The best mid max is to farm a lot of income initially with a good job, and then rent a girl for a girlfriend experience whenever you want. Minimum effort if you gain a lot of money, and maximum result because you get to have those good experiences with women without having to go through "20 quests a day".
@@Yggdrasill8 I'm sorry I failed that one, ingot an error message saying I needed 50 years of experience. T'was a good entry level job too, almost paid twice the minimum wage.
@@Thecultofwrestling 20% isn't a huge percent. people don't date single moms for a reason, so they probably are fine with cutting off 20% of their options if its options they don't want.
@@Thecultofwrestling lets be real theyre all a bunch of pssies terrified to have to actually put effort in theyre relationship just because she has kids doesn't mean you get to be a little btch and duck her just to turm around and act like a victim
(imo) "Incel" feels like shaming someone for doing something 'involuntarily.' Most people desire a real partner, who is loyal, loving, and shares common-interests (a true partner in life). Society is very broken and men are coping with the realities of modern relationships the best we can (epic levels of misandry baked into the entire system) and that means many are in a state of permanent loneliness... gaming (with related bad habits) is a way to medicate, kill the loneliness (a vicious feedback loop). Not all of us want to go to clubs. Some just want a low-drama life. Think many men have given up. NOTE: Was married 18 years, till wife's death.
Nailed it. 33 single since I’ve been an adult. I haven’t given up… just refuse to lower the standard of the way I carry myself and that seems to scare them all away. The loop effect you speak of resonates with me tremendously. I tell myself that everytime a new wow expac comes out and I binge it for months. It’s cope and I know it but have accepted it.
The problem you have is you take this personally. Guys literally do this all the time, they joke about wanting girls with big titties and some even make jokes about girls with small boobs. So the "insulted" part is probably just joking around, and the over 6 foot thing is a preference which is 100% okay and valid to have lol.
@@viserus_ When the guy does it, he gets fired for making female coworkers "feel unsafe" around him, even if he wasn't talking to them. Happened to one of my coworkers.
@@TheBayzent so when you reported this what did your boss do? Your failure to follow up doesnt mean theres an equality issue here. You just didnt say anything lol. The mental gymnastics is insane
+viserus I never thought about it that way. You may be on to something about it being joking around. But a girl wanting a guy to be over 6 feet is like a guy wanting a girl to no more than 120 pounds, shallow standards that are set by hypocritical people.
@@thevigilant6884 in this day and age the dating pool is so big, you can set loose preferences like that, instead of "settling" for lack of a better word with someone outside your preference. It may seem shallow to some but when you are dating to marry and not for fun you want to find someone who fits your attraction profile first
@@virtual240 The secret is to know the right people and have multiple advantages over everyone else but that doesn't help the people at all who don't have those advantages and the people who DO have those advantages DON'T NEED help. Good luck career dude I hope something becomes a good opportunity for you my dude.
@@virtual240 Sometimes you can get the job without experience, most employers demand vacancy just because they're not sure what they want from a man. My employer had put up a 3 years of experience in the vacancy but hired me (with not a day of exp) just after a 5 minute talk.
sucks that just cus a fraction of men r weird and creepy there are girls who dont want nothing to do with them. so now everyones just trying to play it too safe
@@reformed_attempt_1 definitely don't do that. they launched the whole metoo movement to prevent that. women even tried to make that a felony in new york. DO NOT do that.
This isn't true in every scenario. When you hear women say this its in reference to not wanting to be approached by a random stranger while they're going about daily life. Tho if you approach a woman in a social setting and introduce yourself and see how things go in that context women are generally more receptive.
I'm that 1% of men that aren't ugly because they're fat or going through puberty, I'm just truly ugly because of a severe facial deformity. I was bullied throughout high school and can't function in social situations because I know people are staring at my deformity. I had girls tell me to my face that I'm ugly so its safe to say my chances of having a meaningful relationship are slim to none.
Sadly our society is based on looks and status, but that doesnt means that out there is a special person waiting to share beautifull moments with you, keep grinding and improving yourself (studying, reading, working out and talk to people) nobody is ugly, we are just different and special on our own ways, we must find what we do best and go for it, much love from Uruguay and dont stop the grind
@Demetter I'm not going to sugarcoat anything, I have a dental deformity and honestly all you can do is either get surgery to be accepted by society(you never will be) or accept that the world is unjust and you will be unfairly treated no matter what There are however some people who will judge you based on your character and not how you look, they are rare but they do exist
Bro us INCELs need to start making BANK and start controlling the narrative. Start TECH companies and own Social media. Get in Politics. That way we can influence change. Because until such time as we do. We will FOREVER be the butt-end of jokes.
@@hunger4wonder Most of the "ugly" guys I've seen dating attractive girl are just overweight, they have very average features. I get treated like I have special needs when I go out, that should tell you how bad I look.
The worst part of this: half the time when I ask a girl out she looks at me like I'm doing something I'm not supposed to. Like I should feel ashamed that I dare be interested in someone.
not only they, the group, like coworkers, classmates, group of friends, they all behave like if you commited a crime. but if one of the good looking guys do it, they are all happy. it's like if you are an average guy, you are baaaaad if you dare to even ask out a girl. even if you are the most respectful, polite, and say the same things or bette things than what the "good looking guys" do. they can do and say harsh things but they all laugh about it and there's no problem, but you ask somebody out in a polite way, and the whole group of friends is angry at you.
Coming from someone who used to be incredibly socially awkward who became more comfortable over time, I honestly think that level of attractiveness is not really the thing at play.I think that the more important factor is understanding/social awareness of a particular situation. It might be an annoying answer, but a lot of times you need to just understand the vibes whenever you're with someone, and there are times where you think things are looking good with someone in terms of chemistry and they are, but the vibe isn't suggesting a desire for romantic chemistry. It's kinda like the phrase of "they're like a brother/sister to me" that I'm talking about. I had made that exact mistake once and I learned from it, because at the time I hadn't been in a relationship and didn't understand that the social cues for when someone is interested in you is different (doing therapy also helped me with these things). I have the belief that anyone can physically make themselves look like a seven at the very least with good enough self care, and anyone who would reject a seven just on looks alone isn't someone you would likely enjoy dating anyway. Just make sure that you are a generally pleasant person to be around and put yourself out there and you'll almost guaranteed find someone who mutually resonates with you.
@@zzane4677 No it's not. For someone who wants to talk about social awareness, you sure made a long ass comment nobody's going to read. People always have excuses, it's just halo effect.
Im an incel but im not lazy or socially awkward, i work 2 jobs and people like me, as a child i often got praised for being mature for my age and well manered. But being bullied at school and abused at home without a single person helping me makes me feel like im not even human. Every social interaction is just theatre and i cant form bonds with other people
Yeh. Hard to go through that, then graduate to being called 'creep' 'stalker', or some other insult just because you tried. You have to endure so much and receive no protections, then you have to instantly perform at a very high level and are disposed of if you aren't good enough. On an unrelated note, the fembots might finally be nice, if you can deal with the artificiality of it all.
Oh, I'm not afraid of rejection... I'm afraid of being labeled a creep because I'm an introverted below-average looking guy hitting on someone I don't know.
Last date I had was a shit show. Was 19 or 20 and thought I found a unicorn basically. We loved the same movies, she liked the same vidya and we messaged back and forth for a few weeks, just nearly non-stop talking and I proposed meeting and having a cup of coffee, just to see if we get along the same in real life. We were both pretty excited. I get to the Cafe like 5 or so minutes early to grab a table, she messaged me that she just parked and on her way. She walks through the door with a toddler like 3 or 4 and sits down with the kid. I jokingly say something like is that your little brother and she just says nope, it's my son. She had never mentioned a kid before. Nothing in her bio mentioned a kid. I try to at least be civil and polite, she ordered drinks for herself and the kid as well as lunch for both of them. Almost 60 bucks just for them. I just got a coffee. She then had the gall to say "Hey, you're paying right?". I just left and over the next week I had to deal with calls, messages. I even had photos of me at the grocery store shopping sent to me because she spun a fucked up story to her friends so they keep harassing me. So nah, I'm good.
@@paz1514 exactly, it's as bad as using twitch emotes outside of twitch, I had a friend back in high school who would unironically say poggers, I still don't know what the fuck he was saying that for
"You're not going to play someone else's saved game" is a perfect way to put it. I was raised by a single mom. My mom and dad got divorced when I was like 18 months old. My mom only ever dated 1 other dude who ended up being a weirdo my entire life. she died when I was 23. Very very sad
It was, but then I think about all of the saved Pokémon games that I would load into and take all of their Pokemon. So in essence I have played someone else saved game 😂
@@thelegacyofgaming2928 Same. After my friend let me borrow his copy of Diamond and didn't ask for it back after a week, I looked up how to delete saves and made a new one.
I had never had a girlfriend before at 29 but after a particularly bad rejection I decided that I would no longer chase anyone and instead I would work on myself and let them come to me. I went on a diet, bought new clothes and stopped focusing on women. Within about 6 months of making that decision, a friend’s girlfriend noticed and set me up with a girl and she’s now my fiancée. The bottom line is that if you are not having success with women, the problem is not your height or the way you are pursuing them or society at large. The problem is you, stop chasing women who aren’t interested in you, and start doing things that make you feel good about yourself.
don't be awkward, don't be depressed, don't let failures affect you, get a better job, improve yourself... oh gee, i never thought that not being me could be the solution to all my problems, thanks dude!
It really isn’t though. There are resources available to you and most people can combat mental illness. He isn’t saying “just be happy 4head” he’s saying taking the necessary avenue to help solve your personal problems is important
Damn what Asmon said from 3:55 is literally me. Never dated during elementary school/high school/college and pretty much was just all into video games and anime since at those times it was literally the golden age of gaming along with the starting boom of the internet. And now I am just working long hours and have no concept of how to even start lol
Just go places. Find a public thing that caters to your interests and make friends. Just talk about the stuff that you like. I recently apologized to a girl for going off on Super Mario 64 Speedrunning and she said I shouldn't say sorry, and that she likes hearing someone talk about something they care about. There really is someone for anyone, man. As long as you're honest and don't have bad intentions with them, people like other people that they vibe with. You just have to find them.
yeah, It can be hard. I ended up with one during college. I think papa is right though. You have to put yourself out there, being introverted is a big hinderance, but really if you are extremely introverted it should be something you are working on, and going out in public is how you work on it. 2 birds, one stone. It's hard to give advice on which public to go to. If you happen to be religious i'm sure church would be a good one, even volenteering for activities afterward, but for me I would probably catch fire inside a church due to my many instances of blasphmy. Can volenteer at a local animal shelter if you like dogs, or cats. If you meet a single girl while volenteering for the doggos.. she is 1/2 way yours already ;) Also, not sure what age you are right now, but If you wait much longer than 25 a large portion of the women will have children, it's just science. So, you have to be okay with other dude's kids in the mix, get lucky and find a girl who doesn't have kids. If you wait long enough though, all hope is not lost. you get another great window at 35-45 when the kids these girls had early in life are now 18+ and out of the house. Just put yourself out there, let people know you are looking, sometimes people have a weird tick where they want to set people up together, it's like their life goal.. so just tell as many people as you can (without being super awkward lol) that you are looking, and someone will most likely answer too. Also, Papa is right about being yourself. Always plan for and play the long game. You are not trying to get in a girls pants once, you are trying to make a lifetime friend and partner. Do not lie, unless you are ready to make the lie reality. Playing the long game doesn't mean pressuring for commitment early though, as this could scare anyone off. Just let the relationship grow naturally.
find hobbies outside simple things like cycling gym/sports clubs or learn new skills going to meetups with people itll help you socially just talking out loud with them male or female literally do anything that means going into a group if you have any interests itll help
@@papahusky1263 HAHAHAHAHA pink view of the fking world. Luck and personal view do it all, it's untrue to say "there is someone for anyone" but it doesnt mean it's false either. "There is someone for the ones who search for it" is most what you mean to say, i would add "you got what you want to, from what you can have". Were all different, facing different problems, and having different needs, sometimes we doesn't even know anything about it all. Were just unequal at life, dont forget it.
Physically get out there and try new things. Classes, IRL meetups for Magic or other games, anime convention. You are capable of finding a quality girl- just get out there.
I found my wife at 30, and I was definitely at a point where I didn't care about the outcome anymore. I was pretty content with being alone, and while she was attractive and funny, if she liked me it would be a bonus, not something I NEEDED. I think that was a huge difference maker.
Something older men need to tell younger men, being single or in a relationship, you'll have relatively the same level of happiness. The question you need to ask yourself as a man is if the person you're with is worth the bullshit they'll force on you. I'm 29 now and I prefer being single. Some men want a relationship. For me though, I don't like emotional people, I hate having emotions foisted onto me, I detest being tracked ("Where are you" texts at 11PM when I'm out with friends for example) and after a while you realize that warm wet hole doesn't make up for the shitty entitled person who has it. At this point, she'd have to be 1 in a billion for me to consider a relationship. I'm going to be happy no matter what. I've got a good career, got my pit bulls, got my friends, got my hobbies. Sure, I'll battle spells of loneliness but I'd rather do that than deal with someone who probably needs an exorcism once a month.
@Darragh Sheehy i really don't get it. My friends tell me they wish they could make friends and talk to people(men and women) like I do, but it didn't work for me, I have many friends but my only lover is my right hand, no girl is interested, I'm not even ugly
@@darraghsheehy4455 Honestly, i've never been shy around women, i'm just not a very funny guy and i can't really carry a conversation for more than 5 minutes, this applies to anyone i talk to really. Most girls i've spoken to think i'm pretty good looking, but it never really works out because of what i mentioned previously.
Considering how many women these days have completely unrealistic expectations for what they expect from men, it makes sense why so many men give up trying to date. Less than 15% of men hit that magic status symbol of being at least 6 feet tall, yet so many women won't hesitate to say they only want to date men who are at least that tall. The longer you spend single, the less the shaming language from women about being an incel who plays video games all day means anything to you.
I'm 6'1", I attract plenty but my social skills = complete ass. Actually I have Autism and half the time can't tell that a girl likes me or not unless she made it OBVIOUS. Consequently I taught myself to just make an attempt, if she doesn't respond well just ditch her then and there. I don't have time to try "game" that I can never try have with my condition. I struggle just to appear normal in public despite adopting masking for 33 years before getting finally diagnosed with Autism. People would try to bully and shame me for being skinny as a kid and I wasn't tall at all until suddenly i had a huge growth spurt in 9th grade. Fast forward, I would graduate from HS with basically no skils or self esteem, definitely almost 0 confidence. First girls that acted interested wound up controlling my life for almost 3 years! Did me wrong, baby scare, cheating, lying, guilt trippin the whole narcissistic 9 yard yanno? Somehow, some way I'd find my way to my "obsessions" which were chemistry and music. I found confidence had come from knowing your capabilities or being willing to press it a bit. We lose confidence when we find we are wrong, but we gain even more once we can learn how to accept being wrong about anything. Then what's depressing? I'm finally figured it out and the other adults want to continue charades and lying all the time. I catch them and catch them in inconsistencies. The deflect and deny, project. Anything but ownership and I've learned they are bad news. Gaslighters must be defeated at all costs and we need to be the ones to do that.
so many unrealistic expectations for dating. social media got ppl thinking their partner needs to be perfect 100/10 as soon as they meet and ofc almost nobody is so u just got a bunch of lonely ppl trying to meet or achieve unrealistic expectations
@@JoseGonzalez-k6u Have you seen the videos of girls who honestly expect to find a man making $100k+ before he’s 25? They only want to be with professional athletes or entertainers apparently because unless he inherits his money or wins the lottery, the average man is not making that kind of money that young.
You can be hurt by the fact you are single, but never be mad at someone for having high standards. "People who are mad about someone having high standards just can’t reach them" As a small woman with not many curves, yes it sucks that many men want woman with big boobs and ass, but the thing is, it’s their preference. It hurts, but I don’t have the right to be mad at them or blame them for my singleness. That’s childish
@@jonispringer Very honest input from you here, and it takes a very mature mindset to say what you've said. You seem honest. While you might not be the "preference" that most men envision, I would go on to say you are worth it. Their preferences are superficial, and who needs a guy like that anyway? You would just be a notch in the belt, a tally to them anyway. It takes a lot of heart and soul(corny i know) but also in my opinion a certain form of intellect for a man or woman to realize that what they're seeking, is not to be lonely, they want to cherish and be cherished. If they can't realize that, then they wouldn't be worth anyone's time and are lying to themselves and others. I hope that you won't continue to hurt but rather find the positives in your life to focus on instead.
It's crazy seeing the differences between my high school experiences (2008-2012) and some of the experiences my friend's little bros are going through. None of us guys in my admittedly small (90 person) class would have been classified as incels (even the "nerdy" ones who didn't play a sport) - we didn't have crazy access to games/internet/Insta/TikTok (boarding school). Our relationships with the girls in our class were healthy. Just sad seeing schools today idk. Constant comparisons to what they see on Tik-Tok/Insta/Tinder.
If your not forced to deal with things at a young age... old dogs don't learn new tricks... and rejection is one of those... I wouldn't even classify most of those as incels as they voluntarily choose to never try
This video really sounded like it said, "You want a girlfriend? Change everything about yourself." I get it but fuck that. I am finding it more and more strange the stuff people do to find a significant other. I find it really hard to believe the rewards are worth the effort. That is even assuming you find someone. You could just fail the whole time at best. At worst you get tricked and lose half of your stuff in a divorce. "But when you find that special someone it is so amazing." Okay but, for how long? The odds seem low and the rewards are iffy.
@Coolerstetth.32I don’t know how people do it either, you literally have to be a god version of yourself and a narcissist to some degree just to keep people interested in you
@@jimijames6449 "No. Better yourself for yourself" correct "and you will find a better girl." incorrect and/or naive at best. but that's irrelevant anyways, since you should better yourself for yourself and not for the sole purpose of "gittn' sum'"
the leg lengthening one stuns me.. having been injured and been in a wheelchair, to voluntarily go through that, and never fully recover, just to maybe find a mid tier single mom is insane to me.. plus I'm a bit older to, 40 this summer..
the thing about saying just be confident is confidence comes from experience and from proving yourself by achieving great things. I only realize this later in life
Fax though. The amount of dopamine that would rush through my body whenever I completed a new music project I was proud of is insane, and provided a huge boost to my confidence
Oh my god yes. :'D It's basically he's saying some incel-ish and misogynist stuff, and feeding it to the watchers who want to hear it. That it's the women who are somehow ruined, not the men who can't get a date. Men like asmon probably know how to use desperate people and turn their problems even worse. Misogyny is created by men who want to get a lot of money out of other men. Desperate people want to hear those misogynists lies, he is their hero, he is the guy who makes them feel better and they agree what he's saying. But for real they just need to do the actual opposite what they're doing now to get some love from the ladies.
I just stopped caring what women thought about me. I told myself I would just do what makes me happy and behold, I now have a fiance. Doing what I loved gave me confidence and being able to share what I love gave me something to talk about. Do I still hate socializing? Yes. But I found a partner who has similar interest so I can enjoy life with them.
@@ArtisChronicles Then get used to being an incel hahaha. If you can't even do what he's talking about, which isn't nearly as hard as you might think it is, you're a very sad sad human being, and you'll never be truly happy, unfortunately.
I recognized from a young age that having a partner would drastically reduce the amount of time I get to play video games, so I decided to remain single. 31 years old now, still single, lots of money in my bank account and plenty of time to play games after work and on weekends. Living the life.
Do you think you will look back and be happy that you wasted years of your life to play video games that, no matter how much time you put into them, never tangibly increased the quality of anything that mattered in your life? And as the years go by, the reality of just how much time you wasted only builds in the back of your mind until it becomes a consistent reminder of the choices you've made. Do you think a successful person would be satisfied if you were one of their children? Who lived to escape lifes stressors and buy doordash for dinner instead of figuring out their place in the world?
@@raderT90 Bold of you to assume so much about him just from the comment he wrote. He mentions having lots of money in his bank account, so it's clear he must be employed and sufficiently successful at what he does, he simply chooses to spend his free time enjoying electronic entertainment instead of forming a family and that offends you.
@@raderT90 You think the whole Life turns around a relationship? Some ppl just don't have that interest and tbh I wish I was one of them - It would make life a lot easier
Was the same for me, I compared how I felt spending time with my friends to spending time with girls. The conclusion was that I overall got more enjoyment with friends, but it is more like a slowly drawn out enjoyment whereas with a girl, all the enjoyment was compressed into the bedroom fun, and then everything else felt like a chore (20 side quests a day).
I think a big part of how real life and online life are being blurred together is because kids are now developing their personalities online instead of in real life
Here's my MAIN issue with dating apps (as a female) and why I don't use them. As a woman, I feel the 80/20 divide and not in a good way. I'm not hot by any means, I am very much an average woman who is pushing middle age but the few times I have downloaded a dating app and made a profile, I have been bombarded by matches and messages from an unbelievable amount of men. I am talking nearly a hundred in the first night or two. It is so overwhelming and as someone who actually wants to read profiles and try to find someone who is a good match for me, it takes me time to respond to messages. However, if I don't respond within at least an hour of receiving a DM (sometimes WAY WAY less) then I get hit with angry messages about how I am just another stuck up b**** or ugly or fat anyway. It's unreal. I've maybe done it 3 or 4 times and it always turns out the exact same way and I end up deleting the app within a few days. I stick to dating men who I meet in person now, it's always a friend of a friend, someone who has been vetted by the people in my life. That is safer and a lot less stressful.
My issue is I can't find women my age where I live, and I get out a lot. I go to church often. I go to restraunts and stores and the only place with 20-something y.o. women is working at Zaxby's
@@HipsterKaren he's not, in fact he actually has a great point. she could limit the amount of people she has to interact with at once very very simply. however, i dont think it would increase the quality of the interactions by too much considering what the average male user of a dating app is like.
I believe it's the disconnect in a huge Society like the United States of america. There's a lot of people in this world who don't know anybody and kind of fall through the cracks of society. They are still there, they're working, their friendly, they're just not outgoing. There's probably a lot of them that aren't friendly also, but the point stands.
@Z let me ask you, do you have any statistics or factual claims that I made that you're disagreeing with? Or are you just commenting because you feel some type of way?
What a wunder! Feminists and the society has toxic thoughts on males and they get toxic to. That happens if you tell them that they are oprresive shits.
You use tinder because you dont even know a remotely attractive girl who is single. If you know one. The friend of the sister of your buddy. That chick from your side job. That friend of your niece. Then you have options. They know couples or people who aee unattractive. Or someone far outside their league. Most people have no options. The dont use apps advice is pedantic. It is for people without options. And Chad playas.
@Z hes not wrong that this is mainly a western thing. as someone from Indonesia, both men and women around the age of 19-25 in the college where i study is generally a virgin and theyre doing just fine without getting depressed. of course, this is mainly because of the fact that Indonesia is a muslim country so people are generally saving themself until marriage, and since they generally know people around them is probably a virgin too, they less likely to feel jealous or something like that. idk if jealous is the right word for it tho...
It is not society that grades you but the system. Society is only a facade. It makes you feel batter. Laws either work or not. Another thing is that there is a whole range of things that people don't regulate. Go figure.
@@user-jr2ue9nu6y that's my point, who cares what anyone else thinks, external validation is not needed, validate yourself choose your circle wisely and remove anyone who doesn't inspire/motivate/positive influence you
@@DaShikuXI I disagree, it starts with saying I don't have to accept the institution for my personal belief foundation. I love myself and accept myself and will continue to improve. It's totally fine to have a measuring stick to judge where you think you are but its 100% up to you to make that decision. I think we just need to be honest with ourselves if you're overweight and that bothers you, do something about it, if you're unhappy in your relationship do something about it, if you're not getting paid enough do something about it. I used to be homeless I came from nothing, I know it is extremely difficult but the choice ultimately is with ourselves.
About Polygamy (having multiple wives), the reason it went away is because on a societal level it's terrible. Women will flock to maybe 10-20% of men, leaving the average man without a wife, without children and without any real investment in civilisation. This is why polygamous societies are more violent and less productive than monogamous ones, because societies are driven by averages not exceptions.
Dudes just need to start wearing makeup to even the playing field. I'll tell you now I look a lot better with eyeliner just sucks to put on, lol. Get ya war paint on boys.
Single father of 2, my wife passed away 2 years ago. It's near impossible to have a woman take me seriously because I can't provide enough "attention" to them. Even providing every free moment possible with them. It's fucking heart breaking.
That's so freaking sad. On the bright side though that shows that you have a lot of committment and conviction, and what I hope for the other person to give a genuine try. What those women suffered, the same thing happens to men but in this I think women have more issues, from being unable to cope with attention. They need attention in order to feel like they are seen, heard and cared for which is something they need to work on. There is probably more to it than a youtube comment can properly reflect but on the face of it I see you have done nothing wrong. I hope you and your kids are doing wonderfully and that you'll find a nice partner that is more mature to match your own maturity.
some women admire a working single dad, and they may not be showroom gorgeous, but they will appreciate you and not make you create a fake persona. just give it time, these things pop up unexpectedly - maybe you bump into a lady at a supermarket and hit it off. you don't need to bring up EVERYTHING lol :) I can't speak for American women, but I always assumed guys have kids either in the side or in their car lol.
My dad is also divorced and lives away but wanted to keep supporting his kids (me and sibling) and said she didn't force him to leave us behind our anything and respected it Seems it was all bullshit since he left us not too long ago to pursue a life with her
AIM was instrumental to my game with girls when I was in middle school and high school. It was the perfect way for a relatively shy kid to talk to girls I went to class with before breaking the ice in person. It simply made physically breaking the ice no big deal, as you got to know each other on a more personal level before that step. I feel like being in high school between 2001 and 2005 was basically the perfect time technologically to socialize. Everyone was available, but not overly so since Facebook was not out yet. We had the convenience of today's social media without the over use, dependence and digital public history attached to us. It was used as a stepping stone to the ball game instead of being the ball game itself.
Agreed and it was 'new' so it was either cool or weird lol. Now its soo common, people use it as part of their daily game and women have build shields on it... putting shy guy in an even more shy prison. Also, alot of guys dont learn much from male figures, and we are pushed in front of our screen... while girls they have social skills biologicially integrated.. making it more hard for guys who don't develop social skills.. like the job/experience reference. Social media makes guys incel (sexless tripled and depressions doubled) and girls go crazy (their mental health deteorization went up too the roof, self harm increased by 300% over 10 years)
I wholeheartedly agree with both Asmon and Cole on this. My issues are three-fold: 1. I'm still getting over the fact my ex emotionally abused me. I understand not all women are like her and that she was a bad person. 2. I'm still getting over one of the worst rejections I ever had from back in high school where said girl gossipped about me and tried to socially ruin me (had someone looking out for me that shut that shit down) after I had tried and failed to ask her out. The funny thing was, I understood what I did wrong and was trying to learn from it; the rumors came two weeks later from her. Second place goes to a girl at my first high school who actually successfully "cancelled" me before that was a thing on false pretenses (where I hadn't even intereacted with her) to the point where I lost all of my friends I had since 2nd grade, became a social outcast, and had to move schools states away to escape it. That one was... particularly brutal. 3. Age. At the time of writing this, I'm 32. It's become extremely difficult to figure out this on my part. Bar scenes aren't my thing and I suck at it even with a wingman. If there are women at my workplace they sure as hell aren't on my team and other teams don't interact with one another too often if at all. And because of the above point, I don't want to get my life destroyed by someone because I happen to choose to speak with the wrong person. Don't know if that's an anxiety thing or something that's unresolved. Before someone says to see a therapist, it's... in the works.
I'm also 32. And honestly, I can literally FEEL like I'm in my prime. Don't get me wrong, I get it, you've been through a lot. But don't hide from it. Don't accept defeat, I know what rock bottom looks like. I've been there twice. The first time lasted maybe 6-8 months after being dumped out of a 5 year relationship. The second time... Well I used rock bottom like a fucking trampoline. And I understood... There will never be a single obstacle that I come across that will EVER knock me down like that again. I now revel in the challenge of overcoming whatever bullshit life has to throw at me. Bring it on. Here's the profound part. I had no idea that I'd become this person until shit tried to hit the fan the second time. Something just took over. A combination of determination, and a realization that "results" are a byproduct and we are NOT defined by them. The actions, choices and behavior's that you engage in on a daily basis, THOSE define you. If you focus on the future results, achievements or goals, you'll compromise the NOW. But if you focus on making the actions you engage in today as meaningful as possible, then meaningful results will follow.
Honestly the speaking thing is pretty valid, some woman really are weird and when you so much as look at them or talk to them they get mad and will make some false complaints, or on some places just what you actually did is seen as an issue. But most aren't like that, but you could always be the unlucky one so I dunno.
Jeez, the communication environment is really becoming toxic in US. I would say move to eastern Europe but we have a war going on here. Here women smile back at you if you smile at them and are actually pleased to receive compliments. There is no this "passive aggressive" bull like in US.
My dad was a biker, my mom was a teacher. They had to hide their relationship and even have her keep a separate apartment in her name even though they lived together because it would have been a scandal in the school district if their relationship was discovered, and this was in the early 80's.
That wasn't the 80s. that was just a bunch of losers judging your parents.... my dad was a biker and my mother was a 3rd grade teacher..... nobody cared.
proposed to my ex in Paris back in 2020, we didn't last the year...I focused on myself and work and ran into the woman of my dream. Im sitting here playing tarkov and I look to my left to see her playing hogwarts legacy and it just fills my heart because I didn't think she existed
👊 married my college sweetheart and got divorced while I was in Afghanistan in 2012. Working on yourself always attracts what you’re looking for. I went from 16% BF to 11% BF that deployment…make them regret the decision bromo
Last girl I talked to. Had a lot in common, really good conversations. All that jazz. Nothing that indicated the red flags yet. Then like maybe a few days in. I shit you not. She texts me saying she has a confession. All I think is “here we go again…” This woman bruh. She confessed to being an escort and she didn’t even know why she was telling me this. But she wanted a baby and wanted me to be the father… So yeah. I’m gonna start looking abroad. This was just another wall in a cascade of fucking crazy.
I'm 42, and a virgin. And surprisingly, I am not bothered by it. Although I wanted gf when I was young, I lost that drive by the late 20s. And the major reason for that -- free contents. And seeing so many other men getting wrecked in the courts. I said, "Nope," and I was good. I'm so glad for it. Things have gotten so much worse, and it's probably gonna get even worse.
bravo, wizard. i myself am a sage. i see it here on my end as well, a coworker of mine is fighting his ex/ baby momma for any parental custody of his son. she falsely accused him of assault and never made a police report or any sort of public record saying that happened nor did she have any evidence. He's apparently guilty until proven innocent. according to child custody court and now the courts dock 70 percent of his salary for child support to which it goes to his baby mommas hair and nails and 30 percent of that money goes to the courts themselves as tax none of it goes to his kid and he still never gets to see his son. it has gotten worse and this is a common story. there's like 2 other my coworkers who been in it like that.
Problem is now if a man says a slight sexist joke he is misogynist and if a guy has been in a bad relationship and he says nasty things about his ex then he is called a incel.
@@MikePhillips-x6m Former part is true, but not the latter. Any man that women finds unattractive is an incel, according to many women. And that's at least 80% of men.
Also find it hilarious how little the pandemic affected us gamers on a mental health level… if anything it was our time to shine.. the introverted heaven.
I hit 60 on my shammy (classic wow) when lockdowns first started, got eye of rag same day I hit 60, and since I couldn't work at the time, I farmed all those hand of rag mats myself since I had nothing better to do 🤣. If it wasn't for covid I wouldn't have gotten my cool ass orange hammer, so at least theres that ha.
I’m noticing women aren’t appreciating or allowing men to have male spaces, humor, desires, or standards and that exists within relationships too. Always have to be careful that a woman can start to want to feminize many aspects of your life in negative ways (speaking from experience).
Ohh yah ! Once them gals start 'setting down roots' it's just the beginning. That's why one of my key Rules of Dating is NEVER taker her back to your place. Because once they see your stuff, THEN they can start getting 'ideas'...
In my late twenties I have come to realize that as an introvert who rarely ever goes out other than going to the gym or doing the groceries, and also isn't a handsome 6ft+ tall guy, there is just a lack of options for a lot of guys. As a guy if you're on the shorter side and not particularly photogenic, apps are a complete waste of time. On top of that, with so many jobs being work from home nowadays, if going out regularly is not part of your lifestyle you're just not going to ever meet anyone.
Cole seems to split up the male and female problems and ignores that they are related to each other. Sure, if society were great and women were mostly mentally healthy and interested in relationships then Coles take would be justified. He is in one section of society and looks at a different section of society. And then he says the other section should behave as he does and they are to blame for the lack of success. In a way he is right but also not really. Also by now the men and the women want different things from a relationship and they are taught by society to only focus on those aspects.
@@benrex7775 I agree with some of his arguments but he completely ignores the female factor. No matter how successful, outgoing or in shape you are....each woman has a dozen disqualifiers that reduce your chances and none of them are the same. You could wear the wrong shirt that day and that's it, you lost your chance. Women are in fact picky. I don't live online, I'm successful and in shape. Now It can be argued that I spend too much time working and not enough going out but guess what...If I don't work for that success I'm immediately disqualified. It's a catch 22 and I'm just not interested in dancing to anyone's tune like a performing clown so I opted out years ago.
Hobbies. I met my partner when neither of us were looking. We were just enjoying our lives and living our best lives. You cannot lose when you do things for you, even if you don't get a gf, you'd get a new hobbies and potentially new friends
@@wsrtwetr Wise words, but it has to be noted that you need to pick hobbies that allow you to meet people. I was super introverted and had plenty of hobbies, but I tended to always engage in solo hobbies.
"Looks don't matter, but they do." -Almost Every Woman Ever. That I think is part of the major issue, is 90% of the time a woman won't just tell someone who is interested they aren't interested in them due to looks. They instead keep saying looks don't matter to not be "rude," which then puts them in a spiral of thinking they have mental problems or it's something else to fix instead or working on the real issue.
It's not about not being rude. Saying someone's personality is shit is way ruder than saying they are ugly. The reason people don't tell the truth is all about avoiding looking shallow.
majority of incels just state the truth that they have a hard time finding someone when they're not what's considered conventionally attractive atm and people are "hiring after experience" while also saying being a virgin "doesn't matter". saying they're not liking women having freedom is heavily missconstruing what they're saying. it's like saying "oh you're lonely? so then you wanna force someone to marry you? rape them? you're a bad person" it's insane.
@@mealovesyu That logic is the same as saying "All f-nists want all men to die.". The fact that some do doesn't mean that's the opinion of them all or required for them to be one.
@@theworstcatholic7247 it’s the opinion of the vast majority and they don’t do anything to push back against this rhetoric. Comparing it to feminism won’t make me recant my statement.
30 years old virgin guy and never really cared about dating. I think people put too much pressure on themselves and think that if they dont / cant find someone to date or be with they feel like they've failed.
It's funny when people say self esteem is why we are incels. "Anything is possible if you just try or believe!" Alrighty then, I'm gonna start flapping my arms... Huh, I'm not flying. I guess this world has limits and not every creature can fly.
That's why you are responsible for building your own self esteem. Do things that you want that make you happy. Whether it's a hobby or something you are passionate about. That's how you build self esteem. Self esteem cannot be given to you and no amount of women can fix the problem you have with yourself.
We spend all day working, we spend all day in exclusionary social bubbles, our society is setup in a way that makes natural social interaction obtuse or non-existent. We use things like dating apps because were too busy to actually be able to go out and socialize like many people in other countries do. Dating apps turn dating into a competitive market place. Forcing people to turn them selves into commodities, products to be sold instead of human beings with emotions, interests, dreams, etc. We feel so disengaged with each other and society because it's being robbed of the human element. People have things to offer past their appearance and a few lines in a bio but we aren't provided alternative opportunities to do so.
What about cold approaching? I've never been that good at it but you've gotta get you're reps in somewhere. Even when you get rejected it still feels better to get how you feel off your chest than it does to just ignore it.
True, society doesnt help. However at the end of the day, you control your own actions. You can take different decisions in life, rather than going with the society. The thing is, it's alot harder
'you dont want to play someone elses saved game.' LOL i had a big laugh over this one. Never heard that comparison before, but damn is it funny and accurate.
Well then you can’t get mad if women say the same thing. If you can not date women because they’ve been with other men than others women can choose not to date you for the same reason. Or really any ransoms arbitrary thing you place ridiculous value on. Can’t get mad if a women says she doesn’t date short men because that has the same value as, a woman has been with other men.
Let's be real.. Saying shit like this is a big cope because they are invisible in the dating market anyways so men will say anything to justify not wanting to date women
The #1 rule is that if you find yourself crushing on a girl so hard you can't even communicate, you have to recognize that it will never be a thing and you have to mentally let that s**t go and MOVE ON. All relationships, platonic or romantic, start with communication. Practice talking and listening and the friends and partners will follow.
I find people are usually decent at the talking part, even shy people in 1 on 1 or small settings. It's more the listening part that people struggle with more today. No one tells anyone they need to shut up and just listen anymore.
I don't think there are many guys who are "too shy to talk to their crushes". There may be guys who act awkward in front of their crushes but the other thing is just a holywood stereotype.
It virtually never happened to me lmao. Never got to stutter or run away from someone out of love. Like, what fucking emotion or biological mechanism is running in your brain for it to malfunction? x)))
''If you're short, you're fucked!'' Me, as 5'3-5'4 guy: ''You know what? Single life is underrated. Not like I wanted kisses and hugs and cuddles or anything...''.
Imagine me I'm a Dutch guy, abroad I keep hearing. " Omg you're so short, I thought you all were 6'5" ( I am 5'9 ) My height never really bothered me, my friends are literally gigantic compared to me but idc. It does hurt e little that most people think dutchie are all giants
I had a woman who I really liked. Quite funny, intelligent(or so i thought), same morals/values for the important things for the most part. Great company, and was very intimate. She broke off the relationship after about 1.5 years because she wanted her first love to be the kind of love that the movies show. Where you bump into someone at a starbucks, and a glance or two is all you need to feel flustered. You start chatting over a coffee, exchange numbers, and you have a few dates in dimly lit restaurants, and the walks in the park at midnight together. a wild romantic life with travels and spontaneous romantic gestures like flowers, and picnics. That's pretty much what she said to me. It's been a few years, but it was clear she wanted a movie romance and to be treated like an absolute princess. I think she just never had the butterflies with me, despite really liking me. And she told this to me after she met a guy that did this to her. The twist to the story is that I knew this guy, he was abusive and volatile. Even told her and warned her, showing her his past criminal record(was in jail twice for a few weeks due to this) Was told I was just being jealous, and that she was a grown woman and could do what she wanted without me 'controlling' her. Within a few weeks she had moved in with him. Last time I heard from her was that she was in the hospital getting stitches. She had phoned me up to ask if I could pick her up. I declined. This led me to changing my mindset towards relationships permanently. If people are willing to throw away a year or two of a relationship with someone over something like this, I respect myself more than to let myself be subject to that, and I respect myself enough to not let myself be that guy who's always going to save her from her own choices. This guy has zero idea what's actually happening with dating these days. Yes, there's lots of guys who are undesirable for various reasons of their own doing, but so many men have checked out because of situations like this. You give dating a go 3 or 4 times, only to have someone doing something like this, or screaming at you, or freaking out over stupid things. Or who decline you when you start showing interest in them. The people in the dating pool in America are just awful. It's just a logical thing. If the relationship is too much work or stress, and it happens multiple times. Guys just check out eventually. Many men have given dating a try. But rejection after rejection after bad relationship just leads them to eventually check out. Most men are fine being alone so they'll embrace it. It's also why so many of these Men are going to other countries to find wives now, because what they value is drastically different than a huge amount of women in NA.
Some women can definitely have this effect on men, but that doesn't mean they are all like that. Just like how a woman might date someone like your friend and assume all guys are like that. It only becomes true if you give up and accept that it will always be that way. Truth is that it's not easy to find good people to have a relationship with, but they do exist and if you give up then you will never find them
@@padarousou I'm not sure the point of this. I didn't say that all women are like this, but after trying 5, 6, 7, 8 times and getting nothing but shit thrown at you. Most people just quit. Not worth the headache.
@@truckywuckyuwu In your post it sounded like you had a relationship with 1 bad apple and you said it "changed my mindset towards relationships permanently". If it gets that bad every single time, then it may be because you are contributing to it in a way you may be overlooking, or you are looking for relationships in the wrong places. Good people maybe hard to find, but there should be plenty of relatively normal people in between, they aren't all bad
Being short is like playing dating on nightmare difficulty, but in my experience that's the best way to play. I have been married to an absolute legend for over 12 years now and I'm so grateful that having to try harder meant I found someone less shallow.
5'4 here and married as well. Just cause you play on nightmare difficulty doesn't mean you can't beat the game, just gotta work harder and get luckier than most. I also feel that being less conventionally attractive allowed me to meet a better woman who loves me for myself.
@kalebisalwaysright Just because it didn't help you doesn't mean it doesn't help at all. You can still be socially re--tarded or have other problems. The fact is women do filter men out by height. You're like my tall friend, he still doesn't get any because he's basically autistic and doesn't know how to talk like a normal person.
Me when I have a girlfriend: "I wanna play vidya until 1am. I'm gonna be so bored at this event. I want my autonomy back." Me when I don't have a girlfriend: "I need cuddles and I love you whispers or I'm gonna jump off a bridge." There is no winning. I don't pretend it's anyone else's fault.
humans nature that"s all when you have something it became worthless with time x) thanks Lao Tzu to have said that 2500 years ago he knew how bad we are x)
Nah that’s not me it’s about balance lol. When you get a gf you gotta know what you’re signing up for. Healthy relationship: make time for yourself and your partner. That’s the key. One fault of human nature is how hard it is for us to truly compromise for others
@@MireValeCompletely true but, most of those people are disproportionately women. Men are just more likely to be single and childless for life. We all have around 2 to 2.5x as many female ancestors. Apart of the oppression of being a man is just the realistic possibility of never meeting anyone.
Bro this popped up on my feed at the worst time 😅 This made my day though. This hits too close to home. I've had a hard time with dating and relationships. I've gotten rejected and shut down and I've been so sad. I've gotta get out of my head and start talking to people again, and I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with this. I've also gotten therapy too which has really helped with my social anxiety. Focusing on my mental health has done wonders to my self esteem.
Metal health and getting to know yourself are very useful, but also realizing reject ain't shit really. When you realize you can just stop putting so much time into a build up to saying "hey I like you" and just do it when you know it, yeah, if you get rejected you have a whole lot less emotional attachment and you begin to realize there are "a lot of fish in the sea." Move on, find someone else, done.
Your not alone bro just coming back from the bar zero for 3 tonight it happens - But at least I didn't hook up with another Bi Polar girl I seem to be a magnet to them for some reason. And just some friendly advice if you do meet a Bi Polar girl just run in the opposite direction you will thank me for this advice...:)
If you haven't already, start exercising and I guarantee it will help with your mental health too. Being unhealthy compounds mental health issues. A stable sleep schedule, exercise, and eating healthy do wonders. I know it sounds cliché, but that's because it's 100% true
@@devon8363 Stable sleep schedule? I haven't had a good night's sleep in a long time. I haven't had a girlfriend in even longer. Gotta better myself, but right now I'm just focused on trying to get a job. It's hard out here for a lonely man with no tribe.
My youngest sister is tallish for a woman (5'9") and was very embarrassed/ insecure about it. She used to only date guys that were taller than her - and ended up dating douchebags. I pointed out that she was discounting a huge population of guys who might be kind and sweet and good partners based on something they couldn't control - just like she can't control how tall she was. Anyway - she got married last week to a very devoted short king! Sometimes perspective is all we need to make better choices.
Aaaw, good for your sis and her husband. I know that there are picky women out there, picky people in general, but people also don't realize a sort of guilt that comes with our insecurities when relationships are brought up. I myself have this sort of idea. Although I absolutely no experience with men, due to not being interested until college and not being anyone's type now, if by some miracle of God anyone does ever find some interest in me I would much rather the guy not be skinny because I am overweight. I am on a weight loss journey but that sort of thing takes time. I wouldn't want to project my insecurities of my weight onto anyone and being around a guy who is skinny would just make me look larger than I actually am and I would feel bad for him because there are plenty of skinny girls he could be with. Luckily no one is interested in me so I don't have to worry about that and I can just keep focusing on improving myself. Sure it may never be enough for anyone to ever love me romantically, but I'll like myself alot more and my life will improve someway regardless 🤷🏾♀️
@@vanarqwq3660 I didn't realize people think being cheated on/lied to is fun. And she didn't "settle" - she adores him. You don't know either of them - you're just spinning the narrative to match your already bleak world view.
It blows my mind people really think incels are going "man im a virgin whose never had a girl at 25 i wish i could finally get a girl.... BUT SHE HAS TO HAVE HUGE TITS FAT ASS AND BE MY SLAVE" like bro its so stupid i would understand thats what you think about younger guys but how tf do you assume thats all incels that dont get any attention from girls at an older age? So many guys wish they could get any girl but everyone assumes they have insane standards
The standards are only insane and unrealistic for men like us. We're not allowed to have standards really now that I think about it, they don't us being able to have a choice at all.
well... i don't think that, at least... i mean, for a nearly 27 year old with a V card, i actually dislike the idea of "big assets"... if anything the actual only things i even care about is if they smoke, (since i have asthma, so it could actually kill me) and if they have a good personality that wouldn't borderline torture me... like... that's it...
@Mew2Win well so far i ve yet to encounter the blackpill concepts being disproven, i agree with most of them even though i refuse to follow it s doctrine/doomer outlook
I totally agree with what Asmon said about reality and online life becoming integrated together. Its becoming more and more common everywhere I go to see both men and women staring at their phones and various other media. Online is becoming reality. Best advice, learn to love yourself for who you are, and have fun with life!
For me dating was a no go because men only treated me like an accomplishemnt. The moment a man treated me like a human being, and we discovered hobbies we loved together, i chose him. He is hilarious, 5'7 with a dad bod and now we have a son together, and are a gaming family.
One of my favorite high school teachers was on the short side. 70% of the kids where taller than her. People would try to make fun of her height, but she would always keep her head up and say I’m not short I’m fun sized. I talked to her I lot while I was in highschool. She helped me get over my confidence problems which led to my first GF. Didn’t last long as it wasn’t working out but I at least knew I can do it. The teacher always helped her students even if it wasn’t the subject she taught and even if it wasn’t school related. She helped a kid out who was getting bullied by their brother. Kept the kid from committing suicide. When the school themselves refused to help the kid. So sad they forced her to retire the year after I graduated. She was the best teacher I’ve ever had.
@@implodingllama2092 I think she meant fun person lol. But I'd be definitely thinking thats what she meant if she was young enough and attractive enough while I was in high school
I was unemployed and in a pretty low spot when I got my first gf, and it ended up being a healthy long term relationship. And thats simply because we were both genuine, upfront, and willing to accept being wrong. We didnt take offense to each other pointing out flaws in each other, rather viewing it as the other person cared and was something to improve, even if initially either of us might not see it as an issue we truly had. The first instinct was to improve, not to defend ourselves. Both of us were far from perfect, but I think that its a mentality that a lot of people need to learn.
@@xXxMouthxXx both my parents and hers were real pieces of shit to the maximum degree in different ways. In this case it was hers (I had cut contact with my parents by this point) who took an immediate dislike to me, because I'm far from what would be considered a normal person. I tried to reach out to them countless times, cuz I really did want them to accept me and talk so we could understand each other, but they never wanted to talk. From what I heard, because it was a long distance relationship, they didnt expect it to be serious or last long. But it did. And after over a year of us being happily together, they forcefully deleted all of her accounts, took away her devices, and told horrid lies about me to all of her friends so they wouldnt talk to me. But one of them doubted them and did eventually talk to me, which is how I know these things. There was obviously nothing this casual friend could do though, since her parents had also told the lies to the other parents of the friends. And these were blatant, despicable, not even remotely true lies. True evil shit. I'm not gonna trauma dump in a fucking youtube comment section, but my life up to that point had been hell in every way you can imagine, and needless to say this fucked my mind up entirely to nearly the point of insanity. But I'm supposed to be able to go into a residential psych treatment center later this month, so hopefully that helps at least some. Anyway, we were both people with lots of problems in rough spots. But we took responsibility for our flaws, admitted when we were wrong, and focused on helping each other. We would point out things the other did wrong all the time, but it wasnt taken in offence since we knew it was fair and the other really cared. So, although it was taken out of our hands, it was still as good as it could have possibly been while it lasted. It was hard at times, but we blamed ourselves first for our own issues and improved. Thats really fuckin important in a relationship, to discard personal pride and be fully ready to work on your own problems.
that's why i always am skeptical when peoples go-to solution is "improve yourself first", they have no idea how motivating is being on a relationship because they never saw the difference
I always say I’m so glad I grew up in the 90s. Just late enough to start getting good tech but also remember the world before cell phones and internet being everywhere.
@Dale Paget it didnt really start to become a thing until Netscape and AOL. that was around '96 and even then I remember barely anybody used it. It started taking off when Ebay did.
I remember the early 2000s when you had to use dial up to even have the internet and you used to have to pay to call anyone outside of your area code. It's crazy to think that was over 20 years ago now.
Man miss the 90s. I had my Sega genesis and my skateboard and that's all I needed in life til I went to my first PC café at 11 years old and got hard-core addicted to counter-strike 1.0
Yea I’m 35 and beyond grateful to have experienced a childhood that was not overrun by technology. It’s incredible how diff. my childhood was from age 10-21 vs someone in current times. When I was in 8th grade computers hit our school (the big back colorful apples) and basic Nokia phones lol
I’ve just given up on dating because I’m not sure where to find a middle aged woman that’s into video games, watching RUclipsrs talk about or play video games, and watching cartoons. I can adult and hold a job and pay my bills, but in my free time I’m a homebody with “childish” interests and hobbies. Plus I’ve gotten used to and actually enjoy the peace and quiet of living alone with my two cats and doing whatever the heck I want whenever I want without having to take anyone else’s wants and desires into consideration.
tbh conventions is where i met my girl. im exactly like you, responsible adult, can pay my bills ect ect, but i also go to conventions and meetups with similar interest since i play video games + watch anime.
Yeah, the biggest problem I have with dating and meeting new people in general is also similar. It feels like going out to meet new people is going to make me meet people who are the opposite of me. People like me are going to be on their computer like I am. So basically, unless I decide to break into people's houses, that isn't gonna happen.
Okay, so you know that you live the life of a manchild, and that you could use real friends and be more responsible with your short time on earth, but you don't. Because you're used to the low-effort lifestyle of being a shut-in and a loser. That's fine if you want to be that way. But stop lying to yourself. You want to stay in the safe convenience of being a loser with no friends. I just don't understand why people post stuff like this. Like if you were actually cool with being alone you wouldn't have to let everyone know that you've "gotten used to and actually enjoy the peace and quiet". Something tells me that quiet is getting a little bit hard to bear. If you want my advice, I would really consider ditching the cats (they're too much work anyway right?) and finding more meaningful hobbies and friendships/connections with people. Everyone I know who played videogames as a hobby just got burned out on them and found it just depressed them after a while. Watching content isn't necessarily bad, but what about your physical health? How are you maintaining your intellectual prowess? Do you have a faith or religion? How are you strengthening that? What is your goal in your job for the future? Are you chasing a career or what? Why not consider helping out young men? What is your purpose for being alive? Why bother with any of this? Not to get too autistic about the minutia and maybe I'm missing something but you see what I mean. These are questions that an ADULT would ask themselves. And these are things that ADULTS, who are normal, have sorted out for themselves. For whatever reason, maybe it's mental problems or the easy distractions, but you, apparently, are incapable of being curious about anything that actually matters. And you're a p*ssy. But that's fine. Because you're totally okay with that right? Because you have f*cking cats and a tv.
I am a short, balding dude. When I hear one more person say "just be more confident" I am going to lose my shit. Women are shallow, and I am not attractive to them, it's just what it is. The Tinder percentage for women is also kind of skewed, since the rest is in a relationship or "situationship" / friends with benefits, and they do not need Tinder and co. Those are still the same women with the same mindset, like the ones who use Tinder. Instagram is also a dating app nowadays, and basically all women use it. The video is lacking some detailed perspectives on these things. It's worse than portrait in his video.
Woah dude, c'mon, look at this: *Shows picture of 1 in 100,000 case of hot woman dating ugly bald guy*. See, this ultra-rare occurrence means looks don't matter! /sarcasm
more like "*people* are shallow" I myself, as a young adult guy who's a 6/10 (or maybe a 4) I would never date a girl who isn't at least a 7. And I'm convinced that that doesn't make me shallow, it's just how attraction works for most people. Does animal attraction work with shallow mechanisms? Yes, but it isn't news, it's just what it is. Can you ignore that? Not really, you're gonna end up keeping a relationship with a partner you aren't attracted to ... how would that even work?? You can't judge people for rejecting offers they're not really attracted to.
I'm 42 now, and have been engaged to my guy since 2018. As a artist, karate person, gamer girl, and someone who's cosplayed (I still kinda do, lol), I intermingled with the gamer/nerd crowd a lot over the years, and encountered TONS of "incels" while trying to find a guy. The doom and gloom attitude, and aura they gave off was a #1 turn off for me. Just that attitude put them in the friend zone for me. I was also single until age 33, other than a few brief relationships before that. I had the doom and gloom/lonely mindset myself for awhile, and didn't meet the right guy until I had gotten over that. Negativity is a HUGE turn off. It will either attract a negative/weak partner who's just as insecure as you are (if not worse), or keep you alone. It's definitely important to be a FULL person with something to give of yourself, before chasing after someone else.
Rejection is my biggest fear, I spent 22-26 hanging out with a girl and the entire time I never told her how I felt. I told myself I'd tell her when I got the perfect body but that never happened and eventually she stopped asking me to hangout. Also when I first met her I asked the internet for advice and after posting a pic of myself everyone told me it was over, hit the gym, that I was a 1/10 and that I had no chance which caused me to hurt myself, starve myself and spent 90% of the day crying for years.
@@j.d.s.1837 yeah I've actually gotten a few dates over the last few years which I thought was impossible for me because people online told me it was impossible
This guy's video is great, just one addition/fix to this comment: "If you get rejected, figure out what you did wrong and move on." - This isn't always accurate. Sometimes, you did nothing wrong. You were just a victim of circumstance. The person you are pursuing might not be looking for someone at the moment, they are interested in someone else, etc. Some things are just out of your hands. Do what you can to learn, but don't dwell on the "Why" you were rejected.
Sometimes you just did nothing wrong, even if you get rejected in very unpleasant manner, sometimes it's the person you wanted to ask out. We are all humans, the girl you want to ask out can also be an asshole
You can learn something from EVERY situation. Even if the rejection was 100% out of your control, there’s still knowledge to be gained from the experience
Yeah, it's all too real. Very complex situation....it's not just social awkwardness. I'm 40 and never had a girlfriend because when I had the best opportunity, I never took it. The only reason I'm not a virgin......was because I decided to pay for it to see what it was like in my 30's and it remains one of my biggest regrets in life. I have a job as a manager, and I'm a licensed pilot too. I certainly was fit 5'10" and good looking until Covid hit. I was such a failure in dating I had to go involve myself in the "pickup community" to learn to have fun and how to interact with women. But that got very tiring for an introvert because I felt like I constantly had to "be someone else" in order to attract women, and it just wasn't sustainable. Being called an "in-cel" is pretty accurate of me now....I don't feel like I could live with anyone now in my life, and I feel like I have difficulty forming emotional connections with people. I've always hated online dating, and the 'few' dates I've had I got from speed dating or public pickup. Obviously there's much more that can be said, and it's not something surface level, but this is just a short paragraph. There are tons of rationalizations I put in my head to try and live with it. Heck, any time I got 'close' to something I reached a limit of "unexplored territory" and I scared myself off by sabotaging the situation. There was once where I could have actually taken home a one-night-stand, and the moment I realised that, I sabotaged and ran away. One big no-no? Trying to date at work.....living with the consequence of failure / embarassment not worth it. I was VERY much in that mode he gives advice on near the end of the video......but it was short lived and hard to continue.
As a dude thats 5’6” I can attest to this. I was very athletic though and I do have a compact frame so it was easy for me to put on muscle. Staying active in the sports and the gym helped me stay in good shape which helped me have different relationships with girls/women. Confidence is key, but obviously, and just as you stated, money is one of the biggest driving factors too.
fr I fucking hate all these people saying "confidence is the most important bro". Like no, when attractive people are unconfident they're shy and humble@@al-imranadore1182
lowering standards is wrong, you either like someone or you don't, don't go for the girls you feel unsure or feel like something is lacking. It loses the point of relationship if you go for something unsure just because you feel insecure and think you can't have better or its your only chance to get a girl, at least for me it's just better to be alone then go for something i am unsure i like.
That’s true for a woman. Men don’t and shouldn’t operate under that mindset. As a man you should approach as many women as possible until you are successful. If you’re looking for the perfect woman all the time you’re going to be disappointed
@@ILoveGrilledCheese Nah. His advice is perfect. For men too. Then again I guess it's all about what you want out of a relationship. But I'd rather be single than be with someone who makes me feel lonely.
THIS! So much this! Being in a relationship should be something wonderful, something that adds to both people! It should be something where both have a legitimate interest in keeping it going, and you can't have that if you're willing to knowingly settle for second-best. Either you have perfect chemistry and it sparks or it doesn't. And if it doesn't, then don't do it. I am perfectly comfortable with trying, failing, waiting, and seeing and holding out for that one moment where fate smiles down on me and keeping an open heart and mind until then. And I think that's the best choice a guy or girl can make.
@@ILoveGrilledCheese this is 100% how you get taken advantage of by manipulators and then the birth of another woman hating incel is upon us cause of 1 bad egg.
22:40 yep! Mariage rates had to do A LOT with social norms. My grand mother told me that an unmarried woman was view suspiciously in the 50s and even the 60s. A married man had WAY more chances of landing a better paying job. An unmarried woman had an extremely difficult time getting a mortgage or even opening a bank account. Being married was also a badge of honor… They were now normal functioning members of society. And your correlation with money is bogus. Most people who got married in the 40s, 50s, 60s and 70s had nothing but the clothes on their back. Honeymoon ? 🤣 Most people resumed their lives the very next day for their tiny salaries. My parents spent the weekend in a local hotel ffs.
lol, this is a trend now, I'm 29 and still virgin, nothing new here. But the thing that surprises me the most is that people actually think that being virgin is worse than being a whore.
Why the shit is being single such a bad thing? I literallyhave no desire to deal with someone else's bullshit every single day. I go out and party and whatnot, talk to peopleon and offline, but i have 0 interest in being bound to someone. Their problems becoming mine just is not appealing to me whatsoever.
As a black, 6'2 incel with a micropenis which apparently is rare, I have to say you had an interesting take. Last time I dated was back in 2015 and it was what it was. Lost my virginity late and yeah you realize damn I dont live up to the stereotypes adult films or society say I'm supposed to. I'm an empath so when I see videos from blackpilled, whitepilled, or redpilled creators I both feel sorry to the guys in a worse position than myself but envious of those on the end of the spectrum. The thing alot of men need to take away from these communities is that holding onto resent and hate does not make sense. I was 21 when I attempted deletion and I came out the other side. At 33 life is in a much better place. I dont date but I am planning on going into fatherhood alone. I always wanted to be a father and the career advancement I have worked hard on over the years has put me in a position to do that when I read 35/36. I hear being a single parent is not ideal, but for the kind of woman i would ideally want she doesnt exist. No hatred towards women from me, but it is what it is. Just have to go about things yourself. Adoption or a surrogate. Whether you are incel, volcel, outcel or whatever just know that you are a man and try to either improve on yourself or just make the most of the resources around you. God bless and great video!
Inspiring words my friend. I have the same feelings as you even though i’ve just barely turned 20. I really really want to be a father at some point but I just… don’t see myself together with a woman with the same wishes in this day and age. I’m just so horribly down because of how many unlucky situations I had involving girls, it’s just so hard for me. I hope you are able to do it and find happiness in fatherhood. Bless you ❤
And its only going to increase Personally,ive given up as i had a really bad experience despite doing my best to provide everything, i still got abused and eventualy cheated on. Women are not worth it if youre not part of the top percent of men. And even then, they have to watch out too, as any allegation is enough for them to lose money. All in all, it took some time, and though occasionallyi suffer from the pangs of loneliness and craving a relationship, ive come to mostly be at peace with the fact ill never find a woman who wont use and abuse me like all the others, and that im valuing my dignity and mental health over women Do not sacrifice your mental health,wealth, and dignity over women. Let them all fight over the top men and dont get involvedwith that mess. Let women be miserable alone, and NEVER give them a chance. You come first, before any woman wholl drain you from everything and leave you a broken shell of yourself. Never commit
Best advice for getting friends and eventually a girlfriend: Find things you like doing that are in public. That’s it. Museums, bird watching, sports, church, whatever. Other people will congregate to those places and you’ll have opportunities to talk to them. Obviously some places have higher potential for finding single women than others.
Tbh the real tip is to not pursue dating like it's a hobby or something, let's face it that's fucking weird and a true no lifer. You'll be noticed as someone forcing it, being greedy, needy, desperate, creepy, ect. Like you said, hobbies and doing things you like will get you noticed and people will be interested in your hobbies. That's how you get conversations started most of the time anyways. Met alot of people doing things I find fun, though I don't date, still have had people ask me out or at least make new friends who are within those same hobbies. People fear the "oh so scary freindzone" but when those friends invite you out places or to other interesting things then you meet more people who might be interested in you or you're interested in them. If you're not out with people then you're not gonna get a date very easily. I would say online dating but that's an entire catfishing or scammers mess from what I've heard, never tried it probably never will.
Hey man, I don’t watch you for your WoW content because I don’t play WoW. But I subbed a while back because you have un-ironically good way to deconstruct ideas and formulate them into smaller chunks of information so that the general laymen can understand. Keep it up!
interesting. I don't play video games, and I don't agree with a lot of what asmon says, but he has some sort of captivating charisma that really drags you in.
@@jcon2060 I also don’t agree with Asmon 100% of the time. I think it’s healthy to disagree with people about topics. But he does have charisma, if he doesn’t no one would watch him.
I personally believe the use of the word rejection alone implants a negative connotation to the outcome of the event and breeds unhealthy resentments, as long as youre fully secure and confident within yourself that wont be an issue but if it is then try see it as a lack of compatability. You just werent compatable for each other.
The guy that made this video is super coping. The divorce rate is dropping because the marriage rate is dropping. Not only with the laws that focus on being heavily anti man, and the solid terrifying reality that one day she can just leave, take what i have and hold my children hostage. The attitude that women have now is terrible too. They think helping people you supposedly love is somehow slavery. Its just madness. Why risk everything when theres nothing to gain?
On that second part I just wanna add how dumb it is they want to say it's empowering to ditch staying home to take care of kids and instead go on to work for a man that doesn't give a shit about them for minimum wage how tf does that make sense
@@ryukobestwaifu3319fr fr no need to do that if a man is already bringing in cash. unfortunately tho with how high prices are in america a bunch of families need both men and women working to provide a stable income
@@ryukobestwaifu3319 But men also go on to work for a man that doesn't give a shit about them for minimum wage whats the difference? Everyone has to work.
The main thing is that women are sick of working full time while also having to come home and do the job of a full time SAHM. Even if they make more money. 2 whole generations watched their mothers do this and said no thanks.
@berrymint6486 i'm pretty sure he already did my guy he's talking about relationships and being happy with someone who doesn't treat him like an object which i pray he do
ik its a joke but games being the cause for sexlessness seems a bit of a reach i know a few guys who game eat junk food and get a new gf every few months
15:00 this is called "warehouse syndrome" it's when you're working in a warehouse, with just a bunch of dirty dudes and the corporate chick, who is a 5/10 at best in the real-world walks in, but in that environment she's a 10/10 because she's the only chick
I have this doomer mentality more about the state of the world than I do about my interpersonal relationships. Hard to look at things happening locally nationally or globally and actually feel like trying or forcing a kid to exist here. I'll just exist minimally until I dont. unless something drastic happens.
I have pretty much the same outlook. I had enough problems with my childhood, let alone my adult problems. If I had kids I bet they would likely inherit my same problems to at least some extent. Life would likely be a bitch to them also, so I just assume not have kids and put them through all that.
this exactly dude... I dont even think dating isnt even that bad these days - its just the overall fear/insecurity and informational overdose we are living in.
Honestly, the bit about being confident in yourself and not needing to be in a relationship to feel "complete" is very important. Not everyone would agree with me, but, in Christianity, marriage is the idea of "two become one". In a way, if you feel that you are an incomplete, self-loathing person, you aren't going to "complete" yourself by finding another incomplete person: you're just going to see that each of you are horribly broken. Not to say one can't make that relationship work, but it's ultimately humbly accepting how one is that comes first.
This is what I keep telling my friend. He's in his mid 20s and never been in an official relationship before and he just keeps talking about wanting to be in a relationship all the time and how it would make him so happy to which I said it won't work then. Unless you are content and happy with yourself as a person you will never be in a successful relationship.
@@Jordo246 Honestly man, I don't even think the biggest problem is you feeling bad about yourself. I manage to feel happy alone, the real problem is the fear of not finding anyone decent by 30 There complicates...
@@Akito_Yamada870 that's my point though, a lot of people get into relationships not because they want to be in a relationship but because they don't want to be alone which is not a good thing to have as the foundation of your relationship. I've seen a lot of people who literally cannot be single for more than a couple weeks, sometimes even less. I've known people that always make sure they have a new relationship waiting for them as soon as they end their current one. Hell, it's happened to me in the past. Most people are not okay with being alone, I used to be afraid to be alone until after my previous relationship I took a 2 year break from relationships and became okay with just being on my own. Now I live with my fiancé and things couldn't be better. Maybe it's different for everyone but personally for me relationships just never worked properly until after that.
I got nowhere in high school with girls as a total skinny nerd, but in college, I sprouted up to around 6'4" and women flash-mobbed me. I didn't even understand it back then, as I was still a skinny nerd with no game. But it didn't matter. Women really do go for taller guys. Short guys can make it, but they have to work harder.
Rates are based on ratios, the words even have the same prefix. So 50% of 100 is the same rate/ratio as 50% of 100000. Looking at divorce rates is of total marriages, not of total people. You can't measure divorce rates of people who don't marry. So of course the rate is on people who get married and it's a ratio.
never had a girlfriend in my life, sure, at 22 i tried getting girlfriends before, only to be toyed for years and never gotten past the friendzone, now i'm 27 and i just don't care, i realized i don't need to get a partner if i am good by myself, the only con i have is that i may regret not being a father. But meeting a girl and all is just not worth the headache nowadays...
The pandemic definitely poured gasoline into the flame. The pandemic started halfway through freshman year (for me) and we’re just coming back and it’s senior year. People are over all a lot less social and very few people are in a friend group, let alone a relationship.
As someone who was homeschooled through highschool, and then had the pandemic through most of college, that makes me feel alot better about only having one small friend group.
@@EXTREME_FLUFF Yeah I used to have a lot of friends in middle school when COVID happened I had enough I decided to go full time online school but I still have my family so I am happy.
Not even. Just the internet and how the youth having access to a bunch of information that they can't handle because they 1. their brains aren't developed and 2. haven't even experienced adulthood out of school. Takes a strong will for the real world to emotional drain yeah or feed yeah some bullshit.
People took "social distancing" too literally. But that's why they called it social and not physical,that was the agenda,to make people even more distant than they were.
The sad reality is a lot of people never learn how to have difficult conversations. You read all the books or articles you want, you will never know how to have those conversations unless you have them. Take it as a sign that those women are cowards and lack significant maturity. Their lost not yours. You don't want to be with someone who can't even politely reject you.
Social media has definitely ruined relationships and how they work. I’m glad that I have had relationships and honestly you just have to put yourself out there
I am glad I grew up in a time before Facebook. I think I am shy as hell but compared to the newer generation, I am social butterfly. Also I just don't care about rejection, don't like it, can accept, but sometimes just don't want to deal with it also. So allot of times I just don't care to bother. But allot of people have become very self centered. It is hard on both sides. But if you really put yourself out there, know who you are, know what you want out of a relationship, are decent person, you can find someone. (no money, live with ex, I still can get a date). Do forget the most important elements that people need. Attitude and personality.
"Having a girlfriend is like having to do an extra 20 daily quests a day" - A true gamer take (also true)
The best mid max is to farm a lot of income initially with a good job, and then rent a girl for a girlfriend experience whenever you want. Minimum effort if you gain a lot of money, and maximum result because you get to have those good experiences with women without having to go through "20 quests a day".
@@guts3318 You should date an old women then, simple.
@@Yggdrasill8 I'm sorry I failed that one, ingot an error message saying I needed 50 years of experience.
T'was a good entry level job too, almost paid twice the minimum wage.
@@ferd3007 is she is 40 and no husband, then maybe something is wrong with her
@@federikriline9613 considering the high amount of options the average woman has compared to the man this is true
watching asmongold for relationship advice is like consulting a homeless man about buying a house.
Why this make me bust out laughing 😂
He's 110% right though.
That's fucking hilarious!
@@DDadams0 no he isn't
@@JoshuaGraham8383 he is. Come back to this video after you've dated more than one person for more than a few days.
“You’re not gonna play somebody else’s saved game” is the funniest line I’ve heard all year
Yea that completely caught me off guard. Definitely using that when someone tells me to date a chick with a kid
@@Thecultofwrestling yes, yes you can.
@@Thecultofwrestling 20% isn't a huge percent. people don't date single moms for a reason, so they probably are fine with cutting off 20% of their options if its options they don't want.
@@Thecultofwrestling lets be real theyre all a bunch of pssies terrified to have to actually put effort in theyre relationship just because she has kids doesn't mean you get to be a little btch and duck her just to turm around and act like a victim
@@6lake. gottem
(imo) "Incel" feels like shaming someone for doing something 'involuntarily.' Most people desire a real partner, who is loyal, loving, and shares common-interests (a true partner in life). Society is very broken and men are coping with the realities of modern relationships the best we can (epic levels of misandry baked into the entire system) and that means many are in a state of permanent loneliness... gaming (with related bad habits) is a way to medicate, kill the loneliness (a vicious feedback loop). Not all of us want to go to clubs. Some just want a low-drama life. Think many men have given up.
NOTE: Was married 18 years, till wife's death.
Yup, and 50% or more of the men who are actually putting in the effort of getting married, are being destroyed in divorce court.
Nailed it. 33 single since I’ve been an adult. I haven’t given up… just refuse to lower the standard of the way I carry myself and that seems to scare them all away.
The loop effect you speak of resonates with me tremendously. I tell myself that everytime a new wow expac comes out and I binge it for months. It’s cope and I know it but have accepted it.
But.most incels arent willing to put any actual work in to being a good partner
Sorry to hear about you wife
"I'm insulted when a guy less than 6 feet asks me out"
That is a sentence I overheard a female co-worker say to another female co-worker.
The problem you have is you take this personally. Guys literally do this all the time, they joke about wanting girls with big titties and some even make jokes about girls with small boobs. So the "insulted" part is probably just joking around, and the over 6 foot thing is a preference which is 100% okay and valid to have lol.
@@viserus_ When the guy does it, he gets fired for making female coworkers "feel unsafe" around him, even if he wasn't talking to them. Happened to one of my coworkers.
@@TheBayzent so when you reported this what did your boss do? Your failure to follow up doesnt mean theres an equality issue here. You just didnt say anything lol. The mental gymnastics is insane
+viserus I never thought about it that way. You may be on to something about it being joking around. But a girl wanting a guy to be over 6 feet is like a guy wanting a girl to no more than 120 pounds, shallow standards that are set by hypocritical people.
@@thevigilant6884 in this day and age the dating pool is so big, you can set loose preferences like that, instead of "settling" for lack of a better word with someone outside your preference. It may seem shallow to some but when you are dating to marry and not for fun you want to find someone who fits your attraction profile first
it's always impressive how asmondgold is able to flawlessly switch back and fourth between 300 and 3 IQ takes
Fr but is more like stupid point each 9 interesting things so bro valid
which would imply that he ever had a 300 IQ take regarding anything NOT related to MMOs or gaming... which he didn't
Which makes it 150 iq on average, good enough lmao
Think for the most part his 3iq takes are rare and often are ironic
I think we'd all sound like that if we all thought out-loud as much as he does.
The comparison to getting a job without experience but needing the job for experience is literally me.
Ive been trying to get a career job for over 15 years without success. It's impossible to get a good paying job when all jobs require experience.
@@virtual240 The secret is to know the right people and have multiple advantages over everyone else but that doesn't help the people at all who don't have those advantages and the people who DO have those advantages DON'T NEED help.
Good luck career dude I hope something becomes a good opportunity for you my dude.
@@virtual240 Sometimes you can get the job without experience, most employers demand vacancy just because they're not sure what they want from a man.
My employer had put up a 3 years of experience in the vacancy but hired me (with not a day of exp) just after a 5 minute talk.
dating is pretty much looking for somone who has experience but to get experience you need to date someone
Dude. Go get a class A CDL. You'll be hired on the spot with a decent driving record making 80k a year.
"Just approach women"
This is 2023. Women have said many times on the web that they do not want men approaching them. Not worth it.
sucks that just cus a fraction of men r weird and creepy there are girls who dont want nothing to do with them. so now everyones just trying to play it too safe
so, don't approach women "on the web". Approach them in real life
@@reformed_attempt_1 definitely don't do that. they launched the whole metoo movement to prevent that. women even tried to make that a felony in new york. DO NOT do that.
*they only want chad to approach them.
This isn't true in every scenario. When you hear women say this its in reference to not wanting to be approached by a random stranger while they're going about daily life. Tho if you approach a woman in a social setting and introduce yourself and see how things go in that context women are generally more receptive.
"20 more daily quests that you don't want to do" was the most beautifully Asmongold thing that i've ever heard
lol that and "Nobody wants to play your saved game"
its just true
i died laughing RIP
POG 😂
I laughed so bad at this !!!
I'm that 1% of men that aren't ugly because they're fat or going through puberty, I'm just truly ugly because of a severe facial deformity. I was bullied throughout high school and can't function in social situations because I know people are staring at my deformity. I had girls tell me to my face that I'm ugly so its safe to say my chances of having a meaningful relationship are slim to none.
Use it as your weapon of success if they can’t look away they’ll probably listen
Sadly our society is based on looks and status, but that doesnt means that out there is a special person waiting to share beautifull moments with you, keep grinding and improving yourself (studying, reading, working out and talk to people) nobody is ugly, we are just different and special on our own ways, we must find what we do best and go for it, much love from Uruguay and dont stop the grind
@Demetter I'm not going to sugarcoat anything, I have a dental deformity and honestly all you can do is either get surgery to be accepted by society(you never will be) or accept that the world is unjust and you will be unfairly treated no matter what
There are however some people who will judge you based on your character and not how you look, they are rare but they do exist
Bro us INCELs need to start making BANK and start controlling the narrative. Start TECH companies and own Social media. Get in Politics. That way we can influence change. Because until such time as we do. We will FOREVER be the butt-end of jokes.
@@hunger4wonder Most of the "ugly" guys I've seen dating attractive girl are just overweight, they have very average features. I get treated like I have special needs when I go out, that should tell you how bad I look.
The worst part of this: half the time when I ask a girl out she looks at me like I'm doing something I'm not supposed to. Like I should feel ashamed that I dare be interested in someone.
not only they, the group, like coworkers, classmates, group of friends, they all behave like if you commited a crime. but if one of the good looking guys do it, they are all happy. it's like if you are an average guy, you are baaaaad if you dare to even ask out a girl. even if you are the most respectful, polite, and say the same things or bette things than what the "good looking guys" do.
they can do and say harsh things but they all laugh about it and there's no problem, but you ask somebody out in a polite way, and the whole group of friends is angry at you.
Coming from someone who used to be incredibly socially awkward who became more comfortable over time, I honestly think that level of attractiveness is not really the thing at play.I think that the more important factor is understanding/social awareness of a particular situation. It might be an annoying answer, but a lot of times you need to just understand the vibes whenever you're with someone, and there are times where you think things are looking good with someone in terms of chemistry and they are, but the vibe isn't suggesting a desire for romantic chemistry. It's kinda like the phrase of "they're like a brother/sister to me" that I'm talking about. I had made that exact mistake once and I learned from it, because at the time I hadn't been in a relationship and didn't understand that the social cues for when someone is interested in you is different (doing therapy also helped me with these things).
I have the belief that anyone can physically make themselves look like a seven at the very least with good enough self care, and anyone who would reject a seven just on looks alone isn't someone you would likely enjoy dating anyway. Just make sure that you are a generally pleasant person to be around and put yourself out there and you'll almost guaranteed find someone who mutually resonates with you.
beacuse all most of them care about are casual hookups not serious dating lol
@@zzane4677 No it's not. For someone who wants to talk about social awareness, you sure made a long ass comment nobody's going to read.
People always have excuses, it's just halo effect.
@@joschmo4497 Bro go watch a sunset or something, you gotta chill out some.
Im an incel but im not lazy or socially awkward, i work 2 jobs and people like me, as a child i often got praised for being mature for my age and well manered. But being bullied at school and abused at home without a single person helping me makes me feel like im not even human. Every social interaction is just theatre and i cant form bonds with other people
Judging by the comment you're probably smarter than the average person as well (no irony)
@@KaiserNightcoreMusicthat's probably why he's an incel.
just like me fr fr
i totally understand you .
Yeh. Hard to go through that, then graduate to being called 'creep' 'stalker', or some other insult just because you tried. You have to endure so much and receive no protections, then you have to instantly perform at a very high level and are disposed of if you aren't good enough. On an unrelated note, the fembots might finally be nice, if you can deal with the artificiality of it all.
Oh, I'm not afraid of rejection... I'm afraid of being labeled a creep because I'm an introverted below-average looking guy hitting on someone I don't know.
You deserve someone king. Got you boi. get on out there. i heard that one girl super likes you. GO get em killer
This tbh, I don't even bother anymore. Intimacy is not important , my sanity and happiness is
@@JoeyJ0J0your sanity is going to crumble if you keep denying your situation
@@Cheezeblade kinda creepy
@@matowakan only kinda.
The amount of cringe from 2008 to 2018 has also tripled
as well as the amount of 'influencers' ...ah wait it's the same thing nevermind
Tripled a thousand times
Nah, we just see it more often
it's a religion behind that cringe just fyi.
Like pointing out the cringe in the first place has also contributed...
Last date I had was a shit show. Was 19 or 20 and thought I found a unicorn basically. We loved the same movies, she liked the same vidya and we messaged back and forth for a few weeks, just nearly non-stop talking and I proposed meeting and having a cup of coffee, just to see if we get along the same in real life. We were both pretty excited.
I get to the Cafe like 5 or so minutes early to grab a table, she messaged me that she just parked and on her way.
She walks through the door with a toddler like 3 or 4 and sits down with the kid. I jokingly say something like is that your little brother and she just says nope, it's my son. She had never mentioned a kid before. Nothing in her bio mentioned a kid.
I try to at least be civil and polite, she ordered drinks for herself and the kid as well as lunch for both of them. Almost 60 bucks just for them. I just got a coffee. She then had the gall to say "Hey, you're paying right?". I just left and over the next week I had to deal with calls, messages. I even had photos of me at the grocery store shopping sent to me because she spun a fucked up story to her friends so they keep harassing me.
So nah, I'm good.
>I found a unicorn basically. We loved the same movies, she liked the same vidya
Step 1 is to not use ''unicorn'' and ''vidya'' unironically. Jesus.
Similar with me, but she had TWO toddlers, daddy's still in the picture, and I'm neurologically disabled
I hobbled away as fast as possible
@@NoNoNoNopeNopeNopeNo Using the 4chan ">" outside of 4chan is just as bad
@@paz1514 exactly, it's as bad as using twitch emotes outside of twitch, I had a friend back in high school who would unironically say poggers, I still don't know what the fuck he was saying that for
@@OGDweeb I've had a lot of women lie to me about having a child in the picture.
A lot of women are not upfront about it.
"You're not going to play someone else's saved game" is a perfect way to put it. I was raised by a single mom. My mom and dad got divorced when I was like 18 months old. My mom only ever dated 1 other dude who ended up being a weirdo my entire life. she died when I was 23. Very very sad
All the best for your future, man 👍😇
sorry man all the best with your life
I have almost same story, but my mom died when I was 16
"You don't play someone elses saved game." this metaphor was epic, man. 😂🤣
It was, but then I think about all of the saved Pokémon games that I would load into and take all of their Pokemon. So in essence I have played someone else saved game 😂
@@hyperactivelime9482 For real. My first time playing Pokemon Silver version, I finished someone's incomplete save.
@@hyperactivelime9482 I always deleted other peoples saves. Guess I really don't play other people's saved game 😂
@@thelegacyofgaming2928 Same. After my friend let me borrow his copy of Diamond and didn't ask for it back after a week, I looked up how to delete saves and made a new one.
I had never had a girlfriend before at 29 but after a particularly bad rejection I decided that I would no longer chase anyone and instead I would work on myself and let them come to me. I went on a diet, bought new clothes and stopped focusing on women. Within about 6 months of making that decision, a friend’s girlfriend noticed and set me up with a girl and she’s now my fiancée. The bottom line is that if you are not having success with women, the problem is not your height or the way you are pursuing them or society at large. The problem is you, stop chasing women who aren’t interested in you, and start doing things that make you feel good about yourself.
W
@@lazarus8453 i find this the complete opposite, as you get older for both men and women your tolerance to BS decreases
@@esuna4786 sounds like you live in the good part of town. 👍
yep she hit the age and she had to settle. get a prenup my dude.
@@lazarus8453 make that 32. 20s? nahh, the average thought they are 10 and deserved 10, become sidechick to top 1% who got the real 10.
telling someone with mental health issues to "just change their mindset" is like telling a paraplegic to "just get out of the wheelchair"
Or like telling someone drowning "just swim bro"
@@rsotuyo15 Or telling a schizophrenic to "just be real".
@@Yggdrasill8 Or telling someone with a lactose allergy to "stop being so intolerant"
don't be awkward, don't be depressed, don't let failures affect you, get a better job, improve yourself...
oh gee, i never thought that not being me could be the solution to all my problems, thanks dude!
It really isn’t though. There are resources available to you and most people can combat mental illness. He isn’t saying “just be happy 4head” he’s saying taking the necessary avenue to help solve your personal problems is important
I was in a relationship with a single mom, we were engaged.
She left me for an abusive guy she still had feelings for.
Jesus
Let her hold her L on her own
Thats how it goes, she was with u because nobody else wanted her and she needed help and shoulder to cry on
Damn, that's fucked. I hope you find someone even better in the future man
Good for you. You dodged a bullet there.
I'm not even an incel, I'm an insol. Involuntarily solitary.
Hard to think about having a girlfriend when I don't even have a regular friend.
Maybe get a hobbie like RC cars/boats/planes, I notice that anime based hobbies are really solitary while RC hobbies are community based
get a passport :D
Step one. Stop watching anime.
Anime is the key to the door of incelibacy
@@Fankas2000You're subbed to sseth *T* zeentach...
Damn what Asmon said from 3:55 is literally me. Never dated during elementary school/high school/college and pretty much was just all into video games and anime since at those times it was literally the golden age of gaming along with the starting boom of the internet. And now I am just working long hours and have no concept of how to even start lol
Just go places. Find a public thing that caters to your interests and make friends. Just talk about the stuff that you like. I recently apologized to a girl for going off on Super Mario 64 Speedrunning and she said I shouldn't say sorry, and that she likes hearing someone talk about something they care about. There really is someone for anyone, man. As long as you're honest and don't have bad intentions with them, people like other people that they vibe with. You just have to find them.
yeah, It can be hard. I ended up with one during college. I think papa is right though. You have to put yourself out there, being introverted is a big hinderance, but really if you are extremely introverted it should be something you are working on, and going out in public is how you work on it. 2 birds, one stone.
It's hard to give advice on which public to go to. If you happen to be religious i'm sure church would be a good one, even volenteering for activities afterward, but for me I would probably catch fire inside a church due to my many instances of blasphmy.
Can volenteer at a local animal shelter if you like dogs, or cats. If you meet a single girl while volenteering for the doggos.. she is 1/2 way yours already ;)
Also, not sure what age you are right now, but If you wait much longer than 25 a large portion of the women will have children, it's just science. So, you have to be okay with other dude's kids in the mix, get lucky and find a girl who doesn't have kids. If you wait long enough though, all hope is not lost. you get another great window at 35-45 when the kids these girls had early in life are now 18+ and out of the house.
Just put yourself out there, let people know you are looking, sometimes people have a weird tick where they want to set people up together, it's like their life goal.. so just tell as many people as you can (without being super awkward lol) that you are looking, and someone will most likely answer too.
Also, Papa is right about being yourself. Always plan for and play the long game. You are not trying to get in a girls pants once, you are trying to make a lifetime friend and partner. Do not lie, unless you are ready to make the lie reality. Playing the long game doesn't mean pressuring for commitment early though, as this could scare anyone off. Just let the relationship grow naturally.
find hobbies outside simple things like cycling gym/sports clubs or learn new skills going to meetups with people itll help you socially just talking out loud with them male or female literally do anything that means going into a group if you have any interests itll help
@@papahusky1263 HAHAHAHAHA pink view of the fking world. Luck and personal view do it all, it's untrue to say "there is someone for anyone" but it doesnt mean it's false either. "There is someone for the ones who search for it" is most what you mean to say, i would add "you got what you want to, from what you can have". Were all different, facing different problems, and having different needs, sometimes we doesn't even know anything about it all. Were just unequal at life, dont forget it.
Physically get out there and try new things. Classes, IRL meetups for Magic or other games, anime convention. You are capable of finding a quality girl- just get out there.
I found my wife at 30, and I was definitely at a point where I didn't care about the outcome anymore. I was pretty content with being alone, and while she was attractive and funny, if she liked me it would be a bonus, not something I NEEDED. I think that was a huge difference maker.
@@darraghsheehy4455 One of the best comments I've read, spot on mate.
@@darraghsheehy4455 true dat when nothing seem a big deal anymore you will be content with life no mattter what going on
Something older men need to tell younger men, being single or in a relationship, you'll have relatively the same level of happiness. The question you need to ask yourself as a man is if the person you're with is worth the bullshit they'll force on you. I'm 29 now and I prefer being single. Some men want a relationship. For me though, I don't like emotional people, I hate having emotions foisted onto me, I detest being tracked ("Where are you" texts at 11PM when I'm out with friends for example) and after a while you realize that warm wet hole doesn't make up for the shitty entitled person who has it.
At this point, she'd have to be 1 in a billion for me to consider a relationship. I'm going to be happy no matter what. I've got a good career, got my pit bulls, got my friends, got my hobbies. Sure, I'll battle spells of loneliness but I'd rather do that than deal with someone who probably needs an exorcism once a month.
@Darragh Sheehy i really don't get it. My friends tell me they wish they could make friends and talk to people(men and women) like I do, but it didn't work for me, I have many friends but my only lover is my right hand, no girl is interested, I'm not even ugly
@@darraghsheehy4455 Honestly, i've never been shy around women, i'm just not a very funny guy and i can't really carry a conversation for more than 5 minutes, this applies to anyone i talk to really. Most girls i've spoken to think i'm pretty good looking, but it never really works out because of what i mentioned previously.
Considering how many women these days have completely unrealistic expectations for what they expect from men, it makes sense why so many men give up trying to date. Less than 15% of men hit that magic status symbol of being at least 6 feet tall, yet so many women won't hesitate to say they only want to date men who are at least that tall.
The longer you spend single, the less the shaming language from women about being an incel who plays video games all day means anything to you.
I'm 6'1", I attract plenty but my social skills = complete ass.
Actually I have Autism and half the time can't tell that a girl likes me or not unless she made it OBVIOUS.
Consequently I taught myself to just make an attempt, if she doesn't respond well just ditch her then and there. I don't have time to try "game" that I can never try have with my condition.
I struggle just to appear normal in public despite adopting masking for 33 years before getting finally diagnosed with Autism.
People would try to bully and shame me for being skinny as a kid and I wasn't tall at all until suddenly i had a huge growth spurt in 9th grade.
Fast forward, I would graduate from HS with basically no skils or self esteem, definitely almost 0 confidence. First girls that acted interested wound up controlling my life for almost 3 years!
Did me wrong, baby scare, cheating, lying, guilt trippin the whole narcissistic 9 yard yanno?
Somehow, some way I'd find my way to my "obsessions" which were chemistry and music.
I found confidence had come from knowing your capabilities or being willing to press it a bit. We lose confidence when we find we are wrong, but we gain even more once we can learn how to accept being wrong about anything.
Then what's depressing? I'm finally figured it out and the other adults want to continue charades and lying all the time. I catch them and catch them in inconsistencies. The deflect and deny, project. Anything but ownership and I've learned they are bad news.
Gaslighters must be defeated at all costs and we need to be the ones to do that.
so many unrealistic expectations for dating. social media got ppl thinking their partner needs to be perfect 100/10 as soon as they meet and ofc almost nobody is so u just got a bunch of lonely ppl trying to meet or achieve unrealistic expectations
@@JoseGonzalez-k6u Have you seen the videos of girls who honestly expect to find a man making $100k+ before he’s 25?
They only want to be with professional athletes or entertainers apparently because unless he inherits his money or wins the lottery, the average man is not making that kind of money that young.
You can be hurt by the fact you are single, but never be mad at someone for having high standards. "People who are mad about someone having high standards just can’t reach them"
As a small woman with not many curves, yes it sucks that many men want woman with big boobs and ass, but the thing is, it’s their preference. It hurts, but I don’t have the right to be mad at them or blame them for my singleness. That’s childish
@@jonispringer Very honest input from you here, and it takes a very mature mindset to say what you've said. You seem honest.
While you might not be the "preference" that most men envision, I would go on to say you are worth it.
Their preferences are superficial, and who needs a guy like that anyway?
You would just be a notch in the belt, a tally to them anyway.
It takes a lot of heart and soul(corny i know) but also in my opinion a certain form of intellect for a man or woman to realize that what they're seeking, is not to be lonely, they want to cherish and be cherished. If they can't realize that, then they wouldn't be worth anyone's time and are lying to themselves and others.
I hope that you won't continue to hurt but rather find the positives in your life to focus on instead.
It's crazy seeing the differences between my high school experiences (2008-2012) and some of the experiences my friend's little bros are going through. None of us guys in my admittedly small (90 person) class would have been classified as incels (even the "nerdy" ones who didn't play a sport) - we didn't have crazy access to games/internet/Insta/TikTok (boarding school). Our relationships with the girls in our class were healthy. Just sad seeing schools today idk. Constant comparisons to what they see on Tik-Tok/Insta/Tinder.
If your not forced to deal with things at a young age... old dogs don't learn new tricks... and rejection is one of those... I wouldn't even classify most of those as incels as they voluntarily choose to never try
with people like Andew Tate there's also been an increase of harassment of female students and teachers.
@@LittleSparklingStars based
My high-school years was 2008-2012. We were a larger class and none of us would of been considered incels either.
Same. My classmates where really chill, specially the boys... Among the girls was some tension but nothing serious
This video really sounded like it said, "You want a girlfriend? Change everything about yourself." I get it but fuck that. I am finding it more and more strange the stuff people do to find a significant other. I find it really hard to believe the rewards are worth the effort. That is even assuming you find someone. You could just fail the whole time at best. At worst you get tricked and lose half of your stuff in a divorce. "But when you find that special someone it is so amazing." Okay but, for how long? The odds seem low and the rewards are iffy.
No. Better yourself for yourself and you will find a better girl.
@Coolerstetth.32I don’t know how people do it either, you literally have to be a god version of yourself and a narcissist to some degree just to keep people interested in you
change yourself, for yourself - stop making excuses for yourself
@@jimijames6449
"No. Better yourself for yourself"
correct
"and you will find a better girl."
incorrect and/or naive at best. but that's irrelevant anyways, since you should better yourself for yourself and not for the sole purpose of "gittn' sum'"
the leg lengthening one stuns me.. having been injured and been in a wheelchair, to voluntarily go through that, and never fully recover, just to maybe find a mid tier single mom is insane to me.. plus I'm a bit older to, 40 this summer..
I'm so tired that I can't imagine having a girlfriend, it seems exhausting, I just want to be alone, I have nothing against women.
@@PotterMarauder You had one bad experience and then fully gave up?
Same. I have nothing against women either. I just want to be left alone.
@@MisfitMatt no.
@@Supbrozki na. Why settle for extra responsibilities when you can just clap cheeks an go back home. Single life is by far better dawg.
@@Supbrozki I don't believe I said that.
the thing about saying just be confident is confidence comes from experience and from proving yourself by achieving great things. I only realize this later in life
So better yourself physically and mentally .. everyone starts differently in this life. Keep trying or go somewhere else in the world
@@andrewevans7992 or just wait for AI to get better
Fax though. The amount of dopamine that would rush through my body whenever I completed a new music project I was proud of is insane, and provided a huge boost to my confidence
Listening to asmongold explain dating is kind of like listening to my grandma explain how her iphone works
Asmon has mentioned before he’s had girlfriends, including pinksparkles.
yeah and grandma has an iphone. that doesn't mean she knows whats going in with it.
Oh my god yes. :'D It's basically he's saying some incel-ish and misogynist stuff, and feeding it to the watchers who want to hear it. That it's the women who are somehow ruined, not the men who can't get a date. Men like asmon probably know how to use desperate people and turn their problems even worse. Misogyny is created by men who want to get a lot of money out of other men. Desperate people want to hear those misogynists lies, he is their hero, he is the guy who makes them feel better and they agree what he's saying. But for real they just need to do the actual opposite what they're doing now to get some love from the ladies.
@@beelbrother1648 lmaooo
he is the perfect spokesperson for incels to not go full doom. Few can be more typical incel than asmon yet he views women as people.
I just stopped caring what women thought about me. I told myself I would just do what makes me happy and behold, I now have a fiance. Doing what I loved gave me confidence and being able to share what I love gave me something to talk about. Do I still hate socializing? Yes. But I found a partner who has similar interest so I can enjoy life with them.
Personally I'd never go that route myself
@@ArtisChronicles Then get used to being an incel hahaha. If you can't even do what he's talking about, which isn't nearly as hard as you might think it is, you're a very sad sad human being, and you'll never be truly happy, unfortunately.
Same here, it worked for me too.
Congrats
Same here. There are many many women out there who just want to chill out and take life day by day.
I recognized from a young age that having a partner would drastically reduce the amount of time I get to play video games, so I decided to remain single.
31 years old now, still single, lots of money in my bank account and plenty of time to play games after work and on weekends. Living the life.
King
Do you think you will look back and be happy that you wasted years of your life to play video games that, no matter how much time you put into them, never tangibly increased the quality of anything that mattered in your life? And as the years go by, the reality of just how much time you wasted only builds in the back of your mind until it becomes a consistent reminder of the choices you've made. Do you think a successful person would be satisfied if you were one of their children? Who lived to escape lifes stressors and buy doordash for dinner instead of figuring out their place in the world?
@@raderT90 Bold of you to assume so much about him just from the comment he wrote. He mentions having lots of money in his bank account, so it's clear he must be employed and sufficiently successful at what he does, he simply chooses to spend his free time enjoying electronic entertainment instead of forming a family and that offends you.
@@raderT90 You think the whole Life turns around a relationship? Some ppl just don't have that interest and tbh I wish I was one of them - It would make life a lot easier
Was the same for me, I compared how I felt spending time with my friends to spending time with girls. The conclusion was that I overall got more enjoyment with friends, but it is more like a slowly drawn out enjoyment whereas with a girl, all the enjoyment was compressed into the bedroom fun, and then everything else felt like a chore (20 side quests a day).
I think a big part of how real life and online life are being blurred together is because kids are now developing their personalities online instead of in real life
Here's my MAIN issue with dating apps (as a female) and why I don't use them. As a woman, I feel the 80/20 divide and not in a good way. I'm not hot by any means, I am very much an average woman who is pushing middle age but the few times I have downloaded a dating app and made a profile, I have been bombarded by matches and messages from an unbelievable amount of men. I am talking nearly a hundred in the first night or two. It is so overwhelming and as someone who actually wants to read profiles and try to find someone who is a good match for me, it takes me time to respond to messages. However, if I don't respond within at least an hour of receiving a DM (sometimes WAY WAY less) then I get hit with angry messages about how I am just another stuck up b**** or ugly or fat anyway. It's unreal. I've maybe done it 3 or 4 times and it always turns out the exact same way and I end up deleting the app within a few days. I stick to dating men who I meet in person now, it's always a friend of a friend, someone who has been vetted by the people in my life. That is safer and a lot less stressful.
My issue is I can't find women my age where I live, and I get out a lot. I go to church often. I go to restraunts and stores and the only place with 20-something y.o. women is working at Zaxby's
well, if you are bombared by over 100 matches, its your fault. dont swipe "like" that much, for a match it takes to, so dont complain
@@chocoyote two*
@@chocoyote lol shaming her for liking guys
@@HipsterKaren he's not, in fact he actually has a great point. she could limit the amount of people she has to interact with at once very very simply. however, i dont think it would increase the quality of the interactions by too much considering what the average male user of a dating app is like.
I believe it's the disconnect in a huge Society like the United States of america. There's a lot of people in this world who don't know anybody and kind of fall through the cracks of society. They are still there, they're working, their friendly, they're just not outgoing. There's probably a lot of them that aren't friendly also, but the point stands.
@Z let me ask you, do you have any statistics or factual claims that I made that you're disagreeing with? Or are you just commenting because you feel some type of way?
What a wunder! Feminists and the society has toxic thoughts on males and they get toxic to. That happens if you tell them that they are oprresive shits.
@@TrevorIsCommenting The _real_ _questions_ are: *was* your calculator in metric units and *did* *you* press enough buttons? 🤔🙃
You use tinder because you dont even know a remotely attractive girl who is single.
If you know one. The friend of the sister of your buddy. That chick from your side job. That friend of your niece. Then you have options. They know couples or people who aee unattractive. Or someone far outside their league.
Most people have no options.
The dont use apps advice is pedantic.
It is for people without options.
And Chad playas.
@Z hes not wrong that this is mainly a western thing.
as someone from Indonesia, both men and women around the age of 19-25 in the college where i study is generally a virgin and theyre doing just fine without getting depressed.
of course, this is mainly because of the fact that Indonesia is a muslim country so people are generally saving themself until marriage, and since they generally know people around them is probably a virgin too, they less likely to feel jealous or something like that. idk if jealous is the right word for it tho...
Comparing yourself to others is one of the most self destructive things you can do. Find worth and value in you!
It is not society that grades you but the system. Society is only a facade. It makes you feel batter. Laws either work or not. Another thing is that there is a whole range of things that people don't regulate. Go figure.
That sadly only works for a bit and then you are told as a Man DO MORE. NOBODY GIVES A FU-CK IF YOU CANT
@@user-jr2ue9nu6y that's my point, who cares what anyone else thinks, external validation is not needed, validate yourself choose your circle wisely and remove anyone who doesn't inspire/motivate/positive influence you
@@DaShikuXI I disagree, it starts with saying I don't have to accept the institution for my personal belief foundation. I love myself and accept myself and will continue to improve. It's totally fine to have a measuring stick to judge where you think you are but its 100% up to you to make that decision. I think we just need to be honest with ourselves if you're overweight and that bothers you, do something about it, if you're unhappy in your relationship do something about it, if you're not getting paid enough do something about it. I used to be homeless I came from nothing, I know it is extremely difficult but the choice ultimately is with ourselves.
@@1xRacer absolutely agree.
About Polygamy (having multiple wives), the reason it went away is because on a societal level it's terrible. Women will flock to maybe 10-20% of men, leaving the average man without a wife, without children and without any real investment in civilisation. This is why polygamous societies are more violent and less productive than monogamous ones, because societies are driven by averages not exceptions.
it's also not fair on the woman or the man either tbh
polygamy doesn't work
devoting your time to one person is hard enough
"I'm an ugly dude."
Nah man, you're at least a 5. Your facial hair is on point and you have nice teeth. You also speak with confidence.
I give him 7 cuz he looks like Jesus
Asmon looks like Baseball player: Justin Verlander. And he’s with one of the hottest women on the planet. (Kate Upton)
@@SugarSpyce Most women are 5's or below though, so it's a perfect match
Dudes just need to start wearing makeup to even the playing field. I'll tell you now I look a lot better with eyeliner just sucks to put on, lol. Get ya war paint on boys.
That is a big problem people assuming what other people are thinking and then blaming them for their own assumptions.
Single father of 2, my wife passed away 2 years ago. It's near impossible to have a woman take me seriously because I can't provide enough "attention" to them. Even providing every free moment possible with them. It's fucking heart breaking.
Lemme guess, most of them don't have children themselves or the kids are out of house.
Sorry that you have to go through that.
That's so freaking sad. On the bright side though that shows that you have a lot of committment and conviction, and what I hope for the other person to give a genuine try. What those women suffered, the same thing happens to men but in this I think women have more issues, from being unable to cope with attention. They need attention in order to feel like they are seen, heard and cared for which is something they need to work on. There is probably more to it than a youtube comment can properly reflect but on the face of it I see you have done nothing wrong.
I hope you and your kids are doing wonderfully and that you'll find a nice partner that is more mature to match your own maturity.
some women admire a working single dad, and they may not be showroom gorgeous, but they will appreciate you and not make you create a fake persona.
just give it time, these things pop up unexpectedly - maybe you bump into a lady at a supermarket and hit it off.
you don't need to bring up EVERYTHING lol :)
I can't speak for American women, but I always assumed guys have kids either in the side or in their car lol.
Stay STRONG KING.
My dad is also divorced and lives away but wanted to keep supporting his kids (me and sibling) and said she didn't force him to leave us behind our anything and respected it
Seems it was all bullshit since he left us not too long ago to pursue a life with her
AIM was instrumental to my game with girls when I was in middle school and high school. It was the perfect way for a relatively shy kid to talk to girls I went to class with before breaking the ice in person. It simply made physically breaking the ice no big deal, as you got to know each other on a more personal level before that step. I feel like being in high school between 2001 and 2005 was basically the perfect time technologically to socialize. Everyone was available, but not overly so since Facebook was not out yet. We had the convenience of today's social media without the over use, dependence and digital public history attached to us. It was used as a stepping stone to the ball game instead of being the ball game itself.
Agreed and it was 'new' so it was either cool or weird lol. Now its soo common, people use it as part of their daily game and women have build shields on it... putting shy guy in an even more shy prison. Also, alot of guys dont learn much from male figures, and we are pushed in front of our screen... while girls they have social skills biologicially integrated.. making it more hard for guys who don't develop social skills.. like the job/experience reference. Social media makes guys incel (sexless tripled and depressions doubled) and girls go crazy (their mental health deteorization went up too the roof, self harm increased by 300% over 10 years)
ASL? WANNA CYBER?
I wholeheartedly agree with both Asmon and Cole on this. My issues are three-fold:
1. I'm still getting over the fact my ex emotionally abused me. I understand not all women are like her and that she was a bad person.
2. I'm still getting over one of the worst rejections I ever had from back in high school where said girl gossipped about me and tried to socially ruin me (had someone looking out for me that shut that shit down) after I had tried and failed to ask her out. The funny thing was, I understood what I did wrong and was trying to learn from it; the rumors came two weeks later from her. Second place goes to a girl at my first high school who actually successfully "cancelled" me before that was a thing on false pretenses (where I hadn't even intereacted with her) to the point where I lost all of my friends I had since 2nd grade, became a social outcast, and had to move schools states away to escape it. That one was... particularly brutal.
3. Age. At the time of writing this, I'm 32. It's become extremely difficult to figure out this on my part. Bar scenes aren't my thing and I suck at it even with a wingman. If there are women at my workplace they sure as hell aren't on my team and other teams don't interact with one another too often if at all. And because of the above point, I don't want to get my life destroyed by someone because I happen to choose to speak with the wrong person. Don't know if that's an anxiety thing or something that's unresolved.
Before someone says to see a therapist, it's... in the works.
I'm also 32. And honestly, I can literally FEEL like I'm in my prime.
Don't get me wrong, I get it, you've been through a lot. But don't hide from it. Don't accept defeat, I know what rock bottom looks like. I've been there twice. The first time lasted maybe 6-8 months after being dumped out of a 5 year relationship. The second time... Well I used rock bottom like a fucking trampoline. And I understood... There will never be a single obstacle that I come across that will EVER knock me down like that again. I now revel in the challenge of overcoming whatever bullshit life has to throw at me. Bring it on.
Here's the profound part. I had no idea that I'd become this person until shit tried to hit the fan the second time. Something just took over. A combination of determination, and a realization that "results" are a byproduct and we are NOT defined by them. The actions, choices and behavior's that you engage in on a daily basis, THOSE define you. If you focus on the future results, achievements or goals, you'll compromise the NOW. But if you focus on making the actions you engage in today as meaningful as possible, then meaningful results will follow.
Honestly the speaking thing is pretty valid, some woman really are weird and when you so much as look at them or talk to them they get mad and will make some false complaints, or on some places just what you actually did is seen as an issue. But most aren't like that, but you could always be the unlucky one so I dunno.
br0, step 0. Get over HIGHSCHOOL Yikes my dude.
I’m sorry you went through that dude.
Jeez, the communication environment is really becoming toxic in US. I would say move to eastern Europe but we have a war going on here. Here women smile back at you if you smile at them and are actually pleased to receive compliments. There is no this "passive aggressive" bull like in US.
My dad was a biker, my mom was a teacher. They had to hide their relationship and even have her keep a separate apartment in her name even though they lived together because it would have been a scandal in the school district if their relationship was discovered, and this was in the early 80's.
We're talking Harleys right, not like a militant anti-bicycle community?
@@xbabu142x Yep
That wasn't the 80s. that was just a bunch of losers judging your parents.... my dad was a biker and my mother was a 3rd grade teacher..... nobody cared.
Somehow thought you meant your dad was a cyclist and was confused for a solid minute
@@ryankrogel9589 What is it with bikers getting with teachers?💀
proposed to my ex in Paris back in 2020, we didn't last the year...I focused on myself and work and ran into the woman of my dream. Im sitting here playing tarkov and I look to my left to see her playing hogwarts legacy and it just fills my heart because I didn't think she existed
👊 married my college sweetheart and got divorced while I was in Afghanistan in 2012. Working on yourself always attracts what you’re looking for.
I went from 16% BF to 11% BF that deployment…make them regret the decision bromo
Nice story
Last girl I talked to. Had a lot in common, really good conversations. All that jazz. Nothing that indicated the red flags yet. Then like maybe a few days in. I shit you not. She texts me saying she has a confession. All I think is “here we go again…” This woman bruh. She confessed to being an escort and she didn’t even know why she was telling me this. But she wanted a baby and wanted me to be the father… So yeah. I’m gonna start looking abroad. This was just another wall in a cascade of fucking crazy.
I am thinking of looking abroad, western women are not suitable to be mothers.
Bro escorts make good money, you lost an opportunity to get a living without a job
LOL!!! Run for the hills dude!
@@luigil8439 saying she wants a baby after a few days of dating is a red flag though.
This....did not happen, lol.
I'm 42, and a virgin. And surprisingly, I am not bothered by it. Although I wanted gf when I was young, I lost that drive by the late 20s. And the major reason for that -- free contents. And seeing so many other men getting wrecked in the courts. I said, "Nope," and I was good.
I'm so glad for it. Things have gotten so much worse, and it's probably gonna get even worse.
bravo, wizard. i myself am a sage. i see it here on my end as well, a coworker of mine is fighting his ex/ baby momma for any parental custody of his son. she falsely accused him of assault and never made a police report or any sort of public record saying that happened nor did she have any evidence. He's apparently guilty until proven innocent. according to child custody court and now the courts dock 70 percent of his salary for child support to which it goes to his baby mommas hair and nails and 30 percent of that money goes to the courts themselves as tax
none of it goes to his kid and he still never gets to see his son.
it has gotten worse and this is a common story. there's like 2 other my coworkers who been in it like that.
@@12334jk As a wise man once said, "Smart men don't get married."
Same mindset here at 35.
Problem is now if a man says a slight sexist joke he is misogynist and if a guy has been in a bad relationship and he says nasty things about his ex then he is called a incel.
@@MikePhillips-x6m Former part is true, but not the latter. Any man that women finds unattractive is an incel, according to many women. And that's at least 80% of men.
Also find it hilarious how little the pandemic affected us gamers on a mental health level… if anything it was our time to shine.. the introverted heaven.
yeah almost nothing changed for me since I was a shut-in for quite some time already. Only these masks were quite annoying.
That is your personal experience. We all know that there’s an optimum amount of gamers who feel lonely, unwated, insecure and depressed.
actually gave me a good excuse to live out my life without feeling bad at all. I was protecting others by being a nerd.
I hit 60 on my shammy (classic wow) when lockdowns first started, got eye of rag same day I hit 60, and since I couldn't work at the time, I farmed all those hand of rag mats myself since I had nothing better to do 🤣.
If it wasn't for covid I wouldn't have gotten my cool ass orange hammer, so at least theres that ha.
@@Buren1123 well... but that's not due to the Pandemic
I’m noticing women aren’t appreciating or allowing men to have male spaces, humor, desires, or standards and that exists within relationships too. Always have to be careful that a woman can start to want to feminize many aspects of your life in negative ways (speaking from experience).
Ohh yah ! Once them gals start 'setting down roots' it's just the beginning. That's why one of my key Rules of Dating is NEVER taker her back to your place. Because once they see your stuff, THEN they can start getting 'ideas'...
@@veng3r663i feel like thats a refrence to something
@@Laith_Shahinthere definitely is something deeper behind the comment
spaces for people with a low income are becoming extinct, period. Don't worry, rich gentlemen clubs with lots of hos (female and male) EXIST!!
Find a qomen who can?? This is like saying I notice men engaged in dv, so I shouldn't date.
In my late twenties I have come to realize that as an introvert who rarely ever goes out other than going to the gym or doing the groceries, and also isn't a handsome 6ft+ tall guy, there is just a lack of options for a lot of guys. As a guy if you're on the shorter side and not particularly photogenic, apps are a complete waste of time. On top of that, with so many jobs being work from home nowadays, if going out regularly is not part of your lifestyle you're just not going to ever meet anyone.
Cole seems to split up the male and female problems and ignores that they are related to each other. Sure, if society were great and women were mostly mentally healthy and interested in relationships then Coles take would be justified. He is in one section of society and looks at a different section of society. And then he says the other section should behave as he does and they are to blame for the lack of success. In a way he is right but also not really.
Also by now the men and the women want different things from a relationship and they are taught by society to only focus on those aspects.
@@benrex7775 I agree with some of his arguments but he completely ignores the female factor. No matter how successful, outgoing or in shape you are....each woman has a dozen disqualifiers that reduce your chances and none of them are the same. You could wear the wrong shirt that day and that's it, you lost your chance. Women are in fact picky.
I don't live online, I'm successful and in shape. Now It can be argued that I spend too much time working and not enough going out but guess what...If I don't work for that success I'm immediately disqualified. It's a catch 22 and I'm just not interested in dancing to anyone's tune like a performing clown so I opted out years ago.
Hobbies. I met my partner when neither of us were looking. We were just enjoying our lives and living our best lives. You cannot lose when you do things for you, even if you don't get a gf, you'd get a new hobbies and potentially new friends
@@wsrtwetr Wise words, but it has to be noted that you need to pick hobbies that allow you to meet people. I was super introverted and had plenty of hobbies, but I tended to always engage in solo hobbies.
"Not going to play someone elses saved game."😂😂
"Looks don't matter, but they do." -Almost Every Woman Ever. That I think is part of the major issue, is 90% of the time a woman won't just tell someone who is interested they aren't interested in them due to looks. They instead keep saying looks don't matter to not be "rude," which then puts them in a spiral of thinking they have mental problems or it's something else to fix instead or working on the real issue.
But if women straight up said the guy was ugly to his face she would be called a bitch. Looks matter to everyone not just women.
@@willprotector no men actually tell you that looks matter
@@willprotector Difference is, men honest _and_ are willing to compromise, females arent and that makes all the difference
@@willprotector Maybe you're like that but men in general do admit looks matter. When has that ever not been the case?
It's not about not being rude. Saying someone's personality is shit is way ruder than saying they are ugly. The reason people don't tell the truth is all about avoiding looking shallow.
majority of incels just state the truth that they have a hard time finding someone when they're not what's considered conventionally attractive atm and people are "hiring after experience" while also saying being a virgin "doesn't matter".
saying they're not liking women having freedom is heavily missconstruing what they're saying.
it's like saying "oh you're lonely? so then you wanna force someone to marry you? rape them? you're a bad person" it's insane.
This is what they believe
@@mealovesyu Some of them may, but I think it's a bad interpretation of the exact words.
@@mealovesyu You're a doofus.
@@mealovesyu That logic is the same as saying "All f-nists want all men to die.". The fact that some do doesn't mean that's the opinion of them all or required for them to be one.
@@theworstcatholic7247 it’s the opinion of the vast majority and they don’t do anything to push back against this rhetoric. Comparing it to feminism won’t make me recant my statement.
30 years old virgin guy and never really cared about dating. I think people put too much pressure on themselves and think that if they dont / cant find someone to date or be with they feel like they've failed.
Gigachad
But how in 30 years have you at least not gotten laid outside dating it's not even hard
@@MisfitMatt For me loneliness brings me joy
26 year old virgin dude here. I feel the same as you. You are not alone
@@harambe4267 not false
It's funny when people say self esteem is why we are incels. "Anything is possible if you just try or believe!" Alrighty then, I'm gonna start flapping my arms... Huh, I'm not flying. I guess this world has limits and not every creature can fly.
That's why you are responsible for building your own self esteem. Do things that you want that make you happy. Whether it's a hobby or something you are passionate about. That's how you build self esteem. Self esteem cannot be given to you and no amount of women can fix the problem you have with yourself.
We spend all day working, we spend all day in exclusionary social bubbles, our society is setup in a way that makes natural social interaction obtuse or non-existent. We use things like dating apps because were too busy to actually be able to go out and socialize like many people in other countries do. Dating apps turn dating into a competitive market place. Forcing people to turn them selves into commodities, products to be sold instead of human beings with emotions, interests, dreams, etc. We feel so disengaged with each other and society because it's being robbed of the human element. People have things to offer past their appearance and a few lines in a bio but we aren't provided alternative opportunities to do so.
This is exactly how I feel but could never put in words, you've said it perfectly thank you!
What about cold approaching? I've never been that good at it but you've gotta get you're reps in somewhere. Even when you get rejected it still feels better to get how you feel off your chest than it does to just ignore it.
and if your field dont really have women your chances to meet someone will drop like crazy xD
Andrew gets it! Well said.
True, society doesnt help. However at the end of the day, you control your own actions. You can take different decisions in life, rather than going with the society. The thing is, it's alot harder
'you dont want to play someone elses saved game.' LOL i had a big laugh over this one. Never heard that comparison before, but damn is it funny and accurate.
it's pretty harsh and I feel bad for women that are refered to as such. everybody deserves to find their own happiness.
Well then you can’t get mad if women say the same thing. If you can not date women because they’ve been with other men than others women can choose not to date you for the same reason. Or really any ransoms arbitrary thing you place ridiculous value on.
Can’t get mad if a women says she doesn’t date short men because that has the same value as, a woman has been with other men.
Let's be real.. Saying shit like this is a big cope because they are invisible in the dating market anyways so men will say anything to justify not wanting to date women
this is an old quote lol
@@Arasia_Valentia In fairness the quote relates to them having children with another partner not the fact they have had prior partners.
The #1 rule is that if you find yourself crushing on a girl so hard you can't even communicate, you have to recognize that it will never be a thing and you have to mentally let that s**t go and MOVE ON. All relationships, platonic or romantic, start with communication. Practice talking and listening and the friends and partners will follow.
THIS! ❤
I find people are usually decent at the talking part, even shy people in 1 on 1 or small settings. It's more the listening part that people struggle with more today. No one tells anyone they need to shut up and just listen anymore.
I don't think there are many guys who are "too shy to talk to their crushes". There may be guys who act awkward in front of their crushes but the other thing is just a holywood stereotype.
@@TheBayzent What if you never had a crush?
It virtually never happened to me lmao. Never got to stutter or run away from someone out of love. Like, what fucking emotion or biological mechanism is running in your brain for it to malfunction? x)))
''If you're short, you're fucked!''
Me, as 5'3-5'4 guy: ''You know what? Single life is underrated. Not like I wanted kisses and hugs and cuddles or anything...''.
Just get a teddy. Best hugs no judgement and he’s always there for you
@@j0nnyismthere's a fine line between teddy and body pillow. I say just come to terms with life and obla di oblada ur life away
Imagine me I'm a Dutch guy, abroad I keep hearing. " Omg you're so short, I thought you all were 6'5" ( I am 5'9 )
My height never really bothered me, my friends are literally gigantic compared to me but idc.
It does hurt e little that most people think dutchie are all giants
I had a woman who I really liked. Quite funny, intelligent(or so i thought), same morals/values for the important things for the most part. Great company, and was very intimate.
She broke off the relationship after about 1.5 years because she wanted her first love to be the kind of love that the movies show. Where you bump into someone at a starbucks, and a glance or two is all you need to feel flustered. You start chatting over a coffee, exchange numbers, and you have a few dates in dimly lit restaurants, and the walks in the park at midnight together. a wild romantic life with travels and spontaneous romantic gestures like flowers, and picnics. That's pretty much what she said to me. It's been a few years, but it was clear she wanted a movie romance and to be treated like an absolute princess.
I think she just never had the butterflies with me, despite really liking me. And she told this to me after she met a guy that did this to her. The twist to the story is that I knew this guy, he was abusive and volatile. Even told her and warned her, showing her his past criminal record(was in jail twice for a few weeks due to this) Was told I was just being jealous, and that she was a grown woman and could do what she wanted without me 'controlling' her. Within a few weeks she had moved in with him. Last time I heard from her was that she was in the hospital getting stitches. She had phoned me up to ask if I could pick her up.
I declined.
This led me to changing my mindset towards relationships permanently. If people are willing to throw away a year or two of a relationship with someone over something like this, I respect myself more than to let myself be subject to that, and I respect myself enough to not let myself be that guy who's always going to save her from her own choices.
This guy has zero idea what's actually happening with dating these days. Yes, there's lots of guys who are undesirable for various reasons of their own doing, but so many men have checked out because of situations like this. You give dating a go 3 or 4 times, only to have someone doing something like this, or screaming at you, or freaking out over stupid things. Or who decline you when you start showing interest in them. The people in the dating pool in America are just awful. It's just a logical thing. If the relationship is too much work or stress, and it happens multiple times. Guys just check out eventually.
Many men have given dating a try. But rejection after rejection after bad relationship just leads them to eventually check out. Most men are fine being alone so they'll embrace it. It's also why so many of these Men are going to other countries to find wives now, because what they value is drastically different than a huge amount of women in NA.
Wait, gotta have the obligatory "oh you're just an incel, lol" comment. Quota filled.
Some women can definitely have this effect on men, but that doesn't mean they are all like that. Just like how a woman might date someone like your friend and assume all guys are like that. It only becomes true if you give up and accept that it will always be that way. Truth is that it's not easy to find good people to have a relationship with, but they do exist and if you give up then you will never find them
@@padarousou I'm not sure the point of this.
I didn't say that all women are like this, but after trying 5, 6, 7, 8 times and getting nothing but shit thrown at you. Most people just quit. Not worth the headache.
@@truckywuckyuwu In your post it sounded like you had a relationship with 1 bad apple and you said it "changed my mindset towards relationships permanently". If it gets that bad every single time, then it may be because you are contributing to it in a way you may be overlooking, or you are looking for relationships in the wrong places. Good people maybe hard to find, but there should be plenty of relatively normal people in between, they aren't all bad
@@padarousou 1 bad apple was enough to tell me that I should be looking for an orange, not an apple.
That's what it changed.
Being short is like playing dating on nightmare difficulty, but in my experience that's the best way to play. I have been married to an absolute legend for over 12 years now and I'm so grateful that having to try harder meant I found someone less shallow.
5'4 here and married as well. Just cause you play on nightmare difficulty doesn't mean you can't beat the game, just gotta work harder and get luckier than most. I also feel that being less conventionally attractive allowed me to meet a better woman who loves me for myself.
@kalebisalwaysright it only matters when you are tall and handsome
@@pat103196but what if you play on ultra nightmare digiculty ?
@kalebisalwaysright Same, it just doesn't make you filtered out in the beginning but they invent the next best thing that isn't perfect, I'm 6'2"
@kalebisalwaysright Just because it didn't help you doesn't mean it doesn't help at all. You can still be socially re--tarded or have other problems. The fact is women do filter men out by height. You're like my tall friend, he still doesn't get any because he's basically autistic and doesn't know how to talk like a normal person.
Me when I have a girlfriend: "I wanna play vidya until 1am. I'm gonna be so bored at this event. I want my autonomy back."
Me when I don't have a girlfriend: "I need cuddles and I love you whispers or I'm gonna jump off a bridge."
There is no winning. I don't pretend it's anyone else's fault.
Gamer girlfriend.
humans nature that"s all when you have something it became worthless with time x) thanks Lao Tzu to have said that 2500 years ago he knew how bad we are x)
Nah that’s not me it’s about balance lol. When you get a gf you gotta know what you’re signing up for. Healthy relationship: make time for yourself and your partner. That’s the key. One fault of human nature is how hard it is for us to truly compromise for others
@@MrDarkneah Yes, we assume grass is always greener on the other side. It's an evolutionary baggage we have
@@godspeedhero3671 Very rare and unrealistic.
It's actually really easy to get laid as a man, only two steps to take.
1. Be attractive
2. Don't be unattractive
There’s a lot of unattractive people in relationships
3. Don’t be short
Don’t forget the three 6’s.
@@MireVale genetical data show-casing 60% of men do not reproduce begs to differ. Only 40% of men get to pass on their genes.
@@MireValeCompletely true but, most of those people are disproportionately women. Men are just more likely to be single and childless for life. We all have around 2 to 2.5x as many female ancestors. Apart of the oppression of being a man is just the realistic possibility of never meeting anyone.
Bro this popped up on my feed at the worst time 😅 This made my day though. This hits too close to home. I've had a hard time with dating and relationships. I've gotten rejected and shut down and I've been so sad. I've gotta get out of my head and start talking to people again, and I'm glad I'm not the only one who struggles with this. I've also gotten therapy too which has really helped with my social anxiety. Focusing on my mental health has done wonders to my self esteem.
Metal health and getting to know yourself are very useful, but also realizing reject ain't shit really. When you realize you can just stop putting so much time into a build up to saying "hey I like you" and just do it when you know it, yeah, if you get rejected you have a whole lot less emotional attachment and you begin to realize there are "a lot of fish in the sea." Move on, find someone else, done.
Your not alone bro just coming back from the bar zero for 3 tonight it happens - But at least I didn't hook up with another Bi Polar girl I seem to be a magnet to them for some reason. And just some friendly advice if you do meet a Bi Polar girl just run in the opposite direction you will thank me for this advice...:)
If you haven't already, start exercising and I guarantee it will help with your mental health too. Being unhealthy compounds mental health issues. A stable sleep schedule, exercise, and eating healthy do wonders. I know it sounds cliché, but that's because it's 100% true
Good luck! Just remember that things take time, and you are worth the effort you put in!❤
@@devon8363 Stable sleep schedule? I haven't had a good night's sleep in a long time. I haven't had a girlfriend in even longer. Gotta better myself, but right now I'm just focused on trying to get a job. It's hard out here for a lonely man with no tribe.
My youngest sister is tallish for a woman (5'9") and was very embarrassed/ insecure about it. She used to only date guys that were taller than her - and ended up dating douchebags.
I pointed out that she was discounting a huge population of guys who might be kind and sweet and good partners based on something they couldn't control - just like she can't control how tall she was. Anyway - she got married last week to a very devoted short king! Sometimes perspective is all we need to make better choices.
@@---nu4ed and also the brother didn't said to the poor short guy that she was dating the worst garage human created
Respect. What matters is what makes both sides happy and at peace. Congrats to them!
Aaaw, good for your sis and her husband. I know that there are picky women out there, picky people in general, but people also don't realize a sort of guilt that comes with our insecurities when relationships are brought up.
I myself have this sort of idea. Although I absolutely no experience with men, due to not being interested until college and not being anyone's type now, if by some miracle of God anyone does ever find some interest in me I would much rather the guy not be skinny because I am overweight.
I am on a weight loss journey but that sort of thing takes time. I wouldn't want to project my insecurities of my weight onto anyone and being around a guy who is skinny would just make me look larger than I actually am and I would feel bad for him because there are plenty of skinny girls he could be with.
Luckily no one is interested in me so I don't have to worry about that and I can just keep focusing on improving myself. Sure it may never be enough for anyone to ever love me romantically, but I'll like myself alot more and my life will improve someway regardless 🤷🏾♀️
She settle for a beta after having all of her fun with real man it's depressing
@@vanarqwq3660 I didn't realize people think being cheated on/lied to is fun. And she didn't "settle" - she adores him. You don't know either of them - you're just spinning the narrative to match your already bleak world view.
It blows my mind people really think incels are going "man im a virgin whose never had a girl at 25 i wish i could finally get a girl.... BUT SHE HAS TO HAVE HUGE TITS FAT ASS AND BE MY SLAVE" like bro its so stupid i would understand thats what you think about younger guys but how tf do you assume thats all incels that dont get any attention from girls at an older age? So many guys wish they could get any girl but everyone assumes they have insane standards
The standards are only insane and unrealistic for men like us.
We're not allowed to have standards really now that I think about it, they don't us being able to have a choice at all.
well... i don't think that, at least... i mean, for a nearly 27 year old with a V card, i actually dislike the idea of "big assets"... if anything the actual only things i even care about is if they smoke, (since i have asthma, so it could actually kill me) and if they have a good personality that wouldn't borderline torture me... like... that's it...
@Mew2Win well so far i ve yet to encounter the blackpill concepts being disproven, i agree with most of them even though i refuse to follow it s doctrine/doomer outlook
Most of them don't think like that, you're delusional
@@jacobmansfield-go9fz don't think like what? (I'm just confused.)
I totally agree with what Asmon said about reality and online life becoming integrated together. Its becoming more and more common everywhere I go to see both men and women staring at their phones and various other media. Online is becoming reality. Best advice, learn to love yourself for who you are, and have fun with life!
Very vague advice. A more specific answer would be, get off the dang phone
True, online dating used to be laughed at if you did it, now its 100% normal
For me dating was a no go because men only treated me like an accomplishemnt. The moment a man treated me like a human being, and we discovered hobbies we loved together, i chose him. He is hilarious, 5'7 with a dad bod and now we have a son together, and are a gaming family.
Damn im single but i thank god everyday im not a 5'7 manlet
@@tryharderpls that 5,7 guy doesnt sleep alone at night so guess hes winning.
@@tryharderpls i laughed at that , even though im 5'6 lmao
@@LumberJacked89 Lmao true.
sooo .. why do you guys live my dream?
One of my favorite high school teachers was on the short side. 70% of the kids where taller than her. People would try to make fun of her height, but she would always keep her head up and say I’m not short I’m fun sized. I talked to her I lot while I was in highschool. She helped me get over my confidence problems which led to my first GF. Didn’t last long as it wasn’t working out but I at least knew I can do it. The teacher always helped her students even if it wasn’t the subject she taught and even if it wasn’t school related. She helped a kid out who was getting bullied by their brother. Kept the kid from committing suicide. When the school themselves refused to help the kid. So sad they forced her to retire the year after I graduated. She was the best teacher I’ve ever had.
“I’m not small I’m fun sized”. Kinda weird that she was saying that to underaged kids lol
Fun sized, I like that. A friend of mine says she is not easy, she is cooperative (works better in native tounge, kinda rimes).
@@implodingllama2092 I think she meant fun person lol. But I'd be definitely thinking thats what she meant if she was young enough and attractive enough while I was in high school
.....but nobody cares about a woman being short haha. Actually I think most men prefer it.
@@hellasketch6523 yeah, I was rolling my eyes the whole read.
I was unemployed and in a pretty low spot when I got my first gf, and it ended up being a healthy long term relationship. And thats simply because we were both genuine, upfront, and willing to accept being wrong. We didnt take offense to each other pointing out flaws in each other, rather viewing it as the other person cared and was something to improve, even if initially either of us might not see it as an issue we truly had. The first instinct was to improve, not to defend ourselves. Both of us were far from perfect, but I think that its a mentality that a lot of people need to learn.
What ended up happening?
@@xXxMouthxXx both my parents and hers were real pieces of shit to the maximum degree in different ways. In this case it was hers (I had cut contact with my parents by this point) who took an immediate dislike to me, because I'm far from what would be considered a normal person. I tried to reach out to them countless times, cuz I really did want them to accept me and talk so we could understand each other, but they never wanted to talk. From what I heard, because it was a long distance relationship, they didnt expect it to be serious or last long. But it did. And after over a year of us being happily together, they forcefully deleted all of her accounts, took away her devices, and told horrid lies about me to all of her friends so they wouldnt talk to me. But one of them doubted them and did eventually talk to me, which is how I know these things. There was obviously nothing this casual friend could do though, since her parents had also told the lies to the other parents of the friends. And these were blatant, despicable, not even remotely true lies. True evil shit.
I'm not gonna trauma dump in a fucking youtube comment section, but my life up to that point had been hell in every way you can imagine, and needless to say this fucked my mind up entirely to nearly the point of insanity. But I'm supposed to be able to go into a residential psych treatment center later this month, so hopefully that helps at least some.
Anyway, we were both people with lots of problems in rough spots. But we took responsibility for our flaws, admitted when we were wrong, and focused on helping each other. We would point out things the other did wrong all the time, but it wasnt taken in offence since we knew it was fair and the other really cared. So, although it was taken out of our hands, it was still as good as it could have possibly been while it lasted. It was hard at times, but we blamed ourselves first for our own issues and improved. Thats really fuckin important in a relationship, to discard personal pride and be fully ready to work on your own problems.
that's why i always am skeptical when peoples go-to solution is "improve yourself first", they have no idea how motivating is being on a relationship because they never saw the difference
My men, you have found the secret in getting a gf. The ability to take responsibility and self reflect.
I always say I’m so glad I grew up in the 90s. Just late enough to start getting good tech but also remember the world before cell phones and internet being everywhere.
@Dale Paget it didnt really start to become a thing until Netscape and AOL. that was around '96 and even then I remember barely anybody used it. It started taking off when Ebay did.
I remember the early 2000s when you had to use dial up to even have the internet and you used to have to pay to call anyone outside of your area code. It's crazy to think that was over 20 years ago now.
Very true ! i was born in 1990 and i think it was pretty much the perfect spawn 😎I feel bad for the kids these days...
Man miss the 90s. I had my Sega genesis and my skateboard and that's all I needed in life til I went to my first PC café at 11 years old and got hard-core addicted to counter-strike 1.0
Yea I’m 35 and beyond grateful to have experienced a childhood that was not overrun by technology. It’s incredible how diff. my childhood was from age 10-21 vs someone in current times. When I was in 8th grade computers hit our school (the big back colorful apples) and basic Nokia phones lol
I’ve just given up on dating because I’m not sure where to find a middle aged woman that’s into video games, watching RUclipsrs talk about or play video games, and watching cartoons. I can adult and hold a job and pay my bills, but in my free time I’m a homebody with “childish” interests and hobbies. Plus I’ve gotten used to and actually enjoy the peace and quiet of living alone with my two cats and doing whatever the heck I want whenever I want without having to take anyone else’s wants and desires into consideration.
Conventions or other hobbies?
I remember there used to be speed dating and speed friending events at cons I used to go to!
tbh conventions is where i met my girl. im exactly like you, responsible adult, can pay my bills ect ect, but i also go to conventions and meetups with similar interest since i play video games + watch anime.
Comic con?Pax? They're even dating events for nerds.
Yeah, the biggest problem I have with dating and meeting new people in general is also similar. It feels like going out to meet new people is going to make me meet people who are the opposite of me. People like me are going to be on their computer like I am. So basically, unless I decide to break into people's houses, that isn't gonna happen.
Okay, so you know that you live the life of a manchild, and that you could use real friends and be more responsible with your short time on earth, but you don't. Because you're used to the low-effort lifestyle of being a shut-in and a loser. That's fine if you want to be that way. But stop lying to yourself. You want to stay in the safe convenience of being a loser with no friends. I just don't understand why people post stuff like this. Like if you were actually cool with being alone you wouldn't have to let everyone know that you've "gotten used to and actually enjoy the peace and quiet". Something tells me that quiet is getting a little bit hard to bear.
If you want my advice, I would really consider ditching the cats (they're too much work anyway right?) and finding more meaningful hobbies and friendships/connections with people. Everyone I know who played videogames as a hobby just got burned out on them and found it just depressed them after a while. Watching content isn't necessarily bad, but what about your physical health? How are you maintaining your intellectual prowess? Do you have a faith or religion? How are you strengthening that? What is your goal in your job for the future? Are you chasing a career or what? Why not consider helping out young men? What is your purpose for being alive? Why bother with any of this?
Not to get too autistic about the minutia and maybe I'm missing something but you see what I mean. These are questions that an ADULT would ask themselves. And these are things that ADULTS, who are normal, have sorted out for themselves. For whatever reason, maybe it's mental problems or the easy distractions, but you, apparently, are incapable of being curious about anything that actually matters. And you're a p*ssy. But that's fine. Because you're totally okay with that right? Because you have f*cking cats and a tv.
I am a short, balding dude. When I hear one more person say "just be more confident" I am going to lose my shit. Women are shallow, and I am not attractive to them, it's just what it is. The Tinder percentage for women is also kind of skewed, since the rest is in a relationship or "situationship" / friends with benefits, and they do not need Tinder and co. Those are still the same women with the same mindset, like the ones who use Tinder. Instagram is also a dating app nowadays, and basically all women use it. The video is lacking some detailed perspectives on these things.
It's worse than portrait in his video.
Skill issue
I ain't reading all that
@@cheefqueef6494 And yet you comment
Woah dude, c'mon, look at this: *Shows picture of 1 in 100,000 case of hot woman dating ugly bald guy*. See, this ultra-rare occurrence means looks don't matter! /sarcasm
more like "*people* are shallow"
I myself, as a young adult guy who's a 6/10 (or maybe a 4) I would never date a girl who isn't at least a 7.
And I'm convinced that that doesn't make me shallow, it's just how attraction works for most people. Does animal attraction work with shallow mechanisms? Yes, but it isn't news, it's just what it is.
Can you ignore that? Not really, you're gonna end up keeping a relationship with a partner you aren't attracted to ... how would that even work??
You can't judge people for rejecting offers they're not really attracted to.
I'm 42 now, and have been engaged to my guy since 2018. As a artist, karate person, gamer girl, and someone who's cosplayed (I still kinda do, lol), I intermingled with the gamer/nerd crowd a lot over the years, and encountered TONS of "incels" while trying to find a guy. The doom and gloom attitude, and aura they gave off was a #1 turn off for me. Just that attitude put them in the friend zone for me. I was also single until age 33, other than a few brief relationships before that. I had the doom and gloom/lonely mindset myself for awhile, and didn't meet the right guy until I had gotten over that. Negativity is a HUGE turn off. It will either attract a negative/weak partner who's just as insecure as you are (if not worse), or keep you alone. It's definitely important to be a FULL person with something to give of yourself, before chasing after someone else.
Rejection is my biggest fear, I spent 22-26 hanging out with a girl and the entire time I never told her how I felt. I told myself I'd tell her when I got the perfect body but that never happened and eventually she stopped asking me to hangout. Also when I first met her I asked the internet for advice and after posting a pic of myself everyone told me it was over, hit the gym, that I was a 1/10 and that I had no chance which caused me to hurt myself, starve myself and spent 90% of the day crying for years.
Brutal, buddy boyo, my condolences. Are you at least doing better now?
Awe hun. ❤️ I see you.
damn man sometimes i thank god i never fell in love with someone
She thought you were her friend you just wanted to fuck her, of course he doesn't want to speak to you. You lied to her and betrayed her trust
@@j.d.s.1837 yeah I've actually gotten a few dates over the last few years which I thought was impossible for me because people online told me it was impossible
This guy's video is great, just one addition/fix to this comment: "If you get rejected, figure out what you did wrong and move on." - This isn't always accurate. Sometimes, you did nothing wrong. You were just a victim of circumstance. The person you are pursuing might not be looking for someone at the moment, they are interested in someone else, etc. Some things are just out of your hands. Do what you can to learn, but don't dwell on the "Why" you were rejected.
Thats what he meant by figuring why 😄
Sometimes you just did nothing wrong, even if you get rejected in very unpleasant manner, sometimes it's the person you wanted to ask out. We are all humans, the girl you want to ask out can also be an asshole
The majority of rejections have nothing to with your behavior and everything to do with your looks and status.
You can learn something from EVERY situation. Even if the rejection was 100% out of your control, there’s still knowledge to be gained from the experience
@@Krelian4400Are you using that information as an excuse or an avenue to improve yourself?
Yeah, it's all too real. Very complex situation....it's not just social awkwardness. I'm 40 and never had a girlfriend because when I had the best opportunity, I never took it. The only reason I'm not a virgin......was because I decided to pay for it to see what it was like in my 30's and it remains one of my biggest regrets in life. I have a job as a manager, and I'm a licensed pilot too. I certainly was fit 5'10" and good looking until Covid hit. I was such a failure in dating I had to go involve myself in the "pickup community" to learn to have fun and how to interact with women. But that got very tiring for an introvert because I felt like I constantly had to "be someone else" in order to attract women, and it just wasn't sustainable. Being called an "in-cel" is pretty accurate of me now....I don't feel like I could live with anyone now in my life, and I feel like I have difficulty forming emotional connections with people. I've always hated online dating, and the 'few' dates I've had I got from speed dating or public pickup. Obviously there's much more that can be said, and it's not something surface level, but this is just a short paragraph. There are tons of rationalizations I put in my head to try and live with it. Heck, any time I got 'close' to something I reached a limit of "unexplored territory" and I scared myself off by sabotaging the situation. There was once where I could have actually taken home a one-night-stand, and the moment I realised that, I sabotaged and ran away. One big no-no? Trying to date at work.....living with the consequence of failure / embarassment not worth it. I was VERY much in that mode he gives advice on near the end of the video......but it was short lived and hard to continue.
why losing your virginity to a escort was your biggest regret in life??
As a dude thats 5’6” I can attest to this. I was very athletic though and I do have a compact frame so it was easy for me to put on muscle. Staying active in the sports and the gym helped me stay in good shape which helped me have different relationships with girls/women. Confidence is key, but obviously, and just as you stated, money is one of the biggest driving factors too.
Confidence is bottom tier skill, it doesn't get you sh!t if you don't have the other things right.
fr I fucking hate all these people saying "confidence is the most important bro". Like no, when attractive people are unconfident they're shy and humble@@al-imranadore1182
Asmon so supportive… watches the sponsor and helps the guy out while telling people it’s gonna be tough af if they’re ugly lmao
but its the truth and not some nice lie like all those positivity posts that are just straight up bs and unrealistic
Totally agree with "looking at the right place".
If a girl doesn't like me, she's not worth my time anyways.
lowering standards is wrong, you either like someone or you don't, don't go for the girls you feel unsure or feel like something is lacking. It loses the point of relationship if you go for something unsure just because you feel insecure and think you can't have better or its your only chance to get a girl, at least for me it's just better to be alone then go for something i am unsure i like.
That’s true for a woman. Men don’t and shouldn’t operate under that mindset. As a man you should approach as many women as possible until you are successful. If you’re looking for the perfect woman all the time you’re going to be disappointed
@@ILoveGrilledCheese I highly disagree.
@@ILoveGrilledCheese Nah. His advice is perfect. For men too. Then again I guess it's all about what you want out of a relationship. But I'd rather be single than be with someone who makes me feel lonely.
THIS! So much this! Being in a relationship should be something wonderful, something that adds to both people! It should be something where both have a legitimate interest in keeping it going, and you can't have that if you're willing to knowingly settle for second-best. Either you have perfect chemistry and it sparks or it doesn't. And if it doesn't, then don't do it. I am perfectly comfortable with trying, failing, waiting, and seeing and holding out for that one moment where fate smiles down on me and keeping an open heart and mind until then. And I think that's the best choice a guy or girl can make.
@@ILoveGrilledCheese this is 100% how you get taken advantage of by manipulators and then the birth of another woman hating incel is upon us cause of 1 bad egg.
22:40 yep! Mariage rates had to do A LOT with social norms. My grand mother told me that an unmarried woman was view suspiciously in the 50s and even the 60s. A married man had WAY more chances of landing a better paying job. An unmarried woman had an extremely difficult time getting a mortgage or even opening a bank account. Being married was also a badge of honor… They were now normal functioning members of society. And your correlation with money is bogus. Most people who got married in the 40s, 50s, 60s and 70s had nothing but the clothes on their back. Honeymoon ? 🤣 Most people resumed their lives the very next day for their tiny salaries. My parents spent the weekend in a local hotel ffs.
lol, this is a trend now, I'm 29 and still virgin, nothing new here. But the thing that surprises me the most is that people actually think that being virgin is worse than being a whore.
Hang in there brah, we're all gonna make it one day
Damn dude i thought me being a virgin till 25 was bad, I honestly got lucky but damn man that’s gotta hurt. Hope things get better
This May i would be 30 years old and still virgin, you are not alone
@@zombiekila187what do you mean better? Not virgin>virgin? Why?
@@zerrouksidali1959Same here. I just got 30 this month. Still single and virgin as well.
Why the shit is being single such a bad thing? I literallyhave no desire to deal with someone else's bullshit every single day. I go out and party and whatnot, talk to peopleon and offline, but i have 0 interest in being bound to someone. Their problems becoming mine just is not appealing to me whatsoever.
It’s not a bad thing if you want it. Its only bad for those who don’t want to be single.
Amen
As a black, 6'2 incel with a micropenis which apparently is rare, I have to say you had an interesting take. Last time I dated was back in 2015 and it was what it was. Lost my virginity late and yeah you realize damn I dont live up to the stereotypes adult films or society say I'm supposed to. I'm an empath so when I see videos from blackpilled, whitepilled, or redpilled creators I both feel sorry to the guys in a worse position than myself but envious of those on the end of the spectrum. The thing alot of men need to take away from these communities is that holding onto resent and hate does not make sense. I was 21 when I attempted deletion and I came out the other side. At 33 life is in a much better place. I dont date but I am planning on going into fatherhood alone. I always wanted to be a father and the career advancement I have worked hard on over the years has put me in a position to do that when I read 35/36. I hear being a single parent is not ideal, but for the kind of woman i would ideally want she doesnt exist. No hatred towards women from me, but it is what it is. Just have to go about things yourself. Adoption or a surrogate. Whether you are incel, volcel, outcel or whatever just know that you are a man and try to either improve on yourself or just make the most of the resources around you. God bless and great video!
@@Psilocybin77 Thank you!
Inspiring words my friend. I have the same feelings as you even though i’ve just barely turned 20. I really really want to be a father at some point but I just… don’t see myself together with a woman with the same wishes in this day and age. I’m just so horribly down because of how many unlucky situations I had involving girls, it’s just so hard for me. I hope you are able to do it and find happiness in fatherhood. Bless you ❤
@@Adrianirl Thank you and God bless!
thank you for the honesty! ...that's refreshing on the internet
@@theLowestPointInMyLife As one it feels like ending things at times makes sense. Small and black...wow I failed.
And its only going to increase
Personally,ive given up as i had a really bad experience despite doing my best to provide everything, i still got abused and eventualy cheated on. Women are not worth it if youre not part of the top percent of men. And even then, they have to watch out too, as any allegation is enough for them to lose money. All in all, it took some time, and though occasionallyi suffer from the pangs of loneliness and craving a relationship, ive come to mostly be at peace with the fact ill never find a woman who wont use and abuse me like all the others, and that im valuing my dignity and mental health over women
Do not sacrifice your mental health,wealth, and dignity over women. Let them all fight over the top men and dont get involvedwith that mess. Let women be miserable alone, and NEVER give them a chance. You come first, before any woman wholl drain you from everything and leave you a broken shell of yourself.
Never commit
"Who got rid of 1 guy having 6 wives" - the other 5 guys without any left obviously
i didn't get if that was a joke of if he genuinely wants to go back to those times
Best advice for getting friends and eventually a girlfriend: Find things you like doing that are in public. That’s it. Museums, bird watching, sports, church, whatever. Other people will congregate to those places and you’ll have opportunities to talk to them. Obviously some places have higher potential for finding single women than others.
Bro i swear all these mfs have tried is tinder and give up. Literally talking to real people makes this ship happen 100x easier.
As a single woman who loves museums, all I can say is YES.
Tbh the real tip is to not pursue dating like it's a hobby or something, let's face it that's fucking weird and a true no lifer. You'll be noticed as someone forcing it, being greedy, needy, desperate, creepy, ect.
Like you said, hobbies and doing things you like will get you noticed and people will be interested in your hobbies. That's how you get conversations started most of the time anyways. Met alot of people doing things I find fun, though I don't date, still have had people ask me out or at least make new friends who are within those same hobbies. People fear the "oh so scary freindzone" but when those friends invite you out places or to other interesting things then you meet more people who might be interested in you or you're interested in them.
If you're not out with people then you're not gonna get a date very easily. I would say online dating but that's an entire catfishing or scammers mess from what I've heard, never tried it probably never will.
@@whoahanant desperation is universally unappealing so yeah 100 on that.
Feel like I would just be "Pablo Escobar meme" all over the town.
Hey man, I don’t watch you for your WoW content because I don’t play WoW. But I subbed a while back because you have un-ironically good way to deconstruct ideas and formulate them into smaller chunks of information so that the general laymen can understand. Keep it up!
What? No he doesn’t lmao. He just says basic shit any moron could come up with.
interesting. I don't play video games, and I don't agree with a lot of what asmon says, but he has some sort of captivating charisma that really drags you in.
@@Tailionis tf is wrong w you?
@@jcon2060 I also don’t agree with Asmon 100% of the time. I think it’s healthy to disagree with people about topics. But he does have charisma, if he doesn’t no one would watch him.
I come for his cooking show
I personally believe the use of the word rejection alone implants a negative connotation to the outcome of the event and breeds unhealthy resentments, as long as youre fully secure and confident within yourself that wont be an issue but if it is then try see it as a lack of compatability. You just werent compatable for each other.
Some women reject in a pretty vicious way. That way you need to be really secure to not subconsciously add those negative connotations.
The guy that made this video is super coping. The divorce rate is dropping because the marriage rate is dropping. Not only with the laws that focus on being heavily anti man, and the solid terrifying reality that one day she can just leave, take what i have and hold my children hostage. The attitude that women have now is terrible too. They think helping people you supposedly love is somehow slavery. Its just madness. Why risk everything when theres nothing to gain?
On that second part I just wanna add how dumb it is they want to say it's empowering to ditch staying home to take care of kids and instead go on to work for a man that doesn't give a shit about them for minimum wage how tf does that make sense
@@ryukobestwaifu3319fr fr no need to do that if a man is already bringing in cash. unfortunately tho with how high prices are in america a bunch of families need both men and women working to provide a stable income
Bro is Blue Pilled, we all know there are Women that have bad intentions and there's a few good Women out there.
@@ryukobestwaifu3319 But men also go on to work for a man that doesn't give a shit about them for minimum wage whats the difference? Everyone has to work.
The main thing is that women are sick of working full time while also having to come home and do the job of a full time SAHM. Even if they make more money. 2 whole generations watched their mothers do this and said no thanks.
I don't want to be horny. I just want to be happy.
Then you need to be happy on your own first
@berrymint6486 i'm pretty sure he already did my guy he's talking about relationships and being happy with someone who doesn't treat him like an object which i pray he do
If you cannot find someone; you shall be single forever. The Lord is telling you to devote yourself to him, like the Apostle Paul.
Correct bro, I don't need lust at all I want is LOVE
And for that reason games > girlfriend
Amount of sexless men: *starts increasing after 2008*
League of Legends: *being released in 2009*
Coincidence? I THINK NOT.
@@JayceCH. Yes they are single player games are too but ironically your probably less single if you play more single player games
ik its a joke but games being the cause for sexlessness seems a bit of a reach
i know a few guys who game eat junk food and get a new gf every few months
GFC ruined everything we haven't recovered
@@gamercreature2587 naw single player games r just better and can't be taken away from us 😉
No, it was Mass Effect, Dragon Age Origins and Fallout New Vegas
15:00
this is called "warehouse syndrome"
it's when you're working in a warehouse, with just a bunch of dirty dudes
and the corporate chick, who is a 5/10 at best in the real-world walks in, but in that environment she's a 10/10 because she's the only chick
I have this doomer mentality more about the state of the world than I do about my interpersonal relationships. Hard to look at things happening locally nationally or globally and actually feel like trying or forcing a kid to exist here. I'll just exist minimally until I dont. unless something drastic happens.
That's a respectable life-philosophy...a certain nihilism is a sign of maturity...but, don't forget to enjoy life...
I have pretty much the same outlook. I had enough problems with my childhood, let alone my adult problems. If I had kids I bet they would likely inherit my same problems to at least some extent. Life would likely be a bitch to them also, so I just assume not have kids and put them through all that.
this exactly dude... I dont even think dating isnt even that bad these days - its just the overall fear/insecurity and informational overdose we are living in.
It's call depression. Get into counselling. Might help.
Honestly, the bit about being confident in yourself and not needing to be in a relationship to feel "complete" is very important.
Not everyone would agree with me, but, in Christianity, marriage is the idea of "two become one". In a way, if you feel that you are an incomplete, self-loathing person, you aren't going to "complete" yourself by finding another incomplete person: you're just going to see that each of you are horribly broken. Not to say one can't make that relationship work, but it's ultimately humbly accepting how one is that comes first.
Last wedding I went to was Eastern Orthodox ☦️ and the approach was less about making vows and more about requesting God's blessings on the union
Biggest aye with this comment.
This is what I keep telling my friend. He's in his mid 20s and never been in an official relationship before and he just keeps talking about wanting to be in a relationship all the time and how it would make him so happy to which I said it won't work then. Unless you are content and happy with yourself as a person you will never be in a successful relationship.
@@Jordo246 Honestly man, I don't even think the biggest problem is you feeling bad about yourself. I manage to feel happy alone, the real problem is the fear of not finding anyone decent by 30
There complicates...
@@Akito_Yamada870 that's my point though, a lot of people get into relationships not because they want to be in a relationship but because they don't want to be alone which is not a good thing to have as the foundation of your relationship.
I've seen a lot of people who literally cannot be single for more than a couple weeks, sometimes even less. I've known people that always make sure they have a new relationship waiting for them as soon as they end their current one. Hell, it's happened to me in the past.
Most people are not okay with being alone, I used to be afraid to be alone until after my previous relationship I took a 2 year break from relationships and became okay with just being on my own. Now I live with my fiancé and things couldn't be better.
Maybe it's different for everyone but personally for me relationships just never worked properly until after that.
I got nowhere in high school with girls as a total skinny nerd, but in college, I sprouted up to around 6'4" and women flash-mobbed me. I didn't even understand it back then, as I was still a skinny nerd with no game. But it didn't matter. Women really do go for taller guys. Short guys can make it, but they have to work harder.
Short guys don't make it you are the proof. You didn't make it, until you got lucky.
I lived by college campus and had girls leave notes on my door.. i didnt even go to school there, jusy stayed in the apartments
6’5 and I’m khhv lol maybe I’m just really ugly
Its so over
Lucky you, I'm 6'2 and I was ripped in College and yet I still pulled a total of zero. In fact, that was the start of my black pill rabbithole.
Divorce is going down because the number of people getting married has also been going down, gotta watch out with those weasely statistics.
I don't think you understand statics
Rates are based on ratios, the words even have the same prefix. So 50% of 100 is the same rate/ratio as 50% of 100000. Looking at divorce rates is of total marriages, not of total people. You can't measure divorce rates of people who don't marry. So of course the rate is on people who get married and it's a ratio.
It's a root, not a prefix.
There are also a lot of people who are happier in their lives in their marriage genius.
@@footballisport I never said that it's impossible to be happy in a marriage 😅
never had a girlfriend in my life, sure, at 22 i tried getting girlfriends before, only to be toyed for years and never gotten past the friendzone, now i'm 27 and i just don't care, i realized i don't need to get a partner if i am good by myself, the only con i have is that i may regret not being a father. But meeting a girl and all is just not worth the headache nowadays...
Unless you're asexual, you're coping with being a sub5 subhuman.
In fact, the more you look at relationships these days, the more you prefer to be alone anyway.
Adopt once you are financial stable enough to raise a kid and be able to take the time off when needed? that's what I plan on doing at least
@pedroprass106 had a similar problem at 23
You can always adopt if you want to be a father
The pandemic definitely poured gasoline into the flame. The pandemic started halfway through freshman year (for me) and we’re just coming back and it’s senior year. People are over all a lot less social and very few people are in a friend group, let alone a relationship.
As someone who was homeschooled through highschool, and then had the pandemic through most of college, that makes me feel alot better about only having one small friend group.
@@EXTREME_FLUFF Yeah I used to have a lot of friends in middle school when COVID happened I had enough I decided to go full time online school but I still have my family so I am happy.
Not even. Just the internet and how the youth having access to a bunch of information that they can't handle because they 1. their brains aren't developed and 2. haven't even experienced adulthood out of school. Takes a strong will for the real world to emotional drain yeah or feed yeah some bullshit.
People took "social distancing" too literally. But that's why they called it social and not physical,that was the agenda,to make people even more distant than they were.
Derp.
Im not even getting rejected, i just get ignored lol
getting rejected is at least a sign to give up. when just getting ignored it causes the mind to race.
The sad reality is a lot of people never learn how to have difficult conversations. You read all the books or articles you want, you will never know how to have those conversations unless you have them. Take it as a sign that those women are cowards and lack significant maturity. Their lost not yours. You don't want to be with someone who can't even politely reject you.
I love incels, they fascinate me. Im not laying the pipe to 100s of women are anything im in a relationship, but jesus that mindset just cracks me up.
@Mew2Winlifestyle
Social media has definitely ruined relationships and how they work. I’m glad that I have had relationships and honestly you just have to put yourself out there
I couldn't agree more.
I am glad I grew up in a time before Facebook. I think I am shy as hell but compared to the newer generation, I am social butterfly. Also I just don't care about rejection, don't like it, can accept, but sometimes just don't want to deal with it also. So allot of times I just don't care to bother.
But allot of people have become very self centered. It is hard on both sides.
But if you really put yourself out there, know who you are, know what you want out of a relationship, are decent person, you can find someone. (no money, live with ex, I still can get a date). Do forget the most important elements that people need. Attitude and personality.