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@@skoopdiddywoop8565 Did you actually watch the video? Or are you venting your frustrations? It's always funny when someone insults another for no reason.
I’m just discovering your channels. And I avoid the videos that will have spoilers for my favorite franchise. I was wondering if you would please do a video analysis of 127 hours? I would really value your insight there. I think you would be really talented at doing this for war movies. I’m a navy veteran and I think your talent with words would be really helpful for a lot of people.
Dude's powers literally correlates with his mental state. Guy bottles up everything until he can't anymore then explodes and destroys everything around him and then he bottles it up again and the cycle repeats.
That's what leads to believe that the manifestation of Comp V is tied to personality even trauma ( in Butcher and Hughie's case it's a bastardization of Homelander and A-Train respectively ).
I think a lot of people are missing something between that interaction between Soldier Boy and Homelander. When Homelander tells Soldier Boy that" I am you", Soldier Boy then replies "I know you're an f***ing disappointment", he's not just telling Homelander that, he's also acknowledging his own failings as a person, perhaps even a "hero". This is something that's worth looking into, maybe even doing the deep dive on.
I feel like maybe if he was a stronger person, he’d have had a heart to heart talk with his son and tell him to avoid the mistakes he made. I think that what this show is trying to say is that people like “Captain America” are rare and most people (especially those not in tune with their emotions) would end up like homelander and his father if given the power.
Looking for love in all the wrong places. The need for a father's approval. Loneliness, fear, despair, anger, hate. Sex, narcotics, alcohol, violent bullying as coping mechanisms.......... All these negative traits will drive a person to do horrible things and creates monsters. This is the core of this show. It's basically psychoanalysis done as an interesting story.
I absolutely love this breakdown of Soldier Boy. He was a great addition to Season 3. His actor was amazing. The twist with Homelander was brilliant and I really hope Soldier Boy returns next season. Something I would also point out in Soldier Boy's character is that his father called him a disappointment and when Soldier Boy confronts Homelander he copies what his father said to him by calling Homelander a disappointment. But ironically Homelander breaks that cycle with his own son Ryan. Homelander doesn't think Ryan is a disappointment he shows affection towards him something neither Soldier Boy or Homelander had as children themselves
SB calling homelander a disappointment after homelander tells him “i’m you” is the first thing i noticed when watching this episode the first time. but i never thought about how homelander is the one breaking the curse! it feels so weird to have sympathy for homelander but wow, he really is striving to create the family he never had and always wanted
@@theriveroftruth agree, tbh its hard for people to understand this cause Homelander has doing awful things and threats everyone arround him like sh*t, But Vogue its the real villain, they created this monster, they Let him do all their dirty work and cover His fckups, they are far More cold hearted and dangerous cause even if Homelander and all the 7 dissapears, Vogue would still exist, changing names, changing people, rebranding etc but the core would be the same, doing whenever It takes to make a profit
Homelander has spent no time being a parent, and wants a family at this moment in the show. Ryan will have to continue to be meek to keep Homelanders interest over time.
You probably missed it, but in that case Soldier boy realizes he and Homelander are the same - both pathetic, and that his father was right about him and in dealing with him the way he did, and so tells Homelander off the way his father did.
Soldier Boy's issues stem from his relationship with his father. Growing up all he wanted was his father's approval but he could never get it. So he signed up for compound V and became the world's greatest superhero and became a war hero thinking finally he will have his father's approval. Instead he father said he wasn't a man because he took a short cut and cheated. His father would then proceed to call him a disappointment.
@MrPolicekarim Yeah, he took a shortcut to get where he is but he doesn't have solider boy's toxic side. Both are, I would say masculine characters but one is more toxic. (btw, when I mean toxic, I mean in personality, not being masculine.)
HL: "Weak? I'm you." SB: "I know. You're a ****ing disappointment." Such a good scene. Solider Boy is actively critiquing not only Homelander but himself as well in that particular scene. He developed as a character quite well over the course of S3 I just wish he had more screen time.
Fun Fact: One of the reasons Jensen Ackles was cast as Soldier Boy was because he was the runner up to play Captain America in the MCU. And - obviously - Soldier Boy is a dark pastiche of Captain America.
Where did you get this info from?.. Jensen already stated that he got the job due to his relation with the director being that Supernatural came from the same creator.
No he didn't you can't just say random things as facts. The actor himself stated it was his friendship to Erik krepke. Also stated some of the scenes were written solely so Erik could mess with him
Soldier Boy is, in my opinion, exactly what a real life Wolverine would be like. Perhaps less obnoxious but just as indifferent to the world & traumatized. We're talking about dealing with 3 times the amount of loss & pain the average human being has to endure, the brain washing, amnesia & physical trauma & that heavily invasive body wide surgery of molten metal being fused to his entire skeleton. No wonder in Logan this man wanted to die, which actually was his motivation in the last two films (Logan & The Wolverine) but at least he overcomes it in the Wolverine to be a hero. It just seems like a grueling, unfair existence. even his powers invoke a painful nature as his claws cut through his hands every time they're deployed. If any veteran has a right to snort & drink whatever drugs he wants, it would be Wolvie 😂
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 not as much as I'd like to. My introduction to Wolverine was through Hugh Jackman. Before that I knew of him, was even a fan of the X-Men tv series & some comics as kid but it wasn't til his cinematic portrayal I found him compelling & actually cool. Before that I seen him as another boring rank as Cyclops lol
@@GangstaStan010 Logan in Ultimate X-Men is a total tool. He constantly hits on Jean and students alike, and takes no issue killing another member of the team, while simultaneously acting holier-than-thou with anything related to him.
I’ve always thought that Soldier Boy is a mix between Captain America, Homelander and Wolverine. But really just Wolverine and Homelander in terms of personality. Also, both him and Wolvie are giga chads🔥
I usually don't like the word "Toxic Masculinity" because it is sometimes used as a weapon to shut down an argument without having a genuine conversation. I also don't like how people frame all masculine traits as toxic. However, SB is the true case of Toxic Masculinity where it not only harms the people around him but himself as well. I've dealt with such father for my entire life while I was more of a emotional type of person. I was taught not to cry and got physically punished when I showed any hint of weakness ... kind of like Butcher. The constant struggle to "not be a pu**y" kept me stressed and anxious until I realized that I can't change myself nor even need to. My father seemed to suffer from it since everyone around him feared him and never showed their emotional towards him making him lonely. He became much loose as he aged and became more emotional. I find him to be a better father and a better man these days than ever before.
Totally agree. I think soldier boy is a hyper -extreme version of toxic masculinity. The problem I have with the term is it's used as a blanket descriptor for anything someone doesn't like about a man. Sometimes people are just jerks, has nothing to do with some perceived level of masculinity, toxic or otherwise.
yes I agree that's why I said toxic toughness as it is pushed on us all to just keep working or fighting and not think. I think it is a real thing we all have to deal with. what society says is strong and weak. Tank you for sharing. I think Butcher is a good example of how he feels deeply and is tough is a different way.
'Toxic masculinity' is post modernist language and should not be used by any serious person. The term has an agenda which is made clear by the fact that 'toxic femininity' is not a term that is used. That ideology is doing a great job of degrading our language.
One of my favourite moments of the entire season is Soldier Boy's lip quiver when younger Grace Mallory tells him that his macho act never really works with women. That every woman is either humoring him or afraid of him. He shoots back with something smug about her getting a man, but that lip quiver lets the audience know that he knows she's right.
I mean, there are probably women that did sleep with him totally because they wanted too, for clout or money or because they genuinely found him attractive, not all though, which he's likely aware of, which is why it bothers him
I'm glad you clarified during this video that it's not only a male issue and the issue isn't exactly masculinity it's toxicity itself that morphs people's perceptions of masculinity
First off, love the show version of Solider Boy, because he's the complete opposite of the comic, who was a absolute coward, plus, he has a actual character here. Secondly, not gonna lie, my first immediate thought of your Soldier Boy cosplay was Nightwing lol
@@dr_cachetes6822 I can't remember him going into a fight which would put him in actual danger or facing any conflict. This is just the impression I got, he either evades or explodes, both not very brave strategies. But maybe I just forgot about a scene that would prove me wrong.
@@petraw9792 fighting Homelander was actually dangerous, and so was hunting down that psychic guy, so Soldier Boy is not a coward. Like the video maker said, having the be tough mentality makes for good soldiers, even if it does make them less of a healthy person.
Thanks so much for this analysis, Georgia. There's a difference between being strong and being toxic, and men should feel more able to express their emotions in a healthy way without fear of being emasculated by society.
Society will emasculate men regardless of if their "toxic" or not. Modern society wants everyone, regardless of gender, to be the same carbon copy generic human
Anecdotal as it may be, I've been put down by women just as much as I have by other men for showing emotion when I had rough times. I went through the worst year and a half of my life (father died, mother attempted suicide in front of me, was stalked for couple months then almost killed by an uncle with a meth/mental health problem, and my best friend died in an ATV accident all within a 10 month period) and barely anyone in my personal life, man or woman, wanted anything to do with because I, and I quote, was "a fucking crybaby". It's an issue for sure but some act like it's an issue only men need to work on. It's an issue we all need to work on together so things can improve.
One of the big issues that isn't discussed when talking about men opening up about their emotions is that when men do, they are often taken advantage of by others. This is why a lot of men put up these barriers, because there have been times when they trust someone and let them in, only for that trust to be betrayed.
Soldier Boy was my new favorite character and villain from The Boys. I go back and forth on him, when watching the show, I pitied him and was disappointed how he was disposed of in the season finale.I can understand him when it comes to be betrayed and plus Jensen Ackles acting. However while Homelander is worse, Soldier Boy isn't a saint and some of the worst I have seen of people IRL up close I see in Soldier Boy which makes it unnecessarily complicated
When all soldiers lay their weapons down Or when all kings and all queens relinquish their crowns Or when the only true messiah rescues us from ourselves It's easy to imagine There will be sorrow Yeah, there will be sorrow And there will be sorrow no more - sorrow, bad religion
Ya that’s true you can’t especially in the military where others rely on each and team work is important. Also some times you need to act tuff or put up a brave face for others.
I think its one of the biggest "conspiracies" of culture where other people would control the definition of manhood. A narrow definition of manhood that excludes feelings thus excludes listening to your inner voice. This makes one more "useful" to others (like fighting someone else's war.)
or humanities natural predators and other things its probubly only resent historically that we don't have to "fear" animals attacks, yes they still happen but rarely, this world will give you lots of reasons to shutdown you emotions because sometimes they get in the way, so you shut them down, but its harder to get them back
Also notice how when Hughie confronts him on his own perceived weakness; that being that he isn’t “man” enough and lied about being in World War 2, he punches Hughie in the face.
I think an additional point is an unwillingness to change. While Soldier Boy overall is abusive and abrasive, a lot of his thinking comes from his time. He’s used to the old America and he doesn’t accept the new America because it’s simply too different for him to grasp it. Despite him looking in his middle age, he’s over a century old, born in 1919. While it’s considered toxic masculinity now, it was considered the norm for him.
The unwillingness to change part really drives it home. He blows up downtown by accident and says he feels bad for it then does it again and again and again. He got betrayed by his Team because of how he treated them then does it again with the next group. He realizes his father's wrongdoing and is wholeheartedly resentful of his past then projects the exact same sentiment on his own child. Considering all that and going back to his monologue in the forest it really stands out to me " What do i do when im sad or scared or whatever? Fcking Nothing" He admits it completely unintentionally and sadly hughie doesn't pick up on it . Its so interesting on so many levels to me
@@herrsiemes7094 well he didn’t have that power until he was captured. And he had PTSD so hearing that Russian song made him activate it, he has the excuse for that one. The rest not really but they were casualties because he was hunting his team down even though they only did it because they were tired of his abuse
Yea this guy is actually toxic masculinity. He should be the definition. I hate it when people use the phrase for any little thing a guy does, but this.... THIS character is actually toxic
@@jeyrm nobody has ever gotten mad at you for opening a door and if someone does get mad at you for that don't give them any attention, go on about your day, Opening a door for someone isn't toxic
I study sociology for a while, I hated it, but something that stock with me was "Being a man is not a gender, it's a title" It's something that one must earn, recognition by completing social challenges, from not showing emotions to acting wrecles, etc. And yes, it's as wrong and as enfuriating as it sounds
What is acting wreckes? And If you think masculinity is wanted by not showing emotions then that’s unfortunate. The most badass men have their vulnerable moments and cry. There’s a difference between a man being vulnerable sometimes and being a total wimp.
I haven’t cried in nearly 4 years. I remember when I would cry over my mothers death I was told to man up a lot. I didn’t even cry when I lost the sight in my eye. I was sent to therapy and was diagnosed with some kind of anger issues, ptsd and depression. I used to bite my tongue hard when I felt sad because it would take away the need to cry
You are such a breath of fresh air. your "rant" about what angers you??? gave me life. thank you. I will be rewatching this. you are a bright spot Miss Georgia. thank you.
I can actually relate to this breakdown. Some men that I've known were exactly like him. While I was getting through adolescence I developed some of this behaviors too. But once I grew up an adult and I realized what were the root causes I was able to reconcile with my emotions and manage them to get a more satisfying and balanced way of life. First steps first: It always starts by recognizing we got something to heal and having the will to get through that way.
I love how you didn't try to make it political and actually stripped the gender off of the concept for most of the video. You really seem to be looking at the problem from an angle of understanding people and helping them. As a man who has struggled with some aspects of "Toxic Toughness", I find that most people who discuss this issue don't really care about it and push either one of 2 ideas "masculinity/men = bad" or "toxic toughness is good and the only way to get ahead in life". Thank you! You seem like a geniunely caring person.
this means so much to me as this is what I hoped to accomplish. I hope that you find your balance and be the best you for you. Thank you for taking the time to comment and share it meant a lot to me.
One thing that soilder boy knows is that him feeling will slow him down but cos he never takes a second to stop he never takes a second to feel so no he's running in an endless circle of "keep going, you can feel later when the job is done." But in he's mind his job is never done so he'll always be this way
You are the first therapist I have ever seen that said it is okay if you are not a ball of emotion all the time. If every therapist just says you are toxic and broken if you do not break down and cry all the time, it makes it rather hard to seek help if you need it. As you said, as long as you are not cutting out a piece of yourself or denying what you truly feel, being stoic is not a negative thing. Oh, and I much prefer the term Toxic Toughness. That term really describes the issue far better as well as removing the sexist stigma, allowing woman to accept and seek help if they notice this issue within themselves.
Thanks I am happy you enjoyed the video and watched it all the way through. I hope it helps others be more of themselves and live happier lives. Thanks for being a part of of my community
I really enjoy the representation of generational trauma and issues being passed down in the boys, MM, Butcher, Soldier Boy, Homelander and Ryan all have ties to it and its sad but very engaging
@@charzanboo9940 They were referring to characters who are suffering generational trauma. The only female character in The Boys going through generational trauma that I can think of is Staright, as most of the other female characters struggle with something else.
The ironic thing about soldier boy that he wants to have family too, it's visible that he actually wants to accept Homelander, but he can't, because of this limiting concept of being a manly man.
I'll be honest, I hate the term "toxic masculinity", too often it's an attack on masculinity and men (which society seems to be attacking), always too one sided by those with woke thoughts, regardless of it's definition. Toxic toughness is a much better term imo, it's not so 'woke' (which is toxic itself). I will say though life centuries ago was tougher, so I guess the whole "toughness" thing was a way of survival (if the attitude was even a thing then).
I do agree that the term can come across as being anti-men, but however I still think it's a good descriptor beyond its surface level misinterpretation. This pattern of behavior is something society expects of men specifically, and is intertwined with men's role in society and all issues related to gender roles. So I think at the end of the day toxic masculinity is still a fitting term.
Now I might just be an "um ackchuyally" guy but honestly last I checked that was just unironic machismo. Soldier boy is just struggling to hold up his ideal of what is macho. Of what he is supposed to represent.
It’s definitely a real thing as is toxic femininity (Amber Heard’s a great example), but the term is thrown around so carelessly anymore that people are either having trouble taking it seriously because anything that’s “too masculine” for any particular person can labeled as toxic or they aren’t taking it serious enough to the extent of ignoring the issue when it’s right in front of them. This is one of the issues with trending terms is that it’s much easier to succumb to herd mentality and collectively label entire groups of people as the same than to put in the work necessary to judge people based on individual merits. Groups certainly have their place but in today’s modern social climate it can be frighteningly easy for someone to lose their own thoughts to the others around them.
Could you do a video about Guts from Berserk? He is such a great and complex character. I think that with your background you would be able to dissect his traumas better than most people.
I hope we get to see a redemption arc for Soldier boy in Season 5 where he finally confronts his feelings of inadequacy and actually becomes the hero for once, and prove his worth. Then maybe raise Ryan since Butcher will definitely die along with Homelander
I think people confuse not feeling emotions and not letting your emotions rule over your actions. I actually went through the inverse problem. Throughout school I was told how I should be feeling and in touch with my emotions, but as I grew older, I was better able to keep them in check. I thought something was wrong with me. But this control is a byproduct of maturity, age, and also somewhat being a man. I have an easier time keeping a cool head than some other man and most women when shit hits the fan. Doesn’t mean I don’t feel the emotions. It just means I prefer to be a steady rock for everyone to hold on to instead of adding to the chaos.
It is a good rant. As I had to explain to a friend that toxic masculinity does not say masculinity is toxic. It is the same as toxic waste or toxic chemicals. Good point on the fact that it hurts them as well as the people around them.
The one thing that struck me in the exchange between Homelander and Soldier Boy was the “but I’m you.” “I know. A disappointment.” Maybe I’m giving a benefit of the doubt because I like Jensen Ackles, but to me it seemed like in that moment there was a degree of self awareness by Soldier Boy, that he was disappointed in himself and that his son became like him. It doesn’t change that he is a reprehensible person, but it seemed like a moment of clarity, even if he took the low road from it rather than the high one
@@michaelriddick7116 if they’re not happy with who they themselves are, I think so. I genuinely had the impression that Soldier Boy might have made a decent dad because he seemed determined not to repeat the mistakes of his father, and thought that was why he reacted so negatively with Homelander once he believed it was already too late (otherwise why bother reaching out in the first place?). Of course, his negativity led him to conclude it was too late, and so still handled it wrong. Though again, I fully admit that liking the actor (Supernatural fan) might be causing me to give the character benefits of the doubt he doesn’t deserve
8:30, I think you missed the wider context a little, Soldier Boy was repeating the same line his father said to him when he found out he was a super hero instead of a real soldier.
Strange as it sounds, dealing with constant high stress situations is far easier than confronting the PTSD that it comes with. When you deal with convicts trying to shank you or fellow officers is par for the course, when you're on alert 100% for hours at a time it's hard to wind down from the mentality.
Helps me understand in the end why he rejects his son because he sees his attention seeking as weakness, like he is projecting how his own dad talked down to him of not being good enough.
It's paradoxical that Homelander (who did some of the worst things, even worse than the ones Soldier Boy did) knows what he wants in terms of his feelings, while Soldier Boy doesn't, he just represses that part with alcohol and drugs.
I absolutely love how much you advocate for the toxic male. Not in the sense that you encourage their toxicity but in the sense that you made so much of this video about how they are victims too. In a way that honestly I think would permeate. Society creates them and they are not better off for that.
Great breakdown! One little thing to note -- and apologies if it's already been mentioned -- "Bennies" does not refer to benzodiazepines. That class of drug definitely does not wire you to the gills, and the first one, Librium, wasn't even discovered until 1958. "Bennies" is a colloquialism for Benzedrine, a strong amphetamine widely used and abused through the early and mid 20th century. It pops up all the time in old Burroughs and Ginsberg works. It's not made anymore, but it was essentially pharmaceutical meth. I don't think bourbon and meth with his burger speaks any more highly of his mental stability, mind you 😅
Thanks for posting. I did not realize he was referring to Benzedrine. I'm now curious if it was common at any time in history to crush the pills like he does. When I saw the scene, I just assumed it was because he wanted the altered effect but now I'm wondering if that could have also been one of the prescribed ways to consume the medication in the 1920s, 1940s, etc.
The self-awareness of Soldier Boy when he calls Homelander a disappointment was really jarring. He’s messed up, and he knows it, but still behaves the way he does. I don’t know if that makes him scarier or not, but it’s really cool how they wrote his character.
I think you doing analyses on characters in The Batman Animated Series would be awesome. So many psychologically deep characters that carry all too human issues. It was doing all this before The Boys, and it was considered a kid show to boot.
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 I am sure they do, and she can arrange moments for such based on her schedule. I was simply giving a recommendation because characters in The Batman Animated Series, such as Two Face and Mr. Freeze, show how you properly write villains in an animated series. You give them reasoning as to how they turned out that way to begin with.
I just came to see a take on Soldier Boy... i didnt expect to get faced with my own failure! Good god this hit deep. I saved it. I need to work on myself. Thank you Georgia!!!!!
Being autistic it was more or less impossable for me to emathize with Soldier Boy, but your video did explain why. So thank you for that. There is one thing I found interesting, however, He was able to back up a lot of his claims of being tough by actually taking on multiple supes. This is something even Homelander couldn't do. This isn't do discredit your analysis, but I think does add a layer of complxity to it becoming a, "But at what cost," scenario. And this would be in the best of cases where someone is able to back up their, so called, toughness. in most cases it just destroys the person in question.
Yes I think that adds to his character and the danger involved. Though for educational purposes and teaching people what they are dealing with in maladaptive behaviours it isn't as applicable to real world scenarios. Though yes your point is taken, thanks for the comment
Oh man that one cuts deep.I saw parts of my childhood in this arc and boy I’m happy to have learned a bit about introspection and emotional intelligence along the way. In my experience and from soldier boys description of his childhood in a hostile/ unstable upbringing it is all to easy to succumb to those negative emotions that brew in that type of environment under that sort of pressure and you end up making it everyone else’s problem without even realizing it.
I don't really see why some people are so attracted to toxic masculinity; the kind of masculinity where they expect you to bottle up your emotions instead of expressing them. What's "weak" about having emotions like a human being? What is so strong with being an emotionless robot? When I was a kid, my role models were guys like Batman (Michael Keaton version), Son Goku, Luke Skywalker, Spider Man, Domon Kasshu, James Raynor, men who were not afraid to be emotional, but still used their powers for good. James Raynor expressed his raw anger at his ex-girlfriend Sarah Kerrigan when Sarah murdered Raynor's Protoss buddy Praetor Fenix. The same thing went for Son Goku when his foes such as Freeza and King Piccolo killed his friends; his anger manifested into raw power that allowed him to win his battles. Domon Kasshu wasn't afraid to be emotional in battles, nor was he afraid to confess his love to his girlfriend Rain Mikamura in their final battle against the Devil Gundam. Luke Skywalker openly showed his love and mercy for Darth Vader in Return of the Jedi, even as Vader was trying to kill him. Heck, I'm also a big fan of Darth Vader, and Vader's all about giving in to his emotions and letting out that raw power that comes from it instead of bottling it in like some Jedi. We even saw from his life as a Jedi on how bottling up his emotions as his masters taught him to had a negative effect on poor Anakin Skywalker. The Michael Keaton Batman had a wide range of emotions, and we see how he deals with them and how he evolves into a more complete person as he fights back against the man who killed his parents while saving the innocent from the same fate. Spider Man in the films and in the 90s cartoon also expressed a wide range of emotions, from guilt, to loss, to hope, and that helped us sympathize with him as he fought his way through both work AND supervillains. Holding in all that emotion will just end with men having PTSD or some other unfortunate fate. Either they'll end up exploding sometime when they're not supposed to, or they'll end up destroying themselves with emotional damage as they hold in their emotions instead of expressing them. They wind up having to turn to booze, whores, drugs, smoking, or some other harmful vice to drown their sorrows and ease their pain, which will end up exacerbating their condition or accelerating their demise. You'd think that with all these cases of men self-destructing due to them holding in their emotions, that people would stop encouraging them to hold it in and see emotion as weakness. Emotion is as much a part of the human experience as eating or breathing. And seeing a part of the human experience as weakness is, quite frankly, disturbing, as if we expect men to be perfect gods who can't feel pain, sorrow, or loss. If that isn't misandry, then I don't know what is.
unpopular opinion,I have embraced this mechanism ( detaching from emotions while around people ), a few months now I'm doing well, no drama or non needed bs! yet I still hear my self and my inner voice when I'm alone I can consider it all but out to the public and ppl , it is working fine. will give updates in future but for now it's working fine and I know it seems unhealthy but it's really working !
This doesn't seem maladaptive, to know your emotions but to have control over them can be useful and helpful. To not know how you feel and to push others away out of fear is unhealthy. It is fine to be at a distance when it is suitable for you as long as you could let people in if you saw them as worth it. I hope it keeps working = )
Good analysis Georgia. This brings me to why it matters so much to young men / boys to have a good father figure. My father taught me. Father's discipline while seems harsh is great way for boys to learn. I.e. take Odin and Thor...my dad was same way. He always held me accountable for my actions but let me realize and see the wisdom of his fatherly lessons. I had to come to it not with aid, but because I learned. Because real life you don't get second chances usually. As a man you learn self-reliance, but also the value of true male friendship. To ask for help when you need it, but also to strive to accomplish things on your own. You have to be grown man and deal with your poor choices. Being a man is not about being macho or even fighting, but about being responsible man, doing the right thing, being courageous in dealing with issues, facing your fears, being true to yourself and standing up for what you believe in. Treating others with respect. Seeing a person's character before anything else. Help those who are being bullied or being picked on. These are good qualities of masculinity. I think the same applies for women too as there are toxic things women do that impact their daughters.
At first when i got the notification for this video i saw "toxic masculinity" I was like oh man here we go a talk about how guys should be more feminine. But once again Doc you exceeded my expectations with a good reaction.
Its because they were vulnerable once and that was used against them so usually they make their decisions "no more". Solution is to make them realize that you are different from the people who hurt them.
I actually relate to this very much. That’s probably why he’s one of my favorite characters in the show and I hope he’s in season 4. This show is so good
I know you’re a therapist and will say why As a teen and now I used to have a hard time expressing sadness because i believe it a sign of weakness to show sadness and half my family member keep bringing back on thinking “put your pride aside and show some feeling “ I just don’t the only feeling I’ll express are anger and happy. Sadness and doubt on the other hand I don’t Still love soldier boy I just wish I had his ability to not care what people think
It is always very disheartening when I hear that someone has had to cut out an emotion out of themselves. Usually thats because someone in their parental hierarchy taught them it wouldn't be accepted or that it caused the family damage. So they cut this part out of themselves to survive but it then becomes maladaptive. I hope you do someday find access to your sadness. it is yours and precious. thank you for sharing and helping others who may be feeling the same
Some of the points you made in this video hit hard. Amazing analysis, as usual, probably the best take on toxic masculinity I've ever seen. Love your videos.
I completely agree with you about the toxic masculinity. That's why Frenchie and MM are thr best, they're the exact opposite. Can you react to one of them next?
No such thing as “toxic masculinity” Real masculinity is beautiful and self sacrificing, bridled strength, fighting for loved ones, care/devotion and making real hard decisions and taking hits and demoralization and keep moving forward This character represents the lack of real masculinity in a masculine body. Unbridled Strength
"when we talk about toxic masculinity we talk about its effect on everyone around" no. that's by design. toxic masculinity is not a real thing and what people refer to is the reason you didn't get incinerated by genetic superfreaks combined with shit that doesn't happen. then when the idea of "toxic femininity" comes up its portrayed as something cute and harmless and selfless. its a backhanded criticism. its framed as a criticism but isnt really. "you're denying yourself the ability to feel" maybe he doesn't WANT to feel or talk about feelings or wear pretty pretty dresses and mommy's lipstick. maybe he DOES feel but doesn't announce how he feels all the time. you can't just have your characters announce how they feel. that makes me feel angry. "that society and media has done" yeah its because he saw it on tv. maybe you haven't considered that men aren't defective women?
She is not asking men to be women. She is saying that, man or woman, it is important to be in tune with and aware of one's emotions, and to properly process them. Avoidance of emotion prevents processing, and can keep oneself from growing holistically.
I appreciate you making this video. It gave me a bit of insight on why I truly felt for Soldier Boy as a character even though to the naked eye he seems like such a cruel and selfish individual. The environment I grew up normalized toxic masculinity. To not show emotions, to not ask for help, to avoid allowing anyone to know you completely because of that feeling of weakness and vulnerability. It took me years, about 27 years old and I am now 32 years old, for me to actually allow myself to not see things so black and white, and understand that the the things I saw as "weak" were part of being human. And in all honesty, it took a kind hearted woman I was dating to help me see that. If she didn't hate or betray him, I think Crimson Countess would have done the same for Soldier Boy.
@Gus Mackenzie True, but that's up for speculation. I mean, look at what she turned out to be even after Soldier Boy's capture. Not much of a threat to people or anything close to the more modernized Supes we see. I don't think she's inherently evil, or evil at all.
Just want to point out that Soldier Boy is not doing benzos, he's doing benzedrine. Totally different. He's using speed essentially, that's why he says "we were jacked to the gills"
Maybe it's overanalyzing, but I think it's interesting that in the scene between Dean Winch... I mean Soldier Boy ( ;) ) and Homelander, when Homelander says "what do you mean weak? I'm you" and Soldier Boy doesn't say "no, you're not" or "you're weaker" or anything like that. He says "I know" and then adds Homelander is a disappointment. But that "I know" feels like deep down Soldier Boy knows there's something wrong with him, maybe he sees everything that was wrong with him, within Homelander. "I'm you" "I know, you're a disappointment". It has vibes of Spider-Man-Tony Stark "I wanted to be like you" "And I wanted you to be better". But I don't know, maybe I'm reading too much. But the choice of words in that scene was interesting.
Loved this Vid and agree on a lot of the things you pointed out. I loved the Soldier Boy character. Because he was both entertaining and represented sum of the things I avoided becoming like. Validating and understanding your emotions is very important! Although, I have to admit there was certain aspects of his character I found worthy of respecting. Like him being willing to keep his side of the deal to help kill Homelander.
Imagine the existential dread in seeing that, even without your presence in their life, your son apparently inherited all of the bad things your father pointed out in you and feeling like you’re just bad product…? It’s happening to Ryan. It happened to Homelander. It happened to Soldier Boy. Heck, I’m not even surprised if Soldier Boy’s father was experienced the same. It’s just a terrible cycle that ironically none of them are strong enough to break.
One facet of this video I found interesting was the notion of cutting out emotions leading to you not recognizing your needs. Possibly and over share but throughout my childhood I was given both overt and subtle messages my feelings or wants were a problem or not a priority. While I did have a period of immense apathy I recognize why I'm like this, and what my needs and wants are. However even the councilor I briefly saw said that while I cognitively have a great grasp of what's wrong and why I think the way I do. Even he was baffled how to get my emotional awareness or even emotions at all to the same level. Don't know if that is common, sign of a larger issue, etc. Just thought I'd share.
The cause being overt and subtle messages is very common. It is how we unconsciously learn what is expected of us and how to behave. This is why many people are missing out on their emotions and what their needs on. There are techniques which can help you get both on the same level but it does take a certain amount of work and effort but it is really worth it in the end. I am happy you are out of apathy it is a really horrible feeling
@@GeorgiaDow yeah, wish it had not come via the breakdown from realizing just how much I'd become like my own abuser. However I'm deeply grateful that I woke up earlier in my life, at the very least it prevented me from continuing such behaviors.
It's so interesting watching Jensen Ackles go from Dean Winchester to Soldier Boy. Both characters have so much trauma and were crafted into little soldiers in some ways, but the biggest difference is how they both came out of it and the paths they chose. Dean Winchester sometimes does fall into some toxic traits but he's not afraid to express some emotions. Usually he's very much "I'm fine. I don't know what you're talking about" because of how he was raised, but instead of mocking and teasing people who do show their emotions like Soldier Boy has done in this video, Dean listens and allows that person to tell him how they're feeling. I think what made Dean much softer than Soldier Boy is Dean had to raise his younger brother, Sam, and we see in flashbacks in Supernatural how protective Dean was of Sam's innocence in the beginning and how he still is protective of Sam. I would actually love to see an analyst of the Supernatural characters if that's possible! 😊
The term 'Toxic Masculinity' has been so heavily associated w/ liberal crybaby-ism that I've completely given up on it. They're man children now, clowns, and I think the show makes 'very' clear that Soldierboy is just as much an actor for masculinity as Homelander is for virtue. He simply likes the aesthetic of being tough without doing anything he thinks gets him there, when in reality he is heavily traumatized by his own abusive father's neglect.
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Oh! This was a wonderful video! I’ll be right there! Has been some shows/videos that shows toxic femininity too! I don’t know the movies though…
Finally!
@@skoopdiddywoop8565 Did you actually watch the video? Or are you venting your frustrations? It's always funny when someone insults another for no reason.
I’m just discovering your channels. And I avoid the videos that will have spoilers for my favorite franchise. I was wondering if you would please do a video analysis of 127 hours? I would really value your insight there. I think you would be really talented at doing this for war movies. I’m a navy veteran and I think your talent with words would be really helpful for a lot of people.
The problem I have is when I open up to anyone around me I get hurt by it because everyone around me doesn't understand me.
Dude's powers literally correlates with his mental state. Guy bottles up everything until he can't anymore then explodes and destroys everything around him and then he bottles it up again and the cycle repeats.
quite the allegory
Yes and no as it’s more of it building and happening at small scale the whole time as for powers he has super strength too
@@Channel-23s great comment bro!
🤯
That's what leads to believe that the manifestation of Comp V is tied to personality even trauma ( in Butcher and Hughie's case it's a bastardization of Homelander and A-Train respectively ).
I think a lot of people are missing something between that interaction between Soldier Boy and Homelander. When Homelander tells Soldier Boy that" I am you", Soldier Boy then replies "I know you're an f***ing disappointment", he's not just telling Homelander that, he's also acknowledging his own failings as a person, perhaps even a "hero". This is something that's worth looking into, maybe even doing the deep dive on.
He's also quoting His own father!
Yeah, he definitely has a self hatred be it his from his own or his father's judgment
That explains why instead of anger when he says it, it’s sadness or shame.
Literally everyone on the face of the earth knows this you're acting like it's some subtle thing people missed when it's the most quoted line
@@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259 yeah, but you never know. People in general can either be very perceptive, or very dense.
Soldier Boy can be hilarious at times, but he is so broken. When he calls Homelander a disappointment, it's like he's looking at his own reflection.
I do really enjoy his character and how he portrays it.
I feel like maybe if he was a stronger person, he’d have had a heart to heart talk with his son and tell him to avoid the mistakes he made. I think that what this show is trying to say is that people like “Captain America” are rare and most people (especially those not in tune with their emotions) would end up like homelander and his father if given the power.
Because homelander is.
Looking for love in all the wrong places.
The need for a father's approval.
Loneliness, fear, despair, anger, hate.
Sex, narcotics, alcohol, violent bullying as coping mechanisms..........
All these negative traits will drive a person to do horrible things and creates monsters. This is the core of this show.
It's basically psychoanalysis done as an interesting story.
very true
i gotta love the absolute determination of what's 'wrong' & the major synonymous subsets of it...
I absolutely love this breakdown of Soldier Boy. He was a great addition to Season 3. His actor was amazing. The twist with Homelander was brilliant and I really hope Soldier Boy returns next season. Something I would also point out in Soldier Boy's character is that his father called him a disappointment and when Soldier Boy confronts Homelander he copies what his father said to him by calling Homelander a disappointment. But ironically Homelander breaks that cycle with his own son Ryan. Homelander doesn't think Ryan is a disappointment he shows affection towards him something neither Soldier Boy or Homelander had as children themselves
SB calling homelander a disappointment after homelander tells him “i’m you” is the first thing i noticed when watching this episode the first time. but i never thought about how homelander is the one breaking the curse! it feels so weird to have sympathy for homelander but wow, he really is striving to create the family he never had and always wanted
@@theriveroftruth agree, tbh its hard for people to understand this cause Homelander has doing awful things and threats everyone arround him like sh*t, But Vogue its the real villain, they created this monster, they Let him do all their dirty work and cover His fckups, they are far More cold hearted and dangerous cause even if Homelander and all the 7 dissapears, Vogue would still exist, changing names, changing people, rebranding etc but the core would be the same, doing whenever It takes to make a profit
@@theriveroftruth soldier boy is my new favorite character and villain
Homelander has spent no time being a parent, and wants a family at this moment in the show. Ryan will have to continue to be meek to keep Homelanders interest over time.
You probably missed it, but in that case Soldier boy realizes he and Homelander are the same - both pathetic, and that his father was right about him and in dealing with him the way he did, and so tells Homelander off the way his father did.
Soldier Boy's issues stem from his relationship with his father. Growing up all he wanted was his father's approval but he could never get it. So he signed up for compound V and became the world's greatest superhero and became a war hero thinking finally he will have his father's approval. Instead he father said he wasn't a man because he took a short cut and cheated. His father would then proceed to call him a disappointment.
I always wondered how in real life, Captain America would be viewed. Now we know.
@MrPolicekarim Yeah, he took a shortcut to get where he is but he doesn't have solider boy's toxic side. Both are, I would say masculine characters but one is more toxic. (btw, when I mean toxic, I mean in personality, not being masculine.)
HL: "Weak? I'm you."
SB: "I know. You're a ****ing disappointment."
Such a good scene. Solider Boy is actively critiquing not only Homelander but himself as well in that particular scene. He developed as a character quite well over the course of S3 I just wish he had more screen time.
Well, he was a disappointment to his father, just like homelander is to him
Your*... Son!... (Not you)
Yeah, he did develop as a character. That’s why The Boys shouldn’t have all betrayed him and sided with Homelander!
Basically you can be super masculine but don’t lose your emotions compassion and empathy
Exactly, the point of the video in a nutshell
Do you know the game League of Legends? Braum is that
The definition of being a real man 💯
MM is actually a fair argument for that.
Bingo
Fun Fact: One of the reasons Jensen Ackles was cast as Soldier Boy was because he was the runner up to play Captain America in the MCU. And - obviously - Soldier Boy is a dark pastiche of Captain America.
he would have been a great captain America but he's an even better soldier boy. He plays the character so well
Jensen debunked this rumour in his last EW interview. Nevertheless, he'd have made an awesome Captain America
Where did you get this info from?.. Jensen already stated that he got the job due to his relation with the director being that Supernatural came from the same creator.
@@GCT1990 not the director but the show runner (Eric Kripke)
No he didn't you can't just say random things as facts. The actor himself stated it was his friendship to Erik krepke. Also stated some of the scenes were written solely so Erik could mess with him
Soldier Boy is, in my opinion, exactly what a real life Wolverine would be like. Perhaps less obnoxious but just as indifferent to the world & traumatized. We're talking about dealing with 3 times the amount of loss & pain the average human being has to endure, the brain washing, amnesia & physical trauma & that heavily invasive body wide surgery of molten metal being fused to his entire skeleton. No wonder in Logan this man wanted to die, which actually was his motivation in the last two films (Logan & The Wolverine) but at least he overcomes it in the Wolverine to be a hero. It just seems like a grueling, unfair existence. even his powers invoke a painful nature as his claws cut through his hands every time they're deployed. If any veteran has a right to snort & drink whatever drugs he wants, it would be Wolvie 😂
Out of curiosity, do you read Wolverine Comics? Been meaning to read more besides the 80’s story and OML and his origin
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 not as much as I'd like to. My introduction to Wolverine was through Hugh Jackman. Before that I knew of him, was even a fan of the X-Men tv series & some comics as kid but it wasn't til his cinematic portrayal I found him compelling & actually cool. Before that I seen him as another boring rank as Cyclops lol
Actually you're spot on. In his earlier appearance's in the X-Men most of the team loathed him. Lol
@@GangstaStan010 Logan in Ultimate X-Men is a total tool. He constantly hits on Jean and students alike, and takes no issue killing another member of the team, while simultaneously acting holier-than-thou with anything related to him.
I’ve always thought that Soldier Boy is a mix between Captain America, Homelander and Wolverine.
But really just Wolverine and Homelander in terms of personality.
Also, both him and Wolvie are giga chads🔥
I usually don't like the word "Toxic Masculinity" because it is sometimes used as a weapon to shut down an argument without having a genuine conversation. I also don't like how people frame all masculine traits as toxic. However, SB is the true case of Toxic Masculinity where it not only harms the people around him but himself as well. I've dealt with such father for my entire life while I was more of a emotional type of person. I was taught not to cry and got physically punished when I showed any hint of weakness ... kind of like Butcher. The constant struggle to "not be a pu**y" kept me stressed and anxious until I realized that I can't change myself nor even need to. My father seemed to suffer from it since everyone around him feared him and never showed their emotional towards him making him lonely. He became much loose as he aged and became more emotional. I find him to be a better father and a better man these days than ever before.
Totally agree. I think soldier boy is a hyper -extreme version of toxic masculinity. The problem I have with the term is it's used as a blanket descriptor for anything someone doesn't like about a man. Sometimes people are just jerks, has nothing to do with some perceived level of masculinity, toxic or otherwise.
@@ILoveGrilledCheese That’s my view as well. A lot of projection and deflection
yes I agree that's why I said toxic toughness as it is pushed on us all to just keep working or fighting and not think. I think it is a real thing we all have to deal with. what society says is strong and weak. Tank you for sharing. I think Butcher is a good example of how he feels deeply and is tough is a different way.
'Toxic masculinity' is post modernist language and should not be used by any serious person. The term has an agenda which is made clear by the fact that 'toxic femininity' is not a term that is used. That ideology is doing a great job of degrading our language.
@@technopirate304 Why do people take advantage of vulnerability and emotion? I think that’s a huge reason people mask their emotions
One of my favourite moments of the entire season is Soldier Boy's lip quiver when younger Grace Mallory tells him that his macho act never really works with women. That every woman is either humoring him or afraid of him. He shoots back with something smug about her getting a man, but that lip quiver lets the audience know that he knows she's right.
Ah yes because people are not individuals and everyone would not like a certain attitude 😩
@@richfoster4369 Well it's funny to think that his attitude most of the time attracts men not women
@@Bufubarion probably but there would be and I have met certain women who are attracted to that type of attitude. Definitely a minority tho
I actually felt bad for him. Because he looked on the verge of tears. Great acting.
I mean, there are probably women that did sleep with him totally because they wanted too, for clout or money or because they genuinely found him attractive, not all though, which he's likely aware of, which is why it bothers him
I'm glad you clarified during this video that it's not only a male issue and the issue isn't exactly masculinity it's toxicity itself that morphs people's perceptions of masculinity
Thank you for actually watching the video and helping raise awareness on the topic of gendered labels. Appreciate you being a part of my channel
At least he keeps his own words. That is the most likeable character from him.
First off, love the show version of Solider Boy, because he's the complete opposite of the comic, who was a absolute coward, plus, he has a actual character here.
Secondly, not gonna lie, my first immediate thought of your Soldier Boy cosplay was Nightwing lol
Yah it does have a knighting flare =P I tried hahah
I don't know the comics, but isn't the show's Soldier Boy a coward? He sure isn't a hero or didn't show any sign of courage.
@@petraw9792 SBs TV show... a coward? Like... how is he a coward? Im interested in this.
@@dr_cachetes6822 I can't remember him going into a fight which would put him in actual danger or facing any conflict. This is just the impression I got, he either evades or explodes, both not very brave strategies. But maybe I just forgot about a scene that would prove me wrong.
@@petraw9792 fighting Homelander was actually dangerous, and so was hunting down that psychic guy, so Soldier Boy is not a coward. Like the video maker said, having the be tough mentality makes for good soldiers, even if it does make them less of a healthy person.
Thanks so much for this analysis, Georgia. There's a difference between being strong and being toxic, and men should feel more able to express their emotions in a healthy way without fear of being emasculated by society.
Society will emasculate men regardless of if their "toxic" or not. Modern society wants everyone, regardless of gender, to be the same carbon copy generic human
Anecdotal as it may be, I've been put down by women just as much as I have by other men for showing emotion when I had rough times. I went through the worst year and a half of my life (father died, mother attempted suicide in front of me, was stalked for couple months then almost killed by an uncle with a meth/mental health problem, and my best friend died in an ATV accident all within a 10 month period) and barely anyone in my personal life, man or woman, wanted anything to do with because I, and I quote, was "a fucking crybaby".
It's an issue for sure but some act like it's an issue only men need to work on. It's an issue we all need to work on together so things can improve.
yes strong is such a different thing. It takes courage to feel and do what you need to.
Society meaning other man here uh
One of the big issues that isn't discussed when talking about men opening up about their emotions is that when men do, they are often taken advantage of by others. This is why a lot of men put up these barriers, because there have been times when they trust someone and let them in, only for that trust to be betrayed.
Soldier Boy was my new favorite character and villain from The Boys. I go back and forth on him, when watching the show, I pitied him and was disappointed how he was disposed of in the season finale.I can understand him when it comes to be betrayed and plus Jensen Ackles acting. However while Homelander is worse, Soldier Boy isn't a saint and some of the worst I have seen of people IRL up close I see in Soldier Boy which makes it unnecessarily complicated
yes he has some great aspects and terrible its a very interesting character to explain
@@GeorgiaDow video recommendation: Why do people take advantage of vulnerability and emotion? I think that’s a huge reason people mask their emotions
I wouldn't exactly consider him to be a villain with how grey this show is.
@@ThePartisan13 could he be an anti villain?
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 Yeah absolutely that makes sense.
Nothing wrong with feeling things. But there is something wrong with showing strong feelings in the wrong time and place
He doesn't show his feelings ever and seems to swallow them down literally with alcohol
There’s a time and place to be an emotionless soldier. Having it turned on all the time will cause harm to those who you love.
Reminds me of veterans who suffer from ptsd :(
Is there, though?
When all soldiers lay their weapons down
Or when all kings and all queens relinquish their crowns
Or when the only true messiah rescues us from ourselves
It's easy to imagine
There will be sorrow
Yeah, there will be sorrow
And there will be sorrow no more - sorrow, bad religion
Ya that’s true you can’t especially in the military where others rely on each and team work is important. Also some times you need to act tuff or put up a brave face for others.
@@hab0272 reminds me of those who suffered because of veterans :(
I think its one of the biggest "conspiracies" of culture where other people would control the definition of manhood. A narrow definition of manhood that excludes feelings thus excludes listening to your inner voice. This makes one more "useful" to others (like fighting someone else's war.)
very well said
or humanities natural predators and other things
its probubly only resent historically that we don't have to "fear" animals attacks, yes they still happen but rarely,
this world will give you lots of reasons to shutdown you emotions because sometimes they get in the way, so you shut them down, but its harder to get them back
@@kaigraham1287 Society is just ran by Apes.
@@bishop51807 yes, we are essentiality running Legacy software in a world that the things that got us here are now the problem
Also notice how when Hughie confronts him on his own perceived weakness; that being that he isn’t “man” enough and lied about being in World War 2, he punches Hughie in the face.
I like how you call it toxic toughness it’s more accurate and feels less of an attack on my character lol
Thanks =)
I think an additional point is an unwillingness to change. While Soldier Boy overall is abusive and abrasive, a lot of his thinking comes from his time. He’s used to the old America and he doesn’t accept the new America because it’s simply too different for him to grasp it. Despite him looking in his middle age, he’s over a century old, born in 1919. While it’s considered toxic masculinity now, it was considered the norm for him.
The unwillingness to change part really drives it home. He blows up downtown by accident and says he feels bad for it then does it again and again and again. He got betrayed by his Team because of how he treated them then does it again with the next group. He realizes his father's wrongdoing and is wholeheartedly resentful of his past then projects the exact same sentiment on his own child. Considering all that and going back to his monologue in the forest it really stands out to me " What do i do when im sad or scared or whatever? Fcking Nothing" He admits it completely unintentionally and sadly hughie doesn't pick up on it . Its so interesting on so many levels to me
@@herrsiemes7094 well he didn’t have that power until he was captured. And he had PTSD so hearing that Russian song made him activate it, he has the excuse for that one. The rest not really but they were casualties because he was hunting his team down even though they only did it because they were tired of his abuse
@@herrsiemes7094 he didnt have any control over his new power, and why wouldnt he be disappointed in homelander?
Yea this guy is actually toxic masculinity. He should be the definition. I hate it when people use the phrase for any little thing a guy does, but this.... THIS character is actually toxic
He's based
what little thing has it been thrown at that you dont agree?
@@KT-pu3gn Opening a door
@@jeyrm nobody has ever gotten mad at you for opening a door and if someone does get mad at you for that don't give them any attention, go on about your day, Opening a door for someone isn't toxic
@@KT-pu3gn Ohhh you would be surprise of how many people turn rage mode if you open or hold the door for a woman
I study sociology for a while, I hated it, but something that stock with me was "Being a man is not a gender, it's a title"
It's something that one must earn, recognition by completing social challenges, from not showing emotions to acting wrecles, etc.
And yes, it's as wrong and as enfuriating as it sounds
Thats why calling a woman , a girl is no big deal but if you call a grown man , a boy you basically disrespect him
@@Katalin04 And why almost every insult directed at men are specifically about their gender identity
What is acting wreckes?
And If you think masculinity is wanted by not showing emotions then that’s unfortunate. The most badass men have their vulnerable moments and cry. There’s a difference between a man being vulnerable sometimes and being a total wimp.
I haven’t cried in nearly 4 years. I remember when I would cry over my mothers death I was told to man up a lot. I didn’t even cry when I lost the sight in my eye. I was sent to therapy and was diagnosed with some kind of anger issues, ptsd and depression. I used to bite my tongue hard when I felt sad because it would take away the need to cry
She tried to dress like Soldier Boy but ended up looking like Nightwing
Rofl !!! hahaha I did try
You are such a breath of fresh air. your "rant" about what angers you??? gave me life. thank you. I will be rewatching this. you are a bright spot Miss Georgia. thank you.
That gave me joy and brightened my heart thank you =))
@@GeorgiaDow oh goodness. wow. Thank you for being so wonderfully genuine :) it definitely translates so well.
Black Panther Movie
-T’Challa: Heroic Masculinity
-Eric Killmonger: Toxic Machismo
Just imagine if Soldier Boy had taken interest in the internet and what people are thinking of him. Nuclear explosions everywhere.
I can actually relate to this breakdown. Some men that I've known were exactly like him.
While I was getting through adolescence I developed some of this behaviors too. But once I grew up an adult and I realized what were the root causes I was able to reconcile with my emotions and manage them to get a more satisfying and balanced way of life.
First steps first: It always starts by recognizing we got something to heal and having the will to get through that way.
I love how you didn't try to make it political and actually stripped the gender off of the concept for most of the video. You really seem to be looking at the problem from an angle of understanding people and helping them.
As a man who has struggled with some aspects of "Toxic Toughness", I find that most people who discuss this issue don't really care about it and push either one of 2 ideas "masculinity/men = bad" or "toxic toughness is good and the only way to get ahead in life".
Thank you! You seem like a geniunely caring person.
this means so much to me as this is what I hoped to accomplish. I hope that you find your balance and be the best you for you. Thank you for taking the time to comment and share it meant a lot to me.
One thing that soilder boy knows is that him feeling will slow him down but cos he never takes a second to stop he never takes a second to feel so no he's running in an endless circle of "keep going, you can feel later when the job is done." But in he's mind his job is never done so he'll always be this way
Jobs sometimes are never ending imo XD
You are the first therapist I have ever seen that said it is okay if you are not a ball of emotion all the time. If every therapist just says you are toxic and broken if you do not break down and cry all the time, it makes it rather hard to seek help if you need it. As you said, as long as you are not cutting out a piece of yourself or denying what you truly feel, being stoic is not a negative thing. Oh, and I much prefer the term Toxic Toughness. That term really describes the issue far better as well as removing the sexist stigma, allowing woman to accept and seek help if they notice this issue within themselves.
Thanks I am happy you enjoyed the video and watched it all the way through. I hope it helps others be more of themselves and live happier lives. Thanks for being a part of of my community
I really like calling it Toxic Toughness, as that's what it really is.
I really enjoy the representation of generational trauma and issues being passed down in the boys, MM, Butcher, Soldier Boy, Homelander and Ryan all have ties to it and its sad but very engaging
What about generational issues passed down by women?
@@charzanboo9940 You misread the comment
@@charzanboo9940this comment is abt the men of the show
@@sakareeh So you are saying generational trauma cannot be inflicted on boys by women? Why are you sexist?
@@charzanboo9940 They were referring to characters who are suffering generational trauma. The only female character in The Boys going through generational trauma that I can think of is Staright, as most of the other female characters struggle with something else.
I absolutely love Soldier Boy, and it is 100% because of Jensen Ackles lol
“He doesn’t have the coping mechanisms in order to deal with it AND HE DOESN’T WANT TO” 💔❤️🔥
Soldier Boy is based
This is the first time i\ve taken the topic of toxic masculinity seriously.
The ironic thing about soldier boy that he wants to have family too, it's visible that he actually wants to accept Homelander, but he can't, because of this limiting concept of being a manly man.
This is just how a real man should be.Nothing toxic being a real MAN
If you have to constantly add real man in a sentence to make yourself sound more secure then there's nothing real about it.
I'll be honest, I hate the term "toxic masculinity", too often it's an attack on masculinity and men (which society seems to be attacking), always too one sided by those with woke thoughts, regardless of it's definition. Toxic toughness is a much better term imo, it's not so 'woke' (which is toxic itself). I will say though life centuries ago was tougher, so I guess the whole "toughness" thing was a way of survival (if the attitude was even a thing then).
Thanks for that so true
I do agree that the term can come across as being anti-men, but however I still think it's a good descriptor beyond its surface level misinterpretation. This pattern of behavior is something society expects of men specifically, and is intertwined with men's role in society and all issues related to gender roles. So I think at the end of the day toxic masculinity is still a fitting term.
Now I might just be an "um ackchuyally" guy but honestly last I checked that was just unironic machismo. Soldier boy is just struggling to hold up his ideal of what is macho. Of what he is supposed to represent.
It’s definitely a real thing as is toxic femininity (Amber Heard’s a great example), but the term is thrown around so carelessly anymore that people are either having trouble taking it seriously because anything that’s “too masculine” for any particular person can labeled as toxic or they aren’t taking it serious enough to the extent of ignoring the issue when it’s right in front of them. This is one of the issues with trending terms is that it’s much easier to succumb to herd mentality and collectively label entire groups of people as the same than to put in the work necessary to judge people based on individual merits. Groups certainly have their place but in today’s modern social climate it can be frighteningly easy for someone to lose their own thoughts to the others around them.
@@GeorgiaDow That is a much appreciated consession.
7:49 Soldier Boy said that because he sees himself in Homelander. Remember his father was verbally abusive towards Soldier Boy.
Could you do a video about Guts from Berserk? He is such a great and complex character. I think that with your background you would be able to dissect his traumas better than most people.
Holy hell yes!
She would probably have to go by the golden age arch anime.
@@Skechy3603 I'd wrather her analise the Manga. But the anime would be good as well. It's pretty easy to find on youtube.
Gold!
@@brando31799 the movies are better
I hope we get to see a redemption arc for Soldier boy in Season 5 where he finally confronts his feelings of inadequacy and actually becomes the hero for once, and prove his worth.
Then maybe raise Ryan since Butcher will definitely die along with Homelander
I think people confuse not feeling emotions and not letting your emotions rule over your actions.
I actually went through the inverse problem. Throughout school I was told how I should be feeling and in touch with my emotions, but as I grew older, I was better able to keep them in check. I thought something was wrong with me. But this control is a byproduct of maturity, age, and also somewhat being a man.
I have an easier time keeping a cool head than some other man and most women when shit hits the fan. Doesn’t mean I don’t feel the emotions. It just means I prefer to be a steady rock for everyone to hold on to instead of adding to the chaos.
Notice how she doesn't respond to this comment.
It is a good rant. As I had to explain to a friend that toxic masculinity does not say masculinity is toxic. It is the same as toxic waste or toxic chemicals.
Good point on the fact that it hurts them as well as the people around them.
Well, it does though.
Billy Butcher ruined everything with that emotional behavior. Soldier Boy was right.
Yes , toxic soldier boy was right in the end
Soldier boy was composed in all intense situations he got the job done that's what men do, we get the job done irrespective of how we feel.
@@drakecliff8378based af
I like the term toxic toughness more than toxic masculinity. It’s a much less charged term.
It's always a joy watching your video
And it's really good to watch them multiple times
Soldier boy was one of the best on the show hands down
The one thing that struck me in the exchange between Homelander and Soldier Boy was the “but I’m you.” “I know. A disappointment.”
Maybe I’m giving a benefit of the doubt because I like Jensen Ackles, but to me it seemed like in that moment there was a degree of self awareness by Soldier Boy, that he was disappointed in himself and that his son became like him. It doesn’t change that he is a reprehensible person, but it seemed like a moment of clarity, even if he took the low road from it rather than the high one
projection and yes I think you are right
Isn't that most father's fear though? That their son's will turn out just like them instead of better? :/
@@michaelriddick7116 if they’re not happy with who they themselves are, I think so. I genuinely had the impression that Soldier Boy might have made a decent dad because he seemed determined not to repeat the mistakes of his father, and thought that was why he reacted so negatively with Homelander once he believed it was already too late (otherwise why bother reaching out in the first place?). Of course, his negativity led him to conclude it was too late, and so still handled it wrong. Though again, I fully admit that liking the actor (Supernatural fan) might be causing me to give the character benefits of the doubt he doesn’t deserve
8:30, I think you missed the wider context a little, Soldier Boy was repeating the same line his father said to him when he found out he was a super hero instead of a real soldier.
Strange as it sounds, dealing with constant high stress situations is far easier than confronting the PTSD that it comes with.
When you deal with convicts trying to shank you or fellow officers is par for the course, when you're on alert 100% for hours at a time it's hard to wind down from the mentality.
Helps me understand in the end why he rejects his son because he sees his attention seeking as weakness, like he is projecting how his own dad talked down to him of not being good enough.
Very well said
Toxic does not have a gender.
He's not toxic, he's radioactive!
It's paradoxical that Homelander (who did some of the worst things, even worse than the ones Soldier Boy did) knows what he wants in terms of his feelings, while Soldier Boy doesn't, he just represses that part with alcohol and drugs.
I absolutely love how much you advocate for the toxic male. Not in the sense that you encourage their toxicity but in the sense that you made so much of this video about how they are victims too.
In a way that honestly I think would permeate. Society creates them and they are not better off for that.
Toxic masculinity isn’t real
Great breakdown! One little thing to note -- and apologies if it's already been mentioned -- "Bennies" does not refer to benzodiazepines. That class of drug definitely does not wire you to the gills, and the first one, Librium, wasn't even discovered until 1958. "Bennies" is a colloquialism for Benzedrine, a strong amphetamine widely used and abused through the early and mid 20th century. It pops up all the time in old Burroughs and Ginsberg works. It's not made anymore, but it was essentially pharmaceutical meth.
I don't think bourbon and meth with his burger speaks any more highly of his mental stability, mind you 😅
Thanks for posting. I did not realize he was referring to Benzedrine. I'm now curious if it was common at any time in history to crush the pills like he does. When I saw the scene, I just assumed it was because he wanted the altered effect but now I'm wondering if that could have also been one of the prescribed ways to consume the medication in the 1920s, 1940s, etc.
The self-awareness of Soldier Boy when he calls Homelander a disappointment was really jarring. He’s messed up, and he knows it, but still behaves the way he does. I don’t know if that makes him scarier or not, but it’s really cool how they wrote his character.
I think you doing analyses on characters in The Batman Animated Series would be awesome. So many psychologically deep characters that carry all too human issues. It was doing all this before The Boys, and it was considered a kid show to boot.
@The Autistic Raven I think Spectacular Spider-Man and Daredevil both deserves an analysis on its characters top to bottom
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 I am sure they do, and she can arrange moments for such based on her schedule. I was simply giving a recommendation because characters in The Batman Animated Series, such as Two Face and Mr. Freeze, show how you properly write villains in an animated series. You give them reasoning as to how they turned out that way to begin with.
@@Seasonal-Shadow_4674 no. Daredevil is just "KiLLiNg iS BaD"
I just came to see a take on Soldier Boy... i didnt expect to get faced with my own failure! Good god this hit deep. I saved it. I need to work on myself. Thank you Georgia!!!!!
Analyzing Soldier Boy from a logical point of view.
I see what you did there ;D
Being autistic it was more or less impossable for me to emathize with Soldier Boy, but your video did explain why. So thank you for that. There is one thing I found interesting, however, He was able to back up a lot of his claims of being tough by actually taking on multiple supes. This is something even Homelander couldn't do. This isn't do discredit your analysis, but I think does add a layer of complxity to it becoming a, "But at what cost," scenario. And this would be in the best of cases where someone is able to back up their, so called, toughness. in most cases it just destroys the person in question.
Yes I think that adds to his character and the danger involved. Though for educational purposes and teaching people what they are dealing with in maladaptive behaviours it isn't as applicable to real world scenarios. Though yes your point is taken, thanks for the comment
Homelander fought three of them. He was even overpowering Soldier Boy and Butcher.
Appreciate the content! Keep it up.
Oh man that one cuts deep.I saw parts of my childhood in this arc and boy I’m happy to have learned a bit about introspection and emotional intelligence along the way.
In my experience and from soldier boys description of his childhood in a hostile/ unstable upbringing it is all to easy to succumb to those negative emotions that brew in that type of environment under that sort of pressure and you end up making it everyone else’s problem without even realizing it.
I don't really see why some people are so attracted to toxic masculinity; the kind of masculinity where they expect you to bottle up your emotions instead of expressing them. What's "weak" about having emotions like a human being? What is so strong with being an emotionless robot? When I was a kid, my role models were guys like Batman (Michael Keaton version), Son Goku, Luke Skywalker, Spider Man, Domon Kasshu, James Raynor, men who were not afraid to be emotional, but still used their powers for good.
James Raynor expressed his raw anger at his ex-girlfriend Sarah Kerrigan when Sarah murdered Raynor's Protoss buddy Praetor Fenix. The same thing went for Son Goku when his foes such as Freeza and King Piccolo killed his friends; his anger manifested into raw power that allowed him to win his battles. Domon Kasshu wasn't afraid to be emotional in battles, nor was he afraid to confess his love to his girlfriend Rain Mikamura in their final battle against the Devil Gundam. Luke Skywalker openly showed his love and mercy for Darth Vader in Return of the Jedi, even as Vader was trying to kill him. Heck, I'm also a big fan of Darth Vader, and Vader's all about giving in to his emotions and letting out that raw power that comes from it instead of bottling it in like some Jedi. We even saw from his life as a Jedi on how bottling up his emotions as his masters taught him to had a negative effect on poor Anakin Skywalker.
The Michael Keaton Batman had a wide range of emotions, and we see how he deals with them and how he evolves into a more complete person as he fights back against the man who killed his parents while saving the innocent from the same fate. Spider Man in the films and in the 90s cartoon also expressed a wide range of emotions, from guilt, to loss, to hope, and that helped us sympathize with him as he fought his way through both work AND supervillains.
Holding in all that emotion will just end with men having PTSD or some other unfortunate fate. Either they'll end up exploding sometime when they're not supposed to, or they'll end up destroying themselves with emotional damage as they hold in their emotions instead of expressing them. They wind up having to turn to booze, whores, drugs, smoking, or some other harmful vice to drown their sorrows and ease their pain, which will end up exacerbating their condition or accelerating their demise.
You'd think that with all these cases of men self-destructing due to them holding in their emotions, that people would stop encouraging them to hold it in and see emotion as weakness. Emotion is as much a part of the human experience as eating or breathing. And seeing a part of the human experience as weakness is, quite frankly, disturbing, as if we expect men to be perfect gods who can't feel pain, sorrow, or loss. If that isn't misandry, then I don't know what is.
unpopular opinion,I have embraced this mechanism ( detaching from emotions while around people ), a few months now
I'm doing well, no drama or non needed bs!
yet I still hear my self and my inner voice when I'm alone I can consider it all
but out to the public and ppl , it is working fine.
will give updates in future
but for now it's working fine
and I know it seems unhealthy but it's really working !
This doesn't seem maladaptive, to know your emotions but to have control over them can be useful and helpful. To not know how you feel and to push others away out of fear is unhealthy. It is fine to be at a distance when it is suitable for you as long as you could let people in if you saw them as worth it. I hope it keeps working = )
@@GeorgiaDowmany thanks doctor !
Impressive. Very nice. Where is the video on toxic femininity?
Not just one generation but multiple generations.
Good analysis Georgia. This brings me to why it matters so much to young men / boys to have a good father figure. My father taught me. Father's discipline while seems harsh is great way for boys to learn. I.e. take Odin and Thor...my dad was same way. He always held me accountable for my actions but let me realize and see the wisdom of his fatherly lessons. I had to come to it not with aid, but because I learned. Because real life you don't get second chances usually. As a man you learn self-reliance, but also the value of true male friendship. To ask for help when you need it, but also to strive to accomplish things on your own. You have to be grown man and deal with your poor choices. Being a man is not about being macho or even fighting, but about being responsible man, doing the right thing, being courageous in dealing with issues, facing your fears, being true to yourself and standing up for what you believe in. Treating others with respect. Seeing a person's character before anything else. Help those who are being bullied or being picked on. These are good qualities of masculinity. I think the same applies for women too as there are toxic things women do that impact their daughters.
Thank you very much for this. Very well said
I love how they handled his character in the show
He acted it perfectly
At first when i got the notification for this video i saw "toxic masculinity" I was like oh man here we go a talk about how guys should be more feminine. But once again Doc you exceeded my expectations with a good reaction.
thanks so much =) I tried
Its because they were vulnerable once and that was used against them so usually they make their decisions "no more". Solution is to make them realize that you are different from the people who hurt them.
Being vulnerable can be risky and so you can go about that in a healthy way not in a very unhealthy and self destructive like soldier boy.
Me a toxic white male
“You made those words up”
I actually relate to this very much. That’s probably why he’s one of my favorite characters in the show and I hope he’s in season 4. This show is so good
I know you’re a therapist and will say why
As a teen and now I used to have a hard time expressing sadness because i believe it a sign of weakness to show sadness and half my family member keep bringing back on thinking “put your pride aside and show some feeling “ I just don’t the only feeling I’ll express are anger and happy.
Sadness and doubt on the other hand I don’t
Still love soldier boy I just wish I had his ability to not care what people think
It is always very disheartening when I hear that someone has had to cut out an emotion out of themselves. Usually thats because someone in their parental hierarchy taught them it wouldn't be accepted or that it caused the family damage. So they cut this part out of themselves to survive but it then becomes maladaptive. I hope you do someday find access to your sadness. it is yours and precious. thank you for sharing and helping others who may be feeling the same
Thank you for helping me understand why I behave the way I do. I do not trust therapists but you are an exception. Thank you.
I am honoured that you trust me thank you and I wish you the best
Some of the points you made in this video hit hard. Amazing analysis, as usual, probably the best take on toxic masculinity I've ever seen. Love your videos.
Wow, thank you! Made my day thank you for this
I was in the army for yers and nobody tough us to drop on feelings. On the contrary, we were encourage to share and know each other's weaknesses
I completely agree with you about the toxic masculinity. That's why Frenchie and MM are thr best, they're the exact opposite. Can you react to one of them next?
He’s the best character from season 3. What a guy. Hope they bring him back for season 4.
These videos are truely entertaining and informative, I love them.
Glad you like them! thanks !
We gonna ignore the fact that in the lore bill Cosby slipped soldier boy a roofie
No such thing as “toxic masculinity”
Real masculinity is beautiful and self sacrificing, bridled strength, fighting for loved ones, care/devotion and making real hard decisions and taking hits and demoralization and keep moving forward
This character represents the lack of real masculinity in a masculine body. Unbridled Strength
Solider boy is a real man. probably you are a women who doesn't understand men.
It’s a misnomer
Well said. You can be emotional and strong no need to have to choose. Get all life has to offer and allow yourself to enjoy it
Hey… if you watched the video, you’d see that even the therapist says it doesn’t have anything to do with masculinity
@@GeorgiaDow thank you. Didn’t realize you replied. Didn’t want to start an argument in your comments section….
"when we talk about toxic masculinity we talk about its effect on everyone around"
no. that's by design. toxic masculinity is not a real thing and what people refer to is the reason you didn't get incinerated by genetic superfreaks combined with shit that doesn't happen.
then when the idea of "toxic femininity" comes up its portrayed as something cute and harmless and selfless. its a backhanded criticism. its framed as a criticism but isnt really.
"you're denying yourself the ability to feel"
maybe he doesn't WANT to feel or talk about feelings or wear pretty pretty dresses and mommy's lipstick. maybe he DOES feel but doesn't announce how he feels all the time. you can't just have your characters announce how they feel. that makes me feel angry.
"that society and media has done" yeah its because he saw it on tv. maybe you haven't considered that men aren't defective women?
She is not asking men to be women. She is saying that, man or woman, it is important to be in tune with and aware of one's emotions, and to properly process them.
Avoidance of emotion prevents processing, and can keep oneself from growing holistically.
I appreciate you making this video. It gave me a bit of insight on why I truly felt for Soldier Boy as a character even though to the naked eye he seems like such a cruel and selfish individual. The environment I grew up normalized toxic masculinity. To not show emotions, to not ask for help, to avoid allowing anyone to know you completely because of that feeling of weakness and vulnerability. It took me years, about 27 years old and I am now 32 years old, for me to actually allow myself to not see things so black and white, and understand that the the things I saw as "weak" were part of being human. And in all honesty, it took a kind hearted woman I was dating to help me see that. If she didn't hate or betray him, I think Crimson Countess would have done the same for Soldier Boy.
Crimson countess probably wouldn't have because like most Supes her morality is warped by her own power.
@Gus Mackenzie True, but that's up for speculation. I mean, look at what she turned out to be even after Soldier Boy's capture. Not much of a threat to people or anything close to the more modernized Supes we see. I don't think she's inherently evil, or evil at all.
Just want to point out that Soldier Boy is not doing benzos, he's doing benzedrine. Totally different. He's using speed essentially, that's why he says "we were jacked to the gills"
Maybe it's overanalyzing, but I think it's interesting that in the scene between Dean Winch... I mean Soldier Boy ( ;) ) and Homelander, when Homelander says "what do you mean weak? I'm you" and Soldier Boy doesn't say "no, you're not" or "you're weaker" or anything like that. He says "I know" and then adds Homelander is a disappointment. But that "I know" feels like deep down Soldier Boy knows there's something wrong with him, maybe he sees everything that was wrong with him, within Homelander. "I'm you" "I know, you're a disappointment". It has vibes of Spider-Man-Tony Stark "I wanted to be like you" "And I wanted you to be better".
But I don't know, maybe I'm reading too much. But the choice of words in that scene was interesting.
Great catch
Loved this Vid and agree on a lot of the things you pointed out. I loved the Soldier Boy character. Because he was both entertaining and represented sum of the things I avoided becoming like. Validating and understanding your emotions is very important! Although, I have to admit there was certain aspects of his character I found worthy of respecting. Like him being willing to keep his side of the deal to help kill Homelander.
The guy is so toxic that he literally has nuclear radiation in his body from it
Imagine the existential dread in seeing that, even without your presence in their life, your son apparently inherited all of the bad things your father pointed out in you and feeling like you’re just bad product…?
It’s happening to Ryan. It happened to Homelander. It happened to Soldier Boy. Heck, I’m not even surprised if Soldier Boy’s father was experienced the same. It’s just a terrible cycle that ironically none of them are strong enough to break.
One facet of this video I found interesting was the notion of cutting out emotions leading to you not recognizing your needs. Possibly and over share but throughout my childhood I was given both overt and subtle messages my feelings or wants were a problem or not a priority. While I did have a period of immense apathy I recognize why I'm like this, and what my needs and wants are. However even the councilor I briefly saw said that while I cognitively have a great grasp of what's wrong and why I think the way I do. Even he was baffled how to get my emotional awareness or even emotions at all to the same level. Don't know if that is common, sign of a larger issue, etc. Just thought I'd share.
The cause being overt and subtle messages is very common. It is how we unconsciously learn what is expected of us and how to behave. This is why many people are missing out on their emotions and what their needs on. There are techniques which can help you get both on the same level but it does take a certain amount of work and effort but it is really worth it in the end. I am happy you are out of apathy it is a really horrible feeling
@@GeorgiaDow yeah, wish it had not come via the breakdown from realizing just how much I'd become like my own abuser. However I'm deeply grateful that I woke up earlier in my life, at the very least it prevented me from continuing such behaviors.
he is still my favorite character
Soldier Boy is The Boys Captain America
Water is wet !!
Correction: Soldier Boy is an Ultimate Captain America Variant
It's so interesting watching Jensen Ackles go from Dean Winchester to Soldier Boy. Both characters have so much trauma and were crafted into little soldiers in some ways, but the biggest difference is how they both came out of it and the paths they chose. Dean Winchester sometimes does fall into some toxic traits but he's not afraid to express some emotions. Usually he's very much "I'm fine. I don't know what you're talking about" because of how he was raised, but instead of mocking and teasing people who do show their emotions like Soldier Boy has done in this video, Dean listens and allows that person to tell him how they're feeling. I think what made Dean much softer than Soldier Boy is Dean had to raise his younger brother, Sam, and we see in flashbacks in Supernatural how protective Dean was of Sam's innocence in the beginning and how he still is protective of Sam.
I would actually love to see an analyst of the Supernatural characters if that's possible! 😊
The term 'Toxic Masculinity' has been so heavily associated w/ liberal crybaby-ism that I've completely given up on it. They're man children now, clowns, and I think the show makes 'very' clear that Soldierboy is just as much an actor for masculinity as Homelander is for virtue. He simply likes the aesthetic of being tough without doing anything he thinks gets him there, when in reality he is heavily traumatized by his own abusive father's neglect.
Preach 👏
Nicely said
This is one of the better takes on this channel.
Yes. Thank you
💯💯💯