being plus size on a plane ✈️ r/AITA
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- wanna be a member? grab a backstage pass! www.youtube.co...
HEY LET'S BE INTERNET FRIENDS:
Instagram @sherbetlemon007
Twitter @sherbetlemon007
TikTok @sherbetlemon007
Twitch @shaabaandjamie
Our site: shaabaandjamie . c o m
Jamie's channel: @jammidodger
Our gaming channel: @shaabaandjamie
Be kind and have a great day (:
"Ma'am, I understand that it isn't your fault. But not wanting to be in physical contact with 2 strangers for hours does not constitute "treating fatness as a disease." I didn't mean to embarrass you but I did try not to make a big deal about it while trying to make the situation more comfortable for all of us." I say this as a quite overweight person who has to research the Airbus model to make sure I can fit in the seat. Op is NOT the asshole.
For the first story, the rule is completely reasonable. In fact, at my house, even if you are an adult you don't swim by yourself, you could hit your head and drown.
Exactly! Water safety is so important and if I was a parent and my kid was being put in danger I would be absolutely furious
I agree! My family has a small above ground hot tub and we always make sure to go out in pairs. Occasionally my dad will go for a short dip on his own, but he always tells us ahead of time so it not too different than taking a bath.
Yeah, I live in rural Queensland 🇦🇺 where we have a lot of dams and we’ve had kids drown in them so I agree with OP. Bloody hell only the other day I was with my 1 year old nephew, turned away for 5 seconds to talk to my SIL and he fell and bit his lip
Accidents happen so quickly
Omg accidentally disliked your comment I’m so sorry 😅💜 (it’s fixed now) but I think that’s a really smart rule and way safer than my usual strategy of taking 0 precautions when swimming.
@@coasttocoast2011 people can drown so quickly, and can happen anywhere if you’re not careful. I saw a drowned woman be pulled out of the water of a reef beach I was visiting last week. They gave her CPR and drove off in an ambulance. I hope they brought her back to life. Her poor family was there with her but they had been snorkeling and not watching out for each other.
The lack of empathy [edit: compassion] from other people on public transit is wild. Two days ago the man sitting in front of me on a flight got angry that he physically couldn't recline his chair because my knees were in the way. I'm 6'3" and sitting all the way back in my chair, my knees brush the back of the seat in front of me when it's fully upright. He told me I should have paid the $130USD to upgrade myself to more legroom so that HE could recline HIS seat.
I don't understand people reclining their seats on planes anyways. No matter how small the person behind you is, reclining the seat will inconvenience them. There is just too little room in general.
But it's not just public transport, it's people overall. The amount of times I step off the curb, because there's a group of people taking up the entire sidewalk is unreal. And there is a tram stop in front of the building I live in.. people are standing in the entrance, have their bags, children and whatnot standing/running around while not paying attention at all. I just want to get past, why are they making it so difficult?
@@borealernadelwaldso true! It seems like everyone expects you to get out of the way as if they don't know how to walk in a slightly different way for a few seconds.
This reminds me too that they don't even move for blind people 😭 a blind person uploaded like a body cam video of them walking home from a shopping centre type thing and no one left them any space to walk! And someone with a pram didn't move until the last second and even gave them a dirty look 😭
I feel like after all the lockdowns and covid pandemic shenanigans, people have become more selfish instead of more considerate (edited to fix my wording xD)
I've seen in multiple places online the fact that the concept of "empathy" is far too nebulous/vague of a term to be of much use nowadays; so i'll clearly define it as "the ability to perceive how others are feeling" (nothing more, nothing less).
I think most people conflate empathy with compassion, which implies that the person empathizing actually _gives a shit_ about how the empathee feels, enough to actually do something about it, but i think it's the latter that most people mean when they say "empathy".
As someone who struggles with empathy in most of its most practical forms, and also has quite the bone to pick with it in terms of ableism and even objectification (in the sense that one might feel entitled to the intimate understanding of the inner workings of someone else, otherwise given very little context, especially not verbal; as a side note, i don't know how else to explain that icky feeling i get other than "objectification" or otherwise "prying");
but even then, i feel there's a huge difference between being unable to empathize with someone and being _unwilling_ to do so - which, i guess is what most people seem to use "empathy" to describe: the ability + unwillingness to empathize, and, to take it a step further, to be compassionate based on this perceived emotional state (which, by the way, could very well be wrong, and i feel often is - which likely explains the "ick" i get when people try to empathize with me instead of _communicate_ with me).
TL;DR: inconsiderate ≠ unempathetic
(Also, yes, i am autistic, thanks for asking. Have a nice day lmao)
@@lyrablack8621 very true! That also brings up another point that a lot of autistic people (me included xD) do in fact have empathy or sometimes are even more empathetic than allistics, yet we display this differently so it gets written off as us having no empathy or no emotions, etc.
Ugh the plane seats. My husband is a big guy and we were recently on a seven-hour flight. We specifically booked "preferred seats", which supposedly have more room. Please note: these were more expensive seats, by quite a bit.
We board the plane and discover that the "preferred seats" are made in such a way that the armrests can't be lifted. My husband literally could not sit there. And I do mean literally. When we finally managed to get someone's attention, they pulled a face and just asked the people behind us if they'd mind switching with us because "it would be more convenient for these people" (paraphrased, translated from French). So we did switch with the people behind us, who basically got a free upgrade while we were out a hundred bucks. Also... "convenient"? No no no no. This wasn't "more convenient". It was the only fucking way the plane would be able to take off. I hate airline companies so much, I swear the size of these seats was absolutely ridiculous.
If you are wider never book the exit row seats. The armrests often don't move. Learned that the hard way.
@@firemermaid1980as a taller guy, I've always preferred the exit row because it typically has more leg room and the armrests move making it easier to evacuate. Fixed armrests on the exit rows would be a safety hazard.
@sonicpsycho13 the fixed armrest is usually on big planes going longer distance. I just know I have experienced it and seen it a lot of times after that as I look at them to check.
@@firemermaid1980 Honestly if you're not relatively fit and healthy looking you risk being moved out of the exit rows anyway. They want passengers who can help rather than hinder in that exit row so they WILL quietly judge and make unpleasant calls.
As a plus size person (UK24) I would be absolutely delighted if the person in the middle seat moved away, as both of us would be more comfortable! I am fat. People look at me and see I am fat. It is not like if the person didn't move, people would look at me and think "that's a thin girl!!". Fatphobia is a problem and internalised fatphobia exists (I would argue that's the case, with the info given). I do get annoyed when people are rude, or make a show of being uncomfortable as if I am close to them by choice. But moving and making both of us comfortable, absolutely the right thing to do.
Totally, if she had complained to them and threw a fit, I would understand the asshole label, but quietly changing seat is a blessing for the three people in the story ^^
Right? Sounds like the best solution for all 3 people to make that middle seat open.
Came here to say this exact same thing! I would also appreciate all of us being more comfortable. (If it matters, I am also plus sized.)
Honestly, as someone who is very plus sized, you said it well. The thing to be mad at is how small and not accomodating airline seats are, and like plenty of people have said it sucks for pretty much everyone
As a former lifeguard and someone who does water safety for my youth volunteer work, people really should not swim alone. But of course adults can make their own choices in their own home and property. Accidents are just that, unexpected emergency.
Were I one of the plus size people with my body actually resting on someone else, I would be a lot more comfortable if that person weren't there, so I would have been happy when they sat somewhere else. Heck even if I was a skinny mini I would still be happy to have an empty seat instead of a stranger sardined in beside me.
However if I had a huge insecurity (and we all do, I think), and someone used it as a reason not to be near me, it would definitely hurt. In fact, because of the insecurity, I'd probably be more likely to think it was the reason, even if it weren't the case, or I had no actual evidence from which to draw that conclusion.
Ultimately I still think it is a strange position to take: "I'm having a social discomfort issue so I expect you to have a physical discomfort issue so as to put me at ease."
Honestly it just seems like a misunderstanding to me, like the passenger just seemed so used to far phobia that it's what they immediately assumed, ya know.
@@thewickeddevilofthewest I know my social anxiety and paranoia ass would assume that instantly. I would spend the rest of the flight arguing with my horrible brain the entire time about why they moved. It would be hell for me, but guess what? That's my own personal hell and has nothing to do with someone else's actions. This is on my bad mental health. This is why I am in therapy.
Wish more parents were like the ones in the first story. The amount of times I have had to monitor strangers kids at pools and lakes because their parents are drunk and ignoring their kids....
For the second story, obviously no issue there, was ops seat.
FOr the third, I'm plus size, and I'm going to guess the flight attendent worded things rudely, or the woman's confidence was hit by the person moving. OP isn't an AH, wanting to have a comfortable trip where strangers aren't touching you the whole time is completely valid.
I used to be obese, but now I’m thin, and I’ve flown a few times in both bodies. I used to have to ask for a seat belt extender, I was so big. But I sat next to my (then) young daughter and encroached a little (okay, a lot) into her seat, so luckily I didn’t squeeze out a stranger. Regardless, I was always hyper-conscious of how much space I was taking up.
Today, being 220+ lbs lighter than I was four years ago, I fit comfortably in airplane seats, but I feel compassion for those who don’t. The airlines are absolutely at fault, by not offering at least a few rows of wider accommodations, and making people buy two seats for their one body, so they can fit comfortably. We’re all packed in like sardines, and it’s ridiculous!
If OP was truly discreet in asking to be seated elsewhere, then I can’t fault them. The large passenger had no right to berate OP upon arrival, that passenger was making assumptions solely based on how she felt about herself. NTA, and airlines, wake up and accommodate all sizes!!!
In the first story, it’s actually a bad idea to wear armbands, wear a life jacket if you can’t swim.the armbands can create a situation where you’re head is under water but the arms are stuck held up
This happened to me when I was 3 years old. I almost d!ed. Use a life vest!
All my love to the girl who gets motion sickness ❤😭 Aside from the fact that if you pay for a certain seat you should get what you paid for, I have been struggling with severe motion sickness my whole life. I hate the fact people just assume because I look like a "healthy young woman" overall they feel entitled to question where I sit or how "picky" I am. To me, the least horrible seats are the ones at the front or mid-coach, where you have more space in front of you, and of course most people love them, so I always make sure I show up early for the bus to get in and pick my seat if I can't reserve them. It really makes all the difference, I wish people would either mind their business or try to be more empathetic 😢
EDIT: this also relates to the last one in a way, I don't have problems on planes but if I were squeezed between two people (not necessarily plus size, any tall broad guy would barely fit in the majority of seats because low-cost companies SUCK BIG TIME) on a bus or a train it would make both my anxiety and motion sickness spike instantly. I am not small myself and often barely fit into seats, and I would completely understand if someone who has similar issues as mine would need more space. Again, fuck airlines and all other companies who keep cutting on space🤘🏻
I get horrible motion sickness if I am not the one driving. So I always drive if I go out with friends. It was horrible growing up with my parents who did not care to understand the issue. They mocked me, grounded me for "making a fuss", called me stupid. "Oh it's all in your head, just get over it!"
All while my dad is the worst driver in history and is actively swerving in and out of traffic at 100mph and making me violently ill. After growing up with that my whole life I refuse to let others drive me anymore. I cannot stand it.
@@StudlyFudd13my parents did just one time not take my motion sickness seriously, after me getting white like a board and almost throwing up in the car it was the general rule: when a person in the car says they need a stop they need a stop and the car will leave the high way at the next truck stop.
@hannajung7512 they took me throwing up as me being irresponsible and not doing the right thing and just holding it in. Also was called sensitive for not just getting over it. If i threw up i got in trouble when we got home.
@@StudlyFudd13I don’t have motion sickness, but my body can randomly react to food just cause, even though it was fine the day before. So I know with vomit, you can’t just “hold it in”. Once it’s coming up, it’s coming out shortly after. The way your parents treated you as irresponsible and sensitive for it is just wrong. My parents would have pulled over at the soonest safe opportunity. You should never be punished for a bodily function going wrong that you can’t control.
@@StudlyFudd13 Aaaand now I want to thwack your parents about the ears. I have family members like that. I'm so sorry that your parents are/were like that. Virtual hugs of understanding, if you want them.
People need to treat water with far more respect than they do. My grandparents were swim teachers all their lives. My mom and I were both put through all the training, and I new every way to save a grown person by the age of 10 and had to do so for all the tests... I would consider myself a good swimmer....and still... I've nearly drowned. Granted it was a river, not a pool, and an under current (I'm not sure if that is what it's called in English) but I got pulled so far down and around that, I didn't know up from down.... Water is dangerous.... a simple leg cramp and you're done.... so please always watch your kids, even if the water isn't deep....
Under current is the right term :)
@@Ruthavecflute Thank you :)
yes. also im guessing youre bilingual, from the comment about the phrase in english, if so mad props to you, learning a new language is so hard ❤
greatly agree the real AH is the airline with their tiny seats
They're just doing business, just like every other unethical company.
the biggest ah of all is capitalism
I'm a plus-sized person, and I'm always so self-conscious of how much space I take up on couches or chairs or whatever, whether lounging at a friend's place or at a theatre / on a flight. I would feel so embarrassed if someone felt "squished" and wanted to move for their comfort, but I certainly wouldn't berate them after the flight over it. It's not their fault that public accommodations are getting smaller all the time for the sake of corporate greed. Sure, it's possible that OP made the situation more obvious than they are letting on, but based on the info available, I'm guessing this other person is embarrassed about their size and the unfairness of size non-accomodation and decided to take it out on OP, which is completely unfair. NTA.
It’s not getting smaller. People are just getting fatter.
@@magnarcreed3801 - Whatever you choose to tell yourself at night.
@@Rikrobat realize that's not the point of your comment but I just wanted to say that you shouldn't have to feel embarrassed either, when you're taking up space.
Any normal thinking person knows that we all have a physical body and it takes up a certain amount of space and people, and it sucks that we as a society make people ashamed for that.
(I hope this didn't come off as me berating you, I am berating the people who made you feel ashamed for... *checks notes* existing in a 3-dimensional space?)
@Rikrobat You're mad that they tell themselves the truth? Look it up, plane seats have gotten wider over the last 30 years, and people are still blaming the seats and not the standard American diet.
@@IsraBeezy - Thank you, I do understand what you meant and I appreciate your words. 🥰
As a larger person I would be relieved if the person next to me on a plane was able to move somewhere more comfortable. Better for them and better for me as I now have more space too.
For the last one, it's definitely airlines that are to blame. Plus sized people have a right to travel and also everyone has a right to have their space to themselves. I'm narrow framed (possibly due to a medical condition) so for me it isn't usually an issue, I take up half the seat anyway. But others aren't.
Equally nobody should be forbidden from flying or made to buy 2 seats to travel for that
Well, life is all about money.
People do whatever they can to get their hands on as much money as possible.
@@ShinyTillDawn
Life does not have to be all about money. Even for some of us in the USA it is not all about money.
Not every person does whatever they can to get their hands on as much money as possible.
In the case of airline seats, most or all of the people gaining from making the seat space smaller are already well-off or rich.
Let's encourage people to choose compassion and morality over getting even richer.
yeah me too, im super skinny but everything still sucks in one way or another
Buy two seats or a upper class not tourist since y’all don’t want to lose some weight lmfao we are not making bigger planes for lazy people💀💀
Being plus-sized is why I haven't flown in more than 20 years. I'm terrified of what my husband and I will find, if we do fly! He has saved a bunch of money for us to travel, but this issue is really a hang up for me. I think the poster handled things perfectly well, and I'm less scared of other people's opinions than the straight up fact that airlines are making this harder for us.
I find that more flight attendants are more understanding than not. Go see the world. I book aisle seats for myself as that can help, but avoid exit rows as sometimes armrests don't move.
At 6' 350lb, I was fine flying economy from Raleigh, North Carolina to Guanajuato, Mexico. As a man, my biggest problem is really my shoulders, so I typically try to book a window seat, so I can learn against the outer bulkhead.
Just go for it.
As a plus sized person who regularly flys, I don’t think it is unreasonable for someone to move in that situation. As Shaaba said, as long as you’re not making a song and dance about it, I don’t think there is a problem. What I will say, and I’ve seen a couple of others here say the same, is that I am so aware of myself in confined spaces with others. When I fly, if I am seated next to someone I contort myself away to the best of my ability. I will anchor my hand on my seatbelt to hold my arm/shoulder away from them, angle myself away from them if I can do my thighs don’t touch them. I haven’t always been this big and when I was smaller I sat next to plus sized people who would take up half of my space too and it was really uncomfortable, I never want to put someone in that position. Also, having to touch stranger is the worst! I’ve been lucky recently, and i check in at the desk, this has resulted in a lot more instances of me being on the aisle, the middle seat being empty and then someone on the window. I think, where they can, airlines (or at least the attendants) do try to accommodate for comfort.
TLDR: as long as you’re not an asshole, moving is fine.
First story: teenagers, even 18 year olds aren't always very aware or responsible when it comes to watching younger siblings when there's fun to be had. You need someone outside the pool or activity putting 💯 into being focused on the young ones.
im a simple girl, i see shaaba posted, i click! she always makes my day a little brighter :)
3rd story, I don't think OP is the asshole there but I also think probably the lady isn't either. She probably just has a lot of instances similar where people weren't nice and is perhaps overly sensitive to it. And then had however many hours to sit and stew in her embarrassment and internalised fatphobia. I'm not saying her behaviour was okay but also I get it.
I am disabled and even if everyone is being really nice about me and my mobility scooter I still feel like I am taking up way too much space. When I went to a club for the first time I almost fainted and I had to lie down on the floor (had to be horizontal so the blood went back to the upper part of my body) and the bouncer ended up escorting me downstairs to the outside area where it was cooler. A girl I was on a first date with had to bring me water and my friends all stopped dancing to come and sit with me. Everyone was nice but I was mortified and if I had been to less therapy and was less in control of my reactions to emotions I might have lashed out. I'm pretty sure a lot of people (not the people I was with) thought I was on hard drugs of some description.
Edit: I can walk, ambulatory wheelchair users exist. I use a cane when not in my scooter and I'm out the house.
I’m sure your friends enjoyed being out with you. I know if one of my friends got disabled, I would stay friends with them as I enjoy their company, enjoy doing activities with them and love their personalities. I am sure your friends feel the same way about you.
the second story is something i relate to so much as a person with severe motion sickness, i have to take medicine, be in a spot with cold air, have a window seat, etc. so much goes into me trying to survive on a moving vehicle just like op. (unlike op though i am very bad at advocating for myself to kudos to op)
That bus story hit hard, I live with my mom, sister, and grandparents and I’m disabled. I’m constantly expected to give up things I need to be safe and healthy for my grandparents because they’re older and my mom feels responsible for their comfort. And of course their are situations where they have genuine needs because of their age but it’s often their preferences being put over my needs and it’s so hard, I really feel for that poor girl.
Last story: clearly not the asshole.
Even for both people originally seated next to OP, this situation could not have been comfortable (having their legs and armsoverlaping and all).
Changing seats is a solution that made everyone more comfortable for a long flight and from what she said (again, her side of the story), she did it with discretion and privacy.
I understand why the passenger would feel uncomfortable about the situation but they have to put things into perspective too.
(and clearly, the only asshole here is the airline)
Shaaba thank you for validating my childhood and ongoing grievance with my parenta who smoked inside. I had an inhaler for a year because of it
I can’t imagine having a parent who smokes. I react to the tiniest amount of cigarette smoke with coughing and wheezing. I don’t know how I would have managed if there was smoke around me all the time in my house. I hope you’re doing better now and are out of that situation.
For the last one, I'd like to bring up an old phrase because it feels applicable to the situation: You know what happens when you assume.
Then entitelment of elderly people JUST because they are older is really something that's not ok with me.
I have absolutely no problem telling an elderly to stay in their lane and stop being disrespectful if they are. So many of them lack education it's actually crazy and people let it go "because they are old"!
HELL NAH!! Not with me!
I absolutely don't care about the age of someone. Respect goes both ways. If a 5yo is respectful to me, I'll respect them. If a 95yo is not respectful, I won't respect them.
The first one - I have a small poll in my house, and my parents have a similar role, but since I'm 17 and my middleset sister is 14 (our younger sister is 8) me and my middleset sister can be in the pool without them if we're not alone (like if one of us have friends over or we're in there together). They don't even let us be in the pool alone with our youngest sister, I cannot imagine letting 4 kids be alone in a pool when the oldest is 11
Especially since it's been happening for 3 years, meaning the oldest would have been EIGHT when grandma decided they didn't need adult supervision.
With the going inside to smoke my guess may be to smoke Marijuana perhaps? Otherwise thats just odd because even if you prefer smoking inside....you're not gonna melt if you smoke outside wth. Signed, Someone who loathes smoking outside but does most of the time.
Hey shaaba have you thought of adding chapters for each story? I think it would help if someone wanted to go to a specific story. Either way just an idea and I love your vids!
I would love chapters! Some of her old ones have them iirc, very helpful for jumping back to stories as they're mentioned in the comments!
Shoot, last time I was on a plane (2017) my knees were smashing into the seat back. I’m 5’, so can’t imagine what a 6’ person would do. Hadn’t traveled in more than 10 years, when it was relaxed and fun. What a complete change in everything.
First story: My parents wouldn't let us be in a pool unsupervised by an adult until we were 16 years old. I had taken swimming lessons since I was 1 years old. I am a strong swimmer. Still my parents were very strict about being supervised by an adult. I often hated this because I would get called all sorts of names and often missed out on going to birthday parties where there would be swimming and no guarantee of an adult around. Whenever I was in the pool and the adult supervising stepped away, I would get out of the pool because that's just how it worked in my life. Now that I am older, I completely understand my parents's point of view. Any body of water can be unpredictable. Anything can happen. It takes a split second for something to go wrong. To ignore that fact is careless. Should we completely fear water and never step foot in it? No. But safety needs to be the number one priority. OP isn't the A-hole and good on her and her husband for raising kids who are honest even if it means that they may not be able to have as much fun or grandma might get in trouble.
Second story: If I reserve the window seat, then I get the window seat. Yes if I didn't need to sit next to the window, I probably would have let the woman continue sitting there. But if I have to sit in the window seat and I reserve it, it's mine. Also the woman seemed to be okay with moving, so why is this an issue? Also the older generation thinking that the younger generation are a bunch of disrespectful people is getting old. Doesn't matter their age, race, religion, gender identity, sexual preferences people are people and everyone deserves to be treated with respect, but you are not owed respect more than the next person. If you treat people disrespectfully, you can't expect them to treat you with respect simply because you're older. Life doesn't work that way. OP is definitely not the A-hole.
Third story: As a plus-sized woman, I am always self-conscious and I can understand where this woman is embarrassed and feels like all eyes may have gone to her and the other plus-sized passenger. However, I honestly would have just let it go and not bother confronting them afterward because I would feel like that would cause a scene and further any embarrassment that I felt prior. If OP is telling the story correctly, there was no public outburst about needing to move because they were next to plus-sized passengers. OP discretely asked if they could move and while the task of moving would have no doubt drawn some attention, there's nothing wrong with that. Odds are people already noticed that these people were plus-sized. They either would have already been talking amongst themselves about it or not. OP moving wouldn't have changed it. OP is not the A-hole and even though this woman can't see it right now (or ever), OP made the flight better for everyone involved including her and the other plus-sized passenger by giving everyone some more room to be comfortable.
Bro is the grandma going in to smoke weed or something?! That’s the only thing I can think going in to smoke for lmao other than obviously just not wanting to watch the kids
As a plus size person who flies a couple times a year I always book an aisle seat so I can lean into the aisle most of the time. Around a year ago when flying there were two seats to each side and the person on the other aisle and my window were traveling together so I offered to switch aisle seats. They were grateful. The issue is as I did this the person I was now going to sit next to hit the bell for help and made a bit of a deal about not being comfortable next to me. She got moved and it was embarrassing. Also it was a 45 min flight and she was next to a window. Again I get the a5seat so I can lean out so I am less of a problem. In the USA they are looking into making a minimum seat width around 20 in. My understanding is currently they are around 17 in.
17 inches?! I knew they felt stupidly small the last few times I flew but damn. I'm a size 12-14 and I can fit in a 17 inch but it's not comfortable. The office hair I'm sitting on right now is 19 inches and it doesn't have arm rests.
People keep bemoaning the "obesity generation" re this issue & yes it's absolutely an epidemic! But I think people are missing the fact that better health & nutrition have led to humans in general getting taller, which proportionally usually means wider too, if only in the shoulders where they'll still overlap their seat mates? So the airlines' greed driven push for less individual space on planes (look at 1950s travel!!) seems to be flying against a general trend of human shape...? Even the narrowness of the aisles on the A320s is distressing, as an average sized person!
Wow. I can not understand an adult person even thinking it is ok to take their eyes off kids whilst swimming. It only takes seconds to drown. The oldest kid isn’t even old enough to babysit at that age. If they were older and knew CPR and had lifeguard training, yea maybe in a few years, but OMG NOOO! I was nearly drowned in a neighbors pool as a child because a pool float was pushing me against the side and I had no where to go. And in another neighbors pool my next door neighbor that we were best friends with did drown and died on the last day of school whilst her brother was in the pool and the adults were there, but she hit her head or had or something and the adults were drunk but there watching and she still died. The only reason I can imagine going inside to smoke is if she was smoking weed inside the house and wasn’t doing it in front of the kids? Otherwise who would choose to smoke inside as opposed to smoking outside, but again don’t smoke in front of kids. And lastly, parents say over rules grandmas. Always. Re: motion sick on buses, me and my sister both get motion sick, she is worse than me and ALWAYS reserves the front window seat and has even gotten to the bus early to make sure no drama or has even volunteered to be the bus trip coordinator if it was a planned trip through her work. You reserve a seat, you get that seat. Respect isn’t a given. Re: airplane seats… tricky subject but it sounds like she wasn’t dramatic or loud about the seat switch. It sucks but it might have been some internalized fat phobia or shame? The plus sized passenger just might have assumed the worst because it has happened before. So it is tricky maybe she could have said something like she needs to get some sleep and the flight attendant said there was a seat available on an end or window and she needed to have a little more room ro stretch out. I dunno. That flight from Vegas to the east coast is long ugh. So no one was the asshole in that case I think?
As a fat person myself, I personally would actually be grateful for the person moving because I would be uncomfortable as well. If there's overlap the person in the middle isn't the only one experiencing that.
2:44 good gravy if I had a pool *I* wouldn't want any kids in there unsupervised. We have a little hot tub and I make my first grader get out if I need to run in the house.
So agree with you on the 2nd one Shaaba! I worked at a theatre which is mostly patronized by seniors, and SO many of them were very rude and demanding, especially regarding seating arrangements. They would ask us to move other people who bought their seats way beforehand to somewhere else because THEY want those seats. Like...if you wanted that seat so much why did you wait until the day beforehand when the show is basically sold out? We've also had senior groups book off a large section of seats, and the able-bodied people in their group would sit in the handicapped seats even though there were others in the group with wheelchairs, walkers, or seeing-eye dogs who needed to be in them. When we would then ask them to move so those people could have the seats, they would get all annoyed and say "why can't they just sit somewhere else?"
public transport is wild... ive literally had people PICK UP my bag from the seat next to me and hand it to me so they could sit down. even when other seats and double seats were available.........
My big self had the middle seat on a flight. I was in between 2 very nicely (expensive) dressed middle aged men. I was wearing a cloak over my outfit. The men were horrified when i said please excuse me i am the middle seat. The aisle seated man first asked if i was wearing a cape then fat shamed me. He got so angry that my cloak touched his tweed suit. I literally had to talk to myself to get through the moment. I literally wanted to die!
Yeah, that's why I don't believe the person in the plane story was "discreet"
oh my, the seat thing... I travel by train a lot and like to reserve one of the seats with a table in the bike compartment/baby stroller part. There are literally only two and then a couple places reserved for people with wheelchairs. I like to be in the quieter area. But the amount of times I've had people in my seat who simply didn't move! Mostly mothers with children being terribly rude. From "but our bikes are here too" to "but these seats are reserved for families!" (which is wrong). Ffs, reserve your seats! It costs money, and I'm not a millionaire (in that case, I'd be in first class anyway).
As a plus sized person as well, as much as I love the convenience of air travel, I hate the sardine packing in the seats that happens and how inconvenient it is to even sit down. If it’s a short enough flight I do everything in my power to get a window seat so I can squeeze myself against the wall and not be an inconvenience to the person to my left, or if it’s a long flight I get an aisle seat so getting up to use the restroom doesn’t cause an inconvenience to the others sitting with me. I’m not a big fan of touching people or feeling like I’m in their bubble, so I will do everything in my power to avoid it even if it puts me in an uncomfortable position.
That being said, the poster is very much not the asshole here, so long as it’s like they suggested and they didn’t make a show of it (which I trust likely is the case, I just know we’re usually only getting one side of the story here). I would be absolutely embarrassed and self conscious if someone else had to move, by all means. I would assume it was me, and was probably my size. But that’s the woes of a capitalistic society that puts profits over public comfort and health (I emphasize it’s a health issue as well, because that type of constriction can increase risk of blood clots in all body types), not of the person who needed more space.
As a plus size person I would be really uncomfortable if I spilled over to someone else so I would have been so grateful if someone moved! I still fit in on seat on the planes but it’s not with a marginal…
OOF I feel the 2nd story, big time. I also get severe motion sickness migraines (have since I was little), and motion sickness medication makes my motion sickness WORSE (I know, a weird reaction!!), so I absolutely CAN NOT sit somewhere I can't see the road/air/wherever else. Either I have to do that, or I have to be the one driving. Most people are understanding of this, but I went on a long plane trip to the UK with some classmates in undergrad. On the plane ride back home, there was this one girl who was SO stuck up bc she had to swap seats with me so I could look out the window. She didn't have a problem with it when we first boarded, because I told her "Hey, I get really bad migraines if I can't see outside, can I pls have the window seat?" and she said yes. Then halfway through the flight, she suddenly changed her tone and said "Hey, that's MY seat. I was assigned THIS seat." and I had to tell her again that "we agreed to swap seats bc of my motion sickness". She wasn't having it. I actually did have to get snippy with her and say "do you WANT me to puke on you bc of how nauseous I could get?"
While yes, I was exaggerating a small bit, I didn't see any other way to get through to her (she was one of those types that was obviously raised to be a spoiled brat who always got her way). She ended up moving entirely, probably bc she didn't want me throwing up on her expensive shoes XD
Sadly I did end up getting a migraine on the plane ride, and it would've been even worse if I hadn't been sitting by the window.
I think the person complaining about the person moving seats on the plane was the asshole honestly. You don't know their reason for moving. They could have an anxiety condition that makes physical contact with strangers agony. And that's just the first thing I can think of. I know learning to not think everyone is judging you constantly is hard but it's a valuable lesson the complainer seems to need to learn still
She's your typical Karen.
This! With my autism I can't stand someone touching me, not even a little bit. It sucks that the other person felt like op was judging or something but it wasn't right of them to make a fuss afterwards
Dude the first pool story- My parents didn’t set any rules for ours (Granted, everyone here is in college outside of the third grader), but I made it a very strong expectation to not leave ANYONE alone there.. No questions asked, and no exceptions
It’s just because as you said,,, It doesn’t take long at ALL for something to go very horrifically wrong
For the second story: sometimes window sits cost more? So booking a cheaper sit and demanding the "younger person" gives up their booked window seat is an asshole move. Also "only elderly people are allowed to demand respect" mentality is bs. I agree, respect is earned.
I've had the opposite situation to the last one. I have a rather terrible case of Raynaud's disease, which means I am extremely cold nearly all of the time because of my circulation. I remember a time on a bus when a plus-sized woman got on and the only seat available was the one next to pocket sized me. She sat down and started apologizing profusely. I looked up at her and said, "I don't mind you taking up space if you don't mind me taking some of your heat, because I'm freezing." She laughed, put her arm around me, held me close to her for the rest of the trip. I was cozy and she was comfortable. Obviously that would not work in most cases, and I'm well aware of that, but plus-sized people should never have to feel like they need to apologize for taking up space, and they should always be made to feel comfortable and welcome. In a world where people are getting larger we should be accommodating and reflecting that in all areas of life, such as seating on any form of public transport.
On the airline one, OP moving gave the other passengers more space as well, so I'm not sure why they weren't pleased with not having to touch other people too.
Shaaba has a whole lot of wisdom. Clearly I do not, as I was unaware of the saying 'Painting the Stroke for the Big Large Stroke'
It's so frustrating when people are so entitled to things that are theirs.
Its really not okay to expect others to give you things that they need. you are also not entitled to know why they need what you do. If someone tells you they need something you want, then just move on, because neither you nor anyone else needs to no why. It is none of you business.
I hate flying by plane. Lol. I’m also visually impaired and use a white cane. I can’t read read my ticket because of it. So I always opt in to do the preboard so a flight attendant can help me find my seat. I had one incident on a plane were the flight attendant put me in the wrong seat. So when that passenger arrived I had to explain my disability and the fact that the attendant put me there. This person made a huge deal out of it saying how people with disabilities were entitled jerks. It was low-key awful, really makes me wonder what was going through that person’s head to have such a reaction.
as a larger person, i would have been quietly grateful for the person sitting next to me to be moved, best case scenario really. however, if she knew you asked to move because of her (and the other person's size), then you were probably not as subtle as you thought in your asking. on the other-other-hand... she might have been hyper-aware of you and your actions because its such an uncomfortable and shamed position to be in, so maybe SHE thought you had been less-subtle than you actually were as well? Maybe a wash all around.
But agreed, the airlines make the seats so small and uncomfortable in the hopes that people will spring for a first-class upgrade so they can charge three times the price for 15% more space.
Found you from Jamie's videos, and I'm so glad. You both are two of the sweetest and wholesome people out there. I love your videos, especially the AITA ones are super fun, and you help people being better human beings. Congratulations for all your hard work and happy pride! ❤
The bus one grinds my gears, i also get stupidly nauseated while traveling
"Oh, sorry! I didn't mean to embarrass you. I was just thinking that it is horrible that airlines don't provide appropriate seating for all body types, and that the only way you and your friend could be comfortable would be to have a seat empty between you, instead of having to rest bits of yourself on a complete stranger. I apologize for not explaining when I moved that I was concerned for your comfort."
I mean, you were also concerned for your comfort, but that isn't the helpful part of things to bring up.
It would really be responsible for airlines to have a few wider seats on each plane for people who are larger and/or have medical reasons.
For example, this summer, I was facing the possibility of a double mastectomy that would have taken place a few weeks before a long flight. This would have limited the number of positions in which I could sit for a 3.5 hour flight as well as my ability to handle my own carry-ons, and it would require me to reach into my shirt to exchange ice packs or adjust bindings at least once per flight, which would be very uncomfortable for the people next to me, in whose face my elbow would likely land.
It would be better to give everyone reasonable amounts of space, but I understand that greed is a thing.
Honestly, I'm so tired of plus size people being the crutch of criticism. I think sometimes people need to realize that just because they don't find someone attractive doesn't mean you get to respect them less, thats just trashy.
Lmao you say that like it’s just attraction. They eat more, cost more healthcare money, usually are shitter at work, and cannot handle the consequences of their actions just because they eat too much. Their gluttony and life style that burdens everyone is what makes them undeserving of respect.
implying fat people can't be attractive?
Yes, agreed. I don’t like touching strangers either, but I think what sucks so much about this kind of situation is that fat people are ALWAYS uncomfortable in public spaces that were not designed for us. That airplane seat is going to be uncomfortable whether or not someone is sitting next to us, and we just have to live with it. Whether or not OP is accurately describing how discreet the seat change really was, I think it’s likely that the person who confronted them was just at the end of their rope. It just kind of sucks to see smaller people being unwilling to tolerate the consequences of bad design that we have to live with every day for a few hours, then act like they’re doing us a favor. NAH, just opportunities for learning and empathy.
@@violetsnotroses3640
It’s not bad design. They just need to stop eating so damn much. The world is built fine. It’s worked for most people for a long ass time until some people got greedy and lazy. It’s called consequences. Hopefully it’s so unbearable they change for the better. Until then…
Stop bitching about shit you can change.
@@magnarcreed3801 you think the world doesn't change? You say it's worked fine for years but we don't live in the sane world we did even 20 years ago. Things get smaller and smaller and it's gonna get to the point where no one can sit comfortably.
And also, that's a dumb argument. So people in wheelchairs should just walk because it's unreasonable to expect wheelchair ramps or elevators?
That's ridiculous. The world would be so much easier if we all had the same needs, but that's not the way it is, so businesses have a responsibility to be accommodating.
But enjoy your 0 likes LMAO
The second story reminded me of three of my own:
1) I feel for the OP. My older sister needed to take dramamine, and always got the front seat when we went on trips that lasted more than half an hour.
2) If I can, I always get the window seat on flights. It's not because I get air or motion sickness, or any other medical reason; it's because once I've sat down, I rarely (as in only once, maaaybe twice) have needed to get up for any reason until the flight is over. I also have never felt that compulsory need to get up immediately that most passengers seem to have, as soon as the cabin lights come on.
3) [This is the longer story] When I 20-21 years old, lived in the Seattle area, I used to take their bus system to get everywhere. I'd get a window seat, put my headphones in, wait for my next stop, and generally ignored the world around me.
The problem came about when, between my stops, an elderly woman boarded the bus. Evidently there were no open seats, so she used the handholds. I didn't notice her, as again, I wasn't paying attention to those around me. The only reason I found out about my apparent faux pas was some irate Irish woman (at least that's how I remember her accent) offered the elderly lady her seat, then loudly began to berate me for not doing the same.
At the time I was not only young, but I identified as male. So that's a whole other part of it. But she also accused me of seeing the old woman board, which I persistently denied, but she somehow knew I had from where she sat. This persisted until the Irish woman got to her stop. It was embarrassing. I still contend I did nothing wrong, & it was over 30 years ago. 😢
OMFG, those new double decker airplane seats would drive me absolutely nuts. I'm a pretty small person, I'm never at a lack for legroom on flights, but I *still* feel crammed. Especially for those +10hr flights. I also sometimes get incredibly motion sick, and that causes my body temperature to go all over the place and the cramped spaces make it worse. Now I feel like I have to do all my travelling before those horrible things become the new norm.
I can so resonate with the bus sickness one. Even for 20 min journeys i go super nauseous and dizzy and need window seats to not pass out when i stand. I also always sit in priority seats so I don't have to walk whilst the bus is moving cus it will make me nearly faint and feel ill for the rest of the day. My biggest worry is someone trying to get me to move as it's all invisible disabilities.
For the last one. I’m quite small but I absolutely hate people touching me on seats and stuff if I don’t know them. Planes are uncomfortable for everyone and for plus sized people in particular but wanting to move isn’t fatphobic. I would ask to move if people next to me were talking offensively about issues that impact me or people i know. Obviously the person she was sitting next to did nothing wrong but if there’s a spare seat I don’t see the issue. Both people get there personal space.
First story: I think the grandmal uses smoking inside (for "dry cigarettes"?) as an excuse because she wants time away from the kids. From what little description we have of her, I get feeling like that. She gets stressed, and nervous maybe from the kids specifically or in general, and feels she needs and deserves a break, so she takes it. And the cigs just provide somwhat if a justfication in her mind.
1st story: supervised swimming is a logical rule. To the comment that shamed them for trusting the grandma at first, I don't blame them. I would trust my mom with my kids, no question. That would change if she acted like this one.
2nd story: I agree totally with your take, except the woman who was in the seat wasn't TA. The phrasing kept going back to sound like her entitlement. This friend just needs to shut it and mind their own business. They had no reason to get involved, even if the woman complained to her.
3rd story: I am disabled. I know that sitting next to me may not always be comfortable. If you are not a jerk about it and feel more comfortable moving, then move. I agree it was their internalized fatphobia that led to their feelings. Our society sucks when it comes to weight, and I can understand why they might assume it, but just because others have been jerks doesn't mean we should take it out on those who act maturely. Airlines are criminal in how they treat customers.
The lack of water safety concerns in some places in insane. I'm Australian and water safety is drilled into us as kids. I remember when an inspector came to check our pool setup to make sure we had the legal requirements, such as a pool fence that is lockable and not easily climbed over (we had to move a bench for this) and they asked us if we ever swam without an adult present which we did not.
this is considering that its a legal requirement for schools to provide swimming lessons and we had a week every year where we are taught how to swim, how to spot riptides and what to do if caught in one, and all sorts of other water safety stuff.
leaving young kids in a pool to go inside and smoke, is crazy to me. people can drown, babies can drown. don't think your kids are immune. set up a watching spot where you can have your smokes and still keep them in eyesight, its not that hard.
I think it’s not THAT grandma’s smoking, it’s WHAT grandma’s smoking.
Old people complaining on buses/coaches are the reason why I always felt uncomfortable and guilty when I sat in the accessible seats on the bus while extremely fatigued and in pain going to the hospital for radiotherapy treatment. They were always like 'you're young, get up' and I felt like 💩 when I said no. I hate entitled old people.
1:40 haven't finished this section yet, but my parents had the same rule for me and my siblings growing up, if the water was more than 3ft their needed to be an adult. The only time I found it annoying was when I turned 14 my parents offed the responsibility of being the adult who watches the kids on to me, but as an adult now I still think it was the right thing to do.
And all three of us were in swimming lessons for 8 years from when we were 4 so we really knew how to swim but I still think the rule is necessary because kids can be stupid.
For the bus one, it depends on the bus system. There are inner city busses where you hop on and hop off at will, and sit wherever there is room. But some longer bus routes or out of city bus routes sometimes require "booking a seat" and sometimes these systems have a way to choose a seat. Kinda like booking a long train ride where you pick seats, but on a bus.
For the first story, NTA!!! like Shaaba said, it doesn't take long for an accident in a pool to happen, and also, if a kid starts to drown, it is not like it is in the movies and can be very quick and silent, so you need an adult to be alert and keep watch.
11:00 when I was really heavy (300-ish) and had to fly, I would reserve the window seat because there's a little extra room that you can scoot toward and give the middle passenger extra room.
I am sure that watching someone move just a few seats back, when you're fat, you know. But also… The unmitigated gall of that person to wait and ambush this person and confront them for having discreetly change seats is unacceptable behavior.
Just because your need isn’t visible, doesn’t mean it isn’t valid. The bus-poster self-accommodated, in advance, and within the established framework. Not all conditions are visible!
As someone with both visible and invisible disabilities, it’s so annoying to have accommodations connected to my visible disabilities accepted while the ones attached to my invisible conditions rejected/invalidated/ignored.
But I also want to acknowledge that needs that arise as folks age are also valid - but folks need to learn/be taught the proper channels to request accommodations rather than showing up and just demanding them.
Unfortunately, the problem is a lot bigger than greedy airlines. Airlines actually operate on razor-thin profit margins because of rising fuel costs and trying to keep prices at levels people will pay. They need to offer lower prices for worse service rather than the luxury prices they actually need to to make profit with better service because, at least in the US, air travel is the only viable method of long distance travel. What needs to happen is investment in trains, especially since all this air travel is horrible for the environment, but try telling that to the US government. 😒
1st story: my father wasn't allowed to leave the house by himself until he learned to swim. They lived close to the river and my grandfather lost several friends to drowning.
Nta, op is just protecting her kids and expects the same from her family
For the last story, I don't think OP is the asshole, but I understand why the lady felt the way she did. She assumed that OP moved because they were disgusted to be touching a fat person. It's a reasonable assumption to make. As a fat person, I knew before Shaaba even finished reading that story that Reddit was going to be the real asshole and rip into plus-sized people. And the edit confirmed that's what happened. Everywhere we go, we are constantly reminded people find us disgusting and unacceptable. So yeah, I get the lady's embarrassment and I understand why she assumed OP was being an asshole. Though, of course, making assumptions like that is never really helpful, it's difficult to control sometimes, especially with issues that are deeply tied to your feelings.
1: Granny smoking inside is wrong. Not watching kids is wrong. They're the ahole
2: Is vomiting on other patrons somehow More polite? Pfffft The audacity, agreed!
3: Why do people assume the worst? I always give people the benefit of the doubt, that they have a personal issue that has nothing to do with me in such a situation. The world rotates with you, not around you, stop looking for things to be upset about, projecting your own insecurities onto other people, people!
2) NTA. I agree with Shaaba. If that ever happens again, politely say to them, "It was either that or vomiting on your friend for the next 5-6 hours. Cheers!"
I am a young, disabled person and there is a t-shirt that I desperately want because it sums up leaving the house every day for me so well. "I don't look disabled? Well, you don't look like an asshole but here we are." I'm not obliged to look disabled "enough" to take your ableist bullsh!t.
The first post.
I was always that older kid in my teenage years that had to take care of the younger kids in the lake/sea because their parents wanted to drink and sun bathe. It was so stressful. They often didn't listen to me and I had to make up games for them not to follow me into the deeper water. I never got to have any fun because of that. One time a girl had an allergic reaction and had to go to the hospital. I had to search for a sober enough adult to do that for over an hour. Watch your kids. You can't expect a teenager to do it for you. They are lucky I'm depressed and autistic enough for me to care for their children deeply. One of them was literally 3 yo. I still haven't recovered from that.
I get nauseous very easily on the buss as well and definitely feel that pain...
Being "young" doesn't necessarily mean you're perfectly healthy. The old woman doesn't suffer from sitting in the aisle seat. OP does.
The pool kids don't respect either their parents or their grandma because they stayed in the pool unattended AND told on Grandma.
I think if I was plus sized I would feel embarrassed or at least uncomfortable that I was overlapping someone’s space, if there was only one larger passenger and one smaller beside the op then there may have been room for the larger person to overlap the seat and not be on top of op, obviously it’s just speculation but I also think it’s the airline that basically created the problem
Hey people what's up? How's your day been?
Hello
@@Username_Echo Hey! How are you?
@@Finnley-supports-translives I'm good. How are you?
@@Username_Echo I'm good, thanks, and that's good
I had parents who smoked inside when i was a child. I have asthma and would regularly end up in hospital. I now have COPD as a result of the second hand smoke. No parent should smoke inside. Make your own choices for yourself but dont force those choices in your child.
First story: as a swimming teacher, under 13s (even older than 13s) shoule absolutely not be left unattended in a pool, especially if that makes them, a child, in charge of taking care of even younger children.
Kids should always be watched, even if competent in the water, shit happens, or if they need ro help someone else they may be stressed and unable ro help efficiently. Our big rule is NEVER SWIM ALONE, which includes adults. If you go to a beach alone without telling anyone, and something happens, you're stuck.
on the third story, it's a bit tricky. im also fat and fly a lot, especially with lowcost airlines (ryanair, easyjet, wizzair, etc), and bc of how absolutely tiny the seats are i always feel like im squishing the people next to me. if someone asked to be moved away from me i'd probably feel a bit hurt too, but i definitely wouldn't complain to their face about it, i'd also definitely appreciate the extra wiggle room too lol. i don't think op or that woman are the assholes for the situation itself, but it was a bit assholey for the woman to complain to op specifically, bc op wasn't the issue, like you said, airlines are for squishing us in like sardines. i'm also fairly tall (175cm) and i just barely fit in most low cost airline seats, but my knees start to hurt after a while bc of how my knees are touching the seat in front of me.
really sad that op had to add that edit too, fat people are people too and we deserve respect regardless of how much space we take up.
In Australia, if you fail to supervise your kids in a pool and something awful happens, you'll go to jail. On top of potentially losing a kid, you'll go down for manslaughter/negligence. We aren't the only country with a law like this. That's how reasonable that first OP's "one pool rule" is- it's an actual law in some countries.
I agree that airline seats can be on the small side but I do like cheap flights . It would not be the airlines that paid the extra cost it would be us the passengers. Obviously if there are free seats on the plane and a person is uncomfortable for any reason it’s ok to ask to move but I’m not so quick to blame the airlines as I like cheap flights. I don’t particularly want to pay more for extra space .
So I finally started to watch your videos and in so many of these cases you take the words right out of my mouth. It's very satisfying and validating lmao.
First one: totally agree with you, the parents have all right to set safety rules for swimming and those should absolutely be respected by the adults who own the pool.
I used to go swimming A Lot with my friends when we were around 9-12, and a lot of the time we didn't have an adult present (teeny tiny local beach), so maybe I'm not straddling the highest horse in this discussion. But if our parents had told us to bring an adult, we would have 😌
I completely understand what the bus passenger story person feels, I also get motion sickness and always pick the window seat, in addition to that I always sit down on the city bus too if at all possible, because I fall over if the bus starts moving before I’ve sat down and I also “don’t look like I need that seat” either, unfortunately in the winter the bus windows get completely covered in salt and most of the time you can’t see through them at all so I have to rely more heavily on gravol to prevent nausea then.
My cousin is the only one in their household who does smoke. They only smoke in their room. No where else on property, even outside. It’s weird but there it is.
I feel for the plus-sized person, but frankly, your problem with seat sizes is not for your seat neighbor to fix. I pay for a seat, I want to use that seat.
I had a long (18 hours) flight sitting next to a VERY obese man. It was a row of 2 seats. I was too shy to ask for a different seat because I didn't want to embarrass him. I am fairly small, so I figured if he spills over a bit it's uncomfortable but I can deal. Well, over night I tried to sleep but every 10 minutes or so he fell over to my side and I had to push his 500 lbs off me. Most miserable flight of my life.
I think it would be the job of the people at check-in and the flight attendants to recognize such situations and assist if possible. They can do so discreetly. I have definitely been asked before if I would switch seats so a parent and small child can sit together. I have been asked if I would switch so a tall person can have the seat with more leg room (I gained a window seat which was much preferable for me). I have seen flight attendants point out if there was an empty row in the back so people can spread out. So, the flight attendant should have looked for an empty seat and offered a switch.
As a plus size person with long legs that aren’t comfortable with being cramped together I honestly would have been fine for OP wanting to move seats. I would see it as a free space.
Something similar happened to me earlier this year but it was less comfort and more want to be with family. My seat as it turns out didn’t allow two parents and their son from sitting together so the husband and wife asked me if I could swap seats with them. I said yes cause I understand the genuine need for that on a more than 10 hour long flight (it was after stop over from where I lived to Istanbul then to Ireland so I had been flying for around 5 hrs prior and had 1 1/2 hrs time to recoop). So I agreed and welp turns out the wife was using an aisle seat and the other passenger was using the window seat so we both had more space. I see it as a bit of ironic karma that by doing something so basic my flight was made better.
Honestly, as a fat people, I would've been super relieved if OP did that, because I would've tried for an hour to not touch her, and it would be super not comfortable ^^'
I don't really get the other woman, touching other people is super inconvenient for me and I would hate it, so if they move, I'm relieved, especially as I would be too socially akward to think doing it myself. And having the seat next to you empty is great! She improved her situation, and the situation of both of those passengers, and didn't make any fuss about it, it's perfect ^^'
The bus seat one was interesting. I have never heard of reserving a bus seat. We can't do that here, in NY State. When I traveled across the state, or across the country, it was you take any seat that's open. The ones up front are for elderly or those with mobility issues (using a cane,etc.) you can't request a specific seat. I wonder where this person lives. I agree that she did nothing wrong.
I had an ankle condition that made it hard for me to stand/walk for long periods of time and the dirty looks I’d get from old people when I sat was SO ANNOYING!!
We were on a trolley on a tour of NASA and we were in a large group of about 12 family members. We were all seated together, and the tour guide asked us each time we got on and off to return to our original seats to go faster and avoid confusion.
At one point, another family sat down in a portion of our seats, breaking up our group. I did tell the family that they have sat down in our area, but they were unwilling to move. We didn't make a big deal about it, but it was annoying. This meant we had to shift our seats, moving other people out of their seats, etc etc....
Coincidentally, my young son (1YO) got nauseous on the ride and threw up on their feet, which made me feel terrible. However, if they would've been in their seat it wouldn't have happened to them and he would've at least gotten sick on a family member instead.
🤢🤷🏼♀️
Perhaps the grandma in the first one was stepping inside specifically to keep the smoke away from those little lungs? (But.. it does linger - and it's a proven fact that second-hand smoke is even more likely to kill someone than smoking first-hand. So, your point is still completely valid.)
Drowning is quick and silent!
Even strong adult swimmers can drown. Don't mess around with water.
It CAN happen to you or your kid.
Never swim alone.
If someone’s leg is incidentally touching mine, I will do as much as I am able to put even an inch of space between us, because I have a really hard time with non-intentional physical contact, especially for extended periods of time (it genuinely makes me feel nauseous after a little while). This is true even with my friends and family, and doubly so with strangers (it sucks because as the smallest person in my circles, I always end up in the middle seat in cars). If I ever found myself in the position of the op in the last story, I would absolutely need to, at the very least, ask if there was a different seat available, because there’s no way I’d be able to handle a multi-hour flight in which I couldn’t escape in either direction.