would have appreciated, if you had shown up front your PESONAL STATEMENT, or if it's okay please show us it out in the next video, i need to see the whole structure of your P.S so that I can a vivid idea as I go about writing my own.
Hi. Thank you for your feedback. I have read the statement almost entirely out loud in this video. You’ll see that if you watch the entire video. Thank you so much :)
@@theglamscholar I am having big trouble with starting line, would you suggest any tips, on how to write those first lines, and in particularly the first line.
@@ghaxaans hmm….like I said in the video the starting line should be something that sets the tone for the rest of your personal statement….I wouldn’t worry too much about how to start if you haven’t written the rest of the statement first. Just put all your thoughts on paper first. If you’ve done this most often the starting line presents itself. If not I’d suggest leading with something that is personal to you and fits for the course you are applying to. For me, I started with talking about a lesson I learned from my policy studies course in the first year and the quote from Robert Dilts because it talks about a pluralistic perspective. The course I was applying to was multi-faceted, and so was my previous education. This is why I introduced the idea of ‘wicked problems’ and used that specific quote from Robert Dilts. I hope this answers your question. Goodluck with writing and your application!
@@theglamscholar this may sound odd, but trust me if it wasn't this important I wouldn't bother you. Please if possible go through my P.S and please 🙏 please, help me refine it. "From a young age, I have been passionated about technology. Witnessing the shift from keypads to touchscreen phones captivated my interest. I clearly recall the day my secondhand computer suddenly went dark. Unsure of what had gone wrong, I decided to investigate and found that simply changing the RAM port revived the screen. The outside world was rapidly changing with each new innovation, yet inside my school, we learned programming on a whiteboard. Frustrated by this, I sought opportunities beyond the classroom and soon enrolled in a software course, marking my first experience with programming. It didn’t take long for me to develop my first app, aimed at children, featuring a very basic and dull interface-it was created using Scratch. Nevertheless, I believe this sparked a flame within me, which I consider the pivotal moment in my life, as it became my driving force. Like many others, I was excited about the day we would have to choose between two paths: the pre-medical route or the pre-engineering route. Just a week before that decision, my mother had been discharged from Aga Khan University Hospital in perfect health. The treatment she received during her stay left such a profound impact on her that she expressed a heartfelt wish-she wanted to see me help countless other mothers in the same way she had been helped. That moment changed everything for me. Her words resonated deeply, shaping my decision to pursue the pre-medical path. My fascination with machines remained strong, and it intensified as I read Geoffrey Hinton's groundbreaking work on Neural Networks, where he discussed the concept of machines learning from data in a way similar to how humans learn. This interest was more than just an academic curiosity-it felt like a revolution. I saw parallels between his relentless pursuit of innovation and my own journey, driven by an insatiable curiosity and a steadfast desire to succeed. This connection led me to choose math as an additional subject alongside pre-medical courses in my first year of college, trusting my instincts and finding inspiration in Hinton's achievements as I navigated my path forward. At this intersection of medicine and technology, I seek a learning environment that fosters interdisciplinary thinking. LUMS’ Data Science program provides the perfect platform to refine my analytical skills while deepening my understanding of data-driven solutions with its rigorous curriculum and research opportunities, I am confident that LUMS will equip me with the knowledge and tools necessary to make meaningful contributions.
Much needed 😊😊
Thank you
Sweet of you! Thanks a lot❤️
This came at the right time! Let me get on my zoom.
Get on your zoom girl! Goodluck with your application. You’ll kill it!❤️❤️
So informative 😊 and you look good😍
Thank youuu🥹🥰🥰
would have appreciated, if you had shown up front your PESONAL STATEMENT, or if it's okay please show us it out in the next video, i need to see the whole structure of your P.S so that I can a vivid idea as I go about writing my own.
Hi. Thank you for your feedback. I have read the statement almost entirely out loud in this video. You’ll see that if you watch the entire video. Thank you so much :)
@@theglamscholar I am having big trouble with starting line, would you suggest any tips, on how to write those first lines, and in particularly the first line.
@@ghaxaans hmm….like I said in the video the starting line should be something that sets the tone for the rest of your personal statement….I wouldn’t worry too much about how to start if you haven’t written the rest of the statement first. Just put all your thoughts on paper first. If you’ve done this most often the starting line presents itself. If not I’d suggest leading with something that is personal to you and fits for the course you are applying to. For me, I started with talking about a lesson I learned from my policy studies course in the first year and the quote from Robert Dilts because it talks about a pluralistic perspective. The course I was applying to was multi-faceted, and so was my previous education. This is why I introduced the idea of ‘wicked problems’ and used that specific quote from Robert Dilts. I hope this answers your question. Goodluck with writing and your application!
@@theglamscholar appreciated 👍
@@theglamscholar this may sound odd, but trust me if it wasn't this important I wouldn't bother you.
Please if possible go through my P.S and please 🙏 please, help me refine it.
"From a young age, I have been passionated about technology. Witnessing the shift from keypads to touchscreen phones captivated my interest. I clearly recall the day my secondhand computer suddenly went dark. Unsure of what had gone wrong, I decided to investigate and found that simply changing the RAM port revived the screen. The outside world was rapidly changing with each new innovation, yet inside my school, we learned programming on a whiteboard. Frustrated by this, I sought opportunities beyond the classroom and soon enrolled in a software course, marking my first experience with programming. It didn’t take long for me to develop my first app, aimed at children, featuring a very basic and dull interface-it was created using Scratch. Nevertheless, I believe this sparked a flame within me, which I consider the pivotal moment in my life, as it became my driving force.
Like many others, I was excited about the day we would have to choose between two paths: the pre-medical route or the pre-engineering route. Just a week before that decision, my mother had been discharged from Aga Khan University Hospital in perfect health. The treatment she received during her stay left such a profound impact on her that she expressed a heartfelt wish-she wanted to see me help countless other mothers in the same way she had been helped. That moment changed everything for me. Her words resonated deeply, shaping my decision to pursue the pre-medical path.
My fascination with machines remained strong, and it intensified as I read Geoffrey Hinton's groundbreaking work on Neural Networks, where he discussed the concept of machines learning from data in a way similar to how humans learn. This interest was more than just an academic curiosity-it felt like a revolution. I saw parallels between his relentless pursuit of innovation and my own journey, driven by an insatiable curiosity and a steadfast desire to succeed. This connection led me to choose math as an additional subject alongside pre-medical courses in my first year of college, trusting my instincts and finding inspiration in Hinton's achievements as I navigated my path forward.
At this intersection of medicine and technology, I seek a learning environment that fosters interdisciplinary thinking. LUMS’ Data Science program provides the perfect platform to refine my analytical skills while deepening my understanding of data-driven solutions with its rigorous curriculum and research opportunities, I am confident that LUMS will equip me with the knowledge and tools necessary to make meaningful contributions.
What are your personal statement hacks?