The Secret Power of Missing Someone
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- Опубликовано: 12 июн 2024
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“Missing someone that we’re close to - because they’ve had to go to another country, or are up in the north on a course, or went on a hiking trip with their friends - is such an unpleasant emotion, it feels peculiar to suggest that it is also, at a profound level, an extraordinary achievement and an important marker of emotional maturity. It is in no way simple for a prototypical adult to be able to miss anyone and we are often, almost without knowing it, engaged in complex manoeuvres to ensure that we resolutely won’t…”
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CREDITS
Produced in collaboration with:
Nicky Francis
www.nicolajanefrancis.com/
Title animation produced in collaboration with
Graeme Probert
www.gpmotion.co.uk
relationships,love,emotional maturity,vulnerability,connection,attachment theory,communication,self-reflection,personal growth,psychology,missing someone,long distance relationships,coping with absence,healthy relationships,emotional intelligence,emotional baggage,fear of intimacy,letting go,heartbreak,self-love,how to deal with missing someone,the importance of missing someone,the fear of missing someone,loss,lonely,power,friendships,social interaction,how to
Quote for a lifetime: "Romanticizing and missing a relationship that previously emotionally destroyed you is a trauma response, not love."
Trauma response? How?
@@ML-jd5hz Because if that relationship emotionally destroyed you it was not love; it was a trauma bond. I think there is a video here on the School of Life about trauma if you wish to check it out. There are also videos on the avoidant and anxious attachment relationship styles, which also feature trauma.
Here's hoping you're healthy. 🤗
@@rainbowgirljules Why trauma bond is bad?
@@3ngan498 Makes you think getting hurt by those you love is normal/expected because one can't accept/won't accept that the other person is not so good for us.
Damn... I needed to hear that.
At this point I'm convinced the school of life is spying on me... I don't mind.
I Had this feeling already a long time ago, you just described it for me. Kind of they posted exactly what I needed at exactly the moment I needed it. Greetings
Seriously. Happened 2 hours ago and they posted the vid an hour later
It’s a Sign of God. This video appears in a complicate situation in my life. Now the work is to take this knowledge and acts in a good way in consequence.
Same
or is it a sign that we, despite all our different circumstances, are despairing in similar problems presented to us by life
people avoid deep emotional intimacy out of a fear of being abandoned or rejected. Instead, they long for emotional closeness and acceptance, without being perceived as selfish or narcissistic. This fear-based mindset prevents them from fully expressing their need for love, as they struggle to understand how to cultivate meaningful connections…
You cannot build any kind of "relationship" with a society that has been groomed to ignore the legitimate meanings of true connection, comraderie, love, intimacy, etc. In other words, you're not going to find many gems amongst endless deserts of sand (if any). This is just reality, and it's been that way for a very, very long time.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
frick are you spying on me?!
Bingo, you just said it!!! Thank you!! Thank you!!! The problem of the world that think its rights, ur right, their wrong and its always been like that
Hard to tell when you miss someone, or you miss your projection of them. Just remember, if someone shows you they don’t care, believe them
Sometimes people just don't say they miss someone tho. Better to ask them first rather than inventing the answer in your head.
I miss so many people over my life,
Friends who died, friends who moved on, friends I hurt, friends who hurt me.
One day I hope I become at peace with that.
Reflection is truly key and lock. Consider this even more closely when your 12th hour arrives.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
I wish you that
Are you a cancer or a scorpio
I'm at the position like you😶🌫️
This one really hit home. My daughter had recently had meltdowns when I have had to leave the house. Her dad did exactly what this video said and now she brings up to me that she didn't cry. I have told her how proud I was of her and what seems to me now, encouraged her stuffing her feelings. I think it is a powerful thing to be able to express your feelings and not be told to do it a different way. I will work harder at validating how my children feel so they grow up understanding themselves instead of working so hard to in their 30s like myself.
This vid is so on point…. It’s a strange feeling to miss someone who emotionally and mentally destroyed you. It’s like a betrayal of one’s self.
Your own ethics and beliefs are not a reflection of theirs. Just because others do not care about you doesn't mean that you should automatically dismiss what your own system of beliefs and feelings are all about. Becoming "someone else" isn't necessarily a good idea, either.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
@@Novastar.SaberCombat
Or the maturity to not go for revenge when they disappoint you; or hold back on being hurtful in return, just because they were hurtful to you
Well said!
Yes, I totally agree. Never go as low as the person who hurt you. If you do the same, you become like them. So just have your dignity, and be mature. That really helped me to deal with my narcissistic ex with some undiagnosed mental disorder that I guess, everyone except for him, has noticed.
same
I have that deep urge to revenge in some way, but not as bad as he hurt me. I just feel so betrayed. My scar will be on me forever, whereas whatever I intend to revenge him with is barely a scratch.
After endless heartbreaks and broken attachment styles, I've finally reached a point in life where I romantically crave someone. Missing her brings me so much peace.
Wish me luck, guys. School of Life's teachings are finally channeling out well in my life!
🔥🔥🔥🙏
@TheSoundofTanay I miss her, can't deny that but given my circumstances I can't afford to be missing her as the whole process is quite draining and I really can't afford being unproductive.
And I understand I'm looking at an emotional subject through an analytical lens , to the point that sometimes even I label my feelings as 'fake'..let alone anyone else.. it does allow me to sort of power through this thing.. where I say things like I don't miss her.. I don't miss her.. kinda of trying to make myself believe that that's the case, but over the period of time.. during this entire struggle.. I realised that it can't be fake..I can't deny it.. I miss her and that's the reality..
I was wondering how you do it..?
@@shivamsahu9742 i think when you genuine missing someone, you are missing the good old times you spent together, missing the cares you gave for each other. These memories can make you feel happy again. Also accepting the fact that she left not because she doesn't love you. just don't over analyse and trust what she says, if you both can trust each other. Trust is critical in this case
@@shivamsahu9742 have you tried meditating ? It won’t change the fact that you miss her, but trying to be in the present moment instead of in your thoughts of missing her might help
Also therapy can be a big help
So needed, especially in places where people are praised for being stoic, & where showing emotion is brushed off as "hysterics". If we allowed each other to have more real emotions, we'd all be far healthier. I still recall a former fellow student from my uni days who APOLOGISED for grieving her grandfather. I was, no, don't, it's normal to miss somebody you loved so much. I mean what is grief but missing somebody massively???
Society pushes against grief as if somehow signifies weakness. Nothing could be further from the truth. Weakness is NOT caring. Not engaging. Not becoming invested. But--again--society treasures money over mankind, coin over communities, and salaries over souls. Must give us pause.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Your story remind me of a great quote from the God of War series "To grief deeply is to have love fully". After all, we cannot grief for someone if you had not love them before, so it make sense to me at least.
I'm finishing college in a few days and have been grappling with the grief of losing a lot of my friends since a lot of them are moving back home and it's been hard to deal, so this came at a very appropriate time.
In the 80's and 90's, long-distance communication was extremely difficult. Here in 202x, it's not nearly as rough. Truly legitimate connections will stand strong all the way to the grave. The others... won't. And it's better to know that sooner rather than later. 💪😎✌️
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Same! It hurts to even think about a future where i won't have morning breakfast with them.
I think part 2 of this video is the comment section, take some time to read them and maybe reply with some condolences if you can resonate. Knowing that you’re not alone in feeling the way you’re feeling can be somewhat comforting.
"and we we watch our plans disintegrate with their despair." That's a very nice one.👍
Life is ssooo complicated. 😢 Thank you for being with us.❤
That's what makes life interesting ;)
Imagine seeing it from a dog’s perspective.
I'm on the autism spectrum and find the idea of missing someone just doesn't make sense to me. I've never missed anyone my whole life. I just thought I'd comment for anyone who might have watched the video and be reading the comments and wondering if something is wrong with them, cause they don't get it either. You may be on the spectrum, and that's ok ❤
I'm the same as you. My neurodivergent brain stops me from feeling certain emotions. I'm actually very happy and grateful for this. I see my life being a lot less stressful compared to others because of this.
I’m autistic too I only miss girls I’m interested in, but it’s more like and obsessive thought like I’m in love even if I’ve only met them a month ago. And then when I see potential in another girl it’s like the previous girl never existed
I miss him.
i have to leave the country to go work so my husband and I can save up to move in together in the next year or so. i really needed this, im going to miss him so so SO much. its going to be painful and difficult but i know its for our future
i hope everything goes well for you both ♡
@@what-us5oc thank you, cherishing these last few days together
Its hard not to believe that someone who suddenly & abruptly removes themselves from your life with little to no warning was lying about the kind things they had said about you...
Like "if they were honest about caring about us, why did they essentially ghost us"
Im currently struggling with that situation but im hoping this video's message sinks in 🥃
Just because others lie, cheat, steal, and act without ethics or legitimate emotions doesn't mean that YOU need to become like them. Sure, you CAN... but what good would it truly do you? Life is meaningless without engagement. Existence is futile without the possibility for BOTH failures and successes.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Cuz they’re insane. And don’t live intentionally
Overstood!! I don't get it either. I wonder if they even think of us/you/ said person while ghosting.
@@desireedesenna9673 a lot gets wondered about in that situation...
When i was seven years old, i left my house to go and stay for one night with my uncle and aunt. The next day, when i returned home, my father told me, that my mother had died (she had cancer)
So, as you can understand, i did'nt do well with saying goodby in the rest of my life. I only just now can handle it better..(i'm 47 years old...)
My thoughts are with you. I am not sure how does one ever recover from such an incident.
Thank you❤️
Dealing with mortality early on is actually a powerful lesson. It can cause an individual to truly appreciate just how few hours they (and others) have remaining.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Wow. The fact that they didn't prepare you AT ALL for that scenario says a lot about the level of emotional literacy in your family. Were they English I wonder? I'm not surprised it took you that long to recover.
They were not Englisch :) but dutch farmers..
I would so much rather miss someone not around enough, than be tired of someone around too much.
Both are extremely disturbing and unhealthy
may you feel the wound of missing someone fully without need to self protect❤️
🩷
sincere, honest and vulnerable, that's how love is
Thank you for yet another beautifully done video.
I start to miss my beloved cat, Bella, whenever I can hear the clack of her cat flap as she's on her way outside. My sensitive heart aches until I can hear her clattering back through the flap again! We have a strong bond.
I resonate. I won't elaborate, but there's something to be said for certain types of bonds that stretch beyond the black veil. And whatever memories and visions you hold dearest and strongest during your 12th hour... believe me, they'll be making the journey with you.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Being adopted can take a lifetime to heal from, but then childhood seems to be quite dangerous no matter what the circumstances. Its all downhill after the womb.
I genuinely cannot remember the last time i missed someone, just so disturbingly aloof
Same here....but I am happy with life anyway 😊
That is unfortunate. After all, existence guarantees both the Dark and also the Light. Illusions do not make one or the other truly, legitimately, veritably disappear, though.
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
Thank you, I spent the day yesterday with a friend I connect with who lives a few hours away, I cried so much on the way home, as I dont have someone like that nearer to me (at the moment) more future people to meet ahead. I can feel embarrassed about my inner child given I am an adult.
Even if someone ditches you, there is always ❤ around the corner ^_^ 👍
lies
I Miss Those I Love In Their Absence Very Hard - Because They Mean That Much To Me - That Love Doesn't Go Away Because That Person Has Gone Away.....
edited the comment but still could fix "Your Errors🤡"
I am not sure if i will be able to endure their absence. I miss you, so much. ❤
Another great and insightful message.
At this point, I usually know when I’m self sabotaging, but, this one…this one really got me an taught me. Thank u, Alain🌹
When I was around 5 years old, my father had to spend a week at a time away from us for work until we eventually moved to where he was working.
My mother tells a story in which I am in tears most Mondays in kindergarten because I would tell my teacher that my dad left again.
He was gone so long on an assignment that he grew a full-fledged beard! I didn't even recognize him when I saw him. 🥸
I guess after a while, I got used to missing him. He passed away last month, and this pain of missing him is a lot harder to endure than the others. Every now and again, I think he's just going to reappear. Reappear healthy, happy, and strong. It's truly heartbreaking. 💔
Every circle begins with its end.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
How do I make the most of being in my 30s and living with my parents. I see others in their 30s, getting married (I haven’t dated in years). They are holding down jobs. I fail at that. I have trouble getting along with managers and supervisors (even in a good job). I either quit or get fired. Turns out janitorial and fast food or warehouse jobs are not my forte. Now I’ve learned something.
Take some comfort in the statistical fact that more and more people are experiencing what you are - loneliness, feeling unworthy, chasing an endless array of bad jobs, inability to strike out on your own.
It is closely tied to our current economic system - late stage capitalism. You know, there is a reason why politicians are doing abortion bans and discussing contraception bans right now, it may seem regressive but it is totally logical - young people have stopped procreating. Of course, they stopped because of their inability to get a decent source of income or their own appartment, but in order to salvage that situation, politicians would have to abolish capitalism (which is making them rich), so to avoid hurting their own income and in order to try to supply their children and grandchildren with empoverished workers who they will live off exploiting, they make abortion and contraception illegal, regardless of the actual human cost. In reality, however, people aren't having abortions left and right - they stopped having sex altogether because they don't have the self-respect, time or energy to have it. So, jokes on the politicians, I guess. Also, humanity will die out in several generations, while waiting on "the invisible hand of the market" to fix their problem - unfortunately, the problem is "relying on the market".
Loved it as always my favourite lessons from my favourite school❤❤❤
I suspect this relates to developing avoidant or anxious attachment styles. Insightful video as always.
Excellent, as always. Thank you. : )
So interesting, thank you🙏
Ah, so we have learned to avoid feeling loneliness, and the way people tend to do it is by weakening their bond, such that its breakage (transient or permanent) is less damaging. It's a stable life when people enter and leave without much excitement either way, but it is less fun overall. It's cool to be chill, but all chill no fun makes Jack a sad boy.
I’m getting tired of missing ppl that I’m 100% sure don’t even remember I exist lol
I miss my mother so much. Please tell me a way to cope without her.
i'm so sorry for your loss. i wish there was a way to help you.
@@shlokaasiingh1512
It's okay.
The meaning of the video is that it is okay to miss people. You have a right to miss your mother and it is okay that you do. Best of luck to you man and sorry for your loss.
I’ve been traveling the world for the last two years and, interestingly, I don’t miss anyone! I think of people and then I send them a message and feel reconnected. Maybe that’s what it is, I act on a feeling of missing and so it doesn’t last. I’m divorced, no children.
The biggest thing I missed was volunteering at a food kitchen and delivering meals to unhoused folk. I missed that for a whopping six months.
I miss you ❤
Read my flipping mind. I resonate so much with this video. Thank you ❤
The fact that this popped in my feed the day before my bf is going on a 2 month vacation... Perfect timing!
damn this one hits close i never pondered what missing meant
Thank you
Signs of God. Another video when i needed it the most.
I used to miss more. Don't know if because as we get older, we get some armors on us ,(or/and) because of todays tools bridging the distance with different ways of 'connecting' with those we miss, deflate that once ever ripening romantic feeling of missing someone. As with fruit, everything gets harvested too soon today and is tasteless. We wonder about the anxiety epidemic. Damn hurry of the times!
Self-awareness includes the idea of detecting whether one has been weaving illusions over oneself. In other words, "copium" does exist, and it's dangerous to fall too deeply into that illusion.
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"Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
--Diamond Dragons (book I)
miss her.
Well, then there's the people who garnered your care and affection only to suddenly treat you as though you are arbitrary. There's validity in the apprehension and fear some come to feel towards opening up and allowing themselves to be vulnerable. Some people really take advantage of it only to take it for granted and there's not really anything that can be done about it, it's this inconvenient pain you could have been without, so pointless and futile.
I continue to miss my dear friend who abandoned me when I married my husband over 30 years ago.
I realized in my teenage years that i didn’t miss people when they moved away or if someone particularly close to me went on vacation. I took a note of that to remember for later because it didn’t seem right. And here we are, 17 years later, trying to heal from childhood adversity. Thank you for these videos, they help break down big topics with complex emotions into smaller, manageable chunks. I’m currently reading The Deepest Well by Dr. Nadine Burke Harris and these lectures go hand in hand with her book.
Hi 👋
I miss my grandkids
This should be good.
Don't let it slip away...is the hardest. But if you can miss them, then you know they exist as well as your love for them. Makes you less lonely❤
You're right and I hate it
Met with a guy online. Never saw him below neck. Never heard his voice. Just fell in love with his soul & personality. 2 years later, he started ignoring me the moment he convinced me to confess my feelings towards him. Things went wrong between us. I don't blame him though! He was a gentleman (if not, at least he acted like one) I miss him so so badly even today. He was the _FIRST LOVE_ of my life. I still do adore him, but I don't want him back now. I don't want all those mental agonies back in my life now
That's really sad! I would be so curious, reflecting on myself. Had it happened a long time ago?
Don't worry. As. They say, there are more fish in the sea
@@Denverun it's been almost 5 years now since we stopped interacting
@@stevemyntti5187 hopefully :)
I heard somebody saying- Someone's *"I'm not sure about her"* is someone else's *"I knew she was the one the moment I looked at her"* ☺️
@@immrssnowi really hope you'll get someone who's gonna be damn sure about you ❤
We had to put my dog down. The house feels emptier without her.
Iosif Andriasov Quote: “Dependency brings sufferings.”
You always end up surprising me... Nice shoot, it hits me hard haha
I should have heard that my feelings is normal.
Wtf what is this timing
Brauh same
انا بحبك، روحي الك يا عمري
@school_of_life please tell us about the topic: missing those whom are dead. Or how to process our grief for our loved ones.
Please I'm desperately needing it
I am one of those people that do not have the feelings of missing anyone. It actually makes life a little easier. I appreciate the way my brain works. Most people don't understand ...that's okay... I honestly don't have the emotions to care anyway 💁♀️
Idk whether to be happy or to be sad for you🤔
I normally dont miss almost no one either, including majority of family members. At the same time i insanely miss men i am in love with, i get very much attached and honestly neither my nor your attachment patterns can be considered as „healthy“.
I always stated that I have no talent for missing. I am an expert in loosing. Lost a child, lost my trust and lost my believe in love. I am pretty sure that I have an attachment disorder. But I have a sharp mind and a good sense of humor. I live alone but am never lonely. I don't miss the feeling of missing. At 64 at last I feel ok.
Being in the military, I think I've learned to not miss people somehow? I don't know if it's a good or a bad thing. I go away for months at a time and I don't ever crave that person whilst I'm away. I just feel bad when they say they miss me and I can't honestly say the same back to them
On the other hand, I have met people - usually girls in their teens and early 20s - who would actually tear up as the point of departure would grow nearer.
It was a touching yet foreign feeling to me as I had long since grown out of becoming saddened by a departure event.
We're toxic, I don't care. We'll keep repeating these cycles until the end.
You help me put my shit into perspective..thank you soo dam much.lol
وانا صغيرة مسافرة من دولة لي تانية وفارقت ابوي بكيت ببكى شديد لدرجة سمعت المطار كلو
The RUclips algorithm is crazy
Maybe the gold middle is to not be attached too much.
Brooooooo... When my highschool years ended everyone cried, but since I never made any meaningful connections I didn't miss anyone. What is wrong with me, legitimately?
Huh I haven't missed someone's company in a long time
Let’s hope you never will x
haven't felt that achievement in a long time :/
Ohhh
that person ghosted me so bye bye
❤❤❤❤
❤
Hmm.. I dont actually miss anyone really.. nor do i villainise them.... There are times when old good memories repop and I am happy to meditate through it and then carry on with my life.. but i never felt missing enough to call someone.. i sometimes wonder if its sign of selfishness?
❤❤❤
This thumbnail made me miss Prismo
TSOL is at it again 😂
i miss my dogs after one day away
who's chopping onions!?
Cmon man
How can ya'll be so 'timely'? Lmao
i miss my dog
This video is so abstract-oriented, I can barely understand it 🙃🙃🙃
Why am I early
🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌
Broo is spying on my omg noo
Dependent like house cats with clownery
Do you mis her/him?
I wish I could apologize for having such deep feelings for him when he doesn't want them at all. I don't know how to express it. I miss him.
The life of a hard working Scientist
The thumbnail and title isn't answered in the video. Waste of time.
It's a no for me dog.
The less people you know and interact with, the less people you will miss. Solitude is the answer. Depending on someone else for some kind of emotional support is just not going to happen. Learn how to turn affection on and off like a light switch. I ghosted my mother 4 years ago and I'd do the same to anyone. Relationships are really not as important as people think they are. Change your perspective.
In my opinion, you sound eerily close to deluding yourself with a fair dosage of "copium". This is (again, in my opinion) dangerous, but only to you and few others. It's one thing to be self-confident, self-aware, and self-reliant. It's another to build a proverbial wall and shut out anything and everything that might trigger you to feel X, Y, or Z.
@@Novastar.SaberCombat I'm thankful for freedom of association.
Agreed but at the same time it's amazing to have this kind of emotional bonds. Even if it hurts, it'll be okay at some point.
This voice sounds a lot like hochelaga
Sorry, but not all children show their grief about missing someone openly. Some hide it and suffer inwardly.
This is absolutely true. That said I do not think children are born with this skill. It happens when caregivers communicate to children that their emotions are unacceptable. This can be done via anger, neglect, shame, and abuse or a simple lack of love. The fact that a child who is 2 or 3 years old can already possess the skills to repress emotions speaks to how incredibly early children can place their caregivers needs above there own.
@@matthewanderson5110 This pattern is already visible at the age of 1. These children learn that they only receive love as long as they are calm and "pleasant". It's a survival instinct. They don't put others needs above their own. They just try to get the necessary attention by behaving accordingly. The pain and stress are there though and they don't learn to express it.
Haha....ha. I really have lost most of my capacity to love. Shame.
Naw it's fine. It's gon be fine