When Someone we love has died
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- Опубликовано: 14 окт 2024
- The death of a loved one is pretty much the saddest thing that can befall us. The French 16th century philosopher Montaigne once wrote: 'To philosophise is to learn to die.' Here are a set of the School of Life's darkest but most consoling thoughts on death.
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“Someone we loved so much has died. It can be hard to know where to turn. For religions, dying was regarded as an essential, immensely important, part of existence; it was supposed to happen at a time appointed by God or by fate. It was not an embarrassing or despair-inducing end point, it was a transformation: the soul would continue its life in another form or in another place. Those who died had only ‘departed’ and lived on elsewhere. Perhaps after our own death, our souls would be reunited with theirs.”
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#TheSchoolOfLife #Loss #CopingWithDeath
My best friend died a couple of weeks ago and I know that when I cry it's not for him but for me, I'm mourning for the life we could have shared together.
Kane Danaher my favourite quote is from Khalil Gibran from ‘The Prophet’ ‘When you are sad, look again in your heart and see that that for which you now weep was once the source of your delight’. You have it exactly. And therein lies your key to recovery. Celebrate what you did share because the future could be anything - only this moment in time exists. xx
Same here with my dad. I think we tend to think what they’re gonna miss so many things in our life. We think how we wished they could be here through all of it: Weddings, births, even grief. But they won’t, and it’s the hardest thing ever
True! My best friend is my wife.
same
Kane Danaher
Holidays are hard after you lose a
Loved one . I discuss this and more in this video ruclips.net/video/nm3k3Q60STU/видео.html
My mom died just under a month ago, at 53. While I often put on a happy face around people at my college, deep down I am still suffering.
spacekiller9 May she rest in peace
Rip... Hope shes in heaven.
Same here her age is 54😭😭
My mom passed away November 21 2019 and i can't even explain how this has affected me she was my everything we were sooo close i cant accepted this loss i just cant!!! 😔😩🥺
Im Sorry for your loss i hope you can find a way to cure your heart i tend to believe i will see my mom again but nothing is promised in this life not even her😔
We'll never be able to love them enough, so love them enough when they're still alive.
Deep af
my grandfather got a heart attack this morning and died... :(
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
Yeah we try but sometimes the death is unexpected and it's so terribly frustrating
She just died
Lost my dad this year , so true he is immortal as long as I am alive ...
"It is frightening to die but not frightening to be dead" true wisdom.
Thanks for the video, was much needed .
May you have all the strength and wisdom you need
@@mimikarassane6791 thank you
Sumit I lost my dad this year too
@@ao4698 god give you the strength to cope with the loss, losing a parent is the worst :(
I ain't handling it too well but someday down the line things will be fine as life goes on, or so is the hope .
Take good care Amelia
You're right this video was much needed. I lost my father this year too!
Hope you're doing better now, death takes a lot from you but somehow I'm left feeling almost privileged that I knew a man who's making it so difficult to move on with my life after he's gone. May we all find the strength to go on
7. No one will understand how you feel. Your relationship with that person was unique. So don't expect anyone else to understand or have answers for you.
8. Life will always taste a little bitter from now on, and that’s not a bad thing. It’s just another flavour, a flavour which can make you appreciate all the beauty of life.
9. Let others feel as miserable as they want, or pretend that everything is ok.
10. You or your loved ones may start to become partially self-destructive. That's ok, as long as you don't let it destroy you or your loved ones.
Yupp... I'm living #10 at full blast
8 is a choice. You’re allowed to feel and see life whichever way you want. Just know that life’s flavor is how you chose it will taste from the point of that person’s death on. I’ve never felt bitterness after one of my loved ones died, cause more often than not, them staying alive meant physical and mental suffering. A part of me misses their presence, yes, but it never overpowers the peace I feel for them because they are finally free.
I completely agree. I abhor the idea that when a loved one dies, I'll just... always have that bitter taste. I've recently gone through the most painful experience of my life. I just got out of a long relationship and the end was so tumultuous, it was a shock to my system. I am periodically saddened, and I miss him every day, but I'm not now viewing the world through a lens of heartbreak, nor was I ever. Every emotion is a fleeting moment.
Holy shit this is the best wisdom I’ve seen since my wife died 7 mints ago. Good stuff. Esp “life will always taste a little bitter.” I’m having trouble with that one. On the one hand it DOES make you appreciate life more; on the other hand, I miss how I felt before and I know I never fully get it back.
AbsurdExistentialist thank you for that. I get it, also the part about the new, butter flavor.
My 3 year old tragically passed away last year. I believe the death of a child for a parent is the ultimate loss😪 This video gave me a sliver of hope and comfort, Thank You!
I'm truly sorry for the loss of your precious kid. Sending you a warm, big hug from Mexico 💜
I cannot even imagine being able to comprehend what that must feel like. I just know that I can't know, but one thing I do know is a phrase I heard somewhere: We honor the lives who have passed by making the most out of ours. I'm truely sorry for your loss, and I wish you a beautiful life.
K. Marie-- There is nothing, NOTHING worse than the death of your child. I know this from my own experience. If we don't just lie down and die ourselves, we must keep on functioning some way or other. My very deepest sympathy for you.
I lost my beautiful step daughter. Although she was not my child I can agree there is no greater loss than that of a child. It is not nature’s order. That was 8 years ago. I hope you find peace with it. xx
My dad died a year ago. Although I'm in a lot of pain, the worst is watching my grandmother (his mum) hurting. The loss of a child (for the second time in my grandma's case) is an unspeakable loss. I wish you to find at least a little peace.
My dad died of cancer earlier this year. For most of my life, I was always terrified about either of my parents dying. Fortunately we had a few months to prepare for his passing, but of course one can never truly prepare themselves for such a thing. Even so, when he left us, I wasn't scared. Somehow I felt that he was still with us - not in a literal, ghost-like way, but more like he used to be in a specific body, but now he was spread out everywhere.. so no matter where I go, I feel that he is still all around me, and that gives me some comfort. I think I was especially lucky with my dad because we never had any real fights or serious arguments and he had a great sense of humour. I know many people don't have such a good relationship with their fathers, so I count my blessings for all the good times and memories I have with him. The only thing that bothers me is how quickly people who were not as close to him as I was have moved on after his death. It's like they don't even want to mention his name anymore - perhaps because they think it might make me sad, but the opposite is true - it makes me sad that they don't talk about him and it's like he is no longer important to them. That made me consider how trivial our lives really are in the grand scheme of things - people will soon forget about you after you die, as though you never even existed to begin with. But I won't forget about my dad and what a great person he was.
I relate perfectly with what you said, but with my mother. She too died of cancer, the scare of parents dying, we had a great relationship too. Send you a hug.
@Steven King i lost my uncle to cancer last mouth he was my rock and i missing him and want him back i know i will see him again one day .
everelusivekudos I pray for your comfort
Same here, I missed my dad, it still raw. He died last January.
God bless u guys i lost my Dad definetly the best Dad i could ever have had and always have yeah we banged heads but in a father son way he was a real dad always there for me and loved me always.
Its sucks i wished God gave are parents back my life is emtpy without my bubba sighs im sorry for ur losses
Losing my Mom to stage four cancer in August and then My Dad to Covid in December is a bitter pill to Swallow...thanks for reminding of what's important
I just lost my granddad today to stage four cancer as well, was diagnosed yesterday and died today. Thinking of you. I hope in these two years your grief has become easier to handle ❤
"The depth of our grief is simply the price we pay for the extent of our love." -Alain de Botton
You caught that good. I think it's biggest point to this f'd up subject.
My father died two weeks ago from pneumonia. It was 3am in the morning. I was with him in hospital and held his hand. He suffered terribly for three days but his eventual death was quick and calm. I felt his soul leave in that final breath. My mother and sister were with him during the day and at night I stayed with him. I am so grateful for those hours when it was just us two. I looked after him when he was at his most vulnerable just as he looked after me when I was most vulnerable as a baby. A couple of years ago, out of the blue, he gave me a photo of himself feeding me in my high chair when I was about 11 months old. It’s almost like fate knew I would feed him the last meal he had - puréed food on a spoon - just as he was pictured feeding me. In those hours we said all that needed to be said so that when he drew his last breath I had complete closure. I was so relieved his suffering was over and I felt he left for a better place. I feel so fortunate that it happened the way it did. I never thought I had it inside of me to be strong for him and do this for him. I was scared to think of it happening but actually it was so calm and final that I am completely at peace with it. He was a wonderful father who taught me so much and showed me death is merely a transition.
Caro H u made me tear :.)
Yessy Ysay oh bless you! Don’t be sad. I’m not. I’m happy for the time we had. xx
Sending you much sympathy. You seem so much at peace, that gives me hope. The way you experienced the passing of your father reminds me a lot of the way my mother died last year. I slept next to her in her bed at home during the last days. At 6 in the morning it happened, with me next to her, the first birds singing outside the window. It was the most intimate gift I could have been given. She was there when I took my first breath, and I as her only child was there when she breathed her last. I am heartbroken but at the same time immensely thankful. It changed my outlook on everything.
Be strong, be vulnerable, be whatever it feels like at that moment. And find people who will just hold you, without the need to talk or explain. Sending you love. Iris
blackappleseed - thank you for sharing that intensely personal moment with your mother. You have the moment exactly - that it is as much a privilege to be with someone at their last moment as it is their first. I do feel peaceful and reconciled with his death. The way he suffered, despite the best medical care, in his last days does upset me still - particularly as he never once complained but thanked everyone who came to help him be comfortable. It has profoundly changed the way I look at things. Watching my dad die showed me that whether I believe his soul has moved on elsewhere or whether I believe he is just dead and gone doesn’t matter because it is just the cycle of life and all my previous fear and resistance to it made it unbearable and I suffered terribly when my grandparents died and my step daughter who was just 23. I do miss him but not in a painful way if that makes sense. I hope you can reach that point too with your mother. She was so lucky to have you with her for those last days. Good luck my friend. xx
my Dad died on Saturday 29th December 2018 at 6:10pm he was 69 and had dementia and a very had chest infection which he just wouldn't fight, He was in a lot of pain but hes not now. I miss him greatly and wish me and him had a better relationship when we did. my parents broke up when I was 15 because he was abusive to us and I didn't see him again till I was 22 and he was in hospital because he was poorly and I just learnt he had dementia. for a year I tried my best to go see him and make up for lost time and when he got very poorly with a chest infection I made him eat and drink and I tried so hard to keep him going but it wasn't good enough. I didn't go see him on boxing day because I thought he was getting better he was alert and sitting up and talking but when I got the call that he went down hill again and I keep thinking that maybe if I went that day I could of got him to ate or drink something it may of helped him to hold on.
i'm now 23 years old and my dad is gone :[ I do regret so much and wish I tried harder but I feel like I have failed him.
I found it hard to connect with him but I do love him and miss him so much I wish I could of took his place but all I could do was hold his hand and kept telling him I love him no matter what happens and if he needed to go that it's ok because I will always love him.
1. What touched me the most from this incredibly beautiful lesson is this sentence:
" Love wants there to be more love."
Pablo Neruda has this poem, "La Muerta", where he says to his lover that even if she dies he will have to continue to live. For his fellow human beings. Here are the last lines of that poem:
“If you no longer live,
if you, beloved, my love,
if you have died,
all the leaves will fall in my breast,
it will rain on my soul night and day,
the snow will burn my heart,
I shall walk with frost and fire and death and snow,
my feet will want to walk to where you are sleeping, but
I shall stay alive,
because above all things
you wanted me indomitable,
and, my love, because you know that I am not only a man
but all mankind.”
( I will add the original version in Spanish as a response to this comment. )
2. I would also love to think that once you die, you find peace. There is a very funny scene in Luis Bunuel’s book “ My last breath”. He says:
“" .....despite my horror of the press, I'd love to rise from the grave every 10 years or so and go buy a few newspapers. Ghostly pale, sliding silently along the walls, my papers under my arm, I'd return to the cemetery and read about all the disasters in the world before falling back to sleep, safe and secure in my tomb.''
3. We should read Fernando Pessoa's poem " Birthday" ( Aniversario). It tells us that when someone we love passes away, life will never be the same again. Our happiness will never be complete again. It is incredibly sad, but at least it makes you feel like you are not isolated in your pain. Besides it is good to remember it now, when some of our beloved ones are still alive.
4. Montaigne was also almost dead once and he had learnt a lot from that experience. There is a wonderful article about it by Robert Krulwich, called
“ Death but softly”. Here is a very interesting part from it:
“Michel de Montaigne recovered from his accident and lived another 22 years, but, says Sarah Bakewell, he thought about that experience for the rest of his life. He knew he hadn't faced down death. He hadn't struggled, or resisted, or even really acknowledged at the time that he was about to die. Instead, he had floated up to it, or it to him, and at the moment when he was almost gone, he learned, he said, that "DEATH COULD HAVE A FRIENDLY FACE"
That's what he wrote later, that there is something in the grand scheme of things that will make the parting gentle. What looks like suffering from the outside may not be the deep experience of the dying one. And therefore, he advised,
"If you don't know how to die, don't worry; Nature will tell you what to do on the spot, fully and adequately. She will do this job perfectly for you; don't bother your head about it."
5. I have heard from someone who had lost his father, that Radiolab podcast's episode about death has helped him a lot to deal with his grief.
6. Songs always help too.... Especially if you feel numb and can't even cry, they help you to feel your pain and soften your grief.
One song I have heard a thousand times is:
" Quando Corpus Morietur" by Giovanni Battista Pergolesi.
Poor guy died when he was only 26 from tuberculosis...It is a truly wonderful, wonderful piece of music.
Thank you for such valuable insights and for the very beautiful animation! How I wish everyone in the world could see this lesson....
Aqui esta el poema de Neruda:
LA MUERTA
Si de pronto no existes,
si de pronto no vives,
yo seguiré viviendo.
No me atrevo,
no me atrevo a escribirlo,
si te mueres.
Yo seguiré viviendo.
Porque donde no tiene voz un hombre
allí, mi voz.
Donde los negros sean apaleados
yo no puedo estar muerto.
Cuando entren en la cárcel mis hermanos
entraré yo con ellos.
Cuando la victoria,
no mi victoria,
sino la gran victoria
llegue
aunque esté mudo debo hablar:
yo la veré llegar aunque esté ciego.
No, perdóname.
Si tú no vives,
si
tú, querida, amor mío,
si tú
te has muerto,
todas las hojas caerán en mi pecho,
lloverá sobre mi alma noche y día,
la nieve quemará mi corazón,
andaré con frío y fuego y muerte y nieve,
mis pies querrán marchar hacia donde tú duermes,
pero
seguiré vivo,
porque tú me quisiste sobre todas las cosas
indomable,
y, amor, porque tú sabes que soy no sólo un hombre
sino todos los hombres.
Lua Veli Thanks for sharing your understanding. The first poem made me cry.
@@bolivar1789 ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
My dad committed suicide 7 years ago. I never got over it, and I don’t think I will ever do. Thank you for saying that was okay 💕
I'm sorry for your loss. It's so difficult to lose someone that way.
My deep sympathy to you. Be good to yourself.
Wishing you well. Keep strong, it's hard but keep trying.
It is okay, some things are so important that just "getting over them" is a disservice to their impact on you. Your only responsibility is to analyze your situation and not let it consume you.
Lost my best friend some time ago the same way. I too feel as if I will never 'get over it' but I think that's okay
I lost my:
Grandfather - Feb 2020
my church-mate friend - Aug 2020
my Dad - Aug 2020
my puppy - Sept 2020
Right now, I feel as if my heart is being hammered to dust 💔
I am so sorry - that is a lot to handle. Have you been comforted by your faith in God?
The pain we can feel when someone close to us has died is really strong and lasts for a long time
Fernando Gomez de la Torre it lasts forever
This song is dedicated to everyone who lost a loved one. God bless. "I'm calling out your name tonight" by Richie Levoi
ruclips.net/video/JSbGGiSe3S8/видео.html
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
My cat died just under 2 years ago. I went through a lot with my cat. I starved so that he could eat sometimes. He used to physically lift my head up when I was crying. I loved him like no other person or creature on this earth. He was my equivalent of losing a son. He was hit by a car and what I saw was grim. And yet when he died there was no sympathy, my mother in law just bought me a new cat, which hurt and which I immediately gave back. If my partner died would she expect me to have a new one the next day?
People say it's just a pet but it's not. This has been one of the hardest things I have ever been through and I've previously lost my twin sister and grandfather. Hearing this video, although maybe aimed at human deaths, helps me realise that my response is normal. I still don't understand how others don't feel this hurt by the loss of their animals though.
@@mim.357 *Hugs* if you want them.
Hello there. I am so sorry to hear that. I understand your pain and wish you so well...
@@bolivar1789 thank you very much. I wish you well also.
I know exactly how hard the pain and loss of a pet can be. Where can you find unconditional love like that? May your heart heal in time and your memories comfort you.
I’m in the same situation as you are right now, on Sunday my dog got run over by my mom while she was driving out of our driveway, we were best friends since I was 9 and he literally moved county’s with me. I think the hardest part is that I don’t get to have time to process it properly because “it’s just a dog , get over it” and I can’t just skip out on life for 3 days to mope around and reflect.
Death is terrible for anyone. Young or old, good or evil, it’s all the same. Death is impartial. There is no especially terrible death. That’s why death is so fearsome. Your deeds, your age, your personality, your wealth, your beauty: they are all meaningless in the face of death.
I aint scared 😡
I've almost died multiple times and I've honestly wasn't afraid for any of them
Its not about being scared i think what micheals tryin to say is death cant b bargained with when its ur time its ur time..its easy to say u arent scared when ur young cause u almost feel like its never goin to happen to u
How The Fuck do I see you everywhere?
@@tori9365 ohhhh How edgy
No 3 made me cry immediately. My dad died 10 years ago but I still feel ashamed that I wasn't there when he died. Just because I thought I can visit him at the hospital later that day. I could have been there but I decided not to go out of selfish reasons. It's painful. After all these years it still is. Hearing that I loved him enough makes it a bit more bearable.
Same with me, I wish I was there in my mom's last moments. I wish I can tell her how much I love her, this idiot me didn't tell her that because I thought she can survive this and now I regret it forever.
My girlfriend died exactly 2 weeks ago and I still can't believe it's real. I loved her so much words can't sufficiently express. Not a day passes without me wishing to join her. I've cried so many tears my face looks swollen already. Can't eat, shower, sleep or do chores or work properly. I think I might lose it some day...
God Bless You* Find peace & know she is truly with you* I believe in after life* I have to to stay sane*
I fully understand your suffering. I lost my boyfriend 2 years ago and I'm still in grief. It got slightly easier but still miss him and love him so much.. We just have to think we will see them again when our time comes
The love of my life who was also my best friend past away this past summer. He was everything, learning to deal with a life without him is hard; making future plans has not been easy. Thank you for this video.
Hello, hope you can read my comment. I just lost mine also almost a month now. And it is terribly hard. Please let me know how are you doing now. As i feel i get the worst feeling each day passing by.
My husband is at the end of his life.. I’m so scared
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
@@loukresha5132 please, how are you now?
It is so important to accept death as a part of life because only then can we appreciate life to its fullest.
Yet, knowing that the worst thing that can happen to us is to die is kinda calming as well when we are in difficult situations. It really helped me in some nerve-wracking moments :)
Smart to think death is the worst thing that can happen to you when even some present themselves. Meaning that if you survived and didnt die youre stronger for it
I agree. Memento mori is not so scary - it is the opposite. Live your life to the fullest.
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
Death is not a part of life, death is the end of life
@@neemapaxima6116 it’s not the end. We go on. This is just one phase of our energetic existence.
What people don’t talk about is that years later, you still miss that person. There was an old senior on TikTok who said she still missed her mother. the feeling doesn’t leave…it hasn’t for me, 10 years later.
When someone you love dies...you feel pain.
This pain is your love and appreciation for that person growing larger within you.
I have noticed that what tends to kill elderly people is when there spouse dies because they are lonely then.
What about when here spouse dies?
Hello there! I really don't want to sound mean, but I remembered the best joke I have ever heard on marriage, so I thought I will just write it:
" Two older laides are drinking tea. One says to another:
-Oh, my husband is an angel....
And the other one replies:
-You are so lucky my dear, mine is still alive! "
There is a German comedian, Eckarth von Hirschhausen, who says that when a woman dies, her husband also dies soon after, not necessarily because of love, but because he had lost the one who was taking care of him. And then he says:
" But if the man dies, the woman flourishes!" .
Himmm, it is a mean thing to say of course, but there is some truth to that too. I mean I have certainly seen it a lot.
Oh I hope I didn't depress you with my message. Of course there are cases where people genuinely love and miss each other. Best wishes :- )
@88Gibson LesPaul That was a good response to that. True, as well.
It killed Celia Cruz's husband soon after she died he succumbed to loneliness and perished.
88Gibson LesPaul
Hello there! Oh that sounds very tender, I am sure there must be cases like that too. But at least what I have seen personally ( which of course has no statistical value at all! ) goes into the other direction. You know, I take this little train every Wednesday to go to one of the music schools where I teach. At one stop a huge group of cheerful grandma's gets in, who are going to a very beautiful town close by, for a long walk. They are members of a " Wander- Gruppe" as they say in German . The youngest must be 80 years old or so... I always chat with them. And to tell you the truth, several of them I met were relieved to be finally " retired" from marriage and from all that taking care of others. One of them even said: "my husband passed away 20 years ago. I am so glad... I have a little garden, I have friends, I am member of a gardening club. Life is great. " I am not saying this is ideal. But certainly there is this in life too...
Just lost my dad this last week and I really needed this video. Thank you so much.
Sorry for your lost, it'll take a long time.....be good to yourself.
Oh I'm sorry :( Me 9 years ago, and I'm still here
@@jlina Thank you. I am working hard to stay positive!
@@WeronikaSalach Thank you, Your words give me hope and inspiration :)
@@HHCforlife I agree with the video that this pain never disappears, bur I assure you, with time it'll get better. Some people deal faster, some maybe need help. I went even to psychotherapy, and those Dad topics came out too. It gave me a relief to talk about it. Now my boyfriend is going through this, his Dad isn't well. We all carry this cross, our parents will leave one day. Kisses and strength!
My dad died suddenly in his sleep this January. I haven’t been able to bring myself to read through our texts in my phone until tonight. It was so beautiful and emotional and painful to read. Needed this video afterwards, thank you ❤️
So sorry to hear that. My dad passed away suddenly from infection this April. He was just 50. I'm trying to pull myself but it's just not working
This is beautiful. I lost my mother this week (she was 58), she raised me by herself (with my older sisters). We had time to prepare and come to terms with the idea, and when it happened we had a beautiful Irish wake. Now that it's all finished I feel like this video has articulated everything I have already felt, and that I am on the right track. The death of a parent is one of the most defining moments of growth for a human being and one to embrace. Walk on, with all of the memories and ingrained values that will become virtues, held dearly, and valued by generations that my mother will never know.
Today my mother died. Cherish your time with your parents. I hope your parents live for a long time. If you are facing loss same as me, be strong and know that your happiness is thier happiness.
I watched this everyday after someone i knew passed away from COVID19.... Thank you
My boyfriend passed away this year at age 28. We were together for 5+ years and were planning to marry maybe next year. I truely believed he was the love of my life and still do. Don't know why this happened to him but its hard to imagine a life without him. Still trying my best to keep myself saint and live my life beautifuly.
im so sorry for your loss, i hope you're doing well. i too have a boyfriend who might pass away in 10 years (he's 20 right now), he has a weak heart. i dont know how to deal with this anticipatory grief of mine, i want to try my best to keep loving him the same but this fear just can't rest. have you got any advice to share with me?
My mother passed away due to a chronic disease two weeks ago. And your video and your messages made justice to the feelings I did not know how to put into words: that she shaped me to be a good person like she was, and for that I will always be grateful. That they do not leave us, but continue to live with us - in the memories and in the way we change and leave our imprint in the world. That they are at last in peace, free from all pain or remorse or suffering, as we will all one day do. A heartfelt thank you for this video. It made me feel a little better while passing through this very dark path that, like many others arriving at this video, I have never walked before.
I totally agree - lost my 2 siblings, leaving me only child. Now I hear my brother's laughter in my son's; and see my sister's face in strangers' faces/my dreams, especially when I'm feeling neglected/alone.
And yes, they are truly at peace; it's the bereaved that suffer when a loved one dies, not the deceased.
Thanks for the video TSOL! 💜
My father died on December 18th in 2020. He was a recovering addict and had spent many years imprisoned and on the streets. He was always in and out but that October he got out of jail and started to get his life back together. Then one Friday, he just died. Just out of no where it seemed. I’m only 17 and I’m so broken knowing that he was getting things together. And right when he decided too, it was too late. He was only 48💔
I am crying right now. I've been missing my Dad. It's been more than a year since he passed away.
These past few weeks, I couldn't help but think again and again if I've done enough for him, if he understood how much I love him, or if I'm living the life he wanted for me.
Thank you for this video. I've now released some pent up emotion and cried because of the message here.
I understand you, cause I lost my father a month ago, and I have the same thoughts. It is too difficult to accept he who was always there, doesnt exist anymore.
lidette711 I'm sorry. I know exactly how you feel. I hope it gets better for both of us. 💔
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
I dreamt about my father tonight. He had been hiding the resurgence of his cancer, and died 3 months ago now in a hotel all alone on his vacation. He became 50. In the dream i begged him to tell us and talk to us before it was too late. So that we could say goodbye love and hug him. I think so much about how long he knew. How afraid and lonely he was. The odd phonecall and goodbyes, The snapps the day he died. His dead body, blue and swolen. No one knew. He was so loved by everyone.. protecting us, i think. Im sorry. I love you and miss you.
Golden I truly wish you the best and I hope that your father is resting well in peace. My mom once told me that loved ones who have died appear in your dreams once in a while. He definitely was to young. Bless you both ❤️
I hope you have found the meaning in his reasons for hiding his illness, and I hope that it gives you strength. I'm positive that was in love for his family.
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My aunt died this morning after a long illness. She had a brain tumour and was suffering for the past 10 months, so she is in a better place now and I belive that she's relieved and free of all the pain. It's the first time that somebody I know and love has died, so it doesn't feel quite real. I hope that all of you, who are going through the same thing I am, feel better and know that they are really in a better place and we will get through this together. ❤
OH MY GOSH MY AUNTS HUSBAND HAD A BRAIN TUMOUR TOO AND HE JUST HAD PAIN SO MUCH…I’M SO HAPPY THAT HE IS IN A BETTER PLACE BUT STILL MISSING HIM SO BADLY…I’M EVEN CRYING NOW GOD HELP ME-😞
Mine died this morning. She raised me. And she is dead
This is so timely.
My ex-boyfriend has passed away from cancer recently and I'm struggling so much to process it and none of my friends could remotely understand.
So sorry this happened. My best friend passed 2 months ago from a brain tumor and everything changes. I'm sure you're aware by now, but no one will understand how you feel. Your relationship with that person was unique. So don't expect anyone else to understand or have answers for you.
EDIT: That sounded a little harsh, lol. I'm just saying, #1 on the video is right. You might never fully recover, and it's not a bad thing. Much respect to you.
@@AbsurdExistentialist youre a nice person
Condolences
Thank you so much. You've made my day :)
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Right on time. My mom died last Tuesday due to an unexpected illness. 💔
Janet Jackson 😢
I'm very sorry for your loss, stay strong darling
Yeh it's hard I know how feel some times I can't even sleep. Coz I am in deep though & can't believe it's already 2:49 am & I'm still righting 🤷♂️or well ☮️Peace to U All✌️.
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That was so beautiful. My dog will always be with me
My best friend took her life 2 days ago. Thank you so much for the message. It helped my friends and I so much.
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My parents both passed away and grandparents did too years ago. A couple of days ago Silvia one of my closest girlfriends did too. I spent these days thinking of her, about all the adventures we had together as young women 20 years ago. Her laughters are resounding once more here in my bedroom where I 'm lying and daydreaming about our past things and make me smile again. She was 56, beautiful and witty, a dry humored but open hearted soul, she was a mother a wife a daughter and a warrior.she taught me to learn and be myself. When she was with me I never felt in danger. Different life paths sometimes divided us for a long time. But I never felt abandoned. And Im not feeling it now. Its funny: Im sad but Im not feeling in despair. It s only that a huge hole opened in my heart: it s not painful but I feel nothing will fix it ever.
I miss my grandma more and more with each passing day, she was like a second mother to my brother and I. Sometimes it feels as though she is still with us but then reality sets in and I realise she’s been gone for more than four years now. I wish I could give her a big warm hug and tell her how much I love her from the bottom of my heart. We could’ve done so much more for her but we were both stupid naive children. The only consolation is that she lived life to the fullest and she’s now in a better place free of any pain and suffering. Until we meet again grandma, you will be in our hearts forever 😔❤️🧡💚
I've never cried because of a video. Until now. I lost my dad seven years ago. I was in the army and was gonna see him on a weekend. I had not seen him in couple of weeks. He died the morning we were suppose to meet again. I miss him a lot.
It's so hard to move on or get over once we lose someone. I really wish the very best for the people who
have lost their loved ones. Just a friendly youtuber.
Your Alpha Dude nice message my friend 😊
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One moment i was happy the next i get a call about my grandfather passing away despite hope , optimism, faith, and love ... Still can't believe those words of grief and death
I lost my ex boyfriend almost a year ago now, there is not a day that passes that don’t I miss his laugh. I think about him constantly, This video helped me a lot, thanks
This song is dedicated to everyone who lost a loved one. God bless. "I'm calling out your name tonight" by Richie Levoi
ruclips.net/video/JSbGGiSe3S8/видео.html
ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
I lost my dad almost three years ago on Easter. He was a diabetic and suffered from alcoholism. On the night he died, his blood sugar dropped too low and he went into a diabetic coma, then died. It's profound how the death of someone you love creates an internal battle for those close to them. This video helps in some ways, but it doesn't really illustrate the intense emotional turmoil that you have to live with -- and that some of your friends will give up on you for. Or how transformational the pain can be, in good and bad ways. For those who are still grieving from a loss long ago, or have experienced a new loss, I'd encourage you to comment. I'd love nothing more than to be an ear for those who need it most, because society views grieving as an inconvenience, and those among us who are unlucky (like me) often have no one to lean on.
To ST I have just lost my beautiful gorgeous courageous wife of 40 years only three weeks ago yesterday.She fought asophaegael cancer for 10 weeks.aWhat makes it all the more difficult is because the nhs made so many mistakes which I don't care to go into otherwise she'd still be here I promise.It feels like a light has gone out in my very soul as we had all these plans that can't be fulfilled between us but,rest assured it was her wish that I continued with our plans as though she were here.I believe our soul truly goes on to a better place and my family and I have seen signs that she is definitely in a better place as she communicated to us in her own way.It is also a subject that I have studied for many years and it is definitely worth looking into for your own peace of mind albeit it never stops one wishing our loved ones were still with us it definitely helps our heart and soul.The hardest part was caring for her during her illness and seeing her go through so much pain and anguish it broke my heart into a thousand pieces, but even now as it has only been a short time since her passing as much as I try I cannot believe she is not here because exceptance plays a big part in the bereavement process.As they say only time can mend a broken wing.I truly hope and wish you love and peace.
I love my mum. She died 7 yrs ago & I still found this helpful despite my journey since then, thank you. My mum loved me & I’m blessed to have that knowledge that we were both secure with our deep love for each other
My grandfather died just yesterday. I already knew he was sick but it just hits you when their gone. It doesn't feel like it happened. It really doesnt...💔
Thank you... My grandmother passed away recently and she was, without doubt, one of my most favorite people in the world... I accept the thing that happened as a natural process, but as mentioned, I will never truly get over it. Although, she is not suffering anymore as she did, that makes me somewhat content that she's not dealing with the burden that she had before...
I lost my older brother which was 21, hella young, my heart is shatterd.💔
To all who have lost someone - please take care of yourself. A lot of people are preying on those who are recovering from a loss of a loved one. It's not a good time to become religious or join some movement. It's not a good time to open up your vulnerability to strangers. Please stay safe and take care of your needs.
George* It has been three years since you posted here* I was touched by your words thank you* I am so lost without him & it isnt getting any easier. If you also lost your love I pray you have found peace and love if that's what you wanted* God Bless You*
Thanks so much GOD BLESS
“It is not death that we wish to avoid, but life that we wish to live.” ― Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged
Yep awhile after my father passed away, I missed talking to him having a drink and just being with him having him in my life
Fuck Ayn Rand
A friend of mine has been missing at the sea for almost a year now. He's been declared presumed dead. Still in the state of disbelief. He went missing in the vastness of Atlantic cean. incomprehensible. Shocking. Wherever he is right now, I hope he's at peace. 😢
My dad died three years ago... Those he trusted most robbed his warm body and stole from his children... I cry often as he never got to see that my brother and I are doing well and he did a great job with us. Sometimes I wish he would come to me in a dream but he never comes... I miss you so much daddy 😢😢😢
I feel your pain
I'm lucky my dad visits me in my dreams
My loved one died yesterday I need this
I'm sorry for your loss.
Mine the day before yesterday. So sorry, and hugs to you.
Accept my sympathy. Lost a loved one recently. U will feel terrible inside,I know. Its painful. But hope with the passing of time u will come to a place of acceptance and find peace. Be strong.
I’m sorry for your loss... if you need anyone to talk to, I’m here for you.
When my mom died it was a very sunny day, after watching the movie Dreams (1990) I understood that I should celebrate her life rather than be sad, that really helped me. I wish you to have peace in your heart and that someday, in the very distant future you get back together.
Thank you, School of Life. This really was beautiful ❤️
Just close your eyes and you will see
All the memories that you have of me
Just sit and relax and you will find
I'm really still there inside your mind
Don't cry for me now that I am gone
For I am in the land of song
There is no pain, there is no fear
So dry away that silent tear
Don't think of me in the dark and cold
For here I am, no longer old
I'm in that place that's filled with love
Known to you as up above.
-author unknown
Reiko Kirkland oh my goodness 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢💟💟💟💜💜💜💜💜
That’s so beautiful :(
First you made me cry by this poem
Now as you wrote "author unknown "
I am crying more
This just amde me cry😭😭
@@koushlendrapatel5100 samee😭
I really want to hug this video after watching this. Thank u for creating such priceless videos and saying things which have never been told by someone else.
Today my grandpa passed away. Just few days after I got my bachelor degree with high honors. My family was hiding from me and my two teen cousins that grandpa's problems with alcohol had remissed some time ago. He was just a nice introversive drandpa who could not treat his problem and personal psychological crysis well as the most of his age mates do here.
And I feel personally so guilty that I did not spent enough time with him especially this last month. I just can't believe I will never hear his voice again.
I hate myself so much that my priority was studing but not my loved one. And I hate myself that I did not take seriosly my mom's insinuations that it is better to visit grandpa. My last visit was just 2 days before he was gone and I can't cope with all those terrible feeling of self dusgust and self contempt. This is so horrifying that the next and last time I see him in his coffin.
Thanks you for your video. It really helps
Mum passed away recently and since then I've been watching videos that could help me to get through this. It's brutal.. It's the toughest thing that happened to me.. I loved her so much and called her everyday.. I feel like a lost child, weak and fragile and a stranger in this world.. I want to see her, hear her, hug her and kiss her.. I miss her and I'm scared of the idea of living in life without her.. It's something that I'd have to live my life with..but I keep hearing her telling me to stay strong and keep being a good person and live your life happily and that she is with me.. thank you for everything mum.. I will always love you.. ♥
My wife and I just had to put down our 4 year old cat who we loved dearly. He got extremely sick out of nowhere and after a several day battle fought by us for him and fought by the vets at the animal hospital, we had to make the choice to let him go. So at noon on this past Sunday he took his last breath while laying in my arms while my wife and I let him know over and over how much we love him and would never forget. I still cry for most of the day, the pain and loss is excruciating and difficult to cope with. It absolutely devastates us and we both will forever carry a hole in our hearts and the memory of our 4 year old cat Frank who was loved by everyone who ever met him. I just needed to tell someone and put this out there.
P Kurk Please, have some tact. So many people under this video are in pain after lost of their beloved ones (human). It is a bit disrespectfull for us.
By the way I love animals (that’s why I’m vegetarian since 11 years) and I lost two of my doggies. These dogs where a part of my family... I craied a lot and it was painful BUT believe me there is nothing to compare with when you see ex. your dad (in my case) dead - while he was so young and just few hours ago was alive. This is pain.
@Cla Ra All deaths are painful. There is no need to compare them.
@p kurk , I am so so sorry for your loss and I understand you fully. After 8 years together, I had to make the decision of putting down my cat just 5 days ago. What I wished was a simple matter was indeed a serious acute renal failure from which she could not recover and was in pain that would never again disappear. The vet strongly advised thus that letting her go would be the kindest thing we could do for her. We caressed her through the whole process until her last breath and I have been crying since. To make matters worse, just 2 days after her death we received the news that our other cat has the same kidney issues and, despite not as advanced as her case was, no timeframe could be given as to how long he will remain with us. I don't wish this sort of pain on anyone, I love my cats as dearly as if they were my children and to watch one die suddenly and having to watch the decay of the other one is nearly unbearable. I wish strength to all that have and are currently facing the sickness and death of a dear pet. Much love to you.
@@AMJHandle It's excruciating and i wish you all the best in your time of sadness. Time helps heal the pain though it doesnt make you miss them any less.
@@Pkurkowski2 thank you so much for your kind words :) You are right, only time will help. Right now, it's still hard to imagine a day where I won't cry about it, as I miss her so terribly, but I'll keep trying. Fortunately, our other cat seems to be stable, good news for now on that end :)
Much love, thank you again, and take good care of yourself*
Thank you for this video. It's painful for me to lose my badass uncle last night. You never know when you go.
My grandmother passed away yesterday. I regret I didn't express my love for her fully enough.
My grandpa has just died two hours ago. I really need to understand what I am feeling and how to do it.
Thank you so, so, sooooooo much because it is being really hard to go through.
😭
Bro how can u get over it it's so hard
My grandma just died two hours ago, I wish your grandpa serenity and peace
My aunt died from COVID-19, I'm still fucked up. May her be at peace.
my grandmother passed away a few days ago. my heart broke into million of pieces. she was the sweetest woman i have ever known. i love her the most in this world ❤️
School of Life, I don't know what to say. How you can put such easy to understand, emotional and yet very therapeutic videos together in all but 5 minutes is astonishing. I learn more in these 5 minutes than I do in lectures. Can you perhaps do a video on Perfectionism and how it links to low self esteem/not feeling good enough? Don't think I've seen this yet from you. Keep up the amazing work! You're changing lives :)
Oh my god, this is so on time... I lost my beloved brother... Watching and crying...
My mother passed away last Sunday. It felt like a part of me died. I guess we can only get better as days go by.
My Dad died nearly the exact time this video came out... I just saw it now and it really does help a lot. I have so many happy memories of him and its true, I don't think he will ever be fully away. There is a nice and comfy corner at the back of my mind and he will be there. Always.
Live harder better and happier for them! I believe our love ones would be very happy to see us doing well. And remember they are always in our hearts!
Lost my mom in March too. She was also 53. Sending love your way, so sorry for your loss.
My brother died today.. I am missing him so much. One thing I understand today is be happy and make others happy.. We never know what will happen next second
It's also comforting to have hope for a better future, where you can see your brother again. I am sorry for your loss.
My aunt died 5 minutes ago and I am in so much pain I already gone through one that I will never Forget. Be safe and be happy 😞
This is just what I needed to hear. Thanks! These words are what I needed to feel peace as I suffered the loss of a loved one, my wife, not long ago ..!
Lucas Martins 😢 so sorry Lucas. I hope you find peace.
I lost my mother which is my grandma on july 17 since she raised me when i was 1 year old when i was abandoned by my parents. Im so alone and sad because she is my remaining family i seek for.
Lost my dad grandmother uncle and a friend this year so this helped thank u
Last few years have been very difficult. First was the death of my beautiful and wise dog, then my great-grandma died, then my father almost exactly a year ago, then another one of my lovely dogs, then my aunt, then grandpa and last week my grandma. I loved and will always love them all very much. I don't even understand what is happening around anymore. Everything seems misty, muted, grey. It's hard not to think about what we could've done better, or how we could've been better for them. I just don't want anyone to die with the feeling of being abandoned, not loved, with uncertainty about how much they mean to others. My life an lives of my loved ones who are still here are in ruins, we are lost. Thank you for the video. It helps a little to understand, even if it's only a bit. Thank you for the soothing voice and thank you everyone in the comments for being brave and surviving what life's brought upon you. We will get through this I believe. And memory of our loved ones should inspire us to be better people and make this world a better place. That's the best thing we can do to honor them. I wish you all, and myself and my family, peace.
My brother died last year at the age of 19, I was so in shock that I told my parents that I'm fine and that i will go to school, looking back at it, it makes me feel so sad about myself, like how much in shock I was in, I was shaking and didn't even cry, I miss him so much, Rest in peace for the people who lost their loved ones.
This song is dedicated to everyone who lost a loved one. God bless. "I'm calling out your name tonight" by Richie Levoi
ruclips.net/video/JSbGGiSe3S8/видео.html
I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss.
Same with me my brother also died last month at the age of 19
@@Avanishyadav045 I'm very sorry for your loss, may he rest in peace ❤
My grandpa died yesterday and I loved him so much I saw him every day god bless the people who had family members died
Please share your thoughts about mortality; your own or that of loved ones. Do also help us to keep paying for films by subscribing to our channel and turning on notifications.
impeccable timing. i’m dealing with the loss of a loved one for the first time. it’s drastically changed my life
i never got the chance to say goodbye to them. they weren’t sick, suffering, or by any means on the direct path to death. they drowned in the ocean.
The part where you mentioned that they are abandoned and also that we dissapoint them that so true.. I feel I have let my father down in many ways but truly that's our own insecurity talking. Where ever my dad is he is at peace. He died a sudden death this year in May and I feel helpless.
Thank you for this video, i found it a couple years ago when my aunt died, and I watch it again today when my dad is gone. It hurts so much but this video makes it a little better. Im sending a hug and so, so much love to someone else going through this.
My father passed away from Covid a week ago. I miss him so much.
My mom died of covid two days ago. The emptiness is so deep, the feeling of nothingness. At the same time, my gratitude for her grows within me every minute. If you ever want to talk or share your experience hit me up. Kind regards from Argentina! xx
I lost my dad to the COVOID-19
And it has completely ruined my life
He was such a great man and he didn't deserve this
R.I.P dad i hope you find the people you lost in heaven and reunite with them and i hope once i die I'll meet you again in the after life ❤️😞
I had a dog who was fighting cancer, I made a decision to let him go. The day he died, we were in his favorite park with people he loved and I sang him a song before he went. He was my best friend, son, and my family we did everything together. I miss him tremendously. 6 months have passed and it's hard to feel anything do stuff without my buddy. Forever loved Buster
@Karina Gutierrez , I am so so sorry for your loss and I understand you fully. After 8 years together, I had to make the decision of putting down my cat just 5 days ago. What I wished was a simple matter was indeed a serious acute renal failure from which she could not recover and was in pain that would never again disappear. The vet strongly advised thus that letting her go would be the kindest thing we could do for her. We caressed her through the whole process until her last breath and I have been crying since. To make matters worse, just 2 days after her death we received the news that our other cat has the same kidney issues and, despite not as advanced as her case was, no timeframe could be given as to how long he will remain with us. I don't wish this sort of pain on anyone, I love my cats as dearly as if they were my children and to watch one die suddenly and having to watch the decay of the other one is nearly unbearable. I wish strength to all that have and are currently facing the sickness and death of a dear pet. Much love to you.
The love of my life Glenn died 3 months ago. I am forever changed. I long to be with him again. I hope when it’s my time he is there to take me with him.
My grandma died in September and I lived with her my entire life because my Mother didn’t really know how to be a Mother. It was like something she just couldn’t learn how to do, nobody hated her for it. We all still loved her and moved on but when my grandma died, it was the worst day of my life. It felt like, and still feels like, the sun set and never rose again. Like a certain necessary warmth that was in my life everyday is now gone. My Mother felt the exact same way, and that’s when she got sick and it was like she gave up. She just passed away on May 22 and it was natural causes, but the conditions she was in were horrible. The House underneath her feet was sold during a pandemic, she had no money, no home, she was homeless in a hotel with no hope feeling unloved and I just feel so sorry for her. We didn’t live together, 1500 miles apart honestly but I still feel bad for her because I loved her. I lost them both
My daughter passed away unexpectedly at 21 and then a year later her boyfriend took his life. Thank you for this video. ❤️
My mother has died for 5 weeks now and I feel like I will never get better. It feels like a nightmare waking up everyday and having to aknowledge that she is gone, that I didn't get to say goodbye.
A couple months ago my uncle was one of the victims of COVID-19. He wasn’t that old, early 50s, he was a healthy man and was a “friend to the world”. I’ll miss him so much.
My brother just died today. And just the other week, my wife died. And a week before that, my dad. Last year it was my mom. It's very difficult and yet, in a strange way, liberating. Although I am deeply saddened, I am genuinely fine. Perhaps because I fully understand why certain things happen, but it is still painful nonetheless.
My Dad died this a few hours ago, his last words was were was I and he wanted me there. I'm away from the state his in and I wished so much I was there.
My grandfather has died a few hours ago. He was the only reason to live, now I really don't know what to do 😭
My dad passed away yesterday I can’t describe how much I miss him I know you’re there looking down on me dad i love you Rest In Peace R.I.P
I felt like I didn’t love him enough
This is what im feeling rn, just guilt i wish i could turn back time just to say i'm so sorry for every single thing and i love them soo so soo much.
The fact that you're still thinking of him is the proof of the fact that you love him. Love doesn't necessarily mean huge large outrageous confessions, if that would be so then no man without ear, tongue or a voice or even basic functionality would be able to fall in love. But they do. Don't ever doubt your love for him, even if there were bitter moments, it just makes us reflect on our behaviour better.
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One year and 2 month ago my beloved dad passed away. Believe me or not, but upon the request of my best friend, Alain de Botton wrote me a birthday letter - exactly a year ago. I was so lucky! He wrote me quite a few sentences but one brought me so much consolation.
„If it is any consolation, life is hell for everyone, just not at the same time, which gives us the illusion we might be suffering alone. But we are not.”
I wanted to share it with you.
Alain you are my hero! 💕
Death of my mom is my most biggest fear
aloha Alia as a mum that’s lovely to know she means so much to you. But she would, I am sure, be upset to hear you fear her death which is inevitable. Tell her and she will reassure you that she will always be with you. I’ve told my children I’m coming back to haunt them which they think is really funny. I will never not be around them I know that. xx
@@caroh2809 ruclips.net/video/lDC5rWpfqvY/видео.html
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My grandmother died last Tuesday due to stage 4 Breast Cancer. We attended the funeral today and Im crying while watching this video, Honestly I hope I will see her in my dreams just for me to know that she is already okay, Grandma I know you are happy right now but its hard to accept that you are not with us anymore, I know that I would be able to move forward but the wound is still fresh.