is a symptom we tend to suffer from called "Splitting" it's basically a black and white, all or nothing defence mechanism we have, which usually causes us to think of situations in absolutes. So it can come off as biasness because she doesn't tend to see the nuance when looking back at a situation or person that has traumatised her.
I was hoping I’d see someone else with BPD in the comments saying this. I believe Trisha herself has discussed splitting either on her channel or on the podcast. I feel like sometimes people see us do it and think we’re just bitter or something, rather than understanding that it’s a coping mechanism.
I have bpd as well and damn this is so real and I hope trisha gets help with that and realise and learn about herself more
Me too and boy is the splitting real! I'm glad Trisha is going to DBT now. It's helped me a lot.
Trisha does not have alters. She faked something so so sensitive. Nobody says anything about it though. She almost single handedly tore down a "community" that already isn't believed by people.
@@laurajames5714 we aren’t talking about Trisha’s false claims of having DID, we’re talking about her having borderline personality disorder from the perspective of people who also have borderline personality disorder. And from what I’ve seen, she is quite regularly and rightfully called out for faking DID.