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This video was awesome! Great content. 1) An integration I can think of is some sport where the different elements compete. Especially if society and geographies are separated by element, you would naturally get some tribal behavior, and sport could be a healthy way for a integrated society to express that. 2) My magic system starts hard and moves to soft. i) The input is a resource called denny. ii) The outputs at first are the 4 forms of matter--turning denny into solid, liquid, gas, or plasma for various reasons. As we get deeper into the magic, the outputs get more squishy, like fortifying your own body or flying. iii) Limitations are the resource availability, individual ability, and a loss of one's self to the cosmic all, iv) Opportunities center around the divide between those who can use magic and those who can't--and we learn it's all a lie, and anyone can use magic. v) Magic is completely integrated as the "haves" and "have nots" that is the theme of my first book in the series. In later books, we learn the roles magic plays in religion and historical power dynamics, health of the planet and more. Thanks!

I did finish my first novel called the devil's dairy part 1 and I showed it to some of my family members. My dad was the last one, but he wanted to go to the documents to see what was written, and one of them was the prologue. he did say i did a good job writing the story, but it needs more historical information like the range war and so on and so forth. he was giving me some tips on how the publishing company works and most of it is more so business stuff, because if you send out the manuscript, chances are neither one of the people will say that it doesn't have more info. Right now, I'm going back to finish up adding information so on and so forth.

It feels like you are shouting in my face. I have no idea what your studio looks like but can we get twelve more inches of space?

I’ve been trying my best to make my magic system make sense. Different races have access to different magic in my world. It’s been difficult for me to make it all make sense. I’m trying not to do too much or too little. It has been difficult to figure out where that balance truly lies.

This was an absolutely fantastic video, thanks man.

I'm not sure if this has been mentioned in the comments already, but Dabble is an excellent middle ground. It has a lot of the same tools Scrivener does, like being able to write scene-by-scene, keep character and story notes, etc. It's browser-based, so you get that nice autosave/cross-platform (handy in my case, because I work between Windows, iOS, and Linux). It also saves your work locally, so if you lose your net connection, you don't have to worry about losing work. And while they are primarily a subscription service, you can choose to buy a lifetime membership. It's pricey, but it's been worth it to me. Another option if you want a one-and-done download is yWriter. It's entirely free, has a lot of the same tools Scrivener does, and downloads and installs to your computer. I actually found it because I was looking for a Scrivener alternative (since at the time I looked, Scrivener was Mac only). But since yWriter is free, there is zero risk to giving it a look. :)

I like that my novel starts out in a specific house, and that house incorporates a lot of elements which are brought up more often, including emotional conflict. The house is present in the subsequent two parts as well. By being forced to leave the house, my first book's MC is invested instead in understanding her mother's complicated journey and also being put into that same space.

00:00 Intro 01:23 Hard vs Soft Magic Systems 03:54 Inputs 08:33 Outputs 10:10 Limitations 14:10 Opportunities 17:39 Integrations

My magic system is still a WIP, but I have the foundation. Magic is fuelled by emotion. For instance, your magic will be stronger when protecting something you care about. Being angry might cause your magic to lash out violently and uncontrollably, while being calm might give you more precise control. Now I just need to figure out what's stopping a really angry farmer from tearing down a castle. 🤔

Good stuff! Subscribed! 👍

My WIP is a Percy Jackson meets Hellblade. I have created my own Pantheon of Gods and Goddesses. Children that are born half god and half human/elf/dwarf are called Godlings. A godling inherits a piece of their godly parents' abilities. For example, a godling who is the child of the goddess of Nature may be able to talk to animals, whereas the other child might just be really good at keeping plants alive. Godlings are the only ones BORN with magic, and this magic could consume the child if they do not learn to control it. The only other people that can posses magic are the Elves and the Dwarves, and only through a crystal that the Earth, Fire, Water and Air gods have created together. So the powers that someone wielding this crystal could control would be related to the four elements. This crystal has to be on them in order for the magic to work. So they have found ways, like wearing the crystal as jewelry, or they crush it and put it in the metal when creating their sword or dagger. Still trying to flesh things out, but I'm happy with what I have so far lol

This is the second time i see someone adress magic inputs only yumesuke's library tackles this point where he mentioned that with books inputs are more revelant for drama creation where as in a medium like anime almost all imputs are the same but the output is superior.. although in anime magic systems are called power systems

Just came across your channel. I am Loving this breakdown of how to build a magic system and applying it into our stories. Exercise for the imagination muscle. Lol Thank you!

I love this! I especially love the idea of inputs and integrations. Those two aren't something that's usually discussed when it comes to creating magic systems, but it's the part that I both struggle with and enjoy figuring out the most. Great video!

The magic system I made is both hard and soft if you ask me, because there are endless possibilities to magic, but all of it has a defined limit and weaknesses. Input: every mage needs knowledge of general magic first before using elemental magics, the three foundations of magic being the command, control, and commencement, more commonly known as the 3C, in order to cast magic, without knowledge to the 3C would result in uncontrolled magic release which is proven to be quite dangerous especially to high levels of mana used. Output: higher usage of mana will result in more powerful magic, and using a higher rate of magic will also result in stronger attack, healing, empowerment and defense. Limitations: the ignorance of your limits when using magic is proven to be insanely dangerous, that being said, "if magic has no other energy left for it to consume, it will feast on your own life", the over usage of magic can easily kill anyone, even an immortal would be gone if it gets drained out of energy, energy is what makes us exist, with no energy, you'll turn into nothing, boundless or not, it is the prime concept of inhibition that inhibits the abuse of things, no matter how powerful they are, everyone must sow what they can reap, death, is no exception. Opportunities: "magic is the might of our will, the will that the god gave us, for as long as you follow him, your will shall be proven almighty and unbending!" Magic is the base of every being, even if someone has no magic, they still have normal magic with them, which is used as a utility, such as ground control, no matter how blank someone is, magic will always be there for them, for it as the embrace of god. Integrations: every single being in the world has the capability to use magic, everyone can use every single magic, and everyone can create their own signature magic, but for different levels of course, "nothing is equal, but there will always be equity, for the god who taught us how to keep balance and unity." Bonus info: Religion: in my world, there is only one so far in which it is Christianity. "There is only one true god, not the strongest, but he is the mightiest of all things, he is not the most powerful, yet he is the only one who can protect us, not everyone believed in him, but he always protected all of us, despite all of our sins, he was the only one who was there besides us, he was not the most powerful, because he made us the most powerful things ever, but even with our shameful existence in which he regretted that he created us, he still sacrificed himself for us, he might be dead on the eyes of the close minded, but he will always be there for us, no matter what."

I created 5 magic systems and now with this video i can integrate and perfect them, thanks man.

I like that you went over input and output. Because most Magic system writing advice talks about them as if they are the same thing.

Very intriguing! Excited to see additional videos on it, I'm a real estate agent using Boox 10.3 for notes.

What are some of your favorite magic systems from a fantasy story? Are there any that have really stuck with you since you first read or watched them?

i’ve had an idea of my fantasy book since i was like 12 (i’m 23 now) and lately i’ve been working on it. so the thing is that my magic system is an elemental magic, and during past 11 years i stopped myself from working on it so many times because “nah it’s too obvious and familiar and repetitive blahblahblah”, and now i think that i finally did it pretty unique and deep so it can’t be called plagiarized. and then this video pops up. i mean, my magic system is still pretty different, but the concept of plenty elemental spirits and some type of bond with them - man, you made me question myself really hard 😭

In Berserk the elemental magic seems to be based on personality. The magical items begin to bond with the characters. A young wild fighter is given a fire dagger and he immediately stabs the wooden table just to watch it burn. One character is given wind elemental items. He's a very will of the wind type of person who tries to reconcile being pulled around by the will of other people. The main character has a sword that has been soaked in the blood of demons for so long that it's become a dark elemental weapon capable of damaging strong spiritual forces. The magical system is very associated with elemental spirits, but the human world is seen as a spiritual force in itself that is consuming the natural world, destroying all other magic.

I'm just going to throw my protagonist into a generational civil War in a different land he's not from. 😅 As absurd as that may sound right now, That IS the premise of the first leg of his journey. Having the protagonist be confronted with "history in the making" is just a fascinating perspective to me

Your content is brilliant and this video is on point. Thank you very much.

but my prologue is a past event that is also as gripping as my chapter 1 hook. who doesnt like a double hook

My story starts after the first inciting incident. I want to take the approach where what lead to the situation the character is in is revealed later in the story after it gets some setup. The focus of my story is magic. The premise is basically "Harry Potter but set in another realm". More specifically, my character is sent to another realm to learn magic. The story starts on Earth as my MC waits at what is basically the Kingscross Station of my story. This chapter is meant to be juxtaposed with the following chapter when she enters the otherworld-- the setting jumps from a cold winter night to a sunny spring morning. This is meant to reflect my characters mindset and how this is a new chapter for her. Since my story is about magic, i want to introduce it in some way in this opening chapter, i just haven't decided how yet. I'm also worried there won't be enough of a hook introduced here.

There is no such thing as a worldbuilding mistake, but there are narrative mistakes. When worldbuilding, you should focus on the "logic" of the world. The logic is what makes the world believable.

Some of the best books I have ever read make these mistakes.

Id like to say that issue 1 and 2 are not nearly as black and white as you make them seem. There's a big reason why goblins and elves are so common in fantasy despite being so common. It's because the basic idea is so fundamental that it gives the correct idea of what the creature is like, but also gives the freedom to make said goblin something like a mouse that knows how to mug someone or a discriminated, enslaved species that deserves better than they have (my personal choice for my world)

The Silmarilian is just ine big history lesson. 😅

Writing is hard. There are things you shouldn’t do, but can still work if you know how to. But, there are also good things you should limit. For example, grammar. It’s good to have good spelling and coherent dialogue. However… too much of it makes your characters look like robots. How annoying, right?

Hmm, good points

Honestly the way I think about the No Shmerps rule, is that most likely the characters in your Fantasy story aren't canonically speaking the language you are reading it in. It's been "translated" into English, Spanish, etc. So if the language in your story has a different word for "tree", it's just going to be translated to "tree" anyway. The only things that would keep a unique name are NEW concepts, objects and important things that don't currently exist in our dictionaries.

Great stuff. I like the idea of the story question at the beginning; 'It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.' 'It was a pleasure to burn.' 'Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.' And we can't ignore 'In a hole in the ground there lived a Hobbit.' All the great stories start off with a great line and/or the story question.

Since i discovered what an "elf" really was in folklore, you start losing me as soon as you copy over Tolkien's elves.

Hero -> Good Ends; Good Means Villian -> Bad Ends; Bad Means Anti-Hero -> Goods Ends; Bad Means Anti-Villian -> Bad Ends; Good Means ??? Is this a thing? So, like a puppet working for the bad guy who knows no better? Or, is it more a competition; a character that simply contradicts what the hero does, yet plays it fair?

Oxford owes you a refund, hardly critical sdvice, barely a few jelpful tidbits. And overall jist tediously and repetitively explained

@26:00 You mentioned using two devices to take notes as though you shouldn't have to do so. I think it is a natural thing to do when using simpler devices with limited screen real estate, and I have done this for about a year with my cheap tablet and my cheap smart phone. It really is a three device solution, including a blue tooth small keyboard in my lap. I find it a satisfactory solution for studying and taking notes. I am even considering getting a <$100 tablet just to get more screen real estate.

This has definitely helped me learn a bit more about world building but I have to know, what was the music you used?

Right, so... In this video the focus has been almost exclusively on the introduction, and how to grab the reader's attention. In all but one point in this video - namely the one about technical errors - I disagree. Let me start with the first point. Beginning the story "in medias res" as it were, can work no doubt, but not all stories benefit from this approach (i.e. setting-driven stories); Most stories I would argue, benefits from laying the proverbial foundation before anything else, establishing a baseline from which understanding can be built and in many cases removing the very idea of later plot contrivances or Deus ex Machina type scenarios. While clichés are ubiquitous in every genre, working within them rather than against them can very often be to the author and reader's benefit; The author can weave in subtle yet potent threads of nuance which is impossible if one starts the story in an odd or unusual place, the reader is also greeted in a nice and pleasant manner without the need to pay attention to every last detail of the story from second one. Conflict or tension can be excellent motivators for driving the plot or narrative, however, if there is no resolution or time for the characters to breathe it can be exhausting; It is vital to every character based story to have both highs AND lows, pitting the character against an obstacle is reasonable and expected, but after the obstacle is overcome the character/world needs to have a new baseline established before new obstacles can be faced. (Personal Note: I believe the notion of constant tension to be "moviefication" of books, and utterly unnecessary in the medium of litterray storytelling.) Introduction of a lot of characters and concepts might not be the right fit for single POV stories, but in stories with a large cast or setting-based stories it can work if done with care; Letting the reader know there are many elements in the story, only to zoom in bit by bit to all the mentioned elements, and while the balance can be hard to hit, it is a useful part of a storyteller's toolkit. (This is perhaps where I disagree the heaviest, and is most personal.) Keeping description relevant is of course essential to any story, but discarding every bit of detail not directly tied to tension is reductive to the concept of "Mood" or "atmosphere", it is here the writer can stretch the creative muscles and express something more than just action; (Personal) I believe this mentality of cutting to the core of everything is stifling for the art of storytelling, especially as someone who loves it when authors wax poetic or lyrical on one or other thing in a story, and doubly so as I enjoy writing so called "purple prose" with flowery and vivid descriptions. The point about Reader Psychology can be brought into a wider discussion, but pertinent to my disagreement here is this: What readers want is subjective beyond belief, and both subsequent points can be rolled into a single point from before; The introduction of a book is not a "trailer" for the story, as it is not a Movie, and if we are to keep up with this comparison; Not every movie is an action one, some can be documentaries, others short art films, others still can be quiet philosophical pieces. Audiences are not monolithic in their wants, and the publishing industry really has to stop forcing all but a narrow subset of literature out of the limelight. Hope this serves as an understandable critique on the points made in this video. I am as both reader and writer glad to provide my thoughts.

Why do you get so many haters? Like damn

I have a genuine question regarding a potential schmerp in my story, if anyone would like to take the time to give feedback! My world is entirely subterranean, and their source of light (a colossal fungal fruiting body hidden behind a ring of mountains in the center of the world) is unmoving and unchanging. I needed a good way to tell time that didn't depend on any celestial bodies, and since the world is entirely subterranean with a stable heat and light source in the center, i figured the weather would be quite consistent. so i made a system of time based on rains! now, I've written extensively about the weather as a baseline so that future worldbuilding aspects make sense, but I don't want to get into that. my focus here is on the time system. In this world, a rain happens every two weeks, and lasts about 16 hours (counted separately from the two weeks). five rains (10 weeks) is a squall, and five squalls is a blusting. this evens out to 50 weeks a blusting, just 2 weeks shorter than a human year. BUT!!! the accumulated hours of rains, that extra 8 hours worth a week, accommodates for that, making a blusting actually three days longer than a human year. My question is this: I'm keeping the weather system, so 1) do you guys think it's simple and understandable enough as it is, and 2) if not, what do you guys think I should change about it? i suppose i could use weeks/months/years instead of rains/squalls/blustings, but it also doesn't feel quite right to use the name of a measurement that isn't accurate. I'm also still working out the kinks on smaller units of time- I'd love to use hours, days, and minutes, still, so that readers have a baseline on which to understand the rains system. But i need to figure out a way for the people of my world to initially notate what hours are, and how many hours are in a day. We had the sundial, but they don't. I was thinking something mechanical in nature, like a pendulum kept in motion, so that the people of the world could make clocks. for civilization to truly flourish, time needs to be allocated efficiently, and without a way to tell smaller units of time, there is no way to do so. i figure the rains are a much older, more ancient form of telling time, while clocks, based on one central pendulum swinging constantly, are newer and have provided people with a way to measure the length between/of rains. That way, both measurements of time can coexist, with one being more ancestral and the other being more derivative. what do you think? a thank you to anyone who responds with genuine critique!!

Now that is some sound advice.

Awesome channel. Thanks a lot. Great topic and video.

Unfortunately I had left a long and thoughtful comment in which I linked TV Tropes to support the points I made and it got filtered out, so I guess I won't be commenting on this channel anymore.

Maybe a slightly different view on your copypasta comments. I was entirely on board with the broad strokes but then you used specific examples of measurement systems that have medieval or even ancient histories themselves! Meters, degrees centigrade / Fahrenheit, coordinating meetings down to the minute - these are all massively anachronistic to me in fantasy. But yards, miles, dates, and times of day (midday, afternoon, etc) are all totally reasonable to me in fantasy. I do weirdly feel like feet would make me think of dungeons and dragons and that would pull me out of it however…

Theme park is really solid and relevant advice for me...

currently looking at Scrivener tbh, seems like the best option right now. Ive been using Hemingway app but it freezes a lot

Dude. My inciting incident happens in the fourth chapter--because the status quo, as established by several big scenes, is grand in scope (it's sci-fi, with several layers to it). I agree on #1 unilaterally in the case of: romances, thrillers, and mysteries. Fantasy and sci-fi often need a buildup, in my opinion, because their status quo is so different from our everyday world. I do agree that the first scene must be gripping and not tra-la-la, everything's fine, normal, and boring--otherwise, the reader will put the book down.

What about Penzu? It's not fancy, but it's online and autosaves.

I tend to use known concepts in slightly different ways, approximations, or less used. Distances can be measured in days of travel, or paces to walk. I have "beats" (heart beats) for seconds, "tenny" (or "tenday") instead of week, and other things that make sense to modern readers. Instead of schmerps I have variations of real creatures and stuff, like a giant goat as a beast of burden in a mountainous area, or a horse hen for an equally large bird (not actually inspired by a chocobo, but pretty much that). I used to have a different name for elves, but that was always what people were going to think, so I just call them that.