Calvin & Habs TOP German vs. American Compilation (TikTok & YouTube) | Part 2

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  • Опубликовано: 26 сен 2024

Комментарии • 163

  • @calvinandhabs
    @calvinandhabs  Год назад +69

    Which videos would you want to see in Part 3?

    • @ap0krypha
      @ap0krypha Год назад

      The WW2 and Nazi reference ones always get me

    • @dbro1205
      @dbro1205 Год назад +3

      The language barrier sketches

    • @fixer1140
      @fixer1140 Год назад +2

      Round glasses und the inky boys.

    • @PatriceChristian
      @PatriceChristian Год назад +1

      Creepy children's stories!

    • @kb1996
      @kb1996 Год назад +1

      The bread week skit gets me everytime😂

  • @qBeYcarpet
    @qBeYcarpet Год назад +442

    "We are not monsters. Anymore"
    Best line :D

  • @MillennialHippie
    @MillennialHippie Год назад +168

    "The entirety of Black history has been whittled down to a month, and you think you deserve the same amount of time?" Please 💀🤣

  • @112Haribo
    @112Haribo Год назад +129

    I always enjoy when the German guy gets mad and starts swearing in German. ‘Spinnst du, oder was??’

    • @mapsimp
      @mapsimp Год назад +5

      as a german speaker i must say, it’s not swearing, he’s asking: „you spider, or what?“ (or „are you crazy or something“)

    • @Alex-cc8yf
      @Alex-cc8yf Год назад +8

      "WILLST DU AUF DIE FRESSE ODER WAS??" 😂

    • @thondaar1863
      @thondaar1863 Год назад +5

      @@mapsimp *spin/weave, not spider

  • @adrielisaacs9228
    @adrielisaacs9228 Год назад +106

    I just love how Habs calls the Microwave the Hot Pocket Machine, lol. Love your vids guys, keep up the good work!

  • @miukunigunde482
    @miukunigunde482 Год назад +198

    C'mon, you're doing Calvin a huge injustice by always casting him as the American guy. We need more Austrian Calvin.

    • @mikelytou
      @mikelytou Год назад +19

      If that means we get to hear him say "gettu da choppah", I'm all for it 😉

    • @Leftyotism
      @Leftyotism Год назад +2

      Omg the Austrian!

    • @shahlabadel8628
      @shahlabadel8628 Год назад +10

      but, he is the perfect American!

    • @mapsimp
      @mapsimp Год назад +9

      for some reason Habs just feels way more german than Calvin. Calvin is more an international guy, you could cast him as anything

    • @Leftyotism
      @Leftyotism Год назад +2

      I would be in for reverse Calvin though.

  • @537zun4
    @537zun4 Год назад +391

    I hate the stereotype that germans aren't jokers, I mean no one laughs when I make silly jokes but thats just my charisma.

    • @kriegergolem
      @kriegergolem Год назад +8

      Same Here, but im Just ugly as hell

    • @DadGamingLtd
      @DadGamingLtd Год назад +6

      Did you roll a 1?

    • @537zun4
      @537zun4 Год назад +5

      @@DadGamingLtd I think I allways roll 2-5 on a 10+ skill check could be worse haven't been teared and feathered yet but still.

    • @Complex_assault
      @Complex_assault Год назад +11

      Being German automatically gives -3 to charisma, as a racial trait

    • @altenberg-greifenstein
      @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +5

      Everyone is laughing when I'm not even joking. 😐 They say I'm funny. It is very confusing. Also, I wouldn't be able to tell a joke if my life depended on it. People who are learning jokes off head to constantly tell them are very sus. Like comedians. Not that funny. Clowns are not funny either. They are probably eating little children. That said, we are surely all laughing a lot, but nobody knows about what. Most likely laughing about other people. Schadenfreude is awesome! 😏

  • @RiptornRory
    @RiptornRory Месяц назад +3

    The beer chug at the end is truly the most accurate part, being it's the subtle jokes that truly are the mark of epic people. And the comedy is all about perspective and application of situations.

  • @VenusFlytrap7
    @VenusFlytrap7 Год назад +18

    80 CONFIRMED AIR VICTORIES!

  • @kiplittle
    @kiplittle Год назад +22

    Easily the funniest and most entertaining content available. Love it!

  • @Son_of_Mandalore
    @Son_of_Mandalore 11 месяцев назад +12

    I love your content. Having lived in Germany for 16 years I loved it over there and I miss it, your content hits all the cliches and nuances spot on and I really look forward to when you release a new vid. Thanks for all the laughs...

  • @HateBlisters
    @HateBlisters Год назад +30

    i truly felt agony when you put the bacon in a damn microwave, and you could hear all the lard and the slurping and eugh... 10/10 skits

  • @NorShii
    @NorShii Год назад +10

    The horse walks into a bar gets me every time

  • @hardrout17
    @hardrout17 Год назад +13

    Loved them all', The "Red baron" pizza is my favorite! 😘

  • @orchetect7415
    @orchetect7415 11 месяцев назад +20

    As someone who has tried microwaving bacon only once to know what it is like, I fully embrace Habs’ reaction.

    • @chri-k
      @chri-k 10 месяцев назад +1

      what about microwaved pizza?

    • @proto-type3201
      @proto-type3201 10 месяцев назад +2

      ​@@chri-kyour mere existence disgusts me
      I take this comment as a personal offense to my dignity

    • @chri-k
      @chri-k 10 месяцев назад

      @@proto-type3201 i never said i am in support of that idea. I have just seen microwave instructions on a pizza once

    • @proto-type3201
      @proto-type3201 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@chri-k you are forgiven,but still:
      DISGUSTING!

    • @chri-k
      @chri-k 10 месяцев назад +1

      @@proto-type3201 it also just straight up doesn't work ( according to theory )

  • @riotsquirrelz
    @riotsquirrelz Год назад +42

    So you're not a pelican, you're a pelican't (eat that burger).

    • @poppers7317
      @poppers7317 Год назад +3

      get out!

    • @altenberg-greifenstein
      @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +1

      Jokes are funny only the first time they are told. That is why Germans aren't laughing about your joke. They can remember that they have heard the joke already.

    • @riotsquirrelz
      @riotsquirrelz Год назад

      @@altenberg-greifenstein If you expect to hear laughing when you read comments on RUclips, you may want to get checked by a doctor
      ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

  • @Falesam
    @Falesam Год назад +16

    The straight face of the German in the board meeting 😂😂

  • @dummybois
    @dummybois 10 месяцев назад +6

    "we are not monsters, *anymore*" made me laugh like crazy loll

  • @its_warner
    @its_warner Год назад +6

    As a fellow American born German, I love these

  • @hobojesus6288
    @hobojesus6288 11 месяцев назад +6

    listen we are not above eating 6 donuts in one sitting, but we dont pretend like we were meant too.

  • @rizrhys1
    @rizrhys1 Год назад +1

    I will never tire of these

  • @salvadormuro7346
    @salvadormuro7346 Год назад +4

    Thanks for the laughs! You guys are great!

  • @shark1347
    @shark1347 Год назад +4

    I told you long times ago,the villain with the sun glasses!😎

  • @Daktangle
    @Daktangle Год назад +7

    German fumbling with squirrel: Skweewll
    American: Skwerrrrl.

    • @u.s.1974
      @u.s.1974 5 месяцев назад +1

      Alright, now say the German word for Squirrel: Eichhörnchen

  • @bernadmanny
    @bernadmanny Год назад +3

    Microwave Bacon and The Red Baron are two of my favourites.

  • @Sephiroth391
    @Sephiroth391 Год назад +3

    Ok, now I need Hasselhoff poster

  • @kaitowinterson1671
    @kaitowinterson1671 Год назад +3

    I love these skits.

  • @NikuKashi
    @NikuKashi Год назад +2

    Ihr seid die besten^^

  • @SchlachtschiffBismarck
    @SchlachtschiffBismarck Год назад +17

    Alla, manchmal fühlt es sich an als würde man Känguru Chroniken hören, einfach geil und oft so unerwartet, macht weiter so.

  • @mikelytou
    @mikelytou Год назад +5

    People who make tall burgers surely go to hell when they die.

  • @Toes-_-6969
    @Toes-_-6969 Год назад +2

    Waiting for a video like this❤

  • @Bloodletter8
    @Bloodletter8 11 месяцев назад +4

    Flaccid bacon causes international pain.

  • @lorensoth4365
    @lorensoth4365 9 месяцев назад +1

    You guys are so funny. Made me miss my German friend Claus.

  • @medic_memer
    @medic_memer 4 месяца назад +1

    3:37 WAHHHH

  • @StrayKisswHobyStrayKids
    @StrayKisswHobyStrayKids 10 месяцев назад +2

    "Such much 😲"

  • @epsi
    @epsi Год назад +10

    The most American name for a pizza is "Tombstone" because the average American rushes to their death by greasy goodness.

    • @altenberg-greifenstein
      @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +1

      Pizza is from Italy. Mediterranean diet is recommended as the healthiest diet. Guess you have to give that name to a burger instead!

    • @jenniferziegenfuss3719
      @jenniferziegenfuss3719 Год назад +1

      Plus ya know....all the shootings.

    • @Bloodletter8
      @Bloodletter8 11 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@jenniferziegenfuss3719Those aren't "bullet wounds" they're "freedom holes".

    • @DatsWhatHeSaid
      @DatsWhatHeSaid 3 месяца назад

      @@altenberg-greifenstein American pizza and frozen pizza has _sh*t all_ to do with the "mediterranean diet".
      Wtf dude.

  • @pranavghantasala6808
    @pranavghantasala6808 Год назад +1

    Just finished making hello fresh corn chowder and _immediately_ went to find the clam chowder short

  • @TheRavenLord1
    @TheRavenLord1 Год назад +5

    Respect the chicken. Always respect it

  • @pikekeke
    @pikekeke Год назад +2

    Boah, ein Zusammenstellung, das ist ja geil alda!

  • @Wulfryk
    @Wulfryk 10 месяцев назад +2

    Microwave bacon will always haunt my dreams

  • @miruson
    @miruson Год назад +1

    Clam chowder still one of my favorites😂

  • @Otoger
    @Otoger Год назад +1

    Sehr tolle videos ihr beiden,

  • @berrynala8751
    @berrynala8751 2 месяца назад

    Brilliant 😂

  • @altenberg-greifenstein
    @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +4

    😂 I'm too German for this

  • @tamaveirene
    @tamaveirene 10 месяцев назад +1

    Love these guys! Esp. the German!

  • @374jr
    @374jr 9 месяцев назад

    That saucy slap 🤣

  • @laurabeth31187
    @laurabeth31187 3 месяца назад

    The Red Baron, As The Name Of The Pizza

  • @kaerithiakeshan
    @kaerithiakeshan 11 месяцев назад +3

    As a german...I feel all of this in my bones. Also it is not funny. We germans don't laugh at this. But the joke with the horse is good.

  • @slwrabbits
    @slwrabbits Год назад +2

    okay I have come back and watch this later, my rabbit is objecting to *incoherent German angry noises* as much as they crack me up I gotta pass until he's out of hearing range

  • @SebastianHasch
    @SebastianHasch Год назад

    7:00 this physically hurt me🫠

  • @rejekt2
    @rejekt2 Год назад +2

    Hoff, Hoff! :)

  • @Sohbek
    @Sohbek 10 месяцев назад

    Now I want a beer

  • @SmollRuby
    @SmollRuby Месяц назад

    10:36 das ist wie ein wahrer deutscher Bier trinkt!

  • @Peacefrogg
    @Peacefrogg 3 месяца назад

    Recycling is not a joke in germany.
    A 20% tip is too much. These people have a job and get a normal wage. It’s the law. 10% is normal. Or just rounding off. it’s expensive enough when you have to pay €3 for a glass of tap water..
    Don’t microwave bacon. Use a pan. The microwave is for 3 things only: babyfood, hot chocolate, and reheating scraps. It’s not for cooking.

  • @1jotun136
    @1jotun136 Год назад +4

    Great, but where are the BOTTOM videos?

    • @DoctorDinosaur
      @DoctorDinosaur Год назад

      Spinnst du oder was?
      There are not bottom videos!

  • @lockofmetal8894
    @lockofmetal8894 10 месяцев назад +1

    I try to drink beer but i just really hate the taste.
    Watch you drink it like it's a soda makes me feel ill just knowing how the taste would be.

    • @DatsWhatHeSaid
      @DatsWhatHeSaid 3 месяца назад

      Try better beer.
      Try a NEPA (New England Pale Ale) and report back how you liked it!

    • @lockofmetal8894
      @lockofmetal8894 3 месяца назад

      @@DatsWhatHeSaid I'm down to try, i'll see how i can get it from sweden.

  • @colla555
    @colla555 Год назад

    0:20 how say man?? Wie sagt man?? 😁🤣🤣

    • @Xiroi87
      @Xiroi87 Год назад +1

      Such much?

  • @marcelthoma8890
    @marcelthoma8890 Год назад

    Sachsen-Hildburghausen! Ich weiß, dass das lang ist. Deshalb sagen wir für Hildburghausen einfach Hibu. Also Therese von Sachsen-Hibu 😂. Aber im Ernst: Die Hildburghäuser haben ihre Theresienwiese und feiern das Theresienfest Ende September/Anfang Oktober, wie das Oktoberfest. Und noch was: Das hat zwar nichts mit der Hochzeit zu tun, aber Erfurt hat auch ein Oktoberfest.

  • @vercingetorix5708
    @vercingetorix5708 4 месяца назад

    What ever country ran the base. Unless both were citizens of the same country

  • @POIZ87
    @POIZ87 Год назад

    Wo is part 1?

  • @_Mr_Blue
    @_Mr_Blue Год назад +1

    Such much

  • @4862cjc
    @4862cjc Год назад

    03:51. Mmm! Weisswurst! Aber, keinen pomme frites?

  • @altenberg-greifenstein
    @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +2

    If it is Germans vs Americans, the Germans always win! 😐 I said always!

    • @M_4C4z
      @M_4C4z Год назад

      hitler was austrian nvm

    • @UprightBassist
      @UprightBassist Год назад

      ​@@M_4C4za geh, bist's deppat? An Orschloch wor der, und verloren hat's eh am End. Wos wuillst mit 'em, ha?🙄

    • @shahlabadel8628
      @shahlabadel8628 Год назад +1

      hands down! The German comes off as the smarter one, understandably!

    • @M_4C4z
      @M_4C4z Год назад

      But the nazis were german people

  • @PloKoonTheOne
    @PloKoonTheOne Год назад +1

    I have a question, what is the word "thick" in German?

  • @altenberg-greifenstein
    @altenberg-greifenstein Год назад +2

    I still dont understand the concept of boneless wings. How do Americans do that? It must be a scam. There is no way anyone can remove the bones without completely shredding up the meat snuggling up tight to the bones and between them!

    • @TheTerrorHamster
      @TheTerrorHamster Год назад +2

      yeah it's a scam. It's just different shaped chicken nuggets

    • @hephaestus_workshop
      @hephaestus_workshop 11 месяцев назад +2

      you can pull the bones out if you take off the cartilage right (I’ve done it with bone in wings)

  • @mihaleben6051
    @mihaleben6051 Год назад

    5:40 slovenia is in a shape of a chicken by the way.

  • @iffieaesar7620
    @iffieaesar7620 Год назад

    Wibble!!!! XD

  • @PRINCESSCUDDLY1
    @PRINCESSCUDDLY1 Год назад +1

    tbh was a bit disappointment to hear that the German speaking guy is actually American born from his natural accent. I was under the impression that two cross continental bros started this channel together. Great stuff though, loving the content

    • @chri-k
      @chri-k 10 месяцев назад +3

      i think they're both german

    • @levischorpioen
      @levischorpioen 8 месяцев назад

      @@chri-k From my understanding, one is German and one is Austrian. However, it's unclear to me if this means they're actually from those countries and later moved to the US or if they're "German" and "Austrian" the way Americans like to think they're international.

  • @treasey8655
    @treasey8655 Год назад

    I love you so much

  • @bzipoli
    @bzipoli Месяц назад

    wA-

  • @hadiabbas2992
    @hadiabbas2992 Год назад

    hello

  • @llmkursk8254
    @llmkursk8254 8 месяцев назад

    Microwaved bacon is the highest order of heresy. Not even I, a lazy American, would partake in such idiotic behavior.
    The microwave is for reheating food, not cooking!
    I shall instead starve for I am too lazy to use the oven.

  • @boahneelassmal
    @boahneelassmal 6 месяцев назад

    oah legger alda
    #isso

  • @mihaleben6051
    @mihaleben6051 Год назад

    8:08 october is the tenth month btw.

  • @androidtexts6948
    @androidtexts6948 11 месяцев назад

    Germany does not need to apologize for. Ww2 so stop it.

  • @kevinsundelin8639
    @kevinsundelin8639 3 дня назад

    Wow the line at 2:15 goes hard, goddamn, that's a good line.

  • @YourfriendlyneigborhoodAutist
    @YourfriendlyneigborhoodAutist 11 месяцев назад +4

    As a bilingual german, I approve of this content.

  • @browngaymethodistjesuschri1361
    @browngaymethodistjesuschri1361 10 месяцев назад

    We live in a weird world where we’re blessed to have people like these making comment but condemned to watch them in portrait

  • @dickrichard5579
    @dickrichard5579 Год назад +4

    In recent time I’ve began to think like the European approach to restaurant tipping far more I think it’s egregious and entitled in America

  • @piyam5000
    @piyam5000 Год назад +2

    I can't take burger places seriously at all anymore

  • @WizzoTheMagicMan
    @WizzoTheMagicMan 10 месяцев назад +30

    I love it when he says 'such much' it always makes me smile

  • @whisperofghosts6969
    @whisperofghosts6969 Год назад +56

    Them saying 'hot pocket machine' made me gaslight myself into believing 'microwave' isn't an actual English word

    • @stovebot4280
      @stovebot4280 Год назад +3

      Technically, its a microwave oven. Its called that because it emits microwaves (a form of light that you can't see) to cook the food

    • @whisperofghosts6969
      @whisperofghosts6969 Год назад

      @@stovebot4280 i just meant because 'microwave' seemed like a very literal translation of the German word, which made me think it might be just my brain making words up by making them sound English

    • @ctje1638
      @ctje1638 Год назад +7

      @@stovebot4280in Dutch we call it the magnetron cuz it works with magnets. Sounds way more badass.

    • @vanos3378
      @vanos3378 10 месяцев назад +5

      ​@@ctje1638I will from now on also call it the magnetron. 👍

    • @DatsWhatHeSaid
      @DatsWhatHeSaid 3 месяца назад

      @@ctje1638 That IS sounding way more badass!

  • @Shinobito1
    @Shinobito1 11 месяцев назад +14

    3:50 - complaining about German stereotypes while eating POLISH pickled cabbage XD

    • @PobortzaPl
      @PobortzaPl 3 месяца назад

      He totally invaded that jar, so yes, it's still a German stereotype.

  • @CloudColumncat
    @CloudColumncat Год назад +3

    7:03 His feeling is one that my great-grandfather would have known well.

  • @humanitronix
    @humanitronix 13 часов назад

    as an american, the microwave bacon move is insane. why would you do that to anyone

  • @maxime2445
    @maxime2445 Год назад +2

    Germans do have sales tax, vat, 19% roughly. It's just included in the price. So on that bottle of cola (may have a different % vat), the company has to split it. The tax and the actual money.

  • @Leftyotism
    @Leftyotism Год назад

    LOL slop bucket im dieing

  • @hadiabbas2992
    @hadiabbas2992 Год назад

    yo