How to Heal Abandonment Issues (with Gabor Maté)

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  • Опубликовано: 20 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 86

  • @mariellarobles3372
    @mariellarobles3372 5 месяцев назад +34

    From the age of 12 till the age of 19 my mom was not a part of my life I had told my dad that her brother in law molested me and she called me a liar and slapped me. I distanced myself from her and she disappeared from our lives for 7 years during that time I helped my dad care for my siblings. My dad remarried and his wife was not loving to us and I moved out and rarely talked to him once he remarried. My mom defended my child molester till his death. Adapting to trauma was a way of life for me. My sister became an alcoholic and homeless and that was another blow to deal with and she had a accident and ended up with a traumatic brain injury and she passed away in 2018. My parents weren't very helpful after her accident. All this pain was unbearable. I don't think deep trauma goes away.I tried to spare my kids as much as possible.

    • @funkibloo3811
      @funkibloo3811 5 месяцев назад +13

      I'm so sorry...

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад +12

      I'm so sorry for all you've been through. It’s incredibly brave of you to share your story. The pain you've faced, from your mom's actions to losing your sister, is unimaginable. It’s understandable that you feel deep trauma doesn't just go away. Your strength in caring for your siblings and trying to protect your own kids is truly admirable. Please remember, it's okay to seek support and take care of yourself. You deserve healing and peace.

    • @mariellarobles3372
      @mariellarobles3372 5 месяцев назад +11

      @@yourinnerchildmatters thank you I am working through all the negative issues in my life to lighten my heart and mind I feel I am recovering on a daily 💜🌼💐

    • @mariellarobles3372
      @mariellarobles3372 5 месяцев назад +6

      @@funkibloo3811 thanks for your compassion 💐

    • @yourconnection9303
      @yourconnection9303 5 месяцев назад +5

      I wish you healing and strength.❣️

  • @annieg1812
    @annieg1812 19 дней назад +1

    Thank you Gabor Maté...as soon as mention "wanted by making yourself needed they may not want me but they're going to need me and I'm available.. and never said no...workaholic..Im wanted and needed "...burst into tears...

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  18 дней назад +1

      It's incredible how Gabor Maté's words resonate with so many of us. Finding that balance between being needed and knowing our worth is such an important journey.

  • @PaigeSquared
    @PaigeSquared 5 месяцев назад +19

    I tried to tell my ex husband how important it was that he is kind, in front of our child. He would not take it seriously. So now he is my ex husband. Our children are the furture. Safety and love are the bare minimum, not some extra cherry on top for the specially privileged.

    • @kathleendinsmore7588
      @kathleendinsmore7588 5 месяцев назад +3

      What you say is so true!

    • @earthsign7568
      @earthsign7568 5 месяцев назад +3

      good job! Priorities.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад +3

      I appreciate your commitment to ensuring a safe and loving environment for your children. They deserve the best.

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 5 месяцев назад

      Stop calling him psychologist...it is a LIE!​@@yourinnerchildmatters

  • @outnow333
    @outnow333 3 месяца назад +3

    This man is the first person whose insight, knowledge and intuitive wisdom has helped me come to know and heal the broken parts of myself ....from my healed heart I thank you Gabor Mate 🙏 💖

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  3 месяца назад

      Thank you for sharing this beautiful message! It’s inspiring to see how Gabor Mate’s work resonates with so many people and helps them he

  • @iloveyoufromthedepthofmyheart
    @iloveyoufromthedepthofmyheart 2 месяца назад +3

    And also he misrepresents narcissism. Narcissists can also be made by overly spoiling the child, putting him/her on a pedestal, not just by neglecting their needs.

  • @bingoandtoto
    @bingoandtoto 3 месяца назад +1

    your contents are so focusing on the point. SOOOOOO helpful. Thanks, dear.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  2 месяца назад

      Thank you so much for your kind words! It means a lot to know the content is making a difference for you!

  • @josephtein3835
    @josephtein3835 2 месяца назад

    I've heard many talks by Gabor and have learned a lot from him. These insights I've gained make me think that the incident of being given away by his mother when he was a baby cannot be the only traumatic experience that traumatized him and affected his addictions, workaholism, rage and ADHD that he describes (so honestly and openly) in his talks. Did his parents meet all of his needs for bonding and authentic feeling expression during the rest of his growing up? Probably not if they were like the average traumatized members of their community. In his talks about Israel, Gabor mentions that his father threw him out of the house for writing an article that he didn't approve of. Is this unconditional acceptance of Gabor's authentic self-expression? Not exactly. Probably a pattern that operated on some level during Gabor's growing up, not necessarily leading to being kicked out of the house each time. I've learned a lot from listening to Gabor's talk which has helped me to see how my parents limited my own self-expression ... as well as helping me understand them and not resenting them any longer for what they unknowingly did.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  2 месяца назад +1

      Thank you for sharing your reflections on Dr Gabor's talks. It's profound how our upbringing shapes our experiences and understanding. Your insights about parental relationships and self-expression are really valuable.

    • @josephtein3835
      @josephtein3835 2 месяца назад

      @@yourinnerchildmatters And I appreciate your attention and response!

  • @carabanana3938
    @carabanana3938 3 месяца назад +1

    Just love gabor . I could listen to him all day 😊

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  3 месяца назад

      Thank you so much for your kind words! It means a lot to know you’re enjoying Dr Gabor’s insights!

  • @gabrielmackay5749
    @gabrielmackay5749 4 месяца назад +2

    Thank you for this ❤

  • @RichaChauhandreams
    @RichaChauhandreams 3 месяца назад

    This is the story of my life so far🙏🙏 Thank you Dr Mate , i can have a fresh perspective Now ❤

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  3 месяца назад

      Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It's amazing to hear that the video resonated with you and helped you see things differently.

  • @earthsign7568
    @earthsign7568 5 месяцев назад +16

    If you were abandoned as an infant ie. left in your crib for hours alone, not held, touched, rocked or soothed, then this would have been life threatening and you will feel it deeper than 'emotional pain.'

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад +1

      Thank you for sharing your insight on the deep effects of early childhood experiences.

    • @PaigeSquared
      @PaigeSquared 5 месяцев назад +1

      Emotional pain can feel like life or death

    • @earthsign7568
      @earthsign7568 5 месяцев назад +2

      @@PaigeSquared That may be the case but people need to understand the difference btwn. abandonment that IS life threatening vs. that which is not.

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад +2

      That's what happened to me...I had to fight for my survival...and this feeling never goes away.

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад

      ​@@earthsign7568for an infant it would be life threatening

  • @lovesings2us
    @lovesings2us 5 месяцев назад +19

    This is quite interesting and helpful to me. Thank you. At the same time, it's not really about "how to heal from deep abandonment pain," which is the title. It's about what causes that sort of pain. Is there a video with Dr Gabor that's mostly focussed on how to heal from deep abandonment pain? If so, I'd love to know the name of the video. Thank you.

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад

      No, he hasn't healed himself, so cannot tell us how to heal.

    • @Simplesimple123
      @Simplesimple123 4 месяца назад

      @@robynhope219how do you know

    • @venanziocalise946
      @venanziocalise946 3 месяца назад

      Various therapies and a change needed in society is needed.

  • @scottmckenna9164
    @scottmckenna9164 5 месяцев назад +7

    Thank you, thank you, thank you!

  • @allisonewens4036
    @allisonewens4036 5 месяцев назад +2

    Powerful reminder of attachment needs and the importance of knowing this in my own life been life changing and so healing for me ❤❤

  • @ElevatedVibration11
    @ElevatedVibration11 5 месяцев назад +4

    Thanks 🙏

  • @robynhope219
    @robynhope219 2 месяца назад +1

    I'd like to know if Gabe overcame his abandonment issues...bc if he still talks about it, he didnt.

    • @bridgetbrown8123
      @bridgetbrown8123 2 месяца назад

      To help others?

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 2 месяца назад

      @@bridgetbrown8123 He is not actually helping...he is just talking about issues.

  • @samueltekalign4919
    @samueltekalign4919 4 месяца назад +1

    Thank you!

  • @funkibloo3811
    @funkibloo3811 5 месяцев назад +4

    Thank you. ❤

  • @Catweazle2
    @Catweazle2 5 месяцев назад +3

    Herzlichen Dank!

  • @ianmack5068
    @ianmack5068 5 месяцев назад +4

    Great insights and profound thoughts right here

  • @iloveyoufromthedepthofmyheart
    @iloveyoufromthedepthofmyheart 2 месяца назад +2

    He didn't said HOW to heal it? Or did I miss it?

    • @BA-ei7tl
      @BA-ei7tl 21 день назад

      Grieve it. To heal it.

  • @earthsign7568
    @earthsign7568 4 месяца назад +1

    "Memory is energy" -Altered States, the movie.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  4 месяца назад

      Thanks for sharing that quote, it's definitely thought-provoking.

  • @KsK-p7o
    @KsK-p7o 4 месяца назад +1

    💖

  • @annetteroick6406
    @annetteroick6406 4 месяца назад +4

    And how to heal this pain please? This is the important question and not solved in the Video! ???

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад +1

      Of course it isn't. He dances around issues without solving any.

    • @cabecass
      @cabecass 3 месяца назад +2

      You hold space for the difficult emotion and reparent the inner child by giving it what it needs in that moment.

    • @cabecass
      @cabecass 3 месяца назад

      There are some inner child meditations on here that are really helpful.

    • @annetteroick6406
      @annetteroick6406 Месяц назад

      @@cabecass thank you so much for your answer !!!

  • @yourinnerchildmatters
    @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад +7

    In this powerful video, renowned psychologist Dr. Gabor Maté shares his insights on healing deep abandonment issues. He delves into the root causes of these issues and offers practical techniques for building resilience and finding inner peace. If you or someone you know struggles with abandonment issues, this video is a must-watch. Dr. Maté's expert perspectives on psychology and health education will provide valuable insights and actionable advice for overcoming these challenges. Don't miss out on this transformative discussion!
    #DrGaborMaté, #ChildhoodTrauma, #AbandonmentIssues, #AbandonmentTrauma, #InnerHealing, #Resilience, #Mindfulness, #AttachmentTheory, #EmotionalWellBeing, #ImplicitMemories

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 5 месяцев назад

      STOP calling him psychologist..he is a retired GP with an interest in psychology.

  • @earthsign7568
    @earthsign7568 5 месяцев назад +3

    ruclips.net/video/YLk60S9-_D0/видео.html
    Bessel Van Der Kolk: Your Body Keeps The Score (holds the trauma/shock)

  • @zovalentine7305
    @zovalentine7305 5 месяцев назад +5

    NOW is the best time
    The past is gone
    The future is not here

    • @earthsign7568
      @earthsign7568 5 месяцев назад +3

      The past is NOT gone in childhood survivors of neglect/brutality. It's in you, your body and soul until and if you can heal. Yours is a dangerous, naive and trite attitude that gets survivors into a lot of trouble.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад +1

      Thank you for the reminder to live in the present and make the most of every moment.

    • @yourinnerchildmatters
      @yourinnerchildmatters  5 месяцев назад

      Thank you for sharing your perspective. It's important to acknowledge the lasting effects of neglect and brutality and work towards healing.

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад

      She is always trite!​@@earthsign7568

    • @robynhope219
      @robynhope219 4 месяца назад

      ​@@earthsign7568👍👍👍👍👍👍

  • @zovalentine7305
    @zovalentine7305 5 месяцев назад +3

    Gabor Mate MD PhD CM ❤

  • @lillimay5
    @lillimay5 2 месяца назад +1

    Seems trauma informed. Nice music going along and then hits you with unnecessary political trauma in min 3. This isn’t enlightenment.

  • @Lynn-jl2yz
    @Lynn-jl2yz 5 месяцев назад +6

    pls quit the political commentary and stick to childhood trauma!!!!

  • @susanwiltshire1458
    @susanwiltshire1458 4 месяца назад +2

    That's untrue I don't trust this man

    • @venanziocalise946
      @venanziocalise946 3 месяца назад +1

      What are you talking about?

    • @anthonymalgas260
      @anthonymalgas260 3 месяца назад +1

      If he is just scroll on and listen to something that's according to your view is true.