How To Push Through Tough Tasks - ADHD Skills Part 2

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 2 июн 2024
  • With ADHD, procrastination is huge. No one wants to do unpleasant things. But with ADHD, you can avoid doing things just because the scope of the task seems too great. It may have too many steps or you think it’s going to take too long.
    This video is talking about how to follow through with tasks that you would ordinarily put off. The two tips for that is pairing pleasant activities with the unpleasant ones. This means you have already generated the task list and identified which parts are unpleasant and how long it should take you. You saw how to that in the video that preceded this one. You use the pleasant activity either immediately afterward as reward to look forward to or you do it simultaneously with the unpleasant activity. You can also create a comforting environment in which to do the unpleasant activity to make it more tolerable. Like taking bad tasting medicine with something sweet. And you can adjust the time that you do the hated stuff so that it’s just before you do something you like.
    The second tip to being able to follow through with tasks is to prioritize them in order of importance. This helps reduce wasting time on unimportant things so that every important thing doesn’t become urgent. Firedrills beget more firedrills. And a constant state of urgency and catchup makes you extremely inefficient and neglectful of the things that are really important.
    ADHD VIDEO on EXECUTIVE FUNCTION
    • What is Executive Func...
    Want to know more about mental health and self-improvement? On this channel I discuss topics such as bipolar disorder, major depression, anxiety disorders, attention deficit disorder (ADHD), relationships and personal development/self-improvement. I upload weekly. If you don’t want to miss a video, click here to subscribe. goo.gl/DFfT33
    Disclaimer: All of the information on this channel is for educational purposes and not intended to be specific/personal medical advice from me to you. Watching the videos or getting answers to comments/question, does not establish a doctor-patient relationship. If you have your own doctor, perhaps these videos can help prepare you for your discussion with your doctor.

Комментарии • 729

  • @DrTraceyMarks
    @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +89

    WATCH NEXT - *ORGANIZATION FOR ADHD* ruclips.net/video/_uX0KGY-tQU/видео.html

    • @raptorfox9513
      @raptorfox9513 3 года назад +5

      What about the accountability issues with ADHD and ED? Like how do you trick your brain to actually not skip it and not go directly to the reward?

    • @moonchild8480
      @moonchild8480 3 года назад +2

      @@raptorfox9513 I have the same issue. I feel like I can get the award regardless of whether i do the task or not :/

    • @tanguerafeliz5096
      @tanguerafeliz5096 3 года назад +5

      Thank you for these BOLDED WATCH NEXT links so our brains can see them ❤️. I sort of figured some of this out but I really wish I had found this video in July when you posted. Can you please do one about ADHD and how to communicate better?

    • @jaynestag95
      @jaynestag95 2 года назад +2

      My son has ADHD my other son has Aspergers and ODD but I'm here for me. I have depression agoraphobia and social anxiety but I'm here to learn how to see a task through as I'm 55yrs and haven't achieved it yet..😔

    • @jaynestag95
      @jaynestag95 2 года назад +2

      @@tanguerafeliz5096 my son who is now 32 yrs has ADHD if you have a question I'm here.😊

  • @chasingcats4
    @chasingcats4 3 года назад +1846

    I love how your ADHD videos are tailored for ADHD people in terms of its format: there’s no distracting background music, you explain and give examples as needed so you don’t waffle, and, my favourite, you summarise at the end in a few dot points (half the time I got lost midway in the video). Thank you.

    • @vhjvbhjb5280
      @vhjvbhjb5280 2 года назад +43

      I feel like it’s easier with some type of background music or animation. Otherwise I think I get bored and I need to replay the same sentences multiple times sometimes to be able to understand it. Btw have watching 2 min of the video, the rest of the video i have been looking at the comments

    • @rayu2794
      @rayu2794 2 года назад +8

      I wish they were shorter, I

    • @msphil4life
      @msphil4life 2 года назад +1

      Agree!!

    • @Darkfyre755
      @Darkfyre755 2 года назад +10

      This actually made it way harder for me to focus on, my brain needs stimulus to stay focused lol

    • @ayaelwi8652
      @ayaelwi8652 2 года назад

      So true!

  • @savannah4439
    @savannah4439 8 месяцев назад +36

    Tip for other ADHDers: in my experience, I prefer starting with some tasks that are considered “low priority” (in unimportant + not urgent quadrant) in order to “build up” motivation/momentum. Hopefully that triggers hyperfixation on productivity to then get started on the “high priority” tasks (important + urgent). If I try to accomplish the high priority tasks first, the overwhelm avoidance is too strong and I never get to any of the tasks at all. The low priority things are way less overwhelming, making it more likely for me to actually do it. Basically starting with the small inconsequential things is the only way I will ever get anything done without relying on the sheer panic of doing things the day of a deadline lol

    • @Tamaresque
      @Tamaresque 5 дней назад

      So, in this case, don't eat that frog first! 😄
      Thanks. That's really quite helpful.

  • @gabrielamarcano453
    @gabrielamarcano453 3 года назад +444

    I'd never clicked so fast on a video... I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD, but whenever I need to do something, whether it's the most basic household chore or a hard task, I feel extremely overwhelmed and I don't know when or where to start. I feel like the task is too great and things that should take like 20 minutes, take me 3 to 4 hours (like washing the dishes)

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +79

      Yes, Gabriela. I hear you. I talk about breaking tasks up and seeing how long things actually take in this video if you didn't see it already. ruclips.net/video/fWRF6BJ1OQk/видео.html

    • @gabrielamarcano453
      @gabrielamarcano453 3 года назад +29

      @@DrTraceyMarks thank you so much, Dr. Marks 💜

    • @denniswondrak5772
      @denniswondrak5772 3 года назад +15

      Gabriela Marcano I can and do relate. You’re not alone. Thanks again Dr. Marks!

    • @deefee701
      @deefee701 3 года назад +8

      You are definitely not alone. Maybe it's life today but I think we are more critical of ourselves today. This is a great video and we can help others, including ADHD suffers, from what we learn. Eg the time log.

    • @shivangidhingra7834
      @shivangidhingra7834 3 года назад +7

      Feel exactly similar to this and more, a lot more. But not diagnosed either. Could it be a matter of worry in that regard?!

  • @happynjoyousnfree
    @happynjoyousnfree 2 года назад +337

    The "aversive" problem for me is this: I feel like shit about myself whether I do the task or not, so I'd rather just not do it and at least not waste the effort. I am never happy with what I've done because usually because it seems like too little too late or I just feel stupid about procrastinating it in the first place. I've worked on this for years but it's still a big issue for me.

    • @Catsalive
      @Catsalive 2 года назад +27

      I've had this too. Had to work on self worth and find out my talents and skills. I did that when someone tried to move me out of my job. I had to fight to keep it but that was what brought out the information I'd been needing for 20 years.

    • @lynellbohannon5191
      @lynellbohannon5191 2 года назад +19

      @@Catsalive same! I've started working on self-worth at the end of '20. It's been great but now this is showing up... I'm thankful for awareness of this issue. Working on self worth, self esteem is important and urgent bc we can easily view ourselves as incompetent.

    • @franimal86
      @franimal86 2 года назад +23

      That feeling you have is not who you are. It’s a passing feeling, so you can acknowledge it, but then let it go. You are not stupid, lazy or never happy. You might be feeling stupid, lazy or not happy, but again, it’s a passing feeling. I hope you can separate your self from these negative feelings/intrusive thoughts. It is never a waste of effort because you will always learn something!

    • @KalishKovacs
      @KalishKovacs 2 года назад +13

      perfection is your enemy, it doesn't exist. but it haunts you. anything worth doing is worth doing poorly.

    • @bradbunnell1891
      @bradbunnell1891 2 года назад +8

      Hi, Jane! Welcome to the club! What you said is exactly the same for me. It's good to know I'm not alone. Does anyone know where I could attend an ADHD Anon meeting? That's a joke, but seriously, are there ADHD support groups?

  • @H.E.L.E.N.A.
    @H.E.L.E.N.A. 2 года назад +193

    Calling my thesis an "unpleasant activity" is weirdly comforting. Like, I don't have to like doing this. It's just some nuisance I have to get through 😂

    • @violasaurusrex
      @violasaurusrex Год назад +7

      Hahahaha I needed to hear this today. Agreed!

  • @CindyCya
    @CindyCya 3 года назад +102

    “Watching something on television” cuts to a man attentively watching a skeleton dance .

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +42

      That's good television! 🙂

    • @shivangidhingra7834
      @shivangidhingra7834 3 года назад +25

      Anything's great television when you're avoiding important tasks 😣😅

    • @hellomoto5870
      @hellomoto5870 3 года назад +4

      😂😂😂😂

  • @cole9533
    @cole9533 2 года назад +179

    I am endlessly envious of ADHD people who can use coping strategies like these. My ADHD + depression has made it nearly impossible for me to get the most basic tasks done. When I need to get homework done, but I don’t want to do it, there’s no amount of self-motivating, or goal setting, or planning that will change my mindset. It’s as if there’s a physical barrier blocking me from doing what I need to do, and I’m watching my own self-destruction helplessly.

    • @prachipathak3741
      @prachipathak3741 Год назад +4

      hey! I hope you are doing fine. How are you?

    • @TM-oe2on
      @TM-oe2on Год назад +4

      So, what has to happen for you to finally get it done?

    • @masterprattu
      @masterprattu Год назад +15

      Please start going to the gym and lifting weights. It will help you gain motivation and self-esteem. Best of luck.

    • @cheesenuggets4714
      @cheesenuggets4714 Год назад +23

      ​@@masterprattu unlike you, when you have depression, going to anywhere is a daunting and tiring enough task, and in my personal experience; even daily tasks aren't able to be done simply because you can't even do anything (and often are delayed even if they are mandatory, and you can miss deadlines and once-daily things much easier). Do your research about depression and talk to those who have/had it, before giving advice to someone. While you may not ment what you said in a brash way, it comes out and interprets as so simply because of your lack of knowledge.

    • @cbmk788
      @cbmk788 11 месяцев назад +21

      I know it's been a year but I hope you consider professional help. You DO have a physical barrier stopping you from doing this stuff -- it's called a dopamine and serotonin dysregulation (I have it too). You may need a combination of meds and therapy to help with this. Or an adhd coach. You may also have a history of negative self-talk as a coping mechanism that can be helped, through talk therapy. Please know it can be managed and you can even begin to lean in to the strengths your brain offers (trust me, there are many).

  • @user-cw7fd9kg6g
    @user-cw7fd9kg6g 3 года назад +237

    hahaha i'm watching this after hours of wondering when i'll get stuff done

    • @ninalopez1593
      @ninalopez1593 3 года назад +1

      Same

    • @alexhjc8
      @alexhjc8 3 года назад +1

      Now!

    • @toobossforchuck
      @toobossforchuck 3 года назад +5

      More like days and weeks for me 😭

    • @gnedsu
      @gnedsu 3 года назад +8

      I've been in the bathroom for an hour watching her videos.

    • @mandarinablue8438
      @mandarinablue8438 3 года назад +4

      Same. I have been down all week.

  • @toobossforchuck
    @toobossforchuck 3 года назад +161

    I've tried the urgent/important prioritization strategy, but I end up staring at it and getting depressed because the only thing that motivates me is when things are interesting. And when I see a bunch of uninteresting urgent/important tasks I just start hating my life. It feels like everything people consider "unimportant" is something I enjoy that makes my life meaningful but when homework and chores take up my whole day I don't have time for things I enjoy. And things take so much longer when you have ADHD. Combining unpleasant + pleasant tasks kind of works but it makes me sad, I feel like I have to choose between enjoying things mindfully while tasks pile up, or doing tasks without time for things I like, or doing things I enjoy during the task but not really being able to enjoy it.
    Edit: sorry that got so negative, I also want to thank you for this video because it did come at a really good time and had some good ideas!

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +80

      No worries Mel I hear your frustration. Sometimes lists can be very sobering and not fun to look at especially if there’s a lot of mundane things on it and it reminds you of all the stuff you have to do. Maybe it could work better for you to have multiple lists. A master list just so you can keep up with the things you eventually need to accomplish. But then pull some things off of the list that are reasonable to do in the short term. It’s hard to be specific without having more details but just a thought to get away from looking at a big list

    • @mortenhy1974
      @mortenhy1974 3 года назад +4

      That sounds like me.

    • @ravishingtwinkle3811
      @ravishingtwinkle3811 3 года назад +13

      I am an Infj and you speak exactlyyy what I feel. I feel all Non sensors might face similar issues. I do mundane task now by trying to define why. By trying to find meaning behind it. By trying to define how would it help me. Also by being kind to myself. Sometimes not doing can be a choice and I will honour that choice too

    • @melissasaal8577
      @melissasaal8577 3 года назад +3

      Mel Olsson OMG you just said all-my-life paradox better than I could ever word it myself. Thank you 💝

    • @silvergirl2847
      @silvergirl2847 3 года назад +4

      same here lists enforce everything i havent accomplished.

  • @Mackymon
    @Mackymon 3 года назад +56

    I have ADHD and organize things into an importance/urgency matrix. I spend way too much time trying to figure out where to put a task (i.e. it'll take me 15-20 minutes for a single task trying to figure out "what does 'important' truly mean." ) It's debilitating.

    • @SmallSpoonBrigade
      @SmallSpoonBrigade 2 года назад +2

      Yep, I need to do that. I also need to make sure that every important thing eventually migrates to the important and urgent square.

    • @manifestdigitalagency
      @manifestdigitalagency 2 года назад +2

      I understand completely. For me it is exactly like this, the rabbit hole of what things “truly” mean and what is really important, why, and how does society/the collective consciousness or whatever determined that this is important and that isn’t. Meanwhile it’s the evening, I haven’t eaten nor have I got any food at home, etc. For me it’s the lack of ability to categorise things or understand time. It’s like I’m living in a dream most of the time where I simply “wake up” at different stations throughout the day. Until something becomes so pressing that I HAVE to do it, and by then I am so unmotivated and/or so rushed that I just do the bare minimum. It’s become worse with time and it’s at the stage where I am hardly functioning. Yet I live in a city where it’s almost impossible to get a proper diagnosis. Not enough doctors and the ones available are pretty bad.

    • @ladelcolectivo
      @ladelcolectivo Год назад +1

      Same!!!!!!

    • @kitsu13
      @kitsu13 Год назад

      Instead of putting things in a matrix, I just sort by most to least urgent. Like, this one thing can wait, but this other thing needs to be done by Wednesday, so I'll do the thing with the hard deadline first (for example). It's not always easy to tell which of two things is more important, but I can usually narrow it down enough to have a rough working order of what to start on first. Then I don't have to decide whether something is important - just how important it is in comparison to other stuff. Eating > laundry. Having clean clothes to wear to work > finishing that one work task that can wait a few days.

    • @roylhighness420
      @roylhighness420 7 месяцев назад

      Get yourself into the mindset to do your tasks shitty and half assed. It helps me a lot because I find it takes the pressure off and it makes it kinda fun like “screw you task, you make my life hell, so I’m gonna get your stupid job done and down badly!” It makes me feel better to not beat myself up but rather the task. It gets done and it’s never as bad as a job as I planned. Rather than yell at myself I “take it out” on this piece of shit chore I have to do. Getting the aggression out towards to task may not be the healthiest but it’s better than brow beating myself.

  • @shaggybreeks
    @shaggybreeks Год назад +98

    Dr. Marks, I started watching your videos about a week ago, and at 75, I *finally* know what's been holding me back all my life. ADHD. I didn't know much about it, but I've been watching quite a few videos by you and others on the subject, and learned that some of the behaviors I have are classic ADHD symptoms. I'm NOT paranoid-schizophrenic as some have suggested, and my depression which is real, was CAUSED by the ADHD. I've been to several doctors, and I'm surprised that NONE of them have ever mentioned it. I developed a strong dislike of seeing "shrinks" because I was always having to talk about things that embarrassed me. LISTENING, it turns out, is much more therapeutic for me. (Yes, I'm aware of confirmation bias and self-diagnosis, and there's more to my situation, e.g. paralyzing intrusive thoughts sometimes, but THANK YOU.

    • @shoot4themoon406
      @shoot4themoon406 Год назад +8

      So happy for you! It's nice to finally know what the "problem" is. I am going through the same thing. It's a relief.

    • @jeanettesummers4677
      @jeanettesummers4677 Год назад +1

      59 just got diagnosed with ADHD. Prescribed 10 m generic ADDEROL. Not seeming to help my focus very much

    • @GreatMindsSeekTruth
      @GreatMindsSeekTruth 9 месяцев назад

      @@jeanettesummers4677
      That’s a very low starting dose. I hope by now…they’ve raised it a bit!

    • @Tamaresque
      @Tamaresque 5 дней назад

      I am the same. I'm 71, and realised I was an undiagnosed ADHD person some years ago, but knowing what's wrong and being able to work around it are two different things. I'm hoping I'll not only learn, but put into practice, the things I'm learning while watching these videos.

  • @GilliMarieMoody
    @GilliMarieMoody Год назад +1

    All day long, I’ve been asking myself, “How do I clean my WHOLE kitchen?” I got SO much done. Back to it now!

  • @johnroekoek9864
    @johnroekoek9864 3 года назад +23

    4:06 "If you just push through". My mom forced me to declutter my whole bedroom when I was a child once. Like most parents do,and I don't blame them. We didn't knew I have Inattentive ADHD back then. I was totally overwhelmed and felt like crying the whole time. Than my nose started bleeding. Later in life, my nose started to bleed when I pushed through while I felt like my head exploded from emotions like overwhelm.
    Luckily I had a deep build-in closet in my bedroom, so I stuffed my stuff in a trash bag and 'burried' it all the way back in my closet. My mom said: "You see? You can declutter your room". 🤔

    • @monicarenee7949
      @monicarenee7949 Год назад +2

      Ha I used to hide things in the closet and under the rug

    • @p.f.h.2146
      @p.f.h.2146 7 месяцев назад

      I would hide things under the bed

  • @valubaulviews
    @valubaulviews 2 месяца назад +1

    I’m waffling between feeling called out, feeling attacked, and feeling seen. My favorite part is the pairing tasks as I came upstairs to put laundry away after the time management video and told myself, “you can watch the next video while you put your laundry away!” I feel synchronized, now for the rest of the video…

  • @mrpositronia
    @mrpositronia Год назад +1

    Schools need to know this stuff. I believe my school life was extremely hampered by this.

  • @michellewalsh7369
    @michellewalsh7369 3 года назад +69

    I like how you do a recap at the end. It helps!

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +16

      Great. It was a lot of stuff and I thought it be helpful to pull it all together in a succinct way. 😊

    • @megrocks3026
      @megrocks3026 3 года назад +2

      @@DrTraceyMarks That was really nice. Really made me feel like you understood ADHD. Towards the end of the video, I was looking for a comment writing down what you talked about because I already forgot some of it so it was great that you did that yourself

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +5

      @@megrocks3026 Thanks. I've been trying lately to summarize what I say at the end. I'm glad that was helpful

    • @27s
      @27s 3 года назад +1

      @@DrTraceyMarks It is definitely helpful. I would love if you could do the same thing in the beginning, too. "Today, we're going to talk about the following strategies." Then say what they are, and recap at the end.
      I find this helps because it's kind of like giving me labelled boxes, telling me what goes in them, and then verifying that I put things in the right place.

  • @GeeSmith333
    @GeeSmith333 2 года назад +4

    My reward has been sleep, mostly because I'm tired all the time. I say "Okay, let's get this done so we can get back in the bed."

  • @killerpussy84
    @killerpussy84 Год назад +3

    The 'doing task A while doing task B' is extremely good advice.
    I can't really prioritize, and rewarding doesn't work with me. So rewarding myself is out of touch for me, but doing it like this, co-tasking, that might work.

  • @Double303
    @Double303 2 года назад +3

    Love having to rewatch this 3 times to retain it...

  • @user-tg9fh4jg6w
    @user-tg9fh4jg6w 5 месяцев назад +1

    Спасибо что всю суть видео даете за короткий промежуток времени. Нам людям с СДВГ сложно смотреть часовые ролики. Очень полезное видео

  • @dirtydirtyshisno7284
    @dirtydirtyshisno7284 2 года назад +28

    I have about 16+ pages to write before the 13th, and I'm so stressed that I've felt sick all day and it has made it very hard for me to get anything done. This problems are real, your struggles are valid, you aren't crazy, you aren't lazy, you aren't lesser than anyone else, you can do it, whatever it is, however bad it is, you've always gotten through it before right? You've made it this far in life, it's hard but you can and will do it and you will come out a better person for it. Now time for me to take my own advice, thank you for reading and get back to work lmao

  • @Childoftheking89
    @Childoftheking89 3 месяца назад +2

    Game changer for me has been listening to RUclips videos while doing my chores. Audiobooks are another great thing for me. Makes the task go by so fast.

    • @Tamaresque
      @Tamaresque 5 дней назад

      I never thought of that. There are so many podcasts that I am sure would be interesting, but most people talk too slowly to hold my attention, and I get bored and just stop. But listening while I do stuff could be a really good combo! Thanks!

    • @Childoftheking89
      @Childoftheking89 5 дней назад

      @@Tamaresque you can speed up videos on RUclips!

  • @auser184
    @auser184 3 года назад +69

    I don't have ADHD, and I know this difficulty must be amplified in some people as a result of having the condition. However I do have bipolar, and I still very much suffer from being overwhelmed by tasks--I have observed that often people don't start tasks (especially creative ones) due to a fear of failure. But for me it is almost ALWAYS about being emotionally and intellectually overwhelmed. I am often frightened by the idea that I may end up in a manic episode during the course of completing an emotionally and intellectually stimulating task, or that I may end up not being able to finish as a result of becoming depressed (and thus thinking that the only reason I came as far as I did was because I was manic, which is obviously not always true or fair to think). Thank you for this breakdown of tips and methods that we all can use to cope with this obstacle, no matter the extreme.

    • @nah_.
      @nah_. 3 года назад +8

      I heard that 60-70% of people w/ bipolar disorder also have ADHD

    • @ceaser500
      @ceaser500 2 года назад

      @@nah_. I was just gonna say that

  • @drearyrie
    @drearyrie 3 года назад +55

    As someone diagnosed with ADHD and struggling with focusing, I barely got anything on the video because of my focus problems, thinking I'm just multitasking with messenger and youtube when I completely lose focus with the video itself 🤣 I'm very thankful that I can repeat it multiple times and apply it in my life! Thank you so much for this, Dr. Tracey Marks.

    • @obgfoster
      @obgfoster 3 года назад +11

      I wish every conversation I have during the day was a youtube video, so I could rewind 10x if I need to!

    • @CutieYoli
      @CutieYoli 2 года назад +4

      i find that putting the speed faster makes it easier to focus on videos like this lol. I know people have to speak slowly and clearly but it makes my brain wander!

    • @NobleWolf33
      @NobleWolf33 Год назад +2

      Don’t let the ADHD control you, you are the mind, YOU are in CONTROL . Trust me focusing is hard but it’s not impossible….even though it feels like it

    • @drearyrie
      @drearyrie Год назад +1

      @@NobleWolf33 to lessen the frustration, sometimes you gotta admit that the lapses brought by the ADHD could really take control over you. but that's the reason why different coping strategies exist (as well as this type of videos, perhaps)-so you could regain your control, recognize patterns, and exercise mindfulness. it really is hard but never impossible :) thank you for your nice words! hope the best for you too

    • @mohamedanas1152
      @mohamedanas1152 10 месяцев назад

      @@drearyrie yes nothing is impossible

  • @markmuller7962
    @markmuller7962 Год назад +3

    I've been undiagnosed for 38 years and it's almost creepy listening to you perfectly describing all the strategies that I had to come up to in order to survive

  • @goldenlamb777
    @goldenlamb777 2 года назад +3

    As someone diagnosed with ADHD :
    I always watch video and read comments at the same time, while simultaneously thinking about a song for instance that I’m trying to play by ear. Even to get to the point to do or listen to something interesting you really have to PEAK my interest.
    Or I get hyper focused. Science, music. Can sit in the room for hours. And I was like this since I was a kid. And I have difficulty expressing exactly how I feel with words. With feelings is better.
    So forget organizing.
    If I think of weekdays in color not in order they come.

  • @BuddhaGhost
    @BuddhaGhost Год назад +11

    Watching videos like this are an aversive task for me. It took a lot of stress and self-loathing from lack of time management and a mountain of unfinished tasks to be willing to face the music like this. Thank you.

  • @user-nb2ub9hn8s
    @user-nb2ub9hn8s 2 года назад +5

    Writing down each task, how long it takes and all this stuff is literally the thing that I procrastinate and find it so hard and time consuming for me. At this rate I think I'm just looking for excuses to be a failure haha.

    • @sprcow
      @sprcow 11 месяцев назад +1

      Agree. I hate doing these planning activities

  • @malinpetersson4182
    @malinpetersson4182 2 года назад +21

    I've thought about and tried rewards and combining unpleasant tasks with pleasant tasks/hobbies to get things done, but I have never realized that "just pushing through", like you said, reinforces the feeling that unpleasant tasks are in fact unpleasant. It makes so much sense! I will definitely try to implement that

  • @eli-eli1
    @eli-eli1 2 года назад +10

    Recap/summary starts at 7:03.

    • @missmi365
      @missmi365 Год назад +1

      For the ADHD people 😂 .. like me

  • @Thomas-pq4ys
    @Thomas-pq4ys Год назад +2

    Having a "planner." Dr. Marks, that truly is laughable in my ADHD fog....
    I have file cabinets. I carfully file things, then, "out of sight, out of mind" kicks in. I not only forget where they are, but I forget that I even have this info to begin with. Going into these files is like an archeological dig.
    I need a manager.
    I find it interesting that those who teach organization, are already highly organized, and it is completely natural for them to do so. They haven't any idea how to teach my ADHD self how simply begin to becoming organized.
    Next is maintenance. Being ADHD means starting from scratch, every day. Like my above bit about filing. Every day is a blank slate. I have to find my to-do lists, if I made them at all...
    I have cats. They come first in my day. From then on, it is going for whatever I see needs doing first, but I get distracted, and end up doing a half dozen other things, some of which must be done, like music rehearsal, cleaning up my messy workshop, getting my van inspected, preparing my gal and my bicycles for the season, yard work.... I could go on and on.
    I appreciate your channel... but have a hard time putting it into practice... I think you call this executive function...

  • @ReginaldMcPherson
    @ReginaldMcPherson Год назад +13

    You are amazing. Even your videos are not distracting, to the point, void of fluff. Even the way you speak, you validate our struggles with understanding. Thank you. The world needs more of you!

  • @blandinepoirson6156
    @blandinepoirson6156 3 месяца назад +2

    I am a fivty year old french woman diagnosed with adhd 5 years ago after struggling for years to look normal and productive and it all ended up in Burnout and depression.
    I am on metylphenidate (only treatment available in France). It's effficent. Not miraculous neither.
    I also nees tip for organisation and daily life. Most french professionnal doctors don't have time to it and their advice are not generally accurate.
    Thank you for your channel, I suscribe.
    Sorry for my english speaking mistales, i am not english seaking.

  • @sickozzz8949
    @sickozzz8949 3 года назад +72

    I'm struggle very much with school and online learning is kicking my butt. Thank you for the video Dr Tracey Marks

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +35

      You're welcome Sicko. The online learning is so hard for so many people. It pains me to see my son struggle with it.

    • @toobossforchuck
      @toobossforchuck 3 года назад +3

      Same, online learning is so hard, there's no structure

    • @chey3145
      @chey3145 3 года назад +2

      Online learning? More like zoning out and watching tiktoks with my camera off while contemplating why I'm even paying for this

    • @beebuzz959
      @beebuzz959 2 года назад +1

      I actually did decent with online classes because we had deadlines and structure. We had to respond to at least two people in class, publicly. And comment on assignments publicly too. Then we had weekly assignments to turn in that were based on the other assignments too. So they've kept me in tune.

    • @lynellbohannon5191
      @lynellbohannon5191 2 года назад

      @@beebuzz959 I did ok with online learning, same set up as yours but it offered NO TIME for anything else. 2 cited assignments every week, respond to 2 classmates on their 2 assignments and then every other wk a paper was due. I transferred out.

  • @loveydoveywomanH20
    @loveydoveywomanH20 3 года назад +29

    Still figuring out how to exercise while I sleep. Lol

    • @cindyski4413
      @cindyski4413 3 года назад

      Good one! 😃

    • @jamiejones8508
      @jamiejones8508 3 года назад

      Haha! I can’t answer that one...but I can recommend an under desk treadmill for working whilst you walk :)

  • @altheaunertl
    @altheaunertl 3 года назад +6

    My therapist has been extremely helpful for me in figuring out things I need to do every day and how to remember to look at my to do list. A good therapist can be really helpful for these sorts of things.

    • @DrTraceyMarks
      @DrTraceyMarks  3 года назад +1

      Very true I’m glad you have a helpful therapist 👍🏽

  • @Traumatized_Mel
    @Traumatized_Mel 10 месяцев назад +3

    I appreciate how you mentioned not using food as a reward. My parents did that and well I stopped eating bc I couldn’t get the things done to earn my rewards. Don’t worry I got treatment and am doing better. In fact I started nursing school today and am using your videos (on this play list) as rewards for each online assignment I get through. 😊😊

  • @relentless3727
    @relentless3727 3 месяца назад +1

    Dr.... You really are super! I am from India and I have suspected that I have adhd. Though I have never been diagnosed, but as a person who really has 0 time management skills, and never seen to have enough time on my hands, I really appreciate your videos. I have made notes from your videos, and will implement them as soon as I finish this playlist.
    Thank you once again!

  • @variyasalo2581
    @variyasalo2581 Год назад

    I had difficulty following the video so I'll watch it again. I get lost reading the comments while the video plays. I have one org tip: set out clothes; group together in the fridge any needed breakfast items, set out utensils, dishes; stuff to take to work (or put in vehicle afternoon/night before); set up animal food. Pre plan and prepare for the next day. It helps me keep on time tremendously. Have a separate notebook for your 'to do tomorrow' items and put a second copy in/on your vehicle where you will see it. Less to remember, even if you have to add updates later, you got most of it written down and handy. Any more motivation tips would be great! Thanks for all you do. It makes a difference in our ADHD world.

  • @funeralangel8262
    @funeralangel8262 3 года назад +11

    🌿 I think people who are consistently depressed don't do things they need to do. They shut down.

    • @wl415
      @wl415 3 года назад

      Yup

  • @albertcassler8763
    @albertcassler8763 3 года назад +3

    Oh thank you Dr ....you are a real life saver...I'm 70 and my add son is in his 40s....these videos are making pur lives so much easier...I will always say to myself that I love my son for who he is, with God's grace of course...💝

  • @jamesbryson9542
    @jamesbryson9542 9 месяцев назад

    Hallelujah, Tracy is here to save us! 🙌

  • @valq10
    @valq10 3 года назад +19

    Also I love how specific your examples are (ie "watch an episode of Westworld" or "shop for my Mediterranean diet"). You're so watchable! Earned a sub x

  • @annag467
    @annag467 Год назад

    O wow. Food as a reward is how I became 40lbs overweight over the pandemic. Good rewards for me are online window shopping, a TV episode or stand up comedy I like, or a tasty healthy lo carb item, plotting a 3 day weekend road trip, watching a nature documentary, calling a friend, cleaning my van...good stuff for me.

  • @mudswallow5074
    @mudswallow5074 Год назад +5

    For me, it's 1. Lack of motivation exacerbated by depression; and 2. Feeling overwhelmed (with a huge emphasis on the second). Once I get going, I can focus like a laser for days unless I get distracted. The time log and planners feel very overwhelming, but if I can get started I'll complete and follow through like a rocket scientist as long as I'm not disrupted. Of course, nothing else will get done while I'm working on the log and planners. So doesn't work; story of my life.

    • @Tamaresque
      @Tamaresque 5 дней назад

      Make time to buy or download the planners. Then it will take about 10 seconds to mark what time you start, and another 10 secs to mark when you stop.
      Then make time to look at the info and make sense of it.
      The big lesson I've learned it to MAKE THE TIME. That applies to anything.

  • @lotusluciditys3rdrealm
    @lotusluciditys3rdrealm 6 месяцев назад +1

    I've been on ADHD medication since I was 10 years old and yet, 35 years later, I STILL NEED these tips & strategies. 😅
    I deeply appreciate the clear approach that you maintain in all of your videos. Thank you. 💖

  • @melifever
    @melifever Год назад

    Going through my file cabinet, doing laundry, getting my place in order - these are some aversive tasks for me.

  • @adrame7077
    @adrame7077 2 года назад +1

    You’re not Dr. Tracey Marks.
    You are Dr. Tracey Marks Lifesaver.
    I have no words. With this series of video, for probably the first time of my life I feel understood and I have hope for myself.
    Thank you. Like so so much.

  • @sicilyny5375
    @sicilyny5375 2 года назад +4

    Hey ..I know all this, used it all for my son with ADHD, as a child, and it worked.
    Now it's time to use it .For Me!!❤️

  • @dumbtch-lk5yr
    @dumbtch-lk5yr Год назад +1

    i don’t even have ADHD i just find myself needing this advice

  • @Shadow-iv1mq
    @Shadow-iv1mq 2 года назад +1

    I don’t have ADHD but I do get overwhelmed with tasks and struggle to get motivated, this video was a godsend!

  • @UberCletus
    @UberCletus 3 года назад +9

    Also when something feels too big and undefined (unsure of what to actually do to start and finish the task).

  • @therudimentroom
    @therudimentroom Год назад +1

    So much of what you are saying resonates with me, but one of the points you made really made me feel like at least one thing I do, I do right. When I have to fold laundry I ALWAYS throw on a Netflix show, and before you know it, LAUNDRY IS FOLDED! Negative thing (laundry) at the same time as positive thing (Netflix) = Accomplishing one of the many debilitating tasks we all have to do. (edit, I literally wrote this right before you said to watch TV while folding clothes, LOL)

  • @angusmorrison9433
    @angusmorrison9433 Год назад +4

    I’ve watched 3 of Dr. Marks’ videos over the past hour. I needed this assistance. I’m 68 and still dealing with grief/loss of a loved one. Added on top of the ADHD I’ve had a terrible time taking care of things needing attention and certain family members keep nudging or asking me why I have such trouble staying focused and r accomplishing tasks. Truly, hours pass like minutes. I don’t mind that except I’m not getting anything done. This was most helpful and I think I’ll share with my family -and explain when they ask me why I haven’t done something yet I can tell them -this is what I want to say.

    • @Tamaresque
      @Tamaresque 5 дней назад +1

      I am the same as far as time goes. I tell everyone I meet that I have no understanding of time.
      Also, and I don't know if it's related, I can't judge distances, as when someone asks me how far away something is, or the measurements of an object.

  • @rocketrollsvlogs7625
    @rocketrollsvlogs7625 2 года назад

    Pushing through can reinforce the negative experience.... Wow!!! That's my life.

  • @milcaful
    @milcaful 3 года назад +6

    In 'normal life' I did not struggle with being productive and meeting deadlines but this corona lockdown, working and studying from home has really impacted my focus and time management. This video helped a lot, and I am planning to stick with the four task categories of Important/Urgent. Thank you so much Dr. Marks !!

  • @katherinestahl7641
    @katherinestahl7641 3 месяца назад

    Watching this series as a therapist who struggles to keep up with documentation and when you used insurance claims as an example I felt so “seen” 😂 I do them on the couch watching reality TV- it’s a struggle

  • @stojanchica
    @stojanchica 2 года назад

    This woman is an angel. I keep listening until I adopt the advice subconsciously.

  • @markmears7447
    @markmears7447 3 года назад +2

    I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child or young teenager but I haven't been on any meds or nothing as an adult and I'm 42 now and one of the problems I have is when I got to get stuff done like I'll run through it in my head what I got to do and I like get stuck in my head doing that instead of actually getting it done and when it comes to actually getting up and doing it I'm wore out because I've been stuck in my head forever

  • @blessednhm
    @blessednhm Год назад

    I love how you added the recap at the end because I already started to forget the points you made prior. Its as of you read my mind lol

  • @hpstorian
    @hpstorian 3 года назад +2

    These videos carried with them a thrill of recognition. 30 years of ADHD gave me some of these habits but not all, and recognising them was as validating as discovering them was useful.

  • @totoro-chan7700
    @totoro-chan7700 3 года назад

    Thank your for making this video, Dr. Tracey!

  • @sarablessington8309
    @sarablessington8309 3 года назад +3

    Great companion to Pt 1. Can’t wait for the rest of the series. Thank you for creating them.

  • @wilaustu
    @wilaustu 2 года назад +1

    My mom had me tested for adhd as a kid and I didn't have it, but I still feel very spoken to by all these videos.

  • @deefee701
    @deefee701 3 года назад +6

    Thank you Dr Tracey. I work with ADHD sufferers but now I've noticed that im more aware of my own tendancy to procrastinate, eat too much sugary treats and avoid difficult tasks I know I hate. I'm learning that I'm a perfectionist too. But I think I can learn to help me so I can help others. Thank you!

  • @tanyamcdowell833
    @tanyamcdowell833 2 года назад +1

    Very helpful to have a professional explain the root cause of procrastination..

  • @rottenblossomco
    @rottenblossomco 3 года назад

    Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU. This advice is so incredibly helpful.

  • @Noychooz
    @Noychooz Год назад

    This video makes me realize I have unrealistic expectations from myself. There's just too much to be done. I think my problem is more about learning to prioritize , and having strategies to actually exceute my priority, reather than acting on impulses. To me, everything is important. A clean house, college, work, nutrition, self development, exercise. There's just.. not enough time in the day

  • @ericsantos5078
    @ericsantos5078 3 года назад +2

    Your videos have been such a help for me. Thank you for giving your time to all of us.

  • @QueenShiva1920
    @QueenShiva1920 3 года назад +4

    This was a whole word this morning! Thank you!!

  • @alessandracastano9080
    @alessandracastano9080 Год назад

    WOW, thank you Dr Marks

  • @Cleopatv
    @Cleopatv 2 года назад +1

    The thing is with add as I have, anxiety and depression at the same time is so overwhelming is that you wake up when you are 40 and think your life doesnt matter and you just dont care anymore

  • @Simon-fu8sd
    @Simon-fu8sd 2 года назад

    it's amazing how every sentence come together to carry substance avoid misunderstanding, and clear up previous misconsepctions.

  • @kymberlydawn1445
    @kymberlydawn1445 2 месяца назад

    So glad i sought out this video. Very insightful

  • @yohue
    @yohue 2 года назад

    This is so clear and straight to the point. Thank you!!

  • @DragAmiot
    @DragAmiot 3 года назад +2

    You're doing important work. Thank you.

  • @EhlieLuna
    @EhlieLuna Год назад

    I truly appreciate your videos.

  • @tiffanygutierrez2962
    @tiffanygutierrez2962 2 года назад +1

    Im late to the party but started watching this video series and wanna say thank you for these. Being on YT itself is a huge distractor for me, found your vids on a random moment of scrolling. Sometimes tbh the content is overwhelming like the idea of making a list of timed tasks and then a time log, and ugh 🤯…but obviously that’s bc I need this material. So sincerely, thank you! I can understand now why although I’m always running around and doing stuff I’m often behind on tasks, forgetful of super important things and generally feel like I’m flailing. Again, thanks 🙏🏽

  • @rachelr4731
    @rachelr4731 3 года назад

    Dr. Marks,
    You are giving me hope. I appreciate you.

  • @aditisharma4797
    @aditisharma4797 2 года назад

    Thank you so much Dr. Marks! Your videos always help e so much

  • @smaaahen
    @smaaahen 9 месяцев назад

    I can’t count how many times I’ve watched this video to remember all the previous information you give , and I can’t thank you enough for this 🙏🏽

  • @dantarradellas7351
    @dantarradellas7351 Год назад

    Fantastic. Thank you.

  • @hlaback
    @hlaback 2 года назад

    Finally. Some tips that aren't general ass tips for pretty much normal lazy people. Some of us actually suffer and have to babysit ourselves through every minute of the day or else the day becomes wasted with nothing done on a deadline. It's so hard, but it makes me who I am. ADHD gives us lot of our cool perks actually so we should focus on that when we get frustrated. I wouldn't trade me for anyone!!

  • @neonglitch6618
    @neonglitch6618 Год назад

    Can't thank you enough for these videos😭😭 My life is literally going to hell because of undiagnosed ADHD and this content is really helping me to understand the way my fckn brain works lol. TYSM!!!

  • @tillycomedy2194
    @tillycomedy2194 3 года назад +1

    The importance & urgency segmentation is very helpful, thank you!!

  • @nadiacolbourne5878
    @nadiacolbourne5878 Год назад

    Thank you miss Tracey. You are an angel for making this channel. You are helping me so much and you break things down so understandable for people like me. Really people in general. Thank you from the bottom of my heart

  • @pedrocarara1830
    @pedrocarara1830 Год назад

    Tracey, thanks a lot for your videos.

  • @lynellbohannon5191
    @lynellbohannon5191 2 года назад

    Thank you so very much Dr. Marks. 🙏🏾♥️

  • @eloisemarie5219
    @eloisemarie5219 3 года назад +1

    Really helpful. Thank you. I needed these tips.

  • @OHT26
    @OHT26 5 месяцев назад +1

    Complete the task , And Leaving.

  • @shaunbond2107
    @shaunbond2107 Год назад

    Thank you for these videos! I can't begin to tell you how helpful this is

  • @DerangedMerger
    @DerangedMerger Год назад +1

    I'm doomed. My biggest reward for myself, for completing any task, is having that task done. I love that feeling. "Yes! I'm awesome! I took shower this week!" or "I'm so proud of myself, after 6 months, I finally changed my bedsheets". Things like that are a very great award for me.
    If I ask my self, what I'd rather be doing... The first thought is "nothing". The second thought is "actually no, not nothing, I'd rather like «not existing»".
    Ps. I am under professional medical supervision, I do take my antidepressants, mood stabilizers, antianxiety drugs, and of course adhd drugs, as well as other prescription drugs, for my other ailments.
    Ps2. I can't afford professional therapy nor psychotherapy, nevertheless I keep trying to help myself, by watching videos made by professionals like you, dr Tracy. They are very helpful.
    So thank you for all the knowledge, you share with us.
    It is quite hard to find someone on youtube, who provides, not only reliable EBM information, but often adds most recent findings from the scientific publications, moreover - using clear and understandable language :)
    ❤‍🩹

  • @jvirg606
    @jvirg606 2 года назад

    Enjoy your straight to-the-point videos. No nonsense. Thank you for providing me useful information and staying on topic.

  • @mercydamilolaoguntade5938
    @mercydamilolaoguntade5938 11 месяцев назад +1

    Dear Dr. Tracey, your videos are really helpful.
    Thank you so much. 🙏 Please don't stop. 💙

  • @neffk
    @neffk 7 месяцев назад

    Great videos. Interesting content. Lots of ADHD content seems to be made by women for women. This has more of an expert medical tone, which I appreciate. Perfect delivery, too. I've listened to a million informational videos and this is really good. The content is neither too brief or loquacious. Your speaking voice is even without being put-on or monotone. 5 stars.

  • @graceoartyo
    @graceoartyo 2 года назад +2

    This has got to be the most helpful video on the topic i’ve ever watched. I never (consciously) thought to pair pleasant tasks with unpleasant tasks, i always thought the best way to do it was to chunk all of my unpleasant tasks together so i could get them out of the way- but this makes sense! i always enjoy my hobbies more during the school week than on the weekend because of the contrast. thank you for making this!

  • @evanoliver68
    @evanoliver68 Год назад

    I have recently come across your channel. There is a lot of great information here, thank you. Doing something for a reward might be helpful in the short term once or twice but to build a habit of doing something I think you need to have an intrinsic reason for doing it.

  • @Kespin2
    @Kespin2 Год назад

    You are speaking my language! The scenarios you talk about is exactly me in every situation. This helps so so much! Thank you!

  • @shobithshetty6034
    @shobithshetty6034 Год назад

    Thank you Doctor.