Made the Wrong Decision With Our Kids | Failed Season | Learning to Heal

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  • Опубликовано: 28 авг 2024

Комментарии • 72

  • @TDBee09
    @TDBee09 4 месяца назад +46

    Brian and Lexi, y'all are the best parents to Aza! She was fine, at the end of the day there was nothing you could have done to change what was happening. Your mom's were the most qualified second best to be there. You both need to forgive yourselves because you made the best decision in that moment with what you felt was going on. Aza is fine, God is still God and has ultimate control whether you were right beside her or miles away. Love y'all, but y'all gotta breathe, stretch, shake, and let this go! You learned so so much. Thanks for being so vulnerable and sharing! As a mom of a 3 year old girl and pregnant with number 2, I totally get your mom/dad guilt, but we are all human and there is no playbook for what to do. We do the best we can and if we can't physically be there our support systems step up and that's why we left them in place because we knew it was the best next option if we couldn't be there. Emergencies happen whether we are around or not, they aren't planned for, you guys did what you thought was best in that moment.

    • @josettebyrd7459
      @josettebyrd7459 4 месяца назад +1

      I totally agree with you guys It wouldn't mattered if you were there are not it wasn't nothing you could have done. I can understand Lexie too because it's her child and just being there was her job to do and she felt guilty because she wasn't. Then the people in the comments wasn't making it any better the way they were coming at her for not going back home. She also felt even worse because she felt by staying cause Brian wanted her to and she didn't feel like she was needed made it even worse on her. You're not a bad mother we've all made bad decisions when it comes to doing or know what's best for our kids being a first time parent. You learn with as you go.

    • @livinglifemyway6511
      @livinglifemyway6511 4 месяца назад +2

      It takes a village to raise a child. You all have a wonderful village. Your parents understood the importance of showing up for each other.

    • @christinacarter1318
      @christinacarter1318 4 месяца назад +1

      I just watched this video. Thank you for being so transparent. I’ve been a mom for almost 12 years now, but I’ve never been married. One thing that God reminds me is that my children (his children) are his babies. I’m the earthly parent, but no one can protect Aza like the Lord can. I pray that you have forgiven yourself and give yourself grace, the way Jesus gave us. You gave your daughter comfort with your strong support, and you supported your husband. Remember, when the kids get older and go live their best lives, it’s just the two of you together FOREVERRR. That’s the goal! ❤️🙏🏾☺️

  • @SD-ci6kz
    @SD-ci6kz 4 месяца назад +5

    I have never in my life encountered these people in social media anywhere and yet I can feel their teamship. Idk if that’s a word but forget the love. This is a team. A tree could fall out of the sky on one their legs and they would come together and come up with a plan immediately. This means no matter how dark things get they are gonna bear fruit no matter the direction they decide on.

  • @JamBajan
    @JamBajan 4 месяца назад +11

    Testimonies are messy and hard. We love to focus on the happy ending but this podcast right here??? We are witnessing a JOURNEY!! Thank you so much for your transparency. At my big age of 54, I am learning something today. I pray for God's continued blessings over your beautiful family.

  • @cindylewis2624
    @cindylewis2624 4 месяца назад +19

    Love the podcast…there is no such thing as a perfect parent! You’re living, learning & growing! 🙏🏽🫶🏽

  • @aleciaaustin3018
    @aleciaaustin3018 4 месяца назад +6

    Hey Lexie/ Brian,
    One please forgive yourselves, then forgive each other!! I am a mom, this will not be the only time that you will feel like you have made the wrong decisions, hindsight is 20/20, give yourself grace, I love that you can talk to each other and be open, I will keep praying for both of you. Don't hold on to the guilt. Love you both

  • @robertreeves5666
    @robertreeves5666 4 месяца назад +8

    Your podcast is excellent, I will be 68yrs old this Thursday…. I learned a lot from you two, Great parents, beautiful kids ❤❤❤ May God keep blessing you 🙏🏽🙏🏽

  • @sharonthomas9851
    @sharonthomas9851 4 месяца назад +6

    God Bless you both for discussing the hard season. It is so awesome to see you as a young couple acknowledge God in your marriage and pressing through. I am a 63 year old woman and I have been married for 46 years and I really enjoy your channel.

  • @TumikaPatrice
    @TumikaPatrice 4 месяца назад +10

    I’ve followed your channel for a while, but have never chimed in. I appreciate your transparency and authenticity. Never get any weird vibes off of you. We don’t get a manual that tells us what to do in every situation. We live, we learn, we grow. Mom guilt is a very real thing. Even when we are doing our best, sometimes we don’t always get it right. And know that I’m not saying you staying with Brian was wrong. But you feel it was wrong and I am addressing that. I’m a solo parent who had to decide between making my shift at work and staying with my daughter who needed to be admitted in the hospital. Such a hard decision. I battled with what to do, knowing if I missed the shift I wouldn’t have enough money to make the rent payment because my check would be short. My parents stayed with her and I went to work. The guilt was tremendous. Mom guilt is a very real thing. It can be a real challenge to silence the voices of guilt (internally and externally) and give yourself grace to not be perfect. Sometimes there will be times when no matter what the answer just isn’t perfect. We do the best we can. It is very obvious that both you and Brian work hard to be intentional in the love and care you give to each other and to the children. Keep on being blessed. Forgive yourself and don’t let it paralyze you. You’re both doing a great job. Thank you for being you and thank you for sharing pieces of your life with us. Sending you a cyber hug from one momma to another. 💙

  • @anniebritton9349
    @anniebritton9349 4 месяца назад +8

    I love Gods Word so much and I am reminded what he said in his word that ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER FOR GOOD TO THEM THAT LOVE GOD TO THEM THAT ARE THE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE. You guys call it a failure, I look at it as a time of growth, experience and maturity. God use this to stretched both of you and you grew in capacity of who you are and who he has called you both to be. As crazy as it probably was for you look at where you are NOW. He allows us to go through..... to come out on the other side with more strength and power and more of his Anointing. Remember God is always at work in us and through us. You guys are AWESOME!!! My husband and I have been married for 42 Years and I can look back and see that there are times we both had to work through and process a season a difficult season. There will be many challenges and trials that will come; but know you will come out on the other side. We are all tried in the fire; but will you come through as pure gold. Trust God and hold on to him in the most difficult of times!! I Love you guys so much! You are a beautiful couple!

  • @ri1664
    @ri1664 4 месяца назад +3

    I really enjoyed this episode. I can completely relate to having a moment of feeling like a bad parent. I am a single mom and I have the mom guilt sometimes cause I have to work and that little face is crying and being in the hospital with my youngest and beating myself up of something I didn’t know that could’ve ended badly had I not caught it. I am like you grateful for my village what supports and prays for me . I am glad you shared your story because it shows that even in a marriage a partnership there can be hard seasons and you can feel like you have failed. Your story is for your strength and growth and for our inspiration. I enjoy y’all videos and I am glad that you guys show both sides, the ups and the downs.

  • @blessedblessed4323
    @blessedblessed4323 4 месяца назад +9

    It’s life. No one can do everything
    Lessons learned, growth. Be blessed

    • @blessedblessed4323
      @blessedblessed4323 4 месяца назад +1

      Let’s go through it once. Great advice.

    • @blessedblessed4323
      @blessedblessed4323 4 месяца назад +1

      You guys are great. Your husband would have been ok. I do understand your wife’s position regarding your daughter. The decision certainly was hard
      But we live and learn. I see your husbands compassion
      I know he would never put you in that position again. You both love your family😇😇😇😇

  • @hopegrace7699
    @hopegrace7699 4 месяца назад +5

    Forget the past, you can't go back and change it. We do the best we can in this life. God know's our heart.

  • @funmio4892
    @funmio4892 4 месяца назад +2

    So glad i found yoy guys. The couple i never knew i needed. This is not called Get deep podcast for no reason.

  • @nichelles1033
    @nichelles1033 4 месяца назад +1

    Hi to both of you 🤗 I just wanted to share something with you guys. So Lexi, as a mom, wife, & woman of God, I can assure you of two things, you guys did not fail that season & YOU BOTH did the right thing for your daughter & marriage during that season of your life. I understand that “culture” will try to tell you that you should have left your husband & been with your daughter. Or that since you guys didn’t learn & figure things out sooner during that time to make things right in your marriage, you guys failed but what does the word of God say? Y’all are one & nothing should be allowed to divide that. Your husband did NEED you, maybe not in the way you may think but trust me, he did. For the rest of his life he will remember you being there for YALL TO DO THAT. When we are obedient and follow the will of God, he will take care of all the necessary provisions. I believe that is why he allowed you guys to be gone & there before finding out about your daughter & had a great team (your moms) in place with her & for her. The reason each season after your tough one is good, is because you passed. God is rewards, renewing, restoring, & prospering your next season. You only fail when you give up & don’t grow. Also Lexi, it’s ok if things don’t look the way we thought they would or wanted them to. It’s all about obtaining the goal in the end, don’t be so hard on yourself. Love you guys 🥰

  • @vanessabaker6747
    @vanessabaker6747 4 месяца назад +2

    Good Afternoon 🌄 The Cole's Family and Chat
    Love ❤ you guys as always!!!!

  • @donnamoore8441
    @donnamoore8441 4 месяца назад +3

    I thank God so much for your Testimony and Honesty about the Institution of Marriage. You have been chosen to be an example and witness to those that are married. You both just taught that Marriage is not for the weak at heart….but if you walk, run, cry or be overwhelmed in your Season and lean on God that this too shall pass. Would you guys consider hugging and giving each or the a kiss to close your podcast…as it will show again “What God has bought together nothing can put it asunder…if you but lean on HIM❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @ednanelson1897
    @ednanelson1897 4 месяца назад

    You guys are truly a blessing to all parents. You are so vulnerable and open about your inner struggles. Every parent goes through emergencies without warning. Let go of the guilt 😔. Remember the lessons learned from the experience and move on. Gid gives us lessons to learn but He also gives us grace. Give yourselves some. Live you guys and love the podcast. ❤

  • @brownetime08
    @brownetime08 4 месяца назад +1

    That's the reality of mature relationships, when they get out of sync it's not always due to wrongdoing. 💯 So, how do you move forward when no one is to blame but feelings are still hurt. ‼ THIS is real talk.

  • @JulietMitchell.
    @JulietMitchell. 4 месяца назад

    Loved your podcast, you guys are doing extremely great. More grease to your elbow

  • @wayedenekidd-slydell8272
    @wayedenekidd-slydell8272 4 месяца назад

    This is so theraputic. I am proud of you both for taking the time to be so vulnerable with your viewers. Thank you. God has great plans for you and your family. Hold on tight to his promises and the love you have for each other ❤❤❤🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

  • @josettebyrd7459
    @josettebyrd7459 4 месяца назад +1

    Love this family so much true. I love their open honesty. That's when you know your wife has faith in you. Its a test to either make or break your relationship with each other and God. yourselves as well. Thanks for sharing all of the good times as well as the bad that we do know about or see unless you both share it with your community. Being honesty about failure. God bless you both .May he continue to bless you and your family on your next journey together. 🙏🤲🙌💅.Yes indeed.

  • @inacook2285
    @inacook2285 4 месяца назад

    Strong, brave, and radically honest...You will continue to terrify the outside world... and grow in the light.

  • @elizabethmutasa1008
    @elizabethmutasa1008 4 месяца назад

    This an awesome honest, indepth and mature reflection and discussion of their relationship.....this is very inspiring to many of us....thank you for sharing your highs and lows of your marital journey....❤

  • @angeladz
    @angeladz 4 месяца назад

    You guys have and are building such a great foundation in marriage and also in parenting. I looove ya'lls honesty and willingness to go there not just with us but with each other.
    I can only imagine it would be difficult to have to choose between your spouse and your child. And I think either one you choose, you're gonna wonder whether the other was a better option. I think it's good that you dealt with how you really felt and learned from it.

  • @essiezawadi5158
    @essiezawadi5158 4 месяца назад

    Wow, I love how raw and honest y'all are 🤎

  • @kaydeen5739
    @kaydeen5739 4 месяца назад +2

    I admire your honesty😢 ❤

  • @cherrybaptiste626
    @cherrybaptiste626 4 месяца назад

    That experience brought exponential growth! It takes some people years to achieve that growth! That’s love! The question is who comes first your husband / wife or your children?

  • @lindseyheidecker336
    @lindseyheidecker336 4 месяца назад

    Thank you for sharing such a hard event. Lexxi I hear you and I would’ve done the same thing as you and felt the same thing afterward. Thank you for sharing!

  • @gloriajohnson1122
    @gloriajohnson1122 4 месяца назад

    I Love both of you so much! ❤Hard, hard, place!

  • @lynetteprice360
    @lynetteprice360 4 месяца назад +3

    Eldest daughter only one daughter should say eldest child

  • @buetifulkay12
    @buetifulkay12 4 месяца назад

    You guys are so wholesome…glad you started a podcast🎉

  • @andreastokes2095
    @andreastokes2095 4 месяца назад

    You guys are so professional and deep.
    When I watch you it's like a moment out of essence magazine. I seldom listen to a podcast. However you two are very engaging and open. Thanks for sharing.

  • @sandrad.8205
    @sandrad.8205 4 месяца назад

    Love your podcast, wishing you many blessings 🙏🏽

  • @destinyidentitywithdrannac6114
    @destinyidentitywithdrannac6114 4 месяца назад

    A lot of times we as believers must learn how to JUST BE HAPPY WITH GOD, even when we think we need otherr people to fulfill the voids we might feel, and through that He will restore us to the place weEACH Need to be with Him, so that we can also continue to live in the unity of his Spirit with others.

  • @elainew9965
    @elainew9965 4 месяца назад

    Wow! Wish all couples could view this video. Beautifully said, in every way.❤

  • @ashleychildress9892
    @ashleychildress9892 4 месяца назад

    Omg this...😢❤ you guys are AMAZING parents!

  • @LB-ec4uf
    @LB-ec4uf 4 месяца назад +1

    Love this family!❤

  • @shirleyhardnett6067
    @shirleyhardnett6067 4 месяца назад +1

    Beautiful lovely couple. I love watching your video

  • @hishandmaiden718
    @hishandmaiden718 4 месяца назад +2

    I know that it was difficult to stay in Texas, but what would have been different in the outcome if you had left to be with your daughter? I don't think anything would have changed. Aza would still have spent 4 days in the hospital and you would still have been just as worried whether you were by her side or not. I think mom guilt is real, and regardless of the decision you make, we tend to think we could have done better, or done more. Extend grace to yourself, and trust that your steps, whether you recognize them in the moment or not, "are ordered."

  • @creejackson1575
    @creejackson1575 4 месяца назад

    I love that you guys talk it out, good or bad. It works❤

  • @hodanbille
    @hodanbille 4 месяца назад +1

    Bold to show this hardcore sight of marriage. This is how love goes…

  • @dkelly8971
    @dkelly8971 4 месяца назад

    Lexi! That is not a good friend, the girl who told you, "girl i would have left him..." That is a challenging situation. What does GOD say? His word says to submit to your husband in all things. I had a similar situation but I learned through it, God is faithful as we are faithful to obey His word even when we don't always understand. You guys are on a beautiful journey. I encourage you to seek God's word for clarity and TRUST that His word will NEVER fail you and your marriage. And also may you be blessed with friends who will encourage you Biblically....
    Blessings to you and your marriage. ❤

  • @shariselleschoop8460
    @shariselleschoop8460 4 месяца назад +2

    We can all Tell you that you guys are great, but you have to deal with that guilt. I love how you guys handle❤

  • @hyottey1980
    @hyottey1980 4 месяца назад

    Each journey is needed to strengthen our faith in God and spiritual growth to unite us as a family.

  • @Shallewa
    @Shallewa 4 месяца назад +1

    WOW!!😪👏

  • @klewsharingmypointofview9834
    @klewsharingmypointofview9834 4 месяца назад

    Sis don’t beat yourself up & do not let social media come between u & Brian. Anything could of happened either way . Life is funny maybe it would of been Brian who was sick before his race. You are the best mom by just putting your child with the right care of her grandparents. All parents cannot be somewhere where their child is 24/7. One day out of many days. Loving her everyday is enough.❤ she will probably say the same when she is older. My mom had to go away for work for 3 years when I was 4 and my dad took care of me & my siblings . She felt guilt but as a child we will know in our hearts that u care as u did prior. As we get older we will understand. ❤and forgive yourselves

  • @matydiop792
    @matydiop792 4 месяца назад +2

    Love you 🎉🎉❤❤

  • @lebomonethi5782
    @lebomonethi5782 4 месяца назад

    Absolutely forgive yourself sis...You are a great mom and wife

  • @Babiblu1211
    @Babiblu1211 4 месяца назад

    Thanks for sharing…you guys are young and new parents. Don’t listen to any of the naysayers. I know the guilt may be weighing heavy on you now about the decision with your daughter however, don’t sweat the small stuff you don’t want to be 45 or 50 years old single because you fed so heavily over small decisions like that. I’m pretty certain most of those people making the comments about leaving your husband are single women you don’t want to be them!!!

  • @doriemunoz-qe1st
    @doriemunoz-qe1st 4 месяца назад

    Brian and Lexi nice and sweet couple,nice you both share your up and down in social media ,interesting ,it’s a eye opener to other couples who are struggling at this moment, 👏👍❤️❤️🙏

  • @christinelucus3485
    @christinelucus3485 4 месяца назад

    It is SO hard to juggle being a wife and a mother, not to mention a job on top of it. ❤

  • @nahomieriche4827
    @nahomieriche4827 4 месяца назад +1

    Really enjoyed this, I believe that even though our hearts could be in the right place about something but it doesn't mean we make the right decisions according to The Lord. The Wonderful things is we have much grace with The Lord and by that grace we can grow from our mistakes and be better. Mistakes are going to happen we can't avoid it all but we can make choices to choose to learn from them to become our best selves in The Lord which is what He says that is❤

  • @joellet8774
    @joellet8774 4 месяца назад +1

    Why isn’t the dad asking himself the question of going back and stopping everything to be with his daughter?

  • @DebbieRay64
    @DebbieRay64 4 месяца назад

    Why y'all got me at work crying. Motherhood is never easy. No matter what decision we make, people are always going to have an opinion.

  • @denisedean2446
    @denisedean2446 3 месяца назад

    There are no perfect parents. You are a great mom.However, I would have raced home to my baby.We live and learn...

  • @lynetteprice360
    @lynetteprice360 4 месяца назад

    What is your definition of season

  • @hyottey1980
    @hyottey1980 4 месяца назад

    Once you display your emotion on social media 1. It helps many others. 2. Some people are quite negative. I see the glass half filled and others see it as half empty. Trust God in every decision not people.

  • @IvyElizabeth918
    @IvyElizabeth918 4 месяца назад

    I feel like the race should have been forgotten about and you both go back to be with your daughter… but I understand that you were both weighing the options. I just know that even with my support system (which I have a great family who will always step in) they’re not me and my daughter would want me.

  • @unapologeticallyromel7096
    @unapologeticallyromel7096 4 месяца назад

    Enjoy the video

  • @sandrad.8205
    @sandrad.8205 4 месяца назад

    I am a 50 year old biracial woman and I love black men but they disappoint every time, I see how white men, Italian men treat women so I am switching over.

  • @BrendaTease-zg8tr
    @BrendaTease-zg8tr 4 месяца назад

    ❤❤❤

  • @ShneiceB
    @ShneiceB 4 месяца назад

    ❤ the podcast/you guys youtube, ya'll keep saying kids while Brian was training....wasn't it just Aza and you guys were pregnant?...

    • @TheColeLife
      @TheColeLife  4 месяца назад +4

      You’re correct! We kept misspeaking because now we’re so used to saying kids 😂😂 good catch!

  • @h.peters
    @h.peters 4 месяца назад

    Your eldest daughter, you got more than one? Is that a premonition of another daughter on the way.

    • @TheColeLife
      @TheColeLife  4 месяца назад +4

      😂😂😂 nope! Just meant to say eldest child but randomly came out “eldest daughter” 😂

  • @MommyFab77
    @MommyFab77 4 месяца назад

    ❤❤❤