@@GrammarPDI’m in the exact same position as you bro. You’re not alone man. We will get through this. Is the first week which is the most uncomfortable. Yes it will suck ass but just think… you won’t be miserable anymore
I never talk about my sobriety…. I don’t even celebrate it like most people do, for some it might need to be in the forefront of your mind but for me I don’t want to count the days since I’ve been negative I want to count the days I’ve been positive
Quitting nicotine is honestly the best thing you can do for yourself. It feels almost rewarding when you put the last cigarette out or take that last puff off your vape and say I'm not this person anymore.
i stopped counting sober days from heroin because it was too much pressure on me, i felt like if i kept track of the days it would be more disappointing once i relapse even after all the sober time. and now i haven't touch heroin since 2020. i still haven't been able to do the same with meth yet tho but it's probably cause i don't really care or want to stop smoking it yet.
Why are you counting? That hit me, I don't have a "sober date" from opiods. I decided I didn't want to make that date something about me or my personality because I only saw it as a constant reminder.
Not the best mentality especially when you're starting. One week off something you're hooked on, without tracking and telling yourself its been 7 days, will feel like 3 weeks. Time will warp and convince you to do it again.
I took all suggestions in AA except 1. The counting of days. Sobriety isn't an accomplishment. It's just being a functional member of society. Where do they keep those medals for people who never destroy their lives and the lives of others?
@@JakeDaMistake if you don’t mind me asking how long did it take? I’m only a weed smoker but it’s to the point I’ve prioritized it over being productive which has hurt me and left me alone outside of my family.
What has worked for me and quitting isn’t counting days or thinking about NEVER smoking/drinking/doing drugs ever again, but just telling myself “not today”. It became so much more doable when I stopped thinking about FOREVER, and just focused on not doing it TODAY. String enough “todays” together and you’ll get there, it adds up.
Amen dude. No offense to this guy, or other people in the comments, but only someone who's truly an addict & has been (or still is) addicted will have your point of view. Happy for you. Hope one day I'll be there.
That’s a good way to look at it man. I use to hate dipping, so my plan to quit was drop cigarettes and switch to dip. I thought I would only use dip when the cravings were intense. I ended up getting hooked on dip for about a year lol. Every now and then when I’m drinking I’ll start thinking about how great a lip would be, I imagine that burning sensation of my gums and that feeling the nicotine course through me. I have held strong, I know how ashamed I will be of myself if I do.
@@marlacarley2839 you’re welcome, but I can’t take credit. It’s just something that worked/works for me when I first heard it and was struggling. I’m no veteran at sobriety, just had my own one year anniversary earlier this month. But when I do find something (anything) that works, I gladly share it with anyone else that can benefit. Btw, I’m still staying clean “just for today” but tomorrow looks pretty good too.
My addiction was to cigarettes (~40 a day). Your approach was how I quit smoking almost a year ago too. I kept telling myself "I can have one whenever I want one but I'm choosing not to right now and I'm aiming for twelve hours" and "it isn't never it's just not now". I wouldn't thank anybody for one now.
had a friend tell me the same things, he simply just asked me “why count if you’re never gonna do it again” literally changed my life. i have no idea how long ago i quit and im so glad to be done with it
@ClearGalaxies lol it's okay, it's just social media. It's not a college exam. By all the likes people understood what I meant. I believe he did to, he just wanted to feel significant.
This is genuinely one of the best lessons in life (even though the analogy is somewhat flawed). “Streaks” are the worst form of progress. You just have to CONVINCE yourself “that doesn’t align with my values and I’m not that person” even if you engaged in that activity yesterday. Saying “that’s just who I am” will simply reinforce your bad habits. (P.S. this way of thinking it’s what’s worked for me personally)
@@Rabbit-the-One😂except you could... you just didn't want too. Literally anybody can have control over themselves with anything, it Literally it comes down to how bad you want it, you clearly didn't want it bad enough at the time.
Y'all are just ignorant and don't know how addicition works. Of course they want to stop, but there's also the addiction that acts like a second voice that tells them to keep going. The thing is you have to fight against your own desires, just because your rational self wants something doesn't mean your mind stops giving you these urges.
The time I actually quit pills was when I didn't keep track of how many days then weeks, I've gone without. Honestly I can't tell you to this day. It's roughly 7 years, couldn't tell ya
I'm the same, I quit pills a month or so ago and I haven't really been counting the days. I just don't need to get high anymore. I took one for pain the other day, didn't affect me in the slightest now Im not scared of withdrawals. I do think some people need the group and the count though. It's a positive experience to show progress from something that controlled so much of your life. At least that's what I see in my friend who does count.
I don’t understand his point with this or he doesn’t understand addiction. There is always the relapse stage and it is just a part of it. It’s not common for someone to just feel shame and quit they have to be stronger than the addiction which means they tend to feel shame, relapse, the shame gets greater, then it repeats until eventually the shame and motivation to quit is stronger than the urge to do these drugs or chemicals we so attached ourselves to
@@CBFOXyou missed the point, why are you counting? It’s about changing your mindset towards attachment to the addiction; not about how long you can stay detached from it.
@@CBFOXI believe, his point totally makes sense for guys that just solved childhood issues and really break most attachments (other the G’d), so they really need no more “help” or “avoidance” from any external. This encourages you to realize you no longer need crutches.
@@neurobits @kingra5hid I normally don’t respond online to things but I feel like we have come to this for a reason. I’ve been in a family that struggles with addiction to a variety of things. Mostly alcoholics, but my mother was addicted to black tar and I’ve dependent on Mari for at least two of the years I’ve been smoking. have you been to drug abuse counseling? One of the things the teach you is yo count days to congratulate yourself. Everyday you become stronger than your addiction. The only crutch here is wheening off my friend. Don’t be so hard on yourself. We can all put bad habits, addiction and dependency behind us. This guys video is more than likely explaining the end stage of addiction where you have overcome it but if anyone thinks that addiction is something so simple that you can just decide not to have it one day then that person is lying to his or her self. It wouldn’t be called addiction if that’s how it worked it would just be a bad habit.
I used to be a heavy drinker. I hated myself. I gave up 1 day to try and change my life around. 9+ years later i haven't touched a drop of alcohol. I'm now happy. I have a fiancee and 2 kids. Quiting changed my life.
You're like a 19 year old Mormon missionary but you've studied addiction for years? Bro tell me the story behind that. I used to have tons of Mormon missionaries over for both years of COVID when they brought all you guys back to the States so there was tons more missionaries in town than usual and they were cycling through faster than usual. I became a local celeb with the Mormon missionary bros. I'd cook then dinner and then we'd go outside and I'd smoke a cigar and we'd talk Bible stuff.
Yeah I tell people to not use language like "I'm an alcoholic" or "I don't use/take said substance anymore" all the time, many don't listen, nor do they see the strength in identifying or labelling themself differently.
This is real. 20 years ago i said to myself i'm not a smoker anymore i am a healthy person from now on, and all the struggle i had began to disappear. Also i believe in God as a Christian and through prayer God helped me. 20 years baby.
Addicts say that to themselves daily. The problem is taking the substances themselves are a source to not feel sick and tired, even if it’s only temporarily
@@Skeeeeeyeeeeeeyea they are sick and tired sometimes even though it sounds harsh they need a family member or friend to lock there ass up in room for a week where they have no choice but to feel sick. Sometimes people have the strength to force themselves to go through it even if they can get it but the majority need to be forced to get through that part or it will never happen
Pshhh I said that for years before I finally gave up drinking in October after almost a decade and a half, and pot the same day October 12th after smoking for 19 years. And now I quit smoking cigarettes about a couple weeks ago after 19 years. But said I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired for almost a decade and a half. Since I started drinking my life has been absolute shit. Until I almost died October 12th stumbling into the main road blackout drunk and was hit by a car. Woke up in the hospital an hours drive away from where I was hit and didn't even know I was hit by a car... Until a nurse told me...
I think character is more important. Self-image feels more synonymous with reputation which is what others perceive of you. Who you are matters way more.
@@salamisumo2what others perceive you is public image? how you perceive yourself is self image. it sometimes eludes even you if you arent aware. eg, you may think you are brave, but when you give yourself excuses like i cant do this, or maybe when i get better i will try it, you are already undermining your bravery and eroding your self image
Quitting cigarettes was the best decision I ever made. Just to be able to get that truly full breath of air with no strain, no pain, no heaviness. I can work longer, i dont take extra breaks. Its simply worth it.
I agree man , my life is just happier now that i stopped smoking, for me personally it was a big achievement, i've never thought that i could do it , until one day i decided that enough is enough,
You are free now. Those chemicals that big companies put in them made you their slave. Your will is now much more stronger. It is truly impresive to be able to quit that adiction
That's exactly right, when I quit smoking I had five packs of cigarettes. I walked across town with the cigarettes, tossed them in a dumpster, and told myself I don't smoke anymore. Then for 2 weeks I just kept telling myself, I don't smoke anymore. Still don't smoke that was 30 years ago..
@@bigmeatswangin5837Smoking is a vice, it means that you don’t have 1000% control over yourself. There’s an external substance that you need to function outside of you, which means you don’t have 100% control over your life. Where your money goes, where your time goes.
@@slausonmoore You find a different activity to bide your time. I started working on small engines and studying electronics. I decided to become the small engine and electronic tinkerer guy instead of the beer guzzling chain smoking guy.
I have done exactly the same thing and it suddenly worked. I just kind of realized I always started smoking again because I kept rewarding myself for not smoking... by allowing myself a smoke from a friend. It was always that
I completely agree with this! So long as I was counting the days of my sobriety is how long I kept messing up and using again. As soon as I stopped counting the days and stopped making that my identity, or what they call in AA meetings, the "recovering addict", but as soon as I stopped all of this, then I finally stayed sober!! I think I've been sober about 4 years now but the exact timing doesn't matter to me because it's no longer my identity. I'm not an "addict" anymore. And that's why I don't go to meetings anymore because I hated saying that every time: "hi I'm Heather and I'm a recovering addict" NO! That's not who I am! I'm just Heather. And I'm strong. I'm amazing! I was never an "addict" that's just what they wanted me to say to keep me using. It feels so good to be free from that and free from the ideology. Everyone gets sober in their own time and in their own way. For some people, AA meetings and having a sponsor works. For me, this was just a way for me to have an excuse to still get high. I'm sorry if this post offends anyone. But I truly hope that instead, it helps someone. Helps them to see that you don't have to stay stuck in the addiction trap! You can be free like me! You can have a full and fulfilling life! ❤😊 to anyone who wants to talk about it. Please don't be afraid to comment back, and I'll help you in any way that I can. Just remember that you're worth it! 🤗 you are worth living for! You deserve a great life!
That’s so true. I always felt bad when I didn’t know the number of days I’d been clean when asked by other people in recovery. But this video makes me realize that counting the days means nothing. All I know is I’m clean and I don’t need to count each day, it’s just me now. I don’t even find the idea of getting high even for a day even slight appealing.
i use to try to attend NA meetings but i would immediately go find drugs & get high afterwards and eventually i realized those meetings were such a huge trigger for me lol.
@xChrisDarko The original poster is correct and you have it mixed up. By counting days, you are in a quiting mindset. Just as the poster stated, rather than being in a 'I am quiting' mindset, be in a 'I quit' mindset.
@@halouniverse7334 a person saying they quit 5 days ago is not not implying trying...however "I quit 5 days ago" fits the mindset you are both on. I agree with the guy in the video it's the wrong mindset. You're still announcing you're quitting IE trying to quit as apposed to just...not doing it 😂😂
Been trying to quit for years. Finally did. And it’s a totally different mindset. And what Theo said is accurate for me. That cigarette would be a life saver in some stressful situations. Cocaine makes you smoke like a chimney too. But once you have so many vices and you start to let some of them go, it’s easier to let the rest go.
There is a difference between depriving yourself of a thing, or actually quitting a thing. If you just depriving yourself you're going without it, which means you're going back to it. If you quit, you're done. It might sound like a redundant explanation but it's a complete state of mind.
@@Holywinter792 the difference is that the smoker still WANTS to do it. The best example I can offer is jail. People will go to jail for months. Years some times. You haven't been able to smoke in jails for a very long time. By the time they're out, the nicotine has all cleared their system. They have been without it for long enough that the habit of doing it has been broken. So why is it that the first thing someone does on release is go have a cigarette? Because they never made that mental distinction. They never told themselves with conviction that they were done, that they don't want to do that anymore, that they quit. It just wasn't an available option.
@@johnlakeyrudeboy this is where I was going to disagree with Tony. It’s a marker of change. You can ask yourself “is it worth it to throw XXX amount of work I put in for 1 Y?
Only people who would do that would be other crack heads. The easy solution would be not to surround yourself with crack heads and hang out with like-minded sober people. Pretty easy solution if you think about it.
that sounds like a nice mindset but as a hard core addict with years in recovery and around the recovery world it’s nowhere near that easy. You are very very much giving something up and many people will feel an odd but heavy sense of grief, grieving not only the substance and the addiction but the lifestyle, the friends, the adrenaline, the parties, everything. I think your comment was a very positive one tho so I’m not hating ❤️ just saying, if you say that to an addict in early recovery, don’t be surprised if they almost seem a little taken aback. Imagine grieving someone you cared for deeply and someone said “you’re not even losing anything”. again I get what you meant tho, just sharing a perspective (:
As someone who had a crippling addiction to heroin in my past, I can assure you, he is 100% right. I have no idea what date I quit. I know what date Mr. Kitty passed, my buddy who helped me get through it. I'd give anything for one more day with him. Heroin doesn't even enter my mind much anymore. It is possible to stop thinking about it. You just have to find something else you care about more.
Do you go or did you go to NA meetings and if so what do you think of opening by saying your name and that you're an addict ? Does this not go against what he's saying by instilling in your mind your an addict ? BTW I'm 6 years off heroin myself and I always hated that aspect of NA or AA meets
@@tristanhobbs1151 In this instance, speaking about it was appropriate. I don't talk about it or think about it unless someone else brings it up. In this case, the youtube algorithm. And no to the AA/NA. I didn't like that they wanted me to believe in god. Funnily enough, I found God years after getting sober anyways.
@@giaubrister6008 Personally, I got into treatment at a methadone clinic, and tapered off. I wouldn't recommend it unless you are 100% sure(or as close as you can get to that, you know when you know) you want to quit and won't go back. Methadone is like the last rip cord you can pull, don't pull it if you aren't ready. Or it'll just turn into another addiction or god forbid you'll do both at the same time even and destroy your tolerance and possibly worse.
@@dadon3455Nah, the hardest part is beating that mindset. Still working on it. Keep your head held high and keep fighting. Never give up. It’s worth the effort!!
For people that struggle... we all do struggle sometimes... for people that are lonely... we all feel lonely some times... for people that are quitters... we all have been quitters sometimes... we all people while some are going through it and others don't. The endless circles that define evil and god. Those who create earth... those who destroy... there is only time that will stop us from being what we are, its happening right now right under our eyes. We declining in population at massive rate in the west, because we to busy being sad. We should man up and accept time will end our journey and someday you will die and that day is not today. So give it your best shot and do something meaningfull, even when u struggle, do something that gives purpose. If you can't be happy make someone else happy. Give babys to your girl. Start a family and if you all fuckeduppp still try to give purpose to your life. Giving up is never an option even though noone loves you. Its to give love to get loved. U don't find love in youre life. U create love and if ur mind is not on the right trackk reflect and accept the consequences of your actions. Like the adult u were when u made the choiche. Be the man or woman that is expected of you, not for anyoneelse but yourself.
This is powerful I’m almost 8 months sober and no one knows besides my best friends and you guys I tell on RUclips, cuz I don’t need the congrads and I don’t deserve it. I’m just not that person anymore.
Said you don't need the congrats, but you definitely deserve it. It's probably hard to believe coming from a random Internet person, but I'm proud of you bro.
Just try having a few less smokes throughout the day. Cutting down on anything, as you know, is just a state off mind thing. You kicked alcohol to the curb. Eventually you’ll just be tired of thinking you need a smoke. Ultimately, you’re just filling a void with an activity. That being said, I do, occasionally, enjoy a good smoke! All the best.
As someone who's struggling to quit porn, this is actually really good advice. You've got to seperate the addicted identity from yourself otherwise you'll always be counting and failing.
Your identity is God's child. You're a man of God above all. If you've been adopted by The Most High, then there's no identity that this world can give you, or that you can give yourself that prevails over the identity and purpose that God has for you.
as someone who used to be an addict for many years, it is. Quitting anything is a zero step process, all that shit they preach at AA/NA is straight up bullshit, period. Some people struggle because being addicted to something and hanging out with other addicts is the only identity they ever had. Once you create new identity, quitting is easy. This is from experience.
Why? I find everything said here to be relevant to all addiction. Sober homes and all these step programs exist to help people realign their identity with addiction. They do many other great things too. The social problem, at least in the US is the “virtue” of being sober, celebrating clean days etc. If counting days helps then great, but it doesn’t mean everyone else needs to feel/celebrate it with you. Plenty of people pick up and put down with no issues. So yes it is that simple, the process might not be. 🤷♂️
My path to sobriety started with 6 weeks off. I was counting days, I had no plans to stop when I got through it. Then I did. If you wanna count days to see if you can make it, do it 🙏
Same here when I quit drinking I told myself I’d go a full month, then the month came and went and I just kept going and the longer I went without it the less appealing it seemed
Jesus Loves you so much! You may not think it but there is a reason you’re seeing this. He wants you to know Him so you Two can have a Relationship:)❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@@davidd7917 Jesus Loves you so much! You may not think it but there is a reason you’re seeing this. He wants you to know Him so you Two can have a Relationship:)❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I had to go to AA bc I got a DWI. I sat there every day listening to ppl and how they overcame their challenges. But everybody counted the days. 1,000 days, and you still didn't learn.. If you keep up with the past, it will never leave you.
I said this earlier before watching this videos. I drank after 73 days..that was my decision. Now it's my decision to be free. The clean and or free time always went faster when I didn't count.
@@ryanspangler4569 dig deeper. Insecurities. Shortcomings you may feel you have in life? Lack of self confidence… the list can go on. When i’m actually happy drinking doesnt even cross my mind
lol be careful with ol banana hands, I have a guy that was my friend for 20 years and he got heavy into all this Robbin’s shit and it turned him into a complete asshole. Total 180 degrees from the person I knew for two decades. Bizarre and may not have been Tony’s teachings but I’ll tell you, it was all he talked out one side of his mouth while beginning to treat people like trash. Multiple multi year friends abandoned him because of his attitude. Just saying, careful who you follow. We should really only be following Jesus
@@ericredelman2568 sick shallow hal reference my man lol only read 1 book of his a couple years ago was some positive motivation thats all. Sorry about your friend
Here is my experience which can be interesting for all smokers: I smoked for seven years. By the end I smoked more than one pack a day. I started having panic attacks for all sorts of reasons and I started noticing the triggers. Tobacco was one. The day I realized that I quit cold turkey from night to day. After a couple of years, my anxiety was dealt with pretty much and I wanted to test if I would become addicted to cigarettes again or if I was out. So I smoked a pack of cigarrettes. And I didn't feel anything. It felt empty. In hindsight, I realize that my consciousness was already on edge which made smoking more enjoyable, more thrilling, more addictive. But it was really myself I was experiencing through the smokes. People think ciggs make you calmer but it's the opposite. They make you more anxious but for a short period, while smoking, you passify the joneses; but then it increases your anxiety and you'll go right back to your base level which gives you a false sense of reduced anxiety. Think about it: how does carboration inhaled 'oxygenate' your blood and brain and not make you even more tachycardic? It obviously does so. The butts no longer did anything to me worth mentioning because my base heart rate and anxiety were in healthy levels and so it didn't hype my conscious state to that adrenaline-esque nicotine pump. It's not about identity per se. It's about whether you want to be a calm individual that can better face stress or whether you want to have destroyed lungs, poor oxygenated brain, and become less efficatious as you become a more stress sensitive individual. Once you see it you can't unsee it. And the same goes for weed. Even booze and coffee, to be honest. Coffee is a tax you pay later to stay more active in that moment but it saps your energy on the long run. Likewise, booze interferes with rem sleep which ends up also sapping your energy as you never rest properly. All these vices are fun on occasion but if you do it regularly it's because you are self-sabotaging. Granted, sometimes we are stuck in ruts often beyond our control. In my experience family disfunctions are the hardest ruts to overcome. It makes you guilty if you overcome them and if not it makes you depressed and anxious.
So true about the drinking thing. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen someone from AA post on social media or announce to everyone that they’ve reached 30 days, which is awesome but almost always within a few more days, they’re back on the wagon again. It’s like they needed that validation that they quit for 30 days, achieved that and can now drink normally again. When I quit I literally stopped keeping track and really only “celebrated” each year. Mostly by thanking my dad for helping me get into a sober living and giving me another shot at life. Other than that I kept that shit to myself.
My motivation to quit was getting UAs regularly on a 2 year probation sentence, one hot or dilute and it was a violation potentially warranting revocation of probation and straight to DOC for 3-5 years. Havent really been counting the days but im right around three years sober give or take, only reason i know is because my probation sentence was just completed this week and there was about 8 months of pretrial hearings. Few months shy of three years if my maths check out. But on that note, quitting was as simple as finally realizing i dont need that shit in my life. It does me no good, lands me in trouble, and after so long i didnt even enjoy it i was just chasing a buzz because thats all my purpose in life was. Chase the buzz and escape the mundane existence. I gotta say though, i probably never would have gotten sober had i not been arrested and detoxxed for over a month, with the extra motivation of staying out of prison upon getting a 1k PR bond on a felony.
Nah, that’s a shit take. Counting your sobriety adds an additional value to it. It’s recognising how far you’ve come, whilst also increasing your determination to not let it slip for anything. I like a lot of what Tony says but he made himself sound like any-man here preaching about something he knows nothing about.
I'm all for fully committing to a plight, but sometimes the battle is so hard that signalling the smallest of accomplishments, from the first day of success to the 900th, is purposeful encouragement to thyself, not an expectation to relapse.
I agree, I know the date I stopped drinking, and celebrate the anniversary every year. 14 years next month. It’s not because I will re-start - it’s to show how strong & committed I can be…and what a success it has been.
Yeah Me Robbins should know that people are motivated by positive feedback. And you can’t have a complete identity change over night. Only after stringing some time together, by counting those single days, can you honestly say “I’m not that person anymore”. If you just haven’t smoke crack for 6 days, you’re full of it if you say “That’s no longer who I am”. Your lips are still burnt and you’ve still got callouses on your lighter finger
It works when you want to do something more often as well. I started telling myself i enjoy reading, i am an avid reader. And all the sudden i am addicted to reading, just a month ago it was a chore, now I structure my day around my free time to sit with a good book and my own thoughts. I definitely need to implement this in other aspects of my life.
Man this is spot on. When I quit drinking and smoking I just quit. It’s been probably 5 years but I don’t honestly know how long it’s been because I’m not counting, I’m just living my life.
Congratulations. Sobriety can be mysterious. I think the real change happens at such a deep, subconscious level, that often there isn’t really an explanation that you can personally take credit for. I’ve tried probably literally hundreds of times to get clean. Now I’ve been sober for a few years, but it’s not like I was more serious this time than all the other times; I always wanted it, just couldn’t do it. Now I can, and it’s not that hard, but it’s because something changed deep inside me, and it’s not really because of some action I took, or some change I decided to make in my thinking. It’s more like my brain just was finally able to do the math, and now just doesn’t really send me the compulsion to drink or use drugs anymore.
I quit smoking almost 7 years now, close ones still smoke and I can't handle the smoke, the moment I smell it its painful to me, its like my body begging me to get away from this area of hell. it completely changed my life. However, I was far more relaxed while smoking, and it cut my hunger, so quitting made me choose another vice, which was sugar and caffeine. Which causes exponentially higher stress levels, causing mental pain, stress, brain fog, hyper anxiety and so on. But all worth it. It cure my asthma, which I later learned that it was just excessive amount of white mucus accumulation every time i smoked. Nevertheless, a change in identity is far stronger than a change in habits or even willpower. You need to stop and not relate to your addictions anymore. You need to set higher standards for yourself without raising your ego. So it's tough, but it comes with time. Repeat daily until it becomes you, a part of you, your identity.
I used to drink only diet soda with my cheeseburger and fries. I’m not one of those anymore. From this day forward I commit to drinking only pure, full sugar soft drinks. Thank you ❤.
Agreed but counting days is definitely a bad way to go about quitting things. Nobody would ever suggest counting how many days it has been since you broke up with your ex since it just reminds you of him/her. The same applies to substances, you are going to be way too tempted to go crawling back if you constantly have it on your mind.
@kblack8525 I agree 100%. Quite a few people have asked me, "Why do you still refer to yourself as an "addict" after having over a year clean?" I usually respond with, " the narcotics anonymous program/personal experience has taught me that as soon as I let my guard down and allow myself to believe I'm "cured" and am no longer an addict will be and has been the start of my relapses." Personally, I need to remember that I can and have many times screwed up because I tend to get cocky and arrogant once I accumulate a chunk of clean time, which causes me to forget that my addiction is outside my door at all times doing push ups to be ready to get me again. Idk man sorry for such a long-winded response. It's late as hell here in pittsburgh, and I'm exhausted, so I'm also sorry if it doesn't make much sense, haha😅
I did my last shot of herion on 4-18-19 and have been clean since 4-19-19 and I don't go to NA or AA I just don't use. I remember my clean date as a way to inspire to stay clean, if I get a craving I'll tell myself I've worked to hard for almost 5 years just to fuck it up now.
Just sharing not counting, I quit yesterday and today I almost stopped at the store and bought a pack of cigarettes but I told myself why, what if you don't smoke you're going to die. I kept on driving😇.
@@saskiasofia thank you. I was three packs a day and from one day to the next zero. At work today I didn't go to the any of the areas where they're smoking and I got me some bubble gum with a soda.
Keep fucking going bro. Even if the cravings come in waves. Just know you’re doing yourself and your health a huge favor. I’m in the same boat you are but it’s been 3 months. I smoked a pack a day. You got this shit bro
Damn... damn. Addiction sucks. It ain't a disease.. it's a choice. And I chose to keep going back. I'll quit one day. One day soon hopefully. Alcoholism is a bitch.. but I'll beat it. I promise.
This is so true!! I used be an addict and when I stopped I was done. Never went to any meetings or similar. I did not indentify myself as an drug addict anymore.
@@jonathandavis3243 It's totally doable. It sucks horribly for like 3 days. But u bounce back quick. Go to a Dr. Or urgent care and explain your situation and they can give you anti seizure meds like kepra, and a few days worth of Ativan to make u more comfortable. Or check into a 7 day detox at rehab, they give u meds so u don't feel like hammered crap.
Tony is right. I was counting every day, and even every year after, I quit smoking. I finally lost count around 8 years in and stopped trying to keep count. I still haven't smoked to this day.
seems like evidence to the contrary. In all honesty it sounds like incredible advice, but in reality it's just ok advice. You absolutely should adopt the mindset that "I'm not a smoker/drinker/pill popper/nail bitter/ whatever it is" But to insinuate that counting is inherently failing is going too far. I recently gave up smoking again after having thought I had succeeded last year(lasted 4 months before remission). This time I counted the first 4-5 days and then started to lose track. I think I'm around 2 weeks now. Counting those first few days was helpful because I felt unnerved and uncomfortable. I needed to remind myself why I felt so anxious and why it was important for me to fight the urges. I knew that every day it would get a little bit easier. I still have the occasional strong desire to smoke, but it's my knowledge of just how detrimental that "just one puff" is that gives me the perspective to say "I don't smoke" For a long time I wanted so badly to be an occasional smoker. I had to have that remission to learn that it's just not the case. If I allow myself to smoke once a month it will lead to once a week, which will lead to once a day and so on and so forth.
@@farfromirrational948 every time I had a withdrawal from smoking I would hold my breath for 20-30 seconds, I would get a headrush every time I did it. It was about 3 months of withdrawals but after that I never had the urge to smoke and it’s been 11 years, I never counted the days but I know the date because it was a New Year’s resolution
That's a very good point! I'm going to stop counting. Celebrating every year does convey a message that I'm counting like I'm going to start again instead of just using a new identity to stop for good.
Everyone is a sinner, every Christian deserves hell but it is only because Jesus died on the cross for us that our sins are forgiven. Not our works, or what we’ve accomplished but the love of Jesus dying for us and our sins.
I have stopped smoking lately and i totally agree with him about not counting the days , i have tried to quit smoking before but this time is just different, one day i was a smoker, the next day i wasn't anymore, i'm no longer a smoker , it's was that simple to do , just needed a little focus and conviction
Tony Robbins is soooooo inspiring his stepson was at a behavioral modification place when he was a teen. Knew him I was there. Courage family right Tony ? Sit down
This is so true. I quit alcohol then years later I quit weed. This is after decades of daily use. I just kept in mind that it doesn't have anything for me. It's just not who I am anymore. It doesn't work out for me when I use it. Some people can use and be okay. I can't. Nothing good happens when I use it. I'm not the type of person that benefits from weed or alcohol. I changed the way I feel about it by seeing the truth.
He’s wrong. I quit smoking 23 years ago and will never go back, but I’m still a smoker. My body remembers the addiction. One smoke and I’d be right back where I was 23 years ago.
Im 22 now and ive been smoking since i was 14, started smoking weed at 15 and i gotta tell you addiction is a bitch its hard to go even a single day without smoking something but i try as hard as I can to only smoke once a day now, I know thats still not good but im trying
“99% is a bitch, 100% is a breeze.” Its a whole lot easier to quit when you’re 100% committed
I keep a toe in because it’s more comfortable. Yet I’m so miserable. Thanks for your comment. This helps me
@@GrammarPDI’m in the exact same position as you bro. You’re not alone man. We will get through this. Is the first week which is the most uncomfortable. Yes it will suck ass but just think… you won’t be miserable anymore
@@Brody460 first week started with my first day (today). Ugh it sucks man. Thank you for your kind words
@@GrammarPD you got this
@@Brody460 thanks Jake. I needed this. I hope you find every happy moment you’re looking for in 2024
Tony Robbins helped me through some datk times, absolute giant of a man.
Wow I really needed to hear this. Thank you.
I quit smoking over 2 years ago and I totally agree. The exact day I quit I don't remember. Now I can't even stand the smell of cigarettes.
I never talk about my sobriety…. I don’t even celebrate it like most people do, for some it might need to be in the forefront of your mind but for me I don’t want to count the days since I’ve been negative I want to count the days I’ve been positive
Damn this hit hard with the drinking
People counting 40 years sober just to go back according to this guy
Damn son that hit hard 😅
Quitting nicotine is honestly the best thing you can do for yourself. It feels almost rewarding when you put the last cigarette out or take that last puff off your vape and say I'm not this person anymore.
Damn, never thought about it like that.
i stopped counting sober days from heroin because it was too much pressure on me, i felt like if i kept track of the days it would be more disappointing once i relapse even after all the sober time. and now i haven't touch heroin since 2020. i still haven't been able to do the same with meth yet tho but it's probably cause i don't really care or want to stop smoking it yet.
Why are you counting? That hit me, I don't have a "sober date" from opiods. I decided I didn't want to make that date something about me or my personality because I only saw it as a constant reminder.
Best addiction in the world is the gym
Not the best mentality especially when you're starting. One week off something you're hooked on, without tracking and telling yourself its been 7 days, will feel like 3 weeks. Time will warp and convince you to do it again.
It's not a big deal. It's very easy to quit smoking or drinking. Trust me. I've done it many times.
I only tell people because I’m proud of going cold turkey just recently hit my 15th month without them
I used to play hockey... I dont. Doesnt mean I'm gunna diss an NHL star like that
Yeah I'm not a stoner anymore
Sounds like Allen Carr's theory.
"why're you counting?" That really spoke to me. It's a new identity.
😮 same
I took all suggestions in AA except 1. The counting of days. Sobriety isn't an accomplishment. It's just being a functional member of society. Where do they keep those medals for people who never destroy their lives and the lives of others?
Everytime I count or tell ppl .ppl would just respond ppl always relapse...so true
Exactly.
Good point ❤@@deeznutz8300
Bro just put things into perspective in a way I’ve ignorantly looked past numerous times!
This is exactly why im sober but don’t go to AA
@@JakeDaMistake if you don’t mind me asking how long did it take? I’m only a weed smoker but it’s to the point I’ve prioritized it over being productive which has hurt me and left me alone outside of my family.
I’m sober as well, it’s been around 3 years, I hit my rock bottom finally and chose change.
@@Vikturus2k6 man that’s good to hear! I’m glad you chose better for yourself!
Sick dude 😂😂😂😂
What has worked for me and quitting isn’t counting days or thinking about NEVER smoking/drinking/doing drugs ever again, but just telling myself “not today”. It became so much more doable when I stopped thinking about FOREVER, and just focused on not doing it TODAY. String enough “todays” together and you’ll get there, it adds up.
Amen dude. No offense to this guy, or other people in the comments, but only someone who's truly an addict & has been (or still is) addicted will have your point of view.
Happy for you. Hope one day I'll be there.
Wow. "Not today". I love this.
That’s a good way to look at it man. I use to hate dipping, so my plan to quit was drop cigarettes and switch to dip. I thought I would only use dip when the cravings were intense. I ended up getting hooked on dip for about a year lol. Every now and then when I’m drinking I’ll start thinking about how great a lip would be, I imagine that burning sensation of my gums and that feeling the nicotine course through me. I have held strong, I know how ashamed I will be of myself if I do.
@@marlacarley2839 you’re welcome, but I can’t take credit. It’s just something that worked/works for me when I first heard it and was struggling. I’m no veteran at sobriety, just had my own one year anniversary earlier this month. But when I do find something (anything) that works, I gladly share it with anyone else that can benefit. Btw, I’m still staying clean “just for today” but tomorrow looks pretty good too.
My addiction was to cigarettes (~40 a day). Your approach was how I quit smoking almost a year ago too. I kept telling myself "I can have one whenever I want one but I'm choosing not to right now and I'm aiming for twelve hours" and "it isn't never it's just not now". I wouldn't thank anybody for one now.
had a friend tell me the same things, he simply just asked me “why count if you’re never gonna do it again” literally changed my life. i have no idea how long ago i quit and im so glad to be done with it
Dang that’s deep
❤
That's a good friend
You count the beginning cause you still want it. That's the part he's skipping out on just to push his bullsh1t ......
@@ryanwells5887 cry harder
Peter sage said it well" Identity shift is stronger then willpower "
He didn't say that.
STONGER THAN.
@@Vertical-sandwiches 😑😑😑
No it isn’t
@KarlPilkington89 Do u thenk are smarter then him?
@ClearGalaxies lol it's okay, it's just social media. It's not a college exam. By all the likes people understood what I meant. I believe he did to, he just wanted to feel significant.
This is genuinely one of the best lessons in life (even though the analogy is somewhat flawed). “Streaks” are the worst form of progress. You just have to CONVINCE yourself “that doesn’t align with my values and I’m not that person” even if you engaged in that activity yesterday. Saying “that’s just who I am” will simply reinforce your bad habits. (P.S. this way of thinking it’s what’s worked for me personally)
Today
@@iamjonah598day by day and day after day every day. And be kind to yourself but hold yourself accountable when you have small slips
You're clueless
So true. It's been over 700 days since I learned that lesson
@@mitchellstoneshampoo😂
Quitting an addiction makes you realise how it wasn’t that you couldn’t but that you simply didn’t want to.
What? No. I disagree with you. I was addicted. I wanted to stop for years, but I couldn't. It didn't matter what I wanted or not.
@@Rabbit-the-One that's just a weak mindset, only exceptions are severe withdrawals from opioids which can be lethal.
@@Rabbit-the-One😂except you could... you just didn't want too. Literally anybody can have control over themselves with anything, it Literally it comes down to how bad you want it, you clearly didn't want it bad enough at the time.
Y'all are just ignorant and don't know how addicition works. Of course they want to stop, but there's also the addiction that acts like a second voice that tells them to keep going. The thing is you have to fight against your own desires, just because your rational self wants something doesn't mean your mind stops giving you these urges.
@@Rabbit-the-Onenah
The time I actually quit pills was when I didn't keep track of how many days then weeks, I've gone without. Honestly I can't tell you to this day. It's roughly 7 years, couldn't tell ya
Good shi brotha wish I could do the same
Keep doin’ what you’re doin’ brother
Sam's I quit hundreds of times I've only been done once
Each day in an endeavor
I'm the same, I quit pills a month or so ago and I haven't really been counting the days. I just don't need to get high anymore.
I took one for pain the other day, didn't affect me in the slightest now Im not scared of withdrawals.
I do think some people need the group and the count though. It's a positive experience to show progress from something that controlled so much of your life. At least that's what I see in my friend who does count.
"Why are you counting, so you can tell people long did you last this time" i love that.❤❤❤
I don’t understand his point with this or he doesn’t understand addiction. There is always the relapse stage and it is just a part of it. It’s not common for someone to just feel shame and quit they have to be stronger than the addiction which means they tend to feel shame, relapse, the shame gets greater, then it repeats until eventually the shame and motivation to quit is stronger than the urge to do these drugs or chemicals we so attached ourselves to
@@CBFOXyou missed the point, why are you counting? It’s about changing your mindset towards attachment to the addiction; not about how long you can stay detached from it.
@@CBFOXI believe, his point totally makes sense for guys that just solved childhood issues and really break most attachments (other the G’d), so they really need no more “help” or “avoidance” from any external.
This encourages you to realize you no longer need crutches.
You count days in rehab to congratulate yourself… you guys don’t get addiction or at least not from an addiction counseling level
@@neurobits @kingra5hid I normally don’t respond online to things but I feel like we have come to this for a reason. I’ve been in a family that struggles with addiction to a variety of things. Mostly alcoholics, but my mother was addicted to black tar and I’ve dependent on Mari for at least two of the years I’ve been smoking. have you been to drug abuse counseling? One of the things the teach you is yo count days to congratulate yourself. Everyday you become stronger than your addiction. The only crutch here is wheening off my friend. Don’t be so hard on yourself. We can all put bad habits, addiction and dependency behind us. This guys video is more than likely explaining the end stage of addiction where you have overcome it but if anyone thinks that addiction is something so simple that you can just decide not to have it one day then that person is lying to his or her self. It wouldn’t be called addiction if that’s how it worked it would just be a bad habit.
I felt Theo when he said it doesn’t make him happy anymore, it’s a weird feeling when you literally can’t even feel the happy chemicals
WORD. FELT IT DEEP MAN
It’s the gay ass music behind it breh it ain’t THAT DEEP
I used to be a heavy drinker. I hated myself. I gave up 1 day to try and change my life around. 9+ years later i haven't touched a drop of alcohol. I'm now happy. I have a fiancee and 2 kids. Quiting changed my life.
Same here buddy
Why U counting for
NO TONY ROBBINS SAYS YOU CAN'T COUNT!
@@misterbickisjust because you know how long it’s been doesn’t mean you counted. If you know you quit in 2014 then you know it’s been 9+ years
Let it go bro, You still identifying as a ex alcoholic, you just don't drink. Don't need to tell people every chance you get
I can really resonate with this, but not with smoking. I didn't realize that I really needed to see this at this moment. Thank you!
You addicted to Teanna Trump videos
can apply anywhere
@@AG-yc7vtwho aint
@@AG-yc7vtcan’t blame him
"YEAAAHH COCAAINNEE"
😂😂😂
Holy crap, years of studying addiction and this is completely on point! It comes down to identity.
Jesus figured this out long ago
No
You're like a 19 year old Mormon missionary but you've studied addiction for years?
Bro tell me the story behind that. I used to have tons of Mormon missionaries over for both years of COVID when they brought all you guys back to the States so there was tons more missionaries in town than usual and they were cycling through faster than usual.
I became a local celeb with the Mormon missionary bros. I'd cook then dinner and then we'd go outside and I'd smoke a cigar and we'd talk Bible stuff.
Yeah I tell people to not use language like "I'm an alcoholic" or "I don't use/take said substance anymore" all the time, many don't listen, nor do they see the strength in identifying or labelling themself differently.
When drinking really hit me at the core of my health. I literally stop right then on the spot. Have touched it since. Been 5 yrs this February.
This is real. 20 years ago i said to myself i'm not a smoker anymore i am a healthy person from now on, and all the struggle i had began to disappear. Also i believe in God as a Christian and through prayer God helped me. 20 years baby.
Amen jesus can heal any addiction ❤
Why you counting? lol jk. Good job man 👏🏾
@@myinmyin1997 i quit 6 months ago thanks to god , dont miss it at all i know its a trap
I had help from Jesus....it was hard and a struggle.
So happy for you!❤😊
The only way someone will quit anything is when they finally say to themselves "I'm sick and tired, of being sick and tired".
Addicts say that to themselves daily. The problem is taking the substances themselves are a source to not feel sick and tired, even if it’s only temporarily
@@Skeeeeeyeeeeeeyea they are sick and tired sometimes even though it sounds harsh they need a family member or friend to lock there ass up in room for a week where they have no choice but to feel sick. Sometimes people have the strength to force themselves to go through it even if they can get it but the majority need to be forced to get through that part or it will never happen
"The sage is not sick. He is sick of being sick. Therefore, he is not sick" -Tao Te Ching
Pshhh I said that for years before I finally gave up drinking in October after almost a decade and a half, and pot the same day October 12th after smoking for 19 years. And now I quit smoking cigarettes about a couple weeks ago after 19 years. But said I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired for almost a decade and a half. Since I started drinking my life has been absolute shit. Until I almost died October 12th stumbling into the main road blackout drunk and was hit by a car. Woke up in the hospital an hours drive away from where I was hit and didn't even know I was hit by a car... Until a nurse told me...
I'm 2 tired like a DWAMN motorcycle...
Nothing more powerful then you're own self-image.
I think character is more important. Self-image feels more synonymous with reputation which is what others perceive of you. Who you are matters way more.
@salamisumo2 Nope. Look it up in psychology science text books. Self-image is the most powerful thing in your mind.
@@salamisumo2what others perceive you is public image? how you perceive yourself is self image. it sometimes eludes even you if you arent aware. eg, you may think you are brave, but when you give yourself excuses like i cant do this, or maybe when i get better i will try it, you are already undermining your bravery and eroding your self image
I would take being literate over self image 😂
@@acey6991 😂😂😂😂 lol niceeee ! That was a good one that'll go over many people's heads !
your*
Quitting cigarettes was the best decision I ever made. Just to be able to get that truly full breath of air with no strain, no pain, no heaviness. I can work longer, i dont take extra breaks. Its simply worth it.
I agree man , my life is just happier now that i stopped smoking, for me personally it was a big achievement, i've never thought that i could do it , until one day i decided that enough is enough,
Facts
You are free now. Those chemicals that big companies put in them made you their slave. Your will is now much more stronger. It is truly impresive to be able to quit that adiction
Facts, weed and vapes for me so much better without it
@@staydismantling9354😂
That's exactly right, when I quit smoking I had five packs of cigarettes. I walked across town with the cigarettes, tossed them in a dumpster, and told myself I don't smoke anymore. Then for 2 weeks I just kept telling myself, I don't smoke anymore. Still don't smoke that was 30 years ago..
Should have a cigarette to celebrate🎉
😂😂😂😂 such a knob @@L213-e9g
@@L213-e9g I only smoke bud now 😆
@@L213-e9gtoo bad you couldn’t celebrate your father coming home. 🎉🎉 😢
@@L213-e9g😂😂
I quit my addiction when I truly wanted something more than what my addiction gave me.
This is a beautiful way to put it.
Bot
Im not sure what Im missing by continuing to smoke. Smoking rocks.
I have thought this for a while, regarding the futurity of my pot habits
@@bigmeatswangin5837Smoking is a vice, it means that you don’t have 1000% control over yourself. There’s an external substance that you need to function outside of you, which means you don’t have 100% control over your life. Where your money goes, where your time goes.
Dude is 💯 correct. When I quit smoking and drinking, I literally reprogrammed my mind to not be that guy anymore.
What did yku do tho it' like I be boreder if I dont smoke
🍪
@@slausonmoore You find a different activity to bide your time. I started working on small engines and studying electronics. I decided to become the small engine and electronic tinkerer guy instead of the beer guzzling chain smoking guy.
@@slausonmooreit’s a mindset , you think your bored if you don’t smoke but it’s just you finding an excuse to go out of your way and smoke
I have done exactly the same thing and it suddenly worked. I just kind of realized I always started smoking again because I kept rewarding myself for not smoking... by allowing myself a smoke from a friend. It was always that
I completely agree with this! So long as I was counting the days of my sobriety is how long I kept messing up and using again. As soon as I stopped counting the days and stopped making that my identity, or what they call in AA meetings, the "recovering addict", but as soon as I stopped all of this, then I finally stayed sober!! I think I've been sober about 4 years now but the exact timing doesn't matter to me because it's no longer my identity. I'm not an "addict" anymore. And that's why I don't go to meetings anymore because I hated saying that every time: "hi I'm Heather and I'm a recovering addict" NO! That's not who I am! I'm just Heather. And I'm strong. I'm amazing! I was never an "addict" that's just what they wanted me to say to keep me using. It feels so good to be free from that and free from the ideology. Everyone gets sober in their own time and in their own way. For some people, AA meetings and having a sponsor works. For me, this was just a way for me to have an excuse to still get high. I'm sorry if this post offends anyone. But I truly hope that instead, it helps someone. Helps them to see that you don't have to stay stuck in the addiction trap! You can be free like me! You can have a full and fulfilling life! ❤😊 to anyone who wants to talk about it. Please don't be afraid to comment back, and I'll help you in any way that I can. Just remember that you're worth it! 🤗 you are worth living for! You deserve a great life!
Nice one! ❤ Live long & prosper 🤘
That’s so true. I always felt bad when I didn’t know the number of days I’d been clean when asked by other people in recovery. But this video makes me realize that counting the days means nothing. All I know is I’m clean and I don’t need to count each day, it’s just me now. I don’t even find the idea of getting high even for a day even slight appealing.
i use to try to attend NA meetings but i would immediately go find drugs & get high afterwards and eventually i realized those meetings were such a huge trigger for me lol.
Facts. People always say they're TRYING to quit. That's why they fail. You gotta tell yourself you quit.
Isn't that the opposite of what he's saying? Ie if you've "quit" for 5 days have you really quit?
@xChrisDarko
The original poster is correct and you have it mixed up.
By counting days, you are in a quiting mindset. Just as the poster stated, rather than being in a 'I am quiting' mindset, be in a 'I quit' mindset.
@@halouniverse7334 a person saying they quit 5 days ago is not not implying trying...however "I quit 5 days ago" fits the mindset you are both on. I agree with the guy in the video it's the wrong mindset. You're still announcing you're quitting IE trying to quit as apposed to just...not doing it 😂😂
Been trying to quit for years. Finally did. And it’s a totally different mindset. And what Theo said is accurate for me. That cigarette would be a life saver in some stressful situations. Cocaine makes you smoke like a chimney too. But once you have so many vices and you start to let some of them go, it’s easier to let the rest go.
You never tell anybody that you're quitting
There is a difference between depriving yourself of a thing, or actually quitting a thing. If you just depriving yourself you're going without it, which means you're going back to it. If you quit, you're done. It might sound like a redundant explanation but it's a complete state of mind.
A smoker depriving themselves of smoking vs A non smoker not smoking
@@Holywinter792 the difference is that the smoker still WANTS to do it.
The best example I can offer is jail. People will go to jail for months. Years some times. You haven't been able to smoke in jails for a very long time. By the time they're out, the nicotine has all cleared their system. They have been without it for long enough that the habit of doing it has been broken. So why is it that the first thing someone does on release is go have a cigarette? Because they never made that mental distinction. They never told themselves with conviction that they were done, that they don't want to do that anymore, that they quit. It just wasn't an available option.
In recovery counting days is a beautiful thing each day sober is gift to be celebrated
Yes it is!! ❤ To you and wish you all the peace and joy ever!
Especially for those that went through some really tough stuff. That counting is absolutely a celebration of their rebirth.
yep, totally with this. Counting the days is special.
@@johnlakeyrudeboy this is where I was going to disagree with Tony. It’s a marker of change. You can ask yourself “is it worth it to throw XXX amount of work I put in for 1 Y?
I agree. I think it’s ok to take it one day at a time and be grateful. Extreme thinking isn’t always productive.
I am no longer a crack head but please don't put a massive rock in a pipe and hand it to me
You’re still a crackhead then…jk everyone goes through shit good for you bettering yourself
Only people who would do that would be other crack heads. The easy solution would be not to surround yourself with crack heads and hang out with like-minded sober people. Pretty easy solution if you think about it.
Hahahaha
@@johnkoepke4807 just saying incase you were thinking of surprising me John 😉
Are you hunter Biden
The other trick is to remember you’re not “giving something up” you’re gaining something, your freedom
that sounds like a nice mindset but as a hard core addict with years in recovery and around the recovery world it’s nowhere near that easy. You are very very much giving something up and many people will feel an odd but heavy sense of grief, grieving not only the substance and the addiction but the lifestyle, the friends, the adrenaline, the parties, everything. I think your comment was a very positive one tho so I’m not hating ❤️ just saying, if you say that to an addict in early recovery, don’t be surprised if they almost seem a little taken aback. Imagine grieving someone you cared for deeply and someone said “you’re not even losing anything”. again I get what you meant tho, just sharing a perspective (:
When i stopped counting, i felt like i had nothing to lost. Helped so much to take the pressure off and won't have to reset all my hard work
As someone who had a crippling addiction to heroin in my past, I can assure you, he is 100% right. I have no idea what date I quit. I know what date Mr. Kitty passed, my buddy who helped me get through it. I'd give anything for one more day with him. Heroin doesn't even enter my mind much anymore.
It is possible to stop thinking about it. You just have to find something else you care about more.
Do you go or did you go to NA meetings and if so what do you think of opening by saying your name and that you're an addict ? Does this not go against what he's saying by instilling in your mind your an addict ? BTW I'm 6 years off heroin myself and I always hated that aspect of NA or AA meets
@@tristanhobbs1151 In this instance, speaking about it was appropriate. I don't talk about it or think about it unless someone else brings it up. In this case, the youtube algorithm. And no to the AA/NA. I didn't like that they wanted me to believe in god. Funnily enough, I found God years after getting sober anyways.
Hi. Can I ask, did you reduce slowly, or have to quit cold turkey? It seems both are impossible:(((
Pls give me advice
@@onbored9627plss see my question :)
@@giaubrister6008 Personally, I got into treatment at a methadone clinic, and tapered off. I wouldn't recommend it unless you are 100% sure(or as close as you can get to that, you know when you know) you want to quit and won't go back. Methadone is like the last rip cord you can pull, don't pull it if you aren't ready. Or it'll just turn into another addiction or god forbid you'll do both at the same time even and destroy your tolerance and possibly worse.
For everyone struggling, you have people that love you. You'll be fine.
Unfortunately not everyone has people that love them. Maybe the hope of being loved will help someone struggling
@@Bone89the hardest part is when that addiction took away all the people you loved now the addiction is all you have
@@dadon3455I'm so sorry that that happened to you, I hope you're able to see a therapist about it
@@dadon3455Nah, the hardest part is beating that mindset. Still working on it. Keep your head held high and keep fighting. Never give up. It’s worth the effort!!
For people that struggle... we all do struggle sometimes... for people that are lonely... we all feel lonely some times... for people that are quitters... we all have been quitters sometimes... we all people while some are going through it and others don't. The endless circles that define evil and god. Those who create earth... those who destroy... there is only time that will stop us from being what we are, its happening right now right under our eyes. We declining in population at massive rate in the west, because we to busy being sad. We should man up and accept time will end our journey and someday you will die and that day is not today. So give it your best shot and do something meaningfull, even when u struggle, do something that gives purpose. If you can't be happy make someone else happy. Give babys to your girl. Start a family and if you all fuckeduppp still try to give purpose to your life. Giving up is never an option even though noone loves you. Its to give love to get loved. U don't find love in youre life. U create love and if ur mind is not on the right trackk reflect and accept the consequences of your actions. Like the adult u were when u made the choiche. Be the man or woman that is expected of you, not for anyoneelse but yourself.
After 20 years of smoking, I became a non-smoker. I haven't smoked since that day.
He says why you counting etc? I say it so you can quantify your success since that day.what do u say.
Gay
@@ceasercartel7848 are u telling us what u are ??? 👍Good for you.
Good for you, most pointless thing ever.
@@ceasercartel7848😂😂😂😂
Theos answer was actually better and you can see the moment the guy realised this and just carried on with his point anyway 😂
This is powerful I’m almost 8 months sober and no one knows besides my best friends and you guys I tell on RUclips, cuz I don’t need the congrads and I don’t deserve it. I’m just not that person anymore.
Good for you for overcoming your struggle
Said you don't need the congrats, but you definitely deserve it. It's probably hard to believe coming from a random Internet person, but I'm proud of you bro.
So why are you telling anyone?
Keep up the good work 👍
NOOO!!!! YOU AREN'T SUPPOSED TO COUNT THE DAYS!!!1111
I thank God everyday, Im sober, I'm alive and free. Quitting smoking has proven extremely challenging
Just try having a few less smokes throughout the day. Cutting down on anything, as you know, is just a state off mind thing. You kicked alcohol to the curb. Eventually you’ll just be tired of thinking you need a smoke. Ultimately, you’re just filling a void with an activity. That being said, I do, occasionally, enjoy a good smoke! All the best.
@@johnobrien8585Nothing enjoyable about something bad for you
Thank yourself instead, religion is fiction
i was a stoner 5 days ago now i’m not anymore.
You not.done yet
You probably rolling up rn
As someone who's struggling to quit porn, this is actually really good advice. You've got to seperate the addicted identity from yourself otherwise you'll always be counting and failing.
You can do it❤ god bless you
Your identity is God's child. You're a man of God above all. If you've been adopted by The Most High, then there's no identity that this world can give you, or that you can give yourself that prevails over the identity and purpose that God has for you.
@@bodyofhopeso god wants him to be a porn addict?
Know matter what you are going thru just know ur beautiful and God loves you
All the glory goes to him! Amen brother.
Nah
Addiction is not quite that simple
as someone who used to be an addict for many years, it is. Quitting anything is a zero step process, all that shit they preach at AA/NA is straight up bullshit, period. Some people struggle because being addicted to something and hanging out with other addicts is the only identity they ever had. Once you create new identity, quitting is easy. This is from experience.
Why? I find everything said here to be relevant to all addiction. Sober homes and all these step programs exist to help people realign their identity with addiction. They do many other great things too. The social problem, at least in the US is the “virtue” of being sober, celebrating clean days etc. If counting days helps then great, but it doesn’t mean everyone else needs to feel/celebrate it with you. Plenty of people pick up and put down with no issues. So yes it is that simple, the process might not be. 🤷♂️
But it really is, your mind makes it more complicated than it really is to make it easier for you to relapse.
@@FrankiestFrankFrankI feel like you should reflect on what you said, because you kind of contradict yourself.
@@yoboy1988have you ever been addicted to anything before?
My path to sobriety started with 6 weeks off. I was counting days, I had no plans to stop when I got through it. Then I did. If you wanna count days to see if you can make it, do it 🙏
Same here when I quit drinking I told myself I’d go a full month, then the month came and went and I just kept going and the longer I went without it the less appealing it seemed
Jesus Loves you so much! You may not think it but there is a reason you’re seeing this. He wants you to know Him so you Two can have a Relationship:)❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
@@davidd7917 Jesus Loves you so much! You may not think it but there is a reason you’re seeing this. He wants you to know Him so you Two can have a Relationship:)❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Doesn’t mean this advice isn’t bullshit. There is reality and the fantasy of this advice,😂
@@Jesus_Loves_you2499😂 you need mental help
That's me with alcohol. I'm never touching that devils juice again
It's so good bro. Do you want a whiskey?
@@void308🤡☠️
I do count just to see my progress. Almost 2 months sober on alc and I'm very proud of myself
Good for you ~ keep it going!
Been 5 days since you posted this, is it 2 months yet?
@NCMonefaith as of yesterday yes!
He sounds like a clogged vacuum cleaner
I had to go to AA bc I got a DWI. I sat there every day listening to ppl and how they overcame their challenges. But everybody counted the days. 1,000 days, and you still didn't learn.. If you keep up with the past, it will never leave you.
Yeah I counted days too it helps to be able to measure your success. 16 years next week
If you keep up with the past it will never leave you.
That is the quote of 2024
It’s more like you have to keep up with the past because it will never leave you.
@swivk4917 The past has already left, brother. It's up to you to let it be just that. In the past.
@@iitsubliiiminaaaaldifferent mindsets work for different people.
I said this earlier before watching this videos. I drank after 73 days..that was my decision. Now it's my decision to be free. The clean and or free time always went faster when I didn't count.
Why did you drink?
I’m not sure why I drink
@@ryanspangler4569 dig deeper. Insecurities. Shortcomings you may feel you have in life? Lack of self confidence… the list can go on. When i’m actually happy drinking doesnt even cross my mind
It is in your moments of decision, that your destiny is shaped - tony robbins
lol be careful with ol banana hands, I have a guy that was my friend for 20 years and he got heavy into all this Robbin’s shit and it turned him into a complete asshole. Total 180 degrees from the person I knew for two decades. Bizarre and may not have been Tony’s teachings but I’ll tell you, it was all he talked out one side of his mouth while beginning to treat people like trash. Multiple multi year friends abandoned him because of his attitude. Just saying, careful who you follow. We should really only be following Jesus
@@ericredelman2568 sick shallow hal reference my man lol only read 1 book of his a couple years ago was some positive motivation thats all. Sorry about your friend
Here is my experience which can be interesting for all smokers:
I smoked for seven years. By the end I smoked more than one pack a day. I started having panic attacks for all sorts of reasons and I started noticing the triggers. Tobacco was one. The day I realized that I quit cold turkey from night to day. After a couple of years, my anxiety was dealt with pretty much and I wanted to test if I would become addicted to cigarettes again or if I was out. So I smoked a pack of cigarrettes. And I didn't feel anything. It felt empty.
In hindsight, I realize that my consciousness was already on edge which made smoking more enjoyable, more thrilling, more addictive. But it was really myself I was experiencing through the smokes.
People think ciggs make you calmer but it's the opposite. They make you more anxious but for a short period, while smoking, you passify the joneses; but then it increases your anxiety and you'll go right back to your base level which gives you a false sense of reduced anxiety.
Think about it: how does carboration inhaled 'oxygenate' your blood and brain and not make you even more tachycardic? It obviously does so.
The butts no longer did anything to me worth mentioning because my base heart rate and anxiety were in healthy levels and so it didn't hype my conscious state to that adrenaline-esque nicotine pump.
It's not about identity per se. It's about whether you want to be a calm individual that can better face stress or whether you want to have destroyed lungs, poor oxygenated brain, and become less efficatious as you become a more stress sensitive individual. Once you see it you can't unsee it. And the same goes for weed. Even booze and coffee, to be honest.
Coffee is a tax you pay later to stay more active in that moment but it saps your energy on the long run. Likewise, booze interferes with rem sleep which ends up also sapping your energy as you never rest properly.
All these vices are fun on occasion but if you do it regularly it's because you are self-sabotaging. Granted, sometimes we are stuck in ruts often beyond our control. In my experience family disfunctions are the hardest ruts to overcome. It makes you guilty if you overcome them and if not it makes you depressed and anxious.
Damn. Well said friend.
So true about the drinking thing. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen someone from AA post on social media or announce to everyone that they’ve reached 30 days, which is awesome but almost always within a few more days, they’re back on the wagon again. It’s like they needed that validation that they quit for 30 days, achieved that and can now drink normally again.
When I quit I literally stopped keeping track and really only “celebrated” each year. Mostly by thanking my dad for helping me get into a sober living and giving me another shot at life. Other than that I kept that shit to myself.
Good shit keep it up!
My motivation to quit was getting UAs regularly on a 2 year probation sentence, one hot or dilute and it was a violation potentially warranting revocation of probation and straight to DOC for 3-5 years.
Havent really been counting the days but im right around three years sober give or take, only reason i know is because my probation sentence was just completed this week and there was about 8 months of pretrial hearings. Few months shy of three years if my maths check out.
But on that note, quitting was as simple as finally realizing i dont need that shit in my life. It does me no good, lands me in trouble, and after so long i didnt even enjoy it i was just chasing a buzz because thats all my purpose in life was. Chase the buzz and escape the mundane existence.
I gotta say though, i probably never would have gotten sober had i not been arrested and detoxxed for over a month, with the extra motivation of staying out of prison upon getting a 1k PR bond on a felony.
@@100GTAGUY Proud of you! 🌟 I'm going through a similar experience
Thanks tony, I've now realized that I'm no quitter and I'm NEVER gonna quit, because I'm dug in, and I'll never change.
Correct, you either want the drugs or you don't. And often after you stop you'll still want it, just less than you don't want it.
Nah, that’s a shit take. Counting your sobriety adds an additional value to it. It’s recognising how far you’ve come, whilst also increasing your determination to not let it slip for anything.
I like a lot of what Tony says but he made himself sound like any-man here preaching about something he knows nothing about.
honestly. I find that tracking what I'm working on by the days is not only very helpful to keep track, but it's exciting watching the number go up.
I'm all for fully committing to a plight, but sometimes the battle is so hard that signalling the smallest of accomplishments, from the first day of success to the 900th, is purposeful encouragement to thyself, not an expectation to relapse.
I agree, I know the date I stopped drinking, and celebrate the anniversary every year. 14 years next month. It’s not because I will re-start - it’s to show how strong & committed I can be…and what a success it has been.
Yeah Me Robbins should know that people are motivated by positive feedback. And you can’t have a complete identity change over night. Only after stringing some time together, by counting those single days, can you honestly say “I’m not that person anymore”. If you just haven’t smoke crack for 6 days, you’re full of it if you say “That’s no longer who I am”. Your lips are still burnt and you’ve still got callouses on your lighter finger
That’s why changing friend groups AND habits is the best choice…
It works when you want to do something more often as well. I started telling myself i enjoy reading, i am an avid reader. And all the sudden i am addicted to reading, just a month ago it was a chore, now I structure my day around my free time to sit with a good book and my own thoughts. I definitely need to implement this in other aspects of my life.
Keep it up
Struggling with trying to stop vaping currently. That was a nice perspective so thank you.
I think a lot of people keep track to see how far they’ve come, the momentum is motivating
Man this is spot on. When I quit drinking and smoking I just quit. It’s been probably 5 years but I don’t honestly know how long it’s been because I’m not counting, I’m just living my life.
Congratulations. Sobriety can be mysterious. I think the real change happens at such a deep, subconscious level, that often there isn’t really an explanation that you can personally take credit for. I’ve tried probably literally hundreds of times to get clean. Now I’ve been sober for a few years, but it’s not like I was more serious this time than all the other times; I always wanted it, just couldn’t do it. Now I can, and it’s not that hard, but it’s because something changed deep inside me, and it’s not really because of some action I took, or some change I decided to make in my thinking. It’s more like my brain just was finally able to do the math, and now just doesn’t really send me the compulsion to drink or use drugs anymore.
I quit smoking almost 7 years now, close ones still smoke and I can't handle the smoke, the moment I smell it its painful to me, its like my body begging me to get away from this area of hell. it completely changed my life. However, I was far more relaxed while smoking, and it cut my hunger, so quitting made me choose another vice, which was sugar and caffeine. Which causes exponentially higher stress levels, causing mental pain, stress, brain fog, hyper anxiety and so on. But all worth it. It cure my asthma, which I later learned that it was just excessive amount of white mucus accumulation every time i smoked. Nevertheless, a change in identity is far stronger than a change in habits or even willpower. You need to stop and not relate to your addictions anymore. You need to set higher standards for yourself without raising your ego. So it's tough, but it comes with time. Repeat daily until it becomes you, a part of you, your identity.
I used to drink only diet soda with my cheeseburger and fries. I’m not one of those anymore. From this day forward I commit to drinking only pure, full sugar soft drinks. Thank you ❤.
Mocking addiction?
I feel like when you have a bad addiction you just gotta end it and forget it even happened. Don’t count just move on
I appreciate this and it is helpful but addictions do require different mindsets. bless everyone who tries to better their own life.
Agreed but counting days is definitely a bad way to go about quitting things. Nobody would ever suggest counting how many days it has been since you broke up with your ex since it just reminds you of him/her. The same applies to substances, you are going to be way too tempted to go crawling back if you constantly have it on your mind.
@kblack8525
I agree 100%. Quite a few people have asked me, "Why do you still refer to yourself as an "addict" after having over a year clean?" I usually respond with, " the narcotics anonymous program/personal experience has taught me that as soon as I let my guard down and allow myself to believe I'm "cured" and am no longer an addict will be and has been the start of my relapses." Personally, I need to remember that I can and have many times screwed up because I tend to get cocky and arrogant once I accumulate a chunk of clean time, which causes me to forget that my addiction is outside my door at all times doing push ups to be ready to get me again. Idk man sorry for such a long-winded response. It's late as hell here in pittsburgh, and I'm exhausted, so I'm also sorry if it doesn't make much sense, haha😅
People hate on him so much but his talk about consciously thinking about something until it becomes a subconscious habit changed my life
This is why I never wanted to be in NA or AA. I just wanted to quit. Not to spend everyday talking about quiting
I did one session with NA and it was insane, I understand it works for some people, but I just didn’t get it .
I did my last shot of herion on 4-18-19 and have been clean since 4-19-19 and I don't go to NA or AA I just don't use. I remember my clean date as a way to inspire to stay clean, if I get a craving I'll tell myself I've worked to hard for almost 5 years just to fuck it up now.
@@stevebennett9839 completely unrelated to your post. But holy shit time flies, doesn’t feel like 2019 was almost 5 years ago.
@@Me-ri2keof course you didn’t get it, you only went to one meeting
It certainly gets irritating just talking about it and not doing it. Going through the same shit now.
Just sharing not counting, I quit yesterday and today I almost stopped at the store and bought a pack of cigarettes but I told myself why, what if you don't smoke you're going to die. I kept on driving😇.
a win is a win, good on you for driving past the store.
@@saskiasofia thank you. I was three packs a day and from one day to the next zero. At work today I didn't go to the any of the areas where they're smoking and I got me some bubble gum with a soda.
Keep fucking going bro. Even if the cravings come in waves. Just know you’re doing yourself and your health a huge favor. I’m in the same boat you are but it’s been 3 months. I smoked a pack a day. You got this shit bro
@@tad6281 thank you,that's right. I'm changing my daily routine also instead of stopping at the smoke break area and talking to the guys fuk that🤣.
Don't listen to this dude when he says counting is bad. You'll stop counting eventually.
Damn... damn. Addiction sucks. It ain't a disease.. it's a choice. And I chose to keep going back. I'll quit one day. One day soon hopefully. Alcoholism is a bitch.. but I'll beat it. I promise.
This is so true!! I used be an addict and when I stopped I was done. Never went to any meetings or similar. I did not indentify myself as an drug addict anymore.
Good for you, man. Welcome to the causal drug user club.
Congrats bro real shit
Ya man to each their own. Counting wouldn’t be for me but I get that it works for a lot of people
I quit drinking and it changed my life. Almost 7 years off the bottle now.
Why u counting?
@@kieranfoster2734 Why not?
@@WeaponsArcade cos some random guy says so obviously cos people aren’t allowed to know what stage of stopping an addiction
man I'm drinking 18-24 beers a day trying to work full time . I want to quit but withdraw can't sleep and whatever excuse I can come up with
@@jonathandavis3243 It's totally doable. It sucks horribly for like 3 days. But u bounce back quick. Go to a Dr. Or urgent care and explain your situation and they can give you anti seizure meds like kepra, and a few days worth of Ativan to make u more comfortable. Or check into a 7 day detox at rehab, they give u meds so u don't feel like hammered crap.
Tony is right. I was counting every day, and even every year after, I quit smoking. I finally lost count around 8 years in and stopped trying to keep count. I still haven't smoked to this day.
So he’s not right because you didn’t smoke for those years you were counting.
seems like evidence to the contrary.
In all honesty it sounds like incredible advice, but in reality it's just ok advice.
You absolutely should adopt the mindset that "I'm not a smoker/drinker/pill popper/nail bitter/ whatever it is"
But to insinuate that counting is inherently failing is going too far.
I recently gave up smoking again after having thought I had succeeded last year(lasted 4 months before remission).
This time I counted the first 4-5 days and then started to lose track. I think I'm around 2 weeks now.
Counting those first few days was helpful because I felt unnerved and uncomfortable. I needed to remind myself why I felt so anxious and why it was important for me to fight the urges. I knew that every day it would get a little bit easier.
I still have the occasional strong desire to smoke, but it's my knowledge of just how detrimental that "just one puff" is that gives me the perspective to say "I don't smoke"
For a long time I wanted so badly to be an occasional smoker. I had to have that remission to learn that it's just not the case. If I allow myself to smoke once a month it will lead to once a week, which will lead to once a day and so on and so forth.
@@farfromirrational948 every time I had a withdrawal from smoking I would hold my breath for 20-30 seconds, I would get a headrush every time I did it. It was about 3 months of withdrawals but after that I never had the urge to smoke and it’s been 11 years, I never counted the days but I know the date because it was a New Year’s resolution
That's a very good point! I'm going to stop counting. Celebrating every year does convey a message that I'm counting like I'm going to start again instead of just using a new identity to stop for good.
I believe this I've been sober awhile now lost count n still going strong 💪
This is how we need to treat sin as Christians.
This is how we need to treat christians as sinners
You’ll sin regardless tho
@@SlickRick12what a shitty argument
@@SlickRick12everybody sins but some repent
Everyone is a sinner, every Christian deserves hell but it is only because Jesus died on the cross for us that our sins are forgiven. Not our works, or what we’ve accomplished but the love of Jesus dying for us and our sins.
People in AA and NA need to hear this!
I have stopped smoking lately and i totally agree with him about not counting the days , i have tried to quit smoking before but this time is just different, one day i was a smoker, the next day i wasn't anymore, i'm no longer a smoker , it's was that simple to do , just needed a little focus and conviction
We count days not for ourselves but for the newcomer.
Exactly!
U count for the clout.just say it’s been a while.
We count days cause we say one day at a time .
It helps me know how far I've came
What
Tony Robbins is soooooo inspiring his stepson was at a behavioral modification place when he was a teen. Knew him I was there. Courage family right Tony ? Sit down
I could listen to Tony Robbins speak everyday for the rest of my life
2 packs a day. Quit cold turkey. Quit making excuses and just do it. Discipline yourself and hold yourself accountable
That’s such a good point “Why are you counting, to tell people how long you went before starting again”
I love that man honestly he’s probably the most genuinely good man we got.
This is so true. I quit alcohol then years later I quit weed. This is after decades of daily use. I just kept in mind that it doesn't have anything for me. It's just not who I am anymore. It doesn't work out for me when I use it. Some people can use and be okay. I can't. Nothing good happens when I use it. I'm not the type of person that benefits from weed or alcohol. I changed the way I feel about it by seeing the truth.
He’s wrong. I quit smoking 23 years ago and will never go back, but I’m still a smoker. My body remembers the addiction. One smoke and I’d be right back where I was 23 years ago.
That’s why I never understood people counting days of sobriety. That just seems like torture lol
Im 22 now and ive been smoking since i was 14, started smoking weed at 15 and i gotta tell you addiction is a bitch its hard to go even a single day without smoking something but i try as hard as I can to only smoke once a day now, I know thats still not good but im trying
exactly which is why cold turkey is the only way to go (provided its safe medically of course)