Many years ago children were expected to be seen and not heard. No one discusses this today. We were like ghosts who had to quietly smile and endure all types of abandonment and abuse. We had to quietly exist to make our parents and families look good. We had to exist quietly to survive to keep things stable not to make waves. The feeling of not being safe in your own bed as a child leaves lasting scars. Scapegoats know this very well. If they complained society would turn against them and they would once again become victims. To learn at a very young age that you cannot even trust your parents is very difficult way to begin life.I am in my 70's and still dealing with many health problems due to a troubled past. I am still in the process of learning and healing. Dr. Mate's different perspective has helped me immensely. I am forever grateful.
yes...they were different times. Children were extentions of parents and there to enhance their lives, and I always felt like a burden and a chore to my parents.
Judy - I really empathize. I too experienced this, as well as lots of abuse and traumatic experiences as an adult. I'm almost 50 and have been trying to heal for the last 22 years, whilst still struggling (my whole life with anxiety). I wish you wellness and joy, and sending you love (((🩷)))
@@judyvadillo9162 TY for this comment. I am 63 yrs old. In Jan. Of this year my mother passed. It has put me in a space where I feel like a child again in a brand new world where no parents are left to please by holding in my feelings and being quiet. I loved my Mom and miss her but never realized how I was never taught to love myself or how to express my feelings and feel safe about it. So at 63 yrs old I have many shadows coming up that I am seeing , feeling and then releasing. I too am doing the work and am excited to BeMe now without holding back 😊💕
I have so much suppressed painful emotions. I feel like I’m facing death at times with the pain that I feel. But that’s how my inner child felt when I was being s/a by my dad 😢 felt like I was dying.
Then you were probably more attached to someone other than your parents, which is why you could afford having conflicts with them. Children with no one but their parents to rely on have to suppress emotions in order to survive
I live with that stress because I always jump at the slightest thing. I am hypervigilant and have probably been that way as long as I can remember. 'Tuning out" is similar to when someone has epilepsy. Louise Hay says it is 'Running away from the family".
I live in a narcissistic relationship. 2 years ago I said enough! and I do my will. but I suppress all my emotions, likes and dislikes to avoid arguing with my partner. A few months ago I developed breast cancer, even though I am a very healthy woman. Your explanation might be the answer?
I am so glad you are speaking the Truth about cancer,Thank You I agree. I got sick when my husband got another woman pregnant. I did my inner work along with Chinese medicine and I was cured.
I decided to not beg for my parents love . I learnt by watching my sister climb onto Mum wanting contact . I felt she was brave enough to make an effort. Her effort short, Before she was separated . I was 4 and could see my mother had no time for us . No time to cuddle and play .
@carriecastanos Do you have animals? This is a great way to give and revieve affection. In addition, animals are different from humans in that they are far more accepting, don't judge (well if they do we don't hear or sense it), and are always genuinely happy to see you. The soft fur is a good relaxant for me. I sleep better when my dog is behind my legs at night. My days are more enjoyable when my cat or dog talks to me. Animals don't come with all the negativity and ups and downs of emotions. They stay pretty consistent. Where as humans are all over the place, which complicates the mental and physical process of affection, love, etc. Since opening my home again to animals I have been less depressed and less anxiety. If money or commitment is a problem, another option is fostering an animal. It's a great experience with very little commitment(like you can back out of it with no consequences to you) and no cost involved (well except for the time, gas, and water for caring for them. Super minimal if you ask me). Depending on the amount of commitment and experience you want to get out of it, each animals situation is different. Kittens come with energy and chaos. Mama's to be come with the birthing experience. Other animals have Healthcare needs, such as needing fluids daily/special diet. Puppies require socialization, cuddles and potty training. Other animals come across as a roommate situation, and only come out at night, very quietly, because their terrified of socialization, love, and affection from the big stinky loud human, lol. It's just an option. I recently learned.... "The purpose of life is make good memories."
I suppress my emotions. They are currently stuck inside me in the form of a flare of ulcerative colitis. It makes me scared and angry. It never ends. 😢
@@perhagman6112 there is hope for you. Check out Joe Dispenzas work, but also and foremost as the base for knowledge and cure for chronic conditions : Dr. Sarno and Dr. Schubiner. ♥️♥️♥️ Also the recovery coaches for CFS In all the circumstances, you have to put all your symptoms under the umbrella of "pain" or "fatigue" and the methods will affect you as well, bc the underlying language is emotions.
I agree with Gabor Mate about the serious problem with suppressing our emotions. Our physical health is very much influenced by our emotional health & feelings. A new medical health model needs to be created to include emotions, our emotional past & present & a comprehensive holistic way of looking at each unique individual. Western Medicine objectifies their patients with tests & drugs. What is needed is to see each patient as the subject of their own lives whose feelings offer pivotal clues about their health.
It’s smart to suppress your emotions in a lot of situations. Otherwise, you’ll find yourself engaging in road rage, inappropriately complimenting anyone you find attractive, getting into bar fights, laughing at the worst times. Keeping things in is a smart way to survive and be a part of society.
What you are talking about is choosing not to act upon the emotion that you feel. There is nothing wrong with that, moreover often times it's necessary, but that is not suppression.
I’ve been looking for part 2 of this video series, but am unable to find it. If it’s the next video that plays it’s completely different. If not, could you please add part to to play immediately after this or put a link or somehow define which video is the correct part 2 because I really want to see that! Thanks! Keep the good stuff coming.
I cant belive it, my whole life thinking i was insane, but i knew it, iknew it from the bottom my soul i was right, something deeply profound was wrong with my family and the way iwas treated developed my asmha, i knew it i dont know what toy say, im just speechless.
Emotions Joy , love, pain physical, pain phycological, anxiety, Experience of abuse emotionally and physically. Pain is something your mind and body remember. Adjusting to carrying weight in deep unseen scarring .
I am positive that emotional suppression for as long as I remember has so much to do with my current illness, which is threatening my mobility and everything else in my life I’m 69 years old is it too late for me?
Only if YOU believe it’s too late. Just asking others if it is too late shows that you are looking for outside approval still. Anyway, that is just how I see it and hope that helps you. I am 63 and working on seeing my own setbacks that keep me from being the free spirit that I was born to be too. ❤️
I enjoy this content, but in the future, please remove the secondary commentary. I'm here to listen to Mate. Anything else will lead me away from the channel. Thanks for the video
I respect Dr. Mate emensly. (sp?) However I did not hear anything about how to release the emotions trapped inside. I find the title misleading and not helpful.
@leanne123 I've listened to several interviews, and it's about doing something new and healthy to love yourself . From everything I've gatherd from him and others is that it's all about new nero pathways making a new link in our mind and soul. Our electric system is a road map and if it keeps firing in the same direction, it builds that road stronger. It needs to bridge off to the " love yourself, forgive yourself direction " so when your in a funk do something incredibly new and different, keep doing it to build a new frequency road . The neurons make fireworks and blow up the rocks that blocked those pathways of new thoughts from emerging. Consistency to make the road stronger like the depression road but it's a positive road instead.
Where is the releasing of emotions in this advice. This feels like a reddit non-answer. I can give the original poster a more direct answer but this isn't a 1:1 way: Being aware of the signals your body/feelings/emotions tries to send and try to learn not to judge them. Meditate during moments of distress/anger/negative feelings as it can help you being more aware of them. Physical exercise apparently helps with repressed anger to some extent, more directly weight lifting. Learn how to spot when you are supressing. It's a paradox but being aware of how one usually reacts might give you cues as to how your body feels internally. I have repressed anger from abuse and my cue was irritability and judging.
Let’s start a March Dr.Gabor ! For the children who suffer from stress bc of kids who are troubled ! It’s horrible in the schools in the US.. I work as a speech pathologist and work in a low socio economic status and every child suffers ! It’s horrible and I want to change jobs and go back into the medical field bc we can’t change kids bc the parents won’t change and in denial!!!! It’s a broken Society !! What can America do to stop the cycle Dr , Gabor ?! Your so brilliant to bring this country to the surface and we need to stop it now 🎉😮🩵🫶❤️🩹
This talk should be handed out to every human being on the planet ❣️
Many years ago children were expected to be seen and not heard. No one discusses this today. We were like ghosts who had to quietly smile and endure all types of abandonment and abuse. We had to quietly exist to make our parents and families look good. We had to exist quietly to survive to keep things stable not to make waves. The feeling of not being safe in your own bed as a child leaves lasting scars. Scapegoats know this very well. If they complained society would turn against them and they would once again become victims. To learn at a very young age that you cannot even trust your parents is very difficult way to begin life.I am in my 70's and still dealing with many health problems due to a troubled past. I am still in the process of learning and healing. Dr. Mate's different perspective has helped me immensely. I am forever grateful.
yes...they were different times. Children were extentions of parents and there to enhance their lives, and I always felt like a burden and a chore to my parents.
Judy - I really empathize. I too experienced this, as well as lots of abuse and traumatic experiences as an adult. I'm almost 50 and have been trying to heal for the last 22 years, whilst still struggling (my whole life with anxiety). I wish you wellness and joy, and sending you love (((🩷)))
@@judyvadillo9162 Your story is very much like my own. I hope we both heal.
@@judyvadillo9162 TY for this comment. I am 63 yrs old. In Jan. Of this year my mother passed. It has put me in a space where I feel like a child again in a brand new world where no parents are left to please by holding in my feelings and being quiet. I loved my Mom and miss her but never realized how I was never taught to love myself or how to express my feelings and feel safe about it. So at 63 yrs old I have many shadows coming up that I am seeing , feeling and then releasing. I too am doing the work and am excited to BeMe now without holding back 😊💕
Sometimes I feel like we humans are still in the stone age when it comes to emotions, humanity etc It's a thing that allure most, not an emotion.
I have so much suppressed painful emotions. I feel like I’m facing death at times with the pain that I feel. But that’s how my inner child felt when I was being s/a by my dad 😢 felt like I was dying.
Dr. Mate, I love you. You are a great human being !
This popped up just at the right time. Dealing with oppressed emotions from childhood. Going thru healing now.
Actually, emotional suppression is not one of my problems...i have cried, even screamed when my parents abused me. This helped me survive.
Absolutely. It serves a purpose but it should be a temporary solution. Not permanent.
@@NightsideOfParadise it was permanent until mother died, then everything changed.
@@robynhope219 I scream into pillows😁
Then you were probably more attached to someone other than your parents, which is why you could afford having conflicts with them. Children with no one but their parents to rely on have to suppress emotions in order to survive
@@suave5692 I had a teacher who had a girl crush on me...other small incidents that lifted my spirits, but no one saved me from the hell I was in ☹️
❤ Dr Mate. Learn so much from you. So much compassion.
I live with that stress because I always jump at the slightest thing. I am hypervigilant and have probably been that way as long as I can remember. 'Tuning out" is similar to when someone has epilepsy. Louise Hay says it is 'Running away from the family".
I live in a narcissistic relationship. 2 years ago I said enough! and I do my will. but I suppress all my emotions, likes and dislikes to avoid arguing with my partner. A few months ago I developed breast cancer, even though I am a very healthy woman. Your explanation might be the answer?
How are you? Sending positive vibes, I suppress my emotions too, I'm just out a narcisstic situation, I was ill with it, I scream into pillows now😊
@@carriecastanos 🥹🌹🙏🏻💗
I am so glad you are speaking the Truth about cancer,Thank You I agree. I got sick when my husband got another woman pregnant. I did my inner work along with Chinese medicine and I was cured.
its about seeking connection..even though if its brief. it all boils down to attachment theory. amazing isnt it?
I decided to not beg for my parents love .
I learnt by watching my sister climb onto Mum wanting contact .
I felt she was brave enough to make an effort.
Her effort short,
Before she was separated .
I was 4 and could see my mother had no time for us .
No time to cuddle and play .
I got no cuddles either, I've been alone for years, I scream into pillows now to get things of my chest
@carriecastanos
Do you have animals? This is a great way to give and revieve affection. In addition, animals are different from humans in that they are far more accepting, don't judge (well if they do we don't hear or sense it), and are always genuinely happy to see you. The soft fur is a good relaxant for me. I sleep better when my dog is behind my legs at night. My days are more enjoyable when my cat or dog talks to me. Animals don't come with all the negativity and ups and downs of emotions. They stay pretty consistent. Where as humans are all over the place, which complicates the mental and physical process of affection, love, etc.
Since opening my home again to animals I have been less depressed and less anxiety.
If money or commitment is a problem, another option is fostering an animal. It's a great experience with very little commitment(like you can back out of it with no consequences to you) and no cost involved (well except for the time, gas, and water for caring for them. Super minimal if you ask me). Depending on the amount of commitment and experience you want to get out of it, each animals situation is different. Kittens come with energy and chaos. Mama's to be come with the birthing experience. Other animals have Healthcare needs, such as needing fluids daily/special diet. Puppies require socialization, cuddles and potty training. Other animals come across as a roommate situation, and only come out at night, very quietly, because their terrified of socialization, love, and affection from the big stinky loud human, lol.
It's just an option.
I recently learned....
"The purpose of life is make good memories."
Dr Matte u understand hugs to u forever thank you for all you have given❤
I suppress my emotions. They are currently stuck inside me in the form of a flare of ulcerative colitis. It makes me scared and angry. It never ends. 😢
@@perhagman6112 there is hope for you. Check out Joe Dispenzas work, but also and foremost as the base for knowledge and cure for chronic conditions : Dr. Sarno and Dr. Schubiner. ♥️♥️♥️
Also the recovery coaches for CFS
In all the circumstances, you have to put all your symptoms under the umbrella of "pain" or "fatigue" and the methods will affect you as well, bc the underlying language is emotions.
Screaming into pillows is good, my first scream was a puny one but they got stronger, I feel its good for me.
World of support!! Thanks for sharing this great knowledge
I agree with Gabor Mate about the serious problem with suppressing our emotions. Our physical health is very much influenced by our emotional health & feelings. A new medical health model needs to be created to include emotions, our emotional past & present & a comprehensive holistic way of looking at each unique individual. Western Medicine objectifies their patients with tests & drugs. What is needed is to see each patient as the subject of their own lives whose feelings offer pivotal clues about their health.
"The suppression of emotion is an adaptive response. adaptive response. adaptive response.
Not to the person doing the suppression. It is adaptive to society, but maladaptive you your body.
The Socrates of our day !!! Wise and wonderful !!!❤🎉 ty for your wisdom and love for the universe !
It’s smart to suppress your emotions in a lot of situations. Otherwise, you’ll find yourself engaging in road rage, inappropriately complimenting anyone you find attractive, getting into bar fights, laughing at the worst times.
Keeping things in is a smart way to survive and be a part of society.
@@robbiepeterh what does that tell you about society?
@@Little.R 💯
What you are talking about is choosing not to act upon the emotion that you feel. There is nothing wrong with that, moreover often times it's necessary, but that is not suppression.
Attachment style is so important
I’ve been looking for part 2 of this video series, but am unable to find it. If it’s the next video that plays it’s completely different. If not, could you please add part to to play immediately after this or put a link or somehow define which video is the correct part 2 because I really want to see that! Thanks! Keep the good stuff coming.
I can't imagine the size of trauma in so many kids in Palestina.
I cant belive it, my whole life thinking i was insane, but i knew it, iknew it from the bottom my soul i was right, something deeply profound was wrong with my family and the way iwas treated developed my asmha, i knew it i dont know what toy say, im just speechless.
I love you too Dr Matte❤
I think we know this at some level, but we suppress that to cope. We are our biggest challenge.
This happened to me and it literally ruined my life.
Brilliant
After my burnout i took decision of expressing my bad emotions at work and with everybody
Emotions
Joy , love, pain physical, pain phycological, anxiety,
Experience of abuse emotionally and physically.
Pain is something your mind and body remember.
Adjusting to carrying weight in deep unseen scarring .
I have learnt to hug with true feelings.
I can understand and love what I love to understand and appreciate
The love I have
Could you tell me what song and artist played at the end? Thank you
Amen!!
there has been a what and a why in this video. but still hasn't there been a "how to break free from emotional suppression".
I am positive that emotional suppression for as long as I remember has so much to do with my current illness, which is threatening my mobility and everything else in my life I’m 69 years old is it too late for me?
Only if YOU believe it’s too late. Just asking others if it is too late shows that you are looking for outside approval still. Anyway, that is just how I see it and hope that helps you. I am 63 and working on seeing my own setbacks that keep me from being the free spirit that I was born to be too. ❤️
Where can we find the original video of Dr Mate's talk? What is it called?
I enjoy this content, but in the future, please remove the secondary commentary. I'm here to listen to Mate. Anything else will lead me away from the channel. Thanks for the video
Misleading to earn??
Serenity now !!!😂😂😂
@@kimlec3592 yes yes Seinfeld
@@Coco-fi4mv Yes...serenity now...Serenity...now...
Yeah, just another lecture with tons of Information.
The unnecessary comments ruin the videos for me
Why is the lady talking over this?
🌟🗽🫶
Matè infaticabile
what i can say sexual instinct most dangerous thing from nature to the human as sach
Nah just evil people doing evil things to other evil people.
Is this AI voice. Sounds annoying
I respect Dr. Mate emensly. (sp?) However I did not hear anything about how to release the emotions trapped inside. I find the title misleading and not helpful.
@leanne123 I've listened to several interviews, and it's about doing something new and healthy to love yourself . From everything I've gatherd from him and others is that it's all about new nero pathways making a new link in our mind and soul. Our electric system is a road map and if it keeps firing in the same direction, it builds that road stronger. It needs to bridge off to the " love yourself, forgive yourself direction " so when your in a funk do something incredibly new and different, keep doing it to build a new frequency road . The neurons make fireworks and blow up the rocks that blocked those pathways of new thoughts from emerging. Consistency to make the road stronger like the depression road but it's a positive road instead.
Where is the releasing of emotions in this advice. This feels like a reddit non-answer.
I can give the original poster a more direct answer but this isn't a 1:1 way: Being aware of the signals your body/feelings/emotions tries to send and try to learn not to judge them.
Meditate during moments of distress/anger/negative feelings as it can help you being more aware of them.
Physical exercise apparently helps with repressed anger to some extent, more directly weight lifting.
Learn how to spot when you are supressing. It's a paradox but being aware of how one usually reacts might give you cues as to how your body feels internally. I have repressed anger from abuse and my cue was irritability and judging.
Let’s start a March Dr.Gabor ! For the children who suffer from stress bc of kids who are troubled ! It’s horrible in the schools in the US.. I work as a speech pathologist and work in a low socio economic status and every child suffers ! It’s horrible and I want to change jobs and go back into the medical field bc we can’t change kids bc the parents won’t change and in denial!!!! It’s a broken Society !! What can America do to stop the cycle Dr , Gabor ?! Your so brilliant to bring this country to the surface and we need to stop it now 🎉😮🩵🫶❤️🩹