I was so sad to see Rory becoming less and less supportive of the girls around her as she got older. She wasn’t a good friend to Lane most of the time and we all know Lane needed an actual best friend the most.
@@Sophnmuffin no she wasn't 😂 they were study buddies. But I do think it's bizarre that people hate on Rory so much, as if she's supposed to be this perfect character lol. I love her and Lane's friendship, they can mess up but will recognize when they do and work on changing their behavior.
I think they’re more “cool girl” than anything else. The “I eat everything and stay a size 2” “I’m beautiful and feminine effortlessly unlike the other girls who try too hard” “guys like me more because I’m low maintenance” kind of cool girl.
exactly this is just the "chill girl" in the way they dont care either way and aren't actually trying to be their own person to blend in with the "other girls" in a sense
Absolutely. They're not as sexy or sporty as other cool girls, but that's definitely what the writers were going for. The effortlessly beautiful low maintenance intelligent girls. I don't think the writers were necessarily thinking about how much of a guy's fantasy that is.
The way Lindsay is treated is disgusting. She wants to get married and have kids and cook and clean. That's perfectly fine as long as it's her choice and she has a partner who agrees. Also, Michelle Branch and Matchbox Twenty have some pretty good music. I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift or Arianna Grande, but they are talented and I don't think someone is wrong for liking their music.
I agree, I used to be a bit of a music snob for a phase, but as I get older I'm like, wait, that is so rude, people like what they like and my music taste is prob so cringe to other people, lmao. I remember watching this clip in high school though thinking jess was such a jerk! I was like Michelle Branch is sooooooo good, c'mon!! There is a scene where Dean's sister is playing Avril Lavigne and Rory says "We need to get her some Ramones" and I'm like yes, love them too, but Avril is also the MOMENT.
They literally never said otherwise. Not once is her dream diminished. The realities of being dependent on your husband economically in a social and legal system that exploits domestic labour by not recognizing it as work and leave women vulnerable to abuse and exploitation is what is scary to most women about that life, Lindsey is a fairytale version of the housewife dream, she has a support networth and didn't have children with the man she married at 19, who verbally disrespects her and cheats on her. The liberal feminist view that theres a push against women who dream of this life is nothing but propaganda, the scorn isn't towards having kids or cooking, the scorn is towards a system in which these women exist as indentured servants. Western women are so delusional when it comes to domestic works place in society.
Thanks, I couldnt pinpoint what made me uncomfortable about the two of them. Like it starts as simple jabs but they can get so casually judgy towards others
That scene you showed of Rory saying “what does Lindsay do all day? Why doesn’t she get a job?” Was quite ripe. I don’t think Rory had ever had a job yet either. She was in college, but she hadn’t had a job. Later on, she can’t keep a job.
But this was a common adage of the time period (the 90s) when it was the norm to raise kids on McDonalds, TV and ADD medication. Parents like that couldn't possibly understand the time and energy that goes into making all your meals from scratch, spending quality time with your children and spouse, maybe garden and raise backyard chickens, etc. so instead they mocked people like that. Now it's known as the crunchy mom movement and more accepted .
being in college is equivalent to having a job though imo. As someone who studies law I can guarantee you it's at least as stressful a 9/5 job, maybe even more, bc you don't just need to work, but you need to get the results ppl expect and you can never really rest I think Rory meant this more in a kind of "how does she spend her time all day?" way and not in a "how does she contribute to the economy" way
It’s almost like Lorelai and Rory make you feel jealous of their “specialness” but you can’t even blame them or get angry at them because they are not actually “pick me’s”
Honestly, I never thought they were special, I thought they were likeable and relatable. I wouldn't say the show tried to porttay them as special. The whole point is that they weren't. Rory was an average girl who has good grades and wanted to go to Harvard, Loralei is a single mother whose conservative parents abandoned because she got pregnant at a young age. I really never saw any specialness except that which comes with being relatable 😊
@@samf.s.7731 tbh I disagree. Rory is unbelievably beautiful (imo) extremely smart, likeable and gets good looking guys easily, even ones who are super rich, also she's supported by her mega rich grandparents. She is portrayed as special, imo.
@@loosilu yeah like the point of the show to me was to show how if you tell and treat someone like they're special constantly it's gonna lead to their downfall when they face real struggle in life because they've never had to overcome it before, that's why Rory becomes super entitled in the 2016 follow up
@@R_S747 I think you just nailed it. I think that's exactly Rory's trajectory. And she's preying on men who belong to someone else, like she's entitled o them.
i think rory and lorelai are very much what the "i'm not like other girls" trend meant. once everyone replaced this trend with the "pick me girl" concept, the meaning of it really became distorted for me. not everything the "i'm not like other girls" girls do is to get male atention, but it really is to set them apart from other girls and get more oportunities and feel superior, and that's what rory and lorelai would do in my opinion. they were just arrogant, just like richard and emily and all the other gilmores.
While I agree with your take, Emily Gilmore is not exactly a “traditional housewife”, since she literally has maids - more like a typical rich wife who actually gets along with her husband for the most part and is not a trophy wife
Emily was authentic. And she wasn't ashamed of her traditional ways. She was toxic in many many ways but at least she took responsibility about who she was .
@beverlymarsh6860 I wouldn't say she was always that self-aware. But I agree, for the most part, she viewed her role as important and put her all into it. (I refer to Emily as a "corporate wife," which is how Lorelai referred to her after Jason canceled the insurance company launch party Emily planned. She always saw it as her job to keep the family well-connected and bolster her husband's career.)
She was traditional in the sense that she was always taking care of Richard planning the events for the DAR any of Richard's business meetings/events I'm sure Emily took the liberty of planning even if she paid for catering instead of cooking herself, she pretty much designed the interior of the house from everything to the chairs like she got at mrs. Kim's antiques to the glass apples that she pointed out to Richard that were on the dining room table. She was traditional for a wife who was raised from Rich upbringing where maids and personal chefs are the norm.
I feel like she does fill the most basic housewife expectations: managing the house. Even when society was as smack in the middle of the mid-century nuclear family model, wealth impacted what “managing” looked like, but it was the common denominator
in the episode when they tell us rory is valedictorian and paris finds out she tells rory that she’s ok “bc she looked into and many valedictorians ended up amounting to nothing” (not exact but you know). the foreshadowing lol!
"she was ruined" um... that's manosphere speak lmao. it sure is the reason she became maladapted and couldn't deal with criticism or hard work but "ruined" is a silly term, nobody is "ruined" due to their flaws
@@UnBesoDeCristal We are talking about a fictional character after all, I'm sure you're familiar how many thought the writers "ruined" Rory on the 2016 return of the show.
@@rachelhernandez7794and talk about moral ethics she didnt bat an eye at sleeping with a married man just because at some point she dated him, check the entitlement and lack of awareness, this is what happens when you spend the whole time inflating a kids ego by the time the bubble pops and reality hits, the end result is a person that has no sense of whats right or wrong, because all their childhood they heard "how special they are" "how amazing and absolutely wonderful they are" so naturally they think the rules of morality dont apply to them because of how much more SPECIAL than the rest of the poor shmucks they are, so who would ever deny them anything they desire since its their God given right to be the exception to any rule because of how wonderful they are🙄😮💨
it's also worth mentioning how rory and lorelai could eat whatever they wanted and however much they wanted, and since they're traditionally attractive women, it's quirky and even lustworthy or enticing to the men. women who don't fall under what society deems an acceptable or healthy "look" would be ridiculed. thats another pick me trope that rings strong in this show
Yessss I was rolling my eyes so hard at them bringing up how much food they eat and how they eat junk. I have eyes, I can see those two women. They are not eating that crap
@@GoddesssofMind they do. that's not what i'm saying. i'm saying when skinny people do it it's commonly seen as okay, in this show it's considered funny and endearing. when other people do it they're shamed for being unhealthy.
Reminds me of that one line in Little Women where Meg says her dreams aren't any less important than Jo's just because she wants to settle down and start a family. A woman's choice and opinion shouldn't be put down regardless of how different or similar they are to other women.
Yes! There's this scene in the show, where Lorelai tells Rory to put on some makeup before going to bed, because some girls from her high school are going to wake her up as a surprise for a secret club meeting at midnight. Eventually, when they do wake her up, she's looking flawless and all of the other new girls who have been woken up as well look how a normal person would wake up, Paris, had cream on her face, etc. Which I guess was to put Rory's enemy down and make her look good.
@francescajx yes and also when Paris asked her, "do you always look like this, after waking up?" Because she got even more insecure after seeing her, to which she replied, yes
Shane was treated awful too. Lorelei called her a freak and Jess was awful to her. All she did was date Jess and I guess because she was sexually active, she was constantly hated on.
Even Rory was like that to her like when Shane was on the phone at the salon. Like just because you like her boyfriend and Shane wasn’t necessarily nice to Rory (because she started it) doesn’t give you the right to hate on women. That’s when I started not to like Rory that much bc she was attacking Shane for no reason which goes against what she started out as on the show
fr like when lorelai makes fun of luke for reggae music, hep alien calls groups like fleetwood mac “guilty pleasures”, jess makes fun of lindsay’s fav artists, and tbh a lot of other times. they’re honestly rly elitist in gg. a lot of micro aggressions too in general.
I think there was an episode where I think Lorelei made a slight against Linkin Park and I was like “Woah slow your roll there, ma’am, we’re not doing that” cuz I love LP
I do think that Rachel - one of Luke’s other love interests - was almost more of a NLOG in her depiction than Lorelei. She was “cool,” loved travel and adventure and even looked great right after a super long flight.
Yup not that she was intentionally trying to be not like other girls, she was just cool but it shows that Lorelais real competition were other women like that in contrast to Nicole. Luke’s preference has always been quirky unconventional women ie anna nardini, Rachel and lorelai - not Nicole which was made obvious to us. The show set Nicole up just like Lindsay and sherry- “basic” women who are no real competition to the Gilmore girls.
To add on to that I noticed that the writers made Lorelei only have friends or like other girls who were "unconventionally unattraktive". A huge reason why Lorelai was so insecure around Luke's ex was because she was conventionally beautiful and she saw her like competition.
@joelleweetjewel9948 Yep, I'm confused over that as well, which is why I avoid to use terms like this too broadly to characterize women, since it just doesn't sit right to me. Seems to me like "NLOG" and "pick me girl" have deviated too much from their original meanings, as there's nothing wrong with girls who have unusual hobbies or tastes, or who prefer more traditionally "masculine" things over feminine or don't wear make up. Female personal expression shouldn't be limited to just accept the norms and resigne to just be like everybody else instead of your individual self, since that would be regressive in a lot of ways. Now, if the Rachel character was constantly comparing herself to another women and painting herself in a better light for doing things in a "superior" way just because she enjoys odd or tomboyish things, yes that's a NLOG. If she does it for male validation, yes that's a pick me. But if that's not present on her character, (I don't remember the character that well to say if that's the case or not) then why label her like that.
I just think of them as the ultimate girly-girl fantasy. They can eat whatever they want and still be thin. Lorelai loves her job, has a beautiful house, is constantly getting compliments from everyone, and has nearly perfect relationship with her daughter. Rory (at least in the TV show) gets everything she wants, always comes out on top, is loved by nearly everyone, and has gorgeous boys fighting over her all the time. They really don't seem to care what other people think. They don't have to be pick me girls, because men fall all over themselves to date them.
Yeah as much of a GG defender that I am, I’ll freely admit the show is basically just a fantasy come true, mostly lol It’s very unrealistic and both characters are pretty spoilt. I do respect Lorelei for always putting her daughter first. I realise that that’s part of the fantasy. But still. Through all her faults, she did ultimately accept full responsibility as a parent and mother.
@@someonerandom8552 there's nothing wrong with a show being a fantasy. It's nice to escape reality sometimes and it's much more intelligent than most sitcoms.
@@doesitmatterwhoiam8838true. Why I would like to see a depressing reflection of my imperfect life I enjoy so much watching Gilmore girls ❤ and the outfits are always on point.
I think the show usually strikes a balance between an almost fairytale escapism and real, flawed characters. Amy Sherman-Palladino has discussed how (a) she doesn't care about "the moral of the story" and (b) she wanted to create an ideal "snow globe world" in Stars Hollow. In order to have a good drama, you need flaws and difficulties. But the escapism is clear from the jump: (1) the girls eat junk food and never gain weight or have breakouts, (2) they can afford restaurants, shopping sprees, and an idyllic country home on a single mom budget, (3) the whole town loves them and men fall at their feet, (4) they almost always have something witty to say, (5) they have seemingly boundless energy for every activity under the sun. The only problems introduced are for story purposes. Otherwise, they are Wonderwoman. Or Electrawoman and Dynagirl. Or any other fictional superheroes. We're supposed to watch these women who can do basically anything, and who live in this idyllic world, and escape the daily pressures of our lives for a while. When they screw up, or when an outside pressure is introduced for story purposes, it makes for good drama, but it can be hard to balance with the superhero aspect. I think we're just noticing that balancing act more in hindsight.
That’s fair. It almost feels like because they’re women we’re more critical of them. Not saying that’s the case, just putting that out there. But it doesn’t have to be super literal, nor does it need to be super idyllic. It was a quirky drama involving flawed characters but had a fantasy element at the centre. That’s fine too
@someonerandom8552 I completely believe that, in general, people are more critical of flawed women. And it's hard because their flaws deserve criticism, but in similar cases with men, it's not looked on so critically.
@@Aelffwynn Amen! I have no issues with people criticising women for their actions or flaws. That’s valid. But it can become a bit hard to discern between good faith criticisms (which again I have no issue with) and just being overly judgemental because women are harshly evaluated. I’m not saying men don’t also have harsh standards they feel obligated to uphold, obviously. Just that society can be very unforgiving and the standards are different. I don’t want to make it seem like a contest, of course. Feel like I need to make that super clear, lest people jump on me lol
This is so well put! I haven't watched the show in years and I don't remember it super well, but it definitely smacks of escapism and fantasy looking back. Everything you said, the eating junk food but still being healthy, the endless men, all of it.
I feel like race plays alot into it as well. Like Lane is so unique and to me more of a "not like other girls" person than rory - but she's not as glorified by every character like rory. it's like when you are a girl of color no matter how "unique" or "interesting" you are you present poc first and tend to be ignored.
I’ve always felt like Lane got looked over. Lane did fun things and had a band. She was cerebral but it wasn’t her identity. For Lane’s character to go the way it did, imo, was unfair. Her life should have ended up more interesting…no shade. I feel like the writers for the reboot really overlooked a possible storyline with Lane beginning to see or reach some success with the band while Rory struggled to find her purpose. After all, Rory was the special one who went to special schools and knew special people right? This could have been an amazing conflict to force her to realize that despite everything she had a level of arrogance. She low key thought that she was better. Better than even her bestie.
@@chamab.6800 I agree! She definitely deserved an extended storyline - it would've been great to see Rory realize Lane's success and that she wasn't better than her. I feel like even in the earlier seasons lane was not written into certain episodes. It would've been cool to see Lane grow into herself because she was such an interesting character!
@Mary-Cate You can't say that if Jane was white, it'd be the same. If she was white, she'd threaten the "superiority" built into Rory and her mother. They are, evidently, the only desirable females in town. The only ones who "aren't like the others". The OPs comment is right on. When you know, you know.
I still enjoy it and there are great things we can take away from the show, but you’re right it hits different from an older perspective. To a big extent it’s a great reflection of the times it was made in and how much we’ve grown as a society in understanding some problematic elements of the show.
@@Silverscreenfreak very much agree!! my mom was a single parent, and though i had older brothers too, my mom & i were as tight as them on the show, so the show meant a lot to us and we bonded over it. but seeing clips of it grown up sometimes is just eek to me. but it still reminds me of my late mother so i will always love it even when it makes me cringe lol.
I was at a prenatal appointment and my Dr asked if I worked and I said no I’m a SAHM. And she said that’s a very hard job. My in-laws always mock me and ask when I’ll get a real job so it was refreshing to be validated by another woman.
You're so lucky! I wish I could be a SAHM one day but I have no kids rn and unfortunately my in laws also are the type to where the woman should be working too. My mom was a SAHM and I feel so grateful, I'm sure your kids will really appreciate it.
I always thought it was a little weird how they were like local celebrities and put on a pedestal while at the same time they were supposed to be so quirky and against the grain. I mean the show is just such a fantasy but I mean that's tv for you.
Also it’s not like they have been living there forever, they only moved there pretty recently according to the show, and they seem like very average people? Maybe pretty girls, but not very special..
Yeah I feel like irl them consistently being a little bit annoying because they think they can get away with it (bc they’re pretty and thin) would make them low key hated by everyone in a small town and there would be hella gossip about them
Let's not forget that one scene with professor Fleming and Rory about Rory's grade where Rory calls the red head "fat" because of her thighs. She also blames Paris for the whole situation of the "affair" instead of getting upset at professor Fleming who is 60 mind you for dating an 18 year old girl (Paris). Which yes Paris was wrong for the affair but I wouldn't even call it an affair because it seems as tho Paris was groomed in that relationship.
That was normal female behaviour pre-2010s though. It may seem horrible to us now, but many women of that generation were raised to believe that having larger thighs and hips was ugly and bad. My Gen X mum still comments on other women's "thunder thighs".
This is why I love the fan theory that the tv show is based on the book Rory writes in the revival. And it's her romanticising her life and relationship with her mother.
The show really appealed to me because I wanted to be the special girl. In hindsight, I feel like Lindsay really got the short end of the stick, given how Dean and Rory slept together. I guess I should have stanned Lanie all along.
@@wolftownesque True instead he just told Rory not to go to the wedding, maybe if she did, Dean wouldn't have gone through with it and saved Lindsay a divorce and worse headache later, poor Lindsay deserved better, she seemed like a sweet girl, but because she's not RORY GILMORE, we're supposed to hate her? And root for Dean's infidelity?
I think they are pick me's in a very "girl boss" sense. They embrace feminity and their friendships but are very much in charge and don't accept other women expressing feminity along with "masculine" hobbies. I also think Lorelia specifically pushes away many traditional norms as a act of rebellion against her mother.
i think the Gilmore girls were critical of women who they felt were not being their authentic selves. Sherry having a baby because she felt she had to (ends up abandoning her). Emily following what was expected of her and being the perfect wife and wanting that life for her own daughter. Rory’s criticisms of Jess’ and Dean’s partners was rooted in jealousy. I also believe that Rory wasn’t being critical of Lane for being a cheerleader rather she felt that Lane wasn’t doing it for herself and had never expressed an interest like that; which is also why I love Lane’s response to her, saying she was just curious about what it would be like, and found that it was actually fun! I don’t think they’re pick-mes just extremely self centered 😂 and also unfortunately victims of the times.
Yup this is the vibe I got. When they saw women who were different it’s like they would judge because they felt they knew that the women weren’t being genuine. Like “who are you trying so hard for?” “You actually like overworking yourself and juggling all these things?” “You don’t want to do anything other than stay at home with children, really?” They were doubtful of women because those things were not THEIR idea of happiness. But that’s problematic too
Yep you’re so right. Like often I get why Lorelie wants to rebel against her mother but at the same time she often just acts like a brat. Rory just gets worse with every season imo like the characters are more developed which shows their flaws with each season but rory just keeps getting worse and feels so much entitlement that it makes me hate her. They just think they’re above everyone with their choices of music and food etc. They are more ‘judgemental girls’ than ‘pick me girls’.
Thank you for this. You hit the nail on the head. Women often perform femininity because they believe that's what's expected of them. A free thinking woman stays true to herself and doesn't perform for others.
I don't think Rory was an authentic person. She wanted to go to Harvard just because, just to feel superior, she knew nothing about the process of getting accepted, she didn't research about other college journalism programs, she just decided that Harvard was the best and because she's also the best, she will go there and end of story. She didn't accept to think about other careers choice, to try other things and see what she really likes, she was 5 when she decided to be like Christiane Amanpour and that's it, no more thinking is need it. Rory only goal was to prove how incredible superior she was.
I think what makes Gilmore Girls a great show is that you can find things to discuss even so many years after it ended. It’s a show that makes you think, always. As for the pick me energy, I think Lorelai and Rory are definitely people who look down on certain women, especially traditional women. I don’t think the show is framing the Gilmore Girls as right, they sort of just show all women on the spectrum.
I agree with some people on here about Lindsay, I felt like she was treated so terribly as a character and Rory is really quite the villain in that scenario. I disagree when it comes to Sherri or day Rachel. I think Lorelai is a bit more lenient and upfront when it comes to supporting women and sort of throws in the towel without compromising who she is as a feminist. She realizes it's just complicated with Rachel and Sherri and we see her as a bit insecure around powerful women like that. I think Lorelai sees Rachel and Sherri and views them as these perfect women who have it all. Rachel and Sherri really are the cool girls and I feel like Lor sorta wishes she was cool in that way and just accepts that she is cool in her own way, but doesn't tear them down. She is very much in awe of those two women when she discovers them, but I enjoy that she doesn't go out of her way to be mean to them even if there is jealousy there. I think the jealousy is that they have or have had the men she wants to be with. Rory is a bit more petulant and it is not a good quality. I have to say. But hey, I think we are seeing that the ladies aren't perfect and step in the shit quite often, but hey, that's real. This essay is fantastic btw!! Great editing and just really enjoyable!
I totally agree! Even though, through Rory's lens, she's justified in sleeping with Dean, Lorelai knows it's wrong and calls her out. Lorelai even kind of admires Dean's marriage (in a convo with Sookie) when Rory's not around. She defends Rory against Lindsay's mother, because she's not going to let anyone tear into her daughter in public like that. But she doesn't defend her actions. (She even says something to the effect of, "I know Rory was wrong, but don't do this.) There's a reason we keep returning to this series, and it's not because the characters are perfect angels. We like flawed characters. They're interesting and real.
💯, Lorelai seemed to be more envious of the fact that they weren’t teen moms and really had nothing keeping them from achieving their goals. I think she actually had a lot in common with them, because despite having had a daughter so young, she was accomplishing so many things. And the older I get the more I believe people don’t start seeing their financial lives improving until their 30s when their careers are more settled 😅
I felt free when I heard that Amy Sherman-Palladino didn't care about Gilmore Girls being a show with a message. However, I do enjoy video essays about it, because it doesn't hurt to reflect about the content we consume.
OMG you just put in words the complicated feelings I had towards the show for a while. I'm so relief to watch some good criticism on this. I always had this feeeling that they where so special, so different, things worked in a diffent way that it worked for other women on the show, and why was that? are they reallly that good? should we be like them so life would be nice for us? It's almost like a feminism only for feminists, other girls are just benighted and don't deserve better.
Feminism is supposed to be for everyone to make their own choices (it's even for men, because if more women can choose to work, more men can choose to stay home if they want. It's more complex than that, but there's the gist.) And Rory and Lorelai pay lip service to that. But at the end of the day, they aren't always supportive of other women's goals because they are flawed characters in a flawed world. For them, it mostly comes down to personal jealousy. Rory liked Lindsay until Lindsay started dating Dean. Lorelai got along incredibly well with Rachel, and they probably would have been friends if not for Luke. Sherri *is* high-strung and has issues, but she's perfectly nice, and Rory knows that. It's through Lorelai's lens of jealousy that we poke fun at her.
The way the ate so much junk food and never got sick, not to mention how unhealthy it was and how they never gained weight. I mean who can literally eat so much junk and not get sick and have so much energy? That has *always* bugged me...
@@loosilu Right?! Luke gave them free food before he got together with Lorelei and even after she cheated on him and they broke up! What’s up with that?
@@moonbatt Because they were that special! They were allowed to take anything they wanted from a dude who wasn't making a lot of money, because they deserved it.
I love love love Emily Gilmore. She is a feminist in her own way. I couldn’t stand Rory. I felt bad for Lindsay especially that she married Dean and Dean cheated on her with Rory and Rory didn’t GAF.
Emily, who was horrible to literally all the women in her life was a feminist???? She’s a tragic figure, sure….. I think even sympathetic. That is - I get where she’s coming from. But unless feminism suddenly means something different…..
@@bookNerd151 Emily was horrible to who? She was wonderful to Rory. With adult eyes I very much see her frustration with Lorelei, who looks like an entitled brat.
this is such an interesting take! i'm only part of the way through the show, but i think that i agree with you! honestly i think it was a of a product of its times (the early 2000s) and was pretty forward thinking, but still a little bit sexist, very early 2000s lol.
I’ll always remember how Rory wrote about that ballerina at the school paper. Rory commented on her body and the way she danced in such a horrible way and everyone around her supported it. It really showed me how other people view Rory to such a high standard and excuse her judgemental /mean behaviour, allowing her to never really take accountability
What makes GG so addictive is everyone in that world/universe was living their own life according to their own personality quirks. Even Lane found a way to be herself whilst under the thumb of her hyper controlling mother. Emily loved being a corporate wife. Never once did she seem like a victim. Once she marveled at the fact that Lorelai was a kayak while she was a canoe, but she didn't seem deeply affected by it. If anything bothered her it was the fact that Lorelai had to be coerced to spend time with her whereas Rory loved to hang out with her mother. Yeah, Lorelai and Rory judged other women (and men) based on their music preference. They did tend think they're better than people that were too mainstream. They weren't perfect, but if they were perfect, people would be complaining about that too. Oh, wait minute, yes, people do complain that Rory's too perfect.
I love Lindsay Lister so much. She deserves the entire world, and Arielle Kebbel is so cute. I hate that Lindsay was vilified for normal girlfriend/wife behavior like not trusting her partner’s ex, and also vilified for getting joy out of trying to please him, and fulfillment out of domestic work. Her absolute joy at getting the roast beef right, her cuteness in her Marilyn Monroe dress, when Dean literally was just cheating on her and has been verbally and emotionally abusing her for doing her best but not being Rory… it breaks my heart! I loved the little bread basket shaped like a duck, and I hope she kept it in the divorce. I just love Lindsay so much, I want to give her an enormous hug.
I think this is kind of missing that Emily's life is entirely built around being her husband's wife, living up to the standards of being with him, and in the final season she confronts that part of her life.
They had a superiory complex very simple. They thought they were everything and rarely owned up to their mistakes. I remember rory calling jesses gf not pretty or saying had she looked in a mirror which I actually so pathetic
Justice for Lindsay! They did her so dirty. She did absolutely nothing wrong and everyone was such an as**ole to her! The show normalized Dean cheating on her as if that's okay to do if it's with someone "special" like Rory 🤢
The fact that they eat out so much and eat a lot of crap, but stay thin and brag about being thin/are complemented for this is one of the more annoying aspects to the show. Plus they shame other women for not being as thin as them! - this is a classic cool girl trait to me. I think it’s more cool girl than pick me girl problem seen in Gilmore girls. This cool girl attitude also bleeds into their music, movie and book taste as well at times.
Also there’s variations like when it comes to being feminine what about body types? Like being curvy vs thin? Or not looking a certain way whether you’re girly or not? Also many women don’t stay at home because stay at home moms often are isolated . Also idk how Rory is special bc she had great grades many students had great grades it’s normal
They’re not pick mes lol they’re more like manic pixie dream girls who lean more to a feminist dream of what a guy wants. Lindsay, by definition to them, would be a pick me, which is absurd.
The show very clearly calls Rory out on her behavior. They made a point to demonstrate how Rory's comments where hurtful to Lindsay. They portrayed Lindsay as a victim. A victim of the patriarchy. I also think that Rory's snobby attitude was intentional to demonstrate her grandparents influence on her. We are supposed to recognize these characters are flawed.
I feel so sad for Lindsay because she was with Dean and she was happy and relaxed. But then, Rory ends up sleeping with Dean and ruining the marriage. And it seemed like Lindsay was so sweet but the show portrayed her as being dumb at times for wanting a more traditional lifestyle. I feel like "A year in the Life" really highlighted the downfalls Rory had. Very interesting and enjoyable video! Keep up the awesome work
The whole thing about Lane being a cheerleader bothers me so much because *why* did Rory have a problem with it? Lane was barely allowed to do anything. She had to hide her biggest passion from her mom and was constantly forced to do stuff she didn't want to do (Forced dates with guys, food that she seemingly didn't like) And the one time Lane's mom allows her to do something that's fun Rory decides to... Cut her out? judge her? For what?
it always bothered me, it wasn’t like a “this isn’t the real you” kind of thing, it was just rory being a hater to lane for trying something new and branching out
Lane and Lindsay were done so dirty. When I was a pre-teen I was so annoyed by Lindsay because we saw her through the eyes of judgemental and jealous Rory. As I grew up I'm full on the side of Lindsay. She was cheated on, gaslighted on, hated on for just living and then thrown away. Lindsay deserved the same respect, love and attention Rory got. I love Gilmore Girls because of nostalgia but as a 35 year old woman, Rory and Lorelai became the villains to me.
Let’s not attack girls who don’t like things that aren’t traditionally feminine. It’s fine to be a tomboy or to like sports and not like makeup and things. It’s not ok to trash other women and steal men from other women and change yourself to please a man. And there’s plenty of girls who are super feminine who do that.
Thoughts on the reboot season? I was disgusted in particular with Rory, who became a reliant-on-a-guy hook-up girl with Logan. I felt like her character in particular, but Lorelai's as well, were out-of-character and neither turned out great. I'd expected more, especially with them both being so "special".
I was really wanting an explanation of why Rory was failing to flourish. In the series they were the cool ones we wanted to be. It's like the veil was lifted and I suddenly saw Lorelei and Rory as a toxic little codependent bubble who don't accomplish anything but make fun of girls who do. I think Rory fell victim to assuming she was special and special things would happen.
I read a theory that the initial run of the show was the book that Rory says she will write on the reboot. That would explain why she's so beloved and gifted in the og show, but pretty unlikable in the reboot.
Yeah I think the concept of the show is feminist but most of the characters are fake feminists. It was sealed for me early on in season3. Remember that one time Rory goes out of her way to bully Jess’s girlfriend. She goes to her place of work and calls her stupid for talking on the phone. I think she even threatens to have her fired. This is all while she’s dating Dean keep in mind. She never apologizes or anything. She always blames the other woman rather than herself or the guy.. yikes.
This is a product of its era, this was really progressive concept at the time. The pick me I’m not like other girls started with good intentions, to highlight to women there were other ways to live your life, that you didn’t HAVE to follow the ‘normal’ way of being a woman you could have independent interests and wants and desires. But as all good intentions it then turned into an us vs them thing. That then progressed into the attitude today of, you can be whatever you want, you like what you want and do what you want and still be a woman. Its like in the 80s/90s the attitude of woman can have it all, career and a family, which was an essential transitional stage between trad wife and now, where we are acknowledging that it’s really hard to have it all and shouldn’t really be the aim, it’s about moderation. In both these examples in society the balance tips a lot in both directions before it settles on a middle ground.
I've felt this same way about Lorelai and Rory's sense of "superiority" when it comes to what other people like, especially other women. On the one hand, I love each of them for who they are and the ways I can relate to their pop culture tastes. On the other hand, I think they are unrelatable to a lot of women in several ways. There are so many women who can't eat the way they do and not face any consequences in their weight or their skin. They like alternative music, mainly classic rock or certain metal genres, but they make fun of the emo music scene of the early 2000s, which was an entire culture that many "normal" or "popular" girls made fun of at the time. All this to just say that the Gilmore girls are such likable characters but in some ways I really think they are hard to relate to. I'm also speaking as a neurodivergent person, so maybe that has some part in it as well.
That one scene where Logan and Rory go out and Logan tells her that "the best part of going to eat with you is the look on people's faces when you order" (I don't remember the exact dialogue. It went something like this) really pissed me off. Tf were the writers trying to convey with that scene?!
I think they were sneaky "pick-me" girls at various times. They made a few snarky comments about other women, specifically romantic rivals, to the guys they liked. But it was not often or overt. I was glad not to see too much of that, because it wasn't a good look for them.
I can answer the why in this - Amy Sherman-Palladino. I think it comes across more in her earlier work than in say Marvellous Mrs Masel, but Amy clearly dislikes "other girls". From being a snob about movies and music, to making sure her leading ladies are set apart because they (unlike other girls) are funny and quirky, her personal individualism definitely seeps into her writing.
There is literally a several episodes where Lorelai questions if she only likes the things she likes cause she was sure her mother would disapprove. Most loudly questioning while discussing her love of pop tarts. She was spiraling about it and all
Sometimes everyone forgets that its not only about what is being said but also who says it. I dont think the showmakers wanted us to agree with everything what a major character says. Why is everyone looking at these characters as role models? For example: Jess mocks Lindsey's music taste, because he is a character who would do that. Not because he is right. When a character says something it tells more about them than what they are talking about.
the fact is that this show was from the early 2000s and back then we all accepted the jokes and didn't think too hard about feminism and mysoginism, it was just a 'cool mom, the uptight daughter and the funny small town people'
Cool video but just so everyone knows(bc i see some commenters mixing them up),a 'pick me' and 'not like other girls' girl are very different breeds(they interlock a lot though) A pick me:puts other women down for male validation,wants to be chosen(pick me,choose me,love me) Not like other girls:put other women down so they can feel special/better about themselves,usually are very insecure Throughout the show I feel they honestly fall into both these categories😂I still adore this show though,juiciest drama I've ever seen
My take is this: I saw another video that talked about how, though the show centers around Rory’s coming of age, it’s really about Lorelei growing up. Part of that growing up was when she realized that so much of her personality was rebellion against her mom. She acknowledges several times in the show that she wants a man and “the whole package.” I think her judgment on other more traditional women was based on her insecurity of not having that and secretly wanting it. That was her major flaw. The problem Rory had with her development is she enshrined Lorelei so much, that she viewed her flaws as attributes to aspire to. If Lorelei insulted another woman out of insecurity, Rory thought of it as “oh, that is what will make me like my mom who I want to be like.” The thing is, Lorelei ends up growing out of that.
I think it’s funny how there are so many people who think Rory and Lorelai would be swifties bc they don’t like mainstream music and Taylor Swift is mainstream🤣
i started watching this show for the first time this year, and i can't help but think how every single person in it is more interesting than the gilmore girls
When I was young I really could eat absolutely everything and stay thin. Then I hit about 35 and had my 3rd child and now I’m twice my ideal weight and nothing seems to drop it.
Thankfully I watched this show as an adult and immediately saw the “pick me” stuff. The whole “they’re not like other girls! They eat!!” was so tiring.
Love this ❤️ let’s support one another. The fact that we call working for a corporation a true desire and raising children an “adaptive preference” is a rant in itself.
I don’t think they’re pick me girls at all. Hate me for saying this but, I think that they’re just really pretty privileged girls who got everything they wanted and needed from anyone and everyone whenever it was demanded. So when they don’t get everything their way they lash out. Also to speak on the talk about the size of body , keep in mind this show came out in the early 2000s when no one was as body positive as they are now. There really wasn’t too much recourses or media with plus sized people in it. The early 2000s beauty standards were all about being skinny and fitting into size 0 jeans like those models in the magazines. The show does however show great representation of what it’s like living as someone who didn’t grow up with much or in a non white household. For example Lane with her struggling Asian identity and trying to be the perfect Korean even if born in America , Jess and not having a home and then not having anyone to count on. Especially since racial representation wasn’t as big then as it is now. For the time the show was written I think it was amazing. People today just view it differently because the world’s mindset had change.
Great video ! I completely agree with your analysis on the men's opinion mattering so much more in the series. When you think about it, GG falls short on Its feminist promise (as most "feminist" shows from the 2000s do, like SATC or BTVS). Seeing Rory just waiting for her suitors to fight for her when she should have just walked away has aged rather poorly and is really infuriating. Also, thanks for editiing a "so special" compilation. Didn't the writers know about the "show, don't tell" rule?
I think they know the rule, which is why they showed us they were not that special even though everyone said that. We saw especially Rory realising over and over again that she is not special, there are many people who have just as good grades as her or even better, that she is insecure and jealous to a point were she sleeps with a married man just because she thinks she's sooo special (which she was told all her life) and she can't handle any rejection, romantic or professional.
I've started watching the show this year, I'm almost finishing it, and I can't count how many times I despised Lorelai's or Rory's behavior, they are so full of themselves, it almost feels like a reward seeing Rory failing in the real world as she got older. Emily is my favorite person, at least she's completely honest to herself. Maybe if I had started it 15 years ago I'd think different, but as a woman with almost 30 years, sometimes it is difficult to be empathetic with their silly pretty girls problems
Lorelei was the epitome of sad little rich girl rebel- she was so ungrateful to her parents and where the hell did get the money to open the inn??? My siblings and their friends were obsessed with it so i caught it on tv a lot in my teens. Rory was so smug also. Sorry I had to complain. Lol
@@lizziedrucker9586 YES, the amount of financial privilege they had bc of emily and richard! They paid for rory's entire education and they kept acting like they were these horrible evil people. Also rory dropping out? that made me so mad, i remember it clearly, bc i always wanted to go to an ivy league when i was small, but i knew i couldn't bc money and then rory just throwing that away
I must disagree, both Richard and Emily are incredibly narcisstic, I can see so much of myself inLorelei in the way the parents are all the trying to gaslight you and guilt trip so can control you. That is shy she ran away. Not to escape marriage but to escape emotional abuse. The parents refuse to listen to her and they nebdr give her any emotional support. All that goes to Rory the golden child.
as a queer woman, it makes me super uncomfortable to see how conflated any kind of straying from the strictest of gender roles equates to misogyny. it’s ok to not be like other girls. it’s ok to want to be different. and sports and movies are not inherently masculine. we need to stop gendering everything so much
What i feel watching the show was also like expecting a fake audience laugh and clap at every sentence, like in old comedy show, sitcoms. Every Time, everything they say is supposed to be noticed and i found it exhausting to be honest. Also, about the "not like other girls" aspect, I just felt as if their whole personality revolves around that. And beyond that, there's absolutely nothing making these main characters, well, characters. They are the opposite of a personality, and they end up having none.
I feel like it’s kind of a narcissistic fantasy the main character names her daughter after herself (and gives her a ridiculous nick name) then she probably imposes her own abandoned career path to her child, Lorelei is the ideal type to be a reporter but her daughter would best be an introverted writer which is what happens at the end, but she never realises that being that reporter is just not suitable for her personality, some point this out to her time and again except her mom, who probably intended to raise her as her own mini-me
Rory criticised Shane because she was jealous over Jess. She criticised Lane becoming a cheerleader because she felt like they were growing apart after leaving for Chilton. Both cases don't show a general attitude of demeaning feminine things to set themselves separate from them, but emotional situations she was going through.
tbh, I think some of this makes sense. Since, a part of it is growing up; and we define more and more roles accordingly. For instance, in middle school, from bullying girls can be sl-t shamed. But you grow up and realise -- you don't need to do that. You think when you're younger, that girls have certain roles and interests. And you grow up and realise, there is more. Like, it doesn't make you more feminine or masculine to like certain things -- and I think the characters realise this. Like, when Lane became a cheerleader and cam be understood (AFAIK) and for Rory's roommate -- it became normal she likes sports. To be fair, this is also from the perspective of the main characters -- and we see how they experience and accept new things! That's my opinion. (But as people, can they be a judge? Yea.)
The show does not hold up except for the ambience of Stars Hollow, which is a cozy setting. Irl, these girls would be too much, specifically Lorelai. She always seems on, and I guess that’s a testament to the actress. But it just screams attention seeker. Rory was never as charismatic but was a breath of fresh air after so much energy from her mom. Rory is definitely a bad amalgamation of her mom and grandparents. Her constant cheating is terrible , especially when she is doing it in the four episode special after the series.
“I could never see them putting their friends in uncomfortable embarrassing situations just to gain a man’s affection and attention.” Thue. They never did it for a man. They did it only to validate their own feeling of importance and rightiousness. They’re not “Pick me” girls, but they’re “I pick me, and I expect everyone else do the same, because I’m main character” girls.
I think that you should be how you want to be without putting down others I used to not like wearing dresses or makeup but I never put down other girls for it and I was actually put down for it a few times pick mes aren’t always just the tomboys there’s girly ones and tomboy ones (not that that’s what your videos saying in this video I agree with everything you said) I just hate how some people think just because a girl doesn’t like super feminine things that means they’re a pick me now if anyone calls you a pick me because of the things you like they’re actually the real pick me
I think part of the issue was the writers trying to balance making them humanly flawed characters with them being likable, which may be part of the reason it came out with them seemingly being “special” but also judge mental
Now I dont agree with the social media definition of the pick me girl, which is the "im not like other girls" girl, but gilmore girls does often have that energy with Lorelai and Rory. It's both Lorelai and Rorys thing to be fiercely independent women, which is why the show looks down on women who are the opposite, the traditional housewife who is dependant on a man, particularly Lindsay. Emily is not totally reliant on being a housewife as she does have her own career, where even while Richard is in hospital from his second heart attack she is calling clients. Therefore Emily is somewhat business/ career orientated just like Lorelai and Rory. I do agree that the treatment of Lindsay was horrible, there was such a lack of empathy for this character and portraying her as shallow. however personally I do not think being a woman like Lindsay, pouring their heart and soul into their man, is beneficial to women as a whole. They also look down on Logans mother, who is basically a Trophy wife. The show has many strong female bonds and friendships which I like about it. And I do think its healthier for women to focus on not necessarily a corporate job but a project that is theirs, that does not involve a man - like Lorelai and Sookie creating their dream inn, Rory's dreams to go to an Ivy League school and do journalism. So I do think the show leans more feminist than pick me, where romantic relationships are very meaningful part of life but so is your dreams and female friendships/bonds. Men are very attracted to the Gilmore girls in the show, and even other ambitious female characters like Paris Its like the show writers subconsciously believe that men like the strong independent women, and that women who are like this are happier. I do not disagree with this personally, theres more to life than raising children and staying at home in isolation. Linsday stuck around bored at home waiting for Dean to give her his time and attention and Dean trying to work all the time to provide her with a home etc, it is not a healthy relationship dynamic and women need these other aspects of life to be happier and more fulfilled.
You're wrong. Loreali is a girls girl. She's always supportive of all the women in her life, alot of her issues with traditions come from her strained relationship with her mother and the life she grew up with. The issues Loreali has comes from her inability to teach Rory what's right and wrong, with the fear Rory will run away like she did as a child if she's too firm. Which is an issue as we see Rory never has to confront all the hurt she's out people through, esp Lindsay
@@gilmoregirlz-h7j Rory did a ton Lorelei did some too. An example is the redhead girl who was a fan of paris’s weird old boyfriend they called her “thick thighs” or something
I believe it’s a matter of knowing ourselves…it’s important to know and feel what makes you unique as much as it is important to know and feel what’s similar to oneself with others. I think once one kind of have a glimpse of those extremities it’s a lot more easier to be open to both aspects of life and acknowledge when you are actually different from others be it in qualities, experiences, thought processes, and the likes - and on the other hand acknowledge when you relate with others. Sometimes in life one can be uncomfortable with the former or the latter and there’s nothing wrong with either but it’s a feeling worth navigating. I myself grew up as a people pleaser and in an environment where i observed being extroverted and all bubbly gained a lot of attention and likes… im more introverted growing up… like any human being i also need attention but we often see growing up a very limited view of where we get attention and i kinda interpreted that observation as popularity and being outgoing was the only way meaning i felt i should be more “like the girls” i deemed likable to many guys in our school even that i didn’t practice being in touch with feeling if i really liked things that i was doing or thought to like. I have no sense of self and i crave to feel different and special. But now that i’ve grown up a little more and i’ve gotten to know myself a little more i believe all people have their own uniqueness but we are also similar and related to each other. It’s okay to relate to others but it’s also important not to lose sight of what makes you unique while doing so, and maybe in doing so we break free from feeling or acting pick me knowing that there may be standards setup in society or our community and it’s cool and good if it aligns with you but also cool and good if you feel it doesn’t. Maybe that’s a sign to be more aligned with what one wants and seek experiences, spaces, and people that you feel you belong. Based on my experience it’s easy to feel like one is going insane or feel invisible sometimes when one is in an incompatible environment because naturally that environment might value something else even though what you offer in and of itself is valuable. that’s why it’s important to know what you value and who you are and acknowledge your similarities and differences with others…because generally we’re all unique like everyone else. In gilmore girls i think Rory being the main character and highlighting that her different taste among other girls and her “specialness” being liked in the movie is like a reverse card of my experience where special meant being relatable and approachable and bubbly… so that kinda set a subconscious standard in a way and feelings of inferiority when one isn’t like “that girl”. Nothing wrong with wanting a validation of a man but it’s important to get that with the right kind of man FOR you. I believe it’s a matter of knowing that there are lots of men just like there’s lots of women who have different preferences and that maybe the guys from around you just aren’t the ones for you and who prefers your kind of woman but somewhere someone prefers your kind of woman. So it is important to be your own kind of woman
i adore this show with my whole heart, but the gilmore girls are very pick me (not in the sense of trying to not be feminine, but the whole ‘belittling others to seem better than them’ energy RADIATES off of them, especially rory. i feel like they were written to be the girls who are ideal to the male eye. and how they treated other women in the show was very weird, like rory shaming the ballerinas weight and lorelai making a dig at sookie for not going on as many dates as her rubbed me the wrong way. and the way they treated the blonde characters were so weird - like lindsay was cheated on, trash talked for wanting a simple life and not working (when rory didn’t work at all either LOL) and all because she dated a guy who rory happened to date AND fell out with, the show still tried to make her the bad guy. a lot of the “bad” characters in gilmore girls were blonde too, like shane (jess’s “gf”) and paris, i also think that sherry counts because she bleached her hair at one point. i feel like rory and lorelai are kind and genuine people, but they can be very “i’m so different to the standard girl” at times..
@truestmermaid444 Oh my gosh, I thought I was the only one who saw the demonization of blondes in GG! Funny enough, I made a detailed comment regarding this in another GG video titled: The Sexism We Missed in Gilmore Girls: My Autumn Rewatch by Serena Skybourne (if you want to check that out). I wanna post what I wrote here because I have so many examples of this! Now, I am actually naturally blonde myself, and I watched the series because my mom loved it. But rewatching the show, I can’t help but notice how disrespectful the many characters (mostly Lorelai and Rory) are to the lighter haired girls. Many of the females who are blonde in the show are either: Air-headed, slutty, irresponsible, or the typical mean girls. Louise: One of Paris’s minions (I'd say friend, but realistically, Paris doesn’t go to her or Madeline for true advice or spend time with them outside of school). She really only appears in the Chilton days, but during her screen time, she’s shown to be a slacker in the class, more worried about her appearances and spending time with boys. Heck, during the bangles concert, she and Madeline sneak out to go have fun with older men, not realizing how creepy those guys are. We’re told that she does have good grades, but we’re more so supposed to take the word of the narrative on this one, because most of the time, whenever she is doing projects or homework, she’s not really participating in them and making remarks about sex. Even after the high school arc, we see that she is spending more of her time partying and doing an extended spring break, rather than focusing on school work. Sherry: Christopher’s ex-wife starts the story off by being this open book, who seems to actually appreciate Chris. She’s kind, tries to get along with the main girls, even willing to spend time with Rory because she wants to make a good impression. Especially if she plans to be her step-mother in the future, which is a refreshing take. We learn that she does want to settle with Chris and wants to have at least two kids. She’s a successful business woman for L'Oréal. But as the series goes on, we hear that Chris and Sherry are having relationship problems. (Once again we have to rely on the narrative’s word because we don’t actually get to see this on screen). When Sherry gets pregnant, Chris rushes to marry her because he wants to be responsible. This results in Lorelai becoming jealous of Sherry, acting like a child by egging Jess’s car, and de-organizing the bathroom in Sherry’s apartment. While this was supposed to seem endearing, it comes off as immature, but we’re supposed to root for Lorelai, even though Chris isn’t with her and that was her choice. Later on, Sherry ends up leaving Chirs to pursue her career in Paris, leaving her daughter with him. This showcases that Sherry has become selfish in wanting to put her work before her marriage. This character development feels more like an assassination, because this goes against Sherry’s character. What started out as this open-minded and accepting woman who wanted a life with Chris and to experience motherhood, suddenly decides to ditch her family in favor of her work. While Sherry was work-driven, she also was shown to be fun and loving. So now, it feels like we are supposed to side with Lorelai in her treatment of Sherry (and even Emily’s distrust for her) because Sherry just abandoned Chris and her daughter, with no real warning or sign of wanting to leave. Shane: She only appears for the first few episodes of season 3, and she’s only used as a means for Jess to play mind games with Rory. It’s clear right away that Jess doesn’t care about her, only seeing her as a pawn to try and get Rory to break up with Dean. She appears as a slutty girl, who just wants to have a good time with Jess. And in the episode where Lane dyes her hair, Rory is rude to her at the counter. Sure, she was talking on the phone, but Rory constantly bashes her for not doing her job. Even though Rory was the only one in the store, she was buying one thing, and Shane had every right to be upset. Rory constantly puts down Shane, despite not knowing her. And her being upset with Shane being with Jess, only proves to Dean that Rory has feelings for Jess. So Dean breaks up with Rory, which Rory acts hurt over, even though it’s her own fault, but we’re supposed to blame Shane because she was “taking advantage of Jess and she wasn’t a good fit for him” but that shouldn’t have been up for Rory to decide. And after Rory and Jess get together, we never hear of Shane again. Showcasing that she was just used as a pawn, and once she outlived her purpose, she was disposed of.
@truestnernaud444 Here's part two because I couldn't put all of it in one, thank you YT comments! The Karen squad: On the topic of the episode with Lane dying her hair, in said episode, Lorelai goes to Stars Hollow High School for career day to talk about her work at the Inn. There, kids ask her questions about her being a teen mom. Afterwards, a bunch of the kids' mothers (All blonde mind you) confront Lorelai about how she put ideas into their kids' heads that it’s okay to be a teen parent because Lorelai made it look cool and not difficult. Now, on the one hand, Lorelai was ambushed with all of these questions about her personal life as a teen mom, so she was most likely caught off guard and didn’t know how to give a quick answer right away. On the other hand, she should have expected them to ask questions about her being a teen mom, given that’s how everyone in Stars Hollow knows her as. And Lorelai didn’t exactly handle the situation either. She could have just stated: "Yes, I did have Rory when I was a teen. Yes, it cost me so much in terms of education and a potential better life. But I don’t resent Rory for what happened and I still love her. And my life is pretty cozy, and it worked out. But that doesn’t mean it was easy, I had to bust my ass just to support me and my daughter with a high school diploma and working a minimum wage job at the inn. And it took me so long just to be able to support myself and Rory on my own. Because of that, I don’t believe anyone should have to go through being a teen parent, especially when you have little options. But I also appreciate those teen moms who work hard to support themselves and their kids so their children can grow up in a better life." Lorelai could have just said this and moved on, but then again that would mean she would be a mature woman, which she isn’t. And the moms had a right to be upset, especially if their kids did think being a teen parent was cool, due to how Lorelai portrayed it. Even a Karen can be reasonable once in a while. Linsey: She was introduced halfway through season three, when Dean is playing hockey and we see he has moved on from Rory. Linsey is the stereotypical feminine woman. She’s attentive to Dean, constantly hugging and kissing him, but isn’t too clingy, and she seems content with wanting to marry him and is happy with being his wife. Sure, she may have arguments with him about not spending time with her, but Dean points out that they need the money to move out and to get a townhouse. We’re told by the narrative that Linsey wants a townhouse, but once again we have to take the word of the story, because we never hear from her if that is what she wants. Dean is also shown to be a hard worker and has the conservative belief to be a breadwinner, so it’s possible this could be his dream rather than hers. But Rory instead blames Linsey for Dean dropping out of college, and for making Dean work so hard. And Linsey is not wrong for wanting Dean to no longer be around Rory, especially when Rory admits she still has feelings for Dean. And when Linsey finds out Dean and Rory had an affair, again, she has every right to be upset. Especially when she was trying to be a supportive wife for Dean by making him brownies and his favorite meal! She literally went to the butcher to learn how to cook roast because she wanted to make Dean happy! And when she confronts Rory about sleeping with Dean, she again has every right to be upset and angry! Rory broke up a marriage (a young one, but still a marriage) but we are made to feel sorry for only Rory, especially when Lorelai defends her daughter saying that they didn’t need to make this public. Linsey becomes the villain in the eyes of Rory, but in reality, Linsey is the victim and Rory is the other woman! Paris: Unlike most of the other blondes mentioned, Paris is seen as an equal to Rory. She’s hard-working, dedicated, and very academic. But she is also shown to be the mean girl to Rory, belittling and bullying her around. She also has the need for perfectionism, and will not hesitate to tear others down just to win. Like in debates, she constantly mocks Brad to psyche him out so he fumbles in his presentations. She also gaslights Rory at times during the bi-centinal speech competition by calling Rory out for trying to play mind games with her, when Paris was doing the same thing. While Paris does grow as a character over the course of the series, she still has those terrible flaws of using others to get what she wants and will oftentimes push Rory aside to make herself look better. (Also, I find it a bit off that Rory has a better friendship with Paris, her high school bully, over the course of the series than she does with Lane, who is supposed to be her childhood friend. Like I’m pretty sure Rory has more screen time with Paris than with Lane. Really think about that.) Now, is it possible that Amy didn’t realize her bias to blonde people? Maybe, but again the pattern is too hard to ignore. Lots of the female characters that are blonde are often demonized throughout Gilmore Girls. And considering ASP was trying out the “cool girl, not like other girls” troupe, her bringing down the feminine side of women wouldn’t be out of the question. Especially considering this is a common theme with this troupe, where the said Not like other girls, will often vilify or demonize others of the feminine side to make them look more desirable. Again, as a blonde myself, I do feel a bit insecure whenever I look back at this series and the treatment of said light-haired characters. Because it makes me feel like I should be that way due to being a blonde. I also wouldn’t be surprised if other girls with blonde hair have some self-esteem issues after watching this series, because they have been painted as these terrible people due to the presentation of the show. It’s really sad because some female icons like Barbie and She-ra are blondes, but they aren’t the ones putting down their friends just because they don’t look like them!
I’ve never heard of a “pick me” girl before so thanks for educating. I was more of an outcast in school but I always loved the show because the age gap between my mother & i is the same as lorelai & Rory
I think the biggest misconception about feminism is that it's about women being able to chose. It's not about that, that comes later, after the fight to have equal rights, which is what feminism is, a fight for rights and against discrimination towards women
Only considering that if they eat all the trashy food they do during the serie, they would probably not be skinnies or would end up in the hospital. This certainly is very pick me fantasy.
I was so sad to see Rory becoming less and less supportive of the girls around her as she got older. She wasn’t a good friend to Lane most of the time and we all know Lane needed an actual best friend the most.
Facts
i havent watched all of the seasons but lane wasnt always a good friend to rory... she was literally secretely hooking up with dean.
@@Sophnmuffin what?😂😂😂
@@Sophnmuffin when?!?!
@@Sophnmuffin no she wasn't 😂 they were study buddies. But I do think it's bizarre that people hate on Rory so much, as if she's supposed to be this perfect character lol. I love her and Lane's friendship, they can mess up but will recognize when they do and work on changing their behavior.
I think they’re more “cool girl” than anything else. The “I eat everything and stay a size 2” “I’m beautiful and feminine effortlessly unlike the other girls who try too hard” “guys like me more because I’m low maintenance” kind of cool girl.
exactly this is just the "chill girl" in the way they dont care either way and aren't actually trying to be their own person to blend in with the "other girls" in a sense
This is exactly how I viewed it. It's a bit painful to watch at times.
Absolutely. They're not as sexy or sporty as other cool girls, but that's definitely what the writers were going for. The effortlessly beautiful low maintenance intelligent girls. I don't think the writers were necessarily thinking about how much of a guy's fantasy that is.
They’re also just ‘fat phobic girl’
Absolutely
The way Lindsay is treated is disgusting. She wants to get married and have kids and cook and clean. That's perfectly fine as long as it's her choice and she has a partner who agrees. Also, Michelle Branch and Matchbox Twenty have some pretty good music. I'm not a fan of Taylor Swift or Arianna Grande, but they are talented and I don't think someone is wrong for liking their music.
Justice for Lindsay
matchbox twenty is literally one of my favorite bands. #justiceforlindsay
Ms Michelle Branch is so coool and PURE NOSTALGIA for me lovee her voicee😩🔥
I agree, I used to be a bit of a music snob for a phase, but as I get older I'm like, wait, that is so rude, people like what they like and my music taste is prob so cringe to other people, lmao. I remember watching this clip in high school though thinking jess was such a jerk! I was like Michelle Branch is sooooooo good, c'mon!! There is a scene where Dean's sister is playing Avril Lavigne and Rory says "We need to get her some Ramones" and I'm like yes, love them too, but Avril is also the MOMENT.
They literally never said otherwise. Not once is her dream diminished. The realities of being dependent on your husband economically in a social and legal system that exploits domestic labour by not recognizing it as work and leave women vulnerable to abuse and exploitation is what is scary to most women about that life, Lindsey is a fairytale version of the housewife dream, she has a support networth and didn't have children with the man she married at 19, who verbally disrespects her and cheats on her. The liberal feminist view that theres a push against women who dream of this life is nothing but propaganda, the scorn isn't towards having kids or cooking, the scorn is towards a system in which these women exist as indentured servants. Western women are so delusional when it comes to domestic works place in society.
I don’t think it’s them feeling superiority over other women, it’s them feeling superior over humankind as a whole lol
Thanks, I couldnt pinpoint what made me uncomfortable about the two of them. Like it starts as simple jabs but they can get so casually judgy towards others
That scene you showed of Rory saying “what does Lindsay do all day? Why doesn’t she get a job?” Was quite ripe. I don’t think Rory had ever had a job yet either. She was in college, but she hadn’t had a job. Later on, she can’t keep a job.
But this was a common adage of the time period (the 90s) when it was the norm to raise kids on McDonalds, TV and ADD medication. Parents like that couldn't possibly understand the time and energy that goes into making all your meals from scratch, spending quality time with your children and spouse, maybe garden and raise backyard chickens, etc. so instead they mocked people like that. Now it's known as the crunchy mom movement and more accepted .
She also literally described her grandmother.
The worst part is that she was only hating on her bc she wanted Dean back
Yeah she literally never worked as a teenager
being in college is equivalent to having a job though imo. As someone who studies law I can guarantee you it's at least as stressful a 9/5 job, maybe even more, bc you don't just need to work, but you need to get the results ppl expect and you can never really rest
I think Rory meant this more in a kind of "how does she spend her time all day?" way and not in a "how does she contribute to the economy" way
It’s almost like Lorelai and Rory make you feel jealous of their “specialness” but you can’t even blame them or get angry at them because they are not actually “pick me’s”
Honestly, I never thought they were special, I thought they were likeable and relatable.
I wouldn't say the show tried to porttay them as special. The whole point is that they weren't.
Rory was an average girl who has good grades and wanted to go to Harvard, Loralei is a single mother whose conservative parents abandoned because she got pregnant at a young age.
I really never saw any specialness except that which comes with being relatable 😊
@@samf.s.7731 tbh I disagree. Rory is unbelievably beautiful (imo) extremely smart, likeable and gets good looking guys easily, even ones who are super rich, also she's supported by her mega rich grandparents. She is portrayed as special, imo.
@@R_S747 Agreed, she is treated as magical.
@@loosilu yeah like the point of the show to me was to show how if you tell and treat someone like they're special constantly it's gonna lead to their downfall when they face real struggle in life because they've never had to overcome it before, that's why Rory becomes super entitled in the 2016 follow up
@@R_S747 I think you just nailed it. I think that's exactly Rory's trajectory. And she's preying on men who belong to someone else, like she's entitled o them.
i think rory and lorelai are very much what the "i'm not like other girls" trend meant. once everyone replaced this trend with the "pick me girl" concept, the meaning of it really became distorted for me. not everything the "i'm not like other girls" girls do is to get male atention, but it really is to set them apart from other girls and get more oportunities and feel superior, and that's what rory and lorelai would do in my opinion. they were just arrogant, just like richard and emily and all the other gilmores.
This exactly
Yes!! Exactly!
For someone who looked down on rich people because of "privelege" and bla bla bla Lorelai was awfully arrogant and not better than any of them.
Pick me and not like other girls are different
@@radhiadeedou8286 yeah, i agree. i don't think the gilmores are "pick me", i think they just think they are "not like the other girls"
While I agree with your take, Emily Gilmore is not exactly a “traditional housewife”, since she literally has maids - more like a typical rich wife who actually gets along with her husband for the most part and is not a trophy wife
Emily was authentic. And she wasn't ashamed of her traditional ways. She was toxic in many many ways but at least she took responsibility about who she was .
@beverlymarsh6860 I wouldn't say she was always that self-aware. But I agree, for the most part, she viewed her role as important and put her all into it. (I refer to Emily as a "corporate wife," which is how Lorelai referred to her after Jason canceled the insurance company launch party Emily planned. She always saw it as her job to keep the family well-connected and bolster her husband's career.)
@@OzmaOfOzz Authentic how lmao.
She was traditional in the sense that she was always taking care of Richard planning the events for the DAR any of Richard's business meetings/events I'm sure Emily took the liberty of planning even if she paid for catering instead of cooking herself, she pretty much designed the interior of the house from everything to the chairs like she got at mrs. Kim's antiques to the glass apples that she pointed out to Richard that were on the dining room table. She was traditional for a wife who was raised from Rich upbringing where maids and personal chefs are the norm.
I feel like she does fill the most basic housewife expectations: managing the house. Even when society was as smack in the middle of the mid-century nuclear family model, wealth impacted what “managing” looked like, but it was the common denominator
Rory was always so glorified by everyone, and that’s why se he was ruined
in the episode when they tell us rory is valedictorian and paris finds out she tells rory that she’s ok “bc she looked into and many valedictorians ended up amounting to nothing” (not exact but you know). the foreshadowing lol!
"she was ruined" um... that's manosphere speak lmao. it sure is the reason she became maladapted and couldn't deal with criticism or hard work but "ruined" is a silly term, nobody is "ruined" due to their flaws
@@UnBesoDeCristal We are talking about a fictional character after all, I'm sure you're familiar how many thought the writers "ruined" Rory on the 2016 return of the show.
@@rachelhernandez7794and talk about moral ethics she didnt bat an eye at sleeping with a married man just because at some point she dated him, check the entitlement and lack of awareness, this is what happens when you spend the whole time inflating a kids ego by the time the bubble pops and reality hits, the end result is a person that has no sense of whats right or wrong, because all their childhood they heard "how special they are" "how amazing and absolutely wonderful they are" so naturally they think the rules of morality dont apply to them because of how much more SPECIAL than the rest of the poor shmucks they are, so who would ever deny them anything they desire since its their God given right to be the exception to any rule because of how wonderful they are🙄😮💨
@@frstnmlstnm8484 What? Rory displayed awful traits in the original series.
it's also worth mentioning how rory and lorelai could eat whatever they wanted and however much they wanted, and since they're traditionally attractive women, it's quirky and even lustworthy or enticing to the men. women who don't fall under what society deems an acceptable or healthy "look" would be ridiculed. thats another pick me trope that rings strong in this show
Yessss I was rolling my eyes so hard at them bringing up how much food they eat and how they eat junk. I have eyes, I can see those two women. They are not eating that crap
Wrong. A lot of skinny women eat junk food.
@Katie H i agree, that their food habits were directly mentioned one too many times
However, the actors did mention that they ate all the food on set
@@katieh8186 although the trope is annoying especially when it’s over done thin ppl with fast metabolisms do infact exsist Katie.
@@GoddesssofMind they do. that's not what i'm saying. i'm saying when skinny people do it it's commonly seen as okay, in this show it's considered funny and endearing. when other people do it they're shamed for being unhealthy.
Reminds me of that one line in Little Women where Meg says her dreams aren't any less important than Jo's just because she wants to settle down and start a family. A woman's choice and opinion shouldn't be put down regardless of how different or similar they are to other women.
They're the type of girls to roll their eyes at another girl wearing a lot of makeup because they wake up with flawless features naturally
Exactly
Yes! There's this scene in the show, where Lorelai tells Rory to put on some makeup before going to bed, because some girls from her high school are going to wake her up as a surprise for a secret club meeting at midnight. Eventually, when they do wake her up, she's looking flawless and all of the other new girls who have been woken up as well look how a normal person would wake up, Paris, had cream on her face, etc. Which I guess was to put Rory's enemy down and make her look good.
@francescajx yes and also when Paris asked her, "do you always look like this, after waking up?" Because she got even more insecure after seeing her, to which she replied, yes
Shane was treated awful too. Lorelei called her a freak and Jess was awful to her. All she did was date Jess and I guess because she was sexually active, she was constantly hated on.
Oh yeah, I forgot all about the slut shaming in this show
Even Rory was like that to her like when Shane was on the phone at the salon. Like just because you like her boyfriend and Shane wasn’t necessarily nice to Rory (because she started it) doesn’t give you the right to hate on women. That’s when I started not to like Rory that much bc she was attacking Shane for no reason which goes against what she started out as on the show
@@alexissus5788 exactly! And everyone was still on her side
Jess treated Rory horribly too. I honestly don't understand how people like him, he was such an a-hole.
The main thing that bothers me about them is how judgey they are about music.
Fr, they would definitely make fun of girls for liking taylor swift lol.
i know right like you not better than me just cuz you like indi music
fr like when lorelai makes fun of luke for reggae music, hep alien calls groups like fleetwood mac “guilty pleasures”, jess makes fun of lindsay’s fav artists, and tbh a lot of other times. they’re honestly rly elitist in gg. a lot of micro aggressions too in general.
I think there was an episode where I think Lorelei made a slight against Linkin Park and I was like “Woah slow your roll there, ma’am, we’re not doing that” cuz I love LP
The episode where she made fun of Luke for listening to reggae music didn’t age well. It struck me as anti-Black on the writer’s part.
I do think that Rachel - one of Luke’s other love interests - was almost more of a NLOG in her depiction than Lorelei. She was “cool,” loved travel and adventure and even looked great right after a super long flight.
Yup not that she was intentionally trying to be not like other girls, she was just cool but it shows that Lorelais real competition were other women like that in contrast to Nicole. Luke’s preference has always been quirky unconventional women ie anna nardini, Rachel and lorelai - not Nicole which was made obvious to us. The show set Nicole up just like Lindsay and sherry- “basic” women who are no real competition to the Gilmore girls.
@@irem021 the scene in her shop with Rory. Watch that
To add on to that I noticed that the writers made Lorelei only have friends or like other girls who were "unconventionally unattraktive". A huge reason why Lorelai was so insecure around Luke's ex was because she was conventionally beautiful and she saw her like competition.
@joelleweetjewel9948 Yep, I'm confused over that as well, which is why I avoid to use terms like this too broadly to characterize women, since it just doesn't sit right to me.
Seems to me like "NLOG" and "pick me girl" have deviated too much from their original meanings, as there's nothing wrong with girls who have unusual hobbies or tastes, or who prefer more traditionally "masculine" things over feminine or don't wear make up. Female personal expression shouldn't be limited to just accept the norms and resigne to just be like everybody else instead of your individual self, since that would be regressive in a lot of ways.
Now, if the Rachel character was constantly comparing herself to another women and painting herself in a better light for doing things in a "superior" way just because she enjoys odd or tomboyish things, yes that's a NLOG. If she does it for male validation, yes that's a pick me. But if that's not present on her character, (I don't remember the character that well to say if that's the case or not) then why label her like that.
I just think of them as the ultimate girly-girl fantasy. They can eat whatever they want and still be thin. Lorelai loves her job, has a beautiful house, is constantly getting compliments from everyone, and has nearly perfect relationship with her daughter. Rory (at least in the TV show) gets everything she wants, always comes out on top, is loved by nearly everyone, and has gorgeous boys fighting over her all the time. They really don't seem to care what other people think. They don't have to be pick me girls, because men fall all over themselves to date them.
yeah even the guy Rory hated at school adored her ugh ridiculous even
Yeah as much of a GG defender that I am, I’ll freely admit the show is basically just a fantasy come true, mostly lol
It’s very unrealistic and both characters are pretty spoilt.
I do respect Lorelei for always putting her daughter first. I realise that that’s part of the fantasy. But still. Through all her faults, she did ultimately accept full responsibility as a parent and mother.
@@someonerandom8552 there's nothing wrong with a show being a fantasy. It's nice to escape reality sometimes and it's much more intelligent than most sitcoms.
@@doesitmatterwhoiam8838 This is true
@@doesitmatterwhoiam8838true. Why I would like to see a depressing reflection of my imperfect life I enjoy so much watching Gilmore girls ❤ and the outfits are always on point.
I think the show usually strikes a balance between an almost fairytale escapism and real, flawed characters. Amy Sherman-Palladino has discussed how (a) she doesn't care about "the moral of the story" and (b) she wanted to create an ideal "snow globe world" in Stars Hollow. In order to have a good drama, you need flaws and difficulties. But the escapism is clear from the jump: (1) the girls eat junk food and never gain weight or have breakouts, (2) they can afford restaurants, shopping sprees, and an idyllic country home on a single mom budget, (3) the whole town loves them and men fall at their feet, (4) they almost always have something witty to say, (5) they have seemingly boundless energy for every activity under the sun.
The only problems introduced are for story purposes. Otherwise, they are Wonderwoman. Or Electrawoman and Dynagirl. Or any other fictional superheroes. We're supposed to watch these women who can do basically anything, and who live in this idyllic world, and escape the daily pressures of our lives for a while. When they screw up, or when an outside pressure is introduced for story purposes, it makes for good drama, but it can be hard to balance with the superhero aspect. I think we're just noticing that balancing act more in hindsight.
I agree, I don't understand people who complains about the junk food bit. It's a fantasy, not everything has to be so literal.
That’s fair. It almost feels like because they’re women we’re more critical of them.
Not saying that’s the case, just putting that out there.
But it doesn’t have to be super literal, nor does it need to be super idyllic. It was a quirky drama involving flawed characters but had a fantasy element at the centre. That’s fine too
@someonerandom8552 I completely believe that, in general, people are more critical of flawed women. And it's hard because their flaws deserve criticism, but in similar cases with men, it's not looked on so critically.
@@Aelffwynn Amen!
I have no issues with people criticising women for their actions or flaws. That’s valid. But it can become a bit hard to discern between good faith criticisms (which again I have no issue with) and just being overly judgemental because women are harshly evaluated.
I’m not saying men don’t also have harsh standards they feel obligated to uphold, obviously. Just that society can be very unforgiving and the standards are different.
I don’t want to make it seem like a contest, of course. Feel like I need to make that super clear, lest people jump on me lol
This is so well put! I haven't watched the show in years and I don't remember it super well, but it definitely smacks of escapism and fantasy looking back. Everything you said, the eating junk food but still being healthy, the endless men, all of it.
I feel like race plays alot into it as well. Like Lane is so unique and to me more of a "not like other girls" person than rory - but she's not as glorified by every character like rory. it's like when you are a girl of color no matter how "unique" or "interesting" you are you present poc first and tend to be ignored.
I have thought this for a multitude of years.
Awesome point. And she ends up traditional housewife supporting her husband, with a non-ego driven job and family. She is a grown up. And happy.
I’ve always felt like Lane got looked over. Lane did fun things and had a band. She was cerebral but it wasn’t her identity. For Lane’s character to go the way it did, imo, was unfair. Her life should have ended up more interesting…no shade. I feel like the writers for the reboot really overlooked a possible storyline with Lane beginning to see or reach some success with the band while Rory struggled to find her purpose. After all, Rory was the special one who went to special schools and knew special people right? This could have been an amazing conflict to force her to realize that despite everything she had a level of arrogance. She low key thought that she was better. Better than even her bestie.
@@chamab.6800 I agree! She definitely deserved an extended storyline - it would've been great to see Rory realize Lane's success and that she wasn't better than her. I feel like even in the earlier seasons lane was not written into certain episodes. It would've been cool to see Lane grow into herself because she was such an interesting character!
@Mary-Cate You can't say that if Jane was white, it'd be the same. If she was white, she'd threaten the "superiority" built into Rory and her mother. They are, evidently, the only desirable females in town. The only ones who "aren't like the others".
The OPs comment is right on. When you know, you know.
Sadly very true description of this show. I used to like it but when I watched it as an adult, it looked quite different to me.
I still enjoy it and there are great things we can take away from the show, but you’re right it hits different from an older perspective. To a big extent it’s a great reflection of the times it was made in and how much we’ve grown as a society in understanding some problematic elements of the show.
Yeah exactly!
@@Silverscreenfreak I can still enjoy it too, but it feels different. I used to idolize Lorelei so much.
@@biljam972 When the 2016 revival came out, I was shocked by how much I wanted to smack Lorelei and how horrible she was to her mother.
@@Silverscreenfreak very much agree!! my mom was a single parent, and though i had older brothers too, my mom & i were as tight as them on the show, so the show meant a lot to us and we bonded over it. but seeing clips of it grown up sometimes is just eek to me. but it still reminds me of my late mother so i will always love it even when it makes me cringe lol.
I was at a prenatal appointment and my Dr asked if I worked and I said no I’m a SAHM. And she said that’s a very hard job. My in-laws always mock me and ask when I’ll get a real job so it was refreshing to be validated by another woman.
Power to all the moms and SAHMs...Lord knows I could NEVER be either, lol.
You're so lucky! I wish I could be a SAHM one day but I have no kids rn and unfortunately my in laws also are the type to where the woman should be working too. My mom was a SAHM and I feel so grateful, I'm sure your kids will really appreciate it.
You have the hardest job 👑, this coming from a childless woman.
Lmao not harder than a doctor
I always thought it was a little weird how they were like local celebrities and put on a pedestal while at the same time they were supposed to be so quirky and against the grain. I mean the show is just such a fantasy but I mean that's tv for you.
Also it’s not like they have been living there forever, they only moved there pretty recently according to the show, and they seem like very average people? Maybe pretty girls, but not very special..
Yeah I feel like irl them consistently being a little bit annoying because they think they can get away with it (bc they’re pretty and thin) would make them low key hated by everyone in a small town and there would be hella gossip about them
Let's not forget that one scene with professor Fleming and Rory about Rory's grade where Rory calls the red head "fat" because of her thighs. She also blames Paris for the whole situation of the "affair" instead of getting upset at professor Fleming who is 60 mind you for dating an 18 year old girl (Paris). Which yes Paris was wrong for the affair but I wouldn't even call it an affair because it seems as tho Paris was groomed in that relationship.
also, I could've sworn he wasn't married at the time they started dating, so maybe just regular grooming :/
That was normal female behaviour pre-2010s though. It may seem horrible to us now, but many women of that generation were raised to believe that having larger thighs and hips was ugly and bad. My Gen X mum still comments on other women's "thunder thighs".
@@roseg2239 Yep, I was a teenager in the 00s and I was called fatass 😅 tiny butt and big boobs were in back then.
Wasn’t she dating someone named Jamie when she started dating her professor?
This is why I love the fan theory that the tv show is based on the book Rory writes in the revival. And it's her romanticising her life and relationship with her mother.
The show really appealed to me because I wanted to be the special girl. In hindsight, I feel like Lindsay really got the short end of the stick, given how Dean and Rory slept together.
I guess I should have stanned Lanie all along.
I read a tweet the other day "I am so impressed rory waited till marriage. Not her marriage. But anyway, a marriage."
Lindsay deserved better than Dean. I wish Luke had advised Dean not to marry her when he saw he was clearly still hung up on Rory.
@@wolftownesque True instead he just told Rory not to go to the wedding, maybe if she did, Dean wouldn't have gone through with it and saved Lindsay a divorce and worse headache later, poor Lindsay deserved better, she seemed like a sweet girl, but because she's not RORY GILMORE, we're supposed to hate her? And root for Dean's infidelity?
@@not-a-ghost2206 Lmfao
I think they are pick me's in a very "girl boss" sense. They embrace feminity and their friendships but are very much in charge and don't accept other women expressing feminity along with "masculine" hobbies. I also think Lorelia specifically pushes away many traditional norms as a act of rebellion against her mother.
i think the Gilmore girls were critical of women who they felt were not being their authentic selves. Sherry having a baby because she felt she had to (ends up abandoning her). Emily following what was expected of her and being the perfect wife and wanting that life for her own daughter. Rory’s criticisms of Jess’ and Dean’s partners was rooted in jealousy. I also believe that Rory wasn’t being critical of Lane for being a cheerleader rather she felt that Lane wasn’t doing it for herself and had never expressed an interest like that; which is also why I love Lane’s response to her, saying she was just curious about what it would be like, and found that it was actually fun! I don’t think they’re pick-mes just extremely self centered 😂 and also unfortunately victims of the times.
Yup this is the vibe I got. When they saw women who were different it’s like they would judge because they felt they knew that the women weren’t being genuine. Like “who are you trying so hard for?” “You actually like overworking yourself and juggling all these things?” “You don’t want to do anything other than stay at home with children, really?” They were doubtful of women because those things were not THEIR idea of happiness. But that’s problematic too
Yep you’re so right. Like often I get why Lorelie wants to rebel against her mother but at the same time she often just acts like a brat. Rory just gets worse with every season imo like the characters are more developed which shows their flaws with each season but rory just keeps getting worse and feels so much entitlement that it makes me hate her. They just think they’re above everyone with their choices of music and food etc. They are more ‘judgemental girls’ than ‘pick me girls’.
Thank you for this comment thread! This is it.
Thank you for this. You hit the nail on the head. Women often perform femininity because they believe that's what's expected of them. A free thinking woman stays true to herself and doesn't perform for others.
I don't think Rory was an authentic person. She wanted to go to Harvard just because, just to feel superior, she knew nothing about the process of getting accepted, she didn't research about other college journalism programs, she just decided that Harvard was the best and because she's also the best, she will go there and end of story. She didn't accept to think about other careers choice, to try other things and see what she really likes, she was 5 when she decided to be like Christiane Amanpour and that's it, no more thinking is need it. Rory only goal was to prove how incredible superior she was.
I think what makes Gilmore Girls a great show is that you can find things to discuss even so many years after it ended. It’s a show that makes you think, always.
As for the pick me energy, I think Lorelai and Rory are definitely people who look down on certain women, especially traditional women. I don’t think the show is framing the Gilmore Girls as right, they sort of just show all women on the spectrum.
I agree with some people on here about Lindsay, I felt like she was treated so terribly as a character and Rory is really quite the villain in that scenario. I disagree when it comes to Sherri or day Rachel. I think Lorelai is a bit more lenient and upfront when it comes to supporting women and sort of throws in the towel without compromising who she is as a feminist. She realizes it's just complicated with Rachel and Sherri and we see her as a bit insecure around powerful women like that. I think Lorelai sees Rachel and Sherri and views them as these perfect women who have it all. Rachel and Sherri really are the cool girls and I feel like Lor sorta wishes she was cool in that way and just accepts that she is cool in her own way, but doesn't tear them down. She is very much in awe of those two women when she discovers them, but I enjoy that she doesn't go out of her way to be mean to them even if there is jealousy there. I think the jealousy is that they have or have had the men she wants to be with. Rory is a bit more petulant and it is not a good quality. I have to say. But hey, I think we are seeing that the ladies aren't perfect and step in the shit quite often, but hey, that's real. This essay is fantastic btw!! Great editing and just really enjoyable!
I totally agree! Even though, through Rory's lens, she's justified in sleeping with Dean, Lorelai knows it's wrong and calls her out. Lorelai even kind of admires Dean's marriage (in a convo with Sookie) when Rory's not around. She defends Rory against Lindsay's mother, because she's not going to let anyone tear into her daughter in public like that. But she doesn't defend her actions. (She even says something to the effect of, "I know Rory was wrong, but don't do this.) There's a reason we keep returning to this series, and it's not because the characters are perfect angels. We like flawed characters. They're interesting and real.
💯, Lorelai seemed to be more envious of the fact that they weren’t teen moms and really had nothing keeping them from achieving their goals. I think she actually had a lot in common with them, because despite having had a daughter so young, she was accomplishing so many things. And the older I get the more I believe people don’t start seeing their financial lives improving until their 30s when their careers are more settled 😅
Rory is evil
I felt free when I heard that Amy Sherman-Palladino didn't care about Gilmore Girls being a show with a message. However, I do enjoy video essays about it, because it doesn't hurt to reflect about the content we consume.
OMG you just put in words the complicated feelings I had towards the show for a while. I'm so relief to watch some good criticism on this. I always had this feeeling that they where so special, so different, things worked in a diffent way that it worked for other women on the show, and why was that? are they reallly that good? should we be like them so life would be nice for us? It's almost like a feminism only for feminists, other girls are just benighted and don't deserve better.
Feminism is supposed to be for everyone to make their own choices (it's even for men, because if more women can choose to work, more men can choose to stay home if they want. It's more complex than that, but there's the gist.) And Rory and Lorelai pay lip service to that. But at the end of the day, they aren't always supportive of other women's goals because they are flawed characters in a flawed world. For them, it mostly comes down to personal jealousy. Rory liked Lindsay until Lindsay started dating Dean. Lorelai got along incredibly well with Rachel, and they probably would have been friends if not for Luke. Sherri *is* high-strung and has issues, but she's perfectly nice, and Rory knows that. It's through Lorelai's lens of jealousy that we poke fun at her.
The way the ate so much junk food and never got sick, not to mention how unhealthy it was and how they never gained weight. I mean who can literally eat so much junk and not get sick and have so much energy? That has *always* bugged me...
It’s more sad when you realised that Lauren Graham barely eat to maintain her figure in the series.
@Lauren Oh, they didn't they just took want they wanted, because they were special.
@@loosilu Right?! Luke gave them free food before he got together with Lorelei and even after she cheated on him and they broke up! What’s up with that?
@@moonbatt Because they were that special! They were allowed to take anything they wanted from a dude who wasn't making a lot of money, because they deserved it.
@@loosilu I know. It just really bugged me!! 😝
I love love love Emily Gilmore. She is a feminist in her own way. I couldn’t stand Rory. I felt bad for Lindsay especially that she married Dean and Dean cheated on her with Rory and Rory didn’t GAF.
Rory thought Dean belonged to her, so his wife didn't matter. I was so disgusted by her behavior.
@@loosilu ikrrr
Emily, who was horrible to literally all the women in her life was a feminist???? She’s a tragic figure, sure….. I think even sympathetic. That is - I get where she’s coming from. But unless feminism suddenly means something different…..
@@bookNerd151 Emily was horrible to who? She was wonderful to Rory. With adult eyes I very much see her frustration with Lorelei, who looks like an entitled brat.
@@loosilu I'll just leave this here. There are more episodes. Might change your perspective on it. ruclips.net/video/IJtFpBdTvms/видео.html
this is such an interesting take! i'm only part of the way through the show, but i think that i agree with you! honestly i think it was a of a product of its times (the early 2000s) and was pretty forward thinking, but still a little bit sexist, very early 2000s lol.
I’ll always remember how Rory wrote about that ballerina at the school paper. Rory commented on her body and the way she danced in such a horrible way and everyone around her supported it. It really showed me how other people view Rory to such a high standard and excuse her judgemental /mean behaviour, allowing her to never really take accountability
What makes GG so addictive is everyone in that world/universe was living their own life according to their own personality quirks. Even Lane found a way to be herself whilst under the thumb of her hyper controlling mother. Emily loved being a corporate wife. Never once did she seem like a victim. Once she marveled at the fact that Lorelai was a kayak while she was a canoe, but she didn't seem deeply affected by it. If anything bothered her it was the fact that Lorelai had to be coerced to spend time with her whereas Rory loved to hang out with her mother.
Yeah, Lorelai and Rory judged other women (and men) based on their music preference. They did tend think they're better than people that were too mainstream. They weren't perfect, but if they were perfect, people would be complaining about that too. Oh, wait minute, yes, people do complain that Rory's too perfect.
I love Lindsay Lister so much. She deserves the entire world, and Arielle Kebbel is so cute. I hate that Lindsay was vilified for normal girlfriend/wife behavior like not trusting her partner’s ex, and also vilified for getting joy out of trying to please him, and fulfillment out of domestic work. Her absolute joy at getting the roast beef right, her cuteness in her Marilyn Monroe dress, when Dean literally was just cheating on her and has been verbally and emotionally abusing her for doing her best but not being Rory… it breaks my heart! I loved the little bread basket shaped like a duck, and I hope she kept it in the divorce. I just love Lindsay so much, I want to give her an enormous hug.
Yes, she deserves such a happy ending
I'm suprised that yoy dont mention that the moment Rory got a boyfrend she had no time for Lane, there is a whole episode about it
I think this is kind of missing that Emily's life is entirely built around being her husband's wife, living up to the standards of being with him, and in the final season she confronts that part of her life.
They had a superiory complex very simple. They thought they were everything and rarely owned up to their mistakes. I remember rory calling jesses gf not pretty or saying had she looked in a mirror which I actually so pathetic
Justice for Lindsay! They did her so dirty. She did absolutely nothing wrong and everyone was such an as**ole to her! The show normalized Dean cheating on her as if that's okay to do if it's with someone "special" like Rory 🤢
The fact that they eat out so much and eat a lot of crap, but stay thin and brag about being thin/are complemented for this is one of the more annoying aspects to the show. Plus they shame other women for not being as thin as them! - this is a classic cool girl trait to me. I think it’s more cool girl than pick me girl problem seen in Gilmore girls. This cool girl attitude also bleeds into their music, movie and book taste as well at times.
Also there’s variations like when it comes to being feminine what about body types? Like being curvy vs thin? Or not looking a certain way whether you’re girly or not? Also many women don’t stay at home because stay at home moms often are isolated . Also idk how Rory is special bc she had great grades many students had great grades it’s normal
It's cause she is pretty as well, Yhea her only true friend was (I forgot her name) but all the boys wanted her, she was pretty
They’re not pick mes lol they’re more like manic pixie dream girls who lean more to a feminist dream of what a guy wants. Lindsay, by definition to them, would be a pick me, which is absurd.
The show very clearly calls Rory out on her behavior. They made a point to demonstrate how Rory's comments where hurtful to Lindsay. They portrayed Lindsay as a victim. A victim of the patriarchy. I also think that Rory's snobby attitude was intentional to demonstrate her grandparents influence on her. We are supposed to recognize these characters are flawed.
True, and we love a complex female character 😇
I keep telling everyone Gilmore girls were pick me before pick me became a thing, so glad more people are talking about it.
I feel so sad for Lindsay because she was with Dean and she was happy and relaxed. But then, Rory ends up sleeping with Dean and ruining the marriage. And it seemed like Lindsay was so sweet but the show portrayed her as being dumb at times for wanting a more traditional lifestyle. I feel like "A year in the Life" really highlighted the downfalls Rory had. Very interesting and enjoyable video! Keep up the awesome work
The whole thing about Lane being a cheerleader bothers me so much because *why* did Rory have a problem with it? Lane was barely allowed to do anything. She had to hide her biggest passion from her mom and was constantly forced to do stuff she didn't want to do (Forced dates with guys, food that she seemingly didn't like) And the one time Lane's mom allows her to do something that's fun Rory decides to... Cut her out? judge her? For what?
it always bothered me, it wasn’t like a “this isn’t the real you” kind of thing, it was just rory being a hater to lane for trying something new and branching out
Lane and Lindsay were done so dirty. When I was a pre-teen I was so annoyed by Lindsay because we saw her through the eyes of judgemental and jealous Rory. As I grew up I'm full on the side of Lindsay. She was cheated on, gaslighted on, hated on for just living and then thrown away. Lindsay deserved the same respect, love and attention Rory got. I love Gilmore Girls because of nostalgia but as a 35 year old woman, Rory and Lorelai became the villains to me.
"Just because my dreams are different than yours doesn't mean they're unimportant"
Little women
Let’s not attack girls who don’t like things that aren’t traditionally feminine. It’s fine to be a tomboy or to like sports and not like makeup and things. It’s not ok to trash other women and steal men from other women and change yourself to please a man. And there’s plenty of girls who are super feminine who do that.
They make fun of other women who want to be traditionally feminine and be housewives (like Lindsay)..
Thoughts on the reboot season? I was disgusted in particular with Rory, who became a reliant-on-a-guy hook-up girl with Logan. I felt like her character in particular, but Lorelai's as well, were out-of-character and neither turned out great. I'd expected more, especially with them both being so "special".
@Halloween All Year Round that pissed me off soo bad. why would you do that to someome? just break up with him and let the man go jss
I was really wanting an explanation of why Rory was failing to flourish. In the series they were the cool ones we wanted to be. It's like the veil was lifted and I suddenly saw Lorelei and Rory as a toxic little codependent bubble who don't accomplish anything but make fun of girls who do. I think Rory fell victim to assuming she was special and special things would happen.
I read a theory that the initial run of the show was the book that Rory says she will write on the reboot. That would explain why she's so beloved and gifted in the og show, but pretty unlikable in the reboot.
@@kimallen9452 Omg that's such a cool theory
Jess “I’m not like other boys” Mariano
Yeah I think the concept of the show is feminist but most of the characters are fake feminists. It was sealed for me early on in season3. Remember that one time Rory goes out of her way to bully Jess’s girlfriend. She goes to her place of work and calls her stupid for talking on the phone. I think she even threatens to have her fired. This is all while she’s dating Dean keep in mind. She never apologizes or anything. She always blames the other woman rather than herself or the guy.. yikes.
This is a product of its era, this was really progressive concept at the time. The pick me I’m not like other girls started with good intentions, to highlight to women there were other ways to live your life, that you didn’t HAVE to follow the ‘normal’ way of being a woman you could have independent interests and wants and desires. But as all good intentions it then turned into an us vs them thing. That then progressed into the attitude today of, you can be whatever you want, you like what you want and do what you want and still be a woman. Its like in the 80s/90s the attitude of woman can have it all, career and a family, which was an essential transitional stage between trad wife and now, where we are acknowledging that it’s really hard to have it all and shouldn’t really be the aim, it’s about moderation. In both these examples in society the balance tips a lot in both directions before it settles on a middle ground.
I've felt this same way about Lorelai and Rory's sense of "superiority" when it comes to what other people like, especially other women. On the one hand, I love each of them for who they are and the ways I can relate to their pop culture tastes. On the other hand, I think they are unrelatable to a lot of women in several ways. There are so many women who can't eat the way they do and not face any consequences in their weight or their skin. They like alternative music, mainly classic rock or certain metal genres, but they make fun of the emo music scene of the early 2000s, which was an entire culture that many "normal" or "popular" girls made fun of at the time. All this to just say that the Gilmore girls are such likable characters but in some ways I really think they are hard to relate to. I'm also speaking as a neurodivergent person, so maybe that has some part in it as well.
That one scene where Logan and Rory go out and Logan tells her that "the best part of going to eat with you is the look on people's faces when you order" (I don't remember the exact dialogue. It went something like this) really pissed me off. Tf were the writers trying to convey with that scene?!
Literally been saying this for yeaaaaaars
Ty for posting!!!
🫶🫶🫶
I just hate how Lorelai and Rory constantly think they’re better than other women, because they cheat on their boyfriends
I think they were sneaky "pick-me" girls at various times. They made a few snarky comments about other women, specifically romantic rivals, to the guys they liked. But it was not often or overt. I was glad not to see too much of that, because it wasn't a good look for them.
This
I can answer the why in this - Amy Sherman-Palladino. I think it comes across more in her earlier work than in say Marvellous Mrs Masel, but Amy clearly dislikes "other girls". From being a snob about movies and music, to making sure her leading ladies are set apart because they (unlike other girls) are funny and quirky, her personal individualism definitely seeps into her writing.
There is literally a several episodes where Lorelai questions if she only likes the things she likes cause she was sure her mother would disapprove. Most loudly questioning while discussing her love of pop tarts. She was spiraling about it and all
Sometimes everyone forgets that its not only about what is being said but also who says it. I dont think the showmakers wanted us to agree with everything what a major character says. Why is everyone looking at these characters as role models? For example: Jess mocks Lindsey's music taste, because he is a character who would do that. Not because he is right. When a character says something it tells more about them than what they are talking about.
the fact is that this show was from the early 2000s and back then we all accepted the jokes and didn't think too hard about feminism and mysoginism, it was just a 'cool mom, the uptight daughter and the funny small town people'
I feel like Lorelai is the girl discribed in the infamous cool girl monologue in Gone Girl.
Hahahaha i also thought about the cool girl monologue
Cool video but just so everyone knows(bc i see some commenters mixing them up),a 'pick me' and 'not like other girls' girl are very different breeds(they interlock a lot though)
A pick me:puts other women down for male validation,wants to be chosen(pick me,choose me,love me)
Not like other girls:put other women down so they can feel special/better about themselves,usually are very insecure
Throughout the show I feel they honestly fall into both these categories😂I still adore this show though,juiciest drama I've ever seen
My take is this: I saw another video that talked about how, though the show centers around Rory’s coming of age, it’s really about Lorelei growing up. Part of that growing up was when she realized that so much of her personality was rebellion against her mom. She acknowledges several times in the show that she wants a man and “the whole package.” I think her judgment on other more traditional women was based on her insecurity of not having that and secretly wanting it.
That was her major flaw. The problem Rory had with her development is she enshrined Lorelei so much, that she viewed her flaws as attributes to aspire to. If Lorelei insulted another woman out of insecurity, Rory thought of it as “oh, that is what will make me like my mom who I want to be like.” The thing is, Lorelei ends up growing out of that.
I think it’s funny how there are so many people who think Rory and Lorelai would be swifties bc they don’t like mainstream music and Taylor Swift is mainstream🤣
This is so real. I love this video. And I totally agree.
🫶🫶
i started watching this show for the first time this year, and i can't help but think how every single person in it is more interesting than the gilmore girls
I am so glad I read the comments and realize I’m not the only one who thinks that they are insufferable 😂😂
When I was young I really could eat absolutely everything and stay thin. Then I hit about 35 and had my 3rd child and now I’m twice my ideal weight and nothing seems to drop it.
Thankfully I watched this show as an adult and immediately saw the “pick me” stuff.
The whole “they’re not like other girls! They eat!!” was so tiring.
Love this ❤️ let’s support one another. The fact that we call working for a corporation a true desire and raising children an “adaptive preference” is a rant in itself.
At the end of the day, Rory was a teen, she didnt understand that (in the original series, I won’t ever talk about the reboot)
I don’t think they’re pick me girls at all. Hate me for saying this but, I think that they’re just really pretty privileged girls who got everything they wanted and needed from anyone and everyone whenever it was demanded. So when they don’t get everything their way they lash out. Also to speak on the talk about the size of body , keep in mind this show came out in the early 2000s when no one was as body positive as they are now. There really wasn’t too much recourses or media with plus sized people in it. The early 2000s beauty standards were all about being skinny and fitting into size 0 jeans like those models in the magazines. The show does however show great representation of what it’s like living as someone who didn’t grow up with much or in a non white household. For example Lane with her struggling Asian identity and trying to be the perfect Korean even if born in America , Jess and not having a home and then not having anyone to count on. Especially since racial representation wasn’t as big then as it is now. For the time the show was written I think it was amazing. People today just view it differently because the world’s mindset had change.
Great video ! I completely agree with your analysis on the men's opinion mattering so much more in the series. When you think about it, GG falls short on Its feminist promise (as most "feminist" shows from the 2000s do, like SATC or BTVS). Seeing Rory just waiting for her suitors to fight for her when she should have just walked away has aged rather poorly and is really infuriating. Also, thanks for editiing a "so special" compilation. Didn't the writers know about the "show, don't tell" rule?
I think they know the rule, which is why they showed us they were not that special even though everyone said that. We saw especially Rory realising over and over again that she is not special, there are many people who have just as good grades as her or even better, that she is insecure and jealous to a point were she sleeps with a married man just because she thinks she's sooo special (which she was told all her life) and she can't handle any rejection, romantic or professional.
I've started watching the show this year, I'm almost finishing it, and I can't count how many times I despised Lorelai's or Rory's behavior, they are so full of themselves, it almost feels like a reward seeing Rory failing in the real world as she got older. Emily is my favorite person, at least she's completely honest to herself. Maybe if I had started it 15 years ago I'd think different, but as a woman with almost 30 years, sometimes it is difficult to be empathetic with their silly pretty girls problems
Lorelei was the epitome of sad little rich girl rebel- she was so ungrateful to her parents and where the hell did get the money to open the inn??? My siblings and their friends were obsessed with it so i caught it on tv a lot in my teens. Rory was so smug also. Sorry I had to complain. Lol
@lizziedrucker9586 I totally agree with you, I feel like I watch the show for Luke and Jess only lol
@@lizziedrucker9586 YES, the amount of financial privilege they had bc of emily and richard! They paid for rory's entire education and they kept acting like they were these horrible evil people. Also rory dropping out? that made me so mad, i remember it clearly, bc i always wanted to go to an ivy league when i was small, but i knew i couldn't bc money and then rory just throwing that away
I must disagree, both Richard and Emily are incredibly narcisstic, I can see so much of myself inLorelei in the way the parents are all the trying to gaslight you and guilt trip so can control you. That is shy she ran away. Not to escape marriage but to escape emotional abuse. The parents refuse to listen to her and they nebdr give her any emotional support. All that goes to Rory the golden child.
THE BIBBLE GOT ME DYING 1:00 BAHAHAHHAHAHAH BRO THOUGHT SHE ATE BUT SHE CHOKED ON HER OWN CRUMBS AND DIED
as a queer woman, it makes me super uncomfortable to see how conflated any kind of straying from the strictest of gender roles equates to misogyny. it’s ok to not be like other girls. it’s ok to want to be different. and sports and movies are not inherently masculine. we need to stop gendering everything so much
Fellas, is it too masculine to like entertainment?
What i feel watching the show was also like expecting a fake audience laugh and clap at every sentence, like in old comedy show, sitcoms. Every Time, everything they say is supposed to be noticed and i found it exhausting to be honest.
Also, about the "not like other girls" aspect, I just felt as if their whole personality revolves around that. And beyond that, there's absolutely nothing making these main characters, well, characters. They are the opposite of a personality, and they end up having none.
I feel like it’s kind of a narcissistic fantasy the main character names her daughter after herself (and gives her a ridiculous nick name) then she probably imposes her own abandoned career path to her child, Lorelei is the ideal type to be a reporter but her daughter would best be an introverted writer which is what happens at the end, but she never realises that being that reporter is just not suitable for her personality, some point this out to her time and again except her mom, who probably intended to raise her as her own mini-me
Rory criticised Shane because she was jealous over Jess. She criticised Lane becoming a cheerleader because she felt like they were growing apart after leaving for Chilton. Both cases don't show a general attitude of demeaning feminine things to set themselves separate from them, but emotional situations she was going through.
tbh, I think some of this makes sense.
Since, a part of it is growing up; and we define more and more roles accordingly.
For instance, in middle school, from bullying girls can be sl-t shamed.
But you grow up and realise -- you don't need to do that.
You think when you're younger, that girls have certain roles and interests. And you grow up and realise, there is more.
Like, it doesn't make you more feminine or masculine to like certain things -- and I think the characters realise this. Like, when Lane became a cheerleader and cam be understood (AFAIK) and for Rory's roommate -- it became normal she likes sports.
To be fair, this is also from the perspective of the main characters -- and we see how they experience and accept new things!
That's my opinion.
(But as people, can they be a judge? Yea.)
The show does not hold up except for the ambience of Stars Hollow, which is a cozy setting. Irl, these girls would be too much, specifically Lorelai. She always seems on, and I guess that’s a testament to the actress. But it just screams attention seeker. Rory was never as charismatic but was a breath of fresh air after so much energy from her mom. Rory is definitely a bad amalgamation of her mom and grandparents. Her constant cheating is terrible , especially when she is doing it in the four episode special after the series.
There's absolutely nothing feminist about Gilmore Girls. They were all always terrible people. But we loved them because they were relatable
Really?
Okay, name one anime where the girls/women are more feminist than the Gilmore Girls.
@@saschamayer4050 I’m guessing you’ve never watched an anime in your life other then my hero academia.
“I could never see them putting their friends in uncomfortable embarrassing situations just to gain a man’s affection and attention.” Thue. They never did it for a man. They did it only to validate their own feeling of importance and rightiousness. They’re not “Pick me” girls, but they’re “I pick me, and I expect everyone else do the same, because I’m main character” girls.
I always laugh at how folks think that GG was a feminist show.
they always state that gilmores eat so much but they are still so thin and effortlessly beautiful without sports or diet etc
I think that you should be how you want to be without putting down others I used to not like wearing dresses or makeup but I never put down other girls for it and I was actually put down for it a few times pick mes aren’t always just the tomboys there’s girly ones and tomboy ones (not that that’s what your videos saying in this video I agree with everything you said) I just hate how some people think just because a girl doesn’t like super feminine things that means they’re a pick me now if anyone calls you a pick me because of the things you like they’re actually the real pick me
I couldn't agree with you more! 🫶
Also asp didn't just stop at saying the show had no meaning. It was a reflection of her hatred for millennials and how awful asp apparently is too
I think part of the issue was the writers trying to balance making them humanly flawed characters with them being likable, which may be part of the reason it came out with them seemingly being “special” but also judge mental
Now I dont agree with the social media definition of the pick me girl, which is the "im not like other girls" girl, but gilmore girls does often have that energy with Lorelai and Rory. It's both Lorelai and Rorys thing to be fiercely independent women, which is why the show looks down on women who are the opposite, the traditional housewife who is dependant on a man, particularly Lindsay. Emily is not totally reliant on being a housewife as she does have her own career, where even while Richard is in hospital from his second heart attack she is calling clients. Therefore Emily is somewhat business/ career orientated just like Lorelai and Rory.
I do agree that the treatment of Lindsay was horrible, there was such a lack of empathy for this character and portraying her as shallow. however personally I do not think being a woman like Lindsay, pouring their heart and soul into their man, is beneficial to women as a whole. They also look down on Logans mother, who is basically a Trophy wife. The show has many strong female bonds and friendships which I like about it. And I do think its healthier for women to focus on not necessarily a corporate job but a project that is theirs, that does not involve a man - like Lorelai and Sookie creating their dream inn, Rory's dreams to go to an Ivy League school and do journalism. So I do think the show leans more feminist than pick me, where romantic relationships are very meaningful part of life but so is your dreams and female friendships/bonds. Men are very attracted to the Gilmore girls in the show, and even other ambitious female characters like Paris
Its like the show writers subconsciously believe that men like the strong independent women, and that women who are like this are happier. I do not disagree with this personally, theres more to life than raising children and staying at home in isolation. Linsday stuck around bored at home waiting for Dean to give her his time and attention and Dean trying to work all the time to provide her with a home etc, it is not a healthy relationship dynamic and women need these other aspects of life to be happier and more fulfilled.
Emily doesn't have clients. She cancelled dinner reservations.
You're wrong. Loreali is a girls girl. She's always supportive of all the women in her life, alot of her issues with traditions come from her strained relationship with her mother and the life she grew up with.
The issues Loreali has comes from her inability to teach Rory what's right and wrong, with the fear Rory will run away like she did as a child if she's too firm. Which is an issue as we see Rory never has to confront all the hurt she's out people through, esp Lindsay
No she always bullies people be so fr.
She's supportive of women as long as they're not prettier than her
@@gilmoregirlz-h7j she body shamed half of the characters
@@gilmoregirlz-h7j Rory did a ton Lorelei did some too. An example is the redhead girl who was a fan of paris’s weird old boyfriend they called her “thick thighs” or something
I believe it’s a matter of knowing ourselves…it’s important to know and feel what makes you unique as much as it is important to know and feel what’s similar to oneself with others. I think once one kind of have a glimpse of those extremities it’s a lot more easier to be open to both aspects of life and acknowledge when you are actually different from others be it in qualities, experiences, thought processes, and the likes - and on the other hand acknowledge when you relate with others. Sometimes in life one can be uncomfortable with the former or the latter and there’s nothing wrong with either but it’s a feeling worth navigating. I myself grew up as a people pleaser and in an environment where i observed being extroverted and all bubbly gained a lot of attention and likes… im more introverted growing up… like any human being i also need attention but we often see growing up a very limited view of where we get attention and i kinda interpreted that observation as popularity and being outgoing was the only way meaning i felt i should be more “like the girls” i deemed likable to many guys in our school even that i didn’t practice being in touch with feeling if i really liked things that i was doing or thought to like. I have no sense of self and i crave to feel different and special. But now that i’ve grown up a little more and i’ve gotten to know myself a little more i believe all people have their own uniqueness but we are also similar and related to each other.
It’s okay to relate to others but it’s also important not to lose sight of what makes you unique while doing so, and maybe in doing so we break free from feeling or acting pick me knowing that there may be standards setup in society or our community and it’s cool and good if it aligns with you but also cool and good if you feel it doesn’t. Maybe that’s a sign to be more aligned with what one wants and seek experiences, spaces, and people that you feel you belong. Based on my experience it’s easy to feel like one is going insane or feel invisible sometimes when one is in an incompatible environment because naturally that environment might value something else even though what you offer in and of itself is valuable. that’s why it’s important to know what you value and who you are and acknowledge your similarities and differences with others…because generally we’re all unique like everyone else.
In gilmore girls i think Rory being the main character and highlighting that her different taste among other girls and her “specialness” being liked in the movie is like a reverse card of my experience where special meant being relatable and approachable and bubbly… so that kinda set a subconscious standard in a way and feelings of inferiority when one isn’t like “that girl”.
Nothing wrong with wanting a validation of a man but it’s important to get that with the right kind of man FOR you. I believe it’s a matter of knowing that there are lots of men just like there’s lots of women who have different preferences and that maybe the guys from around you just aren’t the ones for you and who prefers your kind of woman but somewhere someone prefers your kind of woman. So it is important to be your own kind of woman
Also the show debuted in 2000... So let's remember that.
I feel so bad for Lane.
i adore this show with my whole heart, but the gilmore girls are very pick me (not in the sense of trying to not be feminine, but the whole ‘belittling others to seem better than them’ energy RADIATES off of them, especially rory. i feel like they were written to be the girls who are ideal to the male eye. and how they treated other women in the show was very weird, like rory shaming the ballerinas weight and lorelai making a dig at sookie for not going on as many dates as her rubbed me the wrong way. and the way they treated the blonde characters were so weird - like lindsay was cheated on, trash talked for wanting a simple life and not working (when rory didn’t work at all either LOL) and all because she dated a guy who rory happened to date AND fell out with, the show still tried to make her the bad guy. a lot of the “bad” characters in gilmore girls were blonde too, like shane (jess’s “gf”) and paris, i also think that sherry counts because she bleached her hair at one point. i feel like rory and lorelai are kind and genuine people, but they can be very “i’m so different to the standard girl” at times..
@truestmermaid444 Oh my gosh, I thought I was the only one who saw the demonization of blondes in GG! Funny enough, I made a detailed comment regarding this in another GG video titled: The Sexism We Missed in Gilmore Girls: My Autumn Rewatch by Serena Skybourne (if you want to check that out). I wanna post what I wrote here because I have so many examples of this! Now, I am actually naturally blonde myself, and I watched the series because my mom loved it. But rewatching the show, I can’t help but notice how disrespectful the many characters (mostly Lorelai and Rory) are to the lighter haired girls. Many of the females who are blonde in the show are either: Air-headed, slutty, irresponsible, or the typical mean girls.
Louise: One of Paris’s minions (I'd say friend, but realistically, Paris doesn’t go to her or Madeline for true advice or spend time with them outside of school). She really only appears in the Chilton days, but during her screen time, she’s shown to be a slacker in the class, more worried about her appearances and spending time with boys. Heck, during the bangles concert, she and Madeline sneak out to go have fun with older men, not realizing how creepy those guys are. We’re told that she does have good grades, but we’re more so supposed to take the word of the narrative on this one, because most of the time, whenever she is doing projects or homework, she’s not really participating in them and making remarks about sex. Even after the high school arc, we see that she is spending more of her time partying and doing an extended spring break, rather than focusing on school work.
Sherry: Christopher’s ex-wife starts the story off by being this open book, who seems to actually appreciate Chris. She’s kind, tries to get along with the main girls, even willing to spend time with Rory because she wants to make a good impression. Especially if she plans to be her step-mother in the future, which is a refreshing take. We learn that she does want to settle with Chris and wants to have at least two kids. She’s a successful business woman for L'Oréal. But as the series goes on, we hear that Chris and Sherry are having relationship problems. (Once again we have to rely on the narrative’s word because we don’t actually get to see this on screen). When Sherry gets pregnant, Chris rushes to marry her because he wants to be responsible. This results in Lorelai becoming jealous of Sherry, acting like a child by egging Jess’s car, and de-organizing the bathroom in Sherry’s apartment. While this was supposed to seem endearing, it comes off as immature, but we’re supposed to root for Lorelai, even though Chris isn’t with her and that was her choice. Later on, Sherry ends up leaving Chirs to pursue her career in Paris, leaving her daughter with him. This showcases that Sherry has become selfish in wanting to put her work before her marriage. This character development feels more like an assassination, because this goes against Sherry’s character. What started out as this open-minded and accepting woman who wanted a life with Chris and to experience motherhood, suddenly decides to ditch her family in favor of her work. While Sherry was work-driven, she also was shown to be fun and loving. So now, it feels like we are supposed to side with Lorelai in her treatment of Sherry (and even Emily’s distrust for her) because Sherry just abandoned Chris and her daughter, with no real warning or sign of wanting to leave.
Shane: She only appears for the first few episodes of season 3, and she’s only used as a means for Jess to play mind games with Rory. It’s clear right away that Jess doesn’t care about her, only seeing her as a pawn to try and get Rory to break up with Dean. She appears as a slutty girl, who just wants to have a good time with Jess. And in the episode where Lane dyes her hair, Rory is rude to her at the counter. Sure, she was talking on the phone, but Rory constantly bashes her for not doing her job. Even though Rory was the only one in the store, she was buying one thing, and Shane had every right to be upset. Rory constantly puts down Shane, despite not knowing her. And her being upset with Shane being with Jess, only proves to Dean that Rory has feelings for Jess. So Dean breaks up with Rory, which Rory acts hurt over, even though it’s her own fault, but we’re supposed to blame Shane because she was “taking advantage of Jess and she wasn’t a good fit for him” but that shouldn’t have been up for Rory to decide. And after Rory and Jess get together, we never hear of Shane again. Showcasing that she was just used as a pawn, and once she outlived her purpose, she was disposed of.
@truestnernaud444 Here's part two because I couldn't put all of it in one, thank you YT comments!
The Karen squad: On the topic of the episode with Lane dying her hair, in said episode, Lorelai goes to Stars Hollow High School for career day to talk about her work at the Inn. There, kids ask her questions about her being a teen mom. Afterwards, a bunch of the kids' mothers (All blonde mind you) confront Lorelai about how she put ideas into their kids' heads that it’s okay to be a teen parent because Lorelai made it look cool and not difficult. Now, on the one hand, Lorelai was ambushed with all of these questions about her personal life as a teen mom, so she was most likely caught off guard and didn’t know how to give a quick answer right away. On the other hand, she should have expected them to ask questions about her being a teen mom, given that’s how everyone in Stars Hollow knows her as. And Lorelai didn’t exactly handle the situation either. She could have just stated: "Yes, I did have Rory when I was a teen. Yes, it cost me so much in terms of education and a potential better life. But I don’t resent Rory for what happened and I still love her. And my life is pretty cozy, and it worked out. But that doesn’t mean it was easy, I had to bust my ass just to support me and my daughter with a high school diploma and working a minimum wage job at the inn. And it took me so long just to be able to support myself and Rory on my own. Because of that, I don’t believe anyone should have to go through being a teen parent, especially when you have little options. But I also appreciate those teen moms who work hard to support themselves and their kids so their children can grow up in a better life." Lorelai could have just said this and moved on, but then again that would mean she would be a mature woman, which she isn’t. And the moms had a right to be upset, especially if their kids did think being a teen parent was cool, due to how Lorelai portrayed it. Even a Karen can be reasonable once in a while.
Linsey: She was introduced halfway through season three, when Dean is playing hockey and we see he has moved on from Rory. Linsey is the stereotypical feminine woman. She’s attentive to Dean, constantly hugging and kissing him, but isn’t too clingy, and she seems content with wanting to marry him and is happy with being his wife. Sure, she may have arguments with him about not spending time with her, but Dean points out that they need the money to move out and to get a townhouse. We’re told by the narrative that Linsey wants a townhouse, but once again we have to take the word of the story, because we never hear from her if that is what she wants. Dean is also shown to be a hard worker and has the conservative belief to be a breadwinner, so it’s possible this could be his dream rather than hers. But Rory instead blames Linsey for Dean dropping out of college, and for making Dean work so hard. And Linsey is not wrong for wanting Dean to no longer be around Rory, especially when Rory admits she still has feelings for Dean. And when Linsey finds out Dean and Rory had an affair, again, she has every right to be upset. Especially when she was trying to be a supportive wife for Dean by making him brownies and his favorite meal! She literally went to the butcher to learn how to cook roast because she wanted to make Dean happy! And when she confronts Rory about sleeping with Dean, she again has every right to be upset and angry! Rory broke up a marriage (a young one, but still a marriage) but we are made to feel sorry for only Rory, especially when Lorelai defends her daughter saying that they didn’t need to make this public. Linsey becomes the villain in the eyes of Rory, but in reality, Linsey is the victim and Rory is the other woman!
Paris: Unlike most of the other blondes mentioned, Paris is seen as an equal to Rory. She’s hard-working, dedicated, and very academic. But she is also shown to be the mean girl to Rory, belittling and bullying her around. She also has the need for perfectionism, and will not hesitate to tear others down just to win. Like in debates, she constantly mocks Brad to psyche him out so he fumbles in his presentations. She also gaslights Rory at times during the bi-centinal speech competition by calling Rory out for trying to play mind games with her, when Paris was doing the same thing. While Paris does grow as a character over the course of the series, she still has those terrible flaws of using others to get what she wants and will oftentimes push Rory aside to make herself look better. (Also, I find it a bit off that Rory has a better friendship with Paris, her high school bully, over the course of the series than she does with Lane, who is supposed to be her childhood friend. Like I’m pretty sure Rory has more screen time with Paris than with Lane. Really think about that.)
Now, is it possible that Amy didn’t realize her bias to blonde people? Maybe, but again the pattern is too hard to ignore. Lots of the female characters that are blonde are often demonized throughout Gilmore Girls. And considering ASP was trying out the “cool girl, not like other girls” troupe, her bringing down the feminine side of women wouldn’t be out of the question. Especially considering this is a common theme with this troupe, where the said Not like other girls, will often vilify or demonize others of the feminine side to make them look more desirable. Again, as a blonde myself, I do feel a bit insecure whenever I look back at this series and the treatment of said light-haired characters. Because it makes me feel like I should be that way due to being a blonde. I also wouldn’t be surprised if other girls with blonde hair have some self-esteem issues after watching this series, because they have been painted as these terrible people due to the presentation of the show. It’s really sad because some female icons like Barbie and She-ra are blondes, but they aren’t the ones putting down their friends just because they don’t look like them!
I’ve never heard of a “pick me” girl before so thanks for educating. I was more of an outcast in school but I always loved the show because the age gap between my mother & i is the same as lorelai & Rory
I think the biggest misconception about feminism is that it's about women being able to chose. It's not about that, that comes later, after the fight to have equal rights, which is what feminism is, a fight for rights and against discrimination towards women
Only considering that if they eat all the trashy food they do during the serie, they would probably not be skinnies or would end up in the hospital. This certainly is very pick me fantasy.
I can eat a lot and not gain that much weight but if I ate that way, a quick blood test probably would show I was unhealthy