Many of you have commented letting me know that video clip was fake and the woman is a comedian! I had a feeling when I was watching it that it was fabricated but all jokes aside, the sad reality is that there are too many people who REALLY act like that 😂 anyways, thanks to everyone who let me know and I hope you all enjoyed the video!
@@ryantucker2166 its men too, dont kid yourself. you could maybe say, maybe, that at least the men were reactionary. but social media, with its intentional dopamine triggering, has taken the initially decent concept of online dating and warped it into the monster it is now, which has made dating for men and women completely unnatural. and both sides have mutated in their behavior as a result.
The thing is, we live in a world where that type of mindset/behavior is so common to the point where we can barely distinguish the difference between the reality and a comedy skit.
@@robi6317 Do men walk around thinking they are God's gift to women? Just looking at females' body language makes one think that they're celebrities and simps are Paparazzi. Where did chicks get that attitude from? You guessed it-BEING ONLINE WITH THIRSTY SIMPS ALL DAY LONG.
While spending like 90% of their days stuck at home with their parrents and only browsing instagram and only posting pictures of them being places and not having regular fun on daily basis,people nowdays are empty
You can blame the women for that, I don't think most men give a sheet about name brand commodities or lifestyles. All we need are the basics, a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and a purpose in life. Unfortunately the basics don't cut it anymore. You gotta have it all before you can even think of talking to these 'princesses'
Probably the realist video I've seen from Courtney on men challenges with modern dating, including: 1) women having unrealistic expectations, 2) women having too many options, 3) the war between men and women, and 4) women desiring the same sub-set of men (paraphrased) Her advice/solution of becoming the best version of yourself is spot on. I would add finding your purpose and living a social life of abundance (shoutout AMS) so you can be complete on your own. This will open the possibility of attracting the right person rather than chasing the wrong ones.
The great thing about working on yourself is that: 1) you can do it any time; 2) just by preparing for an opportunity, you feel better about yourself. What would be more tragic: to get an opportunity your not ready for, or to be ready for an opportunity that never comes?
Try being ugly, girls don't even want to be your friends/or be seen around you let alone date you. life sucks for us ugly guys and I'm 6'1. So that shows face is more important than height
@@biplav32 no face is, if you are short and good looking women will still at least be your friends and take pictures with you. Tall and below average/ugly girls don't even want to be seen around guys who they find below average looking/ugly.
@@biplav32 why make that comment, what good does that do? Who are you to say his personality is bad, from your comment it would appear that you're the one with the crappy personality. People like you are the worst, trying to prove your worth by putting others down
@@ShaunbirKlair24 Grow a beard then,i know pretty ugly looking guys that are tall and pull lots of girls height is like N1 requirement for like 90% of the girls out there Maybe ur very skinny idk,try lifting weights and grow a beard
True! Unless they athlete or rapper. You see the women they want lol. But yeah we men who watch this channel just want a good woman who brings us peace
*One of the biggest problems with modern dating is the overwhelming choice that comes with dating apps. With so many options, it’s easy to get distracted and forget to invest in the person right in front of you. Real connections require time and effort, not just swiping.*
Yep. Absolutely correct. And in order to fix something, step one is to be able to identify the problem, which is impossible for the majority of women because everything is mens fault.
@@deanchur I believe it, but it doesn’t matter. I been single for the last 4 years because I see no inherent value of sharing my time and resources with today’s modern women. They disgust me.
I can't tell you how nice it is to see a woman who is not only smart and beautiful but really down to earth and sees the reality of how other women out there today apply these double standards to men and have these unrealistic expectations.. I really enjoy your videos, thanks Courtney for the content you put out, you're really helping a lot of guys out there who are completely lost in this crazy and hypocritical world of modern dating. Your boyfriend is an extremely lucky guy to have you. Wish there were more woman out there like you..
I think men can fall in love with an 'average' girl MUCH easier than a woman falling in love with an 'average' guy. It's like social-media-induced super-hypergamy. When you have too many choices combined with this, women habitually toss men aside very easily. Not a good combination.
@@FleetAdmiral833 True. If we were not good enough to date then, why should we think we are good enough now? So we can get dumped later on when something better comes along? Women can be just as shallow as men, or more so, but no one wants to talk about that. Good looking women know how to use their looks to get what they want, and it’s been that way forever.
@@FleetAdmiral833 The most unhappy demographic of "human beings" in the world during the last 5 years is an over 40 year old single woman who makes over 300K a year and has no kids. There are researches that prove these statistics. The sad part is that feminism encourages every woman to fight for the "privilege" of being one of the women in that very same demographic.
The toxic behavior on online dating is actually a gift. You find out immediately if the woman is trash. You don’t have to waste time finding out who they truly are. I see it as a blessing.
Kind of, even some of the "good" ones will end up on there out of curiosity and encouragement from their slutty friends. They'll get used and tossed aside just like most of the women on there and will allow that to taint their perspective going forward.
As a man who likes to understand and have knowledge, I’d totally appreciate a video about the challenges of modern dating for women. Inquiring minds want to know.
I agree with Hafeez and Courtney about “leveling up.” Yes, level up. Don’t be lazy and unmotivated to be the best version of yourself, but for the love of God, be yourself. Do not dramatically change yourself to fit into societies standard and become an unrecognizable version of your true self. Find your purpose and execute it. The rest will follow suit.
The "Best version" of yourself means you have changed into something that isn't you. That is what is meant when people mention that. You aren't good enough as yourself and need to do more. It's not wrong to become more than you are. But a lot of people are going to hate what they have become, or hate what they have to do to become that. Better address that issue beforehand.
This is why I'm with a Filipino woman. I had traveled to the Philippines for business trip for 5 moths and during that time I met a woman there. Its a breath of fresh air. The problem with women here in the US is they have this need and greed for materialistic things. They don't care about anything else. They want lavish lifestyle they see on social media. Social media did not create this, social media has made it known that was already known for years. America is consumerism is killing relationships, women feel the need they need to have everything from nice bags, clothes, huge house, nice cars. They don't want simple things, they want to live like a billionaire. That is the problem.
I completely agree with Courtney Ryan about everything she said & while I fully commend her for her openness & honesty for both identifying the problems & helping to provide an idea of how to fix them, I unfortunately must disagree with her on the solution. Yes, if you want something bad enough, you can get it or make it happen, & I tend to usually agree with that idea, but in The REAL World, we sadly must face the cold-hearted facts of our human body's limitations, mental, physical, & financial. Yes, you could lose weight, get in shape, go to college, get a better job, etc. but even if you truly could achieve ALL of that, it STILL wouldn't solve the problem of the impossibly high expectations that modern women of today are delusional in demanding of men. For example: I could over-haul my lifestyle & try 110% to improve all of my shortcomings from, say a 5.5 average to a 7.5 above average with making $50,000 annually to $75,000 annually along with working out, losing weight getting fit & more in-shape, along with more of everything else (confidence, personality, improved looks, improved clothing & style, better hair, etc.); but, short of plastic surgery & winning the lottery, I would STILL NOT find a romantic partner, bc I'M STILL NOT a 10, so modern women would STILL swipe left on me or ignore me in a club or bar. I'm not trying to criticize Courtney & I admit, I don't have an answer either to resolve the problem facing men in today's completely one-sided & almost futile dating market. As much as I hate to admit it, the choice most men, like myself, have is to either die by my own hand or through nature's eventual inevitability, but either way, regardless, we'll STILL die alone. That said though, I'll NEVER give up trying, bc at least I'll still die alone, but knowing I tried to the bitter end.
"a lot of times, when you're watching this very negative content-all the time-and this is the only type of (thing in society) you're seeing, the only type of content you're consuming, it makes you think that (insert extreme assertion here)." Courtney just summed up how people become radicalized for any cause. Platform algorithms make it even easier for agreeable people to fall down the rabbit hole quickly.
I certainly blame social media as well. Unrealistic expectations, lines get blurred on what people want vs what they can obtain through hard work and determination and in the end turns into mate matching instead of choosing just one person.
Social media has just exposed how people really are. The algorithms only sped up how fast people are quick to adopt new information and values. People have been fighting hard work and evaluating character since before social media.
It does take an introvert to know one when your staring back at them and can see the contemplation in which you talk about these topics with a genuine perspective. Much thanks for just being you, talking about these topics and perspective. We are all ever growing, but it’s obvious you put forth a lot of effort and contemplating on the topics in giving the best of you to make these videos. That quiet introspective personality is a genuine asset.
I’ll add another one: *The drinking is out of control.* Especially in relation to dating. It’s horrifying how some see drinking and dating as tied at the hip.
Great content Courtney, especially the last 2-3 minutes. The advice given in this area of the video helps to lay a great foundation for more success in courting! Knowing your purpose in life is one of the most instrumental keys to finding who is suppose to be in your life. Without this knowledge, individuals are randomly dating anyone and everyone, instead of being able to weed through appropriately to find the suitable partner for them. Additionally, you are absolutely correct about being what you want to attract! Spot on!!! Character, morals, values, physique, kindness, respect, grooming habits... Thank you for establishing such a positive platform to encourage and help so many💕👏🏻🍾
This to me is possibly one of your best videos I’ve watched, Courtney. The way you laid everything out and really got to the bottom of what makes modern dating very much close to a nightmare, was absolutely spot on. Your helpful and practical advice clearly comes out of a sense of love and compassion towards your viewers and we’re here for it! 👍🏼
Courtney, this is one of the BEST advice videos out there. Thank you! It reminds me of something I heard at a Christian singles workshop decades ago. I barely remember the keynote speaker; she wasn't that good, really. The speaker who changed my life was a local area pastor, and I'll never forget what he said; it's a variation of what you often say. He said that asking how to find the right person was asking the wrong question. Asking the wrong questions gets us the wrong answers. He said that the right question to ask is: how can I BE the right person? Would you marry you? Why or why not? To be brutally honest, I wouldn't have married me back then; I had a list of flaws as long as my arm! It took me many years of work to make progress on being the best me I can be. That totally revolutionized my life...
Recently ran across a profile of a woman complaining about the "what do you bring to the table" question then went on to say she was high maintenance and spoiled. Yeah swiped left on that.
Man, I gave up on dating apps. Most of the women I saw on the apps either had children, wore almost nothing, or had crazy expectations. I was swiping left on like 99.9% of the women on there. At that point, there was no point.
@@OperationMI6 That's my issue too. I don't see women close to my age. Most of them are over 40..... Whether it is work or grocery shopping, they are at least 40 years old. Never really had friends growing up in school, so it isn't like I can reach out to a circle of friends. Didn't help having a psychologically abusive twin sister trying to turn everyone at school against me. I'm not going to go to a bar or a church, because that isn't really ideal. There are no cooking classes or adult sport activities in my area. I already know how to cook some really good dishes, like beef wellington. Most places that have volunteer groups are only interested in recruiting kids...... But aside from all of those limitations, I also believe meeting someone in real life is my best opportunity. Even though I haven't been on a date in almost 10 years (a few years away from turning 30)..... But it is whatever. I'm not going to beg for someone to be with me.
Courtney, thank you so, so much for talking about the disparities in online dating experiences between men and women. I always felt it was difficult to get matches on apps like tinder (I would get maybe 2 in a good week) and thought it was due to something I was doing wrong. I had no idea the stats you discussed were so lopsided. There’s a small consolation in understanding the reality of online dating as I continue to improve myself and build my ideal life to eventually share with someone else. Cheers! Please keep up the fantastic work! The world is a better place with your advice.
@@SteinerSE You just word it as a self-employed modelling job or similar and leave out the bit about exposing your cat and melons. That’s if the simps haven’t already donated enough to last you a lifetime by the time your beauty fades. Also, you can always sell your old pics you didn’t use in the past for the future generation’s simps.
Courtney I honestly do appreciate you and the content you bring to us. I truly do see you to be like a big sister who's helping both young and or older men out when it comes to dating, fashion, and other things from a female standpoint. Thank you and stay blessed. 🙏🏾🕊
I'm 41 I've had 2 very serious, 2 semi-serious, and a few lesser than semi-serious but not casual relationships and then a couple years in my late 20s when I tried 'casual' relationships and had a bunch (dozen+) in that period I've NEVER DATED I have never liked the concept of dating, how it 'operates' in all its forms, ever since I was a teenager, it seemed like bad process, mode of operation, etc., - very artificial, very misguided in the 'will this person be ____' for my life mentality that just doesn't work. SO, I have always made it VERY CLEAR, that I ONLY want to hang out and get to know people as friends first, to see if we want to know each other in life, how we get along, and let it grow organically to BE whatever it is between us. If there is chemistry there, it will remain and intensity will grow over time, it DOES NOT need to be acted upon with any immediacy - seriously you can wait 6 months, 2 years, 5 years, to turn things physical, or, take things super-slow once you do decide /can't hold off any more from going physical. This has worked well and while I'm single now after 29-37~ serious relationship toxicity because of previous heart-hurting that made entering that relationship TRAUMA-TERRIBLE choice. which brings me to the next part: most people are full of so much trauma and lack the emotional capacity to even begin to deal with it muchless heal from it to a point where they are healthy enough to enter a serious relationship with another person (especially one where children may result), most people need to not, and take them selves out of the picture for relationships
I'm 29 years of age and I've never had a girlfriend(About to turn 30), I've had some girls who showed interest in high school but I always had a crush on another girl . College maybe 1 girl was interested but I wasn't really interested. I've been on dating apps/sites for a long time now and have had some matches but in recent years I stopped swiping right on everyone and now barely get any. I barely swipe right as the standard of woman has dropped and don't feel like I should give woman likes they don't deserve. Most of them don't show their body, they just have silly filtered pictures , have crazy piercings ect ect. I try and come up with interesting openers but when I have nothing to go off I struggle . Many just have no bio or 1 photo. Like give me something ,put some effort into your profile and optimise your appearance. I found out in recent years I was partly autistic through a series of tests. I prefer my own company but feel the need for companionship. Woman have way to high standards these days it's insane.
@@kylesizemore2751 I have 2 jobs but don't make much money (One is seasonal) the other is a 12 hour contract.. but most of the time i get more than the 12 hours , I'm actually Greek Cypriot(I wonder if that goes against me in looks?) I look like my display picture. ,very slim trying to build up muscle but for my metabolism it seems to be hard , it's very hard to put on weight i've always been skinny. My arms have a good amount but nowhere else
Please get off ALL the apps, they will offer you nothing but depression. Get involved in your community and start meeting people IRL. Just chatting and interacting with anyone is good practice. I am a woman who has been happily married 25 yrs. I gave daughters aged 20 & 18, they are both in college and work. This is where women congregate: health clubs, gyms, tennis clubs,, hiking and outdoor groups, business meet ups by industry, volunteer organizations, churches. Even if you meet older women network with them because they will have daughters and granddaughters. I know two happily married couples who met because family members liked them and introduced them. Apps are toxic, you are right.
@@ItIsMeJamesE yeah man I don't think dating apps are worth it, more importantly they don't teach you how to better socialize and attract women like talking to people IRL does. Also, how did you find out you were autistic? I've often been wondering if I have been undiagnosed myself... lol
@Steve You have more to offer than most Steve , you have a job , a house and you can drive. The issue is the high standard of Woman in this day and age. When they are low standard. They are not the prize you are the prize.
When she said onlyfans we got the exact same expression and I turned to look at you as you turned towards the camera. What a moment of empathy! Our only difference was that I couldn't resist laughing a little.
Honestly this left me feeling a bit discouraged. The content is great and I’m glad the message is being put out there; these are definite issues in the dating world. I’ve been finishing a divorce; my wife left me two years ago and one of her biggest complaints is that we weren’t as affluent or as financially stable as her sister and brother in law. She made the comparison but ignored the fact that they spent 30+ years building up a successful business, as well as our financial situation wasn’t even remotely the same. Making comparisons like that kills relationships, the lens of social media magnifies that to dangerous proportions.
Courtney you're so intelligent and objective and helpful. I love discovering people who give me hope! Hearing you talk about subjects like this is so reassuring knowing intelligent people such as yourself are aware of modern social paradigms and especially toxic one's like the lack of in-person connection. Its my favorite to hear people address stuff like this because it lifts my worry that I might be crazy or alone in my observations. I am very hopeful! I've enjoyed alot of your other videos on all sorts of topics and to everyone else this woman has helped me understand many things on how I can continue to develop myself into a well shaped man and even as a successful person. Thank you and i wish you the best, always
The key is having real life interactions with real life women. I'm thankful that I have a sister around my age, because I know that even though they may be in the minority, not all women are crazy.
Aside from a woman wanting her partner to be a safe person to be around, ie. the guy isn't mentally or physically abusive, I'm done with women claiming their chief preference is because it offers "safety". A tall, hot guy is not guaranteed to be able to physically protect anyone (even himself). I wish women would just be honest. It's okay to prefer whatever you want.
Courtney, I really appreciate how much you care about helping out men in a time where it’s popular to bash and hate on men. I can tell you’re a very compassionate person! You’ve definitely helped me out a lot.
Courtney, you really are incredible, I mean genuinely, as a Psychotherapist, I love people's psychology and I have to read people in various ways, however with you, you're a rare, genuine person who shares real quality - I wish there was a version of you, over here in the UK :)
@@CourtneyRyan no worries at all, i hadnt watched any of your videos for a while, as been busy with work and studies and so on.. so just watched a couple today and you can see that you really care about what you do, your content and your audience, all with a pretty face to as 'a cherry on top' - girls like you, should be the ones that get success :)
You hit the nail on these key points on why there are so many issues with dating! The last 2 years, I've been resetting my mindset on dating cause I had to come to realize that I was the guy whom I was attracting
That was a super video. Very well done as a survey of the modern scene. "A relationship comes with so much forgiveness" is a beautiful gem. You gave a video straight from the heart to the heart. Inspirational.
@@CourtneyRyan Thanks Courtney for your nice response. If you've time please have a think about my post a few days ago re this: Can a woman love two men at once? Women are known for multitasking - can they multilove? They can in my experience. All the best and take care. Alan.
You are speaking the truth, I just tried the dating apps again lol idk why I make 100k+ travel, I’m in shape only 5 9(showed in my pics) maybe that’s the problem 🤷🏼♂️ no luck. But if i go to a bar, i’ll get a number or 2 no problem or take her home but then I’m competing with all their IG DM’s or Dating apps in future or whatever. No one gets laid daily i guess but the top 5% of guys. Anyways I’m done rambling. Courtney Ryan you are awesome don’t stop what you’re doing. You help a lot of men who are probably very confused.
@@brock87___63 come tf on, what are the odds of that happening!? 1/100,000? women face sexual harassment which is terrible and more common than people expect but murder is just hyperbolic pandering
@@brock87___63 if that nonsense is the only thing you can bring up then clearly there a no material issues. The likelihood of any person being murdered is extremely low and it drops even further when you consider murder are committed in certain areas. Here’s some advice though. If you have a strong perception of danger associated with bars and yet you persist in looking for relationships in these places I’d suggest you submit yourself for clinical evaluation.
Many women will say they're insecure because men don't find them attractive. Newsflash, it's probably true. But it's the same when a women won't date a man because he doesn't earn enough. I never said I had a solution, but I see how ugly reality can be.
Hi Courtney, WOW ... I have to say you totally "hit it out of the park" with this video regarding the challenges of modern dating 🤓! Thanks for bringing such honesty, empathy, and insight to a subject which men face all the time when trying to find a special woman (especially with, as you mentioned, the popularity and constant distraction of social media). Honestly, I found it amazing that you were willing to speak out and acknowledge these experiences (it would also be great to learn more about how women cope with online dating too). The points shared in the video are totally on the mark ... my hat is off to you 😊!!! All the best, Dan
Since those dating apps are rigged against men to compete against one another just to get matches from women, I just gave up on dating entirely. Instead I'm chosing to focus on furthering my career to continue building myself up and make more personal connections through my work and hobbies. I appreciate you sharing these facts Courtney and hope you stay safe.
You nailed it Courtney. I'm having a hard time with online dating these days because girls seem to think my stable full time job (working 7 AM - 3 PM) is BORING. They are starting to confuse not investing in crypto for example (or any other get rich quick schemes to live the "high life") to not having any ambition. They're just crazy really. I know there are plenty of fish in the sea, but damn, I must be fishing in the wrong sea every time.
I think it would be very interesting to see a video on the challenges for women. It's important to understand the other side. Great content, Courtney. I found your channel recently and I appreciate the positive, non-toxic, yet honest content.
Courtney you are so honest and real. Am 39 years old. From the age of 15 to 25 i slept with 70 woman. I was doing this in the late 90s to early 2000s . Since then once the internet blew up it all changed. Am from the era in which you can actually go up and talk to girls without them thinking your a creep. Because of technology both woman and men have lost the ability to have a conversation with each other. Back then men took pride in their game. And woman related and appreciated a man who had it. Now it’s all about money fame how cute you are . And the never ending options women have now is crazy. The game has always been set up in favor of woman. But it’s ok. We delt with that. But now I don’t even know what to do when I see a girl I like. Am being turned down by girls I don’t even like. Girls that are 4-5 and are just good enough for late night sex or friendship. It’s insane . I consider my self about a 5-6 . That means some woman think am a little lower and some a little higher. But I can’t get any of them. And it comes down to all the choices woman have. If I had 60 woman swiping right every day on my tinder account I would ghost me too.
hit the nail on the head here. I love your reminders about generalization. Unfortunately, the first hand experience for many men has been 100% negative after many dates. That's harder to deal with, and harder to shake.
I've had it with social media. RUclips's really the only site I can tolerate because it takes actual talent to succeed on. I can't tell you how many times Facebook and Instagram has started unnecessary family drama, it's so dystopian. It's a gigantic jealous fest. RUclips on the other hand is purely videos and most people hate being in front of the camera so it automatically eliminates most of the drama.
I just recently discovered your channel. I enjoy the Versatility, Humility, & Realism in Your Perspective. I've seen you review(so far) a Variety of Folks & Their Approaches to Courtship + Dating Advice: I Appreciate Your Humble & Objective Analysis/Breakdowns of those approaches(I've yet to see you make things personal: Which based on your portfolio; I doubt that's in your character). Wanted to write to say you've managed to carve out a Venerable Exemplary Womanhood Vantage Point‼️KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK 👸🏻😎💯👍🏿
The biggest problem is right at the start. Do I talk to a decent human being or a complete psychopath who feels sexually assaulted for being talked to by me?
11:00 I find 95% of women don't understand that the dating game is vastly different between men and women. Women seem to think dudes are just pumping and dumping women left and right. No. It's the top 5% of men that do that. The average dude fights for scraps and its not even worth it. Especially since dating is more apps than ever. The time spent dating to reward is not worth it. Not anymore. I can send a hundred messages on a dating app, waste my time swiping, and then not get any results for months or I can actually spend that time on my career and make actual progress that I can measure. Imo, women push a lot of decent men out of dating entirely. I'm not a bitter woman hater or something, just the cost benefit analysis? I only have so many hours in a day and it's most productively spent ignoring women. From my friends still actively in it, apparently the apps have gotten way worse. And I noticed bars/clubs/social events are just not as ideal for meeting women as it was 10 years ago.
@@FleetAdmiral833 It's a cultural trough. I have remained single my entire life, and am likely to remain single. My mentality is this; hacking my way through the long slog of my remaining education and future career until, and I am being completely honest here, I find Mrs. Right. A bad day fishing is better than a good day at the office, but you have to put in the hours in the office to afford the hours on the water.
You are spot-on, lots of men self-esteem gets affected in online dating as so many rejections day on daily basis. So I would say don't take the rejection internally, I know it's not easy, this is how it is. Focus on better qualities you have in yourself. Don't let your confidence gets affected by it.
When Courtney talks about some people having no friends and just talking to ppl online......damn, that hit close to home. I think I even wrote this very comment for attention.
Gave up on dating a couple of years ago, too many headaches. This pretty much sums up all of my problems in the one video lol you really head the nail on the head. Awesome content, thank you Courtney! 😃
I've completely given up as well. I just don't care I'll play it safe and just add another layer to the wall of my heart. Dig my moat a foot wider and a foot deeper. Pick up the pieces and move on.
Hi Courtney. I feel like people don’t want to actually try and really date anymore because of the challenges a solid relationship has. Shout out to you for this video!
Courtney I’m glad you made this video because you brought up a subject that my daughter and I argue about all the time. I keep telling her that women and men don’t experience breakups totally different. My ex has moved on while I’m still dealing with my feelings. I told her a women have lines of dudes waiting for the chance because their Value at least at the beginning is between their legs and so the men are competing Against each other snd then be able to get the chicks attention. Females csn destract themselves from a break up to not feel the lonkiness the depression the rejection. So when she keeps telling me to get out there but it’s not the same and so where my ex would be successful I would get rejection and it would be devastating
I’m not kidding after loosing some weight and buying some close that fit me a bit better. I’ve had so many conversations with complete strangers and I didn’t even start more than half of those. It’s really surprising how by just changing a thing or two can make a drastic difference.
Word! I bought new clothes, watch, cologne, shoes and a pendant necklace... All of a sudden all the girls are talking to me and showing interest... I didn't do it for the attention, I did it for me... That's the energy I am projecting and it's compounding with each daily interaction! Love yourself.
@@timothygibney159 try martial arts. Unlike a gym, one will actually go and it works out your body much more efficiently. After 3 weeks at 3 sessions per week, I had a six pack. YMMV, but it put me in the best shape of my life. Hope that helps. Cheers!
The best definition of a "perfect relationship" was the one given by Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting. He said it wasn't a matter of whether or not they/your chosen partner is "perfect" , but whether or not they are "perfect for me/you". Are they willing to accept and even embrace your uniqueness? What are those quirks that you believe you possess that you are often shy about letting other people see/experience. And, when you find that someone whose quirks you can accept and embrace just as easily as they accept yours then it sounds to me like you've got the makings for a beautiful relationship because no one in that kind of relationship is going to be interested in wasting time trying to change the other person. They know how to accept/love you just as you are. There's nothing better.
Courtney, the core issue in dating comes down to women NOT taking responsibility of their actions, while simultaneously expecting men to treat them like princesses and expecting to have all kinds of privileges.
Great video Courtney I can say as a man this is all so true. I had a bumble for a few weeks and did not get one ,watch and also paid for the premium thing. Today as a man you can never admit weakness but I’ll be humble with you and anyone reading this that modern dating has completely destroyed my self worth
@@davidcolwill1773 try not to judge yourself on the validation given by others. Do you like yourself? Good! Because you will be the ONLY person with you every day for the rest of your life. Ironically, the happier you are with yourself, the less others will matter, and the more they will want to be part of that happy life. Sending good vibes over the internetz. Hope that helps. Cheers!
Level up! Great advice. We most certainly can all use self care, self development, self discovery, self discipline, self awareness in our lives. Learn, grow, change, improvement yourself...for yourself! If that benefits someone else in the future, great! Really do it for you, and it will come back to you in many ways.
Good video Courtney Ryan, I just found your channel on my feed. I have seen many FreshandFit, Kievin Samuals, Roommates and many other channels about the issue of dating in the current era. I don't think social media is totally to blame, I think its America consumerism that has been ingrained in our culture for generations. We like to push for individualism and show off success. Social media is now a perfect platform where anyone can do this now. What social media is doing now is showing what we knew for decades about America culture. I actually stepped away from dating and had for a while until 2018. In 2018 the company I used to work for I had sent me to the Philippines for 5 months and during that time I met a great young lady at a park in Manila. From there we connected and main reason is we both like living simple. Lot of Filipinos like living simple even if they have money. They don't show off like how we do in America. As of today we have a daughter together and connection feels stronger. Some ladies I knew back in college that had rejected me tried very hard to shame me for meeting a Filipino woman. I said back to them on social media that "your shame is a way to cover your own misery because of your ridiculous standards and you getting older and not yet married". Never I heard they shame me again and never heard them spoke to me ever again.
This came off as a "women have unrealistic expectations, and I'm one of them. I just happened to have met a man on tinder and he is making money too. Most of the women I know do not date men that make less than they do. But! You as a man, have to level up to match our unrealistic expectations" video. XD lol! This is what's totally wrong with social dating, and Courtney Ryan is an example of it. Remember, in her trail, and in every woman's, there's a trail of good hard working men that were ignores by them and rejected towards their journey to a 20% male. It's disgusting and sad really.
Courtney you truly are a gem. The way you carry yourself is Yin it's full concept. Your character mannerisms and personality quirks embrace feminine energy to a T but you know when to tap into that little yang (masculine) energy when it's necessary to address your advice and input on a situation.
I stopped using tinder for a while. Part of me gave up on apps since I accepted that I'm not on the same level as most girls on tinder. They're usually baddies or average girls with high standards.
Online dating today feels like trying to buy/sell a used car lol. So many people think they’re a Mercedes, but in actuality they’re a high mileage Toyota. Just be real, nothing wrong with a 200,000 mile Honda, with some chipped paint lol
I think too that what this boils down to is a lack of control men believe they're in when in the dating scene. Just know that you need not surrender your time, heart, or mind to anyone. Don't feel that you have to change your nature or compromise yourself. You'll find the right woman, who may not be what you expect, but she'll be right. Thanks Courtney, looking forward to next vid 🙂
There's a vid for you. Set up a dating profile for each of you and Teddy for a week, run them and see the results on each account at the end of the week. See how a high value man and high value woman compare.
People don’t adjust their standards to who they are; This applies to what they can offer Traditional vs non-traditional Courtney strikes me as pretty traditional so she can ask for a traditional man.Lana Rhodes/IG thots can not. Also with Kevin Samuels,the amount of below average women who want a 200k man is astounding.Nobody thinks they are average anymore.
Why would any woman think she is average when Tess Holiday is seen as beautiful and has more orbiters than Jupiter? Come on men would be no different if the average basement dwelling video gamer who has mom feed hot pockets through a mail box slot every 4 hours had a bunch of women blowing up his phone with texts like "daddy I need you right now" He would think he is a stud too. Men are a good part of the problem. Have some damn self respect and stop chasing women with zero to offer. This woman lives in Los Angeles. Of course hypergamy is going to be on steroids. She literally was dating a man with 10+ children from 10+ different women. This woman will settle for nothing less than an 8 even when she is 40. She is signing up to be a perma plate.
The leveling up mantra is a good advice with good intention. However, personally i feel like even if i level up. Its not going to be enough. Im only human with flaws that statistically makes me undesireable in a human system that works against me. I have made peace that i might be dying alone on this earth without knowing the love of a soulmate and thats ok. I wish my fellow good brothers out there in the dating world nothing but the best. You guys are kings
I appreciate your warm, honest, up-front, patient, and respectful approach. You seem wise beyond your years; please keep up the material; I'm sure many men appreciate your service. Since this video are about issues men deal with in the dating field, what are the issues that women have to deal with, and what can we men do to minimize our part in those pressures?
Many of you have commented letting me know that video clip was fake and the woman is a comedian! I had a feeling when I was watching it that it was fabricated but all jokes aside, the sad reality is that there are too many people who REALLY act like that 😂 anyways, thanks to everyone who let me know and I hope you all enjoyed the video!
u got trolled bro!
The problem with modern dating is modern women.
@@ryantucker2166 its men too, dont kid yourself. you could maybe say, maybe, that at least the men were reactionary. but social media, with its intentional dopamine triggering, has taken the initially decent concept of online dating and warped it into the monster it is now, which has made dating for men and women completely unnatural. and both sides have mutated in their behavior as a result.
The thing is, we live in a world where that type of mindset/behavior is so common to the point where we can barely distinguish the difference between the reality and a comedy skit.
@@robi6317 Do men walk around thinking they are God's gift to women? Just looking at females' body language makes one think that they're celebrities and simps are Paparazzi. Where did chicks get that attitude from? You guessed it-BEING ONLINE WITH THIRSTY SIMPS ALL DAY LONG.
people think living the typical "Average Life" is boring, they want the social media lifestyle now. That's why dating has become so toxic
While spending like 90% of their days stuck at home with their parrents and only browsing instagram and only posting pictures of them being places and not having regular fun on daily basis,people nowdays are empty
Absolutely
We have an overstimulated society. Drives unsatisfied people to consumerism.
You can blame the women for that, I don't think most men give a sheet about name brand commodities or lifestyles. All we need are the basics, a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and a purpose in life. Unfortunately the basics don't cut it anymore. You gotta have it all before you can even think of talking to these 'princesses'
@@abstractioner3071 True, which is I hire women.
5 matches a day!?!?
That guy was killing it 😂😂
Fr
That was a Chad
Dude this is so true it’s not even funny
I’m lucky to get like 2 or 3. On a good week. More reason to up my game and be a better person lol
@@connorblair765 I attract the out of State, elderly, out of shape, crazy looking, and so on.
Probably the realist video I've seen from Courtney on men challenges with modern dating, including:
1) women having unrealistic expectations,
2) women having too many options,
3) the war between men and women, and
4) women desiring the same sub-set of men (paraphrased)
Her advice/solution of becoming the best version of yourself is spot on. I would add finding your purpose and living a social life of abundance (shoutout AMS) so you can be complete on your own.
This will open the possibility of attracting the right person rather than chasing the wrong ones.
The great thing about working on yourself is that: 1) you can do it any time; 2) just by preparing for an opportunity, you feel better about yourself. What would be more tragic: to get an opportunity your not ready for, or to be ready for an opportunity that never comes?
What about chasing the right ones?
When we live in a day and age where being considered "average" is an insult, of course the dating market is going to be messed up.
Try being ugly, girls don't even want to be your friends/or be seen around you let alone date you. life sucks for us ugly guys and I'm 6'1. So that shows face is more important than height
@@ShaunbirKlair24 height is more important . You just have bad personality lol
@@biplav32 no face is, if you are short and good looking women will still at least be your friends and take pictures with you. Tall and below average/ugly girls don't even want to be seen around guys who they find below average looking/ugly.
@@biplav32 why make that comment, what good does that do? Who are you to say his personality is bad, from your comment it would appear that you're the one with the crappy personality. People like you are the worst, trying to prove your worth by putting others down
@@ShaunbirKlair24 Grow a beard then,i know pretty ugly looking guys that are tall and pull lots of girls height is like N1 requirement for like 90% of the girls out there
Maybe ur very skinny idk,try lifting weights and grow a beard
Most men don't want a 10 we just want a nice lady..
💯 comment of the day
True! Unless they athlete or rapper. You see the women they want lol. But yeah we men who watch this channel just want a good woman who brings us peace
@Lord Sidious They want the bad boys to be nice to them
We want good girls
Very much true
*One of the biggest problems with modern dating is the overwhelming choice that comes with dating apps. With so many options, it’s easy to get distracted and forget to invest in the person right in front of you. Real connections require time and effort, not just swiping.*
I love how these women believe that having an Onlyfans site is considered, "owning a business".
They don't even own their bodies...
@@JoseyWales1865 lmaoo
Just made a video on that smh
Owning the golden poontan. 💰
How do you they get away with it when they married?? In love with $$$ much? Mercedes Terrell I'm looking at you!!...
You cannot fix dating problems. You can only fix yourself, values, ethics, and principles.
Yep. Absolutely correct. And in order to fix something, step one is to be able to identify the problem, which is impossible for the majority of women because everything is mens fault.
Cant fix height tho.
@@大星星16 True, I’m 6’4” so I’m cool there.
@@IntrovertidoTieneFlow I'm 6'4" as well. Give it a few years a 6'6" will be the new minimum.
@@deanchur I believe it, but it doesn’t matter. I been single for the last 4 years because I see no inherent value of sharing my time and resources with today’s modern women. They disgust me.
I can't tell you how nice it is to see a woman who is not only smart and beautiful but really down to earth and sees the reality of how other women out there today apply these double standards to men and have these unrealistic expectations.. I really enjoy your videos, thanks Courtney for the content you put out, you're really helping a lot of guys out there who are completely lost in this crazy and hypocritical world of modern dating. Your boyfriend is an extremely lucky guy to have you. Wish there were more woman out there like you..
I think men can fall in love with an 'average' girl MUCH easier than a woman falling in love with an 'average' guy. It's like social-media-induced super-hypergamy. When you have too many choices combined with this, women habitually toss men aside very easily. Not a good combination.
Depends on how big of a checkbook or bank account the "average guy" has.
I feel the same way about this, especially when a woman, who rejects you, decides she likes you years later. It’s like, too late Babe!
@@FleetAdmiral833 True. If we were not good enough to date then, why should we think we are good enough now? So we can get dumped later on when something better comes along? Women can be just as shallow as men, or more so, but no one wants to talk about that. Good looking women know how to use their looks to get what they want, and it’s been that way forever.
@@FleetAdmiral833 The most unhappy demographic of "human beings" in the world during the last 5 years is an over 40 year old single woman who makes over 300K a year and has no kids. There are researches that prove these statistics. The sad part is that feminism encourages every woman to fight for the "privilege" of being one of the women in that very same demographic.
@@alanc7827 BEEN THERE!!!
The toxic behavior on online dating is actually a gift. You find out immediately if the woman is trash. You don’t have to waste time finding out who they truly are. I see it as a blessing.
So true!
To be fair if a female is using dating apps she is by default trash.
Kind of, even some of the "good" ones will end up on there out of curiosity and encouragement from their slutty friends. They'll get used and tossed aside just like most of the women on there and will allow that to taint their perspective going forward.
😂
too true!!
As a man who likes to understand and have knowledge, I’d totally appreciate a video about the challenges of modern dating for women. Inquiring minds want to know.
Most guys just wanna F and dont want to deal with bs. The dating experience just isnt fun for most guys
It'll have to be about the invisible women. The hot girls are having a great time.
I agree with Hafeez and Courtney about “leveling up.” Yes, level up. Don’t be lazy and unmotivated to be the best version of yourself, but for the love of God, be yourself. Do not dramatically change yourself to fit into societies standard and become an unrecognizable version of your true self.
Find your purpose and execute it. The rest will follow suit.
be successful like Dr. Dre, lol
The "Best version" of yourself means you have changed into something that isn't you. That is what is meant when people mention that. You aren't good enough as yourself and need to do more. It's not wrong to become more than you are. But a lot of people are going to hate what they have become, or hate what they have to do to become that. Better address that issue beforehand.
And don't turn into a sheep to be the same as other people.
@@oceanhedonist265 that too.
This is why I'm with a Filipino woman. I had traveled to the Philippines for business trip for 5 moths and during that time I met a woman there. Its a breath of fresh air. The problem with women here in the US is they have this need and greed for materialistic things. They don't care about anything else. They want lavish lifestyle they see on social media. Social media did not create this, social media has made it known that was already known for years. America is consumerism is killing relationships, women feel the need they need to have everything from nice bags, clothes, huge house, nice cars. They don't want simple things, they want to live like a billionaire. That is the problem.
I completely agree with Courtney Ryan about everything she said & while I fully commend her for her openness & honesty for both identifying the problems & helping to provide an idea of how to fix them, I unfortunately must disagree with her on the solution. Yes, if you want something bad enough, you can get it or make it happen, & I tend to usually agree with that idea, but in The REAL World, we sadly must face the cold-hearted facts of our human body's limitations, mental, physical, & financial. Yes, you could lose weight, get in shape, go to college, get a better job, etc. but even if you truly could achieve ALL of that, it STILL wouldn't solve the problem of the impossibly high expectations that modern women of today are delusional in demanding of men.
For example: I could over-haul my lifestyle & try 110% to improve all of my shortcomings from, say a 5.5 average to a 7.5 above average with making $50,000 annually to $75,000 annually along with working out, losing weight getting fit & more in-shape, along with more of everything else (confidence, personality, improved looks, improved clothing & style, better hair, etc.); but, short of plastic surgery & winning the lottery, I would STILL NOT find a romantic partner, bc I'M STILL NOT a 10, so modern women would STILL swipe left on me or ignore me in a club or bar.
I'm not trying to criticize Courtney & I admit, I don't have an answer either to resolve the problem facing men in today's completely one-sided & almost futile dating market. As much as I hate to admit it, the choice most men, like myself, have is to either die by my own hand or through nature's eventual inevitability, but either way, regardless, we'll STILL die alone. That said though, I'll NEVER give up trying, bc at least I'll still die alone, but knowing I tried to the bitter end.
The amount of awareness she has is incredible.
Slightly unnerving given her age! While there are sensible women out there, they're rarely giving advice on RUclips.
She is the wisest woman in the whole world...
Malayali ?
@@kzal421 Yup!
@@keralytekid namaskaaram !
Ivde um malayali ye expect cheythillaa
Court ur vids are so wholesome, you can tell how honest, you’re being - 🖤
I found the healthy side of RUclips. Thank you, Courtney!
❤️👏🏼 happy you’re here!
"a lot of times, when you're watching this very negative content-all the time-and this is the only type of (thing in society) you're seeing, the only type of content you're consuming, it makes you think that (insert extreme assertion here)."
Courtney just summed up how people become radicalized for any cause. Platform algorithms make it even easier for agreeable people to fall down the rabbit hole quickly.
yup. narrowcasting and echo chambers. Gotta preach to that choir!
I certainly blame social media as well. Unrealistic expectations, lines get blurred on what people want vs what they can obtain through hard work and determination and in the end turns into mate matching instead of choosing just one person.
Social media has just exposed how people really are. The algorithms only sped up how fast people are quick to adopt new information and values. People have been fighting hard work and evaluating character since before social media.
It does take an introvert to know one when your staring back at them and can see the contemplation in which you talk about these topics with a genuine perspective. Much thanks for just being you, talking about these topics and perspective. We are all ever growing, but it’s obvious you put forth a lot of effort and contemplating on the topics in giving the best of you to make these videos. That quiet introspective personality is a genuine asset.
I’ll add another one: *The drinking is out of control.* Especially in relation to dating. It’s horrifying how some see drinking and dating as tied at the hip.
Totally agree
Puts me a bit at an disadvantage as I never touch alcohol and never have been drunk in my life. You make a good point.
This.
Drinking sucks for me so I quit 3 days ago ... one moment at a time . #recovery
@@Salem3x3 Keep strong, it probably won't be easy, but for your own sake it's worth it.
Great content Courtney, especially the last 2-3 minutes. The advice given in this area of the video helps to lay a great foundation for more success in courting! Knowing your purpose in life is one of the most instrumental keys to finding who is suppose to be in your life. Without this knowledge, individuals are randomly dating anyone and everyone, instead of being able to weed through appropriately to find the suitable partner for them.
Additionally, you are absolutely correct about being what you want to attract! Spot on!!! Character, morals, values, physique, kindness, respect, grooming habits... Thank you for establishing such a positive platform to encourage and help so many💕👏🏻🍾
Great points! Well said!!
@@waffles1828 Thank you!💗
You should not be single I been all my life and never married or kids .I'm not on other social media only on here .
This to me is possibly one of your best videos I’ve watched, Courtney. The way you laid everything out and really got to the bottom of what makes modern dating very much close to a nightmare, was absolutely spot on.
Your helpful and practical advice clearly comes out of a sense of love and compassion towards your viewers and we’re here for it! 👍🏼
Courtney, this is one of the BEST advice videos out there. Thank you! It reminds me of something I heard at a Christian singles workshop decades ago. I barely remember the keynote speaker; she wasn't that good, really. The speaker who changed my life was a local area pastor, and I'll never forget what he said; it's a variation of what you often say. He said that asking how to find the right person was asking the wrong question. Asking the wrong questions gets us the wrong answers. He said that the right question to ask is: how can I BE the right person? Would you marry you? Why or why not? To be brutally honest, I wouldn't have married me back then; I had a list of flaws as long as my arm! It took me many years of work to make progress on being the best me I can be. That totally revolutionized my life...
Recently ran across a profile of a woman complaining about the "what do you bring to the table" question then went on to say she was high maintenance and spoiled. Yeah swiped left on that.
And I bet you a lot of simps were okay with that, which is why she'll never stop doing it. Always remember: the simps put them there.
Man, I gave up on dating apps. Most of the women I saw on the apps either had children, wore almost nothing, or had crazy expectations. I was swiping left on like 99.9% of the women on there. At that point, there was no point.
@@OperationMI6 That's my issue too. I don't see women close to my age. Most of them are over 40..... Whether it is work or grocery shopping, they are at least 40 years old. Never really had friends growing up in school, so it isn't like I can reach out to a circle of friends. Didn't help having a psychologically abusive twin sister trying to turn everyone at school against me.
I'm not going to go to a bar or a church, because that isn't really ideal. There are no cooking classes or adult sport activities in my area. I already know how to cook some really good dishes, like beef wellington. Most places that have volunteer groups are only interested in recruiting kids......
But aside from all of those limitations, I also believe meeting someone in real life is my best opportunity. Even though I haven't been on a date in almost 10 years (a few years away from turning 30)..... But it is whatever. I'm not going to beg for someone to be with me.
Courtney, thank you so, so much for talking about the disparities in online dating experiences between men and women. I always felt it was difficult to get matches on apps like tinder (I would get maybe 2 in a good week) and thought it was due to something I was doing wrong. I had no idea the stats you discussed were so lopsided. There’s a small consolation in understanding the reality of online dating as I continue to improve myself and build my ideal life to eventually share with someone else. Cheers! Please keep up the fantastic work! The world is a better place with your advice.
If you say Only Fans is your job, you'll never be anything more than just a fling on the side.
What I wonder is, what career can you have with only "Former OnlyFans model" on your resume when you eventually have to move on?
@@SteinerSE You just word it as a self-employed modelling job or similar and leave out the bit about exposing your cat and melons. That’s if the simps haven’t already donated enough to last you a lifetime by the time your beauty fades. Also, you can always sell your old pics you didn’t use in the past for the future generation’s simps.
@@SteinerSE escort or fast food worker.
Does OnlyFans have a retirement plan?
Only Fans is NOT a job.............
Courtney I honestly do appreciate you and the content you bring to us. I truly do see you to be like a big sister who's helping both young and or older men out when it comes to dating, fashion, and other things from a female standpoint. Thank you and stay blessed. 🙏🏾🕊
I'm 41
I've had 2 very serious, 2 semi-serious, and a few lesser than semi-serious but not casual relationships
and then a couple years in my late 20s when I tried 'casual' relationships and had a bunch (dozen+) in that period
I've NEVER DATED
I have never liked the concept of dating, how it 'operates' in all its forms, ever since I was a teenager, it seemed like bad process, mode of operation, etc., - very artificial, very misguided in the 'will this person be ____' for my life mentality that just doesn't work.
SO, I have always made it VERY CLEAR, that I ONLY want to hang out and get to know people as friends first, to see if we want to know each other in life, how we get along, and let it grow organically to BE whatever it is between us. If there is chemistry there, it will remain and intensity will grow over time, it DOES NOT need to be acted upon with any immediacy - seriously you can wait 6 months, 2 years, 5 years, to turn things physical, or, take things super-slow once you do decide /can't hold off any more from going physical.
This has worked well and while I'm single now after 29-37~ serious relationship toxicity because of previous heart-hurting that made entering that relationship TRAUMA-TERRIBLE choice.
which brings me to the next part:
most people are full of so much trauma and lack the emotional capacity to even begin to deal with it muchless heal from it to a point where they are healthy enough to enter a serious relationship with another person (especially one where children may result), most people need to not, and take them selves out of the picture for relationships
I'm 29 years of age and I've never had a girlfriend(About to turn 30), I've had some girls who showed interest in high school but I always had a crush on another girl . College maybe 1 girl was interested but I wasn't really interested. I've been on dating apps/sites for a long time now and have had some matches but in recent years I stopped swiping right on everyone and now barely get any. I barely swipe right as the standard of woman has dropped and don't feel like I should give woman likes they don't deserve. Most of them don't show their body, they just have silly filtered pictures , have crazy piercings ect ect. I try and come up with interesting openers but when I have nothing to go off I struggle . Many just have no bio or 1 photo. Like give me something ,put some effort into your profile and optimise your appearance. I found out in recent years I was partly autistic through a series of tests. I prefer my own company but feel the need for companionship. Woman have way to high standards these days it's insane.
@hikikomoribrah some of them are some aren't that's for sure
@@kylesizemore2751 I have 2 jobs but don't make much money (One is seasonal) the other is a 12 hour contract.. but most of the time i get more than the 12 hours , I'm actually Greek Cypriot(I wonder if that goes against me in looks?) I look like my display picture. ,very slim trying to build up muscle but for my metabolism it seems to be hard , it's very hard to put on weight i've always been skinny. My arms have a good amount but nowhere else
Please get off ALL the apps, they will offer you nothing but depression. Get involved in your community and start meeting people IRL. Just chatting and interacting with anyone is good practice. I am a woman who has been happily married 25 yrs. I gave daughters aged 20 & 18, they are both in college and work. This is where women congregate: health clubs, gyms, tennis clubs,, hiking and outdoor groups, business meet ups by industry, volunteer organizations, churches. Even if you meet older women network with them because they will have daughters and granddaughters. I know two happily married couples who met because family members liked them and introduced them. Apps are toxic, you are right.
@@ItIsMeJamesE yeah man I don't think dating apps are worth it, more importantly they don't teach you how to better socialize and attract women like talking to people IRL does.
Also, how did you find out you were autistic? I've often been wondering if I have been undiagnosed myself... lol
@Steve You have more to offer than most Steve , you have a job , a house and you can drive. The issue is the high standard of Woman in this day and age. When they are low standard. They are not the prize you are the prize.
When she said onlyfans we got the exact same expression and I turned to look at you as you turned towards the camera. What a moment of empathy! Our only difference was that I couldn't resist laughing a little.
I like the way courtney simplifies things. No tricks no gimmicks. Such a positive aura
Thank you ❤️
Honestly this left me feeling a bit discouraged. The content is great and I’m glad the message is being put out there; these are definite issues in the dating world.
I’ve been finishing a divorce; my wife left me two years ago and one of her biggest complaints is that we weren’t as affluent or as financially stable as her sister and brother in law. She made the comparison but ignored the fact that they spent 30+ years building up a successful business, as well as our financial situation wasn’t even remotely the same. Making comparisons like that kills relationships, the lens of social media magnifies that to dangerous proportions.
Been off social media for 4 years so yes finding Someone in person is ROUGH.
Courtney you're so intelligent and objective and helpful. I love discovering people who give me hope! Hearing you talk about subjects like this is so reassuring knowing intelligent people such as yourself are aware of modern social paradigms and especially toxic one's like the lack of in-person connection. Its my favorite to hear people address stuff like this because it lifts my worry that I might be crazy or alone in my observations. I am very hopeful! I've enjoyed alot of your other videos on all sorts of topics and to everyone else this woman has helped me understand many things on how I can continue to develop myself into a well shaped man and even as a successful person. Thank you and i wish you the best, always
The key is having real life interactions with real life women. I'm thankful that I have a sister around my age, because I know that even though they may be in the minority, not all women are crazy.
Not easy if you don’t know any women or your job has no women. Or you don’t know anybody who can introduce you to any.
Aside from a woman wanting her partner to be a safe person to be around, ie. the guy isn't mentally or physically abusive, I'm done with women claiming their chief preference is because it offers "safety". A tall, hot guy is not guaranteed to be able to physically protect anyone (even himself). I wish women would just be honest. It's okay to prefer whatever you want.
Courtney, I really appreciate how much you care about helping out men in a time where it’s popular to bash and hate on men. I can tell you’re a very compassionate person! You’ve definitely helped me out a lot.
100% true, it's all a competition, no genuine love 😘
Courtney, you really are incredible, I mean genuinely, as a Psychotherapist, I love people's psychology and I have to read people in various ways, however with you, you're a rare, genuine person who shares real quality - I wish there was a version of you, over here in the UK :)
Thank you, Ray! I appreciate it ❤️
@@CourtneyRyan no worries at all, i hadnt watched any of your videos for a while, as been busy with work and studies and so on.. so just watched a couple today and you can see that you really care about what you do, your content and your audience, all with a pretty face to as 'a cherry on top' - girls like you, should be the ones that get success :)
You hit the nail on these key points on why there are so many issues with dating! The last 2 years, I've been resetting my mindset on dating cause I had to come to realize that I was the guy whom I was attracting
This is why I think it's very important for men and women to have hobbies where they have a chance of meeting someone from the opposite sex.
Always positive and healthy attitude from you ! Thank you! Keep sharing!
That was a super video. Very well done as a survey of the modern scene. "A relationship comes with so much forgiveness" is a beautiful gem. You gave a video straight from the heart to the heart. Inspirational.
Thank you, Alan ❤️
@@CourtneyRyan he’s right - you’re doing a lot to cheer us up. That watch dealer guy had better wife you up soon!
@@CourtneyRyan Thanks Courtney for your nice response. If you've time please have a think about my post a few days ago re this: Can a woman love two men at once? Women are known for multitasking - can they multilove? They can in my experience. All the best and take care. Alan.
@@alancook9102 that’s a very interesting topic. I’ll have to give it a shot!
You are speaking the truth, I just tried the dating apps again lol idk why I make 100k+ travel, I’m in shape only 5 9(showed in my pics) maybe that’s the problem 🤷🏼♂️ no luck. But if i go to a bar, i’ll get a number or 2 no problem or take her home but then I’m competing with all their IG DM’s or Dating apps in future or whatever. No one gets laid daily i guess but the top 5% of guys. Anyways I’m done rambling. Courtney Ryan you are awesome don’t stop what you’re doing. You help a lot of men who are probably very confused.
Honestly this true and I’m glad there’s a way to fix them got to make improvements as a man love your hard work 💯
❤️❤️
You must be a female behind this account because real men know vvvomen screwed it up and we're not fixing anything they broke
@@Mr2MuchJuice4U Why would we even want to fix it at this point? It's all too little too late. Just let it burn.
Your voice is melodious and your presentation measured. Your presentation makes one return to your channel time and again.
Id like to see the issues women face in dating today as well.
Women literally face the possibility of being murdered everytime they turn a guy down at the bar... For starters.
@@brock87___63 come tf on, what are the odds of that happening!? 1/100,000?
women face sexual harassment which is terrible and more common than people expect but murder is just hyperbolic pandering
@@brock87___63 if that nonsense is the only thing you can bring up then clearly there a no material issues. The likelihood of any person being murdered is extremely low and it drops even further when you consider murder are committed in certain areas. Here’s some advice though. If you have a strong perception of danger associated with bars and yet you persist in looking for relationships in these places I’d suggest you submit yourself for clinical evaluation.
@@jenlet3956 Becuase women are angels ... You know men commit suicide because of men .... Do I say that is the norm, no
Many women will say they're insecure because men don't find them attractive. Newsflash, it's probably true. But it's the same when a women won't date a man because he doesn't earn enough. I never said I had a solution, but I see how ugly reality can be.
Cortney, your canal looks to be a lighthouse for the adequate peoples. I appreciate your approach a lot!
Gosh i swear, Courtney is so innocent. Her reactions are so funny and wholesome. 😄Bless you girl
Hi Courtney,
WOW ... I have to say you totally "hit it out of the park" with this video regarding the challenges of modern dating 🤓! Thanks for bringing such honesty, empathy, and insight to a subject which men face all the time when trying to find a special woman (especially with, as you mentioned, the popularity and constant distraction of social media). Honestly, I found it amazing that you were willing to speak out and acknowledge these experiences (it would also be great to learn more about how women cope with online dating too). The points shared in the video are totally on the mark ... my hat is off to you 😊!!!
All the best,
Dan
Since those dating apps are rigged against men to compete against one another just to get matches from women, I just gave up on dating entirely. Instead I'm chosing to focus on furthering my career to continue building myself up and make more personal connections through my work and hobbies. I appreciate you sharing these facts Courtney and hope you stay safe.
I'm glad you are keeping vigilant and the correct mindset on how things are now days.
You nailed it Courtney. I'm having a hard time with online dating these days because girls seem to think my stable full time job (working 7 AM - 3 PM) is BORING. They are starting to confuse not investing in crypto for example (or any other get rich quick schemes to live the "high life") to not having any ambition. They're just crazy really. I know there are plenty of fish in the sea, but damn, I must be fishing in the wrong sea every time.
Amen. It feels like if anything might make the "vibe" less than "100%" at all times, just on to the next.
I think it would be very interesting to see a video on the challenges for women. It's important to understand the other side. Great content, Courtney. I found your channel recently and I appreciate the positive, non-toxic, yet honest content.
I can do that! Thanks for being here ❤️
Courtney, because of my past there are very few people that I would truely like to get to know better but YOU are one of them.
Courtney watching Kevin Samuels and enjoying it made my day😌
Courtney you are so honest and real. Am 39 years old. From the age of 15 to 25 i slept with 70 woman. I was doing this in the late 90s to early 2000s . Since then once the internet blew up it all changed. Am from the era in which you can actually go up and talk to girls without them thinking your a creep. Because of technology both woman and men have lost the ability to have a conversation with each other. Back then men took pride in their game. And woman related and appreciated a man who had it. Now it’s all about money fame how cute you are . And the never ending options women have now is crazy. The game has always been set up in favor of woman. But it’s ok. We delt with that. But now I don’t even know what to do when I see a girl I like. Am being turned down by girls I don’t even like. Girls that are 4-5 and are just good enough for late night sex or friendship. It’s insane . I consider my self about a 5-6 . That means some woman think am a little lower and some a little higher. But I can’t get any of them. And it comes down to all the choices woman have. If I had 60 woman swiping right every day on my tinder account I would ghost me too.
I'd love to hear how you go about meeting people other than through the dating apps.
hit the nail on the head here. I love your reminders about generalization. Unfortunately, the first hand experience for many men has been 100% negative after many dates. That's harder to deal with, and harder to shake.
I've had it with social media. RUclips's really the only site I can tolerate because it takes actual talent to succeed on. I can't tell you how many times Facebook and Instagram has started unnecessary family drama, it's so dystopian. It's a gigantic jealous fest. RUclips on the other hand is purely videos and most people hate being in front of the camera so it automatically eliminates most of the drama.
People think I am weird that I don’t have an IG. I don’t have time and energy for that.
I just recently discovered your channel. I enjoy the Versatility, Humility, & Realism in Your Perspective. I've seen you review(so far) a Variety of Folks & Their Approaches to Courtship + Dating Advice: I Appreciate Your Humble & Objective Analysis/Breakdowns of those approaches(I've yet to see you make things personal: Which based on your portfolio; I doubt that's in your character).
Wanted to write to say you've managed to carve out a Venerable Exemplary Womanhood Vantage Point‼️KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK 👸🏻😎💯👍🏿
The biggest problem is right at the start. Do I talk to a decent human being or a complete psychopath who feels sexually assaulted for being talked to by me?
Too many psychos lately. 🙁
You are smart and thorough. This video and your platform is so necessary. Thank you for being so real.
11:00 I find 95% of women don't understand that the dating game is vastly different between men and women. Women seem to think dudes are just pumping and dumping women left and right. No. It's the top 5% of men that do that. The average dude fights for scraps and its not even worth it. Especially since dating is more apps than ever. The time spent dating to reward is not worth it. Not anymore. I can send a hundred messages on a dating app, waste my time swiping, and then not get any results for months or I can actually spend that time on my career and make actual progress that I can measure. Imo, women push a lot of decent men out of dating entirely. I'm not a bitter woman hater or something, just the cost benefit analysis? I only have so many hours in a day and it's most productively spent ignoring women. From my friends still actively in it, apparently the apps have gotten way worse. And I noticed bars/clubs/social events are just not as ideal for meeting women as it was 10 years ago.
@@FleetAdmiral833 It's a cultural trough. I have remained single my entire life, and am likely to remain single. My mentality is this; hacking my way through the long slog of my remaining education and future career until, and I am being completely honest here, I find Mrs. Right. A bad day fishing is better than a good day at the office, but you have to put in the hours in the office to afford the hours on the water.
So true.
You are spot-on, lots of men self-esteem gets affected in online dating as so many rejections day on daily basis. So I would say don't take the rejection internally, I know it's not easy, this is how it is. Focus on better qualities you have in yourself. Don't let your confidence gets affected by it.
"Did you go to college?"
YES*
"What do you do for a living?"
ONLYFANS
LOL!
to be honest she probably learnt alot in college dorms that she put to use on onlyfans
Point where I failed "try not laugh"
@@moosevision8113 I read somewhere somewhere some colleges offer it as a "business class." Maybe it is the profession of the future for women.
That's what get when you to University called "ACDC" 😅😅😅
I started laughing so much when she said that jajajajajjajajajajjajaj
I love your take on the men vs women 'war'. Couldn't agree more.
When Courtney talks about some people having no friends and just talking to ppl online......damn, that hit close to home. I think I even wrote this very comment for attention.
Thanks for your honesty. I hope you have an awesome week!
Dammm
Gave up on dating a couple of years ago, too many headaches. This pretty much sums up all of my problems in the one video lol you really head the nail on the head. Awesome content, thank you Courtney! 😃
I've tried tinder before i sucked on it so i gave up dating last year anyway because I'm sick and tired of being hurt all my life.
@@Robot50000 churches sound good besides that's where the good clean Christian women at right?
I've completely given up as well. I just don't care I'll play it safe and just add another layer to the wall of my heart. Dig my moat a foot wider and a foot deeper. Pick up the pieces and move on.
Hi Courtney. I feel like people don’t want to actually try and really date anymore because of the challenges a solid relationship has. Shout out to you for this video!
I think that men just need to stop using Tinder and other dating apps. Just as a protest
Courtney I’m glad you made this video because you brought up a subject that my daughter and I argue about all the time. I keep telling her that women and men don’t experience breakups totally different. My ex has moved on while I’m still dealing with my feelings. I told her a women have lines of dudes waiting for the chance because their Value at least at the beginning is between their legs and so the men are competing Against each other snd then be able to get the chicks attention. Females csn destract themselves from a break up to not feel the lonkiness the depression the rejection. So when she keeps telling me to get out there but it’s not the same and so where my ex would be successful I would get rejection and it would be devastating
I’m not kidding after loosing some weight and buying some close that fit me a bit better. I’ve had so many conversations with complete strangers and I didn’t even start more than half of those. It’s really surprising how by just changing a thing or two can make a drastic difference.
Word!
I bought new clothes, watch, cologne, shoes and a pendant necklace...
All of a sudden all the girls are talking to me and showing interest... I didn't do it for the attention, I did it for me... That's the energy I am projecting and it's compounding with each daily interaction!
Love yourself.
How did you do it. I am struggling with weight loss and I don't even like a pig either
@@timothygibney159 try martial arts. Unlike a gym, one will actually go and it works out your body much more efficiently. After 3 weeks at 3 sessions per week, I had a six pack. YMMV, but it put me in the best shape of my life. Hope that helps.
Cheers!
The best definition of a "perfect relationship" was the one given by Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting.
He said it wasn't a matter of whether or not they/your chosen partner is "perfect" , but whether or not they are "perfect for me/you".
Are they willing to accept and even embrace your uniqueness?
What are those quirks that you believe you possess that you are often shy about letting other people see/experience.
And, when you find that someone whose quirks you can accept and embrace just as easily as they accept yours then it sounds to me like you've got the makings for a beautiful relationship because no one in that kind of relationship is going to be interested in wasting time trying to change the other person.
They know how to accept/love you just as you are.
There's nothing better.
I'm having a hard time listening to their expectations
Right lol
@@CourtneyRyan Lol for real 🤣
Really true and on point video! Thank you so much for making these videos courtney
Courtney, the core issue in dating comes down to women NOT taking responsibility of their actions, while simultaneously expecting men to treat them like princesses and expecting to have all kinds of privileges.
Great video Courtney
I can say as a man this is all so true. I had a bumble for a few weeks and did not get one ,watch and also paid for the premium thing. Today as a man you can never admit weakness but I’ll be humble with you and anyone reading this that modern dating has completely destroyed my self worth
Match* not watch
@@davidcolwill1773 try not to judge yourself on the validation given by others. Do you like yourself? Good! Because you will be the ONLY person with you every day for the rest of your life. Ironically, the happier you are with yourself, the less others will matter, and the more they will want to be part of that happy life. Sending good vibes over the internetz. Hope that helps.
Cheers!
Level up! Great advice. We most certainly can all use self care, self development, self discovery, self discipline, self awareness in our lives. Learn, grow, change, improvement yourself...for yourself! If that benefits someone else in the future, great! Really do it for you, and it will come back to you in many ways.
👏🏼❤️ spot on!
Good video Courtney Ryan, I just found your channel on my feed. I have seen many FreshandFit, Kievin Samuals, Roommates and many other channels about the issue of dating in the current era. I don't think social media is totally to blame, I think its America consumerism that has been ingrained in our culture for generations. We like to push for individualism and show off success. Social media is now a perfect platform where anyone can do this now. What social media is doing now is showing what we knew for decades about America culture.
I actually stepped away from dating and had for a while until 2018. In 2018 the company I used to work for I had sent me to the Philippines for 5 months and during that time I met a great young lady at a park in Manila. From there we connected and main reason is we both like living simple. Lot of Filipinos like living simple even if they have money. They don't show off like how we do in America. As of today we have a daughter together and connection feels stronger.
Some ladies I knew back in college that had rejected me tried very hard to shame me for meeting a Filipino woman. I said back to them on social media that "your shame is a way to cover your own misery because of your ridiculous standards and you getting older and not yet married". Never I heard they shame me again and never heard them spoke to me ever again.
I definitely like to hear the woman's point of view and what they find problematic with dating
This is one of your best videos in awhile, Courtney. Great insight!
This came off as a "women have unrealistic expectations, and I'm one of them. I just happened to have met a man on tinder and he is making money too. Most of the women I know do not date men that make less than they do. But! You as a man, have to level up to match our unrealistic expectations" video. XD lol!
This is what's totally wrong with social dating, and Courtney Ryan is an example of it. Remember, in her trail, and in every woman's, there's a trail of good hard working men that were ignores by them and rejected towards their journey to a 20% male. It's disgusting and sad really.
Courtney you truly are a gem. The way you carry yourself is Yin it's full concept. Your character mannerisms and personality quirks embrace feminine energy to a T but you know when to tap into that little yang (masculine) energy when it's necessary to address your advice and input on a situation.
I say all us average and ugly men should leave all dating apps. Tinder, pof, match, etc. Let the top fight it out with each other.
I stopped using tinder for a while. Part of me gave up on apps since I accepted that I'm not on the same level as most girls on tinder. They're usually baddies or average girls with high standards.
Relationships just isnt made for us...
@@danielgilazar4088 I never even bothered with Tinder. I used match, pof, and okcupid to no avail.
@@大星星16 that's what it's starting to feel like
@@Dekkard5 i tried all of them to "increase" my chances. But nothing worked,
Well said Courtney. Your viewpoints are refreshing and your channel puts hope back into play. Keep it up
People claim they want to look for a good person but they aren't good person themselves. Goes for both genders.
I really like this message ...Thank You for keeping it real!!! Bravo
Online dating today feels like trying to buy/sell a used car lol. So many people think they’re a Mercedes, but in actuality they’re a high mileage Toyota. Just be real, nothing wrong with a 200,000 mile Honda, with some chipped paint lol
I think too that what this boils down to is a lack of control men believe they're in when in the dating scene. Just know that you need not surrender your time, heart, or mind to anyone. Don't feel that you have to change your nature or compromise yourself. You'll find the right woman, who may not be what you expect, but she'll be right.
Thanks Courtney, looking forward to next vid 🙂
There's a vid for you. Set up a dating profile for each of you and Teddy for a week, run them and see the results on each account at the end of the week. See how a high value man and high value woman compare.
Your videos are alway so relaxing and hepful!
People don’t adjust their standards to who they are;
This applies to what they can offer
Traditional vs non-traditional
Courtney strikes me as pretty traditional so she can ask for a traditional man.Lana Rhodes/IG thots can not.
Also with Kevin Samuels,the amount of below average women who want a 200k man is astounding.Nobody thinks they are average anymore.
👏🏼
Why would any woman think she is average when Tess Holiday is seen as beautiful and has more orbiters than Jupiter? Come on men would be no different if the average basement dwelling video gamer who has mom feed hot pockets through a mail box slot every 4 hours had a bunch of women blowing up his phone with texts like "daddy I need you right now" He would think he is a stud too. Men are a good part of the problem. Have some damn self respect and stop chasing women with zero to offer.
This woman lives in Los Angeles. Of course hypergamy is going to be on steroids. She literally was dating a man with 10+ children from 10+ different women. This woman will settle for nothing less than an 8 even when she is 40. She is signing up to be a perma plate.
@@polishpimp4233 The most abundant resource in the planet Earth is weak and thirsty men. They are the reason things suck this much.
@@FGj-xj7rd I agree. The problem would end tomorrow if men became as selective as women. It is a market problem.
The leveling up mantra is a good advice with good intention. However, personally i feel like even if i level up. Its not going to be enough. Im only human with flaws that statistically makes me undesireable in a human system that works against me. I have made peace that i might be dying alone on this earth without knowing the love of a soulmate and thats ok. I wish my fellow good brothers out there in the dating world nothing but the best. You guys are kings
Courtney's facial reactions are gold 🤣
Do you think you have a chance with a girl like her? Keep dreaming.
I appreciate your warm, honest, up-front, patient, and respectful approach. You seem wise beyond your years; please keep up the material; I'm sure many men appreciate your service. Since this video are about issues men deal with in the dating field, what are the issues that women have to deal with, and what can we men do to minimize our part in those pressures?