Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 (Zero Punctuation)
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
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They named him North and then every aspect of his character went south.
yeah because otherwise he'd be Jason Tinyweiner from that forgettable third occurrence of open world shoot them up clones EA'(ubisoft? dont really care, same trash to me)s been pumping for the past decade. i went to the point where i asked myself if it was the same (garbage) voice actor behind... but no.
glad i dint pay for this underachieving (again) piece of shit.
i can shoot farther in fucking stalker call of pripyat because the AI DOES spawns. at 400+. reliablely.
from anywhere. in a game that was entirely playable (and pretty much meant to be) with an AK74's ironsights from start to finish below 200.
there's countless spots on the map where you can literally see the ai pop in and out at 270-300.
some others where 540+ meter head shots and mortars firing back when i stood too long.
that shit happens on every single map.
car? boring arcadey bullshit. thanks god it's there though, the wasteland between each shooting gallery is on par with madmax.
map? 3 smallish turds. less than 8x8km each. loads forever, and wiped out bases respawn.
gimmicks. fuckin gimmicks and hold your hand, glow in the dark collectibles.
let's not talk weapon design accuracy too. the only thing right is bullet drop and the games optimisation on amd.
played it on someone else's steam account, glad to.
/rant.
Not Carlos Spicy-Wiener?
brainflash1
It really rustles my jimmies that he has the same surname as Nolan North. Anyone familiar with ZP will know what I mean when I say that.
Blazorbust my precise reaction, minus a blunt sexual solicitation or two
badum tish
Holy fuck, I thought the "believer in America's role as world pólice" was just hyperbole. But no, this game is THAT thick.
"So our protagonist watched that 'TEAM AMERICA' film and didn't realize that it was satire?"
Considering that this game was developed by Poles, I doubt that it's supposed to be taken unironically.
@@DrakeDarkHunter I dont know, Poland was one of the countries that formed Bush's "Coalition of The Willing". So they might
seems like people really want America to be the worlds police right about now 😂. Goodbye Ukraine and Taiwan and probably a few other counties.
@@keith3761 nah, American intervention would make those both those situations 10 times worse
How to improve this game: Sniper Ghost Wario
Powoga Waluigi could use his own game tho ... Maybe he will be the masked sniper?
Sniper: Ghost WAAAAAAAA
DOH i missed
Powoga Tank pilot Waluigi is the sequel.
Send this to Cool Games Inc!
"scout ahead
mark them up
Stealth it up
fuck it up
shoot em up"
absolute gold!!! 😂😂😂❤
My favorite part is, when I was setting up the game to be sold at my store, I read the back, and all the info I could get from it was that it will get better, with DLC.
The last line in this video is one of my favorite one-liners that Yahtzee has ever muttered.
+"go and Ghost Warrior the bollocks off some fools"
Call of Sniper Elite Ghost Warfighter Recon: Hardline Warfare
You forgot Modern or Tactical
we're past that now, we're stuck with "advanced" or "future" i.e. LASER GUNS AND FLYING
Why not both?
+Write a name here Didn't want to be too demanding, besides if we wanted to list all the generic shooter words, i'd have to get my thesaurus :D
Go big or go home
Just saying I would play a game where whoopi Goldberg is the supervillan
Beast Ninja Would you believe that was the first choice for Advanced Warfare, but her phone went to voicemail so they had to cast Kevin Spacey?
Beast Ninja I don't mind paying all the DLC just to see Whoopi Goldberg as the villian
If you play the Lion King you kinda have the same feeling
I propose a Kickstarter, post-haste.
I'll buy microtransactions on a 60$ game just to see that
500 weeks of Zero Punc. Jeez that's one hell of a portfolio, Yahtz.
That is in addition to the games and the books. Yahtzee basically has a good enough resume to get hired. Yes, you read that correct, specifying where is not needed.
Also the few episodes not available on youtube.
Sad to say, I remember watching the very first episodes, back when each one had different opening/closing music. I wonder if anyone would actually remember some of those games (e.g. Heavenly Sword) if it wasn't for Yahtzee,
Keith Fraser I remember Nier and the copyrighted music at the beginning of the episodes. That may be selective memory but I couldn't be asked to check.
Aniruddha Shanbhag I remember his review of the darkness demo so I win
Yahtzee, if you don’t mind, I’m gonna steal that “I’d rather” metaphor at the end because that’s a good one.
Modern military games really seem to like using the word Ghost in their titles, don't they? I get a big laugh out of imagining all these macho, battle-hardened supersoldiers somewhere in the Haunted Mansion, popping out from behind tombstones or something.
I think it's probably to add an air of glamour to the kind of stealth and sneakiness required for a lot of modern war-fighting (*snigger*). Soldier Who Hides In Bushes Wearing A Suit Made of Twigs And Kills People Who Don't Know He's There sounds a lot less cool and badass than "GUN NINJA OF THE EBON NIGHT".
Cody Hines I've heard of that game; a friend of mine is a fan of everything Capcom related, and he mentioned it was by the creators of Ace Attorney.
Plut0nio Correct you are!
"GUN NINJA OF THE EBON NIGHT"
I'd buy that.
Cody Hines i love that game
Yahtzee invents a far more interesting game in the first eight seconds of the review.
You might think that but he did just describe half the plot of beyond two souls. So maybe not.
Or Shadow of Mordor
Cough it’s called gorn
Sniper Ghost Warrior 3
Ghost Recon: Wildlands
Call of Duty Ghosts
Ghost In The Shell: Stand Alone
StarCraft: Ghost
Ghostbusters the Video Game
Given the description of the protagonist, are we sure we're not playing as the villain in this game?
If this is 500 episodes and it's once a week. Zero punctuation started 10 years ago.
Jacob Wilson well seeing as one of his first reviews was the darkness 1 and the heavenly sword demo
jesus
Jacob Wilson 499*
Aye, sounds about right.
52 x 10 = 500?
I tell you what though, i'd play the hell a game where you have to counter-snipe Cardinal Richelieu.
Perhaps he's on a quest to eliminate all the butcher dukes of King Louis XIII's courts to reaffirm the power of the French crown while you are employed by Marie di Medici to stop him. Or something. Call it The Red Eminence and you have my money.
I think that's just a properly done Assassin's Creed game there
"Let's call him Oliver"...high brow indeed Yahtzee, wonder how many people will get the reference.
Arron Tolan I've seen American dad so i do 😄
"domestic violence eyes" are you trying to kill me?
That's one of the best yahtzeeisms ever, I legit lost it at that line.
Have a like, just for the fact i never expected to ever hear the phrase "Bollock Burrito"
God I burst out laugh at the surprise Cardinal Richelieu out of the blue. Love you Yahtzee.
2:25 Only slightly less obvious then Jason Todd being the Arkham Knight.
ok, I knew I shouldn't have used internet.
Is it really spoilers if it was obvious?
When they start hinting that Jason Todd was killed by the Joker, it ruin it all for me.
The difference is anyone who actually reads the comics knows Jason Todd is the Arkham Knight. Not me though, but a friend of mine who's really into Batman guessed it when playing it completely blind.
It was my immediate guess when the marketing was teasing 'who could this more violent replacement Batman be?!???' xD
Aight, who`s up for some bollock burritos?
I'd like a testicle taco, please.
Petr Pavlensky!
Spec Tolder I want nerve nachos!
Trolololo Lolololo , only penis pepperonies left, sorry.
Spec Tolder Darn.
4:00 Amazing, Yahtzee managed to review Sniper Ghost Warrior 3 AND Spectre in the same video. His talents are endless.
It's a shame because one more pass at the script would have fixed Specter. Make Agent C the big bad guy (because he's the Spectre agent with the plan to take over the world) and make James Bond's stepbrother the big strong right hand man guy (because all he wants to do is fight Bond). Make James Bond too numb about his parental issues to care (he's watched his parents die twice, and he's still the richest most woman-banging agent in MI6; that's not exactly well-adjusted but it's a hell of a lot closer to the Bond of old) so that he's the polar opposite of his insane passionate stepbrother. Rewrite the Blofeld name reveal so so it's not so cringy (the underlying idea of hating his dad so much that he uses his mom's maiden name is decent, but the execution is eye-rolling). Trim a little padding out of the action scenes
At the end of Spectre I was left feeling like it was no longer Bond taking on the world as he has done (very well, I might add) for the last 50 something years but more James Bond and his Scooby Doo gang of pals.... But I'm no Daniel 'Miserable Bastard' Craig fan to start with anyway so I'm a little bias.
I joined in the James Bond gravy train incredibly late. Case in point, I haven't actually seen any of the Connery movies yet (for some reason it's much easier to get Roger Moore DVDs). Every actor is "just another Bond" to me, Dan Craig included.
And you're absolutely right. Bond spends the entire climax of Spectre chasing what amounts to one henchman around while his "Scooby gang" of co-workers fight the actual villain, the actual schemer who is taking over the planet. It's the fate of the world at stake, and the movie treats it like a sub-plot. Bond should be in there!
Oh yahtz, you're the silver lining to even the worst games created because I know that the worse a game is, the more colorful and creative your review will be. Here's to 500 zero punctuations, and the 2000+ swear words you've taught me. May there always be a new game for you to shit on.
I'm pretty sure the bottom 100-500 games of all time are already occupied by the 1980's, and I've seen at least three and I know Yahtzee couldn't squeeze a 7-minute ZP out of all three combined. However, yeah, he's pretty damn good at shitting all over games with some form of story and gameplay.
That name sounds like a generic Steven Seagal movie.
bollock burrito.
Bollock Burrito.
I just lost it.
Oh damn that ending line was quite an image
The masked sniper was Jason Todd, right?
Raises fist and goes "This Go In You."
2:40 when he held the level against the 'ground' it perfectly rested on the playback bar.
So very funny with all the funny bits and the imps! XD Oh, and the Team America World Police reference.
One of the best episodes in a long time. I almost laughed my b*llocks off!
"Both of the Compass Roses are pointing North".....brilliant.
500th video of zero punctuation
Argus actually one of the episodes is actually "On The Escapist" so it's 499 :(
Nobody gives a flying fuck.
Kingler The Great check the playlist again
Argus I did, unless you count On The Escapist to be an episode, which I very much doubt
Kingler The Great oh now I understand what u r talking about
You know Yahtzee? Watching you while eating will be the death of me of someday because almost every time I do, you make me laugh so hard food/drink goes down the wrong pipe and I end up coughing and laughing for the next five minutes. Screw you for being hilarious and awesome!
"...but if James Bond had all his charisma sucked out and replaced with unsolved paternal issues."
So like the most recent James Bond films then?
DynoStretch No. Daniel Craig has charm and could smile every now and then.
3:00 Sad part is, there are a LOT of people on this side of the pond who really do believe that...completely unironically. And who would say that even without having seen the movie...
Couldn't stop laughing at the time management bit xD
3:25 didint know sean spicer was in this game
That bit at the end about the burrito is why I'm so glad you using images to describe the things you say rather than making me imagine far worse images.
This was a brilliant episode, Yahtzee had a field day ripping this game to shreds.
Rest in peace, Boris, Boris, Boris, Maurice and Ivan. You will not be missed.
It took me awhile to realize this wasn't part of the Sniper Elite series
I wonder which is worse a serial bed wetter or a bed wetter who goes infrequently but you know its going to happen? These are the question people should be asking
I remember watching this on the livestream
Wasn't sure if I was gonna get this or not, but the way you described the story makes me think I'm gonna end up getting it
I just realised something after watching ZP's old videos. He has finally broken his addiction of fucking dolphins, burning optional
3:13
"With kings and counsellers of the earth, which built desolate places for themselves;"
I think yahtzee is having a jab at the games industry
Bit late but it's also the Bible verse in mission impossible 1
This is one of the most passionately angry reviews he has done in awhile. I like it!
"I'd rather hammer my scrotom into a 6-foot pancake, and roll myself into a bollock burrito."
Fucking priceless.
Sniper: Ghost Warrior. The series that shouldnt have been, but is.
This is an actual game? Wow, I read the title and thought he was making a joke like "Call of Battlefield" or "Gears of Halo" or something.
No see, if it was Gears of Halo, it would be rated JO. Jesus only.
In case anyone is wondering, Job 3:14 is: “with kings and rulers of the earth, who built for themselves places now lying in ruins,”
Job 3:14 NIV
"Magnetic North"
I laughed way too hard at that.
I am currently studying for my Radar Systems exam and thought I could relax a bit with a nice episode of ZP.
Anyways, the formula at 4:54 is the scalar radar equation and there is apparently no escape
Bullock burrito! Bahahahahahahahahahahahaha.... I just came back from the future and I'm still laughing at that one in 2024
How has this guy still got less than 1 mill subs. Don't think there has been a video I haven't loved and laughed way too hard at. Love this channel. ❤️😂
That last analogy was pretty funny, kudos Mr Crow
Hello from the future worst game for Yahtzee of 2017!
For what its worth, i enjoyed the look of the Caucasus mountains.
Just got this game on steam summer sale 2021. I forgot this video existed and the entire time I've been playing it I heard faint whispers of this commentary on loop in the back of my head. I looked up if this game was indented to be satire because Ci games was unapologetically European with their numbers in this game (unlike any American soldier would be) and rediscovered this video. Honestly, once I thought about it, the game became so bad it looped around and now I cant put it down. So many bugs and shitty plot points to explore. Brings me back to the days of GTA san andreas.
When I show Zero Punctuation to new people, I show them this video. It's like a perfect example of the series.
knocked it out the park with that one sir. To funny.
The best part of these on youtube is that they lowered the outro volume.
3:46
...Soo anyone else suddenly interested in this game?
THe timing on the Oliver north joke was just fucking superb.
The art was top tier on this one.
He always gets me laughing hard as Dwayne Johnson on the last sentences in every Zero Punctuation video.
"PLONG" is my new favourite onomatopoiea.
Needed more of Ivan, Boris and Morris.
10 YEARS and counting. Damn!
"and roll myself into a bollock burrito" xD
parody that isn't a parody is more of a gaming genre than action adventure
'Bollocks Burrito' that made my day
Literally...LMAO.... the wife thought I was having a fit :P
storytelling instincts, you big..........
laughed @ that ZP. Bravo
5:10
Wrap it up, this is the height of poetry.
This was some of the most of hilarious work of yours
I’m not going to lie, he makes this game sound immensely entertaining.
Some Admirable Bastion of Humanity
This particular video had me rolling on the floor laughing, keep them coming!
The Bollock-Burito Just had ne spitting my Coffee over my Table, thanks yathzee
Job 3:14 With kings and counsellets of the earth, which built desolate places for themselves.
They should combine a sniping game with the Shadow of Mordor/War Nemesis system.
Imagine how cool it would be if you shot some terrorist general but he survived and came back with a metal plate in his face. That would actually lend some meaning to all this silly head exploding nonsense.
Well, now I know what I’m calling my band. Bolick Burrito.
For anyone wondering, Job 3:14 (with 13 for context): "For now I would have lain still and been quiet, I would have been asleep; then I would have been at rest with kings and counsellers of the earth/ which [re]built desolate places for themselves."
I agree, the loading times are absolutely ridiculous. I pressed start then fucked off for ten minutes for a smoke and a coffee. Got drawn into a conversation with a neighbour then remembered I had to go to the shop. Came back and boom! 80% loaded
Yahtzee's seriously about the only RUclipsr I know that when I watch I actually laugh out loud in spite of there not being anyone else in the room. That's saying something.
The only thing better then Yahtzee doing these is on the rare chance i get to see him and total biscuit together on their podcast over at Cynical Brit.
Magnetic North 😂
Why does every Zero Punctuation video--and ONLY the Zero Punctuation videos--freeze and buffer after a few seconds of the intro?
Evi1M4chine it really only happens with these videos. I can count on it happening, to the point where I naturally hear the freezing pause of the intro song in my head when the video gets between the 0:02 and 0:04 mark. It's actually kind of funny, but I still wish it didn't happen.
I choose to believe Mystery Evil Sniper is the Spanish Inquisition.
This is what "Homefront Revolution" was last year. A game that was a generation too late.
Finally, more zero punctuation.
One of ZP's funniest reviews in a long while.
The man has a way with words. XD
haha that end
Happy 500th, Zero Punctuation
Oh you have outdone yourself with this one yahtzee
Also the headshots death is the same every time they just fall do the side the same way