Lily Allen: Children "Ruined My Career" | The View
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- Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024
- After the singer spoke out saying "you can't have it all," #TheView co-hosts weigh in on women sacrificing their career for motherhood. abcn.ws/2RiH3wd
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This is why Adele, reluctantly, agreed to the Vegas residency. She wanted stability while still being a huge pop star.
Something like a Vegas residency is a great opportunity for a pop star: you're not schlepping all over the globe, you return to the same home every day at the same time, etc. But very few pop stars have the drawing power of someone like Adele, where they'll have that option.
I thought Adele did Vegas because she hates touring?
@@HoennMaster Because touring is too disruptive.
She said that her son kept her from dropping an album every year or every other year. She doesn't have many albums. She prioritizes her family she has said it many times
Celine and Britney were very open about that aspect of that chapter of their life's. Now there is a plethora of artists doing the same and its awesome.
Gosh, they really misquoted Lily here. She said, "My kids ruined my career," as a joke. THEN, right afterwards, she said that her parents weren't around and that it scarred her and that she didn't want to do the same to her children. she even said that some people put their career before children but that it wasn't the choice for her. By looking at the title of this clip, they make it seem like Lily said the opposite and didn't want to be a Mother. How unprofessional! I don't think the person watched the interview, they just saw clips and assumed they knew how the interview went and just threw up the title!
Be careful…there’s a big difference between choosing a pop career vs a mom that has to work for financial reasons..don’t shame those women who seriously don’t have a choice
A career is a career.
One thing about the latter is the mom who has to work for financial reasons may not necessarily be doing the job she would prefer if that wasn’t the case. So even then there’s some sacrifice.
Absolutely!
She didn’t shame anybody she told her truth
@@justintaylor3081Good point.
It's also okay to not have children at all.
Is it also ok to murder babies because you’re too irresponsible and narcissistic to care for anyone other than yourself?
Absolutely and I agree with you, but that is not what they are discussing.
@@Deisi666 oh she knows, she just wanted everyone to know she supports murdering babies because that makes her a “strong woman”
Yes, but thats not the topic. The topic is, for people who have children and want children.
This! Im glad single and child free is becoming a thing
I love what you said Sunny..”My career may have suffered, but my children did not”.. Well put..
I volunteered as a hospice companion for almost 10 years. And at the end of life, no one EVER has said they regret not working more or sacrificing their career. The only thing that was consistent from those patients were that: Family and their partner mattered the most, that their life had meaning, and that they’ll be remembered for how they made people feel. And I actually brought my baby to meet one of those patients. And as she held him, she looked up at me and said, “THIS is the most important job you will ever have.” I retired from my career shortly after, and have felt complete peace about it ever since. Because they all taught me what matters most in the end. And it certainly is not a career.❤
How can you regret not having what you never had?
@@pb.j.1753 Because as human beings we are always evolving, and the things we tend to place importance on changes as we get older.
Great point, at the end of life, you want/need family. Earlier in life you have bills to pay, food, clothing, mortgage. A smaller sacrifice in childcare to allow for career progression allows more ease to access the essentials in life. Also, in quiet moments in a hospice, one may reflect poor business decisions or "what ifs" that include potential different careers. " What if I wrote that book..." it's possible
@@ladiorange Well said 🩷
This is so true. I have always had elder friends….don’t know why. But all of them told me this two. Some of them are gone now… ❤
It depends on what your career is and what your support is. Some women can have it all at the same time, but for some careers, it's more difficult. Everyone's story is different.
"Have it all" - what a joke. Did you not listen to what Lily said?
Yes, if women have support systems and husbands or other people who take care of the children equally, they can have time to spend on their career and life goes to. The problem is women expected to do all the childcare and men expected to do none of it. Then she has to sacrifice her career, but if they take Childcare equally or woman had support from friends and family she could still have a career.
@@dorino9057 Yes that is so true, especially the words in the middle of your comment 👍
Few but even with a support system it looks different like Beyoncé 16 carriages is about her struggles to balance and she has a team. But mom guilt is real.
That’s what feminism wants you to believe…unfortunately this isn’t true for most especially when you aren’t rich.
I'm lucky that my dad was able to help my mom a lot. So when she had to work late as a secretary, he was home with my brother and I in our formative years. They worked as a team.
@thelifeofariawhats missing now? Men r more involved with the kids more than ever and sahm r lowest it has ever been and birth rates were much higher in the past.Birth rates r lower cuz it’s become more expensive and people have become less religious.Religion promotes having a family which is y religious countries have higher birth rates
That's the way it should be 👍
I bet Trump will never come close to your parent
Your dad didn’t ‘help’ your mom, he did his job as a dad. Many men just don’t look after their kids and leave all the burden to women.
@@claudiacastro2709 Can't argue with that.
I knew I never wanted to be a SAHM and I don't trust men to be 100% fully invested in their children's lives, so I decided to not marry and not have kids. I'm 44 and I know it was the right choice for ME.
sad.
I’m sure right now it’s fine. But when you’re 70 and retired it may not be enjoyable. What people in the latter part of life crave is companionship. Wether that be from a partner or from children and grand children. It’s not fun being alone when you’re old
yikes... good luck girl.
@@jsilva7005this is indeed what my mom always tells me
@@jsilva7005they crave companionship because they became dependent
Timing is different for all women and circumstances right
Beyonce turned out all right..
@@fpshooterful yea if I had Mama Tina I would be alright too. LOL I love her Mom!
@@fpshooterful How do you know that? The only thing we have seen from her private life is her sister hitting her husband.
@@fpshooterful Yeah well, Beyonce can afford to have people take care of her kids so she didn't need to give up anything.
@@idotgotitme3280 I mean.... Lilly Allen still made money. Otherwise she wouldn't be able to afford to just concentrate on her kids. There is a reason why she can do that, and you know... not work. She has at least that entertainment money. Affording a nanny or not.
Whoopi is looking stunning. Sometimes she's annoying, but boy is she beautiful lately. She's almost 70!
She is very unhealthy though 😢
Well; except the annoying part...not annoying to me
😊
@@MissusChanandlerBonghow do you know shes unhealthy?
@@dollyrawlins5470 She's super overweight and has lots of health issues.
Black don’t crack❤
Did people in the comments insulting Allen even watch the video? She said it ruined her career but that she is glad that she chose to focus on her kids over her career. Being a pop star is probably different from most other careers in that, if you're lucky enough find the kind of career momentum that she had, then you can't just stop touring and releasing new music for years and expect to come back to it. Even singers that are solely focused on their careers have a hard time staying successful and relevant.
👏👏 exactly.
Life is always about making choices. People often just don't want to recognize that so choices are made for them.
This is why you think long and hard before having kids.
Every situation is different. I personally watched my career go swoosh down the toilet when I had my daughter 24 years ago. BUT I chose to stay home with my daughter and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. We lived in a trailer for the first 6 years of my daughter’s life so that I could stay at home and raise her. I do not regret it at all. She has turned out to be a pretty good person. Every family has to decide what is best for them though. Sometimes women can’t just stay home and so things have to be figured out, but I cannot judge other women’s decisions. We all have to navigate our own paths.
Children need involved parents. My father was a doctor and my mother for the most partied all the time. My siblings and I pretty much raised ourselves. If you don't want to raise children, don't have them. If you do have them and aren't involved, you are selfish.
Vastly depends on the career.
Wait, but Men DO have to ask this same question. Rather sexist to assume that fathers as part of being career driven to provide for family haven’t been making sacrifices for generations knowing whether he’s a Doctor or truck driver? Being a bit absentee, on the road or away from kids unable to make it to every soccer game or recital? That IS a painful sacrifice millions of Men have made with awareness for the consequential impact of their choices.
Thank you, Joy. the most sensible thing said on this subject. "Do you think me are asking themselves this question?"
thanks feminist
What exactly is sensible about that?
It's not a fair question because it frames men/fathers as less dedicated and that's not always true
I thought it was an archaic question. Good people love their children and re-evaluate their priorities regardless of gender. There are plenty of men who wish they would have spent more time at home than at the office. Stay-at-home/single-parent dads most definitely asked themselves that question.
Men lives are not affected by children. Women are the ones who sacrifice and lives are changed stop acting like that’s not the case. Men don’t care just like it’s easy for them to make these laws about abortion. Not their problem until their mistress gets pregnant.
Times are different now. I hate that my mother had to sacrifice her career for us. I wished she pursued her dreams. It made us stronger and independent.
Appreciate her being honest. A lot of parents feel this but admitting this would shade you badly. We’re all human & have dreams. One truth is when you start a family, you have to hault a lot of dreams. Think that is why that 1 line in the Barbie film hits home. A lot of single mother homes they are stretched thin.
Everyone makes choices when it comes to how they will raise their family and she made hers😊
I'm loving this new hairstyle Whoopi's been rocking these last few months
Same!
Cashier at my local Tescos is a white lady c.60 y.o. and has tats too on the shaved bits. You do you girl.
Sometimes it's not a 'career' it's a job and a necessity so that they can provide food, housing, clothes etc. Both my parents *had* to work but one was always home with us (one worked during the day, the other at night).
This is exactly why I don’t have children and never will . But at least no child in this world can say they have been damaged because of what I decided to do and for me that’s a big accomplishment
Sheezus was amazing. She’s been singing about this struggle for about a decade. I feel for her
Yes it was!! So underrated.
No you can’t have it all I wish more women would actually admit this
My mother sacrificed her dreams when she become a military spouse and mother to myself and my two older sisters, while managing our family as we moved every 3-5 years. Military spouses are a special breed.
There aren’t always good ones though - on base military living can be toxic, so many military wives are just t o x i c
Let's be real, the military itself is fucking toxic @@basicallyno1722
Yep, I know all about sacrificing dreams without being a military wife 😭
Love Lily Allen! Ready for a comeback album ❤
In Skandinaviska countrys They have one year maternity leave which you get paid.
I don’t know about that but in Sweden you can stay up to one and half years if you take payment 5 days a week instead 7 days a week.
Yes in Slovakia 9 months after birth, woman gets paid 75% of her salary before giving birth and then can stay home up to 3 years with less % but not sure about the number
Her daughter said earlier that she spent a lot of time wuth her grandmother in her early years. I think people have to be real and honest about choices you make. Doesn't make you a bad person.
But I remember back in the early 2010’s when she decided to retire because she was tired of the industry and wanted to settle with a family and bringing kids up, it’s all choices you make but I’m sure her kids appreciate her being present that’s the most important thing.
This is exactly why I don’t have kids. I’m not ready to sacrifice that kind of thing.
Amen. Same here
Some people just shouldn't have kids. If you're not mature or responsible enough, or are too self-centered, parenting is probably not for you.
Ali Wong says the reason why she can do it all is because of her nanny
and her mom and her children's other grandma and her ex-husband who still works and tours with her and the kids, it takes a village
Her children didn't do that her choices did that. No one has it all at anything. And yes, the majority of the parents in the world can not afford to stay home and prioritize children. So that sound so entitle and playing martyr complex
You can't have it all!! Ladies, It's great to be home! I have no regrets! Degrees and all! Sunny is full of it! You can't afford to stay home witha Dr. Husband? Really??
Always loved Lily! There’s no normal childhood, everyone is different.
Joy always looks so good
I love Joyce. She's ❤so rational and factual. Great job, Joy. Comedy & commonsense
Some people aren't capable of managing children and a career to a level that makes them happy and some people are and it's ok. It all depends on circumstances, timing and who you are as a person. There's no point trying to force yourself to do something that you don't want to do because you think it's a failure if you can't manage it all.
@@joehigashi3584trump derangement syndrome
These women think talking for an hour on the View everyday for millions of dollars is a Career that everyday people can relate with.
Most people can't afford to be home. We don't have a choice
My mother had no career and was a stay at home mom. Many women in her era(70s) were homemakers.
She was abusive to my father and all her children . I think she never wanted to have a family as her career. She was definitely jealous of my father because he had a career. The same goes for her children when they got careers .
She always resented that her daughters were educated and pursued careers.
I forgot all about Lily Allen, use to love her music in my very early 20's!!
It depends on the career and timing. When a musician has a hit single or record, you usually have to work hard to promote and tour while you’re being recognized. This is hard to do and raise youngsters if you want to be present in their lives. If you miss that opportunity to grow a music career you can sustain, there isn’t much chance you’re going to get it back in the over saturated music world.
Sunny: “I stayed with my kids less than a year.”
“I know what’s best for your kids”
Kids are number priority, period. My ex and I weren't on the same page so I had to give up on mine to look after the kids. I have zero regrets today. If you think you'll have regrets then that is an indication you aren't cut to be a parent.
I adore Lily and miss her music
Ladies, please stop saying what men will and will not do. I am a father who carried my children almost everywhere I went. I attended all their events and was a positive force in their lives. Please stop with the generalizations. Oh and by the way, and I do the same for my granddaughter.
You are an exceptional man!
Good for you 👍 it's too bad that it's not the norm in most cases 😔
As usual, Lily is right on. You cannot have it all. It's not possible.
"Do you think men are asking themselves this question?" So they don't think there's no single fathers out there? Or men that choose to work closer to home so they can be closer to their kids? Men make lots of sacrifices. Both parents do. That was a pretty ignorant thing to say.
More power to single moms. They have to do it all!
Love her forever. She's honest
Parents to be should really consider this before having kids. Because those kids didn't ask to be born, but parents only have one chance to raise them regardless of your career.
I loved what Whoopi, Sunny, Sara, and Joy said in this segment
But they are all unsaved, only that 1 lady is saved aka xtian
Lilly said she wasn’t strategic with her career so that explains why her music career dropped. There are many female artists still successful who have kids. Let’s be real here, we’re not living in 1920s. Women can have a career and children. It’s hard but it’s possible.
NOT EVERIYBODY HAS THE SAME SKILLS.
And we accept it in ourselves and in others.
I love Whoopi's honesty but yeah she's an incredible mom and it's clear because they are so close to this day
Christina Aguilera has successfully continued to balance being the amazing artist she is while being a mother of two! 👸🏼
Yeah well she also can afford to have people take care of the kids so she didn't have to give up everything.
Is the same Lily Allen mad because BEYONCE did a country album?! Petty Lily needs to grow up. Is there anything she doesn’t complain about?
I sacrificed my career, but I’ve managed to claw it back. I’ve brought my son up alone, so it can be done.
You can't have it all. Men or women or anyone cannot have it all at the same time. That is why there are priorities
I'm a guy I have put career over marriage and kids. I have basically accepted never having kids. My career which is in film and tv is more important to me than my personal life needs.
What you don’t have you don’t miss.....
I’m not having children and I’m perfectly okay with it! Most of my friends don’t have children either 🤷♂️
That's good. Glad you was real about your choices.
Very common for gay men, and other people who need to 'fit in' to the current zeitgeist of corporate/gov't industry pressure to put careers over marriage and kids, especially in TV/Film/The Arts.
It doesn't necessarily mean that you can't change your mind IF you reach a certain fulfillment in your career.....
0:01
FINALLY A FEMALE WHO SPEAKS ON IT👌🏻💞
Everyone does not have the options. I have 3 sons, did not get child support. I could not get family to watch my sons early morning until late evening for 2 weeks so I could go out of state 2 hr. drive 10 hr. a day. I could not afford to pay anyone else. So I had to turn down a manager career, and take a job for $9.50 an hr. local to be there for my sons and I had a home to pay for. At times I had 2 jobs. All women have different issues, that is why we have to stand by each others choices.
Nobody can have it all, both men not women, we're just used to fathers neglect when it comes to a child care.
In order to suceed in one you'll have to make sacrifices here and there the key is balance.
No, they didn’t. I didn’t know who she was to begin with. Lol don’t blame that on the kids not their fault.
She was actually a popular singer in the late 00’s-early 10s and apart of the class of new "British Invasion" female singers that included Amy Winehouse, Adele, Duffy, Natasha Bedingfield, Leona Lewis, etc. so she was a rising star in the States (her debut went gold here) and she had true pop star success in the UK. I don’t think she would’ve reached bonafide international success, but the long breaks between albums to tend to her family definitely effected her career.
I really miss her music.
Parents need to make the choice! Children are a blessing.
Didn't she say she was overwhelmed by suffering a miscarriage in 2008 and what an incredibly unlucky thing it was to happen? I know what she means but saying the children ruined her career was a choice of words.
Right. I feel putting the onus on her kids instead of taking ownership of her choices is weird. Children have no say whatsoever. She made the choice to have kids and used her childhood scars to guide her to a decision she could live with. Nothing wrong with that but stop blaming the kids.
And this is why American's get a rep for not getting the Brit sense of humour. She was joking when she said they ruined her career!
@@raindrops21_9… 🙄nobody cares about her little joke. Most intelligent ppl understand there is some truth in every punchline and throughout her entire statement she was not taking ownership of her actions.
FYI… that wasn’t “brit humor.” Americans make jokes like that all the time.
@@rainbeauxunicorn5237 Come on now you do not know exactly how she feels about stopping her career from that short clip. You are assuming a lot by not taking her by her word. How do we know that maybe even before she got pregnant her whole plan was to quit her career and concentrate on her children. You are judging her without knowing the whole story.
@@richardlug6139… 😒 apparently you need to rewatch the clip.
You can have it all? Not in the real world! Let's wakeup and smell the coffee.
Isn't the question whether it's better to have a parent available, not whether a woman can have it all?
Mothers/Women have to be the ones to make that choice. Not much is expected from men!!! When men stay with their kids; best dad ever!!! When women do it; "oh, okay. She's just doing what's best!"
I don't think we can ALL have it all. I'm glad others were able to find some balance, but it's clear Lily was not. She had a very heavy touring / late night talk show schedule and was often travelling internationally most of her career.
You have to define why you need to work is it really financial or for the finer things in life . Priorities.
The US still doesn’t have proper maternity leave.
The blonde woman was so well spoken in her perspective
You can’t do it all at the same time
they are not supposed to like everything do. pure gold. Shes so right. Let adults make adult decisions because when opportunities come knocking you have to be ready.
It’s way different to at least be, with your kid like Whoopie said, but Lilly Allen chose a stable home life for young babies I’m assuming and that’s probably better in the long grin at least until your middle school age
That is why it is not weird that more and more woman do not want any kids at all..And i think that is their (wise) choice.
Judgy comment section, this is why people don’t even bother to speak on their personal experiences
It’s called ‘The View’!
Why are you judging the people that make judgy comments, though? That’s a bit hypocritical, don’t ya think?
Men rarely have to make those decisions
If you're a parent and your children ruined your career, you're doing GREAT!
This is a very powerful segment really great job everyone
If you have money it can be done............
Whoopi was 17 when she had her daughter- I totally get why she chose her career!!!
Men ARE asking themselves this question! It’s crazy how anti-father this show can be.
If they can afford to ask themselves those questions. There is a great deal of good men who don't ask these questions, just do what's best for their kids.
And I think it's despicable to paint men always as the enemies. But hey, that's "The View" for ya.
Whatever your choice....how a child is raised is 100% on the parent. It is their job to navigate the education and rearing of a child. Period. Yes, it helps when you have people, school, etc. BUT it is ultimately the parents responsibility.
I was wondering why Lily Allen disappeared from the music scene
I don't think you should ever say that , because they aren't what should destroy or ruin anything , clearly there are outside parties they interact with and it can't be just them
Wanna bet 😊
I imagine being on the road touring for a year at a time must be very difficult decision. Do you leave your kids at home or take them on the road. Once they're school age are they better off staying home in school with their friends. If she chose to stay home with them instead of touring of course that would hurt her career.
I love Sunny's response. I also got more clarity on Whoopi's. The fact that she brought her daughter with her speaks volumes. The caption makes it seem like she just dumped her daughter wherever and left her. I don't have kids so I get that once kids come it takes balance. No matter what profession, kids grow up and remember if they were given love and stability. We always remember.
It's OK to not have children or a career.
As an American I don't know much about Lily Allen.
But based on what I do know, I think her level of talent is more to blame than her children🙄
Fame and success is not a right. She should consider herself lucky that she got her 15minutes.
Her and her rich husband are doing just fine.
Thank you, for your platform.
"The View" "Topic of Interest"
I love her song with Common drivin’ me wild 😊
love lily but i had to start work at my corporate job when my kid was 2
I got out of the Army when I was 7 months pregnant. I completed the summer session, started the far semester, took three weeks off after a C-section, and went back to school. I also nursed him for almost 2 years, made all his baby food, and prioritized my time with him while maintaining an average good enough to get into my masters course. I kicked my ex-husband out when I caught him shaking our son when he was 6 months old. Because I was on the GI Bill for school, I couldn't miss a semester. But it really didn't matter. I'm unable to stay home with a child. It's just not something I'm capable of doing.
Why 2 years? Isn’t that too much nursing?