I went from being a social extrovert to now at 66 being 100% happiest being alone. I can't take noise, kids, dogs, corporate nonsense, chatter, crazy news....I just want quiet and peace. I don't have a TV, radio....I am so happy in my quiet place in life.
I’m 64 and work full time. I so look forward to coming home and just kicking back an putting on my most comfortable and ugly clothes. I tend to decline invitations from co workers because all that chatter tends to rattle my nerves. Solitude is like wrapping yourself in a warm and soft blanket..❤❤❤
@janeckhardt6032 I am with you on this Jane )). After talking all day to ppl I would choose not too, I am So so ready to get home and ask cozy. Do you have a date for retirement or just going with the flow?
So true 👍👍…I’ve always enjoyed solitude-I’m one of those people who feel MORE alone when I have to interact and socialize with others, just impossible to find a connection.
At 60 I removed every single person from my life. Hallelujah ❤ I got so tired of people interfering in all of my business. The peace of no people trying to tell me how to run my life is Bliss!
I am dealing with about two people who I Care about but madden me. I can’t cut them out of my life. I just can’t. So I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. And it’s miserable. How were you able to cut them out of your life? You said everybody. How did you do that? Any guilt?
I stopped collecting people like bad Christmas cards. I find being a generous stranger and encourager is far MORE than just empty relations. Thank you for your channel :) Refreshing .
You can’t imagine what your words have done for me tonight. My husband took his life in Feb, unable to deal with health issues he ignored or defied for years. 48 years together. I’ve been struggling to find my purpose. When you said, “I’m complete”, it resonated strongly. He was my true soul mate. He was a huge pain cuz he wouldn’t behave with medical issues. I loved him to his core. But he chose. I need to continue living. I don’t need another man. I had mine. I’ve taken very good care of myself all these years: I’m not going to waste anymore time. I am complete. I will serve others but I will enjoy my solitude. Thank you! 💝
I'm so sorry for your loss, my sister went through a similar situation with her husband. I really think you've got the right attitude to move forward and really embrace life as a solo woman. You've got this! Please know you can come here and share any time.
You are enough & you have been rich in love ; many of us are bankrupt in love due to giving so much love but never the reciprocation . I hope you have consolation in knowing that & I just betcha your husband wanted you not to suffer along beside him. So it was his way of releasing you from that vice.. As a nurse, I have often seen the s/o suffer more than the patient.
I’m 70 and I’ve discovered Life has a way of finding a way. & Life always fills in the blanks. I know you’re grateful you shared a life with the love of your life for so long. You’re in another “room” of your life. Beyond that grief, keep your head up and realize there are many other experiences yet to come. Very different ones yes. There is still life after love. Lots of life ❤
My home is my peaceful sanctuary. Happily divorced from an emotionally abusive man and living alone for past 20 years. No kids. And I rarely feel lonely. I am thankful everyday for my home, my health and my good friends.
I am 66 and live alone and LOVE it! When I was in my 50’s I felt so lonely and needed to find someone. That all changed at 60. Never feel lonely and love my solitude.
After you’ve been through a couple of wars you really don’t want anything to do with combat anymore. At 69 I live in peace and tranquility now. No more drama and trouble.
Im 60 and live alone. Its our society that drives us to seek solitude. Never imagined Id be in this situation but i feel content, stable and ok...i never did when i had a man in my life and a family...and a job...so much stress. Living alone is wonderful.
In my younger years, I hated the silence of being alone. Now I love it! I like my own space and the peace that comes with it. I no longer have the need to be validated by the presence of other people in my life 😊
I invited my colleague out to an event and she said no. I asked her why she doesnt go to many events outside of work and her answer was brilliant..."I enjoy my own company."
Me to. I hated being married gosh, always this like ok honey ok honey and that crazy gosh HONEY DO LIST all the time. Glad, that it is all over. Gosh, I feel like 20 again even being 68 LOL No more honey this and that F that big time halleluja !
@@DebbieKeirstead Me tooo! I did not enjoy the silent treatment, nasty words, my favorite thing was do you need anything? I guess he felt that was the only duty he had.
I genuinely cherish my alone time. Although, I do want to meet a companion and engage in a committed relationship in the long term, I'm just not settling. Even if this means I don't meet anyone I feel is right for me. 😊
I am 63 and my hobby is traveling the world. I travel alone but I am socializing frequently when I’m traveling. ( More interesting invitations are offered) But when I get back home, I keep to myself and I cherish it and it helps me reset.
I am 62, still working full-time and find myself staying home all weekend. And i love it. I really don't want to go out. I enjoy my time at home with my hubby and my dogs.
When my husband passed away, I was lost, lonely and not sure how I was going to fill the hole in my heart. Now, ten years later, I enjoy my solitude, crave it, in fact, and relish the time I do spend with my children and grandchildren and then very happy to get back to my needlework, books, gardening and my little bird. I have this peace now that wasn't there before and although I still miss my husband, especially at Christmas, I have noticed that I have grown into and appreciate my solitude now.
I am almost 70 and i crave solitude because I crave quiet and not so much kaos around me. I like the peace and quiet and ease of not so many distractions to overwhelm me. I dont have patience with others interfering with my time, and I dont have patience for wasting my time catering to others. I like people I just don't need a lot of them around me or to do what others want me to instead of what I want to do. It sounds selfish and shallow. But we spend a lot of our lives doing what we feel we have to or what others want or need. When we are older we are free to spend time as we choose. And we can refuse to have our time dominated by others. I'm not talking about not doing things that help others, but I am talking about freedom.
I am 69 and living alone with my dog and cats. I do have a partner that lives separately from me. Many people question this…I prefer solitary living. It gives me freedom to grow in many areas
After my divorce over 40 years ago, separate residences became a requirement before I started any new relationship....and there have only been 2 since then! Cloris Leachman said in order for everyone in a family to happily coexist, husband, wife and children each need their own house! Agree totally 😊😊😊
I'm in my 70's and enjoy my solitude. I, too, used to have to have people around or be going out at night before I had kids. Now I love being alone and like you, I never feel lonely. I always have things to do, as a homeowner and don't feel guilty about doing nothing at times. Yes, very liberating. I enjoy my life very much.
Me and my fur babies. Very calm and settled down life love it. Love coming home from work and getting ready to relax. But i choose this life and completely at peace with me❤
I’m 72 have been alone a little over 25 years. I’m not lonely or lonesome. I am just not interested in putting up with people that are “ surface” dwellers. I come & go as I please, do what I want when I want. I enjoy traveling and learning new things.
I am 65 and happily married, yet I enjoy my solitude. I love spending time with my husband, but I also enjoy my time alone in my art room. I spend hours alone painting, crocheting or other arty endeavors. My sweet husband loves to watch old movies, and science fiction. He spends a lot of time in front of the TV. We spend time together drinking our morning coffee, sometimes playing games, and going on an overnight trip about once a month. We also love staying home doing our own thing.
It’s been my experience that if you cannot find a quality partner or Quality friends, you are somewhat directed towards solitude. You just don’t want to waste your time on people that you cannot learn from or share the same likes. It’s natural.
That's a good point, and that can be very true. It can be true alone, or alongside with another point, it could also just be one hasn't found the right friend or friends or partner as yet, but sincerely does want a friend or two, or a partner in her life, and at the same time enjoy solitude. We can have both, we can be both, we can be many things at once, and desire many things at once. And be balanced.
I’m 64, and find I enjoy my solitude more and more as I age. Loneliness is a foreign concept to me. I’m married but my husband gives me my needed space ❤ he understands because he likes his alone time as well
Terrific video! My mother was also a narcissist and then I married one. I learned to spot them after my divorce. As we age, we become smarter & won’t be hood winked by all the lunatics out there. It’s so much more peaceful to live by yourself and choose if or when you want social interaction. Keep your inner circle very small & selective.
My daughter is a Narcissist! She doesn't care about me! Her husband and his family come before me! The Fucking Sacrifices I have made for her is absolutely unbelievable! As a mother, I was just there, now she says set boundaries! When we don't see each other! She doesn't check on me! I will be 63, April 2025, she says she will block me, because I send her too many messages, I just want to share, important information to her, I love sending her funny stuff, about cats, she is a cat mama! Wow! I love my mom she passed away in 2008 Spring March!
I find that people don't understand that seeking solitude is not being antisocial. Being an introvert, I find that some people are energy drainers and constant talkers and I just can't do it for longer periods of time. I try to always take my own car so I can escape, if need be. I live with bf and our dog in the country. We have our times of being out in the world as we both work, but as my work requires to be contstantly on, my home has become my sanctuary of peace. Thank goodness for nature...what a blessing.
Agreed. I used to feel obligated to "be involved," to pursue accomplishments, say yes to whatever my friends or family wanted of me. No more! I figure if anyone is bothered by my boundaries, I don't need that person in my life. It's so nice not spending big chunks of my weekend listening to other people go on about themselves. I used to think it was mean-spirited to blow off people, but no more.
BINGO! That's the crazy thing. I only use the phone for certain things and people! There is nothing worse than being on the phone with someone who talks about themselves for four hours.
one unexpected thing I have come to realize in my 60s is that I am more fascinated with people-watching (analogy to bird watching). I go to busy places and find someplace to sit so as to not be noticed, and I watch people, and in that watching I feel a connection, a feeling like the feeling of having friends or colleagues when I was younger.
I have always been an introvert but it has increased greatly (I'm in my sixties). I can be alone for extended periods of time and never feel an urge to be with others. I think there are a few factors at play in people who are at this point in life; you've literally reached your saturation point for bulls__t and drama, you have found things in life that you are genuinely interested in and love pursuing, you've mastered cooking to the point that every meal you make for yourself is magnificent (in your own opinion - lol). You have learned the principals of decorating so you have your home arrainged in a way that makes you feel good to be in it, no matter your income level. Your children are grown and the hard work and responsibility that comes with that is over. You have the confidence that comes with having a long, strong background of experience in nearly everything that is required of you. People can't fool you anymore, fate can't surprise you much and you've learned what is genuinely interesting to you. I could ramble on more, but I won't. I'll say that I wish I hadn't been so damed afraid of everything and unsure of myself when I was young!
I am 60 yrs old and live solo. I enjoy serving at my church outreach center. Afterwards, I am very content coming home to my peaceful sanctuary. I treasure my alone time. It is a blessing and a gift. 😌💖
Im 70 and happy being independent in my own home. I have a cat,dog and 2 parrots. ( No kids) I do luv children though. I go out with friends. I never did need a man to complete me. Im divorced for 40 yrs. Had relationships but the men all betrayed me. Im happier with my single life. You are your own best friend and need to luv yourself to be truly happy.❤
There is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Also being comfortable with your own company is extremely important. Having quality friends and/or relationships are hard to find. I refuse to settle for less just so I can have society see me as “normal” and not alone. It is very possible to be alone and thriving each day living your best life whatever that may be for you.🦋🧿
Aging is one of the bookends in life....I've returned back to that girl I was before puberty hit.....Its a joy. I had similar experience with my mother, and again attracted people with some of the same attributes. No More. It's simply a joy to discover me again, I have kids and grandkids so don't feel lonely and I am much better at reading people and setting boundaries, but you don't get to this level of grace without some pain...what a trip..🇦🇺
Lots of us with those narc mothers! We all seem to have had the same life path! Thank goodness we survived and came through it all ......to embrace solitude and find peace!
20 дней назад+2
I’m alone, but not lonely and I love it. I love being in control of my own wants and needs without getting the approval of someone else. Once you’ve been in a situation where you’ve had to answer to someone else all the time, finally getting the freedom to make your own decisions is very liberating.
I am 64. And I love spending time by myself. I look forward to the days where there’s nothing on my calendar and I can just relax and spend time doing what I want to do such as my art projects, gardening, and reading, and snoozing. I feel myself pulling away from social events and people who want to be my friend that I really don’t share anything in common with. I now just have a few close friends that I call my soul sisters. I am not interested in spending time with people who do not share my beliefs or who are not on my path. I’ve never been happier.
Dittos! I don't have time for people who don't share my values. They're not friends, just acquaintances and I don't enjoy their company. I agree - soul sisters are enough!
I’m 67 and came from a very dysfunctional home. I craved friends and what I thought normality. Just made me a target for a doormat! My kindness was abused when I couldn’t say no. Not sure when I was done with that stage in my life! Menopause ? It’s liberating! Married to a wonderful man for almost 50 yrs and we have two adult kids we’re very close to and one grandson. They are all the company I need!
I am 63. For the last several years I have been sad and depressed that my adult children don't come for the holidays anymore. They have prioritized their own families, in-laws and holiday vacations. This year, I am elated! I sent them their Christmas cards in the mail and am enjoying the holiday season in peace and quiet. I roasted a turkey for Thanksgiving and put up my Christmas tree just for ME! I do believe it's a process though.
@@Mindy-r2s I’m 63 and have the same situation. My kids don’t understand the importance of extended family . I thought I raised them to understand that but I guess I didn’t but that’s on them. I lived it and spoke of it a lot. I have surrendered that values are different now and that doesn’t mean I have to be right. It is just such a foreign concept and unexpected. Now…to find me and what I love. I decorated my home beautifully for Christmas. No one has seen it but I have so enjoyed it.
I'm tired of accommodating other people's desires,of tolerating the unreasonable/difficult ones, of worrying about what others think of me, of being bullied/scorned/used, of being told what to do all the time, and the list goes on.
Hi! First let me say, I’m 64 and am so happy I found your videos. Your topics have been exactly what’s been on my mind. You’ve been very helpful. Your title here has made me laugh because a few years ago, I googled, “I’m 61 and I don’t like being around anyone anymore”. I laughed so hard when the answer was, “This is the natural progression of aging”.
I am so glad I found your channel! I think you're right on point with everything you said about aging and how we spend our time. I think back to when I was younger and how much time I used to waste on people chasing after relationships that were really nonexistent. This included family members, too. My mother was also narcissistic. It was her way of surviving a traumatic life when she was younger, so I understand why she was the way she was, but it doesn't negate the damage it did to those around her. She died three and a half years ago, and I found that I don't miss her. I miss her love but not her mental illness and controlling nature. Since she passed, i really have blossomed. I have really grown spiritually and emotionally, and I'm finally comfortable being my authentic self without fear of ridicule or judgment from her. I also agree with you about wanting to spend more time alone and not having many friends. What I realized was that the people I thought were my friends when I was younger weren't. I have one true friend now, and she means the world to me. I am rich. As for living alone, there's nothing wrong with it in my opinion. I was 47 when I met my husband and married him when I was 49. I never felt like I needed a man to complete me, but I will say that my husband adds to my abundance, and i'm thankful. I agree with you also about being selective who you spend your time with. I get more excited about being at home on the couch with a hot cup of tea watching t v with Mike than anything else. I found that the fewer of the years I have in front of me, the more selective I am with whom I spend my time. Time is a valuable commodity that can never be reaobtained. I've also removed toxic people from my life. Most of those people were family that either died or I just decided to cut ties with. The hardest thing I had to realize in this lifetime is that just because you are born into this family, it does not mean you belong to this family. I have had many soul connections with people not related to me, and the relationships with them ran deeper than anything I had with family members. I've subscribed to your channel and will continue watching your videos. I would love a tour of your home if you wouldn't mind. I really like your decorating style.
Thank you Holly for your beautiful Light and incredible soul. At age 75 I live alone . I have lived a life in and out of relationships trying my best to be the person that would fit into the mold of each relationship I was in. I have learned to love living alone now and have been single for nearly 7 years and enjoying it ! Now at my age I find it so much better and easier to actually be totally myself doing what I want as opposed to doing things that have the approval of a partner. Freedom and independence is way more important to me than having to focus energy on another individual and attempting to make their lives fit into my own vision for myself. I totally agree with your philosophy as it is my own now. Bless you always.
Im glad i found this , im 58 and bored with meeting with freinds for coffee , talkin about the same thing over and over , i love being at home with my hubbie and dog , my parents are gone and i have no kids , im happy though , i hate going to other peoples houses , i clock watch until i can go home , hate small talk !!!! I used to be a party animal !!!! 😂
I absolutely adore being home! I’ve raised four boys and I’m tired. I was raised by two narcissists.. walking on eggshells and pleasing people was my life. I’m over it!! I love my own company. I feel like my nervous system is healing during my quiet times alone.
Funny, I was just thinking about this last night! I realized that I was content and grateful to live alone. Im 64 and was divorced 16 years ago. Went crazy, had to live in group homes to survive, was homeless at 1 point. However, I recovered in 2018 and live with my cat, Burt, in a nice, safe apartment . Yes, there are some ups and downs but I pray to never live with strangers and narcissists again. I am grateful for my solitary freedom.
Yes, yes, yes! Just the other day I told my daughter-in-law I am just not into large gatherings anymore. Family is fine but when it includes friends of friends, of friends, I’m out. It was a gentle nudge so she’ll remember that as I decline party gatherings. I’ve been alone since 2006, and I am for the most part very happy with it. What I miss most often is good intellectual conversation with others on a broad range of topics. It just doesn’t happen in our me, me, me society. There are many things to learn from ourselves if we just take the time and be alone with ourselves. Thanks for a great video. 🌲
I am 75 and really on my own since 3 years.. it was hard in the beginning. I felt Forgotten...but now for the first time i went shopping and bought things for me...i did not have one thought over what the others that might come visit me would like!!! I am so happy... I have 2 ponys, 2 chickens and a cat and that is enough.. I have some good friends and thats a tressure... I am starting to become me again and am happy...
Thank you for bringing this topic to life. I feel that solitude (or even isolation) heals me and brings me peace. Somehow, people are ok in small doses for me... then I need to retrieve into my space with books, silence, quiet surroundings, writing and painting, listening to birds and gentle breeze in the presence of trees... and my dog... that is where I find true joyful existence... I know people who might just lose their mind living my life, but my inner monk thrives there. And I am nowhere near 60 yet 😊
Those who choose solutide no longer feel the need to live up to anyone else's standards. They are comfortable in their own skin, and they appreciate life's simplicity. Small talk is exhausting. I'm 48.
I’m only 40 and feel the strong need to isolate. I don’t know if it’s because of past trauma or the fact that I can’t tolerate people’s bs anymore. Spending time outdoors gardening really does wonders for the soul.
I just discovered your channel,(happy new subscriber) 🥰this video is so me.. I am 63, single (happily)...I live alone and LOVE it, after divorce, and a second failed relationship of 7 years, I knew i was done.. this was 15years ago. 2 grown sons, they are my life..I have a couple of close friends... Solitude for me,, is exacly how u described it girl!!! 💜
I live with family but absolutely love solitude! I love it when everyone goes off to school and work! I rarely socialize and I’m fine with that. 72 years old and enjoying my peace!
Im 60 yr old guy been through all that ,now im single and live alone ,own my house outright, carry little debt and love my solitude and don't mind it at all ,I suffer 0 depression I still have alot of friends and family around not far away, but I love chilling at home doing outside projects and improvements on my property ,that's where I get my high from ,I quit drinking and smoking years ago ,id take a woman like you though your a beauty ❤.
I was born profoundly deaf. Most deaf folks like Helen Keller lost their hearing or sight or both in their toddler years and it makes a difference. I love my solitude years after going into my 60's. I loved my college years and co-workers for years! Now I'm 67 and enjoying myself with reading and watching movies on my tablet.
My husband passed away 3 years ago. He was a narcissist. I moved to a completely new community. I'm delighted to have my own house that is just mine. I have a tiny circle of friends that I see infrequently. And I absolutely love doing exactly what I want to do and when I want to do it. I don't feel lonely. In the last few years of my working life I really disliked the amount of time I was giving away to other people, and they were people who I would not otherwise have chosen to spend time with. I'm delighted to be retired and on my own.
I love being alone but I also love hanging out with my family; we play games, etc…I feel very depressed when alone too long and will do things that are unhealthy like watch You Tube too much or eat unhealthy. I wish I had more friends that were more like me; my friends are very different, so I have to really feel like hanging out with them. I think we all need other humans.
I realized during the ridiculous LOCK DOWN that it didn’t change my life at all. I was good with it, Other than the stupid masking which we all know was useless, but the point is even that isolating business didn’t really bother me as I thought it might. ( not regarding people who suffered) talking only about being away from society. It was quite the eye opener for so many reasons.
When my 2nd ex moved out of my house, I remember the ocean of peace that I was able to dive into when I came home for the first time to an empty house. I breathed so deeply! It was and still is fantastic!!!
I have been divorced since 2000. I love being on my own. I am very much of an introvert so I can go days without talking to anybody. I retired a couple of years ago. I am a very complete person, happy, contented, and my life is very rich. I do have Several really good friends. I don’t care about having lots and lots of people that I consider friends they’re more of acquaintances. Good for you. I think it’s very important to learn to know yourself and like yourself. I enjoy spending time with me.!!
I am married yet each of us have our own spaces. He likes to watch his old westerns and I like to read and watch decorating videos. So we each have our rooms yet met up when we want companionship. It works for us. ❤
I’m 58 and living apart from my spouse due to his being in sober living for an indefinite period of time. I’ve lived alone for a year and off and on for several years before that due to our separation because of his alcoholism. What I’ve discovered is that I enjoy my solitude and have found such peace and joy in it. I’m not lonely. I find I have time to do things I enjoy like reading, art, learning and researching, etc. I work still and go out with friends occasionally, but if I have a preference, I enjoy my solitude! 😂
Amen sister! I love my solitude, people get uncomfortable when you choose a different path no matter what it is. For some reason it threatens them. If you are different they don’t like it. Stay unique we need more unicorns in the world.
I completly stopped dating about age 45. I choose being single. I have family and friends but i realized that i was more unhappy in a relationship than being on my own. Divorce happened and i didnt have that Christ centered marriage i should've had so it fell apart. I have the Lord in my heart and get peace from that. Have my fur baby that comforts me too.
I have been on my own for years & love it. I call it. 90-10 world, about 10% of the time I think it would be nice to have someone around. But , 90% of the time I am perfectly happy living a slow life. Excessive social interactions drain me. Overly extroverts drain me, can take days to recover 🤣
I've always been happy on my own or just with a few close family. My mom said even as a little child she would invite playmates round but I was always happier amusing myself! I do clearly remember enjoying playing on my own with my dolls and teddies and making up stories about them. I can't stand making small talk - socialising with people I don't know that well is my worst nightmare - it's totally draining I find.
Reading all the other comments and feeling like I'm in good company! I work FT in quite a demanding job so when I come home I want totally and complete silence and solitude. What use to be punishment for me, is now reward. Imagine the joy now of being grounded. 😁
I found going on a quiet retreat in 30's was hard, I bet at 65, it wouldn't be. The quiet would be fine. My sister is alone and in an condo she can manage and had a guy friend for a year or two, but found it sufficating at times. She realized about 20 years divorced, she didn't want to be cooking for him or having to always compromise, she liked outings but didn't want to live with him. She likes to watch what she wants to watch, listen to her type of music, loves to read and visit her grandkids. Nothing wrong with it if you love it.
Absolutely! I relish my solitude. I have even named my home Sweet Solitude Retreat. However, this didn’t start in my 60s. I have always been an introvert.
Seems like many discovered their introversion during COVID, along with not liking to dress appropriately in public and just becoming lazier in general. Introversion and narcissism also became diluted in their true meaning now being applied indiscriminately.
Ive never sought social interaction and now i'm older (74), I've stopped being guilt-tripped about it. I occasionally go to functions where there is something to be gained eg information or entertainment. Im polite and responsive to people who speak to me, but i dont hang around just to socialize. I have always been shy, but on top of that i think its that i dont expect to get any pleasure or satisfaction from interation with others. If course, sometimes i do, but the odds are against it. Thats just the way i am, but if others dont approve, that's too bad.
I’m 56 and I crave real connections, not small talk. I don’t need anyone to complete me or make me happy, but I’d love to share my happiness with special people. Great video ❤
You look terrific for your age! Happy Birthday 🎈🎉🎁. I’m definitely lonely. At first I thought it was nice being alone but that wore off pretty fast. I miss having a sex life. Cuddling, kissing, touching each other. Have a nice evening. 😊
Solitude is my autonomy. My life is 90% solitude and 10% loneliness. To ward off loneliness I change my routine; take a trip; get together with friends. Mix it up. My wife passed from cancer 6 years,ago. I retired, downsized, sold the house and moved to a place accessible but not too close to my adult children. I have emancipated myself from negative people and influences in my life but it has taken a period of sustained introspection. Get off social media. Bring your circle of loved ones close. Practice kindness in all that you do. Be well. I hope you find spiritual renewal, mental and physical health through an attitude of gratitude. Godspeed in your journey.
I have always been "the lone ranger" - more or less. Now in my old age its hard to tell the difference - is it really that I "enjoy being alone" or that I just don't want all the drama and hard work it takes to have other people around me all of the time. When I was a boy I often would go off alone and find a place to lie on the ground or up in a tree and just watch the world around me...sky, clouds, birds, sounds...sometimes I would walk the mile down to the local theater and watch a movie alone... Other people around are like a weight on my head sometimes. If thrown into a social environment I am quite good at "small talk" - but can't wait to get back home and alone again.
I’m 52 and adore my solitude …. Driving … having one drink by a hotel bar .. staying alone in a hotel room …. Having dinner alone … cooking for hours alone … great times
I am 61. Ha e 4 children and grandbaby number 5 on the way. I work and am out of the house more than I want to be. All I think about is when I can be home. I feel grounded and safe and it’s quiet and calm. I am married and solitude is important for both of us. We find time each day to be able to have those solitude times. Makes a big difference. Thanks for sharing
I am 47 and I have always craved solitude. It seldom, if ever, occurs to me to reach out to anyone. I am quite happy alone, and after back to back relationships with abusive narcissists, being alone feels like winning the lottery.
I am 64 and this is so me! After a lifetime of people pleasing, I just don't have loads of social energy left. Everyone seems to want me around when they need something from me, and only then. It is draining. And I am so done. I love solitude and peace.
Oh my, you are speaking to ME! Although I am married (happily), I find myself needing what I call "alone time" and if I don't get it, I can become very edgy. My husband is retired, like me, and goes to Europe twice a year for two weeks to visit a step son. I treasure those two weeks to have for myself! I also fantasize about living in a little two bedroom condo in some European country BY MYSELF. I have gotten past the guilt of this! I love your channel!
I can very much relate. Since turning 60, I feel like’ve become somewhat antisocial and was feeling I was alone in this. It’s so validating to hear that others feel similarly.
I am sitting in the desert right now ALONE, no neighbors...I live in a Van and travel the country. I have my dog, shes all I need. I love this life and purposefully seek out places to stay away from people. I can see the night sky with no light interruptions, stunningly gorgeous. Living in a town or city now I find it rapes my senses. We were designed to use all our senses but most lifestyles destroy them. My hearing and eyesight have improved. My mental and physical health have improved. Minimalism has me intouch with myself. No one better to be with than myself. #fearless #fiercewomen #ascension #mentalhealth
Wow, that sounds great and you've inspired me to try it out. Pure night sky with no sound would be great. I live in a City, but do my best to navigate around stress and people, and find the pools of tranquility where I can. Meditation and trying for presence can help a lot too.
I went from being a social extrovert to now at 66 being 100% happiest being alone. I can't take noise, kids, dogs, corporate nonsense, chatter, crazy news....I just want quiet and peace. I don't have a TV, radio....I am so happy in my quiet place in life.
I am the same. Love it❤
Sometime in your fifties you lose your need for validation. It's very liberating.
@@davedamiano Iam in my 70s,and just married 2 yrs. Ago to a man in his 60s.
It is liberating!! Whew, what a relief.
Yep!!! ✌🏼
HELLO!!!!!!!! We're perfectally validated within ourselves !!!!! 😅
@JuliaKimmel-d9n Sensitive subject get more responses
I’m 64 and work full time. I so look forward to coming home and just kicking back an putting on my most comfortable and ugly clothes. I tend to decline invitations from co workers because all that chatter tends to rattle my nerves. Solitude is like wrapping yourself in a warm and soft blanket..❤❤❤
You could not of said it better 🎉
@janeckhardt6032 I am with you on this Jane )). After talking all day to ppl I would choose not too, I am So so ready to get home and ask cozy. Do you have a date for retirement or just going with the flow?
@@JuliaKimmel-d9n I 3rd that, Lol ;)
Exactly same. 😂
I hope to retire in about two years. Freedom at last.😀😀😀
When you’re young you sneak out of the house to go to parties. When you’re older you sneak out of the parties to go home.
LOL!!
😂 👍🏻
So true! 😂
This is so true!!!!
So funny and true!!!
I’m 66. I’m alone and don’t feel lonely at all. I have my dog and my sister lives nearby. We are close. That’s all I need. ❤
Amen
@@motherterezzza3466 as long as we have our dogs mother ;)).....right. We are never really alone 😊
I'm glad I'm not alone feeling like this, I enjoy having solitude!
So true 👍👍…I’ve always enjoyed solitude-I’m one of those people who feel MORE alone when I have to interact and socialize with others, just impossible to find a connection.
@@richard-mr1vz HeyI think you two could cuddle in the blanket and forget clothes.
@margogreen8619 Solitude is nice at times Margo I agree.
I’m going to be 66 next month. I’ve been living alone for over a decade
and I ❤ it. Solitude is heaven 😊
Oh w/o a doubt, especially in this noisy and phone-centric world, I find solace in serenity and solitude 👍👍.
Yes yes yes !!!!
At 60 I removed every single person from my life. Hallelujah ❤ I got so tired of people interfering in all of my business. The peace of no people trying to tell me how to run my life is Bliss!
ditto: bliss! I'm 60.
I am dealing with about two people who I Care about but madden me. I can’t cut them out of my life. I just can’t. So I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. And it’s miserable. How were you able to cut them out of your life? You said everybody. How did you do that? Any guilt?
Ditto❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Yeah, I'm down to three people and it's nice!
(although, if I'm honest, I really would enjoy having a woman to do nothing with;)
I stopped collecting people like bad Christmas cards.
I find being a generous stranger and encourager is far MORE than just empty relations.
Thank you for your channel :)
Refreshing .
You can’t imagine what your words have done for me tonight. My husband took his life in Feb, unable to deal with health issues he ignored or defied for years. 48 years together.
I’ve been struggling to find my purpose. When you said, “I’m complete”, it resonated strongly.
He was my true soul mate. He was a huge pain cuz he wouldn’t behave with medical issues. I loved him to his core.
But he chose. I need to continue living. I don’t need another man. I had mine.
I’ve taken very good care of myself all these years: I’m not going to waste anymore time.
I am complete.
I will serve others but I will enjoy my solitude.
Thank you! 💝
I'm so sorry for your loss, my sister went through a similar situation with her husband. I really think you've got the right attitude to move forward and really embrace life as a solo woman. You've got this! Please know you can come here and share any time.
You are enough & you have been rich in love ; many of us are bankrupt in love due to giving so much love but never the reciprocation . I hope you have consolation in knowing that & I just betcha your husband wanted you not to suffer along beside him. So it was his way of releasing you from that vice.. As a nurse, I have often seen the
s/o suffer more than the patient.
I’m 70 and I’ve discovered Life has a way of finding a way. & Life always fills in the blanks. I know you’re grateful you shared a life with the love of your life for so long. You’re in another “room” of your life. Beyond that grief, keep your head up and realize there are many other experiences yet to come. Very different ones yes. There is still life after love. Lots of life ❤
God bless
I am so very sorry for your loss...my deepest condolences 😔❤
Omg I just found your channel. I’m 58, married, but love being alone. I get so excited when my husband travels and it’s just myself and the dog.
Welcome!!
My home is my peaceful sanctuary. Happily divorced from an emotionally abusive man and living alone for past 20 years. No kids. And I rarely feel lonely.
I am thankful everyday for my home, my health and my good friends.
Praise Jesus 🙏
I am 66 and live alone and LOVE it! When I was in my 50’s I felt so lonely and needed to find someone. That all changed at 60. Never feel lonely and love my solitude.
Me too! I am 67.
After you’ve been through a couple of wars you really don’t want anything to do with combat anymore. At 69 I live in peace and tranquility now. No more drama and trouble.
Yes
Well said. Like leaving a war torn country and never wanting to go back.
Im 60 and live alone. Its our society that drives us to seek solitude. Never imagined Id be in this situation but i feel content, stable and ok...i never did when i had a man in my life and a family...and a job...so much stress. Living alone is wonderful.
In my younger years, I hated the silence of being alone. Now I love it! I like my own space and the peace that comes with it. I no longer have the need to be validated by the presence of other people in my life 😊
I invited my colleague out to an event and she said no. I asked her why she doesnt go to many events outside of work and her answer was brilliant..."I enjoy my own company."
Love my alone time. Never lonely. Was lonely when i was married.
Me to. I hated being married gosh, always this like ok honey ok honey and that crazy gosh HONEY DO LIST all the time. Glad, that it is all over. Gosh, I feel like 20 again even being 68 LOL No more honey this and that F that big time halleluja !
@@DebbieKeirstead Me tooo! I did not enjoy the silent treatment, nasty words, my favorite thing was do you need anything? I guess he felt that was the only duty he had.
I genuinely cherish my alone time. Although, I do want to meet a companion and engage in a committed relationship in the long term, I'm just not settling. Even if this means I don't meet anyone I feel is right for me. 😊
I am 63 and my hobby is traveling the world. I travel alone but I am socializing frequently when I’m traveling. ( More interesting invitations are offered) But when I get back home, I keep to myself and I cherish it and it helps me reset.
Sorry to hear this Debbie but glad that you are in a better place now. We live and learn I guess ...right. No one wants the silent treatment for sure.
I am 62, still working full-time and find myself staying home all weekend. And i love it. I really don't want to go out. I enjoy my time at home with my hubby and my dogs.
When my husband passed away, I was lost, lonely and not sure how I was going to fill the hole in my heart. Now, ten years later, I enjoy my solitude, crave it, in fact, and relish the time I do spend with my children and grandchildren and then very happy to get back to my needlework, books, gardening and my little bird. I have this peace now that wasn't there before and although I still miss my husband, especially at Christmas, I have noticed that I have grown into and appreciate my solitude now.
I like that thought of "growing into" I struggle with getting older
I am almost 70 and i crave solitude because I crave quiet and not so much kaos around me. I like the peace and quiet and ease of not so many distractions to overwhelm me. I dont have patience with others interfering with my time, and I dont have patience for wasting my time catering to others. I like people I just don't need a lot of them around me or to do what others want me to instead of what I want to do. It sounds selfish and shallow. But we spend a lot of our lives doing what we feel we have to or what others want or need. When we are older we are free to spend time as we choose. And we can refuse to have our time dominated by others. I'm not talking about not doing things that help others, but I am talking about freedom.
One of my favourite quotes;
‘I’m going on holiday with my best friend.’
Who with?
Myself!
I am 69 and living alone with my dog and cats. I do have a partner that lives separately from me. Many people question this…I prefer solitary living. It gives me freedom to grow in many areas
That’s the perfect partnership 🤗
After my divorce over 40 years ago, separate residences became a requirement before I started any new relationship....and there have only been 2 since then! Cloris Leachman said in order for everyone in a family to happily coexist, husband, wife and children each need their own house! Agree totally 😊😊😊
I'm in my 70's and enjoy my solitude. I, too, used to have to have people around or be going out at night before I had kids. Now I love being alone and like you, I never feel lonely. I always have things to do, as a homeowner and don't feel guilty about doing nothing at times. Yes, very liberating. I enjoy my life very much.
Me and my fur babies. Very calm and settled down life love it. Love coming home from work and getting ready to relax. But i choose this life and completely at peace with me❤
I’m 72 have been alone a little over 25 years. I’m not lonely or lonesome. I am just not interested in putting up with people that are “ surface” dwellers. I come & go as I please, do what I want when I want. I enjoy traveling and learning new things.
I am 65 and happily married, yet I enjoy my solitude. I love spending time with my husband, but I also enjoy my time alone in my art room. I spend hours alone painting, crocheting or other arty endeavors. My sweet husband loves to watch old movies, and science fiction. He spends a lot of time in front of the TV. We spend time together drinking our morning coffee, sometimes playing games, and going on an overnight trip about once a month. We also love staying home doing our own thing.
Thanks for sharing!!
It’s been my experience that if you cannot find a quality partner or Quality friends, you are somewhat directed towards solitude. You just don’t want to waste your time on people that you cannot learn from or share the same likes. It’s natural.
I agree, @dav3016.
@@dav3016 How old are you,may I ask?
That's a good point, and that can be very true. It can be true alone, or alongside with another point, it could also just be one hasn't found the right friend or friends or partner as yet, but sincerely does want a friend or two, or a partner in her life, and at the same time enjoy solitude. We can have both, we can be both, we can be many things at once, and desire many things at once. And be balanced.
@@dav3016 quality can be found in books or RUclips videos even when it seems scarce IRL
@sleepingwithcats5121 agreed.
I’m 64, and find I enjoy my solitude more and more as I age. Loneliness is a foreign concept to me. I’m married but my husband gives me my needed space ❤ he understands because he likes his alone time as well
@margaretcook-ellis4941 I am with your here Margaret. We all do need our own time and space. Glad there are some women who still see it like this. )
At 64 I have discovered that I enjoy my own company. I don't need people in my life, now I choose who comes into my life and for how long they stay
Terrific video! My mother was also a narcissist and then I married one. I learned to spot them after my divorce. As we age, we become smarter & won’t be hood winked by all the lunatics out there. It’s so much more peaceful to live by yourself and choose if or when you want social interaction. Keep your inner circle very small & selective.
Thank goodness we become smarter! Thanks for sharing
Totally agree!
My daughter is a Narcissist! She doesn't care about me! Her husband and his family come before me! The Fucking Sacrifices I have made for her is absolutely unbelievable! As a mother, I was just there, now she says set boundaries! When we don't see each other! She doesn't check on me! I will be 63, April 2025, she says she will block me, because I send her too many messages, I just want to share, important information to her, I love sending her funny stuff, about cats, she is a cat mama! Wow! I love my mom she passed away in 2008 Spring March!
I find that people don't understand that seeking solitude is not being antisocial. Being an introvert, I find that some people are energy drainers and constant talkers and I just can't do it for longer periods of time. I try to always take my own car so I can escape, if need be. I live with bf and our dog in the country. We have our times of being out in the world as we both work, but as my work requires to be contstantly on, my home has become my sanctuary of peace. Thank goodness for nature...what a blessing.
Yes. I know someone I really try to avoid because they talk nonstop 🤦🏽♀️
It wears me out.
Agreed. I used to feel obligated to "be involved," to pursue accomplishments, say yes to whatever my friends or family wanted of me. No more! I figure if anyone is bothered by my boundaries, I don't need that person in my life. It's so nice not spending big chunks of my weekend listening to other people go on about themselves. I used to think it was mean-spirited to blow off people, but no more.
BINGO! That's the crazy thing. I only use the phone for certain things and people! There is nothing worse than being on the phone with someone who talks about themselves for four hours.
I’m 66 and have lived happily alone for six years. I love my solitude.
one unexpected thing I have come to realize in my 60s is that I am more fascinated with people-watching (analogy to bird watching). I go to busy places and find someplace to sit so as to not be noticed, and I watch people, and in that watching I feel a connection, a feeling like the feeling of having friends or colleagues when I was younger.
I have always been an introvert but it has increased greatly (I'm in my sixties). I can be alone for extended periods of time and never feel an urge to be with others. I think there are a few factors at play in people who are at this point in life; you've literally reached your saturation point for bulls__t and drama, you have found things in life that you are genuinely interested in and love pursuing, you've mastered cooking to the point that every meal you make for yourself is magnificent (in your own opinion - lol). You have learned the principals of decorating so you have your home arrainged in a way that makes you feel good to be in it, no matter your income level. Your children are grown and the hard work and responsibility that comes with that is over. You have the confidence that comes with having a long, strong background of experience in nearly everything that is required of you. People can't fool you anymore, fate can't surprise you much and you've learned what is genuinely interesting to you. I could ramble on more, but I won't. I'll say that I wish I hadn't been so damed afraid of everything and unsure of myself when I was young!
I am 60 yrs old and live solo. I enjoy serving at my church outreach center. Afterwards, I am very content coming home to my peaceful sanctuary. I treasure my alone time. It is a blessing and a gift. 😌💖
Im 70 and happy being independent in my own home. I have a cat,dog and 2 parrots. ( No kids) I do luv children though. I go out with friends. I never did need a man to complete me. Im divorced for 40 yrs. Had relationships but the men all betrayed me. Im happier with my single life. You are your own best friend and need to luv yourself to be truly happy.❤
There is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Also being comfortable with your own company is extremely important. Having quality friends and/or relationships are hard to find. I refuse to settle for less just so I can have society see me as “normal” and not alone. It is very possible to be alone and thriving each day living your best life whatever that may be for you.🦋🧿
I AM SO CONTENT WITH BEING ALONE, I LOVE IT, DONT THINK I LIKE BEING AROUND PEOPLE ANYMORE, NOT IN A WEIRD WAY BUT A HEALTHY WAY❤
Aging is one of the bookends in life....I've returned back to that girl I was before puberty hit.....Its a joy. I had similar experience with my mother, and again attracted people with some of the same attributes. No More. It's simply a joy to discover me again, I have kids and grandkids so don't feel lonely and I am much better at reading people and setting boundaries, but you don't get to this level of grace without some pain...what a trip..🇦🇺
I feel like your describing me 😊
Me too.
Lots of us with those narc mothers! We all seem to have had the same life path! Thank goodness we survived and came through it all ......to embrace solitude and find peace!
I’m alone, but not lonely and I love it. I love being in control of my own wants and needs without getting the approval of someone else. Once you’ve been in a situation where you’ve had to answer to someone else all the time, finally getting the freedom to make your own decisions is very liberating.
I feel so less alone now than when I was married to a narcissist . I prefer my soltitude and newfound peace ❤ I can only take people in small doses 😉
I am 64. And I love spending time by myself. I look forward to the days where there’s nothing on my calendar and I can just relax and spend time doing what I want to do such as my art projects, gardening, and reading, and snoozing. I feel myself pulling away from social events and people who want to be my friend that I really don’t share anything in common with. I now just have a few close friends that I call my soul sisters. I am not interested in spending time with people who do not share my beliefs or who are not on my path. I’ve never been happier.
Dittos! I don't have time for people who don't share my values. They're not friends, just acquaintances and I don't enjoy their company. I agree - soul sisters are enough!
I’m 67 and came from a very dysfunctional home. I craved friends and what I thought normality. Just made me a target for a doormat! My kindness was abused when I couldn’t say no. Not sure when I was done with that stage in my life! Menopause ? It’s liberating! Married to a wonderful man for almost 50 yrs and we have two adult kids we’re very close to and one grandson. They are all the company I need!
I am 63. For the last several years I have been sad and depressed that my adult children don't come for the holidays anymore. They have prioritized their own families, in-laws and holiday vacations. This year, I am elated! I sent them their Christmas cards in the mail and am enjoying the holiday season in peace and quiet. I roasted a turkey for Thanksgiving and put up my Christmas tree just for ME! I do believe it's a process though.
@@Mindy-r2s Yes you are loved
@@Mindy-r2s I’m 63 and have the same situation. My kids don’t understand the importance of extended family . I thought I raised them to understand that but I guess I didn’t but that’s on them. I lived it and spoke of it a lot. I have surrendered that values are different now and that doesn’t mean I have to be right. It is just such a foreign concept and unexpected. Now…to find me and what I love. I decorated my home beautifully for Christmas. No one has seen it but I have so enjoyed it.
Do they invite you?
@@Mindy-r2s yes I’m invited to most events but not all.
Excellent! It is definitely all about how you see it.😊
I'm tired of accommodating other people's desires,of tolerating the unreasonable/difficult ones, of worrying about what others think of me, of being bullied/scorned/used, of being told what to do all the time, and the list goes on.
Hi! First let me say, I’m 64 and am so happy I found your videos. Your topics have been exactly what’s been on my mind. You’ve been very helpful. Your title here has made me laugh because a few years ago, I googled, “I’m 61 and I don’t like being around anyone anymore”. I laughed so hard when the answer was, “This is the natural progression of aging”.
Lol, I'm sitting here laughing!
I totally agree with your philosophy!!😊
Me too
Your videos put everything into perspective. Makes me feel better knowing this is a normal process.
I am so glad I found your channel! I think you're right on point with everything you said about aging and how we spend our time. I think back to when I was younger and how much time I used to waste on people chasing after relationships that were really nonexistent. This included family members, too. My mother was also narcissistic. It was her way of surviving a traumatic life when she was younger, so I understand why she was the way she was, but it doesn't negate the damage it did to those around her. She died three and a half years ago, and I found that I don't miss her. I miss her love but not her mental illness and controlling nature. Since she passed, i really have blossomed. I have really grown spiritually and emotionally, and I'm finally comfortable being my authentic self without fear of ridicule or judgment from her.
I also agree with you about wanting to spend more time alone and not having many friends. What I realized was that the people I thought were my friends when I was younger weren't. I have one true friend now, and she means the world to me. I am rich.
As for living alone, there's nothing wrong with it in my opinion. I was 47 when I met my husband and married him when I was 49. I never felt like I needed a man to complete me, but I will say that my husband adds to my abundance, and i'm thankful.
I agree with you also about being selective who you spend your time with. I get more excited about being at home on the couch with a hot cup of tea watching t v with Mike than anything else. I found that the fewer of the years I have in front of me, the more selective I am with whom I spend my time. Time is a valuable commodity that can never be reaobtained.
I've also removed toxic people from my life. Most of those people were family that either died or I just decided to cut ties with. The hardest thing I had to realize in this lifetime is that just because you are born into this family, it does not mean you belong to this family. I have had many soul connections with people not related to me, and the relationships with them ran deeper than anything I had with family members.
I've subscribed to your channel and will continue watching your videos. I would love a tour of your home if you wouldn't mind. I really like your decorating style.
Absolutely love this! Thank you for sharing. There may be a home tour in the future.
Thank you Holly for your beautiful Light and incredible soul. At age 75 I live alone . I have lived a life in and out of relationships trying my best to be the person that would fit into the mold of each relationship I was in. I have learned to love living alone now and have been single for nearly 7 years and enjoying it ! Now at my age I find it so much better and easier to actually be totally myself doing what I want as opposed to doing things that have the approval of a partner. Freedom and independence is way more important to me than having to focus energy on another individual and attempting to make their lives fit into my own vision for myself. I totally agree with your philosophy as it is my own now. Bless you always.
Thank you so much for sharing!
Minute 7:00 you described me 😆 but my dad was able to spot a not so good friend a mile away and now I know what he was talking about.
Im glad i found this , im 58 and bored with meeting with freinds for coffee , talkin about the same thing over and over , i love being at home with my hubbie and dog , my parents are gone and i have no kids , im happy though , i hate going to other peoples houses , i clock watch until i can go home , hate small talk !!!! I used to be a party animal !!!! 😂
I agree with you. I live alone and don’t feel lonely. Grateful to be alive experiencing this journey called life.
Yes I So Relate! I’m 63 and my Solitude Is A Gift To Myself! Living Alone Is A Super Power! Thank You For Sharing! ❤
I absolutely adore being home! I’ve raised four boys and I’m tired. I was raised by two narcissists.. walking on eggshells and pleasing people was my life. I’m over it!! I love my own company. I feel like my nervous system is healing during my quiet times alone.
Funny, I was just thinking about this last night! I realized that I was content and grateful to live alone. Im 64 and was divorced 16 years ago. Went crazy, had to live in group homes to survive, was homeless at 1 point. However, I recovered in 2018 and live with my cat, Burt, in a nice, safe apartment . Yes, there are some ups and downs but I pray to never live with strangers and narcissists again. I am grateful for my solitary freedom.
Thank you so much for sharing.
Yes, yes, yes! Just the other day I told my daughter-in-law I am just not into large gatherings anymore. Family is fine but when it includes friends of friends, of friends, I’m out. It was a gentle nudge so she’ll remember that as I decline party gatherings. I’ve been alone since 2006, and I am for the most part very happy with it. What I miss most often is good intellectual conversation with others on a broad range of topics. It just doesn’t happen in our me, me, me society. There are many things to learn from ourselves if we just take the time and be alone with ourselves. Thanks for a great video. 🌲
I don't feel lonely, I just enjoy my own company more than ever. I am so content ❤
I am 75 and really on my own since 3 years.. it was hard in the beginning. I felt
Forgotten...but now for the first time i went shopping and bought things for me...i did not have one thought over what the others that might come visit me would like!!! I am so happy...
I have 2 ponys, 2 chickens and a cat and that is enough..
I have some good friends and thats a tressure...
I am starting to become me again and am happy...
That's wonderful, thank you for sharing
Yes. I do find myself enjoying time alone as I get older. I live alone also and don’t need to be with people everyday like I used to.
Thank you for bringing this topic to life. I feel that solitude (or even isolation) heals me and brings me peace. Somehow, people are ok in small doses for me... then I need to retrieve into my space with books, silence, quiet surroundings, writing and painting, listening to birds and gentle breeze in the presence of trees... and my dog... that is where I find true joyful existence... I know people who might just lose their mind living my life, but my inner monk thrives there. And I am nowhere near 60 yet 😊
I've been divorced for over 10 years, and I do not feel lonely. I feel relieved. He was planning a wedding during the divorce.
Those who choose solutide no longer feel the need to live up to anyone else's standards. They are comfortable in their own skin, and they appreciate life's simplicity. Small talk is exhausting. I'm 48.
Yes, yes, yes. I TOTALLY agree with everything you are sharing. Peopling is not top on my list anymore if it's lacking substance.
I’m only 40 and feel the strong need to isolate. I don’t know if it’s because of past trauma or the fact that I can’t tolerate people’s bs anymore. Spending time outdoors gardening really does wonders for the soul.
I just discovered your channel,(happy new subscriber) 🥰this video is so me.. I am 63, single (happily)...I live alone and LOVE it, after divorce, and a second failed relationship of 7 years, I knew i was done.. this was 15years ago. 2 grown sons, they are my life..I have a couple of close friends... Solitude for me,, is exacly how u described it girl!!! 💜
I think we get to a point where we feel comfortable with ourselves and we don’t need to be around people.
I live with family but absolutely love solitude! I love it when everyone goes off to school and work! I rarely socialize and I’m fine with that. 72 years old and enjoying my peace!
Im 60 yr old guy been through all that ,now im single and live alone ,own my house outright, carry little debt and love my solitude and don't mind it at all ,I suffer 0 depression I still have alot of friends and family around not far away, but I love chilling at home doing outside projects and improvements on my property ,that's where I get my high from ,I quit drinking and smoking years ago ,id take a woman like you though your a beauty ❤.
I was born profoundly deaf. Most deaf folks like Helen Keller lost their hearing or sight or both in their toddler years and it makes a difference. I love my solitude years after going into my 60's. I loved my college years and co-workers for years! Now I'm 67 and enjoying myself with reading and watching movies on my tablet.
My husband passed away 3 years ago. He was a narcissist. I moved to a completely new community. I'm delighted to have my own house that is just mine. I have a tiny circle of friends that I see infrequently. And I absolutely love doing exactly what I want to do and when I want to do it. I don't feel lonely. In the last few years of my working life I really disliked the amount of time I was giving away to other people, and they were people who I would not otherwise have chosen to spend time with. I'm delighted to be retired and on my own.
It sounds like you are thriving in your new life. Thank you so much for sharing.
I love being alone but I also love hanging out with my family; we play games, etc…I feel very depressed when alone too long and will do things that are unhealthy like watch You Tube too much or eat unhealthy. I wish I had more friends that were more like me; my friends are very different, so I have to really feel like hanging out with them. I think we all need other humans.
So glad to hear you say this. I am never lonely, there's no need to be lonely!
I realized during the ridiculous LOCK DOWN that it didn’t change my life at all. I was good with it, Other than the stupid masking which we all know was useless, but the point is even that isolating business didn’t really bother me as I thought it might. ( not regarding people who suffered) talking only about being away from society. It was quite the eye opener for so many reasons.
Same here.
Former hard core extrovert here. Love my me time! I feel lonely sometimes around people with whom I don’t relate.
When my 2nd ex moved out of my house, I remember the ocean of peace that I was able to dive into when I came home for the first time to an empty house. I breathed so deeply! It was and still is fantastic!!!
Yes! It's been 45 years since my divorce and I STILL awake many mornings first thought I'm soooooo happy that I'm not married! Best feeling EVER!!!!
I have been divorced since 2000. I love being on my own. I am very much of an introvert so I can go days without talking to anybody. I retired a couple of years ago. I am a very complete person, happy, contented, and my life is very rich. I do have Several really good friends. I don’t care about having lots and lots of people that I consider friends they’re more of acquaintances. Good for you. I think it’s very important to learn to know yourself and like yourself. I enjoy spending time with me.!!
I absolutely LOVE my solitude. I don’t think I want to ever live with anyone else.
Same. 🙏
Plus you decide to go here or there and you don't have anybody say why are you going there for
The thought of living with another person makes me shudder ! 😅
I am married yet each of us have our own spaces. He likes to watch his old westerns and I like to read and watch decorating videos. So we each have our rooms yet met up when we want companionship. It works for us. ❤
I’m 58 and living apart from my spouse due to his being in sober living for an indefinite period of time. I’ve lived alone for a year and off and on for several years before that due to our separation because of his alcoholism. What I’ve discovered is that I enjoy my solitude and have found such peace and joy in it. I’m not lonely. I find I have time to do things I enjoy like reading, art, learning and researching, etc. I work still and go out with friends occasionally, but if I have a preference, I enjoy my solitude! 😂
Amen sister!
I love my solitude, people get uncomfortable when you choose a different path no matter what it is. For some reason it threatens them. If you are different they don’t like it.
Stay unique we need more unicorns in the world.
I completly stopped dating about age 45. I choose being single. I have family and friends but i realized that i was more unhappy in a relationship than being on my own. Divorce happened and i didnt have that Christ centered marriage i should've had so it fell apart. I have the Lord in my heart and get peace from that. Have my fur baby that comforts me too.
So much so, it's like your verbalizing exactly how I feel
I have been on my own for years & love it. I call it. 90-10 world, about 10% of the time I think it would be nice to have someone around. But , 90% of the time I am perfectly happy living a slow life. Excessive social interactions drain me. Overly extroverts drain me, can take days to recover 🤣
A handyman kept in a cupboard would be very useful though 😅
I've always been happy on my own or just with a few close family. My mom said even as a little child she would invite playmates round but I was always happier amusing myself! I do clearly remember enjoying playing on my own with my dolls and teddies and making up stories about them. I can't stand making small talk - socialising with people I don't know that well is my worst nightmare - it's totally draining I find.
Reading all the other comments and feeling like I'm in good company! I work FT in quite a demanding job so when I come home I want totally and complete silence and solitude. What use to be punishment for me, is now reward. Imagine the joy now of being grounded. 😁
I found going on a quiet retreat in 30's was hard, I bet at 65, it wouldn't be. The quiet would be fine. My sister is alone and in an condo she can manage and had a guy friend for a year or two, but found it sufficating at times. She realized about 20 years divorced, she didn't want to be cooking for him or having to always compromise, she liked outings but didn't want to live with him. She likes to watch what she wants to watch, listen to her type of music, loves to read and visit her grandkids. Nothing wrong with it if you love it.
Absolutely! I relish my solitude. I have even named my home Sweet Solitude Retreat. However, this didn’t start in my 60s. I have always been an introvert.
Seems like many discovered their introversion during COVID, along with not liking to dress appropriately in public and just becoming lazier in general. Introversion and narcissism also became diluted in their true meaning now being applied indiscriminately.
Ive never sought social interaction and now i'm older (74), I've stopped being guilt-tripped about it. I occasionally go to functions where there is something to be gained eg information or entertainment. Im polite and responsive to people who speak to me, but i dont hang around just to socialize. I have always been shy, but on top of that i think its that i dont expect to get any pleasure or satisfaction from interation with others. If course, sometimes i do, but the odds are against it. Thats just the way i am, but if others dont approve, that's too bad.
I’m 56 and I crave real connections, not small talk. I don’t need anyone to complete me or make me happy, but I’d love to share my happiness with special people. Great video ❤
I'm 64, can't find a vegan values community in my age group
You look terrific for your age! Happy Birthday 🎈🎉🎁. I’m definitely lonely. At first I thought it was nice being alone but that wore off pretty fast. I miss having a sex life. Cuddling, kissing, touching each other. Have a nice evening. 😊
That expression, "complete me" leaves me cold. No one should be completing you. You should complete yourself!
@@Luanavit22 Love is out there .I think two completes make a whole.Iam 76 and re married at 74.The timing must be right.
@@davidarmitage9041 Y husband is also an intimate man.That keeps us going.Keep your options open.
Solitude is my autonomy. My life is 90% solitude and 10% loneliness. To ward off loneliness I change my routine; take a trip; get together with friends. Mix it up. My wife passed from cancer 6 years,ago. I retired, downsized, sold the house and moved to a place accessible but not too close to my adult children. I have emancipated myself from negative people and influences in my life but it has taken a period of sustained introspection. Get off social media. Bring your circle of loved ones close. Practice kindness in all that you do. Be well. I hope you find spiritual renewal, mental and physical health through an attitude of gratitude. Godspeed in your journey.
Thank you so much for sharing some of your story!
I have always been "the lone ranger" - more or less. Now in my old age its hard to tell the difference - is it really that I "enjoy being alone" or that I just don't want all the drama and hard work it takes to have other people around me all of the time.
When I was a boy I often would go off alone and find a place to lie on the ground or up in a tree and just watch the world around me...sky, clouds, birds, sounds...sometimes I would walk the mile down to the local theater and watch a movie alone...
Other people around are like a weight on my head sometimes. If thrown into a social environment I am quite good at "small talk" - but can't wait to get back home and alone again.
I’m 52 and adore my solitude …. Driving … having one drink by a hotel bar .. staying alone in a hotel room …. Having dinner alone … cooking for hours alone … great times
❤
I am 61. Ha e 4 children and grandbaby number 5 on the way. I work and am out of the house more than I want to be. All I think about is when I can be home. I feel grounded and safe and it’s quiet and calm. I am married and solitude is important for both of us. We find time each day to be able to have those solitude times. Makes a big difference. Thanks for sharing
I am 47 and I have always craved solitude. It seldom, if ever, occurs to me to reach out to anyone. I am quite happy alone, and after back to back relationships with abusive narcissists, being alone feels like winning the lottery.
I am 64 and this is so me! After a lifetime of people pleasing, I just don't have loads of social energy left. Everyone seems to want me around when they need something from me, and only then. It is draining. And I am so done. I love solitude and peace.
I love your videos. So with you on “small talk.” One of the reasons I enjoy you so much is that you are the anti-Small talk.
Oh my, you are speaking to ME! Although I am married (happily), I find myself needing what I call "alone time" and if I don't get it, I can become very edgy. My husband is retired, like me, and goes to Europe twice a year for two weeks to visit a step son. I treasure those two weeks to have for myself! I also fantasize about living in a little two bedroom condo in some European country BY MYSELF. I have gotten past the guilt of this! I love your channel!
Thank you!
I can very much relate. Since turning 60, I feel like’ve become somewhat antisocial and was feeling I was alone in this. It’s so validating to hear that others feel similarly.
I am sitting in the desert right now ALONE, no neighbors...I live in a Van and travel the country. I have my dog, shes all I need. I love this life and purposefully seek out places to stay away from people. I can see the night sky with no light interruptions, stunningly gorgeous. Living in a town or city now I find it rapes my senses. We were designed to use all our senses but most lifestyles destroy them. My hearing and eyesight have improved. My mental and physical health have improved. Minimalism has me intouch with myself. No one better to be with than myself. #fearless #fiercewomen #ascension #mentalhealth
That sounds amazing! I wish you could share a pic!
This lifestyle sounds very tempting.
Wow, that sounds great and you've inspired me to try it out. Pure night sky with no sound would be great. I live in a City, but do my best to navigate around stress and people, and find the pools of tranquility where I can. Meditation and trying for presence can help a lot too.
I’m 60 and I love living alone! I am never bored or lonely!