Me too! I would not allow this girl thinking this is okay for her parents to do this to her! You know if SuperNanny had these people on the show she would definitely come down hard on the parents
To be honest it kind of seemed like she exaggerated the bad parts to make jokes about those situations and to highlight how things had changed. Like yeah it had its bad parts but ignoring her parents changed to an extend is also unfair. Parents are human too and we barely know anything about them really to make that judgement.
@@LinnieAlexis nop, we Asian like that, parents have hard laws She's father love her because that doing that If you live here then you will understand she have very good father
@@kuroihana3228 just because it's out of love doesn't mean it's good. Those parenting strategies are very toxic and harmful and would be considered emotional abuse.
@@kuroihana3228 Culture doesn't make it right. Breaking your children's stuff because of anger is abuse. It's not normal or ok whether you this is common or not.
Psychologists say that a parent who gives the silent treatment for especially long periods of time actually emotionally scar their children... Sending love to you girl❤
I think that what a lot of people (including me) need to understand is that even though you know your parents love you and want to protect you that doesn’t mean they can’t be abusive in some ways.
I’m not a therapist, but if you feel they hate you then that’s a different kind of abuse and you should go to someone about it. I really wish the best for you!
Yeah... I’m pretty sure even if your parents are trying to protect you, if you get abused in any way you should talk it out with your parents or see a counsellor or therapist
This just popped up in my recommends, but I genuinely hope you’re seeing a therapist. You’re parents aren’t “overbearing”. That’s abuse. Neglect and destruction of property in fits of anger to make you feel both imprisoned and insecure in your own environment is abuse. And it’s kinda wild hearing it discussed so nonchalantly. 😳
Den's probably so nonchalant about it because she might lack an outside perspective on her situation. You know how a lot of abusers will do things to isolate the victim (keep them away from friends or family, destroy relationships, KEEPING THEM INSIDE THEIR WHOLE LIFE)? It's to normalize the situation in the victim's head because, without an outside person looking in to tell her this isn't okay behavior, the situation seems normal. As such, this is her normal, so why make a big deal about it?
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother. Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
imagine having your parents hate you because you’re 12 and mess shit up and get grounded because of asking for something you want and have a iphone 5 that crashes and they get mad at me for no reason✌️
This was not even a joke for me it was real haha I finished classes at 6pm when I was in highschool and nightfall was at 5-6 pm during winter. And my dad was often angry at me because "it's dangerous when you walk in the streets during night you have to come back to home before nightfall" - -'
They just want excuses to enact their sadistic desires while remaining "righteous" so they can pretend they're the wonderful people they're NOT. It's human nature.
I’m not sure she is even aware that she got emotionally abused her entire child/teenage/young adulthood. She talks about it in such an innocent tone. It’s honestly really sad. It may not be physical (punching, belts, etc.) but it’s still soulless.
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother. Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
Eh, we could have a conversation with the mom but with the dad, I think something we need to remember is how hard it is to break the cycle of abuse. The fact that he had the restraint to not repeat his father's actions is commendable. He may not be perfect, but it's not fair to expect that. My mother was an abuse victim. She did everything in her power not to pass that on, but yes, she still got angry, she yelled a lot, she had a habit of not listening. And those were definitely frustrating, but I don't think it's fair to call that abuse in her context. She broke the abuse cycle, and her children can take the next step and be even better to their kids. Same here. He broke the cycle, not perfectly bur he broke it. Den can take the next step to not do the things he did to her to her kids. I don't think it's fair to not be understanding here.
I agree with both of you on this one because although parents can get mad ,they also mean well and don't mean to upset you in a way that you stop talking to them. But there can also be parents who abuse you just because they wanted to
Den I think you should read some self help books on abuse. Abuse can come in different shapes and sizes. Not all abuse is the same and in most cases the victim will blame themselves or cover for the abuse and think of it as tough love. I'm not saying your parents are bad, but understanding why and how can help a lot in many ways. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I really like your channel :3
I feel like this is a good point, but coming from someone who got hit by both parents quite a bit in childhood, and someone who’s mom is great at insulting me and my sibling: I feel like there are bigger topics we should cover and fix first. i entirely agree with you that cypher is/was having a pretty bad time, and if she actually has anxiety or something else as an affect of that, she should get some help. but i have a couple friends who have a much worse life than me. much worse kinds of abuse. not limited to abandonment and using any tool to beat them harder than i ever got. so . just my point is.. we can try to focus on other more important subjects. but this comment is pretty helpful.
I agree It’s probably very very unhealthy to live in a house where if you make the slightest mistake your parents will make you fear for your belongings or if they will even put food on your table. And forcing a young kid to break in her knuckles, also very inappropriate behavior for a parent And any comments, do not even try to defend it by saying there Asian, that doesn’t excuse any of their actions
Dads of daughters: “No boyfriends, ever!” Also those same dads when their daughter is still single with no kids by 35: “Planning on starting a family soon?” General vibe that I got from the thumbnail
Tell me about it one time I got in an argument with my parents which in my case I was winning and all of a sudden my parents thought it was disrespect and grounded me 😌
Not really i love my parents and they have amazing tactics to make sure that I play by his rule. But yeah some tactics may or may not backfire like my parents unknowingly gave me phobias and this video is a prime example of this. Not saying your view is wrong but it's just my view on the situation.
My little sister was crying (3 yrs old) she couldn't say what she wanted so my mom and her stupid favorite db child was like shouting at my 3yo sister "WHAT DO YOU WANT!? " "ughh JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT AND SHUT UP" which made her cry more and more and it was hella loud so my sleep was disturbed I was so annoyed I told them shouting at her won't make her talk nor make y'all understand what she wants Soooo my mom talked to her calmly but I couldn't go back to sleep
@@duxkie_speedpaints8097 its the worst when THEY TELL YOU TO ''StOp cRyInG'' LIKE YOU CONTROL IT THEY JUST MAE IT WORST BY BEING RUDE AND BLAMING THE FISHING VICTIM
You know, a bird learns how to fly from their parents. If a parent is unable to teach their child how to survive the outside world, they've failed as parents. Your parents meant well, but their behavior sort of...screwed you over? I'm glad you're keeping it on the chin and that you have a great relationship with your parents now, but if it were me I wouldn't want anything to do with them. X'D
My dad's childhood was terrifying. He has 6 siblings and his dad when he got mad he would lock him in the basement too until morning. One day my dad was walking to the garden and his father was on the roof and jumped in front of him with a knife. He did that also to my uncles and aunts. Rn he has pills and he's not doing that anymore, thanks for listening my story
I agree 100%. Speaking from personal experience within my own family, don't allow physical/mental abuse to take over your household, regardless of whether you are a parent or child.
@Edie Rose yes but I feel like it crossed the line into emotional abuse. I understand the intention but it's just a very unhealthy way to treat your daughter
ok i feel straight up BAD for this girl. just right now,imagine your own father screaming at you,being extremely angry,you holding a toy, tears rolling down your face,him taking your toy and crushing it,and then when you tell your mom, she will get ,mad at you for not standing up for yourself and not talk to you for 21 days!!! and she is saying they are "tough" parents? MORE LIKE ABUSIVE!!THATS LITTERALLY ABUSE TO SCREAM AT YOU KID AND WRECK YOU STUFF AND TO NOT TALK TO YOUR KID FOR WEEKS!! THATS AS BAD AS NOT GIVING YOUR KID FOOD!!!!
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother. Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
They gave food to her. And also she said she has a great relationship with her parents now so that means that whatever happened then she has forgiven and moved on (maybe) I know what abuse is and that’s not it.
*Share My Story:* My Dad Hates My Boyfriend *ACTUALLY HAPPENED:* My Parents Hated My Boyfriend But He Changed Everything *CypherDen:* My Dad Hated My Boyfriend *Batman:* _ERROR 404: Parents not Found_
An abusive father is a dad who uses his children/wife to blow some steam A restricted father is a person who put too much rules on his children/wife and it usually done for the sake of protecting them (regardless of weather it's the right way or not) Her grandfather abused her father, but her father really restricted her childhood. They are two separate things
@KAYLEE SAW ZI YAN uh....having a fit because your child struggles to comprehend something and punishing them for it _is abusive._ you guys just think that's normal. It's not an assumption either considering the main people you hear talking about how strict asian parents are _are asian kids._ We aren't being rude and making things up, we're going based off of what we've been told by what could be called a reliable source.
Oh god, this all sounds waaaaaaaay too familiar. My dad used to break things, scream, threaten, insult, and just overall throw tantrums. That stressed my mom out and so she became more emotionally distant and snappy. They were extremely overprotective too, to the point of making me keep a GPS tracker on my phone until 21. It’s okay to love your parents and I’m glad they’ve improved, but please don’t think that behavior was okay, you definitely didn’t deserve it. Trust me, I rationalized it too for a loooong time until I finally said no more and set boundaries. Of course they’re angry about the boundaries, but honestly they’ll get over it. You definitely deserved way better then that, no kid deserves to go through that. Sending good vibes
Am I the only one who finds that blatantly sexist? Like girls aren't some fragile porcealine dolls who need constant protection. And the idea that they need there "innocence" protected is so ignorant to how people actually are
@@bruhguy1636 So dose that have the right for parents to treat their kids like this? Because their “Asian”? Like, I don’t care if you or your parents come from Pluto! This is indeed toxic parenting! I do NOT wanna allow people thinking that this type of parenting is normal!
@@VioletFeatherWind Well actually, it really depends on the parents and the place, condition, culture, and time they lived through, not all asian parents are that strict, i knew some who were pretty laid back actually. Some may beat you physically or just give you verbal beatdowns but some are doing it because it's the only way they knew how to give discipline, they usually reconcile with you afterwards, for my experience, my family has a rule that mostly works 99% if done properly which is Take care of them(usually spoiling them) until the age of 4-6, Then afterwards be strict to them until middle to late teenhood(during which you can teach them valuable things) then after that, start to lighten your grasp around them but still advicing them. Asian parenting are only grouped into one category because they are highlighted on the strict and beating stereotype but you can usually find this all over the world like the Latin and Hispanics, Africans, Middle Easterns and so on
@@spikedragonym331 I dunno i saw some that would still take care of them as normal like cook them food ready up their things the only difference is that they talk less to them, you could say it's a tsundere like behavior
I really hope your parents aren't still raising any of your siblings. Going so far as to not talk to your child for three weeks is easily considered neglect. You don't ghost your own kid.
Cypher... I'm only 2 min into the video but I have to say this. Your father didn't break the cycle of abuse. He just emotionally abused you instead of physically abused you. Growing up in fear is not okay and having your possessions destroyed is not discipline. My father only laid his hands on me twice but that doesn't mean he didn't constantly abuse me. I... Just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone and it doesn't mean your dad is a bad person but his behavior towards you, how he didn't handle his anger, that wasn't okay. *Hugs*
I was thinking the same thing too...A parent breaking your things and hitting stuff is not okay...I don't know her dad and I'm sure she loves him and he tried his best. In a way he broke the cycle by not physically abusing them, which is great, but he found another, still unhealthy, way to release his anger :/
CypherDen's dad: "I don't wanna be like that bastard I'm supposed to call my dad." Also CypherDen's dad: "You want to go outside and actually have a life? REEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"
Other parents: I'm sorry for invading your privacy by using your phone without permission my parents: *WDYM ITS YOUR PHONE I BOUGHT IT AND NOTHING IS YOURS UNTIL YOU TURN 24*
Heck I feel really bad for Den.. Her mothers extremely toxic for flat out ignoring her for weeks over literally nothing, and her dads anger issues created an emotional abuse cycle. That wasn't "tough love" or an "*insert nationality* family" that was two parents who needed a kick in the butt and some good old fashioned therapy. It sucks she can't really bring herself to see it, a lot of people can't, I mean why are so many people still in toxic relationships? They just can't bring their self to see that what the person they love is doing something so bad as abuse. I'm glad she's finally more away from that but it's also bad that she doesn't know how to function in life because she was denied a childhood to learn things.
lmao,my parents did the exact same thing while I was growing up. I realize some petiole are stronger physically/mentally when it comes to stuff like this.Depending on how bad the situation is.I feel as though mine were just strict.If they broke something that they gave to me, they bought it so really they wasted their money.I never got treated indifferent or badly but I will say that because of the way my dad and mom raised me,I feel better as a person today
yeah, it seems like she's on good terms with them now, so hopefully they realized the error of their ways and apologized but yeah, I think keeping a good distance is best and if she and George have kids, they'll know not to treat their kids the same way
Exactly this 100% this isn't "strict" this is emotional and manipulative abuse by people who need therapy to sort through their own adult issues. Taking it out on your kids for not solving your own trauma is not right.
Uhhh, sorry, but this video was just depressing. The happy and comedic visuals didn't win me over, but you sure tried your damndest, Den, so props for that. Other than that, I'm glad that you've grown into a socially functional person.
@rafael Perez Urbina It's unfortunate that I can only reply with something so...neutral? We don't know Den's life. Maybe the parents once pulled her aside at one time and basically said, "Yeah, we F'd up. Let's talk through this as a family." or something. Personally, I'd like to just assume that Den's a happy individual and leave it at that. It's not fair to assume or theorize and so on about one person who would prefer not to have other people do that.
Oliver, Michael . I actually was one of those kids that was hit in childhood and had the never ending high standards of asian mom. but i function as a normal human. i interact with people, laugh at jokes, i can easily do all that. i do have trauma (not really from that, it was something else that had do with a near death of my brother) but i think back on it sometimes and i feel pain, but i still work like a normal human. if you’re being affected by something bad i suggest therapy? we don’t know aswell, maybe den had some time to get help if she needed it.
This is just plain abusive, it may not be phyiscal abuse but it MENTAL abusive I’m actually surprised ur not traumatized or anything but hey you’ve grown into a pretty great person. Edit: I’ve seen some people say that’s this is just Asian culture and well I’m Asian too and I personally disagree, I grew up in a kinda abusive home, my dad use to beat my mom, I would get hit a lot even tho I was only 6, IN FACT my dad when he ever got mad WOULD BREAK STUFF IN THE HOUSE, my parents would constantly get into fights AND SCREAM in the house. To me that’s abusive, but now it’s okay everyone’s is chill and cool with each other. I think what Denise’s parent did to her was a bit overboard, like cmon your kid does something wrong u teach them what they did wrong then help then make sure they don’t make that mistake again u don’t IGNORE them for WEEKS, whenever u get MAD u don’t break stuff in the house that’s just wrong. I also think it’s wrong that her parents sheltered her like that, sure the world is scary BUT EVERYTHING IS SCARY u don’t hide from ur fears U FACE THEM AND GET OVER THEM, my parents never did anything like that to me in fact they wanted me to do extra curriculums activities. But that’s just my opinion
She IS traumatized. That's why these stories idpf abuse thinly described as "funny stories" dominate her videos. Through her art she is letting out the pain. It's a form of self-therapy. Personally I think she could use some professional help working out her trauma as well....
Fice Gaming i mean true... but a lot of ethic parents who had us around their 30s or later, and were raised in a different country, aaand were also raised similar when they were young, that’s just the way they knew, or thought they should raise us. Also them having us at an older age meant that they wouldn’t understand our generation a lot more and they’re raising kid in a whole new country where we, born here, learn American culture and the freedom our friends have. Basically they didn’t know what to do and just wanted to have control over us to make sure we just stay alive and don’t get “bad influences”.
Fice Gaming I was verbally abused for most of my childhood so I couldn’t talk for a while so I didn’t know and to this day I can’t really tell what is abusive except for physical abuse
Looking at the comments, I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one to see that this is abuse. My family has a similar story that is still going on. my great grandma was severely abused by her mother (one time her mother slammed a car door on her legs because she was taking too long to get out of the car), and the next generation, my great grandma wasn't physically abusive towards my grandma, but it was hard to know for my grandma, if her mom really loved her, because my great grandma was scared to make connections with her children and possibly be a repeat of what happened to her. Cut to when my mom was born, and my grandma didn't have a good mother to base how to raise her children off of, so she was so loose on her kids that she wasn't surprised when some of my uncles came home with the police (they were being too rody most of the time, nothing too serious, but not good either). Now it's me and my mom. My mom wants to be a good mother, and she has a good base, but she can be emotionally abusive. I won't go into details, because it hurts, but I really want to be close to my mom, but she won't even admit that she has a problem and seek help. And you already know that ya girl won't say anything because I don't want to hurt my mom's feelings, or get yelled at. Parents out there: keep yourselves in check. Be 100% brutally honest with yourselves and maybe create a way for your children to call you out on things you're doing wrong without being scared, because, as much as it may hurt now, it will hurt a whole lot more if your children cut you out for good because you never knew how emotionally abusive you were being.
What strict parents think they teach: Good morals. How to be smart. How to not have any kids till your mid 20s. What they actually teach: How to hear when a parent is about to barge into your room. How to fake things like grades. How to be an excellent liar.
Den's Dad: Gets angry and breaks her things, won't let her COOK, and won't let her go out, gets pissed at the mention if boys Den's Mom: When she's mad at her daughter, she INGORES HER for weeks at a time, also won't go out. Both: Get mad at her about not knowing how to cook rice AND WON'T TALK TO HER FOR A MONTH bc her dad never let her cook. Den: hAhA FuNnY sToRy AbOuT mY fAmIlY, nOt aBuSiVe At aLl. ThEy LoVe Me AnD iT's *Q U I R K Y* Seriously, her parents are messed up. I know it might be hard for her to tell because she didn't get out enough to know, but her parents are most likely mentally abusive
This is one of the rarest times I feel so relatable, I went through everything literally everything you mentioned but just .....worst type of thing....
imagine having the homeless guy that pees on your window as your only friend tho like just having a conversation about how you parents are strict while they try to comfort you
Dad- *doesnt want to be like his dad* Also dad- *is his dad in some ways* Parents- *NAMES ALL 3 CHILDREN DENISE?* Edit: yeah guys this was only I joke, I know that when you have an abusive parent, being raised by them could lead to you having some of their qualities and life styles, this comment was only something to make people laugh.
I mean if you have an abusive parent there's a high chance you're gonna pick up some stuff from them because of how you were raised. I know a guy who's grandpa was very abusive and the guy's dad picked up a little bit of that stuff but the guy I know now is cool and he's not abusive in the slightest.
Wow I didn't know there were alot of Filipino animators out there and I also experienced what your dad experienced from his dad it's just so depressing
@@weeniehutjrs8822 I'm not insulting them I just think it's not healthy to think of this as "Though love" because is abusive parenting.They are not tryint to take care of her, they are being very bad parents and it's bad for people to see that as "love and care"
@@angrycat8894 I will just sya this: 1- Instead of teaching her how to talk and solve problems, her mother would ignore her. That's not how you deal with a kid who is only learnign how to cope with life 2- Her dad would have violent outbursts in front of her to the point when she was afraid of him. Even if he didn't hurt HER he destroy things that where valuable to her and show her that's the "right" way to deal with your anger: by having out burts, because a kid do what his parents do. 3- They did not allow her to have a normal social life and develop the skills she needed to survive in this world, they kept her locked away, is that true life? We all got rules and limits but not allowing her to have friends is a bit too much 4-She was afraid of talking to her parents, that proves the point that she could not be a normal kid, any good parent should be a confident to a kid who needs help. a kid needs to learn, a kid neeeds love and guidance to know what's right and wrong. They only gave her fear and left her alone all by herself, that's not how you raise properly a kid.
You can describe it like that, but she has filipino parents, and filipino parents are mostly like that. I can relate to Den because my dad is like that too.
I remember when I got the silent treatment bc I poured out baking soda out in the fridge but when I asked for chips ahoy cookies she had to answer long story short I got brownies so 😒
idk if i should agree or not bc on one hand WTF I WANT COOKIES but on the other hand your a bit ungratful cuz like every one loves brownies your luky you even ot anything my parents wiuld never casually give me brownies lol
I hope you received councilling or therapy for all this, because what you've described is abusive as far as your parents' behavior is concerned. It just makes me want to give you the biggest hug I can.
Sad to say, but she likely hasn't. A lot of Asians (mostly in South, East, and Southeast Asia; but also the Middle East) experience similar things, but mostly think of it as "normal parenting" (tho thankfully, she acknowledges that what she went through is abusive). The majority are slightly better off than her in some respects (specifically in terms of parenting experience), but there are sadly way worse cases. The only ones that really get any treatment (from the government, mostly; if available) are kids who experience things that _everyone_ would consider abuse like using a big long piece of wood to hit them, putting their kid in a sack, smashing alcohol bottles on the floor, forcing them to do hard labor, sexual abuse, etc. As "rare" as those may be, they happen way too often. The bar for what counts as abuse is *_way_* too high here. Her parents probably don't even consider most of what they did as abuse (minus certain things her father did, especially since paternal abuse has been getting more attention in recent years).
THERAPY??? bro this is NORMAL in asian households, if you dared to say to your parents that you need therapy you’d be guilt-tripped and called spoiled 😂
@@Arscne Which is honestly sad. Both the fact that it's normal in Asian households and the fact that therapy is hard to get here. That fact that a huge portion of our continent is so poor that certain things that _should_ be normal are considered "spoiling" says a lot. If the developing countries here in Asia are like this, imagine the situation in underdeveloped countries...
The fact that you couldn't go out, get yelled at that badly, getting your personal belongings destroyed and in general being so constricted it's straight up abuse. I hope you had been seeing a psychologist about this.
Den: "y'know, tough love." Den, I think you mean an abusive household. (Edit: put "semi-abusive" before, but changed it because it's just plain emotional child abuse)
0:58 same, my father tend to be very comprensive and funny but when he gets angry I'm scared of him, especially taking in consideration he's a military
@@LILILILILIAN7125 Get help. Now. Don't wait. Take control of the situation while you still can. Talk to someone who can help you, like a teacher, therapist, friend, the police, a lawyer, someone, anyone.
@@sebastiantschatordai I don't think I have to do that, yet He's scary but my dad hasn't physically hurt me yet As long as that's the case, I have everything under fairly good control (Still, I'm always ready if it ever comes to that)
I think the father just wanted her daughter to be very abled in being able to protect themselves, me and my father Often spar, even got a few teeth punched out when they we're loose, he's got a few anger issues him self, but he's an amazing father nonetheless.
@@andycandy4833 No no, trust me I've given him a fair share of pain two, we just fight pretty roughly do loose teeth we're just at risk. Trust me I have had an awesome childhood.
@@ProfessorGoogly Bee Elliott I understand that her dad wanted her to know how to defend herself, my dad encourage me to defend myself every single time someone wanted to hurt me. But breaking your kids stuff when you are mad at them, not talking to them for weeks, not letting your kid go out with other friends even once, and just being so agressive all the time making your kids so scared of you that they choose to not tell you if something is wrong out of fear you are going to get mad, It's not love. Her dad didn't want to be like his dad, but he end up being just like him in a way, the only difference is that he didn't hit them.
Renamation you can’t put a whole school in therapy and it’s VERY normal in my country. The only thing you can do is not do it yourself. You think a country full of adults who always think they are right are going to listen to “stupid kids” we can’t do anything.
@@turtlezcatz1651 probably not. And I understand, that only the next generation can make a difference when they learn to treat their kids different, but...its still bad. Thats just...all I wanted to say.
So...your when ur parents were angry with you, they’d either break ur things or ignore you?? Mmm no offense but both those things are childish/ unhealthy and I mean pray to god y’all find some therapy
For all his faults, the way you describe your dad makes him sound kinda cool. Scary and definitely NOT the dad I would have wanted, but has that heart of gold buried beneath all that concrete. It is SO sweet to hear that the dad and boyfriend eventually got along. Seeing that the boyfriend was sticking around for good probably helped their relationship a lot.
Den, considering your luck with creepy people, it's probably a good thing he didn't let you go anywhere.. Edit: This is a joke, don't take it that seriously XD
I understand that they’re “trying to protect her”but litteraly forbidding her from ever going out is wrong.they should let her go outside and trust she is independent enough to take care of herself so she could be more capable of handling tough situations
That’s not strict, that’s actual abuse. Extreme emotional and mental abuse. Which is just as bad as physical abuse. I can understand your dad not wanting to be like his, but he did the same things just to what you cared about. Which shows a lack of care and consideration for your feelings. Same for your mother who clearly prioritized how she felt over how her actions affected your brain. Sorry to say but that’s bad parenting and I’m sorry you were raised as a prisoner in an abusive household and made to feel like that was ok. It’s not in any sense of the way.
While I wouldn't say my mom was overprotective, but she was always jumping to conclusions on what I was doing , and that kinda sort of became a problem as I got older.
Nathaniel Foga oh hey man!! Also I’m kinda glad my parents are nice. Even if they don’t really get along sometimes.. yes they’re divorced but they’ve been for most of my life so I’m just used to it. My dad isn’t perfect but we’re still better than what we used to be. 👨👩👧💙💖
Living with an overtly paranoid parent can be a problem... (ahem) ESPECIALLY when you start growing up... I'll never forget the night my mom thought my brother and I were plotting in the bedroom or something... and she sneaks up to the doorway, and demands, "What are you doing in there???" To which my brother responded (almost proudly), "I'm playing with my dick! Do ya mind?!?" ;o)
Your dad reminds me a little of my father. Insanely overprotective, but also aggressive. He would never hit my mom or my sister or myself, but he had such a bad temper that when he felt he couldn't hold it in, he'd go out somewhere (usually to a bar) to pick a fight with someone. And he usually won. My mom would be up the next morning, trying to get the blood stains out of Dad's white shirts.
This story did not go in the direction I thought it was going. I approve of your dad for trying to break free from an abusive cycle and actually becoming friends with your boyfriend...but the anger issues and destroying your loved one's properties is still -iffy. If you're gonna destroy something, destroy your own stuff not your child's. Still, I'm glad you're on good terms with both your parents and still got to see your bf during that time. I respect that. And this video is a very good example as to why parents really need to teach their kids to cook, clean, do laundry, etc., before they move out. So you don't get random phone calls asking, how to cook rice?
All these crazy parents stories makes me think my parents are angels, sure they have some anger issues but they’ve never destroyed the house. If they got angry they’d usually be joking with us by the end of the day lol.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
Asian parents be like : no boyfriend till you get married
Not even Asian but I relate
Fax hahahahahaha
Bwahahaha
Wa... wai... wait...
WUT?
Heehee changed it so no one will ever know
This made me uncomfortable, the light hearted tone mixed with memories of abuse just kinda sent chills down my spine.
Me too! I would not allow this girl thinking this is okay for her parents to do this to her! You know if SuperNanny had these people on the show she would definitely come down hard on the parents
Omg same. None of this is okay or should be trivialised. That was abuse, not just being strict.
To be honest it kind of seemed like she exaggerated the bad parts to make jokes about those situations and to highlight how things had changed. Like yeah it had its bad parts but ignoring her parents changed to an extend is also unfair. Parents are human too and we barely know anything about them really to make that judgement.
Same:(
I'm late but why is this abuse ? o.o my parents are the same actually they don't allow having bf until college and even in college still no.... XD
Parents be like "we do this 'cause we love you" when in reallity they end up hurting you even worse when adulthood comes by.
Exactly!!!
"we do this 'cause we love you" my a**! Parents lie when say that after what they do to you!
My parents : "We do it because we love you"
me : ....is that why you hit me.
My parents : Shut up your grounded!
Me : :')
My child will never live a toxic life like this. *sob sob* 😔
Exactly and as well as agreed and true
Dad: borderline abusive
Den: he was the type of dad to wear sunglasses indoors
Is abusive
What she lived through was abuse.
@@LinnieAlexis nop, we Asian like that, parents have hard laws
She's father love her because that doing that
If you live here then you will understand she have very good father
@@kuroihana3228 just because it's out of love doesn't mean it's good. Those parenting strategies are very toxic and harmful and would be considered emotional abuse.
@@kuroihana3228 Culture doesn't make it right. Breaking your children's stuff because of anger is abuse. It's not normal or ok whether you this is common or not.
Psychologists say that a parent who gives the silent treatment for especially long periods of time actually emotionally scar their children...
Sending love to you girl❤
@@luisacorralmtz9169 They get a dash of physical scars, a drop of emotional trauma and a pinch of low self-esteem.
@@hestiadumont725 what did he comment?
@@bellatrixlestrange1602 I don't remember, that was two months ago
@@bellatrixlestrange1602 HOLD UP... ARE YOU FROM THE CURSED CHILD BOOK?!
I think that what a lot of people (including me) need to understand is that even though you know your parents love you and want to protect you that doesn’t mean they can’t be abusive in some ways.
CinderStar my parents hate me
I’m not a therapist, but if you feel they hate you then that’s a different kind of abuse and you should go to someone about it. I really wish the best for you!
Exatcly
@@redfangoffireclan3049 oh. Well then work hard and run somewhere faaaarr away.
Yeah... I’m pretty sure even if your parents are trying to protect you, if you get abused in any way you should talk it out with your parents or see a counsellor or therapist
*Choose your weapon*
Parents: Grabs any household item
YoiNk
shovel
Reminds me of Tabbes' vid
Rigor Berzerk agreed
Soo true that it hurts 😂
Parents: *have a child* let's name her Denise!
Parents: *has another child* lets name her... Denise?
Parents: *has a child 3: again* Denise
Ice Cube is fat reply
Wtf are the grammar in sentence comments
@@laraduraes4968 tbh I'm not sure
@@laraduraes4968 ice cube is fat reply
This just popped up in my recommends, but I genuinely hope you’re seeing a therapist. You’re parents aren’t “overbearing”. That’s abuse. Neglect and destruction of property in fits of anger to make you feel both imprisoned and insecure in your own environment is abuse. And it’s kinda wild hearing it discussed so nonchalantly. 😳
Hi
Den's probably so nonchalant about it because she might lack an outside perspective on her situation. You know how a lot of abusers will do things to isolate the victim (keep them away from friends or family, destroy relationships, KEEPING THEM INSIDE THEIR WHOLE LIFE)? It's to normalize the situation in the victim's head because, without an outside person looking in to tell her this isn't okay behavior, the situation seems normal.
As such, this is her normal, so why make a big deal about it?
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother.
Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
Imagine your parents being more of a child than their children.
Uni Mal lolololololololololololololololololol
LOL I TELL THEM YOUR NOT A CHILD LOL
imagine having your parents hate you because you’re 12 and mess shit up and get grounded because of asking for something you want and have a iphone 5 that crashes and they get mad at me for no reason✌️
crayon samitch sounds like my family
Caitlin Coy same
The best argument to is no boys until your 50 is "good luck seeing your grandkids graduate then"
Asian parents: you need to be home by 6pm
Me: but I end school at 6pm
Asian Parents: Make it happen.
Wtf?
This was not even a joke for me it was real haha
I finished classes at 6pm when I was in highschool and nightfall was at 5-6 pm during winter.
And my dad was often angry at me because "it's dangerous when you walk in the streets during night you have to come back to home before nightfall" - -'
Time to *tElEpOrT*
xDD
that can happen to any kid, any parent can do that its not always asian parents?
They just want excuses to enact their sadistic desires while remaining "righteous" so they can pretend they're the wonderful people they're NOT.
It's human nature.
I’m not sure she is even aware that she got emotionally abused her entire child/teenage/young adulthood. She talks about it in such an innocent tone. It’s honestly really sad. It may not be physical (punching, belts, etc.) but it’s still soulless.
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother.
Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
Eh, we could have a conversation with the mom but with the dad, I think something we need to remember is how hard it is to break the cycle of abuse. The fact that he had the restraint to not repeat his father's actions is commendable. He may not be perfect, but it's not fair to expect that.
My mother was an abuse victim. She did everything in her power not to pass that on, but yes, she still got angry, she yelled a lot, she had a habit of not listening. And those were definitely frustrating, but I don't think it's fair to call that abuse in her context. She broke the abuse cycle, and her children can take the next step and be even better to their kids. Same here. He broke the cycle, not perfectly bur he broke it. Den can take the next step to not do the things he did to her to her kids. I don't think it's fair to not be understanding here.
I agree with both of you on this one because although parents can get mad ,they also mean well and don't mean to upset you in a way that you stop talking to them. But there can also be parents who abuse you just because they wanted to
Dad: "NO BOYFRIEND!!!! NUN, NO NEVER!!!"
Me:...So I'm dating this girl.
dad : tell me more
Dad:oh same here
loophole lmao
LOOOOOOOOOOL
And that right there is called a pro gamer move
Den I think you should read some self help books on abuse. Abuse can come in different shapes and sizes. Not all abuse is the same and in most cases the victim will blame themselves or cover for the abuse and think of it as tough love. I'm not saying your parents are bad, but understanding why and how can help a lot in many ways. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I really like your channel :3
I feel like this is a good point, but coming from someone who got hit by both parents quite a bit in childhood, and someone who’s mom is great at insulting me and my sibling: I feel like there are bigger topics we should cover and fix first. i entirely agree with you that cypher is/was having a pretty bad time, and if she actually has anxiety or something else as an affect of that, she should get some help. but i have a couple friends who have a much worse life than me. much worse kinds of abuse. not limited to abandonment and using any tool to beat them harder than i ever got. so . just my point is.. we can try to focus on other more important subjects. but this comment is pretty helpful.
@Giffysoul - exactly
It's called every Asian parent ever.
Noodle Its literally every Asian parent ever 😂😂 don’t worry we’re used to it
I agree
It’s probably very very unhealthy to live in a house where if you make the slightest mistake your parents will make you fear for your belongings or if they will even put food on your table.
And forcing a young kid to break in her knuckles, also very inappropriate behavior for a parent
And any comments, do not even try to defend it by saying there Asian, that doesn’t excuse any of their actions
Dads of daughters: “No boyfriends, ever!”
Also those same dads when their daughter is still single with no kids by 35: “Planning on starting a family soon?”
General vibe that I got from the thumbnail
Den's parents : "Please, we're keeping you home cause we love you!"
Den : " If you love me let me gooooooo!!!"
No
YESSS
Did you watch the Eeveeloution Squad?
Omg-.
YES CHILD
i laughed. thank you.
Filipino mom: YOU'RE GROUNDED
"Hours later"
Mom:go out and buy me a SOY SAUCE
Cause they cant live without you
Meh my moms not like that but funny though
@@eliiuu9597 it's filipino
I would say straight up, *BUY.* *UR.* *SELF.*
Tara Bondad Eyas oki i’m not good at geography
im amazed how immature adults can be, especially when it comes handling arguments
(alot of people have parents like this)
Tell me about it one time I got in an argument with my parents which in my case I was winning and all of a sudden my parents thought it was disrespect and grounded me 😌
Not really i love my parents and they have amazing tactics to make sure that I play by his rule. But yeah some tactics may or may not backfire like my parents unknowingly gave me phobias and this video is a prime example of this. Not saying your view is wrong but it's just my view on the situation.
My little sister was crying (3 yrs old) she couldn't say what she wanted so my mom and her stupid favorite db child was like shouting at my 3yo sister "WHAT DO YOU WANT!? " "ughh JUST SAY WHAT YOU WANT AND SHUT UP" which made her cry more and more and it was hella loud so my sleep was disturbed
I was so annoyed I told them shouting at her won't make her talk nor make y'all understand what she wants
Soooo my mom talked to her calmly but I couldn't go back to sleep
@@duxkie_speedpaints8097 its the worst when THEY TELL YOU TO ''StOp cRyInG'' LIKE YOU CONTROL IT THEY JUST MAE IT WORST BY BEING RUDE AND BLAMING THE FISHING VICTIM
You know, a bird learns how to fly from their parents. If a parent is unable to teach their child how to survive the outside world, they've failed as parents. Your parents meant well, but their behavior sort of...screwed you over? I'm glad you're keeping it on the chin and that you have a great relationship with your parents now, but if it were me I wouldn't want anything to do with them. X'D
Dad: No boyfriend
Me: ok
*Gets a girlfriend*
Dad: Surprised Pikachu face
lol same hahahaha
That would've been funny if that was what happened.
They got bamboozled lol
Superpokefan1244
**me introducing my girlfriend to my dad**
Dad: *blinks*
Ahhahaha
My dad's childhood was terrifying. He has 6 siblings and his dad when he got mad he would lock him in the basement too until morning. One day my dad was walking to the garden and his father was on the roof and jumped in front of him with a knife. He did that also to my uncles and aunts. Rn he has pills and he's not doing that anymore, thanks for listening my story
Kaylee Tang yeah he is but now he’s perfectly normal and stuff
:(
:(
Jesus, your kidding right?
Well that is terrifying
Jeez.
That's not a healthy family relationship. Textbook definition of creating trust issues with your kids.
Don't do what her parents did
I agree 100%. Speaking from personal experience within my own family, don't allow physical/mental abuse to take over your household, regardless of whether you are a parent or child.
This is how my family operates. Now I'm in therapy because of emotional abuse lol
@Edie Rose yes but I feel like it crossed the line into emotional abuse. I understand the intention but it's just a very unhealthy way to treat your daughter
yesh. plz dont.
I wish I could say the same with my dad.
ok i feel straight up BAD for this girl. just right now,imagine your own father screaming at you,being extremely angry,you holding a toy, tears rolling down your face,him taking your toy and crushing it,and then when you tell your mom, she will get ,mad at you for not standing up for yourself and not talk to you for 21 days!!!
and she is saying they are "tough" parents? MORE LIKE ABUSIVE!!THATS LITTERALLY ABUSE TO SCREAM AT YOU KID AND WRECK YOU STUFF AND TO NOT TALK TO YOUR KID FOR WEEKS!! THATS AS BAD AS NOT GIVING YOUR KID FOOD!!!!
The word "parent" should MEAN, something, any snarling animal can hump eachother.
Unfortunately most people aren't fortunate enough to be born with PARENTS most people are stuck with TESTICLES and a WOMB
They gave food to her. And also she said she has a great relationship with her parents now so that means that whatever happened then she has forgiven and moved on (maybe) I know what abuse is and that’s not it.
*Share My Story:* My Dad Hates My Boyfriend
*ACTUALLY HAPPENED:* My Parents Hated My Boyfriend But He Changed Everything
*CypherDen:* My Dad Hated My Boyfriend
*Batman:* _ERROR 404: Parents not Found_
Yes
What about storybooth
Duchi wow
Chibuzo Okoli STORY BOTH SUCKS
Hotel: Trivago
Honestly this video was hard to get through because the household she grew up in was abusive. It was just abusive in a different way.
yeah
@KAYLEE SAW ZI YAN well then asians are really weird. Maybe that's harsh but no wonder that the suicide rate is so high in Asian countries
Her household is every household from afrika to asia
An abusive father is a dad who uses his children/wife to blow some steam
A restricted father is a person who put too much rules on his children/wife and it usually done for the sake of protecting them (regardless of weather it's the right way or not)
Her grandfather abused her father, but her father really restricted her childhood. They are two separate things
@KAYLEE SAW ZI YAN uh....having a fit because your child struggles to comprehend something and punishing them for it _is abusive._ you guys just think that's normal. It's not an assumption either considering the main people you hear talking about how strict asian parents are _are asian kids._
We aren't being rude and making things up, we're going based off of what we've been told by what could be called a reliable source.
Parents : no boyfriends till you’re 21!!!!
Also parents: proceeds to talk about high school love story
Family: hey I know you're 20 but... Can I have a grandbaby?
lMaO
Oh god, this all sounds waaaaaaaay too familiar. My dad used to break things, scream, threaten, insult, and just overall throw tantrums. That stressed my mom out and so she became more emotionally distant and snappy. They were extremely overprotective too, to the point of making me keep a GPS tracker on my phone until 21. It’s okay to love your parents and I’m glad they’ve improved, but please don’t think that behavior was okay, you definitely didn’t deserve it. Trust me, I rationalized it too for a loooong time until I finally said no more and set boundaries. Of course they’re angry about the boundaries, but honestly they’ll get over it. You definitely deserved way better then that, no kid deserves to go through that. Sending good vibes
I don’t know if you’re married now, but good luck to you if your father threatened to kill your husband or your wife.
Boy: introduces GF
Dad: introduces himself nicely
Girl: introduces BF
Dad: INNER DEMONS AWAKENS
Lol
True that lmao
Bitch that aint true
Am I the only one who finds that blatantly sexist? Like girls aren't some fragile porcealine dolls who need constant protection. And the idea that they need there "innocence" protected is so ignorant to how people actually are
@@omk573 not really dads are just little protective..
**Reads title**
_WOW, that is _*_RELATABLE!_*
Ha a sr pelo reference
^ Most Asian kids be like 😂😂😂
Lel a Sr. Pelo refference
I read this in Pelo’s voice
😔 joke getting dry
Take Tabbes story for example. Father abused Dad and Dad goes on breaking stuff of Tabbed. Cards and gameboy etc...
Yea but Tabbes realised it was abuse. And her father realised it was a mistake in the end, when Den's parents probabli treat jer sisters now the same
I’m not Asian but like this is pretty harsh
Didn't Tabbes say she got her ass kicked as well.
Then do you know if your parents don’t talk to you for a week it’s called abusive parenting
No
It's called ASIAN parenting
@@bruhguy1636 So dose that have the right for parents to treat their kids like this? Because their “Asian”? Like, I don’t care if you or your parents come from Pluto! This is indeed toxic parenting! I do NOT wanna allow people thinking that this type of parenting is normal!
@@VioletFeatherWind Well actually, it really depends on the parents and the place, condition, culture, and time they lived through, not all asian parents are that strict, i knew some who were pretty laid back actually. Some may beat you physically or just give you verbal beatdowns but some are doing it because it's the only way they knew how to give discipline, they usually reconcile with you afterwards, for my experience, my family has a rule that mostly works 99% if done properly which is Take care of them(usually spoiling them) until the age of 4-6, Then afterwards be strict to them until middle to late teenhood(during which you can teach them valuable things) then after that, start to lighten your grasp around them but still advicing them. Asian parenting are only grouped into one category because they are highlighted on the strict and beating stereotype but you can usually find this all over the world like the Latin and Hispanics, Africans, Middle Easterns and so on
Isn't that called neglective parenting
@@spikedragonym331 I dunno i saw some that would still take care of them as normal like cook them food ready up their things the only difference is that they talk less to them, you could say it's a tsundere like behavior
I really hope your parents aren't still raising any of your siblings. Going so far as to not talk to your child for three weeks is easily considered neglect. You don't ghost your own kid.
lmao my mom does the same thing too tho .. so “you don’t ghost your own kids” . it wasn’t just den’s case, pretty sure many have experienced
Her mom was much worst then her Dad.
@@randomcat7246 just because it MIGHT be a common experience doesnt mean its okay.
AtomicCryptonite -never said it was ok
If they are I bet they named Dennise
Cypher... I'm only 2 min into the video but I have to say this. Your father didn't break the cycle of abuse. He just emotionally abused you instead of physically abused you. Growing up in fear is not okay and having your possessions destroyed is not discipline. My father only laid his hands on me twice but that doesn't mean he didn't constantly abuse me. I... Just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone and it doesn't mean your dad is a bad person but his behavior towards you, how he didn't handle his anger, that wasn't okay. *Hugs*
I was about to comment this. Also, silent treatments she got from her mom are type of emotional abuse as well
I was thinking the same thing too...A parent breaking your things and hitting stuff is not okay...I don't know her dad and I'm sure she loves him and he tried his best. In a way he broke the cycle by not physically abusing them, which is great, but he found another, still unhealthy, way to release his anger :/
It’s also sad how she was scared to make it home late when it was out of her control. She shouldn’t be so scared like that, it’s a bit sad
Don’t visit Dominican Republic
And let's not forget that she wasn't allowed to do ANYTHING. She couldn't even meet her friends...
Don't all dads hate their daughter's boyfriends? Lol
That's why I'm gay.
Just Some Guy without a Mustache
Good thing I’m a lesbian
And that is the second reason why I am single
I'm bisexual.
AmazingStickManIdiots Ren
Ayeee we made the same joke *high five*
silent treatment is classified as emotional abuse, im happy that it didnt affect u and ur good with ur parents
CypherDen's dad: "I don't wanna be like that bastard I'm supposed to call my dad."
Also CypherDen's dad: "You want to go outside and actually have a life? REEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"
Dad: NO BOYFRIEND!!!!!!
Daughter:Gets Girlfriend
Dad:What the frick am I sopposed to say
lol
Me: secretly texts cute person
Dad: takes phone
Them: fights them in text
Me: fffffff-
Oof
I think you’d get disowned for that, if you’re in a very religious family.
This makes no sensr
this reminds me of that one fake text
girl: Mom im pregnant!!
mom: WHAT? YOURE SIXTEEN UR GROUNDED
girl:MOM YOUR 14 YEARS OLDER THAN ME
mom: ...
30?that's kinda young
Oop-
like daughter like mother
😐😑🖤
@@johannewheeler559 10:11 what did she say
Other parents: I'm sorry for invading your privacy by using your phone without permission
my parents: *WDYM ITS YOUR PHONE I BOUGHT IT AND NOTHING IS YOURS UNTIL YOU TURN 24*
I bought my phone they still went thru it😕
CypherDen : " I don't get out much."
Georgie : " 🎶🎵 I can show you the world!🎵🎶"
CypherDen : " I can show you my driveway!🎶🎵"
lol
😂 haha
Thomas Sanders Vine? Lol
I felt like this happened at least twice
Heck I feel really bad for Den..
Her mothers extremely toxic for flat out ignoring her for weeks over literally nothing, and her dads anger issues created an emotional abuse cycle. That wasn't "tough love" or an "*insert nationality* family" that was two parents who needed a kick in the butt and some good old fashioned therapy. It sucks she can't really bring herself to see it, a lot of people can't, I mean why are so many people still in toxic relationships? They just can't bring their self to see that what the person they love is doing something so bad as abuse.
I'm glad she's finally more away from that but it's also bad that she doesn't know how to function in life because she was denied a childhood to learn things.
lmao,my parents did the exact same thing while I was growing up. I realize some petiole are stronger physically/mentally when it comes to stuff like this.Depending on how bad the situation is.I feel as though mine were just strict.If they broke something that they gave to me, they bought it so really they wasted their money.I never got treated indifferent or badly but I will say that because of the way my dad and mom raised me,I feel better as a person today
yeah, it seems like she's on good terms with them now, so hopefully they realized the error of their ways and apologized but yeah, I think keeping a good distance is best and if she and George have kids, they'll know not to treat their kids the same way
Exactly this 100% this isn't "strict" this is emotional and manipulative abuse by people who need therapy to sort through their own adult issues. Taking it out on your kids for not solving your own trauma is not right.
That's... That's straight up abuse and it's kind of scary that your mom told you to keep your boyfriend a secret from your dad.
This is exactly the way my ex girlfriends parents behaved
I've always hated them...
Really shitty parenting
She is the sweeter version of tabbes😂
Edit: yo this has way too many likes XD
ikr
Yes😋
Ikr
Ikr 😂😂
True 😂
Uhhh, sorry, but this video was just depressing. The happy and comedic visuals didn't win me over, but you sure tried your damndest, Den, so props for that.
Other than that, I'm glad that you've grown into a socially functional person.
@rafael Perez Urbina It's unfortunate that I can only reply with something so...neutral?
We don't know Den's life. Maybe the parents once pulled her aside at one time and basically said, "Yeah, we F'd up. Let's talk through this as a family." or something.
Personally, I'd like to just assume that Den's a happy individual and leave it at that. It's not fair to assume or theorize and so on about one person who would prefer not to have other people do that.
Oliver, Michael . I actually was one of those kids that was hit in childhood and had the never ending high standards of asian mom. but i function as a normal human. i interact with people, laugh at jokes, i can easily do all that. i do have trauma (not really from that, it was something else that had do with a near death of my brother) but i think back on it sometimes and i feel pain, but i still work like a normal human. if you’re being affected by something bad i suggest therapy? we don’t know aswell, maybe den had some time to get help if she needed it.
@@randomcat7246 Yeah, also her parents did change
Oliver, Michael I was thinking the same. No matter how much jokes she made I felt like this little feeling in my stomach?
@@safirykat839 That doesn't erase the abuse.
Me:(sits besides a male who looks like my age and a complete stranger)
Dad: "DON'T TOUCH MY CHILD"
I just realized that she's married now. 🤔😂👰🤵
Apperenlty, she married her High school crush.
A RUclipsr Commenting On videos Wait a minute- She is?
@@gastii6613 yup
@@Cupcake_Royale
Oh
OH
Wait really how u knowww tell me
@@chipweirdo5306 #Internet
Nothing like a quirky animation to get over your childhood abuse.
This is just plain abusive, it may not be phyiscal abuse but it MENTAL abusive I’m actually surprised ur not traumatized or anything but hey you’ve grown into a pretty great person.
Edit: I’ve seen some people say that’s this is just Asian culture and well I’m Asian too and I personally disagree, I grew up in a kinda abusive home, my dad use to beat my mom, I would get hit a lot even tho I was only 6, IN FACT my dad when he ever got mad WOULD BREAK STUFF IN THE HOUSE, my parents would constantly get into fights AND SCREAM in the house. To me that’s abusive, but now it’s okay everyone’s is chill and cool with each other. I think what Denise’s parent did to her was a bit overboard, like cmon your kid does something wrong u teach them what they did wrong then help then make sure they don’t make that mistake again u don’t IGNORE them for WEEKS, whenever u get MAD u don’t break stuff in the house that’s just wrong. I also think it’s wrong that her parents sheltered her like that, sure the world is scary BUT EVERYTHING IS SCARY u don’t hide from ur fears U FACE THEM AND GET OVER THEM, my parents never did anything like that to me in fact they wanted me to do extra curriculums activities. But that’s just my opinion
She IS traumatized. That's why these stories idpf abuse thinly described as "funny stories" dominate her videos. Through her art she is letting out the pain. It's a form of self-therapy. Personally I think she could use some professional help working out her trauma as well....
Fice Gaming i mean true... but a lot of ethic parents who had us around their 30s or later, and were raised in a different country, aaand were also raised similar when they were young, that’s just the way they knew, or thought they should raise us. Also them having us at an older age meant that they wouldn’t understand our generation a lot more and they’re raising kid in a whole new country where we, born here, learn American culture and the freedom our friends have. Basically they didn’t know what to do and just wanted to have control over us to make sure we just stay alive and don’t get “bad influences”.
This is really close to my life
It’s not exactly abuse. The world is not safe at all especially when you’re a different race (and I’m not being racist).
Fice Gaming I was verbally abused for most of my childhood so I couldn’t talk for a while so I didn’t know and to this day I can’t really tell what is abusive except for physical abuse
Your animation is really good. I learn a lot from watching your videos to improve my animation!!!
I accidentally read the title as “My Dad DATED My Boyfriend”
Oh boy
Sounds like an ACTUALLY HAPPENED video...
Mee too
Butt Us anna Oop
😂😂😂😂
Looking at the comments, I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one to see that this is abuse. My family has a similar story that is still going on. my great grandma was severely abused by her mother (one time her mother slammed a car door on her legs because she was taking too long to get out of the car), and the next generation, my great grandma wasn't physically abusive towards my grandma, but it was hard to know for my grandma, if her mom really loved her, because my great grandma was scared to make connections with her children and possibly be a repeat of what happened to her. Cut to when my mom was born, and my grandma didn't have a good mother to base how to raise her children off of, so she was so loose on her kids that she wasn't surprised when some of my uncles came home with the police (they were being too rody most of the time, nothing too serious, but not good either). Now it's me and my mom. My mom wants to be a good mother, and she has a good base, but she can be emotionally abusive. I won't go into details, because it hurts, but I really want to be close to my mom, but she won't even admit that she has a problem and seek help. And you already know that ya girl won't say anything because I don't want to hurt my mom's feelings, or get yelled at. Parents out there: keep yourselves in check. Be 100% brutally honest with yourselves and maybe create a way for your children to call you out on things you're doing wrong without being scared, because, as much as it may hurt now, it will hurt a whole lot more if your children cut you out for good because you never knew how emotionally abusive you were being.
What strict parents think they teach: Good morals. How to be smart. How to not have any kids till your mid 20s.
What they actually teach: How to hear when a parent is about to barge into your room. How to fake things like grades. How to be an excellent liar.
my life in a nutshell
Holy shit why is this so me💀✋
Den's Dad: Gets angry and breaks her things, won't let her COOK, and won't let her go out, gets pissed at the mention if boys
Den's Mom: When she's mad at her daughter, she INGORES HER for weeks at a time, also won't go out.
Both: Get mad at her about not knowing how to cook rice AND WON'T TALK TO HER FOR A MONTH bc her dad never let her cook.
Den: hAhA FuNnY sToRy AbOuT mY fAmIlY, nOt aBuSiVe At aLl. ThEy LoVe Me AnD iT's
*Q U I R K Y*
Seriously, her parents are messed up. I know it might be hard for her to tell because she didn't get out enough to know, but her parents are most likely mentally abusive
Agreed
Yup
I agree, it’s super messed up
Also why name your 3 girls the exact same name
It’s like they born to be terrible parents
Agreed she should read your comment
Definitely
This is one of the rarest times I feel so relatable, I went through everything literally everything you mentioned but just .....worst type of thing....
I hope your better off now.
129das things are better now thank you for caring!
I feel you. I'm glad things are better now!!
I feel bad for you good luck
imagine having the homeless guy that pees on your window as your only friend tho like just having a conversation about how you parents are strict while they try to comfort you
*Dad: your gonna drown
Den: it’s up to my waist
Mom: *pretends to drown*
Yo, Cipher.... Your dad only switched from physical to emotional abuse
That's every filipino family
It really is the summary of a Filipino family
Her family being 'Filipino' isn't an excuse for them treating her that way.
@XVII There's nothing normal about abuse..
@@octovia2658 no it isn't, but unfortunately it's too common.
Den: Teaching me how to punch walls until my knuckles broke
Me: SHE IS THE NEXT DEKU-
Lol 😂
oh
lmao
My brother began watching My Hero Academia and because of that I get that reference.
shes JoJo now
Den: **Gets a boyfriend**
Den's dad: _kaya pinili mo ang kamatayan..._
?
@@aleahknight334 tagalog to english: so you have chosen death😡
. . . They named all 3 of you the same name?
im sorry, not tryin to be rood, but WOT?
That's what I'm wondering too tbh
Not tryin to be rood😂
I once heard from people I know about a man who named his sons 'John', although they were different variations of the name, like 'Johnny' and such.
Kinda funny picturing the face of whomever needs to read their IDs at the same time..
Is it a cultural thing or ??? Cause otherwise whhyyy???
Dad- *doesnt want to be like his dad*
Also dad- *is his dad in some ways*
Parents- *NAMES ALL 3 CHILDREN DENISE?*
Edit: yeah guys this was only I joke, I know that when you have an abusive parent, being raised by them could lead to you having some of their qualities and life styles, this comment was only something to make people laugh.
*all three sisters are called Denise
Names all children
I mean if you have an abusive parent there's a high chance you're gonna pick up some stuff from them because of how you were raised. I know a guy who's grandpa was very abusive and the guy's dad picked up a little bit of that stuff but the guy I know now is cool and he's not abusive in the slightest.
Dennise-
well yeah abuse can cause mental issues that can lead to more abuse despite not wanting to add to it.
Dad: no boy friends
Me, a bisexual: _alright_
Noice
*XD* YOUR *DAD* BE *CONFUSED*
Sunny Girl your dad bi confused😏
møøn_ børing YOUR DAS BI CONFUSED*😏
Sunny Girl Olivia duffin could never
Wow I didn't know there were alot of Filipino animators out there and I also experienced what your dad experienced from his dad it's just so depressing
Your parents are kids... They should not be parents..
And the fact you and your sister are called the same makes me think they need a Psy
Well incase you haven't noticed they're fine now
@@weeniehutjrs8822 I'm not insulting them I just think it's not healthy to think of this as "Though love" because is abusive parenting.They are not tryint to take care of her, they are being very bad parents and it's bad for people to see that as "love and care"
I don't think it as bad as all that.
@@Thefoxthatbecameawolf I don't see this abusive in any way...
Am I the only one?
@@angrycat8894 I will just sya this:
1- Instead of teaching her how to talk and solve problems, her mother would ignore her. That's not how you deal with a kid who is only learnign how to cope with life
2- Her dad would have violent outbursts in front of her to the point when she was afraid of him. Even if he didn't hurt HER he destroy things that where valuable to her and show her that's the "right" way to deal with your anger: by having out burts, because a kid do what his parents do.
3- They did not allow her to have a normal social life and develop the skills she needed to survive in this world, they kept her locked away, is that true life? We all got rules and limits but not allowing her to have friends is a bit too much
4-She was afraid of talking to her parents, that proves the point that she could not be a normal kid, any good parent should be a confident to a kid who needs help.
a kid needs to learn, a kid neeeds love and guidance to know what's right and wrong. They only gave her fear and left her alone all by herself, that's not how you raise properly a kid.
Wait you have the same name as your sisters?
6:52
Please elaborate;-;
ʕ⁎̯͡⁎ʔ༄IZZYS EDITS .•.•.• maybe a step sister?
straxberry_ milkk when you really like that one name
c h e c k n e w v i d e o l o l
I d i d l o l ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Lizzieloves 118 she made a vid on it :)
this is plain child abuse.
maybe not physical, but mental abuse.
You can describe it like that, but she has filipino parents, and filipino parents are mostly like that. I can relate to Den because my dad is like that too.
@@jove5459 Abuse is still abuse even if it's become a common thing.
Neon Panda I don’t think so.
Plup Berries if everyone started raping everyone would it be rape?
lol normal daily basis get beaten be mentally and physically abused
I remember when I got the silent treatment bc I poured out baking soda out in the fridge but when I asked for chips ahoy cookies she had to answer long story short I got brownies so 😒
idk if i should agree or not bc on one hand WTF I WANT COOKIES but on the other hand your a bit ungratful cuz like every one loves brownies your luky you even ot anything my parents wiuld never casually give me brownies lol
I hope you received councilling or therapy for all this, because what you've described is abusive as far as your parents' behavior is concerned. It just makes me want to give you the biggest hug I can.
Sad to say, but she likely hasn't. A lot of Asians (mostly in South, East, and Southeast Asia; but also the Middle East) experience similar things, but mostly think of it as "normal parenting" (tho thankfully, she acknowledges that what she went through is abusive). The majority are slightly better off than her in some respects (specifically in terms of parenting experience), but there are sadly way worse cases. The only ones that really get any treatment (from the government, mostly; if available) are kids who experience things that _everyone_ would consider abuse like using a big long piece of wood to hit them, putting their kid in a sack, smashing alcohol bottles on the floor, forcing them to do hard labor, sexual abuse, etc. As "rare" as those may be, they happen way too often. The bar for what counts as abuse is *_way_* too high here. Her parents probably don't even consider most of what they did as abuse (minus certain things her father did, especially since paternal abuse has been getting more attention in recent years).
THERAPY??? bro this is NORMAL in asian households, if you dared to say to your parents that you need therapy you’d be guilt-tripped and called spoiled 😂
@@Arscne Which is honestly sad. Both the fact that it's normal in Asian households and the fact that therapy is hard to get here. That fact that a huge portion of our continent is so poor that certain things that _should_ be normal are considered "spoiling" says a lot. If the developing countries here in Asia are like this, imagine the situation in underdeveloped countries...
You guys are over exaggerating sure this parenting isn't perfect but it's not therapy worthy
Just another day of being Hispanic 🤷🏽♀️
Who's just watching the dog sleeping in the background ? 😂😂😂
:o
The fact that you couldn't go out, get yelled at that badly, getting your personal belongings destroyed and in general being so constricted it's straight up abuse. I hope you had been seeing a psychologist about this.
My father could win an award for being the most protective dad, ( but he’s amazing I’m not complaining😊)
Den: "y'know, tough love."
Den, I think you mean an abusive household.
(Edit: put "semi-abusive" before, but changed it because it's just plain emotional child abuse)
HopelessLion "semi" this is full blown emotional abuse oof
Semi?
@@129das I should probably change semi to just full blown emotion abuse and fear mongering
I think she’s even without realizing it/unknowingly normalizing abuse to her young viewers in this video. (or am I misunderstanding this?)
I feel like families who treats their kids like that should be banned from child support.
Wait. All three of you are named Dennise?
Jess Wolski they wanted a do over :P I’m joking
Check new vid ;)
ruclips.net/video/SM3nw2ZPYws/видео.html
Jess Wolski yeah.... she made a video about that in the future
Jess Wolski yes
0:58 same, my father tend to be very comprensive and funny but when he gets angry I'm scared of him, especially taking in consideration he's a military
Omg me too! It's so scary when my dad gets angry sometimes I'm genuinely afraid for my life! And it's becoming a more regular occurrence lately
same but he's not in the milltary
@@LILILILILIAN7125 Get help. Now. Don't wait. Take control of the situation while you still can. Talk to someone who can help you, like a teacher, therapist, friend, the police, a lawyer, someone, anyone.
The same applies to you, too, Fabrizzio.
@@sebastiantschatordai
I don't think I have to do that, yet
He's scary but my dad hasn't physically hurt me yet
As long as that's the case, I have everything under fairly good control (Still, I'm always ready if it ever comes to that)
"He hated his father" Interesting
That's not "tough love", that's not even close to the word love.
That is straight up abuse.
I think the father just wanted her daughter to be very abled in being able to protect themselves, me and my father Often spar, even got a few teeth punched out when they we're loose, he's got a few anger issues him self, but he's an amazing father nonetheless.
@@ProfessorGoogly yikes. I'm sorry you went through that
@@andycandy4833 No no, trust me I've given him a fair share of pain two, we just fight pretty roughly do loose teeth we're just at risk. Trust me I have had an awesome childhood.
@@ProfessorGoogly Bee Elliott I understand that her dad wanted her to know how to defend herself, my dad encourage me to defend myself every single time someone wanted to hurt me.
But breaking your kids stuff when you are mad at them, not talking to them for weeks, not letting your kid go out with other friends even once, and just being so agressive all the time making your kids so scared of you that they choose to not tell you if something is wrong out of fear you are going to get mad, It's not love.
Her dad didn't want to be like his dad, but he end up being just like him in a way, the only difference is that he didn't hit them.
@@lunam.2832 yep, but maybe he did hit them? Maybe den didn't want to talk about it?
your parents needs to see a therapist.
Considering almost all the kids in my school are hit or treated like den technically it’s normal and they all would call you extreme for saying that
@@turtlezcatz1651 Just because something is considered normal doesnt mean, that its good.
No they need to be put in the mental asylum
*Just kidding but they could use a bit of therapy*
Renamation you can’t put a whole school in therapy and it’s VERY normal in my country. The only thing you can do is not do it yourself. You think a country full of adults who always think they are right are going to listen to “stupid kids” we can’t do anything.
@@turtlezcatz1651 probably not. And I understand, that only the next generation can make a difference when they learn to treat their kids different, but...its still bad. Thats just...all I wanted to say.
So...your when ur parents were angry with you, they’d either break ur things or ignore you?? Mmm no offense but both those things are childish/ unhealthy and I mean pray to god y’all find some therapy
Ikr like holy shit her parents sound fucking horrible. Like i thought my parents were bad holy shit
Yeah, I think they need SuperNanny
Den's parents: "no boy friends aloud"
My parents: "no crush aloud"
BTW I'm a Filipino
For all his faults, the way you describe your dad makes him sound kinda cool.
Scary and definitely NOT the dad I would have wanted, but has that heart of gold buried beneath all that concrete.
It is SO sweet to hear that the dad and boyfriend eventually got along. Seeing that the boyfriend was sticking around for good probably helped their relationship a lot.
"Cypher why u an introvert?"
Cipher: Sit here I'll tell u a story...
Den, considering your luck with creepy people, it's probably a good thing he didn't let you go anywhere..
Edit: This is a joke, don't take it that seriously XD
lol, so true
Yeah, new York is rough.
Fair enough
Not if they had taught her to be more diligent.
I understand that they’re “trying to protect her”but litteraly forbidding her from ever going out is wrong.they should let her go outside and trust she is independent enough to take care of herself so she could be more capable of handling tough situations
That’s not strict, that’s actual abuse. Extreme emotional and mental abuse. Which is just as bad as physical abuse. I can understand your dad not wanting to be like his, but he did the same things just to what you cared about. Which shows a lack of care and consideration for your feelings. Same for your mother who clearly prioritized how she felt over how her actions affected your brain. Sorry to say but that’s bad parenting and I’m sorry you were raised as a prisoner in an abusive household and made to feel like that was ok. It’s not in any sense of the way.
"When my dad gets mad, he turns into the hulk!"
So he turns into a giant green genius, who's nice to everyone?
Teagan Venter 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁
Do you get the reference?
Teagan Venter 𝘆𝗲𝘀 𝗶 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗱 𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗴𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗸𝗲𝘁𝘀 𝗯𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘀𝗼 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗿𝘂𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗹
Teagan Venter right
When you’re Asian and you can’t relate to the “strict asian parents” gang.
Me right here, my parents let me hangout with friends till 12am and they were ok abt it
@@emilymarie6726 W H A T ?!
@@emilymarie6726 *WHAT?* lucky :
Emily Marie Bro same
Bruh yeah
0:11 Did she just uttered "hay naku!" 🤣
Cypher:One time my mom ignored me for three whole weeks
Me:I can’t even ignore my brother for 5 minutes
"HoW aM i SuPpOsEd To kNow iF iT's jUsT gOnNa *bUrN?!* "
-Cypher Den 2k19
I Clicked Immediately And Felt The Need To Comment
i dont care what you think or what anyone thinks THIS.IS.CALLED.ABUSE in every way possible
NeC's nails Shut up pussy
@@LeanInMyBladder i-
I agree. That's just horrible parenting.
people think of ''abuse'' as physical abuse
no lol
@@LeanInMyBladder rude
I just discovered this channel yesterday and the stories are very relatable thats the reason i love it
While I wouldn't say my mom was overprotective, but she was always jumping to conclusions on what I was doing , and that kinda sort of became a problem as I got older.
Nathaniel Foga oh hey man!! Also I’m kinda glad my parents are nice. Even if they don’t really get along sometimes.. yes they’re divorced but they’ve been for most of my life so I’m just used to it. My dad isn’t perfect but we’re still better than what we used to be. 👨👩👧💙💖
Nathaniel Foga oof same here.
Same here
Living with an overtly paranoid parent can be a problem... (ahem) ESPECIALLY when you start growing up...
I'll never forget the night my mom thought my brother and I were plotting in the bedroom or something... and she sneaks up to the doorway, and demands, "What are you doing in there???"
To which my brother responded (almost proudly), "I'm playing with my dick! Do ya mind?!?" ;o)
@@gnarthdarkanen7464 Okay, that's funny. 😁
Dad: No talking to boys
Me: Doesn’t affect me, I’m not straight! HAH!
mochii LMAOO SAME
I’m attracted to girls lmao cause they’re not aggressive
Boy is another word for males, so stop talking to your dad
Big Idiot I- oK tHEn
“No boys!”
Me:
*JOKES ON YOU I’M GAY*
How does-
*Hol' up, wait a minute*
JOKES ON YOU IM DEPPERESSED
wait but that mean's you're a guy so its still no boys-
LMAO my mom took the place of my dad when I dated girls.
Your dad reminds me a little of my father. Insanely overprotective, but also aggressive.
He would never hit my mom or my sister or myself, but he had such a bad temper that when he felt he couldn't hold it in, he'd go out somewhere (usually to a bar) to pick a fight with someone.
And he usually won. My mom would be up the next morning, trying to get the blood stains out of Dad's white shirts.
4:56 thats borderline mental abuse i'm getting salty just watching this video
This story did not go in the direction I thought it was going. I approve of your dad for trying to break free from an abusive cycle and actually becoming friends with your boyfriend...but the anger issues and destroying your loved one's properties is still -iffy. If you're gonna destroy something, destroy your own stuff not your child's. Still, I'm glad you're on good terms with both your parents and still got to see your bf during that time. I respect that.
And this video is a very good example as to why parents really need to teach their kids to cook, clean, do laundry, etc., before they move out. So you don't get random phone calls asking, how to cook rice?
Take Yoga classes. All that negative energy will go away, including the anger.
Here is 2019, those are what we call "abusive parents".
oh no..
Its the truth
But it is abuse
All these crazy parents stories makes me think my parents are angels, sure they have some anger issues but they’ve never destroyed the house. If they got angry they’d usually be joking with us by the end of the day lol.