OP seems to think if she admitted to all the other stuff she would admit to that too. I disagree. If she admits to selling it she has to give OP the money.
I agree. Why? Her son is 16, the other was 18 and needed the car for mobility. The only difference in treating the boys the husband was doing was being age specific.
@@lyndatuttle No, he got his son the car because of his disability which in my opinion makes no sense as a lot of people who have disabilities can't drive. Just because OP's son doesn't have a disability doesn't mean he shouldn't be able to drive. And I am guessing this is the states so the 16 yr old is at the age where he can drive. But I do agree with everyone else, OP is TA because she made her son believe that his stepdad would get him a car. She shouldn't have because it was not up to the stepdad. I think OP and her ex, if he is still in the picture, should buy their son a car themselves.
@@SNixon14 I think it's because his disability makes it harder for him to walk and use public transport. My mom is similar. She can't walk well or for long, but she's fine driving. And he's 18 so he'll presumably start being more independent and getting out of the house more.
Either that, or she's buying other things from the items she steals. I knew somebody that I stopped being friends with who would steal things and she'd either keep them for herself or she'd steal them to sell. She took something of mine and sold it to somebody at school and bought make up out of the money. My mother had to get the police involved.
In the story of the kleptomaniac sister who repeatedly “steals all the nice gifts Cal gets” the OP - have Cal leave one of HIS things with OP and when sister steals it, bring her up on charges! Since her mother encourages and supports her younger daughter in her stealing and lying (what a terrible parent!) and OP’s dad apparently has no spine to discipline his own daughter or punish her for stealing… maybe the police can? Do parents not realize that raising children to not be lying, thieving little sociopaths is part of their job?
She had already stole one of Cal´s stuff (and there´s the evidence). I would cut the father some slack though, it seemed like he already tried to discipline his daughter, but her mom overruled him.
I don't think the dad doesn't have a spine. He seems to be the type to punish sister, but the twat of a wife he married sabotages that and makes the dad's punishments invalid.
Maybe OP needs to take her Mothers things, hide them in sisters room and when Mother asks about them, just look at sister pointedly and leave. Maybe when Mother feels how OP feels she'll address the issue. 😂😂😂 Also, maybe OP can go to train station and ask if anyone turned in her IPad. Not likely but you never know, there are trustworthy people out there.
Is that in the parents handbook given when you get your first child? "Do not raise child to be lying thieving sociopaths." /sarcasm You would think it would be obvious. Apparently not to the mother in the story. I think the mother was abetting her thieving golden child. Neither the golden child nor the mother are blameless.
@@thecoolgrandma7208 considering the sister doesn't take from her mother seems to me like she has some control over it, otherwise she would already, or maybe she does, but the mother just brushes it off like, "I gave it to her". I wonder, if she's that much of a tea leaf is she stealing from shops also? She definitely needs constant supervision.
2nd story...Why on Earth would you expect your 16 year old son to get a car from your husband, because husband bought one for his son's 18th Birthday as he's going to college? And why would you tell the kid to expect that?! A new console is a great gift, their like $500.
Of course! An 18-year-old with disabilities and going to college is EXACTLY like a healthy 16-year-old still in high school, right? The major AH was the mother, getting her son all excited over getting a car she had absolutely no reason to expect her husband had gotten her son.
Forget about the disability. Older son is 18 and hes going to college. Younger son is 16, Yes he should get a car. When hes 18. Did older son get a car at 16. NO. If older son did get a car at 16 does that mean younger son should have gotten one at 14 to be fair. YTA
I hate these posts where a 16 year old is referred to as a “child” when they do unacceptable things and then as an “almost adult” otherwise. One or the other people. OP in the first story has had to put up with rude, ignorant behavior from his stepdaughter for 2 (and probably more) years. Where does OP get to draw the line, when it seems pretty obvious he’s getting no support from his wife?
Right? Guess the people of Reddit failed to read the part where the stepdaughter was the one being antagonistic. At 16, she’s more than old enough to know what she’s doing is wrong. She needs a therapist.
@@AuskaDezjArdamaath She needs her parents to get together, sit her down - maybe even with a therapist - and calmly but firmly explain to her that the divorce is final, that they aren't getting back together ever again. Getting rid of OP will not change anything and treating him that way will have consequences. She doesn't have to like him, but she doesn't get to disrespect him when she's at that house. She's entitled to be mad and upset about the divorce, but that doesn't mean she gets to behave like that and get away with it. She's 16, old enough to know better.
Thank you. The amount of people on Reddit who treat these 16-18 year olds like they’re 5 year olds and completely write off all of their horrible behavior are ridiculous. Then OP sets an extremely reasonable boundary, and the people on Reddit just sit there on their moral high horse, ready to absolutely bash OP because “she’s just a kid!!!”. It’s ridiculous. She’s living at OP’s house and she already doesn’t respect him, but now she’s starting to press buttons, break boundaries and see how far she can take things. She knows exactly what she’s doing, and so does OP. It is beyond ridiculous to say that OP is the a-hole here solely because he punished a disrespectful brat (in his own home). I mean it’s quite obvious her mom and dad aren’t actually parenting her. The bare minimum when you live in someone’s house is to pretend like you’re polite strangers. You don’t have to be close, don’t have to spend time together, but you do need to treat that person with even the most basic of respect. And the 16 year old can’t even meet that extremely low bar. OP is NTA, and suggesting that he should just sit there and take it and not punish her and let her continue to constantly disrespect him in his own home, is ridiculous.
Yep, I hate this, my parents divorced when I was much younger than 16. I never acted as a brat towards their new partners, never close because I didn't need or want a stepmother or stepfather because I already had a mother and father and didn't need a stranger filling that role but also never disrespect and been rude to them. It also helped that they respect my boundaries and didn't overstepped their roles as my parents partners and nothing more. Teenagers are mentally retarded they can understand complex social dynamics, social hierarchy and proper social behavior. They chose not to if they were thought through life that they can get away with shit behavior. Which clearly given the mother and grandparents behavior, enabling her (like erasing a crime does erase the need for a sentence, the police capture a thief and give me back the stolen items doesn't means he can walk away free), she didn't learn. The step-dad is teaching this girl a really valuable lesson.
Story 1 - If she wants to keep pictures in her bedroom, which is her space, that is fine. But putting them in common areas in the house that are shared seems to be what the crossed line for the OP was. Maybe say she can keep the pictures in her room, see if that would be a compromise for the situation.
First story- I was in a similar situation and my answer was to outdo my stepchild by getting large poster style copies of the offending photos. And I placed them in prominent positions throughout the house. The stepdaughter was baffled by my behavior and I just said that a photo was nothing but a piece of paper with ink on it. And as long as it wasn’t an inappropriate photo it would be welcome to cover the flaws in the plaster. She gave up trying to upset me. And I laughed for weeks at her disappointment in my response. She asked me if she could take them down within a couple of months.
Those YTA comments are just freaking projecting thinking about all the stepparents are bad guys, and seriously need therapy. If they are not blind enough not to miss the mistreatment that was happening. Are they gonna say the same shit when it comes to domestic abuse? At this rate it would not surprise me
@@Symphonia30 Nah, I think it's an ESH situation. And I use that rating rarely. But it seems that this marriage is new and the stepdaughter is probably trying to come to terms with the fact that her bio parents weren't together anymore, and then you have OP who's trying to come to terms with having a stepdaughter who still sees him as an invader. They both need therapy, tbh.
@@Callimo no, just her, kid or not that does not make it okay. Otherwise if she hates it there that much then she can go live with her father. She does get a pass for being a disrespectful idiot when Op has been nothing but civil towards her. But did she return that respect back, no? Respect is a two way street. She’s the one who needs therapy.
@@Symphonia30 I dunno, Op may be respectable off reddit, but the post comes off as this dislike is mutual. Teens still process shit differently than adults, and sometimes divorces hit some of them really hard because they really thought their parents were going to be together forever. OP can talk with someone who can explain why the teen feels the way she does and the teen can talk with a therapist to process her feelings of loss and how to channel those things in more constructive ways. There aren't any bad guys, just a whole bunch of hurt people trying to process life.
@@Callimo would you ever tolerate a disrespectful teenager and they even let them call you a mother F in your own home? She is 16 not 5 years old, at that age, she knows what she is doing. I hope there’s an update on the story
Kid is so upset that he (only) got an EIGHT HUNDRED dollar game that he went to cry in his room at his own bd party. ?!?! I got a $24 socket set at 16, which I used at work for several years.
I only threw a hissy fit over presents once in my life. It was when I was around 5 and everyone bought me clothes instead of toys. My parents gave me the 'be grateful for what you have because other kids don't have' speech, and I never threw a tantrum about presents again. Was I disappointed some years? Yes, but I kept it to myself. I'm 34 now, and I've never had a bad birthday since. Why? Because I'm grateful for what I get. In fact, I love getting clothes that fit for birthdays and Christmas, because good clothes aren't cheap.
My mother got it in her head that she would not give me any gifts which would be silly or fun for years. For years, I got socks. Gold toe over the ankle white socks. As a child, it was a bummer, but I enjoyed them as an adult.
I don't get why OP's mom doesn't think the youngest is a thief then sister literally takes items from others and loses them. Also the fact that when that happens, that the owner of the item doesn't deserve to be told or have the item replaced. Really feel like sister is a klepto. Thank goodness OP's dad is on OP's side. He needs to get sister into therapy
I thought kleptomania was a form of impulse control. As in oooh that’s pretty (pocket). Not figuring out the code to a safe and taking off the case. That takes forethought.
Agreed, I'm glad OP's dad had her back but it does show her sister needs some heavy duty therapy if the stealing really is coming from manic episodes rather than Spoiled Princess Syndrome. On top of adding some consequences to put it into her head that stealing is wrong, OP's mom needs to have an ultimatum put down to either stop enabling this behavior or a divorce may be in her future.
@@karenbanda1100 that's my understanding. My sister is klepto. She has been since before I can remember. Would even break the walls to hide her stolen goods behind posters and stuff. My mum has enabled her, like the mother in the story. She doesn't want for anything. Has plenty of money but still steals things. She stopped seeing her therapist because my mum convinced her that the therapist was wrong about her kleptomania. 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
I don’t buy for one minute the iPad was lost. I’m pretty sure sticky fingers has it in her room. I only hope for OPs sake she backed it up to the cloud so she can restore all her data. Then hopefully she can remotely wipe it in case there is sensitive data on the iPad.
Love the content. One suggestion: maybe set the text font to have a black outline around the white letters. That way, you can still read it when the text scrolls over a white or light background. :)
Story with the OP that told son he'd get a car is totally the AH. I mean, why isn't OP talking to husband about what gift you'd BOTH be giving son? This shouldn't be a shock on the day. OMG heaven forbid you actually talk to your husband about his stepson's birthday!
Klepto sister: I really hope that the dad gets a divorce. I know that I would divorce my wife asap if she would keep enabling my Klepto daughter instead of protecting the other kids. How would I, as the dad, be able to raise my child right and correct behavior like that if my own wife keeps undermining my efforts because she favors one child above the other two? If I have to separate the other two children from the klepto child to protect them, then I would do it in a heartbeat. The mom is so out of touch with reality, it's upsetting to read.
Kleptomania is an actual condition, but what's described in this story seems more targeted than impulse stealing. Why wasn't OP able to get a deadbolt installed on her bedroom door? Why isn't her sister getting help for her condition? Why are OP's belongings being destroyed as well as stolen? Why did the mom know the sister had the tablet on the train, and didn't take it back from her to safeguard it so it wouldn't be left behind? Is mom's stuff getting stolen and damaged too?
The klepto story, wow, there is obviously something wrong with the sister. I've heard of people stealing but stealing from everyone? That's crazy. And their mother enables it. I suppose she is the golden child in the mother's eyes. Well, if OP's parents don't do something about this like punishing her than she will get worse as she gets older.
Story 3: If the safe she had is a keypad one, I would check the area around it, because chances are the sister put a camera up to catch her inputting the code. That or she coated the keys with a substance that leaves finger prints, which appears in UV light. Believe me it happens.
If this sister can’t help herself stealing she is on for a world or hurt. The outside world will not forgive a thief. This child is heading straight for jail and this mom is setting her children up for failure.
If that´s what happened, then sister´s excuse of "can´t help her stealing impulse" is a total lie, because it means she totally planned it, not a "I saw it lying around and got a sudden impulse to take it" case.
@@BY-bj6ic Seriously, commercially available safes are there to stop mostly honest people from snooping and the like, not a dedicated thief from getting into it. LPL gets into those safes with part of an orange juice bottle!
I would have clocked the sister that stole things. She needs to pay off every cent for it and see if she could either locate the iPad or see if there’s a way to have her pay for the pictures to be recovered.
Story 1: NTA. Oh the photos are gone so SUDDENLY the outright disrespect she has been constantly showing you no long exist. I’d be more on her side if it was just photos in her room but she is constantly trying to antagonize you. She needs adult punishments.
If a stepkid was that disrespectful to my mom she would not hesitate to kick her out. Stepdaughter does not get a free pass just for being an idiot and being a kid. The hell are these YTA smoking? I guess they are probably projecting their own insecurities again thinking all stepparents are bad guys. Judging from these comments they’re clearly not reading properly
@@Symphonia30 At 16 she can drive, hold a job, and decide what parent she wanted to live with if custody were revisited. I mean she isn't an adult, but she isn't a kid. At 16 she knows exactly what she doing.
I'm not sure what the ages are but if she's not above a certain age then she has to be there because of split custody. That's the only reason I say ESH. TBH, I probably wouldn't respect my mom and stepdad either if they had an affair. And the guy does sound like he didn't care about the kid to begin with. She is being a little annoying, but the most she did was put family photos in a few places. She's not actually damaging anything she just hurt his feelings because he knows that she's not really wrong about them.
@@untitled-gv3qp if your parent forces you to cohabitate with strangers you don't respect or want around you I say do whatever you want to both of em. There no age requirement for making people respect your boundaries. That mom is trash.
@@untitled-gv3qp ugh, that's not at all all she did. She constantly calls him names and disrespects him in a house that he pays for, eats food he pays for, etc... This is on the mom though. She should've cut this out from the beginning.
@@untitled-gv3qp It's not HER house, it's OP's house. So SD doesn't get to spread photo's of her 'happy family' around the house against OP's wishes. She doesn't get to disrespect Op in his own house and get away with it every time. Her parents got divorced and she's upset about it. She's entitled to those feelings, but that doesn't mean SD should be allowed to treat OP that way again and again without any consequences. She's trying to drive OP away on purpose because she thinks and is hoping that once OP is removed from the picture, her mom and dad can and will get back together again. Her mom needs to put a stop to that behaviour. Right now. SD is 16, not 6. She's old enough to know better
In the first story, it would be different if those pictures were in her room, but she's just being spiteful. If she hates it at her stepdad's house so bad, she should go elsewhere. I would never accept that in a house I pay bills for.
I wouldn't want photos of her mother all over my house if I was her step mother, but having them in her room would be fine. And I definitely wouldn't put up with the verbal disrespect.
@@dulcilass Exactly. I'm a step-parent, and I've been a stepchild, so I understand both sides of the coin. To your point, it's about respect - the stepfather in this situation isn't saying that they don't want to acknowledge the life his wife had before him, but if he's taking care of her, she needs to be respectful.
Story 1, whats with reddit always siding with the vengeful step child whos step parent did nothing wrong to them. Op is NTA, and honestly id divorce and see who the brat will blame next
Reddit is a weird place with weird people. Teens are treated like they don't know right from wrong and adult men can't have feelings. Also double standards....lots of double standards.
These Redditor commenters are just projecting bias idiots. And judging from the responses it’s clear that they don’t read or just ignore the important details
Story 2: YTA. Sorry but you know the saying. “When you assume you make an As out of su and me”. The circumstances are different and ultimately this was never promised so yes, your in the wrong.
The first story reminded me of my teen years. My mothers second husband (referred to as AH) banned all photos in the house, apparently they just collected dust and he wouldn't have it. But he had photos of his daughters in their bedroom.Years later I realised it was because he was threatened by the photos of my father around the house. The kicker... my parents marriage only ended because my father died. So this jerk was threatened by a dead man - but was happy to wear his clothes, carry his briefcase to work every day and sleep in his bed.
1st Story, NTA. OP asked for one thing and this brat is acting like removing those photos like getting rid of jewelry or something then has the audacity to be disrespectful. Single parents love to complain about why no one wants them but can't seem to grasp that not only them but their child(ren) determine how far the relationship goes. I wouldn't be surprised if OP's wife finds her single for a 2nd time.
Definitely the AH. Him and his wife are cheaters and the mom is now forcing her kid to cohabitate with people who don't respect her or her father. Her retaliatory disrespect is both earned and to be expected. I wish the daughter the best of luck. A good parent wouldn't be scum or bring scum around their kids.
My parents were divorced when I was nine and if I’d have acted like that to someone either of them were just dating I’d have gotten my butt whooped! At any age and my parents weren’t big on spanking but disrespectfulness was right up there for reasons they would! And the mom and other family members sticking their noses in it aren’t helping! Personally, I was thrilled when my parents split up! No more arguments/fights that my mom started and all witnessed by me and my younger siblings! My mom was a cheater and dad still would’ve busted my behind for treating the other guy with disrespect!
@@VRDejaVu I mean... There's pretty strong implications with the daughter's word choice of "you tore this family apart" and OP not denying that. Without confirmation, thats a bit damning and puts the daughter's anger and actions in a different context - along with calling into question the truthfulness of OP's description of the situation.
@@VRDejaVu I don't call into question the words of the daughter because this is not a post she's made of the situation from her prospective. Its a post made by someone else, so what OP has stated the daughter has said would need to be taken more at face value, and as anything we hear from him is painted with an obvious bias towards himself. This is not to say him having bias is necessarily *wrong* in of itself - everyone has some level of bias in any situation because though they (might) have a good grasp on their *own* thoughts, actions, justifications, etc., they rarely have the same of others. So, no, not a double standard.
If I got a game console from my parents I would be ecstatic. If I was told I was getting a car and a console showed up I'd be hopping mad. I'm 42. Don't blame the kid for his reaction.
if you are going to use the white print for the subtitles, please make sure they are on a dark background. i couldn't read most of the stories this time. i am very hard of hearing, and there are many totally deaf folks out here, and we rely on the subtitles. thank you.
Story 2: so Jack’s actual son, who is disabled, got a car for his 18th birthday when he needed one to go to college, and the entitled wife and YOUNGER stepson expect a car as well? Wow.
Nancy's stepdad. You have a wife problem, not a stepdaughter problem. Tell her to take the photos into her room or they will be thrown away. Tell in-laws to mind their own business. No, it's not stepdaughter's home. It is the step dad's home.
I’m sorry…HOW exactly is OP TA in that first story…? So step daughter is a rude, disrespectful girl who constantly treats OP like crap while living in his house, then puts up pictures of her mother and father together and then he’s somehow in the wrong because he got angry…? Really…? He’s just asking to be treated with basic decency. No OP is NTA and his step daughter IS abusing him (yes children CAN abuse adults)
He's the Step-Father and so Is Obviously Wrong Because HOW DARE he not let the little shithead keep acting like it's his fault her parents can't stand each other anymore and got divorced. Stepdaughter sounds like someone who watched the parent trap a few times too much and needs to accept that her parents are divorced and not going to get back together.
When comments claim stepparents shouldn't have any say in the upbringing of stepchildren, I'm now always thinking about the post where the stepdaughter bullied the mother's bio kid and it ended with the stepdaughter throwing hot liquid into the mother's face...
Kids need authority figures in the home, and doubly so for steps. This is because, many times, stepkids have some level of dislike or animosity towards their stepparent. I know I did. My parents were never married, but when my stepdad showed up in my life I hated his guts. But he was a constant authority figure throughout my youth. Even if I didn't like him, I was made to respect him. I love that man now. From a boy who misses his dad, I'm a man with two dads, and I feel lucky I had both. Without being made to respect his rules and authority I might have been like the stepdaughter.
@@BaoHadir my case was different, I always hated my stepfather, but because he was a POS, he never treated my mother right even during her cancer treatment, always arguing over petty stuff, he even physically hit me when I was 16 when I was defending my mother against his verbal abuse. When she passed away he had the nerve to try to film her coffin and desrespecting the whole funeral, and apparently he was also cheating on her. Unfortunately my mom was never lucky with men, I think she only sticked around for him to help pay her treatment. He still alive and kicking, life can be so unfair. Glad you have a good one, seriously.
Wow, another step parent who can't win no matter what he does. He can put up with it and be continually stomped on or he could fight it and be the asshole who's trying to replace his step daughter's dad or exclude her from the family or something equally as awful. NTA, but don't expect Op come out on top here no matter what he does. Reddit (r/AITA in particular) is a weird place with weird people. Teens are treated like they don't know right from wrong and adult men can't have feelings. Also double standards....lots of double standards.
@@JosieJOK and a judge could potentially try to put him on the hook for step children. in my state you can do that. Kind of a major reason no one dates single moms here. I mean theyll hook up, but that is about it.
Well, in the next story, OP was judged TA for expecting stepdad to buy a car for her son. Reddit is just full of different people with differing opinions. I do believe the judgment was wrong with the pictures. The last comment was correct. Stepparents are still PARENTS and can dole out punishment, and yes, he should be respected in his own home, regardless of who else's home it is.
For the first story: switch the OP's gender. Fairly certain the YTAers would have sung a different tune. For the klepto sister story: file a report on the sister. The mother is setting the sister up for failure, as the outside world will be less kind!
No it would still be the same lol And on reddit there has been Stories like this with the genders flipped and the op still got roasted for being an immature child instead of being an adult lol
@@WobblesandBean Oh yeah right it's filled with people with different opinions and sometimes those opinions clash And it makes it really hard to figure out what's standard everyone should have but there is one thing that I always see stepparents are always told to back the fuck up.
@@saratronus and they are told that pretty much regardless of what's been done too them. Makes me think that the redditors are just taking their own broken home issues out on the OPs.
@@nicholashodges201 yeah but something about this story rubs me the wrong way like this girl accuse this man of cheating ruining her family and he never addressed why she thinks that and the fact the custody agreement clearly states that she has to spend time with them when she clearly doesn't it not sitting right it sounds like a story we've heard before from the kids perspective it's not just me right the actions the kid doesn't this sound familiar right??
@@saratronus not really. My sister did that with my dad and he met my mother *years* after she split w my sister's dad. That happens all the time. The kids are pissed at Mom & Dad, but they take it out on the step parents, and the bio let's it happen b/c they don't want it directed at *them*. Further, even IF OP was mom's AP it does not justify mom allowing the kid to just flat out BS an @$$hole to OP. She's a teenager, she's old enough she's doing these things deliberately and maliciously.
Maybe I'd be the ah but those pics would mysteriously disappear, one by one. She was deliberately trying to get his goat. As it is i can barely tolerate my own teenagers at times... and I LOVE them.
If i was the first OP I would be petty and get the divorce papers and a 30 day eviction notice drawn up, then I would tell the brat to go give these to your mother and tell her that you have won and how happy you are about it.
Final Story: NTA. Oh no, your SIL doesn’t want to talk to you? How will she know next week’s personality traits. Tell your In-Laws that if SIL is inconsolable then that’s only because she’s copying the self esteem issues your wife has.
Second story obviously you're in the wrong here you expected your husband to buy your son his stepson a new car and you had planted the seeds in your son's head and when he got a PS5 instead of a car he lost his mind. You need to prepare yourself for the breakdown of not only your son and your husband's relationship with him but your own relationship with your son in the process. Not to mention the fact that this could lead to the breakdown and the destruction of your own marriage to say the least
Honestly as a gamer I would be thrilled to get a PS5 considering how hard they are to come by. A car would be more expensive but a PS5 was either super expensive(seen them going for $1000+) or he had to do some real digging to get one. A lot of people had to sign up for specific email lists to even have a chance to purchase one within a small window of time.
first story are people serious? They expect op to let the step daughter put old pictures of her "happy family" all around his house to remind him of his wife's ex? Would they be ok if it happened to them? The step daughter could've put it up in her bedroom but no, she had to display it all around the house and make op feel unwelcome in his own home. What's all this bs about excusing a child for bad behaviour just because they're a child. She was constantly rude to him and taunted him about it and I think op's reaction is reasonable. So what, op needs to be the adult in the relationship by allowing her to just do whatever she wants in the house that he also lives in? What next? If she decides to put a large picture of her "parents" in the living room as the centre piece is op also expected to act the adult and allow it? If she takes pictures of op and her mother down and only display "her parents" pictures in the house where guests could see is op supposed to allow it too? Where does this end?
On Story number one the teenager is doing it on PURPOSE to push and push and push him away further and further. She doesn't understand why her parents broke up in the 1st place. I could be wrong, but I think she thinks if this guy wasn't around my mom and dad can get back together. Mom NEEEDS to have a series conversation about why her and dad split up so she can see the truth.
'Bingo. Stepdaughter has convinced herself that if she can just get rid of her stepfather, her parents will make up and get back together and she will have her old 'happy family' back. She's literally telling her stepfather 'I will start listening to you when you divorce my mom and leave us alone!' It's not OP's fault that his new wife and her ex didn't make it clear to daughter that their breakup is final and that they will never get back together. Helping their daughter to deal with their divorce is the parents responsibility.
SD was setting OP up and he fell for it. She wanted to make him upset so they could have that fight over something "small" so she can cry to her grandparents and dad. OP should of ignored the pictures till the SD got bored of that plot
Wow the people on that first story. Usually redditors are ALL FOR "your house your rules" when it's dealing with In Laws but not a spiteful, bratty stepchild disrespecting him in his own house? He punished her for her attitude and that "idiot" comment.
With the last story, you're not in the wrong here but you need to prepare yourself for your wife to just apologize for the sake of keeping peace in the family. Your wife is all honesty is one of those people who has been so beaten down mentally and emotionally that I don't think people realize the severity of it. Think about it there's obvious unapologetic favoritism going on here and the fact that you're the first person in the family to call it out tells me that they know you're right they just aren't going to face it. My advice to you you and your wife need to go to counseling for her to move past this and also I strongly prepare yourself to basically go low contact with her side family because you're sister-in-law will do anything to make sure she's on top and your wife is below the bottom. In addition I strongly suggest that you make sure that your wife has limited contact with her side of the family because they will only beat her down so badly that it would make her question her sense of existence to begin with
Why should Step-dad buy the stepson he meet as a late teen a car just because bio son got one... A console is a extremely generous gift, I would have expected a gift card or something like that. Mom should buy her son a car, it's her responsibility, how can't she see that, so idiotic.
Mostly NTA in story 1. She's being a brat n brats gets punished. The photos can stay in her room, that brat. Id he throwing them into her room YTA for car story, but if he was 18 it would be different. As then it would be different treatment of kids. Or is the stepdad idk not another parent raising the stepson? All 3 should be buying the car Call a cop for ipad one
First story u don’t put up pictures of u, dad & mom around your stepdads house. That’s disrespectful. Keep them in your room. Now I had a situation of pictures with my ex & deceased baby girl. They were oil paintings taken 2 weeks before she died. I had them n my livingroom my apartment. Well my 2nd husband said he had no problem with them but when I moved n his house he suddenly had a problem. I put them in my 2nd daughters room. The only reason I wanted them up was because of her.
Op, she doesn't need to come over until she can respect you in Your house. And let your wife know she can leave if it happens again. I am so tired of kids like this. Sounds like she never gave you a chance. And yes I do have experience with this subject over and over because of my mom.
But you know his wife is not going to do that there is a major part of this woman that has so much fear of losing her child that she's willing to basically be a doormat to her daughter taking out her anger and frustrations out on her husband. And if there was an affair going on between the mother and the original poster you better believe she's going to make his life a living hell for the next 2 years otherwise the mother is just basically letting him have it unless because she doesn't want to lose her daughter at 18 but she also doesn't want to lose her marriage. And to be honest I'm already getting the sense that if she loses her marriage she will blame her daughter and her daughter will go no contact with her at 18 that's what's going to happen
@@BIGEAGLEDUDE If it's his house, then if his wife wants to see the kid...she can go rent/buy a place to spend time with HER kid where HER kid can put up all of the pictures of her previous marriage that she wants to.
@@SnowyWolborg This. I also remember another story of a step daughter who accused her step father of sexual assault (her bio dad also egged her on to do this) which caused the step father to divorce the mom. It was revealed that the step daughter lied and the mother not once made the step daughter apologize for what she did. It was awful.
I'm just trying to figure out where all these commenters are getting that OP never liked the daughter and never made her feel welcome? Where does it say that? Did I miss something? And no matter if there was an affair or not, the daughter will always view OP as the person who "broke up her family" just for simply being married to her mother.
@@SnowyWolborg I think you're absolutely right. Most definitely plenty of projection going on. But that's the norm for most of these commenters on Reddit.
Regarding 2:19 Spoiler alert, the house is NOT the child's property. Allowing the child to be disrespectful is the child choosing to leave. If the fem parental figure objects, it can go too. O.P.'s house, O.P.'s rules. Don't like it? Go somewhere else to live. Simple. 👍
You need a better picture to superimpose the text of the stories. It's next to impossible to read them. I mute the videos so I can read at my pace (which is faster than you reading/voicing the video. Please do better so the text can be seen more easily. Thanks.
Story 1: It’s hard to say absolutely if you’re the ahole without knowing the full story because it sounds like whatever beef you and your stepdaughter have, has been ongoing awhile. However, it’s a a bit tyrannical of you to deny her pics of her past. Even IF you have issues with her spreading them around the house for what it seems you believe was just to annoy or antagonize you, you could and should have compromised and let her at least keep them displayed in her room. Story 2: Stop right there!! I think your missing something. You said EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY for the older brother? Why would you or ANYONE expect a sixteen year old would get the same gift? It might be different treatment IF it was both their 18th birthday but it’s not. 18 is a much different more responsible mature milestone than 16. So YTA. (Besides a console is a great gift and depending on the car and number of included games and accessories, it might be just as expensive.)
If she wants to hang those photo's in her room, that's fine. But she doesn't get to spread pics of her past and her 'happy family' thoughtout the whole house against OP's wishes. That's so disrespectful. SD may live there, but it's not HER house. It's OP's house.
@@LKLG1990 umm I’m not sure if your comment is meant to disagree with mine or not but I actually said the same thing, which is basically if stepdad tries to apply a ban to her room, he might be the ahole because while forcing her choices on the whole house is overstepping, decorating her own room is not. That may not have been crystal clear but that’s what my previous post said. Again though I’m not sure if you agreeing with me or disagreeing and making points against my post as I can’t tell from the content. Apologies if I made a mistake or offended.
They're assuming this based on the daughter's comment that OP " broke up their family". Whether there was an affair or not, the daughter will always see OP as the person who "broke up her family" simply because he's married to her mother.
His attitude? Are you fucking serious, wow, he is the home owner and she did this only to hurt him? Just because her parents fucked up she doesn't get to take it out on him, being a stroppy teen is no excuse to be downright nasty to the guy
That's the point. She was lookin for, no NEEDED a scapegoat to blame for her parents divorce, someone to take it out on. And OP is/was an easy target. But no, OP is just supposed to take it and let it happen? He's just supposed to let SD act that way without consequences? I call BS.
Why are people so Ridiculous in their thinking, She's a Child that can call Him an Idiot but should get away with BAD BEHAVIOUR that was Deliberate. Info Alert!!? SHE is very, very AWARE of the impact of Her Behaviour and so kept it Up for Maximum Impact.
This is the reason why so many entitled people and Karens are running around the world. I'm with OP, I refuse to have my place of peace violated by anyone. If that teenager hates it there, she can leave. If her mom is offended, she can leave too until everyone learns to behave apprpriately
lol i swear to god so many of these reddit stories have female antagonizers literally crying their eyes out when someone...anyone...calls them out on their bullshit. It is hilarious.
For the first story: I'm not gonna say YTA or NTA because idk if the house was OPs or both sides of the stories. But I think the daughter needs some therapy because it sounds like she has some issues. And it might sound like from when she said "you ruined this family" that the mom had an affair with OP and that's effecting her majorly, and her mom is trying to play happy family like everything is fine, tbh I wouldn't be surprised if she moved in with dad or grandparents and went no contact with them.
Story 1: YTA/ESH, her attitude sucks (unless your relationship is the result of an affair)..... But your "my house" comments are also stupid, your married it is the marital house and she lives there. And yes her putting pictures with her dad around the house is also AHish. The best thing to do is get into therapy (both you and her). Story 2: YTA, you never promise that someone else will buy them a particular gift for your son.... On top of that your son turned 16 not 18.
I can tell you how she broke into the safe. Depending if it's an electronic lock you are supposed to input your own personal code instead of the one it comes with. Most safe manufacturers have their base codes online or can be requested online. Always rekey a safe or strong box once you get it home.
story 1: how is OP TA for setting a clear boundary about not wanting photos of his wife's EX in the common areas of HIS home? she can keep them in HER room, not the bloody kitchen or living room. seriously what the hell is wrong with people? also, it takes 2 to cheat and her mom is just as guilty. if not more so, for the situation. this is how i always view the married partner in an affair. story 2: I don't think the kid was TA, he was disappointed (thanks to his mom) and removed himself from the area instead of throwing a tantrum in front of everyone. I think that shows some maturity on his part.
Call me kooky, but I think the issue in the first story is less with the pictures themselves, and more with the way the step daughter keeps insisting that they're some kind of proof that his wife's failed marriage was happy, and could be that way again if OP wasn't there.
I agree with the nta on story 1 and feel the only reason people are saying yta is because of the fact he was an affair partner. I detest cheaters however it is not relevant to the story and doesn't affect my judgement [Edit] so apparently there wasn't even cheating involved which makes it even more of a nta for me
Stir 1: NTA don’t get upset instead be petty and take out the frustration by getting loud in the bedroom with her mother. Give her mother so much love and attention it pisses off step daughter to no end. Story 2: screw you OP
@@thegayestgoth "you need to be hanged", and you need to grown tf up already and get a dose of reality instead of putting make believe words in someone else's mouth. nowhere does it even mention infidelity. yeah, and this "kid" isn't a kid no more and is 2 years away from being an adult lol. not to mention, she already knows what she's doing. and if you're going to talk about abus then point out what she's doing as well bc then you're just another enabler
He's the one that chose to sleep with a married woman Is grown up to deal with the consequences. All we have is the daughter screaming you ruined my family and then OP refusing to give us any information about that. Which is Sus lol
OP NTA I also don't feel bad for abby and she sounds like one of those people who need to go to drink and cause all types of problems, rumors, others drama scenes and thing to get attention and to ruin your wedding. Am a little worried she might get alcohol poisoning if she keeps drinking. Make sure a security person is there to kick her out if she tries to come to the wedding or reception.
For the story about the step daughter and the photos, NTA. I hate the whole "but she is a kid" excuse for shitty behavior. All the comments saying it is her home are not wrong but it is also OPs. If he doesn't want photos of his wifes ex all over his house, that is his roght. She can keep those photos in her room. And unless her Mom cheated on her Dad with OP, the step daughter needs to quit being a brat and needs to go to therapy.
Just wow, so it is ok to be disrespectful to your step parent . This is why so many kids are out of control and have no respect. She needs to get a grip
That sister is a klepto and needs serious therapy for it, she admitted that she can't help it so hopefully the mom finally does right by sending her to get help. It'll only get worse as she gets older and if she steals from a store then she could go to jail...
Story 2 YTA, did you honestly think that a step parent would make such a huge purchase without consulting you? No one in their right mind would buy a car for a child without consulting the parents
Story 3: NTA. Hun I’m not going to lie. I would have jumped my Sister if that had happened. Your Parents need to do more than just take her party money away. But unfortunately your Mom is going to insist that much is unfair.
Story 1: Did the wife and daughter move into OP’s house? If yes, then it’s his house, his rules and he should expect respect from the stepdaughter - assuming that he does something to earn it and is not in the habit of taking stepdaughter’s electronics every five minutes for the slightest little thing!
Also, 16 is old enough to know what she is doing. If she keep it in her room it would be OK but putting it all around the house is not. Op may not have handled it the best way but, does anyone would feel OK having photos of their partner ex's around the house? Of course not. It's weird to have photos of exes around the house and disrespectful of the current partner.
I can't believe the redditor who said it's not a kids business how their parent got with their step parent. What a crock of crap! It IS a kid's business if someone screws over their parent with infidelity. Don't like being held accountable for being a cheating turd? Then dont do it, simple as that!
You know I always hate hearing: “They’re kids, they don’t know better” I was once a teenager and I NEVER disrespected elders, nor did I ever have to use: but I’m a kid excuse. Teenagers know the difference of right and wrong, I knew if I did something bad then I would sooner or later meet the consequences, but then again I was raised by a good family with good morals.
Why do parents/step-parents think they can control their kids saying it’s ‘their home’ ??? 1)They are a child living there, it’s their home as much as it is yours. 2) It definitely is her moms home too, she belongs there and you don’t get to parent her child
did you miss the part where she constantly called him an idiot and was placing pictures of her "happy family" all around the house that he's living in? She didn't put it in her room, she put it in public areas where guests can see with the express purpose of making him feel uncomfortable in his own home. Yah he doesn't get to parent a step child but he's also not obligated to put up with her bs. Also, if he can't parent her then her and her mum should pay for her share of the rent, utilities, groceries. you don't get free boarding, free food, internet, electricity and go harass the bill payer. The SD needs to learn some gratitude or go try that stunt at her dad's house.
“She swears she didn’t sell it or anything”
If OPs sister said that unprompted, she definitely sold it.
OP seems to think if she admitted to all the other stuff she would admit to that too. I disagree. If she admits to selling it she has to give OP the money.
"I hinted to him that it would most likely be a car." And why did you do that?
I agree. Why? Her son is 16, the other was 18 and needed the car for mobility. The only difference in treating the boys the husband was doing was being age specific.
Well she apparently couldn't take the criticism and took this nonsense down. Lol
@@lyndatuttle No, he got his son the car because of his disability which in my opinion makes no sense as a lot of people who have disabilities can't drive. Just because OP's son doesn't have a disability doesn't mean he shouldn't be able to drive. And I am guessing this is the states so the 16 yr old is at the age where he can drive. But I do agree with everyone else, OP is TA because she made her son believe that his stepdad would get him a car. She shouldn't have because it was not up to the stepdad. I think OP and her ex, if he is still in the picture, should buy their son a car themselves.
@@SNixon14 I think it's because his disability makes it harder for him to walk and use public transport. My mom is similar. She can't walk well or for long, but she's fine driving. And he's 18 so he'll presumably start being more independent and getting out of the house more.
*gold digger alert*
$1,000 iPad? "Lost" it? Rubbish.
she sold it for drugs.
Maybe mom is getting a kick-back given how eager she is to cover up and excuse her thievery.
Report it stolen and get it closed
Either that, or she's buying other things from the items she steals. I knew somebody that I stopped being friends with who would steal things and she'd either keep them for herself or she'd steal them to sell. She took something of mine and sold it to somebody at school and bought make up out of the money. My mother had to get the police involved.
In the story of the kleptomaniac sister who repeatedly “steals all the nice gifts Cal gets” the OP - have Cal leave one of HIS things with OP and when sister steals it, bring her up on charges! Since her mother encourages and supports her younger daughter in her stealing and lying (what a terrible parent!) and OP’s dad apparently has no spine to discipline his own daughter or punish her for stealing… maybe the police can?
Do parents not realize that raising children to not be lying, thieving little sociopaths is part of their job?
She had already stole one of Cal´s stuff (and there´s the evidence).
I would cut the father some slack though, it seemed like he already tried to discipline his daughter, but her mom overruled him.
I don't think the dad doesn't have a spine. He seems to be the type to punish sister, but the twat of a wife he married sabotages that and makes the dad's punishments invalid.
Maybe OP needs to take her Mothers things, hide them in sisters room and when Mother asks about them, just look at sister pointedly and leave. Maybe when Mother feels how OP feels she'll address the issue. 😂😂😂 Also, maybe OP can go to train station and ask if anyone turned in her IPad. Not likely but you never know, there are trustworthy people out there.
Is that in the parents handbook given when you get your first child? "Do not raise child to be lying thieving sociopaths." /sarcasm
You would think it would be obvious. Apparently not to the mother in the story. I think the mother was abetting her thieving golden child. Neither the golden child nor the mother are blameless.
@@thecoolgrandma7208 considering the sister doesn't take from her mother seems to me like she has some control over it, otherwise she would already, or maybe she does, but the mother just brushes it off like, "I gave it to her".
I wonder, if she's that much of a tea leaf is she stealing from shops also? She definitely needs constant supervision.
2nd story...Why on Earth would you expect your 16 year old son to get a car from your husband, because husband bought one for his son's 18th Birthday as he's going to college?
And why would you tell the kid to expect that?! A new console is a great gift, their like $500.
Yeah, scarce as they still are, some of us gamers would kill for a PS5 right about now!
Of course!
An 18-year-old with disabilities and going to college is EXACTLY like a healthy 16-year-old still in high school, right?
The major AH was the mother, getting her son all excited over getting a car she had absolutely no reason to expect her husband had gotten her son.
Forget about the disability. Older son is 18 and hes going to college. Younger son is 16, Yes he should get a car. When hes 18. Did older son get a car at 16. NO. If older son did get a car at 16 does that mean younger son should have gotten one at 14 to be fair. YTA
I hate these posts where a 16 year old is referred to as a “child” when they do unacceptable things and then as an “almost adult” otherwise. One or the other people. OP in the first story has had to put up with rude, ignorant behavior from his stepdaughter for 2 (and probably more) years. Where does OP get to draw the line, when it seems pretty obvious he’s getting no support from his wife?
Right? Guess the people of Reddit failed to read the part where the stepdaughter was the one being antagonistic. At 16, she’s more than old enough to know what she’s doing is wrong. She needs a therapist.
@@AuskaDezjArdamaath She needs her parents to get together, sit her down - maybe even with a therapist - and calmly but firmly explain to her that the divorce is final, that they aren't getting back together ever again. Getting rid of OP will not change anything and treating him that way will have consequences. She doesn't have to like him, but she doesn't get to disrespect him when she's at that house. She's entitled to be mad and upset about the divorce, but that doesn't mean she gets to behave like that and get away with it. She's 16, old enough to know better.
Thank you. The amount of people on Reddit who treat these 16-18 year olds like they’re 5 year olds and completely write off all of their horrible behavior are ridiculous. Then OP sets an extremely reasonable boundary, and the people on Reddit just sit there on their moral high horse, ready to absolutely bash OP because “she’s just a kid!!!”. It’s ridiculous. She’s living at OP’s house and she already doesn’t respect him, but now she’s starting to press buttons, break boundaries and see how far she can take things. She knows exactly what she’s doing, and so does OP. It is beyond ridiculous to say that OP is the a-hole here solely because he punished a disrespectful brat (in his own home). I mean it’s quite obvious her mom and dad aren’t actually parenting her. The bare minimum when you live in someone’s house is to pretend like you’re polite strangers. You don’t have to be close, don’t have to spend time together, but you do need to treat that person with even the most basic of respect. And the 16 year old can’t even meet that extremely low bar.
OP is NTA, and suggesting that he should just sit there and take it and not punish her and let her continue to constantly disrespect him in his own home, is ridiculous.
Yep, I hate this, my parents divorced when I was much younger than 16. I never acted as a brat towards their new partners, never close because I didn't need or want a stepmother or stepfather because I already had a mother and father and didn't need a stranger filling that role but also never disrespect and been rude to them. It also helped that they respect my boundaries and didn't overstepped their roles as my parents partners and nothing more.
Teenagers are mentally retarded they can understand complex social dynamics, social hierarchy and proper social behavior. They chose not to if they were thought through life that they can get away with shit behavior. Which clearly given the mother and grandparents behavior, enabling her (like erasing a crime does erase the need for a sentence, the police capture a thief and give me back the stolen items doesn't means he can walk away free), she didn't learn. The step-dad is teaching this girl a really valuable lesson.
Honestly it sounds like they read stepdaughter calling OP a homewrecker and ran with that as if it were gospel
Story 1 - If she wants to keep pictures in her bedroom, which is her space, that is fine. But putting them in common areas in the house that are shared seems to be what the crossed line for the OP was. Maybe say she can keep the pictures in her room, see if that would be a compromise for the situation.
I believe Op would have been fine with that
First story- I was in a similar situation and my answer was to outdo my stepchild by getting large poster style copies of the offending photos. And I placed them in prominent positions throughout the house. The stepdaughter was baffled by my behavior and I just said that a photo was nothing but a piece of paper with ink on it. And as long as it wasn’t an inappropriate photo it would be welcome to cover the flaws in the plaster.
She gave up trying to upset me. And I laughed for weeks at her disappointment in my response.
She asked me if she could take them down within a couple of months.
Those YTA comments are just freaking projecting thinking about all the stepparents are bad guys, and seriously need therapy. If they are not blind enough not to miss the mistreatment that was happening.
Are they gonna say the same shit when it comes to domestic abuse? At this rate it would not surprise me
@@Symphonia30 Nah, I think it's an ESH situation. And I use that rating rarely. But it seems that this marriage is new and the stepdaughter is probably trying to come to terms with the fact that her bio parents weren't together anymore, and then you have OP who's trying to come to terms with having a stepdaughter who still sees him as an invader.
They both need therapy, tbh.
@@Callimo no, just her, kid or not that does not make it okay. Otherwise if she hates it there that much then she can go live with her father. She does get a pass for being a disrespectful idiot when Op has been nothing but civil towards her. But did she return that respect back, no? Respect is a two way street. She’s the one who needs therapy.
@@Symphonia30 I dunno, Op may be respectable off reddit, but the post comes off as this dislike is mutual. Teens still process shit differently than adults, and sometimes divorces hit some of them really hard because they really thought their parents were going to be together forever.
OP can talk with someone who can explain why the teen feels the way she does and the teen can talk with a therapist to process her feelings of loss and how to channel those things in more constructive ways.
There aren't any bad guys, just a whole bunch of hurt people trying to process life.
@@Callimo would you ever tolerate a disrespectful teenager and they even let them call you a mother F in your own home? She is 16 not 5 years old, at that age, she knows what she is doing.
I hope there’s an update on the story
Kid is so upset that he (only) got an EIGHT HUNDRED dollar game that he went to cry in his room at his own bd party. ?!?! I got a $24 socket set at 16, which I used at work for several years.
I would love to get any gift for my birthday.
They knew how to make things back then am I right
I only threw a hissy fit over presents once in my life. It was when I was around 5 and everyone bought me clothes instead of toys. My parents gave me the 'be grateful for what you have because other kids don't have' speech, and I never threw a tantrum about presents again. Was I disappointed some years? Yes, but I kept it to myself. I'm 34 now, and I've never had a bad birthday since. Why? Because I'm grateful for what I get. In fact, I love getting clothes that fit for birthdays and Christmas, because good clothes aren't cheap.
I got a pair of socks that I wore until they had holes in them
My mother got it in her head that she would not give me any gifts which would be silly or fun for years. For years, I got socks. Gold toe over the ankle white socks. As a child, it was a bummer, but I enjoyed them as an adult.
I don't get why OP's mom doesn't think the youngest is a thief then sister literally takes items from others and loses them. Also the fact that when that happens, that the owner of the item doesn't deserve to be told or have the item replaced. Really feel like sister is a klepto. Thank goodness OP's dad is on OP's side. He needs to get sister into therapy
Maybe mom is a sociopath? She seems to lack the ability to parent, hold her kid accountable, teach her child morals.
I thought kleptomania was a form of impulse control. As in oooh that’s pretty (pocket). Not figuring out the code to a safe and taking off the case. That takes forethought.
Agreed, I'm glad OP's dad had her back but it does show her sister needs some heavy duty therapy if the stealing really is coming from manic episodes rather than Spoiled Princess Syndrome. On top of adding some consequences to put it into her head that stealing is wrong, OP's mom needs to have an ultimatum put down to either stop enabling this behavior or a divorce may be in her future.
@@karenbanda1100 that's my understanding. My sister is klepto. She has been since before I can remember. Would even break the walls to hide her stolen goods behind posters and stuff. My mum has enabled her, like the mother in the story. She doesn't want for anything. Has plenty of money but still steals things. She stopped seeing her therapist because my mum convinced her that the therapist was wrong about her kleptomania. 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
I don’t buy for one minute the iPad was lost. I’m pretty sure sticky fingers has it in her room. I only hope for OPs sake she backed it up to the cloud so she can restore all her data. Then hopefully she can remotely wipe it in case there is sensitive data on the iPad.
iPad story: ummmm, call the cops!! Report it stolen!! Mommy can’t save her precious when U do that!!
Love the content. One suggestion: maybe set the text font to have a black outline around the white letters. That way, you can still read it when the text scrolls over a white or light background. :)
Story with the OP that told son he'd get a car is totally the AH. I mean, why isn't OP talking to husband about what gift you'd BOTH be giving son? This shouldn't be a shock on the day. OMG heaven forbid you actually talk to your husband about his stepson's birthday!
i was wondering why op was surprised. she didn't get the gift for her own son?
Klepto sister: I really hope that the dad gets a divorce. I know that I would divorce my wife asap if she would keep enabling my Klepto daughter instead of protecting the other kids. How would I, as the dad, be able to raise my child right and correct behavior like that if my own wife keeps undermining my efforts because she favors one child above the other two? If I have to separate the other two children from the klepto child to protect them, then I would do it in a heartbeat.
The mom is so out of touch with reality, it's upsetting to read.
Kleptomania is an actual condition, but what's described in this story seems more targeted than impulse stealing. Why wasn't OP able to get a deadbolt installed on her bedroom door? Why isn't her sister getting help for her condition? Why are OP's belongings being destroyed as well as stolen? Why did the mom know the sister had the tablet on the train, and didn't take it back from her to safeguard it so it wouldn't be left behind? Is mom's stuff getting stolen and damaged too?
The klepto story, wow, there is obviously something wrong with the sister. I've heard of people stealing but stealing from everyone? That's crazy. And their mother enables it. I suppose she is the golden child in the mother's eyes. Well, if OP's parents don't do something about this like punishing her than she will get worse as she gets older.
I agree. Klepto Karen could wind up doing some serious jail time.
Ops sister is definitely a kleptomaniac which could have been discovered earlier on hadn't her mum kept enabling her hope she gets the help she needs.
Agree. Maybe mom enabled it in hope for something expensive that the mom could take
My Thoughts exactly
Mom’s a POS but Don’t forget that dad has done *nothing* as well!
Story 3: If the safe she had is a keypad one, I would check the area around it, because chances are the sister put a camera up to catch her inputting the code. That or she coated the keys with a substance that leaves finger prints, which appears in UV light. Believe me it happens.
If this sister can’t help herself stealing she is on for a world or hurt. The outside world will not forgive a thief. This child is heading straight for jail and this mom is setting her children up for failure.
If that´s what happened, then sister´s excuse of "can´t help her stealing impulse" is a total lie, because it means she totally planned it, not a "I saw it lying around and got a sudden impulse to take it" case.
just watch the Lock Picking Lawyer. he tears those things apart
@@BY-bj6ic Seriously, commercially available safes are there to stop mostly honest people from snooping and the like, not a dedicated thief from getting into it. LPL gets into those safes with part of an orange juice bottle!
@@alliekingsley7919
i completely agree with you
I would have clocked the sister that stole things. She needs to pay off every cent for it and see if she could either locate the iPad or see if there’s a way to have her pay for the pictures to be recovered.
Story 1: NTA. Oh the photos are gone so SUDDENLY the outright disrespect she has been constantly showing you no long exist. I’d be more on her side if it was just photos in her room but she is constantly trying to antagonize you. She needs adult punishments.
This is why you dont get with single parents nothing but misery and pain
@@shiningsun3159 Not all stepkids are deluded brats.
If a stepkid was that disrespectful to my mom she would not hesitate to kick her out. Stepdaughter does not get a free pass just for being an idiot and being a kid. The hell are these YTA smoking? I guess they are probably projecting their own insecurities again thinking all stepparents are bad guys. Judging from these comments they’re clearly not reading properly
@@Symphonia30 At 16 she can drive, hold a job, and decide what parent she wanted to live with if custody were revisited. I mean she isn't an adult, but she isn't a kid.
At 16 she knows exactly what she doing.
She isn’t a child She’s 16 plus she’s the one not wanting a relationship with the step dad not him nta
For those of us who simply read the video rather than listen to it, the last few backgrounds have been difficult to deal with.
Story one: NTA. You are with her mom, if the daughter doesn't like that, she can stay with her dad.
I'm not sure what the ages are but if she's not above a certain age then she has to be there because of split custody. That's the only reason I say ESH. TBH, I probably wouldn't respect my mom and stepdad either if they had an affair. And the guy does sound like he didn't care about the kid to begin with. She is being a little annoying, but the most she did was put family photos in a few places. She's not actually damaging anything she just hurt his feelings because he knows that she's not really wrong about them.
@@untitled-gv3qp if your parent forces you to cohabitate with strangers you don't respect or want around you I say do whatever you want to both of em. There no age requirement for making people respect your boundaries. That mom is trash.
My thoughts, exactly. That, or stay with paternal relatives, until she turns 18, and gets her own place.
@@untitled-gv3qp ugh, that's not at all all she did. She constantly calls him names and disrespects him in a house that he pays for, eats food he pays for, etc... This is on the mom though. She should've cut this out from the beginning.
@@untitled-gv3qp It's not HER house, it's OP's house. So SD doesn't get to spread photo's of her 'happy family' around the house against OP's wishes. She doesn't get to disrespect Op in his own house and get away with it every time. Her parents got divorced and she's upset about it. She's entitled to those feelings, but that doesn't mean SD should be allowed to treat OP that way again and again without any consequences. She's trying to drive OP away on purpose because she thinks and is hoping that once OP is removed from the picture, her mom and dad can and will get back together again.
Her mom needs to put a stop to that behaviour. Right now. SD is 16, not 6. She's old enough to know better
In the first story, it would be different if those pictures were in her room, but she's just being spiteful. If she hates it at her stepdad's house so bad, she should go elsewhere. I would never accept that in a house I pay bills for.
I wouldn't want photos of her mother all over my house if I was her step mother, but having them in her room would be fine. And I definitely wouldn't put up with the verbal disrespect.
@@dulcilass Exactly. I'm a step-parent, and I've been a stepchild, so I understand both sides of the coin. To your point, it's about respect - the stepfather in this situation isn't saying that they don't want to acknowledge the life his wife had before him, but if he's taking care of her, she needs to be respectful.
@@SnowyWolborg And all of God's children said AMEN 🙏 😎
Spencer, I bet she'd jump at the change to "go elsewhere" since OP kept repeating that it was HIS house, not THEIR house.
Story 1, whats with reddit always siding with the vengeful step child whos step parent did nothing wrong to them. Op is NTA, and honestly id divorce and see who the brat will blame next
Tbh Reddit gets really stupid sometimes and makes no sense at all
Because I’ve seen multiple story’s where the op was clearly nta and all the comments were saying yta
Because they are teenagers themselves.
Reddit is a weird place with weird people. Teens are treated like they don't know right from wrong and adult men can't have feelings. Also double standards....lots of double standards.
These Redditor commenters are just projecting bias idiots. And judging from the responses it’s clear that they don’t read or just ignore the important details
Story 2: YTA. Sorry but you know the saying. “When you assume you make an As out of su and me”. The circumstances are different and ultimately this was never promised so yes, your in the wrong.
The first story reminded me of my teen years. My mothers second husband (referred to as AH) banned all photos in the house, apparently they just collected dust and he wouldn't have it. But he had photos of his daughters in their bedroom.Years later I realised it was because he was threatened by the photos of my father around the house. The kicker... my parents marriage only ended because my father died. So this jerk was threatened by a dead man - but was happy to wear his clothes, carry his briefcase to work every day and sleep in his bed.
1st Story, NTA. OP asked for one thing and this brat is acting like removing those photos like getting rid of jewelry or something then has the audacity to be disrespectful. Single parents love to complain about why no one wants them but can't seem to grasp that not only them but their child(ren) determine how far the relationship goes. I wouldn't be surprised if OP's wife finds her single for a 2nd time.
If not good from day one do not marry her mother or dad with children
Definitely the AH. Him and his wife are cheaters and the mom is now forcing her kid to cohabitate with people who don't respect her or her father. Her retaliatory disrespect is both earned and to be expected. I wish the daughter the best of luck. A good parent wouldn't be scum or bring scum around their kids.
My parents were divorced when I was nine and if I’d have acted like that to someone either of them were just dating I’d have gotten my butt whooped! At any age and my parents weren’t big on spanking but disrespectfulness was right up there for reasons they would! And the mom and other family members sticking their noses in it aren’t helping! Personally, I was thrilled when my parents split up! No more arguments/fights that my mom started and all witnessed by me and my younger siblings! My mom was a cheater and dad still would’ve busted my behind for treating the other guy with disrespect!
@@VRDejaVu I mean... There's pretty strong implications with the daughter's word choice of "you tore this family apart" and OP not denying that. Without confirmation, thats a bit damning and puts the daughter's anger and actions in a different context - along with calling into question the truthfulness of OP's description of the situation.
@@VRDejaVu I don't call into question the words of the daughter because this is not a post she's made of the situation from her prospective. Its a post made by someone else, so what OP has stated the daughter has said would need to be taken more at face value, and as anything we hear from him is painted with an obvious bias towards himself. This is not to say him having bias is necessarily *wrong* in of itself - everyone has some level of bias in any situation because though they (might) have a good grasp on their *own* thoughts, actions, justifications, etc., they rarely have the same of others. So, no, not a double standard.
STOP seeing nearly adult teenagers as little kids, they know exactly what they're doing.
If I got a game console from my parents I would be ecstatic. If I was told I was getting a car and a console showed up I'd be hopping mad. I'm 42. Don't blame the kid for his reaction.
Blame the OP for assuming the stepdad would get him the car
if you are going to use the white print for the subtitles, please make sure they are on a dark background. i couldn't read most of the stories this time. i am very hard of hearing, and there are many totally deaf folks out here, and we rely on the subtitles. thank you.
Story 2: so Jack’s actual son, who is disabled, got a car for his 18th birthday when he needed one to go to college, and the entitled wife and YOUNGER stepson expect a car as well? Wow.
Nancy's stepdad. You have a wife problem, not a stepdaughter problem. Tell her to take the photos into her room or they will be thrown away. Tell in-laws to mind their own business. No, it's not stepdaughter's home. It is the step dad's home.
I’m sorry…HOW exactly is OP TA in that first story…?
So step daughter is a rude, disrespectful girl who constantly treats OP like crap while living in his house, then puts up pictures of her mother and father together and then he’s somehow in the wrong because he got angry…?
Really…?
He’s just asking to be treated with basic decency.
No OP is NTA and his step daughter IS abusing him (yes children CAN abuse adults)
But it a dude
@@MrHelicx I'm sorry but I don't understand your post.
@@dulcilass they are saying since op is a man that automatically makes him an asshole in that sub reddit
He's the Step-Father and so Is Obviously Wrong Because HOW DARE he not let the little shithead keep acting like it's his fault her parents can't stand each other anymore and got divorced.
Stepdaughter sounds like someone who watched the parent trap a few times too much and needs to accept that her parents are divorced and not going to get back together.
@@f687sNFM thank u
XO do you think you could put a transparent black box around the words? I couldn't read it like at all and I enjoy reading along with listening
Hello, could you put a dark background around the text? It's quite often hard to read.
When comments claim stepparents shouldn't have any say in the upbringing of stepchildren, I'm now always thinking about the post where the stepdaughter bullied the mother's bio kid and it ended with the stepdaughter throwing hot liquid into the mother's face...
Kids need authority figures in the home, and doubly so for steps. This is because, many times, stepkids have some level of dislike or animosity towards their stepparent. I know I did. My parents were never married, but when my stepdad showed up in my life I hated his guts. But he was a constant authority figure throughout my youth. Even if I didn't like him, I was made to respect him. I love that man now. From a boy who misses his dad, I'm a man with two dads, and I feel lucky I had both. Without being made to respect his rules and authority I might have been like the stepdaughter.
@@BaoHadir my case was different, I always hated my stepfather, but because he was a POS, he never treated my mother right even during her cancer treatment, always arguing over petty stuff, he even physically hit me when I was 16 when I was defending my mother against his verbal abuse. When she passed away he had the nerve to try to film her coffin and desrespecting the whole funeral, and apparently he was also cheating on her. Unfortunately my mom was never lucky with men, I think she only sticked around for him to help pay her treatment. He still alive and kicking, life can be so unfair. Glad you have a good one, seriously.
Reddit thinks step parents should be a ATM and a door mat
@@joaolima7131 sorry you had to go through that 😞
I have a older brother that's a thief . We haven't been close for the last fifty years .
And like why should you if your brother is anything like Op sister then he would only bring misery to your life
Wow, another step parent who can't win no matter what he does. He can put up with it and be continually stomped on or he could fight it and be the asshole who's trying to replace his step daughter's dad or exclude her from the family or something equally as awful.
NTA, but don't expect Op come out on top here no matter what he does. Reddit (r/AITA in particular) is a weird place with weird people. Teens are treated like they don't know right from wrong and adult men can't have feelings. Also double standards....lots of double standards.
He could dump the wife and get away from this cray family.
@@JosieJOK and a judge could potentially try to put him on the hook for step children. in my state you can do that. Kind of a major reason no one dates single moms here. I mean theyll hook up, but that is about it.
Well, in the next story, OP was judged TA for expecting stepdad to buy a car for her son. Reddit is just full of different people with differing opinions. I do believe the judgment was wrong with the pictures. The last comment was correct. Stepparents are still PARENTS and can dole out punishment, and yes, he should be respected in his own home, regardless of who else's home it is.
AITA are honestly filled with people who will always find fault with the parents
For the first story: switch the OP's gender. Fairly certain the YTAers would have sung a different tune.
For the klepto sister story: file a report on the sister. The mother is setting the sister up for failure, as the outside world will be less kind!
No it would still be the same lol And on reddit there has been Stories like this with the genders flipped and the op still got roasted for being an immature child instead of being an adult lol
@@WobblesandBean Oh yeah right it's filled with people with different opinions and sometimes those opinions clash And it makes it really hard to figure out what's standard everyone should have but there is one thing that I always see stepparents are always told to back the fuck up.
@@saratronus and they are told that pretty much regardless of what's been done too them.
Makes me think that the redditors are just taking their own broken home issues out on the OPs.
@@nicholashodges201 yeah but something about this story rubs me the wrong way like this girl accuse this man of cheating ruining her family and he never addressed why she thinks that and the fact the custody agreement clearly states that she has to spend time with them when she clearly doesn't it not sitting right it sounds like a story we've heard before from the kids perspective it's not just me right the actions the kid doesn't this sound familiar right??
@@saratronus not really. My sister did that with my dad and he met my mother *years* after she split w my sister's dad.
That happens all the time. The kids are pissed at Mom & Dad, but they take it out on the step parents, and the bio let's it happen b/c they don't want it directed at *them*.
Further, even IF OP was mom's AP it does not justify mom allowing the kid to just flat out BS an @$$hole to OP. She's a teenager, she's old enough she's doing these things deliberately and maliciously.
Maybe I'd be the ah but those pics would mysteriously disappear, one by one. She was deliberately trying to get his goat. As it is i can barely tolerate my own teenagers at times... and I LOVE them.
If i was the first OP I would be petty and get the divorce papers and a 30 day eviction notice drawn up, then I would tell the brat to go give these to your mother and tell her that you have won and how happy you are about it.
Final Story: NTA. Oh no, your SIL doesn’t want to talk to you? How will she know next week’s personality traits. Tell your In-Laws that if SIL is inconsolable then that’s only because she’s copying the self esteem issues your wife has.
First Story: One of many reasons why marrying a single mother is problematic.
Or just dating one.
To be fair if the kid is ok it an be fine.
I wouldn't but I get it but why bother struggling with a brat who is not your blood
Kids like that truly bring out the worst and step kids.
Yaw didn't read between the lines did yaw op is the AP who help break up the step duaghters parents marriage
@@kingturtle24k81 Not according to the additional comments - stepdaughter merely assuemd and reached.
Yes and same goes for single fathers.
Second story obviously you're in the wrong here you expected your husband to buy your son his stepson a new car and you had planted the seeds in your son's head and when he got a PS5 instead of a car he lost his mind. You need to prepare yourself for the breakdown of not only your son and your husband's relationship with him but your own relationship with your son in the process. Not to mention the fact that this could lead to the breakdown and the destruction of your own marriage to say the least
Honestly as a gamer I would be thrilled to get a PS5 considering how hard they are to come by. A car would be more expensive but a PS5 was either super expensive(seen them going for $1000+) or he had to do some real digging to get one. A lot of people had to sign up for specific email lists to even have a chance to purchase one within a small window of time.
@@fluidwolf oh yeah trust me I was one of them and I can definitely relate to PS5.
first story are people serious? They expect op to let the step daughter put old pictures of her "happy family" all around his house to remind him of his wife's ex? Would they be ok if it happened to them? The step daughter could've put it up in her bedroom but no, she had to display it all around the house and make op feel unwelcome in his own home. What's all this bs about excusing a child for bad behaviour just because they're a child. She was constantly rude to him and taunted him about it and I think op's reaction is reasonable. So what, op needs to be the adult in the relationship by allowing her to just do whatever she wants in the house that he also lives in? What next? If she decides to put a large picture of her "parents" in the living room as the centre piece is op also expected to act the adult and allow it? If she takes pictures of op and her mother down and only display "her parents" pictures in the house where guests could see is op supposed to allow it too? Where does this end?
On Story number one the teenager is doing it on PURPOSE to push and push and push him away further and further. She doesn't understand why her parents broke up in the 1st place. I could be wrong, but I think she thinks if this guy wasn't around my mom and dad can get back together. Mom NEEEDS to have a series conversation about why her and dad split up so she can see the truth.
'Bingo. Stepdaughter has convinced herself that if she can just get rid of her stepfather, her parents will make up and get back together and she will have her old 'happy family' back. She's literally telling her stepfather 'I will start listening to you when you divorce my mom and leave us alone!' It's not OP's fault that his new wife and her ex didn't make it clear to daughter that their breakup is final and that they will never get back together. Helping their daughter to deal with their divorce is the parents responsibility.
Might be time to give Nancy what she wants...divorcing her mother.
XO, how come you don't have the text you've been using the past few days, with contrast? It's hard to read it.
He could have been petty about the happy family comment and said “must of not been so happy if she’s with me now”🤷
Honestly might get mommy dearest to curb her daughters bs
SD was setting OP up and he fell for it. She wanted to make him upset so they could have that fight over something "small" so she can cry to her grandparents and dad. OP should of ignored the pictures till the SD got bored of that plot
Wow the people on that first story. Usually redditors are ALL FOR "your house your rules" when it's dealing with In Laws but not a spiteful, bratty stepchild disrespecting him in his own house? He punished her for her attitude and that "idiot" comment.
In-Laws are adults who can live elsewhere. A stepchild is a *child* who has no choice where to live. Totally not equivalent at all.
With the last story, you're not in the wrong here but you need to prepare yourself for your wife to just apologize for the sake of keeping peace in the family. Your wife is all honesty is one of those people who has been so beaten down mentally and emotionally that I don't think people realize the severity of it. Think about it there's obvious unapologetic favoritism going on here and the fact that you're the first person in the family to call it out tells me that they know you're right they just aren't going to face it. My advice to you you and your wife need to go to counseling for her to move past this and also I strongly prepare yourself to basically go low contact with her side family because you're sister-in-law will do anything to make sure she's on top and your wife is below the bottom. In addition I strongly suggest that you make sure that your wife has limited contact with her side of the family because they will only beat her down so badly that it would make her question her sense of existence to begin with
I disagree with the people calling the first op the idiot. He is, but not alone.
The sister in the ipad story needs some serious therapy.
Why should Step-dad buy the stepson he meet as a late teen a car just because bio son got one... A console is a extremely generous gift, I would have expected a gift card or something like that. Mom should buy her son a car, it's her responsibility, how can't she see that, so idiotic.
I often wonder what these parents are thinking. Expecting a step parent to fork over $$$ for a stepchild. How about his dad and mom pay for the car?
Mostly NTA in story 1. She's being a brat n brats gets punished. The photos can stay in her room, that brat. Id he throwing them into her room
YTA for car story, but if he was 18 it would be different. As then it would be different treatment of kids. Or is the stepdad idk not another parent raising the stepson? All 3 should be buying the car
Call a cop for ipad one
Lol, like I'm gonna let some brat do whatever she wants In my house.
First story u don’t put up pictures of u, dad & mom around your stepdads house. That’s disrespectful. Keep them in your room. Now I had a situation of pictures with my ex & deceased baby girl. They were oil paintings taken 2 weeks before she died. I had them n my livingroom my apartment. Well my 2nd husband said he had no problem with them but when I moved n his house he suddenly had a problem. I put them in my 2nd daughters room. The only reason I wanted them up was because of her.
Op, she doesn't need to come over until she can respect you in Your house. And let your wife know she can leave if it happens again. I am so tired of kids like this. Sounds like she never gave you a chance. And yes I do have experience with this subject over and over because of my mom.
But you know his wife is not going to do that there is a major part of this woman that has so much fear of losing her child that she's willing to basically be a doormat to her daughter taking out her anger and frustrations out on her husband. And if there was an affair going on between the mother and the original poster you better believe she's going to make his life a living hell for the next 2 years otherwise the mother is just basically letting him have it unless because she doesn't want to lose her daughter at 18 but she also doesn't want to lose her marriage. And to be honest I'm already getting the sense that if she loses her marriage she will blame her daughter and her daughter will go no contact with her at 18 that's what's going to happen
@@BIGEAGLEDUDE If it's his house, then if his wife wants to see the kid...she can go rent/buy a place to spend time with HER kid where HER kid can put up all of the pictures of her previous marriage that she wants to.
@@SnowyWolborg This. I also remember another story of a step daughter who accused her step father of sexual assault (her bio dad also egged her on to do this) which caused the step father to divorce the mom. It was revealed that the step daughter lied and the mother not once made the step daughter apologize for what she did. It was awful.
I'm just trying to figure out where all these commenters are getting that OP never liked the daughter and never made her feel welcome? Where does it say that? Did I miss something?
And no matter if there was an affair or not, the daughter will always view OP as the person who "broke up her family" just for simply being married to her mother.
@@SnowyWolborg I think you're absolutely right. Most definitely plenty of projection going on. But that's the norm for most of these commenters on Reddit.
Regarding 2:19
Spoiler alert, the house is NOT the child's property. Allowing the child to be disrespectful is the child choosing to leave. If the fem parental figure objects, it can go too. O.P.'s house, O.P.'s rules. Don't like it? Go somewhere else to live.
Simple.
👍
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 facts. What is wrong with people?
You need a better picture to superimpose the text of the stories. It's next to impossible to read them. I mute the videos so I can read at my pace (which is faster than you reading/voicing the video. Please do better so the text can be seen more easily. Thanks.
Story 1: It’s hard to say absolutely if you’re the ahole without knowing the full story because it sounds like whatever beef you and your stepdaughter have, has been ongoing awhile. However, it’s a a bit tyrannical of you to deny her pics of her past. Even IF you have issues with her spreading them around the house for what it seems you believe was just to annoy or antagonize you, you could and should have compromised and let her at least keep them displayed in her room.
Story 2: Stop right there!! I think your missing something. You said EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY for the older brother? Why would you or ANYONE expect a sixteen year old would get the same gift? It might be different treatment IF it was both their 18th birthday but it’s not. 18 is a much different more responsible mature milestone than 16. So YTA.
(Besides a console is a great gift and depending on the car and number of included games and accessories, it might be just as expensive.)
If she wants to hang those photo's in her room, that's fine. But she doesn't get to spread pics of her past and her 'happy family' thoughtout the whole house against OP's wishes. That's so disrespectful. SD may live there, but it's not HER house. It's OP's house.
@@LKLG1990 umm I’m not sure if your comment is meant to disagree with mine or not but I actually said the same thing, which is basically if stepdad tries to apply a ban to her room, he might be the ahole because while forcing her choices on the whole house is overstepping, decorating her own room is not. That may not have been crystal clear but that’s what my previous post said. Again though I’m not sure if you agreeing with me or disagreeing and making points against my post as I can’t tell from the content. Apologies if I made a mistake or offended.
Story 2: OP is literally the primary cause of the problem she is complaining about.
7:15)Looks like Da Mutter got a locksmith. Does the IPad have a location beacon?
Good afternoon XOS. Thanks for the stories. Have a great day
Two years of putting up with stepdaughter disrespectful to you in your home ? Two Years ?
@@thegayestgoth Please tell me where you're getting the infidelity from?
They're assuming this based on the daughter's comment that OP " broke up their family". Whether there was an affair or not, the daughter will always see OP as the person who "broke up her family" simply because he's married to her mother.
Last OP is A GOSH DARN KING.
His attitude? Are you fucking serious, wow, he is the home owner and she did this only to hurt him? Just because her parents fucked up she doesn't get to take it out on him, being a stroppy teen is no excuse to be downright nasty to the guy
That's the point. She was lookin for, no NEEDED a scapegoat to blame for her parents divorce, someone to take it out on. And OP is/was an easy target. But no, OP is just supposed to take it and let it happen? He's just supposed to let SD act that way without consequences? I call BS.
Why are people so Ridiculous in their thinking, She's a Child that can call Him an Idiot but should get away with BAD BEHAVIOUR that was Deliberate.
Info Alert!!? SHE is very, very AWARE of the impact of Her Behaviour and so kept it Up for Maximum Impact.
This is the reason why so many entitled people and Karens are running around the world. I'm with OP, I refuse to have my place of peace violated by anyone. If that teenager hates it there, she can leave. If her mom is offended, she can leave too until everyone learns to behave apprpriately
lol i swear to god so many of these reddit stories have female antagonizers literally crying their eyes out when someone...anyone...calls them out on their bullshit. It is hilarious.
@@SnowyWolborgfunny thing, that girl posted her side and everyone called her on her shit. Funny how that goes SMH 🤦♂️
For the first story: I'm not gonna say YTA or NTA because idk if the house was OPs or both sides of the stories. But I think the daughter needs some therapy because it sounds like she has some issues. And it might sound like from when she said "you ruined this family" that the mom had an affair with OP and that's effecting her majorly, and her mom is trying to play happy family like everything is fine, tbh I wouldn't be surprised if she moved in with dad or grandparents and went no contact with them.
Story 1: YTA/ESH, her attitude sucks (unless your relationship is the result of an affair)..... But your "my house" comments are also stupid, your married it is the marital house and she lives there. And yes her putting pictures with her dad around the house is also AHish. The best thing to do is get into therapy (both you and her).
Story 2: YTA, you never promise that someone else will buy them a particular gift for your son.... On top of that your son turned 16 not 18.
I can tell you how she broke into the safe. Depending if it's an electronic lock you are supposed to input your own personal code instead of the one it comes with. Most safe manufacturers have their base codes online or can be requested online. Always rekey a safe or strong box once you get it home.
story 1: how is OP TA for setting a clear boundary about not wanting photos of his wife's EX in the common areas of HIS home? she can keep them in HER room, not the bloody kitchen or living room. seriously what the hell is wrong with people? also, it takes 2 to cheat and her mom is just as guilty. if not more so, for the situation. this is how i always view the married partner in an affair.
story 2: I don't think the kid was TA, he was disappointed (thanks to his mom) and removed himself from the area instead of throwing a tantrum in front of everyone. I think that shows some maturity on his part.
Call me kooky, but I think the issue in the first story is less with the pictures themselves, and more with the way the step daughter keeps insisting that they're some kind of proof that his wife's failed marriage was happy, and could be that way again if OP wasn't there.
I agree with the nta on story 1 and feel the only reason people are saying yta is because of the fact he was an affair partner. I detest cheaters however it is not relevant to the story and doesn't affect my judgement
[Edit] so apparently there wasn't even cheating involved which makes it even more of a nta for me
Stir 1: NTA don’t get upset instead be petty and take out the frustration by getting loud in the bedroom with her mother. Give her mother so much love and attention it pisses off step daughter to no end.
Story 2: screw you OP
@@thegayestgoth Can you point out to me the part that says there was infidelity, please?
@@thegayestgoth "you need to be hanged", and you need to grown tf up already and get a dose of reality instead of putting make believe words in someone else's mouth. nowhere does it even mention infidelity. yeah, and this "kid" isn't a kid no more and is 2 years away from being an adult lol. not to mention, she already knows what she's doing. and if you're going to talk about abus then point out what she's doing as well bc then you're just another enabler
How did the sister Get into a Safe???
If I was op I would divorce this lady and her spoil brat and find someone who has well behave daughter
He's the one that chose to sleep with a married woman Is grown up to deal with the consequences. All we have is the daughter screaming you ruined my family and then OP refusing to give us any information about that. Which is Sus lol
Does she have a room at your house, if so pictures there is good. Not in common areas.
OP NTA I also don't feel bad for abby and she sounds like one of those people who need to go to drink and cause all types of problems, rumors, others drama scenes and thing to get attention and to ruin your wedding. Am a little worried she might get alcohol poisoning if she keeps drinking. Make sure a security person is there to kick her out if she tries to come to the wedding or reception.
For the story about the step daughter and the photos, NTA. I hate the whole "but she is a kid" excuse for shitty behavior. All the comments saying it is her home are not wrong but it is also OPs. If he doesn't want photos of his wifes ex all over his house, that is his roght. She can keep those photos in her room. And unless her Mom cheated on her Dad with OP, the step daughter needs to quit being a brat and needs to go to therapy.
Thank you for the background videos. I missed all these places. 😬
Just wow, so it is ok to be disrespectful to your step parent . This is why so many kids are out of control and have no respect. She needs to get a grip
That sister is a klepto and needs serious therapy for it, she admitted that she can't help it so hopefully the mom finally does right by sending her to get help. It'll only get worse as she gets older and if she steals from a store then she could go to jail...
Story 2 YTA, did you honestly think that a step parent would make such a huge purchase without consulting you? No one in their right mind would buy a car for a child without consulting the parents
Story 3: NTA. Hun I’m not going to lie. I would have jumped my Sister if that had happened. Your Parents need to do more than just take her party money away. But unfortunately your Mom is going to insist that much is unfair.
No,the guy with the step daughter is not the a! It's his fkn house!!!
"But she lives there too!"
Yeah, she can decide on the decor for places outside her room when she starts paying the bills.
Woah, infidelity is none of the stepdaughter's business?! Lol
Really crappy to have white lettering on a mostly white background. Bad Form. Have no idea what went on but for a few sentences.
Three guesses who the Mons favorite child is in the IPad story. And the first 2 font count
I listen all the time. But these are absolutely horrendous backgrounds. You can barely read the text. Sorry for bad feedback.
Story 1: Did the wife and daughter move into OP’s house? If yes, then it’s his house, his rules and he should expect respect from the stepdaughter - assuming that he does something to earn it and is not in the habit of taking stepdaughter’s electronics every five minutes for the slightest little thing!
Also, 16 is old enough to know what she is doing. If she keep it in her room it would be OK but putting it all around the house is not. Op may not have handled it the best way but, does anyone would feel OK having photos of their partner ex's around the house? Of course not. It's weird to have photos of exes around the house and disrespectful of the current partner.
Missing my former home, looking at the scenes in this video!
She can keep photos of her family in her room!!!! I have been there myself and the child is OUT OF LINE!!!!!
I can't believe the redditor who said it's not a kids business how their parent got with their step parent. What a crock of crap! It IS a kid's business if someone screws over their parent with infidelity. Don't like being held accountable for being a cheating turd? Then dont do it, simple as that!
16 is not a child
Teen disrespects and antagonizes OP on a daily basis.
Reddit calls the victim the idiot. The place is overrun with geniuses.
Reddit is overrun with disrespectful teens
You know I always hate hearing: “They’re kids, they don’t know better” I was once a teenager and I NEVER disrespected elders, nor did I ever have to use: but I’m a kid excuse. Teenagers know the difference of right and wrong, I knew if I did something bad then I would sooner or later meet the consequences, but then again I was raised by a good family with good morals.
Why do parents/step-parents think they can control their kids saying it’s ‘their home’ ???
1)They are a child living there, it’s their home as much as it is yours.
2) It definitely is her moms home too, she belongs there and you don’t get to parent her child
did you miss the part where she constantly called him an idiot and was placing pictures of her "happy family" all around the house that he's living in? She didn't put it in her room, she put it in public areas where guests can see with the express purpose of making him feel uncomfortable in his own home. Yah he doesn't get to parent a step child but he's also not obligated to put up with her bs. Also, if he can't parent her then her and her mum should pay for her share of the rent, utilities, groceries. you don't get free boarding, free food, internet, electricity and go harass the bill payer. The SD needs to learn some gratitude or go try that stunt at her dad's house.