So...To clarify...The sister went through a bad divorce and was super depressed that her relationship and marriage had failed. The solution they came up with, was to send her on a trip as a third wheel with two freshly married people on their honeymoon...So she can awkwardly watch them be super in love and rub it in her face? I don't follow the logic here...I mean...Maybe...Nope. Don't get it.
Keep in mind, she was barred from the wedding party itself because it would just remind her of her failed marriage or whatever. The logic isn't logicking
Not only that, she will most likely spend the rest of her life feeling responsible for ruining her brother's marriage as well as hers (even tho she's not in the wrong). ~A little more of guilt, that'll make her feel better after her divorce~ the husband and mom probably
@@f687sNFM You might have a point. It could also be that he genuinely doesn't understand the point/intimacy of a honeymoon & can't be bothered to see outside his own worldview to notice the viewpoints of others
If Nora wanted to cheer up Angie so bad, why didn’t she take her on a trip? Or have everyone go on a family trip after the honeymoon? That would’ve been way better!
Because it's not really about making Angie feel better. It's about being right and showing OP where she stands in the family. That's why even when Angie tells them they fucked up they ignore it. It was never about Angie. It's about OP being a second class citizen in her own marriage
But then Nora would have had to pony up for the trip herself! No, of course it makes so much more sense to take over her son's honeymoon; the trip is already paid for, and she gets to show her new DiL her proper place (bowing to the family's/her whims). *s/*
Yo TF is wrong with OP's husband. Did mofo really sit there and tell her a honeymoon is a glorified vacation and thought nothing would happen if her sister tagged along on their HONEYMOON?!?!?!!?
Crazy. What’s a honeymoon? A lot of lovey-dovey activities and nights of ***. I can only guess that, because OP’s trip involved a lot of sightseeing and hiking, slightly different from the traditional honeymoon, hubby thought it wasn’t as emotionally charged and figured it was just an adventure trip, thus sister in law wouldn’t be third wheel. Still, hubby and mommy are 100% in the wrong.
Completely ignoring the fact that the same logic for not asking Angie to be in the wedding party can be applied to the honeymoon, Jacob also lied to Angie, and hurt her even more.
She's going to spend the rest of her life, no matter how they try to soothe her, remembering the time her own marriage fell through and how she "destroyed her brothers too" The MIL and Husband are freaks
i was thinking this as well- why would she want to be third wheeling on their 3 week trip if the wedding itself was too much for her.... its a honeymoon theyre going to be celebrating their love... seems like it wouldnt be ideal for someone who was recently divorced or heartbroken
Angie inadvertently exposed a HUGE problem. Jacob is stubborn and inconsiderate. It’s best that the wife found out early and the divorce is settled before it gets too complicated
THISSSSSSS!!! And then he’s so stubborn he’d rather divorce OP than admit he’s wrong despite his own sister telling him he’s in the wrong. OP dodged a bullet
Hilariously, the most sane person here was Angie. "I'm sorry, I was told something incorrect" is logical in this case. Sadly, it means the husband is crazy and annulling the marriage is probably the best course of action
Still insane for even thinking 3rd wheeling a honeymoon was going to be fun or good for any party involved + she threw her brother under the bus instantly to look better
Even op was crazy in this, everyone was telling her this is grounds for divorce and she was like "no it's not that simple" and when she comes back the first thing he does is threaten HER with divorce and still went and wasted time with marriage counseling for a man who didn't care about her in their LITERAL honeymoon phase
Take my like. Best response. OP is crazy you don’t need a divorce. Anullement will do the trick or whatever do you call it. And she wants to get something out of the divorce? After one month? God if i divorce my wife i’m definetly not getting married again and will tell my kids not to
I’d also add Angie in that. Not very delusional, but still on the list. Cause even before Nora suggested her going, she shouldve at least had it in her damn mind that going with a newlywed couple on their honeymoon is wrong and pretty rude, too.
@@poohbear4515 She did. He insisted and Mommy was right there with him. He had to lie to get Angie to agree to go. Angie was also the first to apologize, because she realized she was lied to. Angie's also the one telling her brother and her mother that it was wrong for them to do that, but they're not even listening to the person they claimed to want to help.
@@NeilTruick Must’ve misheard the outcome. I dunno, even if you’re lied to without knowing it, you would still at least know its not right to go on a honeymoon as a 3rd wheel. But at least Angie was the only one with a brain except her brother and mother.
Bruh, who tf would WANT to go as a third wheel on someone's HONEYMOON. Its just disturbing behavior. Seriously, do people like this actually exist? If yes, this world is back asswards. 🤢
behavior like this is extremely common from where i come from, india. My mom still mentions how her mil and sil accompanied her on my parents honeymoon AND my dad spending most of his time with his mom...
@@jasminej8048 Oh my! I had no idea and meant no offense. In the American culture, most honeymoons are celebrated for the couple to sanctify and deeper the new bond, 1:1. It would be offensive to expect to join along or to ask family to tag along. Thank you for teaching us. Cultural differences are astounding.
@@jasminej8048 bruh im from india and noone i know has done shit like this😂, people would think your family is incestous if yall go for honeymoon with sisters 😂😂
Not secretly but I found it weird when my sister went on honeymoon she and my BL invited our parents and me to go to their destination. We had a blast but hell no am I doing the same
@@Jujudajojo the hard part of cheating on a spouse ain’t the sex, and it ain’t finding a person to do it with. The hard part is looking the person you swore to love in the face and lying to them every day. If someone has proven they can look you in the face and lie, there’s nothing they couldn’t do.
So Jacob tells Angie that bringing her along was totally OP's idea, but she can't ask OP about it because it's a surprise? I think I would have realised there that something is up.
It can happen if Jacob said OP expressed how Angie accompanying them would be great and help her with the depression but didn't want to ask her to accompany them, and he wanted to surprise her
Well, phrasing matters Example J: "Hey Angie, Op is talking about taking you with us but hasn't decided yet. So how about it?" A: "But this is y'alls honeymoon. Does she really want me there. I'll call and ask, " J: "Actually, i wanted to surprise her with it, so could you please not call her. I know she'll just love you tagging along. "
look honey just divorce him. You win. For the rest of your life, when someone asks why, all you have to say is, "He tried to bring his sister on our honeymoon." You are triumphant forever. Just move on.
@@mill2712 Even better, then she can say she was never married. Because she wasn't. She was temporarily best friends with an incurable momma's boy who never had any intention of being a husband.
@@eowyneadig7879Angie didn't ask to go on the honeymoon. She was told that op was okay with it. Angie didn't do anything wrong. She even agreed with op and told her brother and mother what they did was wrong but they won't listen.
This guy understood everything he did. He's controlling, manipulative, and entitled. The only reason he went to therapy was so that therapy could straighten out HER thinking, and when that didn't happen, he was angry. These are all signs of abusive behavior (not the wanting to take the sister on their trip, but way it was done). A great book to read that explains this type of behavior in detail is "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft.
he used her and then tried to gaslight her, even his sister thinks he did wrong, literally doing a few things raised so many red flags, it's crazy, that he prefers to fight for his ego than for his wife. There's no way she hasn't seen red before
He was manipulating the situation and he would have continued throughout the marriage. I'd have sacked him aswell. He actually did this to both you and his sister! I'm sure she was mortified!
@@noshitsherlock5 and? He’s being an asshole and is refusing to see OPs side, refusing to take accountability, refusing to apologize and accept he’s wrong. He didn’t give a fck about her feelings but she’s supposed to be a good wife to him?
@@Jujudajojo well blocking her husband while she's on her trip certainly didn't click to me. She can put his chats archived or ignore him but what if something emergency happens? She's gonna call her husband. Possibly her parents pick up too but what if they are out of reach. She did the right thing talking about it in a mature way after coming home. And they were in a relationship for 7 years. It's not that simple it seems like.
Can someone please explain to me why it's the newlyweds responsibility to ensure that the groom's sister's happiness. Any idea of Third Wheeling somebody's honeymoon is disgusting to me.
So he did all of that to cheer his sister up to take her on the trip and didn’t even go with her after OP bailed on them… what was the real reason?!?! Chile, glad she left
The husband is already a liar and a weirdo for even suggesting that. The mother is intrusive and should know her place, if she wants her daughter to feel better there are thousands of ways, most of them better than this sh*t. And Angie is so weird, you have 26 years old and you think it's fun to third wheel your brother on his honeymoon? And then she throws him under the bus instantly! What a family
He's (the husband) just cutting off his nose to spite his face. He knows he's wrong because no one agrees with him but still not willing to grovel(which he should)
As she said in the post, he's more concerned about being right than doing right. His ego is more important to him than his marriage or even the person who he's supposedly trying to help
@@mr.halfrightI wonder how much it's actually him and how much it's just mommy calling the tune. Want to see how he behaves when mommy dearest suddenly admits she was in the wrong (not that it will ever happen)
The worst thing the husband did was the doubling down and tearing OP down that makes this impossible to get over/forgive. This guy is should marry his mom she the only woman he listens to.
I have FIVE SIBLINGS! I would never want to go on any of their honeymoons and I wouldn't want them to join me on mine. WTAF is going on in his and his mother's head?
Jacob and Nora are the arsehole. Funny how Angie was the reasonable one (I know it wasn't her idea)! Like I would be an entitled arsehole to asked my bro to come to his honeymoon when he got married. No I didn't get a divorse and became super depressed but even I know wedding and honeymoon are suppose to be "personal" than a regular holiday! Even then why couldn't Nora just send Angie to some holiday or event like a spa day when she said she would paid for her expenses? Also how the heck the couple council went? Did Jacob didn't take the L? Hope Angie doesn't feel guilty if she think she was the reason they broke up?
From the way it sounds, it seems like Jacob and OP would come to some type of agreement in therapy and then afterwards he probably backtracked or took back whatever agreement(s) he made. The guy comes off as a Gaslighter, so I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.
Now Angie has more guilt to unpack probably thinking this was her fault :/ poor woman. Im glad OP was able to get out but their ex and his mother are too stubborn for their own good
No. Usually MIL like Nora will interfere alot in such marriages . Not making life easy for you. Marriage is not only for about 2 people. It's about 2 families.
Dude, like what kind of mentality do you have to not understand the situation in hand?! The husband, stubborn as he is, doesn't see that he's the turmoil of the problem! The fact that these kinds of people exist, it's so painful to try to reason with them. But I'm glad that the sister in law is sane to see the situation, I just hope she goes away from that crazy family and finds someone that can truly love her.
15:27 as someone with a sibling, I would be downright DISGUSTED to have them travel with me for a honeymoon. That's supposed to be private, intimate time to celebrate + strengthen your bond with your spouse without having to consider anyone else for once. It is meant to be a getaway, exclusive for the two of you, so anyone else sharing that (particularly family) smells like a violation.
It's a honeymoon, and if he is willing to lie, conspire, and betray you in any way. Then he isn't ready to be in a relationship. This will become a pattern of behavior. OP doesn't even see how disrespectful he continues to be. A divorce was the right decision. When you're in a marriage communication is one of the pillars. An he didn't have a good foundation to begin with which is why that pillar crumbled.
There is absolutely NO WAY this is the first thing he's done to disrespect his relationship with OP. Im willing to bet that he has put his mom's wants over his partner's needs plenty of times but it was just on a smaller scale that she just let it go.
So he said the sister shouldn't be involved in the wedding prep would raise unpleasant feelings for her (valid) but following them around on a romantic honeymoon is A-ok?
Let’s ignore the POS now stbx husband. Let’s take a sec to think about how Ms. Nora responded to her daughter’s pain. Instead of being there and providing comfort to her daughter who had her whole world shattered by her cheating ex, mommy dearest’s grand idea was to make said devastated daughter become a 3rd wheel on her brother’s & SIL’s honeymoon. So Angie is just meant to try & “enjoy herself” whilst being reminded of what she lost for an entire WEEK? Sounds to me like mommy didn’t want to deal with Angie crying and moping around her house and would rather push her off on others, while patting herself on the back. Even worse is Jacob was stupid enough to go along with it, when he was the one to originally tell oop, not to involve angie in the wedding prep because it might send her into another depressive episode, yet saw nothing wrong with her joining them on their honeymoon? 🙄
Feels like a lot of the focus is about whether OP was right or wrong in not wanting sil there. For me that doesn't matter, major red flag is he went behind her back and lied to get what he thought was best. If he didn't discuss their difference if opinion beforehand and didn't see what was wrong with that then he would never treat her with respect and she could never trust him
HUGE red flag him going along with Mommy. As the youngest of 14 ( yes, some were already married with children), so I was babied by many. In NO WAY was I permitted to even spend a NIGHT at my sister's homes until they had been married for a while. Even if I was invited. My Mom said they just got married and need time alone.
As a man with several sisters whom I love dearly, this dude way fkn overstepped and was completely out of line. For him not to be able to see that his wife just needed this one occasion to be for them and then alone and not to be able to be there just that one time is unforgivable. He was tragically stupid and divorcing her was merciful.
I can't xDDD he didn't want his sister to be involved in the wedding's préparation because it could "make her sad", but it's okay to take her on the honeymoon ?? The most intimate part of it ?? XD
Let's give thanks to Nora for even demanding OP bring Angie to her honeymoon which resulted in a destroyed marriage. Ex is no better either. Good riddance.
Only a month into marriage and he already disrespects her boundaries and trumps over his wife over something that should always have been a shared decision. At some point, her ‘no’ will be disregarded as well and he will also gaslight her after the assault.
The dude showed OP who he really was right there. Manipulative, gaslighty, doesn't see her as an equal in the marriage. Just all-round sucky. Feel sorry for Angie, though, being caught in the middle of all that. Just think how she feels for being the reason (not the cause, that was the husband) that aother marriage fell apart. That's gotta be hell on her mental well-being.
He felt bad for his sister being divorced, so he got it himself too so she won’t feel being the only divorced one in the family. Such a great guy. Salute to him. Such a caring brother.
Why would Angie even want to third wheel on HONEYMOON when what she’s depressed about if her marriage falling apart. Also how do you surprise someone who also invited you?
If I was Angie, being brought on someone’s honeymoon out of sympathy would feel worse then what I would be feeling right then and there. No one wants to be given a pity vacation on someone else’s honeymoon. That’s not right or fair on Angie whatsoever. She’s going through a tough patch but you can’t just pity her. Op needs to leave her husband. Even Angie said what he did was wrong and this was apparently all for her
When Angie tried telling her mother and brother that she did not blame OP for being upset because she knew she would be too if she was in OPs shoes! She tried telling them that what they did was messed up and underhanded and they still refuse to listen is very telling of what kind of people they are! I hope Angie goes NC with them; maybe then they might realize how badly they screwed up!
So…the husband and mother in law not only went behind BOTH Op’s and Angie’s backs…ultimately setting her up for embarrassment and disappointment and then refuse to admit they were wrong…even after being told that by the very person they were trying to help/protect. Anyone else find that twisted?
Oh yeah we would all love to be the third wheel on someone's honeymoon? It would be a different thing if the parents also went along so they could entertain and go on trips with Angie, so the newlyweds could enjoy their time together without a third wheel to kill the mood
If I had a nickel for every time someone got invited to a honeymoon vacation, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice
@@lyraflow9154 I don’t remember the details as it was a while ago, I just remember that a partner invited a family member along to their honeymoon. They ended up getting divorced as well eventually
The husband is a total nutcase. Refusing accountability and clinging to your ego and twisted principles will be the reason why karma will haunt you down. The mere fact that you married your wife means that she and your future children will be your topmost priority. Your immediate family comes second. Because you are now starting to create your lives as husband and wife in helping one another. And building your relationship with trust, respect, love and commitment. As for the wife, kuddos on your decision. I hope that you will get your another chance of a happy life soon.
Soooo um... did nobody think for more than 5 seconds about what the neighbors were gonna say? Nora: Oh, my son is just too sweet! He invited his sister on his honeymoon! 🥰 Neighbors: *monkey giving bombastic sideye meme*
I wonder how Angie feels now 🤔 I think she'll be more depress and blame herself for it. Well done for the brother and mother for making her feel worse instead of actually helping her 🙄🤦
So to help the sister who was hurt over her ruined marriage he ruined his own marriage? Smart move... 🙄 That's also super weird to invite someone else, anyone else on a honeymoon. It's kinda gross. It's also gross they just decided to bully OP into going around with this. OP should leave, immediately. He clearly doesn't respect her and went behind her back with his mom to manipulate her. His heart wasn't in the right place, if it was he would have found a better way to help his sister without the lies and manipulation. He'll do this again and completely disregard her feelings.
Some things should be exclusive to a couple. Things like honeymoons. Does he want his sister in the wedding bed too? Making mistakes is forgivable. Justifying mistakes is not.
Honestly if her husband is doing sneaky stuff like this within weeks of the marriage. I believe he was already sneaking around before. At least Angie is on her side and is actively sticking up for her. She may lose a husband, but Angie can still be her friend.
Who in the hell wants to go with somebody on their honeymoon? That is odd and uncomfortable. They’re gonna want to do romantic cutesy stuff. Why would she want to be a third wheel for three weeks? Was she suicidal or something? even then sent her to a mental hospital not a vacation. But clearly sister wasn’t that depressed because she even realize yeah it’s kind of weird to go on your honeymoon with you. But if they wanted to cheer her up, they could’ve easily done a mommy and daughter weekend to the spa themselves why did she have to go so badly. And I have four siblings. I don’t want to go on nobodies honeymoon with them and they damn sure not coming. on mine.
Your mental health comes first.. I'm proud of you..I beleave u made all the right steps and then some.. so try to continue your life and be happy cause u deserve it😊
Nora and Jacob give off such narcissistic vibes, there were probably prior signs, but OP was in that cloud that narcissists create. The way Jacob kept Angie out of the wedding was a sign too, they keep making sweeping decisions for adults and refuse to see how they're wrong. Even if it's obvious. Hope OP has a good lawyer, cause narcissists never divorce nicely.
You can't just break up and ghost him, but annulment as though the marriage never happened is on the table considering he invited his sister on the honeymoon. That would raise some judges and lawyers eyebrows about the legitimacy of the marriage and his intentions. May not even need to go through division of assets or full blown divorce. Either way, mention "incest" one time during the proceedings. It'll make things go faster.
His mask came off as soon as the wedding was over. He didn't care about his wife's opinions or emotions, didn't care about lying to and about her and it would have just gotten worse and worse over time.
So...To clarify...The sister went through a bad divorce and was super depressed that her relationship and marriage had failed. The solution they came up with, was to send her on a trip as a third wheel with two freshly married people on their honeymoon...So she can awkwardly watch them be super in love and rub it in her face? I don't follow the logic here...I mean...Maybe...Nope. Don't get it.
this exactly!!!
Keep in mind, she was barred from the wedding party itself because it would just remind her of her failed marriage or whatever. The logic isn't logicking
Not only that, she will most likely spend the rest of her life feeling responsible for ruining her brother's marriage as well as hers (even tho she's not in the wrong).
~A little more of guilt, that'll make her feel better after her divorce~ the husband and mom probably
Cuz the brother is in love with his sister
@@f687sNFM You might have a point. It could also be that he genuinely doesn't understand the point/intimacy of a honeymoon & can't be bothered to see outside his own worldview to notice the viewpoints of others
If Nora wanted to cheer up Angie so bad, why didn’t she take her on a trip? Or have everyone go on a family trip after the honeymoon? That would’ve been way better!
Because it's not really about making Angie feel better. It's about being right and showing OP where she stands in the family. That's why even when Angie tells them they fucked up they ignore it. It was never about Angie. It's about OP being a second class citizen in her own marriage
It was a power move on the part of MIL to show OP that she will always be able to pit her husband against her.
But then Nora would have had to pony up for the trip herself! No, of course it makes so much more sense to take over her son's honeymoon; the trip is already paid for, and she gets to show her new DiL her proper place (bowing to the family's/her whims).
*s/*
They weren’t smart enough to
Also, making Angie pay to go on a trip she has no say in? That’s beyond horrid
Yo TF is wrong with OP's husband. Did mofo really sit there and tell her a honeymoon is a glorified vacation and thought nothing would happen if her sister tagged along on their HONEYMOON?!?!?!!?
Mommy told him to do it, and mommy is always right
@@MinisterManDanyes mommy knows best
@6:37
My guess is Angie isn't a sister/SIL
Crazy. What’s a honeymoon? A lot of lovey-dovey activities and nights of ***. I can only guess that, because OP’s trip involved a lot of sightseeing and hiking, slightly different from the traditional honeymoon, hubby thought it wasn’t as emotionally charged and figured it was just an adventure trip, thus sister in law wouldn’t be third wheel. Still, hubby and mommy are 100% in the wrong.
Fr bruh this guy is dumb as brick rock stone pebble what ever you can find he is dumb😂😂
Completely ignoring the fact that the same logic for not asking Angie to be in the wedding party can be applied to the honeymoon, Jacob also lied to Angie, and hurt her even more.
She's going to spend the rest of her life, no matter how they try to soothe her, remembering the time her own marriage fell through and how she "destroyed her brothers too"
The MIL and Husband are freaks
i was thinking this as well- why would she want to be third wheeling on their 3 week trip if the wedding itself was too much for her.... its a honeymoon theyre going to be celebrating their love... seems like it wouldnt be ideal for someone who was recently divorced or heartbroken
@@deejones0071 I didn't even think of that, that's so horrifying on her end. It sucks that she has to have a brother & mother like that
@@imnotyourvillainmeh she sucks too. Shes a grown ass adult and should know better
@@JujudajojoNo, the brother insisted that wifey wanted her to go. Don't put this on her. It's all the husband and mothers fault.
The worst part is that he doesn't see the honeymoon as romantic. It is just a vacation to him.
And this is why she should leave him... His shallow and don't deserve to be married
Angie inadvertently exposed a HUGE problem. Jacob is stubborn and inconsiderate. It’s best that the wife found out early and the divorce is settled before it gets too complicated
THISSSSSSS!!! And then he’s so stubborn he’d rather divorce OP than admit he’s wrong despite his own sister telling him he’s in the wrong. OP dodged a bullet
It's his opinion, nothing wrong with being weird
Hilariously, the most sane person here was Angie. "I'm sorry, I was told something incorrect" is logical in this case. Sadly, it means the husband is crazy and annulling the marriage is probably the best course of action
Still insane for even thinking 3rd wheeling a honeymoon was going to be fun or good for any party involved + she threw her brother under the bus instantly to look better
Even op was crazy in this, everyone was telling her this is grounds for divorce and she was like "no it's not that simple" and when she comes back the first thing he does is threaten HER with divorce and still went and wasted time with marriage counseling for a man who didn't care about her in their LITERAL honeymoon phase
Take my like. Best response. OP is crazy you don’t need a divorce. Anullement will do the trick or whatever do you call it. And she wants to get something out of the divorce? After one month? God if i divorce my wife i’m definetly not getting married again and will tell my kids not to
@@TileBitanNo she threw him there because he lied to her and that's where he should be.
Yeah Angie thought that op knew about it
Jacob and Nora are completely delusional. You don’t bring a 3rd party to your honeymoon!
I’d also add Angie in that. Not very delusional, but still on the list. Cause even before Nora suggested her going, she shouldve at least had it in her damn mind that going with a newlywed couple on their honeymoon is wrong and pretty rude, too.
@@poohbear4515 She did. He insisted and Mommy was right there with him. He had to lie to get Angie to agree to go. Angie was also the first to apologize, because she realized she was lied to. Angie's also the one telling her brother and her mother that it was wrong for them to do that, but they're not even listening to the person they claimed to want to help.
@@NeilTruick Must’ve misheard the outcome. I dunno, even if you’re lied to without knowing it, you would still at least know its not right to go on a honeymoon as a 3rd wheel. But at least Angie was the only one with a brain except her brother and mother.
Bruh, who tf would WANT to go as a third wheel on someone's HONEYMOON. Its just disturbing behavior. Seriously, do people like this actually exist? If yes, this world is back asswards. 🤢
behavior like this is extremely common from where i come from, india. My mom still mentions how her mil and sil accompanied her on my parents honeymoon AND my dad spending most of his time with his mom...
@@jasminej8048 Oh my! I had no idea and meant no offense. In the American culture, most honeymoons are celebrated for the couple to sanctify and deeper the new bond, 1:1. It would be offensive to expect to join along or to ask family to tag along. Thank you for teaching us. Cultural differences are astounding.
@@jasminej8048 bruh im from india and noone i know has done shit like this😂, people would think your family is incestous if yall go for honeymoon with sisters 😂😂
Not secretly but I found it weird when my sister went on honeymoon she and my BL invited our parents and me to go to their destination. We had a blast but hell no am I doing the same
@@jasminej8048 That might be common just in your family tbh lmao
He’ll cheat on her one day and convince himself he’s in the right.
He’s a scheming liar so that’s certainly a possibility
@@Jujudajojo the hard part of cheating on a spouse ain’t the sex, and it ain’t finding a person to do it with. The hard part is looking the person you swore to love in the face and lying to them every day. If someone has proven they can look you in the face and lie, there’s nothing they couldn’t do.
@@MinisterManDan okay?🤨
@@MinisterManDan"the hard part (...) them every day."
Are you speaking from experience?
@@knrdvmmlbkkn just a guy who told himself that my spouse’s white lies weren’t that big a deal until I got the rude awakening.
So Jacob tells Angie that bringing her along was totally OP's idea, but she can't ask OP about it because it's a surprise? I think I would have realised there that something is up.
She a dunm
@@roisinwyer8592fr she's still clawing onto a cheater
It can happen if Jacob said OP expressed how Angie accompanying them would be great and help her with the depression but didn't want to ask her to accompany them, and he wanted to surprise her
Well, phrasing matters
Example
J: "Hey Angie, Op is talking about taking you with us but hasn't decided yet. So how about it?"
A: "But this is y'alls honeymoon. Does she really want me there. I'll call and ask, "
J: "Actually, i wanted to surprise her with it, so could you please not call her. I know she'll just love you tagging along. "
I would too, but Angie probably trusted her brother n didn't expect him to pull up something so weird like this.
Now they added another issue for depression on Angie .
She might blame herself for ruining her brother's marriage .
Makes you wonder if possibly the issues in her marriage had something to do with overbearing in-laws, doesnt it?
@@MinisterManDan they did mention that angies husband had an affair with a coworker
@@Fluff_againI'm not saying that cheating is ever justified but overbearing in-laws can drive a man to cheat. It's possible
The fact that he would go behind your back and do this is proof that he would jeopardize the relationship
look honey just divorce him. You win. For the rest of your life, when someone asks why, all you have to say is, "He tried to bring his sister on our honeymoon." You are triumphant forever. Just move on.
A lot of comments have been talking about Anullment over divorce as it's apparently faster and easier.
@@mill2712 Even better, then she can say she was never married. Because she wasn't. She was temporarily best friends with an incurable momma's boy who never had any intention of being a husband.
Not about being right or winning it is about being a priority to your spouse. Hubby demonstrated to her that she will never be his priority
@@bellasmom2597 Sure, that's a healthy way to frame things, I was framing them out of humor because of the Reddit/AITA/BORU bent of "who is the AH."
Yeah. Like that will bring her back the 7 years she spent on the relationship.
I just feel bad for Angie, OP can escape with a divorce, she has to deal with these people for the rest of her life unless she gets an escape rope
I don’t feel bad for her. She was sick in the head for wanting to go on another couple’s honeymoon regardless if she believe the lies or not.
@@eowyneadig7879sick in the head ?? 😭 thats taking it too far. shes WEIRD not psychotic.
@@eowyneadig7879Angie didn't ask to go on the honeymoon. She was told that op was okay with it.
Angie didn't do anything wrong. She even agreed with op and told her brother and mother what they did was wrong but they won't listen.
Instead making her sister feel better he just make it worst because she will feel guilty destroying her brother's marriage in just a month.
This is what happens when families don't establish healthy boundaries
It’s weird cuz they believe they’re just trying to be a happy family
No dear, boundary was set - husband just didn't care about his wife feelings
You don't have to defend yourself, op. It's weird as hell to expect to go on someone else's honeymoon.
OP should've gone for marriage annulment instead of divorce. Way faster and cheaper.
This guy understood everything he did. He's controlling, manipulative, and entitled. The only reason he went to therapy was so that therapy could straighten out HER thinking, and when that didn't happen, he was angry. These are all signs of abusive behavior (not the wanting to take the sister on their trip, but way it was done). A great book to read that explains this type of behavior in detail is "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft.
“A glorified vacation” yep I instantly disliked this guy after he said that.
Yeah, makes you wonder if he thinks marriage is a "glorified roommate relationship" deep down, too.
he used her and then tried to gaslight her, even his sister thinks he did wrong, literally doing a few things raised so many red flags, it's crazy, that he prefers to fight for his ego than for his wife.
There's no way she hasn't seen red before
He was manipulating the situation and he would have continued throughout the marriage. I'd have sacked him aswell. He actually did this to both you and his sister! I'm sure she was mortified!
Divorce speedrun
or even try to do annullment
Annulment if possible.
Hmm the future divorce is what is see stupid Op's husband is.
Probably anulment is the best option.
@@rene280195tf is the annulment I keep seeing? 20yrs of my life and reading so many Reddit stories and this is the first time I’m seeing the word
“He hasn’t stopped arguing with me” lmfao then block him and enjoy the beach
right lmao
Right, but common sense isn’t common apparently
That's her husband wtf
@@noshitsherlock5 and? He’s being an asshole and is refusing to see OPs side, refusing to take accountability, refusing to apologize and accept he’s wrong. He didn’t give a fck about her feelings but she’s supposed to be a good wife to him?
@@Jujudajojo well blocking her husband while she's on her trip certainly didn't click to me. She can put his chats archived or ignore him but what if something emergency happens? She's gonna call her husband. Possibly her parents pick up too but what if they are out of reach. She did the right thing talking about it in a mature way after coming home. And they were in a relationship for 7 years. It's not that simple it seems like.
The guy is a wuss.
They could have just have the mother and the sister take a vacation for themselves
Feels like mom wanted to tag along on her kid and DIL's dime "for the family", which is why they didn't plan a vacay for themselves.
Can someone please explain to me why it's the newlyweds responsibility to ensure that the groom's sister's happiness. Any idea of Third Wheeling somebody's honeymoon is disgusting to me.
The narcissism of both Op husband and Mil is strong with this one the only thing i see in their future is divorce.
So he did all of that to cheer his sister up to take her on the trip and didn’t even go with her after OP bailed on them… what was the real reason?!?! Chile, glad she left
The husband is already a liar and a weirdo for even suggesting that. The mother is intrusive and should know her place, if she wants her daughter to feel better there are thousands of ways, most of them better than this sh*t. And Angie is so weird, you have 26 years old and you think it's fun to third wheel your brother on his honeymoon? And then she throws him under the bus instantly! What a family
He's (the husband) just cutting off his nose to spite his face. He knows he's wrong because no one agrees with him but still not willing to grovel(which he should)
As she said in the post, he's more concerned about being right than doing right. His ego is more important to him than his marriage or even the person who he's supposedly trying to help
@@mr.halfrightI wonder how much it's actually him and how much it's just mommy calling the tune. Want to see how he behaves when mommy dearest suddenly admits she was in the wrong (not that it will ever happen)
Yep.
It's really the fact that Angie sees how wrong it was and has apologized even though she was blindsided too, but the Husband still can't see? Jfc.
He see he just can't admit hes wrong - the worst sort of people really
A honeymoon should be an experience between the newly weds, no third wheels. On your next wedding, Op, should asks her ex’s sister to be a Bridesmaid.
It was never about Angie, it was about control. Nora's control over Jacob, Jacob's control over OP/
So. This family is why SIL is so forgiving towards bad partner's.
The worst thing the husband did was the doubling down and tearing OP down that makes this impossible to get over/forgive. This guy is should marry his mom she the only woman he listens to.
I have FIVE SIBLINGS! I would never want to go on any of their honeymoons and I wouldn't want them to join me on mine. WTAF is going on in his and his mother's head?
Jacob and Nora are the arsehole. Funny how Angie was the reasonable one (I know it wasn't her idea)! Like I would be an entitled arsehole to asked my bro to come to his honeymoon when he got married. No I didn't get a divorse and became super depressed but even I know wedding and honeymoon are suppose to be "personal" than a regular holiday! Even then why couldn't Nora just send Angie to some holiday or event like a spa day when she said she would paid for her expenses?
Also how the heck the couple council went? Did Jacob didn't take the L? Hope Angie doesn't feel guilty if she think she was the reason they broke up?
From the way it sounds, it seems like Jacob and OP would come to some type of agreement in therapy and then afterwards he probably backtracked or took back whatever agreement(s) he made. The guy comes off as a Gaslighter, so I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case.
So they thought their wedding would stress the sis out but the honeymoon is a go? Nah, if the wedding is triggering for her then the honeymoon is too.
Now Angie has more guilt to unpack probably thinking this was her fault :/ poor woman. Im glad OP was able to get out but their ex and his mother are too stubborn for their own good
That Angie sounds like a keeper.
Nah, if she was she'd have checked with OP...the 'surprise' at the airport? She must have had some sort of inkling, no? Weird family IMO.
No. Usually MIL like Nora will interfere alot in such marriages . Not making life easy for you. Marriage is not only for about 2 people. It's about 2 families.
Divorce the man and marry his sister. Problem solved
LMAO!
game is game
Gosh, what the hell. Narcissistic family 😂
Dude, like what kind of mentality do you have to not understand the situation in hand?! The husband, stubborn as he is, doesn't see that he's the turmoil of the problem! The fact that these kinds of people exist, it's so painful to try to reason with them. But I'm glad that the sister in law is sane to see the situation, I just hope she goes away from that crazy family and finds someone that can truly love her.
I have never had an affair, no need , I was happy when I was happy, happy when I was alone. Very happy when I found someone new.
15:27 as someone with a sibling, I would be downright DISGUSTED to have them travel with me for a honeymoon. That's supposed to be private, intimate time to celebrate + strengthen your bond with your spouse without having to consider anyone else for once. It is meant to be a getaway, exclusive for the two of you, so anyone else sharing that (particularly family) smells like a violation.
and I can't see how NotDH thought of it as intimate/special for the 2 of them. Taking OP for ++granted? Best rid.
He showed you his true colors. Nothing more or less.
It's a honeymoon, and if he is willing to lie, conspire, and betray you in any way. Then he isn't ready to be in a relationship. This will become a pattern of behavior. OP doesn't even see how disrespectful he continues to be. A divorce was the right decision. When you're in a marriage communication is one of the pillars. An he didn't have a good foundation to begin with which is why that pillar crumbled.
There is absolutely NO WAY this is the first thing he's done to disrespect his relationship with OP. Im willing to bet that he has put his mom's wants over his partner's needs plenty of times but it was just on a smaller scale that she just let it go.
if the mom was going to pay for her why didn’t they just go on there own vacation?
So he said the sister shouldn't be involved in the wedding prep would raise unpleasant feelings for her (valid) but following them around on a romantic honeymoon is A-ok?
Nothing worse than a grownass momma’s boy
Let’s ignore the POS now stbx husband. Let’s take a sec to think about how Ms. Nora responded to her daughter’s pain. Instead of being there and providing comfort to her daughter who had her whole world shattered by her cheating ex, mommy dearest’s grand idea was to make said devastated daughter become a 3rd wheel on her brother’s & SIL’s honeymoon. So Angie is just meant to try & “enjoy herself” whilst being reminded of what she lost for an entire WEEK? Sounds to me like mommy didn’t want to deal with Angie crying and moping around her house and would rather push her off on others, while patting herself on the back. Even worse is Jacob was stupid enough to go along with it, when he was the one to originally tell oop, not to involve angie in the wedding prep because it might send her into another depressive episode, yet saw nothing wrong with her joining them on their honeymoon? 🙄
IF Jacob wasn't such a mamas boy, he would have seen that he was in the wrong!
Feels like a lot of the focus is about whether OP was right or wrong in not wanting sil there. For me that doesn't matter, major red flag is he went behind her back and lied to get what he thought was best. If he didn't discuss their difference if opinion beforehand and didn't see what was wrong with that then he would never treat her with respect and she could never trust him
HUGE red flag him going along with Mommy. As the youngest of 14 ( yes, some were already married with children), so I was babied by many. In NO WAY was I permitted to even spend a NIGHT at my sister's homes until they had been married for a while. Even if I was invited. My Mom said they just got married and need time alone.
The issue is that Jacob LIED to and about his wife. She couldn't ever truly trust him again.
As a man with several sisters whom I love dearly, this dude way fkn overstepped and was completely out of line. For him not to be able to see that his wife just needed this one occasion to be for them and then alone and not to be able to be there just that one time is unforgivable. He was tragically stupid and divorcing her was merciful.
I have a sister. I love her dearly... If I got married, I would NEVER take her on my honeymoon, no matter how bad her life is.
I'm calling it, both Nora and Jacob have a "savior complex".
For OP and her husband's relationship...as a Lucille Bluth once said 'this does not bode well'
He’s not shattered; he’s happily married to his mommy! Ugh!
I can't xDDD he didn't want his sister to be involved in the wedding's préparation because it could "make her sad", but it's okay to take her on the honeymoon ?? The most intimate part of it ?? XD
Let's give thanks to Nora for even demanding OP bring Angie to her honeymoon which resulted in a destroyed marriage. Ex is no better either. Good riddance.
so that's why Jacob popped the question AFTER 7 YEARS...... honestly glad OP finally get out of power abuse of those two
I would more than likely divorce him over that.
How the hell did this not end in annulment of the marrage?
Only simpletons bring their sister to their honeymoon.
Only a month into marriage and he already disrespects her boundaries and trumps over his wife over something that should always have been a shared decision. At some point, her ‘no’ will be disregarded as well and he will also gaslight her after the assault.
Divorce Jacob. Marry Angie. There I fix it.
I thought I was alone to think this, but there are so many comments abt that here, it's crazy!
Even Angie is telling them that they are in the wrong. I feel so sorry for Op for the divorce but it's the right choice.
I wonder what his friends told him?
I’m pretty sure they would say: “Dude, you f-ked up!”
Man, poor Angie, she is now part of TWO divorce stories.
The dude showed OP who he really was right there. Manipulative, gaslighty, doesn't see her as an equal in the marriage. Just all-round sucky.
Feel sorry for Angie, though, being caught in the middle of all that. Just think how she feels for being the reason (not the cause, that was the husband) that aother marriage fell apart. That's gotta be hell on her mental well-being.
He felt bad for his sister being divorced, so he got it himself too so she won’t feel being the only divorced one in the family. Such a great guy. Salute to him. Such a caring brother.
Why would Angie even want to third wheel on HONEYMOON when what she’s depressed about if her marriage falling apart. Also how do you surprise someone who also invited you?
I'm sorry, but...why was a divorce necessary? They'd only been married a couple of months. Surely an annulment would be WAY easier?
If I was Angie, being brought on someone’s honeymoon out of sympathy would feel worse then what I would be feeling right then and there. No one wants to be given a pity vacation on someone else’s honeymoon. That’s not right or fair on Angie whatsoever. She’s going through a tough patch but you can’t just pity her. Op needs to leave her husband. Even Angie said what he did was wrong and this was apparently all for her
I would have told Angie to join me on the solo trip and cheer eachother up
🤔
When Angie tried telling her mother and brother that she did not blame OP for being upset because she knew she would be too if she was in OPs shoes! She tried telling them that what they did was messed up and underhanded and they still refuse to listen is very telling of what kind of people they are! I hope Angie goes NC with them; maybe then they might realize how badly they screwed up!
So…the husband and mother in law not only went behind BOTH Op’s and Angie’s backs…ultimately setting her up for embarrassment and disappointment and then refuse to admit they were wrong…even after being told that by the very person they were trying to help/protect. Anyone else find that twisted?
The reality is it’s easy to get an annulment! She is just plain foolish to staying with someone like that!
Glad she got out of that marriage fast. Her ex can just marry his family if OP or anyone he marries again wont be the first priority.
Oh yeah we would all love to be the third wheel on someone's honeymoon? It would be a different thing if the parents also went along so they could entertain and go on trips with Angie, so the newlyweds could enjoy their time together without a third wheel to kill the mood
If I had a nickel for every time someone got invited to a honeymoon vacation, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice
At least spill the tea with us don't just write that without any details
@@lyraflow9154 I don’t remember the details as it was a while ago, I just remember that a partner invited a family member along to their honeymoon. They ended up getting divorced as well eventually
Yeah the OP's husband doesn't understand the issue wasn't his sister going on the honeymoon. It was the lying and gaslighting
The husband is a total nutcase. Refusing accountability and clinging to your ego and twisted principles will be the reason why karma will haunt you down.
The mere fact that you married your wife means that she and your future children will be your topmost priority. Your immediate family comes second. Because you are now starting to create your lives as husband and wife in helping one another. And building your relationship with trust, respect, love and commitment.
As for the wife, kuddos on your decision. I hope that you will get your another chance of a happy life soon.
DIVORCE !!! That’s all I’m going to say
if we get married , I am your family now.
We are our family , we come first.
Soooo um... did nobody think for more than 5 seconds about what the neighbors were gonna say?
Nora: Oh, my son is just too sweet! He invited his sister on his honeymoon! 🥰
Neighbors: *monkey giving bombastic sideye meme*
POV: she ends up remarrying Angie
Please, all real and false powers out there, make it happen!
I wonder how Angie feels now 🤔
I think she'll be more depress and blame herself for it. Well done for the brother and mother for making her feel worse instead of actually helping her 🙄🤦
So to help the sister who was hurt over her ruined marriage he ruined his own marriage? Smart move... 🙄 That's also super weird to invite someone else, anyone else on a honeymoon. It's kinda gross. It's also gross they just decided to bully OP into going around with this. OP should leave, immediately. He clearly doesn't respect her and went behind her back with his mom to manipulate her. His heart wasn't in the right place, if it was he would have found a better way to help his sister without the lies and manipulation. He'll do this again and completely disregard her feelings.
Some things should be exclusive to a couple.
Things like honeymoons.
Does he want his sister in the wedding bed too?
Making mistakes is forgivable.
Justifying mistakes is not.
Honestly if her husband is doing sneaky stuff like this within weeks of the marriage. I believe he was already sneaking around before.
At least Angie is on her side and is actively sticking up for her. She may lose a husband, but Angie can still be her friend.
Who in the hell wants to go with somebody on their honeymoon? That is odd and uncomfortable. They’re gonna want to do romantic cutesy stuff. Why would she want to be a third wheel for three weeks?
Was she suicidal or something?
even then sent her to a mental hospital not a vacation. But clearly sister wasn’t that depressed because she even realize yeah it’s kind of weird to go on your honeymoon with you. But if they wanted to cheer her up, they could’ve easily done a mommy and daughter weekend to the spa themselves why did she have to go so badly. And I have four siblings. I don’t want to go on nobodies honeymoon with them and they damn sure not coming. on mine.
Your mental health comes first.. I'm proud of you..I beleave u made all the right steps and then some.. so try to continue your life and be happy cause u deserve it😊
so who want to bet that angie is now blamimg herself now for them breaking up
Nora and Jacob give off such narcissistic vibes, there were probably prior signs, but OP was in that cloud that narcissists create. The way Jacob kept Angie out of the wedding was a sign too, they keep making sweeping decisions for adults and refuse to see how they're wrong. Even if it's obvious. Hope OP has a good lawyer, cause narcissists never divorce nicely.
You can't just break up and ghost him, but annulment as though the marriage never happened is on the table considering he invited his sister on the honeymoon. That would raise some judges and lawyers eyebrows about the legitimacy of the marriage and his intentions. May not even need to go through division of assets or full blown divorce. Either way, mention "incest" one time during the proceedings. It'll make things go faster.
After the divorce
Angie: (to her brother) You're just like my ex
How the hell this kind of people manage to get married and have a 7 years relationship
His mask came off as soon as the wedding was over. He didn't care about his wife's opinions or emotions, didn't care about lying to and about her and it would have just gotten worse and worse over time.