As a former simp I can attest that Anna is spot on. She’s right when she says it has a lot to do with self respect or the the lack of. Looking back my foolishness was directly related to a zero self respect. Thankfully I reformed myself.
Have you reformed? I’m too a reformed low self-esteem person myself I am still in the process of making that change really deep seated in my core Outwardly it feels very much like I am not coming at this whole thing from a place of grovelling but a place with my head held high ( and that feels great) As long as I can keep my composure but as soon as a snap situation kicks in and I revert to instinctual action a lot of my old behaviours surface again And that is often heartbreaking to realise The simp is not truly deeply deeply gone.
It's not a reflection of your value, it's a reflection of your exposure and environment. It's just education and I agree, young guys need to hear this message and adopt it.
Its funny, I treat them good and respectful acting the simp part just to get the last laugh. They are just superficial and I know it'll hurt when Chad dumps their stupid ass and they come running back to the ghost of the simp I portrayed to them. My own mom is a sociopath, I see the signs. So, I enable that behavior to give them the false of confidence and keep getting used by Chad. Lol Chivalry is dead women killed it but "you don't realize what you've got til its gone". I guess its sinister of me to do this. It never fails. Suffering will only make you stronger in the long run.
Another strategy I have when talking to women, is to change my mindset from "how can I get her to like me" to something along the lines of "why should I choose her over someone else?". Instant behavior change and confidence booster.
Sorry, I don't like this. You choose her over other others because you are attracted to her...always. Don't complicate it with mind jumping jacks. Your "why should I choose her over someone else?" sounds more like you talking yourself out of an approach than "confident". "Confident" says in your mind you are blocking out all the this, that, and the other thing out because you are attracted to her and you don't think twice about making the approach in almost any environment. Your self esteem and ego are NOT dependent on a yes from her if you are confident. On an approach, you are of course wanting to get her to like you. Your mission is to get her to like you without you dumping your dignity out all over the floor. It's doable. Your choice to approach her is not the final stamp of approval on her anyway. The ultimate answer to why you 'choose her over others' reveals itself as you get to know her, not in the initial choosing.
@@ImperialArmour Sorry, you'll have to be more specific. Nothing I've said here could rationally be called simping except to a follower of the Beta cult known as MGTOW. You are trying to win a contest by not contesting. Nothing rational about that. You are not going to change women's (at-large) minds about anything by "digging in" to a strident position against them. Women can be very strident too. I'm not interested in a boycott on women. Everything I said here is spot on. Leave me out of your "us".
Here's one of the best things I ever did for my own development as someone very introverted. I approached the most attractive woman at my gym - absolutely stunning. Went on a couple dates. On our second date, she had a bit much to drink, started talking crap about how I was a "nice guy" and she was going to walk all over me and I wasn't going to do a damn thing about it. So I dropped her right then and there. Never felt so good in my life. What I learned? NEVER let a beautiful woman disrespect you. Ever.
At least she had one good quality. She was honest. I think it can more likely be attributed to the alcohol tho. At least you found out sooner than later that she was no good.
@@terrariumrich I will happily cast that stone. Never simped, never needed to, never had the impuls to simp. When I see another guy simp, I feel sad for him.
@@sharonraizor2839 bad argument. I watch videos about many things that I am not. I watch videos about dogs, I am not a dog (as far as you know). I watch videos about the Trump assassination attempt yet I am not a presidential assassin.
Never simped in my adult life. Even when I was younger I never simped either, I was just too shy and nervous talking to hot girls but as I grew past my teens I started to become more confident and dominant.
If a woman says to a guy, let's just be friends, she is really saying, you don't meet my ridiculously high standards to be my boyfriend and never will. Best advice, turn your back, walk away, and never look back.
One thing it took too long for me to learn, if you're afraid to offend her because she may not like a (useful) critique, you've already started from a place of weakness. She needs to learn things from you if you want her to grow. Abundance Mindset, understand and/or act like you have options, even if you think you don't.
Women refuse to learn anything from any man. Women are at war with men. What is not offensive to a woman today, that you thought was good to do, is offensive to her tomorrow, without warning. Usually because she's talking about your private moments with her with her friends, and her friends decided for her that she should be offended. The real problem with women today is WOMEN and their girlfriends who think they're all relationship experts when all they're really doing is gossipping and destroying their lives and the lives of their men, with it. Once you start dating a woman, not only will she know your secrets, but so will all her friends, and eventually the streets know them. This uploader is giving out all these dating advice to men as though she really believes women are worth dating and worth our time. Funny thing, I'm always more content and happy when I don't have a nagging, petulant, catty, passive aggressive woman in my life. Even platonic friendships with women can be an exhausting mental drain filled with never ending insults and indignities. ..
Very true Andrew. I love it. Good observation and a good position to take. Come from the position of abundance mindset. we also need to contribute in form of helping each other grow. Helping our potential partner is one responsibility but also helping our male friends grow and become better men is also our responsibility as men by being a brother to them. We must trust eachother as an honorable brother who is there to be a source of strength and reliability. Qualities not only men admire in men but also women admire in men. Be a good person and a good brother. Be strong. Be safe. Be proud. Tell other men and women to watch Anna and Sarah D Moore for the advice they give to both women and men. I truly believe their information is good and valuable for a healthy man and woman relationship. There is no money in it and a true good deed should not have such agenda. So we should just do it as our responsibility to our community, our brothers and sisters. 08/10/2023 Mehran Gerami
As a single 50 year old who is quite content to stay that way i genuinely feel so sorry for men looking for a relationship. It didn't seem so complicated 30 years ago. Everything it seems now is just so much more difficult for males. They genuinely can't win however they act. Either a simp or a creep or a predator. What happened to women? They seem to crave chaos and drama. It's sad.
Well said. I've given up on relationships with women. I'm in my mid 50s & been burned & turned over too many times- too much drama, too much narcissism & just too much financial & emotional hassle. I can cook & clean my own house. If I'm overtaken by the urge, living in SE Asia, I can hire a girl for $20 who does a better job of pretending she gives more of a shit about me than most women I've been in relationships with & best of all, after that she LEAVES!
43 here, never dated, no longer care. I never felt the need to get laid so they’re going to struggle to find something to offer that I would actually want enough to put up with them.
I simped once, 10 years ago, during my studies. She was a cool friend, but not really more than that. I proposed her to go to the movies, because we had common expectations. We had good chats online, we had fun, she accepted my number when we spoke after class... what could possibly go wrong ? I proposed her a date in the evening. She accepted. I was so excited. I made myself ready and went to the cinema (it was quite a distance, at that time, where I lived). And I waited. A long time. She never came. I came home, send her a message to have an explanation. She just replied "I didn't had your number". I deleted her profil from my social media right after. Now, with 10 years of "experience" in my pocket, when I want to date a girl, I always propose her a place where I would be going to, anyway. If she is OK, I'm too. If she doesn't come, too bad for her, it's still a good night for me.
Late to the party. That's not simping. She stood you up. You asked for an explanation. She didn't have a good one. You walked away. Simping would have been still going for her after that. You had self worth already then!
Especially in this current dating environment, it’s great to see women such as yourself helping men navigate through it while keeping our self worth intact.
As someone who learned about simping the hard way. This is the cheat code. Always keep a 1:1 ratio of interaction. Never initiate only respond. When the flow drops, you let it be until she picks up again. If she doesn't, move on, that's a cold lead. You do not give her anything she hasn't given you. Women will say til their blue in the face otherwise but don't buy it. Men and women are not the same. Men mean what we say almost always. Women have duplicitous language almost always.
Glad you learned and thanks for the cheat code! I usually suggest the 1:3 ratio, with the woman initiating 3 times for your every 1. Intermittent reward is better than constant reward or no reward. Wingmam motto: Always leave them wanting more *but give them enough TO want more.* (And so true about duplicity!)
@YourWingmam its impossible tô get this ratio at least for me. No woman i'm attracted to initiates conversations with me, only the non attractive ones
You can't have a 1:1 or 1:3 ratio or no conversation would ever take place or be maintained. Somebody has to say a good morning or evening or whatever at some point. Keeping score is sad and petty
I guess ratios work for some guys. But the same effect occurs naturally if you're a well-rounded guy who has interests and activities beyond your woman. You're a busy guy. You'll answer her or initiate when you can. Not always and not immediately. She's important, but not the only thing going on in your life.
Don’t even bother. How can you win. This year they want one thing . Mid life crisis happens. And off they go destroying both your families because she needs an emotional change. And now you’re broke in a one bedroom apartment. Date all you want , but don’t get married. 70 percent to 90 percent of woman file for divorce. Im really sad it has come to this.
My sisters led me wrong. When I was a kid they basically told me women want a "simp" that spoils them and gives them everything they want but what I saw was that they prefer to be with someone that doesn't care about them and treats them like shit. I didn't understand it at first but what I came to learn was that everyone wants what they can't have...
A woman who has her shit together and respects herself doesn't want a man that treats her like shit. Change your mindset and then you can find women that want a healthy relationship.
Took me a long time, but I finally found a lady who is an adult and likes to be treated nicely. I have lost a lot of women, including my ex wife because I was too nice. I will stay single if I have to be hateful all the time.
@@jeffcastetter6122 yes I agree I learn that a believer does not need to be with a worldly woman yes I can seem worldly but I do want and try to be the best believer I can it can be hard sometimes
Before getting into life coaching, I simped because I had no clue as to how to socialize properly. So much of this came from a childhood of instability from frequently moving, and abuse. My biggest problem was being too much of a presence, or always being available for her. It is too much, and can be perceived as being creepy. I have learned to back off and to love being alone with myself. Not being anti-social, but realizing a proper time and place for people, not just the ladies. I have basically learned how to read the room with people. People notice, and compliment me on that often. I am 51, and doing this to improve myself as a person. If I find a special lady, then that's great. However, if I don't, I would be fine with that too.
I frequently moved too as a kid and always remember being so uncomfortable everywhere I went. I've ALWAYS struggled in relationships and friendships. I'm not a bad looking guy just never really gotten to that second phase of my life. I always wondered if it was due to my childhood lol. Sorry you said frequently moving so I can relate.
There is a huge difference between putting someone’s need in front of my own and putting their needs “above” mine. Thanks for reminding me of intentionality! 🙌
A nice, honest and clear way to address men. Not this typical toxic, "men are so hopeless" response, that I see so much on RUclips and elsewhere. And I think you are right. Simping might be a total waste of energy for a man. However, I do think women could be a bit more generous because of the effort. There is this tendency among women to see red flags everywhere, and I think it is exaggerated. It is not like all men are bad just because the behave a bit clumsily at times.
I couldn't help but drink to much booze, so I don't drink at all..thus I'm probably not able to keep from SIMPING so I have no interactions with women.. But....life is good!
Yup - old man here too... It changed on us. Chivalry got taken advantage of and used against us - a sign that a man can be manipulated. And they now wonder where all the good men have gone. 🤣
@@gogo-bi9qh Chivalry, appropriately applied is a good way to determine if a woman has enough self esteem and self confidence to appreciate a man who holds the door for her, walks on the curb side of the sidewalk, helps her with her coat, jacket. If she complains that she can do things for herself, doesn’t need a man to ‘help’ her, she’s probably too insecure to be accepting of more serious polite attention. Probably best to keep looking…
I was grossed out by what you described and I'm a guy. I'm an older guy (mid 50s) and I've thought about what worked and didn't work over my life. One thing is I talk to everyone, hit on nobody, and listen. It is amazing how people respond when you take a genuine interest in them. There is a bit of an art to striking up a conversation without being creepy. Sometimes it is an innocuous joke or a simple observation that might seem relevant to them without being about them. Could be just a question. It is about their perception of your intention. I'm married, I'm not even on the market, I just like talking to people. It is interesting how many times that has turned into longer conversations and how often I've been hit on as a result throughout my adult life. I've even had gay men hit on me.
Not always! Some guys don't even realize their power, and are able to attract women, but they just worry about it, like they have some social anxiety or doubts, but really, they have nothing to worry about. Being angry at women really messes up a guy's chances to find a good relationship because that anger soils all their interactions.
@@YourWingmam I don't care but you are the Perfect woman in my eyes your so beautiful Gorgeous pretty well spoken I could be a great student and you that great teacher 🌹😘😂
As a "Recovering Simpaholic", I had to watch this video and I have to say that the information you stated is spot on. I'm glad I figured it out when I did (especially before social media). I used think that I could save women who left bad relationships to find that "good guy" which was ME. But I'm more at peace being a good guy but with the knowledge of not having to try so hard or at all. Thank you for this video. 👍
I really, really hope the younger guys among your viewership listen carefully to what you are saying and understand the nuances of simping vs. being thoughtful and kind. I wasn't taught these things and missed a lot of great opportunities. Keep up the great work on educating young guys that are being taught the wrong message by society.
I used to be a simp in my late 20s and early 30s although I wasn’t as bad as what you described in this video. Women who had baggage gravitated toward me (and the other way around) and I thought I was the “knight in shining armor” that I was going to “take her away from all of this.” This was before social media. It took me being hurt and disgusted to realize that those woman did not want a better life. Even though they said otherwise, they HAD to have chaos and disfunction in their lives. They take a man being respectful and good to them as a sign of weakness. A few years after I got married, out of the blue, I received calls from two exes who just wanted to “say hello” and one tried to friend me on Facebook and even left me a voicemail. Maybe the grass wasn’t greener..?
Subconsciously. Most women crave dominance. Assertiveness. Seduction is a subtle way of dominating her in a smooth masculine manner. No thirst. Just leadership. Simping is the opposite of seduction. Simping is based on external validation. Stimulating her mind emotionally internally is how you keep them.
Just recently found the channel and using your advice to try to get back myself back out there a year after a nasty breakup. I was guilty of simping in my late teens and early 20s. Single for the first time in a decade and this was a great reminder not to let those bad habits creep back up! Although I hope pompous phrases like ''high/low value woman/man" die out someday, I really appreciate channels like these that are intended to help! ❤
Excellent non-simping comment! And yes, high/low value are both derogatory but easily understood. When you hear those terms mentally switch the phrase to "your ideal person." Breakups suck, try to learn from it so you make better choices in future. If you were "too nice" in the past, you may like this video: ruclips.net/video/luJZPwbW6Vc/видео.html 💞
it has always seemed to me that the essence of intellect is the ability to differentiate between two things that are similar, but not the same. In this episode we get the female perspective that helps us to draw a definitive line between being a simp and being a gentleman. Good stuff! Thanks!
as an avid simp I can attest that my simping goes completely unrecognized when I am motivated by curiosity and I’m not trying to gain anything or avoid losing anything.
I like your videos and your voice. I was married to a narcissistic woman for 18 years. I put her needs and values above mine. Learned the hard way that this doesn't work. But listening to people talk about the dating process now is exhausting. I badly want a relationship with an emotionally available woman, but it seems so elusive. Most women want to play games, and for me to earn their attention, and I just want to be authentic and for things to be balanced. Sometimes I think it would be better just to have friendships and family connections and not care about women.
I bet your mom was controlling, and always knocked you and you never got love and attention,praise from her ... same as you ex. get some help read ....You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay it is a good start
Giving any affection, gifts and attention to a girl who doesn't care about you or wouldn't return the same energy is what makes one a simp. This lady has some good advice. Guys have some self respect and don't compromise your manhood or morals for someone who isn't giving you what you're giving them.
Nobody likes a crawler. I put myself in a friendzone because I didn't know better. When I did know better, I put myself out of that friendzone- called her out on her treatment of me( humiliation mostly), told her for my mental health to recover I can't be around her anymore. I've never seen a woman backpedal so hard and fast - " oh, I'm so sorry I didn't know you had feelings for me" and passionately kissing me. That's after periodically reminding me: " we're just friends". What brought this to a head? I got a new year's handshake. From a woman I've known 20 years. Been changing a lot of things since and have started noticing positive looks from some women.
Thank you for addressing this topic. it is sorely needed today! I can tell you that even from a man's point of view, the level of simping has reached a truly ridiculous point. On any forum or group a female member will post a photo, and the way that men fall over themselves to give her compliments or cute smileys with hearts or proclaim their love it is sickening. No respect for themselves and no basis on reality. They instantly fall in love with the outfit or the image but know nothing about the person other than she is somehow perfect.
It's so easy to simp over some girl that you dont even realise you're doing it sometimes. If you give her too much attention, you're a simp. If you dont give her any attention she thinks you aint interested so i just gave up on trying altogether. Being single is just the easy way out. Good video, gave me a lot to think about.
Really well explained, thank you for that. I have been getting off simping habits gradually from girlfriend to girlfriend until I finally cracked and decided women need to be put in their place (I decided I was done with dating). Now that I understand exactly what simping is, and given your explanation, it is super important to evaluate the good and the bad if you have any intention of a relation to last years, but it doesn't stop there. You both have to focus on qualities and make the best of it and NOT put energy in the flaws and rather work around the problems that flaws cause. People just don't put any effort into getting along anymore and a big part of it is we don't know how to anymore. We need people like you to re-educate us all.
Your videos have helped me a lot. I was sliding into simp mode and it is not easy sliding back out but if you pay attention to what you're doing and thinking, you can bring yourself around. It doesn't happen over night and it takes work. It's a lot like quitting smoking and/or drinking. The mind is a powerful tool. Thank you again 🙂
Simping is like smoking: Everyone knows no good comes of it (for anyone), it's tempting to continue doing it once you're used to it, and there can be some psychological pitfalls around stopping. It may take a series of attempts as one works to overcome an entrenched bad habit. But whichever method you use to quit, ultimately it only stops when you simply STOP DOING IT. All the same points apply to simping. Take it from a guy who - eventually - successfully quit both 😉
I learned a lot, thanks. Being a simple man, I think I did many simpings without thinking them through. I just assumed ladies don't like guys who play games, so I played straight, said what was in my mind, went out of my ways to please girls. I avoided even slight mention of their flaws, looked the other way, because I thought last thing they want is a guy noticing their flaws. 😁
Actually girls like a guy that dares to tease them in a playful matter. Could be some humour comment about a flaw you noticed, or if she wares too much makeup etc.
I must admit that I have been guilty on simping. I am working on that and thank you for so many wonderful tips. This video has been especially helpful for me.
I really like how you differentiate between a simp and a gentleman. I don’t want to become a jerk but I feel the need to retain dignity when interacting with women. I admit that I’m often perceived as a jerk because I’ve lacked the skills to be a better gentleman. I truly admire your honesty as a woman. Keep it up.
Vetting. Not Getting. That right there. Thats the key of the whole thing boys. Not being desperate, not being willing to take anything you can get. Its "i think highly of myself, and does this woman qualify to join my life?" The unspoken truth of simping is; Simping is a subconsious reaction to desperation and low self esteem. Goes back to the old saying. Love yourself first.
Thank you for dedicating a video about simping, I hope this gets thousands of views because simps are to blame for today's degeneration of society and I'm sick of reading people cry about women having unreasonable standards after being put on a pedestal by simps.
This is good female brutal honesty. Much of pop culture teaches men to be this way and then sets them up for failure. You're on point, men have to value themselves. The right ones will react accordingly. Simp: Anna Banana, I just built you a pedestal. I want to have you have it. Healthy: So, do you like dogs?
This was good to hear. I don't even try, because I do not want to make them uncomfortable 10 years later. Approaching women is not even a thought. But knowing these things help.
Good stuff. Also, don't be afraid to state your own beliefs and values if they are different from hers. Don't compromise who you are just to please her.
I think of simping as when a man puts on a show of niceness, in a way that burdens a woman with the expectation of giving that man something in return. I'm not a Buddhist, but Buddha was onto something with that whole "detachment from outcome" idea. Just live right, and don't act like people "owe" you for things they probably never even wanted to begin with. Good video. I like the part about character flaws, and I think this is where self-awareness matters - what are character flaws you see in yourself, where can you relate to somebody else as a co-struggler rather than standing on a pedestal of judgment?
@@raularmas1719 Not mutually exclusive, but very very different ballgames. Love-bombing is more about building a relationship of dependency - "I love you so much but if you let me down, you're going to lose that feeling of being loved so much." Simping seems a lot less nefarious, less about trying to establish control - it just creates this awkward social dynamic where it's like "okay, am I obligated to give you something in return?" That's not to say that simping can't also lead to nefarious, controlling behaviors. But it starts at a far lower baseline than love-bombing.
muuchas gracias, Wingmam! I was raised to "give compiments" and generally be a gentleman. but i have built some bad habits along the way. thank you for providing this video- it helps me break the bad habits and strengthen the good ones.
I think simping is normal in younger people, it's a matter of how soon you grow out of it. These helped me get over it: 1. Ditched social media. It's all fake and toxic BS. 2. Developed reasonable goals and actually working towards them. This not only keeps you busy and productive, it also boosts the confidence simps lack. I want to burn fat and get stronger, so I weightlift. I want to make more money, so I side hustle. I want to get a better job in the futire, so I'm getting my Masters. 3. I got to know myself better. I'm halfway through my Army contract and I learned more about myself these past two years than I ever have as a civilian. I credit this because I've become much more introverted and don't hang out with other people nearly as much as I did before. I learned my strengths, my weaknesses, learned from previous mistakes, etc. Introspection is a powerful tool. 4. I've learned to become content in being single. I'm not saying it's perfect, but I've come to appreciate coming home to peace and quiet. I like how I can do whatever I want in my free time. I don't need a woman in my life to be happy. 5. Developed self-respect. I used to be a doormat but I've developed more of a mean streak these past couple of years and I'm simply not putting up with disrespect from others. 6. Respect for others. This is still a work in progress, but it's on the right track. If I'm talking to a chick and she's clearly not interested I just pull the plug and move on. Stinks, but that's life.
I really admire how you translate emotions and other mechanisms often mysterious to men presented in a highly logical manner, plenty of real case scenarios as examples. These materials are to be watched not just once but to be recalled when certain mistakes reoccur (people tend to enforce bad habits over time or simply forget things. Wish you all the best and great concept!
This post is on point. I had a lady who friend zone me for 5 years. I am in a new relationship and don't give her the time of day. When I reply, it's short and and I would reply days later instead of seconds later like in past. Now she is easy to reach
Wingmam motto: Always leave them wanting more. This means giving them just enough *for* them to want something, of course. Glad you turned your ship around!
Normally I would never ask a fish how to fish but your content usually resonates & makes sense to me ,thats why you're the only female dating coach I watch & that's why you're my wingmam .
You and me both. Luckily, over here in Europe, things aren't quite as crazy yet as they seem in northern America. Or maybe I just percevie it that way because I'm in my early 50s and in a long-term relationship. But then, my GF, despite being roughly my age and from the former German "democratic republic", displays all the stereotypical characteristics. Underneath the thin veneer of socialisation there are the universal principles of human nature, so the wisdom applies regardless of culture. 🍻
Since this is my first time seeing one of your videos, my first question is "Why should I care what _this_ person says? What is her expertise/experience/knowledge?" It's a question that many people, on *countless* topics fail to even briefly consider. So I appreciate that in your show notes it says, "DISCLAIMER: Anna is not a psychologist, licensed therapist/counselor... The videos are opinions only, not advice." 👌 While it doesn't give any credentials, you acknowledge what you're _not,_ and that these are subjective opinions. 👍 That elevates you above countless self-proclaimed experts on RUclips, and for that reason I will continue watching the video, with my usual open-minded skepticism.
Being on my own for over three years now, and have been out with three women just on a casual basis, i know I'm definitely never going to just 'settle' for any woman. I know my value and what i want in a mate. The 'lessons' provided in this video, resonate with me and how i conduct my life. I will never be desperate - for any woman. I see that as a huge mistake. I'm sure they see that right away. Value yourselves guys. Be a man 😊
I've been watching her videos for months now and just saw it is wingMAM and not wingMAN. Is lack of attention to detail a turn-on to women? Maybe I can use that! Hmmmm.
This was nuanced, insightful and well presented while being interlaced with humor. I've only just discovered your channel and I like what I see so far. I shall have to explore more of your video's. Thanks for your work.
Which proves the point that they're not capable of stable relationships where they give equally to build something of value, where both partners want to be with each other and enjoy each other's company. If me wanting to be with a woman in order to have a stable relationship and where we get to do things together turns them off, what's the point. Why would I want to be in a relationship with a woman I don't like and therefore reject?
That's crap. Spoken by a couple of real simps. Women can and do appreciate REAL men that have value. Even if you think you don't, you should at least try to act like it. For instance, quit thinking like an incel. Try to be a teacher, a mentor, and SHOW them what kind of man they SHOULD want.
@@jeffro. Oh how predictable you threw in 'incel'. Dearie me, have you already forgotten Tom Brady or was he not a real man who had insufficient value? How about Will Smith? Steve Harvey?
It really is true. I started dating a woman a few years ago that I really was not fond of in the beginning. She was just someone that grew on me and her persistence was wild. I really kinda treated her like "eh whatever" and it wasn't really intentional. Fast forward a few years later and she dumped me 🤣It was like when I actually treated her with respect, she despised me. It was really weird lol Lesson learned.
For a lady, I must say you have a force of being chivalrous in your own way, Anna. It is true, I am using this exact mindset when I'm dealing with ladies nowadays and have fewer headaches and heartbreaks. Thank you.
Guilty as charged.....I don't know what the heck I was thinking.....I am an otherwise good guy, smart, strong, good job, even tempered, etc. but looking back on things I was a simp....I let some really fantastic women slip through my fingers......thank you Anna....wow, the truth can hurt.
When I started to be interested in girls from the age of 13, I was such a nice guy. I thought that being nice was the key to a girl's heart. When I turned 16, I realized that all the bad boys are the ones getting all the attention from girls. From 16 years old on, I threw out that nice guy attitude and no regret whatsoever. My dating life completely changed after that. Now I live my life on my terms. Been with my wife for 30 years now. She is free to be a part of my life or not, up to her but it is on my terms, not hers. I also realized that you should never love someone so much that you cannot walk away from. I can walk away from anyone at any time, without a second's thought.
@@DeadlyKiss000 I am. I am an AHOLE...It has work for me since I was 16, why change on something that works? It is true that I can walk away from anyone without a second thought...I have mastered the ability to be indifference. My wife needs to know that I can easily replace her.
@@DeadlyKiss000 All women say this then do the opposite in real life. It's so funny how much hope you give us for no reason and think it doesn't affect us. I haven't talked to girls since high school and I'm 28 now and rdy 2 go to the Lord
Thank you for providing these examples to tell apart simping and non-simping. This video gives concrete and constructive idea for anyone who wants to improve the interaction with anyone and the better way to know someone well.
I went to a niteclub a couple of years ago meet this girl who told me she was single but unbeknown to me her boyfriend was there and they just had a heated argument before we met and she was using me as bait to get him jealous and to cause conflict i told her i was going to the toilet and I was going to come back saw my chance and escaped the closest exit to get out of the niteclub and sprinted and ran a couple of blocks out of there,and I had noticed before he had a group of friends with him looking to take me out.just be careful guys.
emojis - compliments - banal gifts - grand gestures - expensive trips - lavish weekends - stylish clothes / bags / jewelry. Really - anything you give to a XX will be used against you in some degree - maybe not today, maybe not today - but 100% on her way out the door. example - give her an anniversary set of ear-rings it will be considered a) corny, stupid, cheap, cheesy, romantic b) not expensive enough, the wrong brand , the wrong color, pandering, dusty etc ... depending upon the time line in the relationship. Play as you will. It is best to give them NOTHING - because NOTHING ever satisfies women.
A man who is respectful of others and treats others with consideration is a strong man and not a weak simp. A man who is a nice person is not weak but considerate. Will some emotionally flawed people think being a thoughtful nice and respectful person is weak? Yes! But they are the ones with the problem because when you are considerate to others and when you are respectful to others no matter what they say or do you are connected to your true nature. In summary, I am saying that being positive, helping others, not worrying about other’s opinions of you and doing good for its own sake is an evolved person. A simp is someone who is not authentic and only being good and nice to get something. A good man and a nice man knows a good deed is its own reward.
I was very insecure as a boy and young man. I wanted a woman, but didn’t even know how to begin a conversation, so no women friends or mates for me. It wasn’t until I joined the Army and spent 2 years in S Korea back in the 1970’s that I gained confidence. After that, I still was reluctant to talk with Western women, so it wasn’t until I had married for some time, which went sour, that I actually gained some confidence. Then I could get almost any woman I wanted. I did simp somewhat then, but have since learned to value women as either an asset or a liability. The problem with that attitude is, they’re all liabilities it seems.
Thank you for your insight. I don't consider myself a simp necessarily. I probably do need to rein in my passion and excitement when it comes to other people. I'm just an all in high pursuit kinda guy I dive deeply into anything and all things that peek my interests. But I *can* say once/if someone goes a little cold I shut my attention off for them at least keep it to myself, but unfortunately it may be too late by then. I guess it's just another discipline I need to master when it comes to my interest in people. Here is a good example I could easily write pages of thoughts on this I have to practice restraint even now. Any way thank you for the awesome content and perspective have an awesome day👍.
The problem of simping isn't so much the excitement.. its the idolization. Just be careful about that.. let her know u see her flaws and the effort she puts into being who she is. Simping feels awful sometimes when u feel that everyone takes your beauty and personality for granted.. as if u were born that way.. Most women put effort into being beautiful and developing a character that is pleasant.. at least good women do.
@@Yoginimassage Wow that's honestly incredibly helpful! Just sincerely appreciate that. It's easy to not give any attention to the effort into the preceding effort of what women do. The appreciation is there but you're right I've never considered framing my comments around that. I do honestly struggle to bring up another's flaws. I see them but how in the world do you express that in a healthy way? If you have any advice or examples I'd really appreciate the help, if not just know that you've already helped a bunch... Really exciting concept definitely going to add that to the ol tool belt 👍 I'm also going to mention that as a video idea for her to make content on 😁👌
“You’re the kind of person I would like to get to know” is something I really want to say to a girl I’m interested in. I have given her a compliment telling her about her bright and vibrant personality, and she seemed very pleased to hear me say that. I’m also incredibly taken by her amazing smile, but I haven’t complimented on that yet. I only give compliments to people in general when I feel within myself that they truly deserve it.
Something that I have become more aware of lately is feelings. The way our words effect others to trigger feelings. So someone who can be fully aware of this, from both sides, of feeling and causing feelings, will really rule and reign as the ideal companion. People will always want to be around someone who makes them feel good and feel good about themselves. Someone that makes them have hope for the future that is genuine. Only being made aware of this later in life, I can look back at how I have used this against me. First to put it forth in one sentence... "People remember how you made them feel, so when they remember you they remember feelings you caused." Or TRIGGERED that they blame you for! So always be kind, be genuine and be encouraging. Be amusing and entertaining too with confidence. Confidence is something that is attractive and encouraging to most as well. That is people in general are drawn to those who look like and feel like they know what they are doing. Looking back, I can see where I have been nervous, and said things that were causing doubt instead of putting forth confidence. I can see where the way I have made or triggered feelings in others has resulted in distaste even when not meant to be. While people want truth, they don't want the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Just nudges of words here and there. Too many and it's felt as taking over. People like to be heard and have others listen with interest. To let them speak and be given time. And of course being genuine in your heart, smiling in your eyes, always being kind, polite and respectful. Other things to note. Being critical and talking about putting things down is a turn off. Speak of things that make people feel good about things. Share experiences that make them wish they were there to feel it too in a positive way. Keep interactions short and sweet and they will be wanting more. So don't give much away, and keep a lot for later... bread crumbs that bring delight... as you busily pass bye... less is more... master feelings and knowing cause and effect of them and what feelings your words are causing... in your past, and present... using hindsight to learn how you messed up with them in the past and how you can do better. Words and feelings cause and effect. Master these and you truly are a master of human nature.
@@garychaney5484 Thanks for the comment. Its easy to forget a great flow from the heart and source. I don't plan these things, but found if I am willing to type, in good will, all are encouraged. In fact a new thing I say now days is "I am on everyone's side" for it is not a competition, but a personal journey. So in reading your comment I am once again encouraged by your words, and my words once again. For a trick key is that when you repeat these things, they stick better, and so a reminder is a good thing. In fact reptition with feeling is the most powerful. Feeling is even more powerful for energy, drive and focus to cause things to be. Take care friend.
@@MindTrip888 Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom. I took a screen shot of the conversation as a reminder and tutorial! Green lights and blue skies my friend.
Great video and great vibe and approach overall. I honestly thank you for this. I've laughed out loud so many times watching your videos. Great to have a woman on our side, giving helpfull insight in such a humorous manner.
If the woman thinks you're physically attractive she will give you a shot whether you act nice or you act like a prick. Likewise, if she thinks you're ugly she won't give you a chance whether you act nice or not. That's it.
Pro tip: know what you want. There are six things people look for in a partner: 1. Physical appearance 2. Money 3. Power / Fame 4. Intelligence 5. Humor 6. Integrity I care about intelligence, humor and integrity. So when I was looking for a girlfriend I passed on women who cared about physical attraction, money and power, and instead I focused on women who cared about intelligence, humor and integrity. Instead of simping. I asked women out on dates, paid for the dates, and spent my time getting to know them. After a lot of fun dates (with various women) I eventually found one of the funniest, smartest and genuinely good women out there and I am very happy. Instead of simping I would ask women about the last book they read. The smart women would respond to that question and those that did not value intelligence would not answer me. So this approach helped filter out women who were bad fits.
I do simp in one way like compliment on appearance when first meeting if I'm very stressed. Im socially anxious person. So i default to being overly nice. For me it's the safest way because I put my intentions clearly forward and it's very quick to determine if she's into me or not. But when im not stressed, gesturing her to come here works best for me.
@@manzchello4752 however I don't like to point out flaws in people in general regardless of gender untill they bother me enough. I try to keep a positive vibe.
@@YourWingmam how do you get enough time to reply to ALL of the comments? Do you have a team? Especially when you are getting like 20k+ views. , There will be a ton of comments. Do you hire someone to do that for u. Redbull has hired someone but they don't reply to all the comments, but they do reply to relevant comments . So it will take as much time as replying to every comment.
Thanks Anna, i ran into your videos a few years ago. I think their great. I had all the tools to get women just had a hard time implementing them. Now if i could just find that one that fits my criteria.
Recently discovered this channel (not sure why it showed up in my suggested videos, but certainly glad it did). This is excellent information and advice and I appreciate your direct and honest approach in saying things that need to be said. Hopefully, this will move the needle in terms of breaking a lot of bad habits from us guys and lead to improved dating experiences for both men and women. As someone in my early 50's, this is the stuff that I needed to hear 20 or 30 years ago.
This video has some valuable tips, but it is flawed because it doesn't take into consideration three important things: 1. Women are often confused and tend to act opposite to how they really feel 2. High value men may be prone to "simping" too 3. Depending on the context, "simping" isn't a deal-breaker (expecially not with someone you know well) I speak from experience when I give this example. There's an independent, strong and unique gentleman in the office. He's not the flirtatious type but likes a colleague and occasionally behaves corny around her. This corniness may be labelled as "simping". But the woman knows him, he's only like that with her. It's not turning her off. She's happy that a high value guy has a fun side exclusively for her. The context here is the rapport they have, his image in office, etc. "Simping"is not half as bad as the garbage things that women do, like playing Hot & Cold. When we can put up with so much of nonsense, "simping" shouldn't be a deal breaker like this lady claims at 0:24 - 0:40. Then at 1:24 - 1:50 and other places in the video, she starts defining "simping". She's contradicting what other women with similar RUclips channels say. Women just don't really know what they want (most of them anyway) At 2:13 she belittles men for using this emoji -😅. But she had no problem using it for a lame joke at 5:21. Hypocrite !😠 From 5:08 - 5:13, she makes a wonderful point. However, not all women are mature enough to understand this. The advise she gives at 6:50 - 7:20 on what to say seems pretty cheesy. I'm not sure how she thinks that's not "simping". At 8:58, she tells us that we should give compliments not to get anything in return, but because we are thoughtful. If we really are thoughtful, we'd be more busy complimenting people who don't get the compliments they deserve. This lady is going to tell us to work without pay next. At 9:22 - 9:40, she takes the opportunity to let everyone know that some men thought she was attractive. She says they were "simping". She should be grateful for them. IMO, she looks older than 40 even with all that makeup on (but she doesn't look bad though). Anyways, there are more things I could add to my comment but this is pretty detailed and long already
Your videos provide a valuable service and your Wingman handle is well chosen. We match well with people whose character flaws are things that for whatever reason aren't in our list of deal breakers. It would be interesting to see a video on character flaws and even what some of yours are.
It amazes me that men spend any time thinking about this stuff when there are so many good looking women who give it away easily. It’s not this hard guys.
If you’re a Chad. Simping is fine. All the same don’t simp. Treat them all with derision. It’s a lonely road. But who cares when you’re judged on stupid things, and no effort is required from them.
Anna, thanks again for some excellent content! And yes, I'm a recovering SIMP. 😷 Thanks to your content, I'm starting to have difficult conversations regarding qualites I do not like and over the past week the chemistry is really improving 👍. So is our communication, I'm excited to say! My only challenge involves pet names. As a recovering SIMP, I need to address this 🙂. All kidding aside, I use an affectionate name for my girlfriend and she doesn't seem to be turned off by that. I don't think pet names are universally unacceptable. Thanks again for the excellent content!
Best advice I have ever gotten is to just completely stay away from women,I've watched my friends and neighbors lose everything in divorces,women typically just use men then throw them away when they get everything they were after,I love being on my own its been a simple and happy life and don't have to deal with all of the craziness
I lacked an adequate skill set to engage worthy women. Which means I ended up with women that turned out not so great. The drama queens, manipulators and gold diggers. Instead of desperately trying to morph into someone that decent women desire, I decided to go the simple route and enjoy my remaining years on my own.
In reality I know you want to be in a relationship with that special lady whom ever She might be, but you are very frustrated as many of us men are, my advice is don't think to much on the negatives of what might happen or the ifs take a deep breath one minute at a time and focus on what you really want in a woman. I hope you are not doing the whole red pill blue pill thing with women.
What you're doing is called dissociating, or _running away_ from something. The next stage in your growth and maturity -- should you decide you want to live life more fully -- is to turn back toward the thing you fear, and explore how to be with it. you're judging (from an extremely small sample size) that all women/relationships are bad. I've been with the same woman for 44 yrs., and have learned and grown so much from this experience (as has she). It's been the greatest, most rewarding, challenge I've ever engaged in. Both parties need to bring the willingness to grow and learn together for it to work, though. So, you have to find that courage within yourself... then look for it in a suitable partner. 😇 🙏
It's hard with women, they are a strange creatures. The best way is to ignore them and feel good about yourself, and when you don't need them all of a sudden they will come to you. Women love to play games but men don't. Be a man and stand your ground - even if you are left alone, rather than fall into this scheming.
What does that word originate from again is it short for simpleton?
Simple SIMP meaning: slang for a guy who feels unworthy trying too hard to impress a woman hoping for a crumb of reciprocation.
Sucker Idolizing Mediocre Pu$$y
Lol, she didn't answer your question. If I had to make an educated guess, simpleton seems like a great guess from where the word was taken.
Sympathy -- but in this case -- way too much,..
Simp does stem from simpleton. Originally from a rap song where they refered to a simpleton as a simp
As a former simp I can attest that Anna is spot on. She’s right when she says it has a lot to do with self respect or the the lack of. Looking back my foolishness was directly related to a zero self respect. Thankfully I reformed myself.
Love it! Good for you and thank you for sharing your experience! :)
Have you reformed?
I’m too a reformed low self-esteem person myself
I am still in the process of making that change really deep seated in my core
Outwardly it feels very much like I am not coming at this whole thing from a place of grovelling but a place with my head held high ( and that feels great)
As long as I can keep my composure but as soon as a snap situation kicks in and I revert to instinctual action a lot of my old behaviours surface again
And that is often heartbreaking to realise
The simp is not truly deeply deeply gone.
Sounds simple to me
It's not a reflection of your value, it's a reflection of your exposure and environment. It's just education and I agree, young guys need to hear this message and adopt it.
Its funny, I treat them good and respectful acting the simp part just to get the last laugh. They are just superficial and I know it'll hurt when Chad dumps their stupid ass and they come running back to the ghost of the simp I portrayed to them. My own mom is a sociopath, I see the signs. So, I enable that behavior to give them the false of confidence and keep getting used by Chad. Lol Chivalry is dead women killed it but "you don't realize what you've got til its gone". I guess its sinister of me to do this. It never fails. Suffering will only make you stronger in the long run.
Another strategy I have when talking to women, is to change my mindset from "how can I get her to like me" to something along the lines of "why should I choose her over someone else?". Instant behavior change and confidence booster.
Sorry, I don't like this. You choose her over other others because you are attracted to her...always. Don't complicate it with mind jumping jacks. Your "why should I choose her over someone else?" sounds more like you talking yourself out of an approach than "confident".
"Confident" says in your mind you are blocking out all the this, that, and the other thing out because you are attracted to her and you don't think twice about making the approach in almost any environment. Your self esteem and ego are NOT dependent on a yes from her if you are confident.
On an approach, you are of course wanting to get her to like you. Your mission is to get her to like you without you dumping your dignity out all over the floor. It's doable.
Your choice to approach her is not the final stamp of approval on her anyway. The ultimate answer to why you 'choose her over others' reveals itself as you get to know her, not in the initial choosing.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts I appreciate your feedback!
@@x-man5056 Quit simping, all of us should. That's the only way we can collectively bring up the quality of the dating pool in this modern day.
@@ImperialArmour Sorry, you'll have to be more specific. Nothing I've said here could rationally be called simping except to a follower of the Beta cult known as MGTOW.
You are trying to win a contest by not contesting. Nothing rational about that. You are not going to change women's (at-large) minds about anything by "digging in" to a strident position against them. Women can be very strident too.
I'm not interested in a boycott on women. Everything I said here is spot on. Leave me out of your "us".
@@YourWingmam 👏
Here's one of the best things I ever did for my own development as someone very introverted. I approached the most attractive woman at my gym - absolutely stunning. Went on a couple dates. On our second date, she had a bit much to drink, started talking crap about how I was a "nice guy" and she was going to walk all over me and I wasn't going to do a damn thing about it. So I dropped her right then and there. Never felt so good in my life.
What I learned? NEVER let a beautiful woman disrespect you. Ever.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Glad you got away...The lure can be tricky to avoid for guys...
At least she had one good quality. She was honest. I think it can more likely be attributed to the alcohol tho. At least you found out sooner than later that she was no good.
Sounds like she was challenging you to be dominant and you ran away.
Unless you’re into that
He who hasn't simped, cast the first stone. Everyone has on some way but the lesson is to realize it and don't do it again.
@@terrariumrich I will happily cast that stone. Never simped, never needed to, never had the impuls to simp. When I see another guy simp, I feel sad for him.
@@rasmuswittsell10 And yet you are here watching a video about simping. Why would that be?
@@sharonraizor2839 bad argument. I watch videos about many things that I am not. I watch videos about dogs, I am not a dog (as far as you know). I watch videos about the Trump assassination attempt yet I am not a presidential assassin.
Never simped in my adult life. Even when I was younger I never simped either, I was just too shy and nervous talking to hot girls but as I grew past my teens I started to become more confident and dominant.
Ridiculous analogy
Just because someone is beautiful, it doesn’t mean she is necessarily a good person. 😊
You're absolutely right!
Reminds me of the Daryl Hall and John Oats song, "Man Eater."
1,000,000% true
....if she is not a good person, then she is not beautiful.
I understand that even more, the older I get. Wish I knew at 19 what I know now.
If a woman says to a guy, let's just be friends, she is really saying, you don't meet my ridiculously high standards to be my boyfriend and never will. Best advice, turn your back, walk away, and never look back.
I don’t care for her in the first place lol so being her friend isn’t even a choice I am *neutral* lol 😆
yes, you're absolutely right in that she doesn't see the guy as sexually attractive
Drizzle drizzle is the answer to entitled bints like this one.
Let's be friends Bob.
@@DeadlyKiss000 Yeah stuff like that sounds to good to be true so don't give yourself up too easily lol
One thing it took too long for me to learn, if you're afraid to offend her because she may not like a (useful) critique, you've already started from a place of weakness. She needs to learn things from you if you want her to grow. Abundance Mindset, understand and/or act like you have options, even if you think you don't.
Indeed, it really helps when we embrace that. Thank you for sharing ❤ 🙏
The average guy does not have options but I agree you naturally act different when you do you won’t have to watch different videos like this.
Women refuse to learn anything from any man. Women are at war with men. What is not offensive to a woman today, that you thought was good to do, is offensive to her tomorrow, without warning. Usually because she's talking about your private moments with her with her friends, and her friends decided for her that she should be offended.
The real problem with women today is WOMEN and their girlfriends who think they're all relationship experts when all they're really doing is gossipping and destroying their lives and the lives of their men, with it.
Once you start dating a woman, not only will she know your secrets, but so will all her friends, and eventually the streets know them.
This uploader is giving out all these dating advice to men as though she really believes women are worth dating and worth our time.
Funny thing, I'm always more content and happy when I don't have a nagging, petulant, catty, passive aggressive woman in my life.
Even platonic friendships with women can be an exhausting mental drain filled with never ending insults and indignities.
..
@Linl A mountain beach person
Very true Andrew. I love it. Good observation and a good position to take. Come from the position of abundance mindset. we also need to contribute in form of helping each other grow. Helping our potential partner is one responsibility but also helping our male friends grow and become better men is also our responsibility as men by being a brother to them. We must trust eachother as an honorable brother who is there to be a source of strength and reliability. Qualities not only men admire in men but also women admire in men. Be a good person and a good brother. Be strong. Be safe. Be proud. Tell other men and women to watch Anna and Sarah D Moore for the advice they give to both women and men. I truly believe their information is good and valuable for a healthy man and woman relationship. There is no money in it and a true good deed should not have such agenda. So we should just do it as our responsibility to our community, our brothers and sisters. 08/10/2023 Mehran Gerami
As a single 50 year old who is quite content to stay that way i genuinely feel so sorry for men looking for a relationship. It didn't seem so complicated 30 years ago. Everything it seems now is just so much more difficult for males. They genuinely can't win however they act. Either a simp or a creep or a predator. What happened to women? They seem to crave chaos and drama. It's sad.
@@neillasto7424 so true
Women these days love the drama
@@neillasto7424 I agree
Well said. I've given up on relationships with women. I'm in my mid 50s & been burned & turned over too many times- too much drama, too much narcissism & just too much financial & emotional hassle. I can cook & clean my own house. If I'm overtaken by the urge, living in SE Asia, I can hire a girl for $20 who does a better job of pretending she gives more of a shit about me than most women I've been in relationships with & best of all, after that she LEAVES!
43 here, never dated, no longer care. I never felt the need to get laid so they’re going to struggle to find something to offer that I would actually want enough to put up with them.
@@TheMrrabbit1968 my man.....
I simped once, 10 years ago, during my studies. She was a cool friend, but not really more than that. I proposed her to go to the movies, because we had common expectations. We had good chats online, we had fun, she accepted my number when we spoke after class... what could possibly go wrong ? I proposed her a date in the evening. She accepted. I was so excited. I made myself ready and went to the cinema (it was quite a distance, at that time, where I lived). And I waited. A long time. She never came. I came home, send her a message to have an explanation. She just replied "I didn't had your number". I deleted her profil from my social media right after.
Now, with 10 years of "experience" in my pocket, when I want to date a girl, I always propose her a place where I would be going to, anyway. If she is OK, I'm too. If she doesn't come, too bad for her, it's still a good night for me.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
This! 🙂
@@florianpierredumont4775 maybe you forgot to give her your number exclamation point maybe you should call her and explain
Late to the party. That's not simping. She stood you up. You asked for an explanation. She didn't have a good one. You walked away. Simping would have been still going for her after that. You had self worth already then!
@@pfsantos007 perfect analysis
Especially in this current dating environment, it’s great to see women such as yourself helping men navigate through it while keeping our self worth intact.
YES!
👍
Simp lol
She makes $ at it!
U should be enough just how U R! FCK all this coaching! It’s called self Love u R made in the image of your creator!
As someone who learned about simping the hard way. This is the cheat code. Always keep a 1:1 ratio of interaction. Never initiate only respond. When the flow drops, you let it be until she picks up again. If she doesn't, move on, that's a cold lead. You do not give her anything she hasn't given you. Women will say til their blue in the face otherwise but don't buy it. Men and women are not the same. Men mean what we say almost always. Women have duplicitous language almost always.
Glad you learned and thanks for the cheat code! I usually suggest the 1:3 ratio, with the woman initiating 3 times for your every 1. Intermittent reward is better than constant reward or no reward. Wingmam motto: Always leave them wanting more *but give them enough TO want more.* (And so true about duplicity!)
@YourWingmam its impossible tô get this ratio at least for me. No woman i'm attracted to initiates conversations with me, only the non attractive ones
You can't have a 1:1 or 1:3 ratio or no conversation would ever take place or be maintained. Somebody has to say a good morning or evening or whatever at some point. Keeping score is sad and petty
@@voice.of.reason
it is sad and petty BUT it's the way most dates and "relationships" work.
if you chase too much, it will put her off you
I guess ratios work for some guys. But the same effect occurs naturally if you're a well-rounded guy who has interests and activities beyond your woman. You're a busy guy. You'll answer her or initiate when you can. Not always and not immediately. She's important, but not the only thing going on in your life.
Don’t even bother. How can you win. This year they want one thing . Mid life crisis happens. And off they go destroying both your families because she needs an emotional change. And now you’re broke in a one bedroom apartment. Date all you want , but don’t get married. 70 percent to 90 percent of woman file for divorce. Im really sad it has come to this.
@@walterfredrickson3887 I agree fully... from my post divorce one bedroom apartment!
Yup. I've checked out. I don't have to worry about these stupid lady rules and "laws." I never was a "simp" anyway. My hobbies are my life.
My sisters led me wrong. When I was a kid they basically told me women want a "simp" that spoils them and gives them everything they want but what I saw was that they prefer to be with someone that doesn't care about them and treats them like shit. I didn't understand it at first but what I came to learn was that everyone wants what they can't have...
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Biological sisters are notorious for this, I don't know why.
A woman who has her shit together and respects herself doesn't want a man that treats her like shit. Change your mindset and then you can find women that want a healthy relationship.
Took me a long time, but I finally found a lady who is an adult and likes to be treated nicely. I have lost a lot of women, including my ex wife because I was too nice. I will stay single if I have to be hateful all the time.
@@jeffcastetter6122 yes I agree I learn that a believer does not need to be with a worldly woman yes I can seem worldly but I do want and try to be the best believer I can it can be hard sometimes
Before getting into life coaching, I simped because I had no clue as to how to socialize properly. So much of this came from a childhood of instability from frequently moving, and abuse. My biggest problem was being too much of a presence, or always being available for her. It is too much, and can be perceived as being creepy. I have learned to back off and to love being alone with myself. Not being anti-social, but realizing a proper time and place for people, not just the ladies. I have basically learned how to read the room with people. People notice, and compliment me on that often. I am 51, and doing this to improve myself as a person. If I find a special lady, then that's great. However, if I don't, I would be fine with that too.
You sound emotionally healthy and not hating women like so many of the guys on this thread are.
Respect to you, my brother!
That came from hard lessons growing up.@@frankG335
I frequently moved too as a kid and always remember being so uncomfortable everywhere I went. I've ALWAYS struggled in relationships and friendships. I'm not a bad looking guy just never really gotten to that second phase of my life. I always wondered if it was due to my childhood lol. Sorry you said frequently moving so I can relate.
You're a lovely man Howard!
There is a huge difference between putting someone’s need in front of my own and putting their needs “above” mine. Thanks for reminding me of intentionality! 🙌
My pleasure ❤️
A nice, honest and clear way to address men. Not this typical toxic, "men are so hopeless" response, that I see so much on RUclips and elsewhere. And I think you are right. Simping might be a total waste of energy for a man. However, I do think women could be a bit more generous because of the effort. There is this tendency among women to see red flags everywhere, and I think it is exaggerated. It is not like all men are bad just because the behave a bit clumsily at times.
I really needed this, as an older man who is capable of simping and thinking it is chivalry. Thank you!
Amen brutha! I have to be wary of this borderline issue as well. Glad to know that I am not alone in this case!
I couldn't help but drink to much booze, so I don't drink at all..thus
I'm probably not able to keep from SIMPING so I have no interactions with women..
But....life is good!
Yup - old man here too... It changed on us. Chivalry got taken advantage of and used against us - a sign that a man can be manipulated. And they now wonder where all the good men have gone. 🤣
@@gogo-bi9qh Chivalry, appropriately applied is a good way to determine if a woman has enough self esteem and self confidence to appreciate a man who holds the door for her, walks on the curb side of the sidewalk, helps her with her coat, jacket. If she complains that she can do things for herself, doesn’t need a man to ‘help’ her, she’s probably too insecure to be accepting of more serious polite attention. Probably best to keep looking…
Old men are creeps sometimes
I was grossed out by what you described and I'm a guy. I'm an older guy (mid 50s) and I've thought about what worked and didn't work over my life. One thing is I talk to everyone, hit on nobody, and listen. It is amazing how people respond when you take a genuine interest in them. There is a bit of an art to striking up a conversation without being creepy. Sometimes it is an innocuous joke or a simple observation that might seem relevant to them without being about them. Could be just a question. It is about their perception of your intention. I'm married, I'm not even on the market, I just like talking to people. It is interesting how many times that has turned into longer conversations and how often I've been hit on as a result throughout my adult life. I've even had gay men hit on me.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
Lol 😂 perception is reality. Whatever you believe in your mind
You should have had the definition of simp in the beginning of your video.
@@johnparish1432speak plainly
No one likes a boaster, Johnny.
If you're worried about whether or not she thinks you're a simp, then you're a simp.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
Not always! Some guys don't even realize their power, and are able to attract women, but they just worry about it, like they have some social anxiety or doubts, but really, they have nothing to worry about.
Being angry at women really messes up a guy's chances to find a good relationship because that anger soils all their interactions.
Exact same way you define Alfa Males lol. If you’re worried if you’re an alfa male or not, you’re not.
@@YourWingmam I don't care but you are the Perfect woman in my eyes your so beautiful Gorgeous pretty well spoken I could be a great student and you that great teacher 🌹😘😂
@@LaOcean517 This is textbook simping...
Stay single, boys.
Just pop and dump
*I've got your boy hanging !*
Simps^
No just choose wisely. Been married for 30 years with no regrets. I know I got lucky, but so did she.
😂😂😂@@manivang9792
As a "Recovering Simpaholic", I had to watch this video and I have to say that the information you stated is spot on. I'm glad I figured it out when I did (especially before social media). I used think that I could save women who left bad relationships to find that "good guy" which was ME. But I'm more at peace being a good guy but with the knowledge of not having to try so hard or at all. Thank you for this video. 👍
I really, really hope the younger guys among your viewership listen carefully to what you are saying and understand the nuances of simping vs. being thoughtful and kind. I wasn't taught these things and missed a lot of great opportunities. Keep up the great work on educating young guys that are being taught the wrong message by society.
I'm happy this is helpful, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
I used to be a simp in my late 20s and early 30s although I wasn’t as bad as what you described in this video. Women who had baggage gravitated toward me (and the other way around) and I thought I was the “knight in shining armor” that I was going to “take her away from all of this.” This was before social media. It took me being hurt and disgusted to realize that those woman did not want a better life. Even though they said otherwise, they HAD to have chaos and disfunction in their lives. They take a man being respectful and good to them as a sign of weakness. A few years after I got married, out of the blue, I received calls from two exes who just wanted to “say hello” and one tried to friend me on Facebook and even left me a voicemail. Maybe the grass wasn’t greener..?
Subconsciously. Most women crave dominance. Assertiveness. Seduction is a subtle way of dominating her in a smooth masculine manner. No thirst. Just leadership. Simping is the opposite of seduction. Simping is based on external validation. Stimulating her mind emotionally internally is how you keep them.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Just recently found the channel and using your advice to try to get back myself back out there a year after a nasty breakup. I was guilty of simping in my late teens and early 20s. Single for the first time in a decade and this was a great reminder not to let those bad habits creep back up! Although I hope pompous phrases like ''high/low value woman/man" die out someday, I really appreciate channels like these that are intended to help! ❤
Excellent non-simping comment! And yes, high/low value are both derogatory but easily understood. When you hear those terms mentally switch the phrase to "your ideal person." Breakups suck, try to learn from it so you make better choices in future. If you were "too nice" in the past, you may like this video: ruclips.net/video/luJZPwbW6Vc/видео.html 💞
@@YourWingmam This comment was so nice, she had to post it twice! LOL
Yes
@@YourWingmam People aren't neatly divided into being low & high value.
it has always seemed to me that the essence of intellect is the ability to differentiate between two things that are similar, but not the same. In this episode we get the female perspective that helps us to draw a definitive line between being a simp and being a gentleman. Good stuff! Thanks!
as an avid simp I can attest that my simping goes completely unrecognized when I am motivated by curiosity and I’m not trying to gain anything or avoid losing anything.
cool story
It’s an amazing insight. Sadly I had to learn the hard way. But great content looking forward for more.
Step number one :
Buy a sax doll
Step two: have great time
🎷🤔
You're part of the problem
@@fupalover no its your friends in israel who keeps stealing land of palestinians and klling there families and again who the f are you plz ?
@@chrisedwards6226 How about a trombone doll?
I thought the way you presented these issues were commendable . Gently put and kindly intentioned , thank you.
❤️ 🙂 Thank you for watching. I appreciate your feedback!
I like your videos and your voice. I was married to a narcissistic woman for 18 years. I put her needs and values above mine. Learned the hard way that this doesn't work. But listening to people talk about the dating process now is exhausting. I badly want a relationship with an emotionally available woman, but it seems so elusive. Most women want to play games, and for me to earn their attention, and I just want to be authentic and for things to be balanced. Sometimes I think it would be better just to have friendships and family connections and not care about women.
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
I bet your mom was controlling, and always knocked you and you never got love and attention,praise from her ... same as you ex. get some help read ....You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay it is a good start
Giving any affection, gifts and attention to a girl who doesn't care about you or wouldn't return the same energy is what makes one a simp. This lady has some good advice. Guys have some self respect and don't compromise your manhood or morals for someone who isn't giving you what you're giving them.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Nobody likes a crawler. I put myself in a friendzone because I didn't know better. When I did know better, I put myself out of that friendzone- called her out on her treatment of me( humiliation mostly), told her for my mental health to recover I can't be around her anymore. I've never seen a woman backpedal so hard and fast - " oh, I'm so sorry I didn't know you had feelings for me" and passionately kissing me. That's after periodically reminding me: " we're just friends". What brought this to a head? I got a new year's handshake. From a woman I've known 20 years. Been changing a lot of things since and have started noticing positive looks from some women.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
Well said. NEVER try to hard, people can smell desperation so just keep it calm. Be subtle in your approach with the huns
Thank you for addressing this topic. it is sorely needed today! I can tell you that even from a man's point of view, the level of simping has reached a truly ridiculous point. On any forum or group a female member will post a photo, and the way that men fall over themselves to give her compliments or cute smileys with hearts or proclaim their love it is sickening. No respect for themselves and no basis on reality. They instantly fall in love with the outfit or the image but know nothing about the person other than she is somehow perfect.
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
@@YourWingmam thank you for the great advice and insight
@@portnut7610 No kidding! It's the latest epidemic
Now, I'm learning.
I was simping with her.
That's the biggest eye opener today.
Thank you.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
This was a great video, thanks for the info.
My pleasure ❤️
It's so easy to simp over some girl that you dont even realise you're doing it sometimes. If you give her too much attention, you're a simp. If you dont give her any attention she thinks you aint interested so i just gave up on trying altogether. Being single is just the easy way out. Good video, gave me a lot to think about.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love and clarity ❤ 🙏
Yup. Did that when I was young. Thought I had met the perfect women. I had to have her. So I was overly simpinh😅.
Really well explained, thank you for that. I have been getting off simping habits gradually from girlfriend to girlfriend until I finally cracked and decided women need to be put in their place (I decided I was done with dating). Now that I understand exactly what simping is, and given your explanation, it is super important to evaluate the good and the bad if you have any intention of a relation to last years, but it doesn't stop there. You both have to focus on qualities and make the best of it and NOT put energy in the flaws and rather work around the problems that flaws cause. People just don't put any effort into getting along anymore and a big part of it is we don't know how to anymore. We need people like you to re-educate us all.
You said it exactly, no one teaches us this stuff along the way. Thank you for sharing your experience and appreciating my video!
This was needed here. I hope all the simps on this channel and others will stop simping and grow up
Glad I could help 🙏
New ones are born ever minute. And the modern Western way of raising kids is creating tons of simps.
Your videos have helped me a lot. I was sliding into simp mode and it is not easy sliding back out but if you pay attention to what you're doing and thinking, you can bring yourself around. It doesn't happen over night and it takes work. It's a lot like quitting smoking and/or drinking. The mind is a powerful tool. Thank you again 🙂
My pleasure ❤️
Simping is like smoking: Everyone knows no good comes of it (for anyone), it's tempting to continue doing it once you're used to it, and there can be some psychological pitfalls around stopping. It may take a series of attempts as one works to overcome an entrenched bad habit. But whichever method you use to quit, ultimately it only stops when you simply STOP DOING IT. All the same points apply to simping. Take it from a guy who - eventually - successfully quit both 😉
I learned a lot, thanks. Being a simple man, I think I did many simpings without thinking them through. I just assumed ladies don't like guys who play games, so I played straight, said what was in my mind, went out of my ways to please girls. I avoided even slight mention of their flaws, looked the other way, because I thought last thing they want is a guy noticing their flaws. 😁
Thank you for sharing your experience! I appreciate hearing from you 🙏
Actually girls like a guy that dares to tease them in a playful matter. Could be some humour comment about a flaw you noticed, or if she wares too much makeup etc.
I must admit that I have been guilty on simping. I am working on that and thank you for so many wonderful tips. This video has been especially helpful for me.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
I really like how you differentiate between a simp and a gentleman. I don’t want to become a jerk but I feel the need to retain dignity when interacting with women. I admit that I’m often perceived as a jerk because I’ve lacked the skills to be a better gentleman. I truly admire your honesty as a woman. Keep it up.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
Vetting. Not Getting. That right there. Thats the key of the whole thing boys. Not being desperate, not being willing to take anything you can get. Its "i think highly of myself, and does this woman qualify to join my life?" The unspoken truth of simping is; Simping is a subconsious reaction to desperation and low self esteem. Goes back to the old saying. Love yourself first.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Thank you for defining the term "simping" and providing concrete examples of simping and non-simping.
My pleasure ❤️
Urban dictionary is your friend…..
Thank you for dedicating a video about simping, I hope this gets thousands of views because simps are to blame for today's degeneration of society and I'm sick of reading people cry about women having unreasonable standards after being put on a pedestal by simps.
Agreed! Please share it!!
This is good female brutal honesty.
Much of pop culture teaches men to be this way and then sets them up for failure. You're on point, men have to value themselves.
The right ones will react accordingly.
Simp: Anna Banana, I just built you a pedestal. I want to have you have it.
Healthy: So, do you like dogs?
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Exactly! U got that right!
Along with schools and churches.
Youll end alone @@YourWingmam
This was good to hear. I don't even try, because I do not want to make them uncomfortable 10 years later. Approaching women is not even a thought. But knowing these things help.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
Good stuff. Also, don't be afraid to state your own beliefs and values if they are different from hers. Don't compromise who you are just to please her.
Most definitely!
I think of simping as when a man puts on a show of niceness, in a way that burdens a woman with the expectation of giving that man something in return.
I'm not a Buddhist, but Buddha was onto something with that whole "detachment from outcome" idea. Just live right, and don't act like people "owe" you for things they probably never even wanted to begin with.
Good video. I like the part about character flaws, and I think this is where self-awareness matters - what are character flaws you see in yourself, where can you relate to somebody else as a co-struggler rather than standing on a pedestal of judgment?
Your definition of "simping" sounds a lot like "love bombing" where you practice giving or loving behavior to an extreme degree?
@@raularmas1719 Not mutually exclusive, but very very different ballgames. Love-bombing is more about building a relationship of dependency - "I love you so much but if you let me down, you're going to lose that feeling of being loved so much."
Simping seems a lot less nefarious, less about trying to establish control - it just creates this awkward social dynamic where it's like "okay, am I obligated to give you something in return?"
That's not to say that simping can't also lead to nefarious, controlling behaviors. But it starts at a far lower baseline than love-bombing.
muuchas gracias, Wingmam! I was raised to "give compiments" and generally be a gentleman. but i have built some bad habits along the way. thank you for providing this video- it helps me break the bad habits and strengthen the good ones.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
I think simping is normal in younger people, it's a matter of how soon you grow out of it.
These helped me get over it:
1. Ditched social media. It's all fake and toxic BS.
2. Developed reasonable goals and actually working towards them. This not only keeps you busy and productive, it also boosts the confidence simps lack. I want to burn fat and get stronger, so I weightlift. I want to make more money, so I side hustle. I want to get a better job in the futire, so I'm getting my Masters.
3. I got to know myself better. I'm halfway through my Army contract and I learned more about myself these past two years than I ever have as a civilian. I credit this because I've become much more introverted and don't hang out with other people nearly as much as I did before. I learned my strengths, my weaknesses, learned from previous mistakes, etc. Introspection is a powerful tool.
4. I've learned to become content in being single. I'm not saying it's perfect, but I've come to appreciate coming home to peace and quiet. I like how I can do whatever I want in my free time. I don't need a woman in my life to be happy.
5. Developed self-respect. I used to be a doormat but I've developed more of a mean streak these past couple of years and I'm simply not putting up with disrespect from others.
6. Respect for others. This is still a work in progress, but it's on the right track. If I'm talking to a chick and she's clearly not interested I just pull the plug and move on. Stinks, but that's life.
Thank you for sharing your experience! Hopefully, it will help others learn from it. I appreciate that 🙏
That sounds really healthy except for the mean streak.
I really admire how you translate emotions and other mechanisms often mysterious to men presented in a highly logical manner, plenty of real case scenarios as examples. These materials are to be watched not just once but to be recalled when certain mistakes reoccur (people tend to enforce bad habits over time or simply forget things. Wish you all the best and great concept!
Glad I could help 🙏
This post is on point. I had a lady who friend zone me for 5 years. I am in a new relationship and don't give her the time of day. When I reply, it's short and and I would reply days later instead of seconds later like in past. Now she is easy to reach
Wingmam motto: Always leave them wanting more.
This means giving them just enough *for* them to want something, of course. Glad you turned your ship around!
Normally I would never ask a fish how to fish but your content usually resonates & makes sense to me ,thats why you're the only female dating coach I watch & that's why you're my wingmam .
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
You and me both. Luckily, over here in Europe, things aren't quite as crazy yet as they seem in northern America. Or maybe I just percevie it that way because I'm in my early 50s and in a long-term relationship. But then, my GF, despite being roughly my age and from the former German "democratic republic", displays all the stereotypical characteristics. Underneath the thin veneer of socialisation there are the universal principles of human nature, so the wisdom applies regardless of culture. 🍻
I have used your information in my relationship! Thank you for this! I’ve always thought that one needs to start a relationship by being real friends.
Indeed, it really helps when we embrace that.
Since this is my first time seeing one of your videos, my first question is "Why should I care what _this_ person says? What is her expertise/experience/knowledge?" It's a question that many people, on *countless* topics fail to even briefly consider.
So I appreciate that in your show notes it says, "DISCLAIMER: Anna is not a psychologist, licensed therapist/counselor... The videos are opinions only, not advice." 👌
While it doesn't give any credentials, you acknowledge what you're _not,_ and that these are subjective opinions. 👍 That elevates you above countless self-proclaimed experts on RUclips, and for that reason I will continue watching the video, with my usual open-minded skepticism.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Being on my own for over three years now, and have been out with three women just on a casual basis, i know I'm definitely never going to just 'settle' for any woman. I know my value and what i want in a mate. The 'lessons' provided in this video, resonate with me and how i conduct my life. I will never be desperate - for any woman. I see that as a huge mistake. I'm sure they see that right away. Value yourselves guys. Be a man 😊
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Men. We are the prize!
Thank you for being OUR Wingmam! Your content just keeps getting better and better. ❤️
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
Classic example of a simp right here folks
I've been watching her videos for months now and just saw it is wingMAM and not wingMAN. Is lack of attention to detail a turn-on to women? Maybe I can use that! Hmmmm.
I realise I have been sipping without ever having heard the word, let alone knowing what it meant. Thank you, Anna.
This was nuanced, insightful and well presented while being interlaced with humor. I've only just discovered your channel and I like what I see so far. I shall have to explore more of your video's. Thanks for your work.
Welcome aboard, and don't forget to click on the notification bell to be notified whenever I release a new video ❤ 🙏
Women fall for men who display toxic behavior and reject them.The more they feel ignored the more they try to chase that person.
Which proves the point that they're not capable of stable relationships where they give equally to build something of value, where both partners want to be with each other and enjoy each other's company. If me wanting to be with a woman in order to have a stable relationship and where we get to do things together turns them off, what's the point. Why would I want to be in a relationship with a woman I don't like and therefore reject?
But not if you are unattractive..
That's crap. Spoken by a couple of real simps.
Women can and do appreciate REAL men that have value. Even if you think you don't, you should at least try to act like it.
For instance, quit thinking like an incel.
Try to be a teacher, a mentor, and SHOW them what kind of man they SHOULD want.
@@jeffro. Oh how predictable you threw in 'incel'. Dearie me, have you already forgotten Tom Brady or was he not a real man who had insufficient value? How about Will Smith? Steve Harvey?
It really is true. I started dating a woman a few years ago that I really was not fond of in the beginning. She was just someone that grew on me and her persistence was wild. I really kinda treated her like "eh whatever" and it wasn't really intentional. Fast forward a few years later and she dumped me 🤣It was like when I actually treated her with respect, she despised me. It was really weird lol Lesson learned.
For a lady, I must say you have a force of being chivalrous in your own way, Anna. It is true, I am using this exact mindset when I'm dealing with ladies nowadays and have fewer headaches and heartbreaks. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
Guilty as charged.....I don't know what the heck I was thinking.....I am an otherwise good guy, smart, strong, good job, even tempered, etc. but looking back on things I was a simp....I let some really fantastic women slip through my fingers......thank you Anna....wow, the truth can hurt.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
When I started to be interested in girls from the age of 13, I was such a nice guy. I thought that being nice was the key to a girl's heart. When I turned 16, I realized that all the bad boys are the ones getting all the attention from girls. From 16 years old on, I threw out that nice guy attitude and no regret whatsoever. My dating life completely changed after that. Now I live my life on my terms. Been with my wife for 30 years now. She is free to be a part of my life or not, up to her but it is on my terms, not hers. I also realized that you should never love someone so much that you cannot walk away from. I can walk away from anyone at any time, without a second's thought.
@@mikef2811 That last sentence makes you sound very cold hearted. I don't think that is the real you though.
@@DeadlyKiss000 I am. I am an AHOLE...It has work for me since I was 16, why change on something that works? It is true that I can walk away from anyone without a second thought...I have mastered the ability to be indifference. My wife needs to know that I can easily replace her.
@@DeadlyKiss000 All women say this then do the opposite in real life. It's so funny how much hope you give us for no reason and think it doesn't affect us. I haven't talked to girls since high school and I'm 28 now and rdy 2 go to the Lord
Thank you for providing these examples to tell apart simping and non-simping. This video gives concrete and constructive idea for anyone who wants to improve the interaction with anyone and the better way to know someone well.
I went to a niteclub a couple of years ago meet this girl who told me she was single but unbeknown to me her boyfriend was there and they just had a heated argument before we met and she was using me as bait to get him jealous and to cause conflict i told her i was going to the toilet and I was going to come back saw my chance and escaped the closest exit to get out of the niteclub and sprinted and ran a couple of blocks out of there,and I had noticed before he had a group of friends with him looking to take me out.just be careful guys.
You dodged a bullet 🙏
emojis - compliments - banal gifts - grand gestures - expensive trips - lavish weekends - stylish clothes / bags / jewelry.
Really - anything you give to a XX will be used against you in some degree - maybe not today, maybe not today - but 100% on her way out the door.
example - give her an anniversary set of ear-rings it will be considered a) corny, stupid, cheap, cheesy, romantic b) not expensive enough, the wrong brand , the wrong color, pandering, dusty etc ... depending upon the time line in the relationship.
Play as you will. It is best to give them NOTHING - because NOTHING ever satisfies women.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I appreciate hearing from you ❤
Yep!
Tate actually did a vid on simping soon after this one.
Simping 101. It's very good.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
@@YourWingmam
Cheers!
A man who is respectful of others and treats others with consideration is a strong man and not a weak simp. A man who is a nice person is not weak but considerate. Will some emotionally flawed people think being a thoughtful nice and respectful person is weak? Yes! But they are the ones with the problem because when you are considerate to others and when you are respectful to others no matter what they say or do you are connected to your true nature. In summary, I am saying that being positive, helping others, not worrying about other’s opinions of you and doing good for its own sake is an evolved person. A simp is someone who is not authentic and only being good and nice to get something. A good man and a nice man knows a good deed is its own reward.
I was very insecure as a boy and young man. I wanted a woman, but didn’t even know how to begin a conversation, so no women friends or mates for me. It wasn’t until I joined the Army and spent 2 years in S Korea back in the 1970’s that I gained confidence. After that, I still was reluctant to talk with Western women, so it wasn’t until I had married for some time, which went sour, that I actually gained some confidence. Then I could get almost any woman I wanted. I did simp somewhat then, but have since learned to value women as either an asset or a liability. The problem with that attitude is, they’re all liabilities it seems.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Thank you for your insight. I don't consider myself a simp necessarily.
I probably do need to rein in my passion and excitement when it comes to other people.
I'm just an all in high pursuit kinda guy I dive deeply into anything and all things that peek my interests.
But I *can* say once/if someone goes a little cold I shut my attention off for them at least keep it to myself, but unfortunately it may be too late by then.
I guess it's just another discipline I need to master when it comes to my interest in people.
Here is a good example I could easily write pages of thoughts on this I have to practice restraint even now.
Any way thank you for the awesome content and perspective have an awesome day👍.
❤️ 🙂 Thank you very much may you have a wonderful day as well 🙏
The problem of simping isn't so much the excitement.. its the idolization. Just be careful about that.. let her know u see her flaws and the effort she puts into being who she is. Simping feels awful sometimes when u feel that everyone takes your beauty and personality for granted.. as if u were born that way..
Most women put effort into being beautiful and developing a character that is pleasant.. at least good women do.
@@Yoginimassage Wow that's honestly incredibly helpful! Just sincerely appreciate that.
It's easy to not give any attention to the effort into the preceding effort of what women do.
The appreciation is there but you're right I've never considered framing my comments around that.
I do honestly struggle to bring up another's flaws. I see them but how in the world do you express that in a healthy way?
If you have any advice or examples I'd really appreciate the help, if not just know that you've already helped a bunch...
Really exciting concept definitely going to add that to the ol tool belt 👍
I'm also going to mention that as a video idea for her to make content on 😁👌
Is it too late? Did i simp her to death and now cant fix it??
“You’re the kind of person I would like to get to know” is something I really want to say to a girl I’m interested in. I have given her a compliment telling her about her bright and vibrant personality, and she seemed very pleased to hear me say that. I’m also incredibly taken by her amazing smile, but I haven’t complimented on that yet. I only give compliments to people in general when I feel within myself that they truly deserve it.
Something that I have become more aware of lately is feelings. The way our words effect others to trigger feelings. So someone who can be fully aware of this, from both sides, of feeling and causing feelings, will really rule and reign as the ideal companion. People will always want to be around someone who makes them feel good and feel good about themselves. Someone that makes them have hope for the future that is genuine.
Only being made aware of this later in life, I can look back at how I have used this against me. First to put it forth in one sentence... "People remember how you made them feel, so when they remember you they remember feelings you caused." Or TRIGGERED that they blame you for! So always be kind, be genuine and be encouraging. Be amusing and entertaining too with confidence. Confidence is something that is attractive and encouraging to most as well. That is people in general are drawn to those who look like and feel like they know what they are doing.
Looking back, I can see where I have been nervous, and said things that were causing doubt instead of putting forth confidence. I can see where the way I have made or triggered feelings in others has resulted in distaste even when not meant to be. While people want truth, they don't want the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Just nudges of words here and there. Too many and it's felt as taking over. People like to be heard and have others listen with interest. To let them speak and be given time. And of course being genuine in your heart, smiling in your eyes, always being kind, polite and respectful.
Other things to note. Being critical and talking about putting things down is a turn off. Speak of things that make people feel good about things. Share experiences that make them wish they were there to feel it too in a positive way. Keep interactions short and sweet and they will be wanting more. So don't give much away, and keep a lot for later... bread crumbs that bring delight... as you busily pass bye... less is more... master feelings and knowing cause and effect of them and what feelings your words are causing... in your past, and present... using hindsight to learn how you messed up with them in the past and how you can do better. Words and feelings cause and effect. Master these and you truly are a master of human nature.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
Yes this is very true.. when someone tells u all their exs were crazy or angry. U know what feelings this person triggers! 😄
Words of great wisdom there brother!
@@garychaney5484 Thanks for the comment. Its easy to forget a great flow from the heart and source. I don't plan these things, but found if I am willing to type, in good will, all are encouraged. In fact a new thing I say now days is "I am on everyone's side" for it is not a competition, but a personal journey.
So in reading your comment I am once again encouraged by your words, and my words once again. For a trick key is that when you repeat these things, they stick better, and so a reminder is a good thing. In fact reptition with feeling is the most powerful. Feeling is even more powerful for energy, drive and focus to cause things to be. Take care friend.
@@MindTrip888 Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom. I took a screen shot of the conversation as a reminder and tutorial! Green lights and blue skies my friend.
Great video and great vibe and approach overall. I honestly thank you for this. I've laughed out loud so many times watching your videos. Great to have a woman on our side, giving helpfull insight in such a humorous manner.
Glad to hear that, thank you for your response!
If the woman thinks you're physically attractive she will give you a shot whether you act nice or you act like a prick. Likewise, if she thinks you're ugly she won't give you a chance whether you act nice or not. That's it.
I’m definitely saving this. Not a simp by any stretch but need to internalize the key lessons here. Brilliant stuff.
I'm happy this has been helpful to you. Don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
@@YourWingmam 👏👏
This is SIMPly good info, all men should know!!
I'm happy this has been helpful to you, don't forget to share so that others can receive love, healing, and clarity ❤ 🙏
What a great video Anna, where have I been your whole life!
Glad you enjoyed it! And great comment!!! Cheeky cocky comments are never simpy lol
Where ever you have been make sure you stay there! LOL
@@inconnu4961 That works for me!
RUclips and their algorithm man... Tho, I'll be honest you did spark my curiosity.
❤️ 🙂 Thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts. I appreciate that 🙏
Its refreshing to hear from the "other side", how a man should behave instead of the gasligth woman do on social media. Very informative thank you.
Pro tip: know what you want.
There are six things people look for in a partner:
1. Physical appearance
2. Money
3. Power / Fame
4. Intelligence
5. Humor
6. Integrity
I care about intelligence, humor and integrity. So when I was looking for a girlfriend I passed on women who cared about physical attraction, money and power, and instead I focused on women who cared about intelligence, humor and integrity.
Instead of simping. I asked women out on dates, paid for the dates, and spent my time getting to know them.
After a lot of fun dates (with various women) I eventually found one of the funniest, smartest and genuinely good women out there and I am very happy.
Instead of simping I would ask women about the last book they read. The smart women would respond to that question and those that did not value intelligence would not answer me. So this approach helped filter out women who were bad fits.
I do simp in one way like compliment on appearance when first meeting if I'm very stressed. Im socially anxious person. So i default to being overly nice.
For me it's the safest way because I put my intentions clearly forward and it's very quick to determine if she's into me or not.
But when im not stressed, gesturing her to come here works best for me.
Right. This proves they aren’t worth the effort if it’s all a game. We know they have flaws. Ok so let’s focus on the negative I guess.
@@manzchello4752 however I don't like to point out flaws in people in general regardless of gender untill they bother me enough.
I try to keep a positive vibe.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
@@YourWingmam how do you get enough time to reply to ALL of the comments? Do you have a team?
Especially when you are getting like 20k+ views. , There will be a ton of comments. Do you hire someone to do that for u.
Redbull has hired someone but they don't reply to all the comments, but they do reply to relevant comments . So it will take as much time as replying to every comment.
As always, great advice. Thanks!
My pleasure ❤️
Thanks Anna, i ran into your videos a few years ago. I think their great. I had all the tools to get women just had a hard time implementing them. Now if i could just find that one that fits my criteria.
Thank you for the distinction between simping and chivalry, that was useful.
My pleasure ❤️
Recently discovered this channel (not sure why it showed up in my suggested videos, but certainly glad it did). This is excellent information and advice and I appreciate your direct and honest approach in saying things that need to be said. Hopefully, this will move the needle in terms of breaking a lot of bad habits from us guys and lead to improved dating experiences for both men and women. As someone in my early 50's, this is the stuff that I needed to hear 20 or 30 years ago.
Welcome aboard, and don't forget to subscribe and click onthe notification bell to be notified whenever I release a new video ❤ 🙏
I'm dumb as hell about women, but even I know NEVER to pay one a compliment on her attractiveness. They know, and they're told so 24-7.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate that ❤️
Thank you for your tip! I'll not be a nice guy no more! I understand exactly
I'm happy this has been helpful to you 🙏
This video has some valuable tips, but it is flawed because it doesn't take into consideration three important things:
1. Women are often confused and tend to act opposite to how they really feel
2. High value men may be prone to "simping" too
3. Depending on the context, "simping" isn't a deal-breaker (expecially not with someone you know well)
I speak from experience when I give this example. There's an independent, strong and unique gentleman in the office. He's not the flirtatious type but likes a colleague and occasionally behaves corny around her. This corniness may be labelled as "simping". But the woman knows him, he's only like that with her. It's not turning her off. She's happy that a high value guy has a fun side exclusively for her. The context here is the rapport they have, his image in office, etc.
"Simping"is not half as bad as the garbage things that women do, like playing Hot & Cold. When we can put up with so much of nonsense, "simping" shouldn't be a deal breaker like this lady claims at 0:24 - 0:40.
Then at 1:24 - 1:50 and other places in the video, she starts defining "simping". She's contradicting what other women with similar RUclips channels say. Women just don't really know what they want (most of them anyway)
At 2:13 she belittles men for using this emoji -😅. But she had no problem using it for a lame joke at 5:21. Hypocrite !😠
From 5:08 - 5:13, she makes a wonderful point. However, not all women are mature enough to understand this.
The advise she gives at 6:50 - 7:20 on what to say seems pretty cheesy. I'm not sure how she thinks that's not "simping".
At 8:58, she tells us that we should give compliments not to get anything in return, but because we are thoughtful. If we really are thoughtful, we'd be more busy complimenting people who don't get the compliments they deserve. This lady is going to tell us to work without pay next.
At 9:22 - 9:40, she takes the opportunity to let everyone know that some men thought she was attractive. She says they were "simping". She should be grateful for them. IMO, she looks older than 40 even with all that makeup on (but she doesn't look bad though).
Anyways, there are more things I could add to my comment but this is pretty detailed and long already
Your videos provide a valuable service and your Wingman handle is well chosen. We match well with people whose character flaws are things that for whatever reason aren't in our list of deal breakers. It would be interesting to see a video on character flaws and even what some of yours are.
Thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts. I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
It amazes me that men spend any time thinking about this stuff when there are so many good looking women who give it away easily. It’s not this hard guys.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️
Only if you're rich. Till then forget about it. 😅
If you’re a Chad. Simping is fine. All the same don’t simp. Treat them all with derision. It’s a lonely road. But who cares when you’re judged on stupid things, and no effort is required from them.
It definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
Anna, thanks again for some excellent content! And yes, I'm a recovering SIMP. 😷
Thanks to your content, I'm starting to have difficult conversations regarding qualites I do not like and over the past week the chemistry is really improving 👍. So is our communication, I'm excited to say!
My only challenge involves pet names. As a recovering SIMP, I need to address this 🙂. All kidding aside, I use an affectionate name for my girlfriend and she doesn't seem to be turned off by that. I don't think pet names are universally unacceptable.
Thanks again for the excellent content!
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate your feedback ❤️ 🙏
Most men have simped at one time or another.
It's so nice that interactions are always so really very simple & never complicated!!🤣
Best advice I have ever gotten is to just completely stay away from women,I've watched my friends and neighbors lose everything in divorces,women typically just use men then throw them away when they get everything they were after,I love being on my own its been a simple and happy life and don't have to deal with all of the craziness
I feel you, it definitely isn't an easy situation, but the focus needs to be on doing what is truly best 🙏
I lacked an adequate skill set to engage worthy women. Which means I ended up with women that turned out not so great. The drama queens, manipulators and gold diggers. Instead of desperately trying to morph into someone that decent women desire, I decided to go the simple route and enjoy my remaining years on my own.
In reality I know you want to be in a relationship with that special lady whom ever She might be, but you are very frustrated as many of us men are, my advice is don't think to much on the negatives of what might happen or the ifs take a deep breath one minute at a time and focus on what you really want in a woman. I hope you are not doing the whole red pill blue pill thing with women.
What you're doing is called dissociating, or _running away_ from something. The next stage in your growth and maturity -- should you decide you want to live life more fully -- is to turn back toward the thing you fear, and explore how to be with it. you're judging (from an extremely small sample size) that all women/relationships are bad. I've been with the same woman for 44 yrs., and have learned and grown so much from this experience (as has she). It's been the greatest, most rewarding, challenge I've ever engaged in.
Both parties need to bring the willingness to grow and learn together for it to work, though. So, you have to find that courage within yourself... then look for it in a suitable partner.
😇
🙏
I used to be called a nice guy but now I’m a simp. So now I am the doucebag women complain about. Thank you feminist.
🙏 I hope you reach the point of truly doing what is best.
It's hard with women, they are a strange creatures. The best way is to ignore them and feel good about yourself, and when you don't need them all of a sudden they will come to you. Women love to play games but men don't. Be a man and stand your ground - even if you are left alone, rather than fall into this scheming.
Thank you for your feedback, I appreciate hearing from you ❤️