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Sir ji I m government employee I m very coward I give to my parents 80% of my salary from 2018 @ the date of joining...Sir ji Me and my wife argument / fight on this in past I had 1 daughter and I m stop for children but my mother says 1 beta hona chahiye but God gives me 2 cute twins daughters last year sir ji andar se kuch samajh me nahi aata ki paap karu ya punya 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️
Every child has a responsibility towards their parents. Taking responsibility for parents' food, clothing, social protection of parents, health, giving parents a good life etc. "The son will become a big officer and drive around, and the parents will use buses, trams or rickshaws to go somewhere" because they don't have the ability to drive, is that what you mean? Do you mean "son will wear expensive clothes, shoes, father will wear slippers, pajama because father is not qualified to wear expensive clothes", oh parents have dedicated their lives to make you the best. "A poor parent taught his child to study, and that child did not see his parents, the son lived a beautiful life in a beautiful mansion like a rich man, and the poor parents remained poor in a tiled rice house. Because his parents did not deserve to live in a big mansion." . Is it what you call Indian society to be? More than 50% Indian society is still poor or lower class, but 90 % of them have Smartphone, 4g and 5g internet , Have you ever wondered what message will go to them? Shame on you, 🤬🤬🤬 I think 🤔you are a test tube baby 😅😅😅😅😅 that's why you can't understand the relationship between parents and their children , and you never understand the Blood strain or blood relation between parents and children.
Sir I kept on giving money to my in laws unlimited. The moment I used to stop giving they used to throw me and kids out of the house. An spread news and say bahu karti hai kalesh. Socially all rumors. My mistake I got married in 1st Gen educated and were financially lower class family who was my spouse. Like you say rather got to say coming from a upper middle class family this was a blunder.
I want to add a little point here by giving a real example. My friend got a decent job in central government in West Bengal ( native Odisha). His salary was nearly ₹55,000/- per month. He never sent any money to his home because his family was rich enough. In course of time he accumulated a good sum of money. But the only mistake he did was he lent the money to his "local" friends in West Bengal with whom he used to play cricket in holidays. When he asked for his money, they delayed it for one year. After that when he asked money seriously, he went missing on that evening and his decomposed dead body was found hanging in neraby tower. I just want to say that parents should atleast know when and where their child is spending the money until he gets married .
Your friend is an adult and should know what is correct and what is wrong.If he took the decision to give money to friends then he should also take decision on how to wisely handle the decision. Don't expect parents to babysit a man baby.
Parents ko flawless dikhaaya Gaya hai Hamaare culture mein. People forget that parents are humans with flaws. And every individual has been put on this earth to survive and in a good way. Dusrin ke liye karna hai to sant ban jao. Kisi ne nahin Roka.
I feel wise parents will never burden their children by asking for money unnecessarily and they will plan their retirement well. And wise children will always try to support and make their parents lives better (if they are in a better condition themselves). Because it's not about money, it's about the intentions. Giving happiness and comforts to parents bcoz they have been really understanding towards them and raised children with wisdom.
You are absolutely right Sir, 12 year back my parent's did the samething , my younger brother has given money to my father, he has purchased plot on sister's name , now he is no more and sister need equal right in father's property and deny to sign on NOC, now she has more property then my brother , relation is too bad among us. Mother is supporting Sister. Ye sab raita parents ka failaya hua hai. Pehle unequality ki ek ko diya dusre ko nahi phir ab jo bacha hai usme bhi chayiye. Better club all asset and divide equally.
Marvelous Content!! My parents have ripped me for show-off. Till I realized the back story, it was too late. Lost all relationships and am struggling broke!!
Your best video ever. This thing has happened with me. When I got my first govt service, my father started taking 20% - 30% of my income as his spending, that too for unaccountable reasons. So after giving him around 2.5L in 2 years of time, i gathered courage and started asking for the reasons. Then he started shouting at me, and due to this our relation had touched the bottom. Then I took a step ahead and called him to live with me so that spends become less. Now everything has started going to be good. But Amitji, your words in this video are true and absolutely reasonable. Thanks.
Maine apni ankho k samne dekha ki ek maa ne apne bete ko ye tak ginwa diya ki maine tera jab accident ho gya tha to 8 lakh lgaye ye kiya wo kiya....i was surprised to listen this.... baki ye to normal hi h north india me तू इतना बड़ा ऐसे ही हो गया, हमने तुझे पैदा किया and frustration itni hoti h bachhe ko ki isse achha to mat hi krte paida... palne ka b ehsan gate h maa bap, har din sun sun k bcahha पक jata h. It is highly logical n sensible❤ आप समाज के नाड़ी वैध हो। एकदम सटीक बताते हो सब।
His ability kitab karte hain aur agar lene ke time mehnge, branded saman chahiye aur Dene ke naam per purni, satin, unke pass useless pade hue bekar saman dekar apnapan dikhane ki koshishkarte hain.
Maine 2022 me may me 45000/- diya alag rehte hue. June me 15000/- uske baad october se fixed 55000/- ab tak continue hai And july me meri surgery hui, 2022 se aaj tak ginwate hain ki teri surgery me 30000/- lagaye the. Ye vo aaj tak main sunta hu.
Truely 100% practical and unbiased approach. In Maharashtra we read "manache shlok" by Ramdas Swami which says "nako re mana dravya te pudhilanche" means dont expect money/property from next generation and old generation. Yes we should expect love/care from old and coming generation in return of love/ care from them. Truely eye opener for old age society. Sidhi baat no bakwas
My mom took away even last penny from my salary while marrying me off.. though my parents are financially strong and as such there was no short of money .. her words were "i gave my salary for my wedding and thats how it is done... you also have to do the same" I had no say on how my salary was spend on my wedding... 😢 I will never pass such a trauma n pain to my daughters... Wish this video was made earlier
😕. God bless you child , keep going 👍💕. The contribution will come back to you in ways you cannot imagine 🙏 Sometimes parents think they r doing good.Time will only say .Don't loose hope , remember parents had to make a lot of compromises to keep the pot boiling .Give her the benifit of doubt .🙏❤️
Don't aliniate from your parents .Be on their side , try to understand them . Time will only say things , they have their reasons for so doing .The main thing is if they r really concerned about your well-being. I don't know if you r their only child or you have a brother .If you have tell them from now about how they r thinking about their property dispersal after them . If they have thought nothing about you tell them they had no right to use your money in your marriage so now they have to think also about you .Then keep distance from them ..🙏💕
At least your parents married you off . My parents were enjoying the money of my sisters. I was posted out of my state. Since they were pensioners they hardly needed money I didnt send them the money. But my sisters were literally spending on all the upkeep and the parents couldn't leave the lifestyle they were enjoying. So they either made no effort or stalled their marriage. Ultimately they searched for their own match and got married. Parents didn't spend a dime. After I was posted back. They tried doing the same for me but I don't give I dime. So they are now trying to manipulate by showing the property lollypop. But this doesn't work on me , but my sisters are still crackheads. No amount of explaining works.
Excellent Sangwanji. I recently discovered your videos and I found them extremely honest. You are the one holding a mirror towards the society and showing them their true faces which obviously people don't want to see. I can vouch for this video because I myself witnessed this in my own family as well as my relative's families. I have gone thru enough pain in my life due to parents expectations. My mistake was that I kept giving the money for initial few years when I started job and wasn't saving anything for myself. And then a couple of friends have imparted some sense into me and I started saving for myself, so I started asking for the purpose when parents asked for money and I only gave what I found genuine and reasonable. I also took the medical insurance for both my parents..but just because I started discussing and openly questioning them about the purpose of asking money, my equation with them was suddenly changed. I, who was the best child became the bad one. So this is the reality of life , thanks for showing this up. I am now living my life on my own terms but it's not a very happy one because I don't share a good relationship with them anymore. 😢 My younger brother who was a student that time and I contributed a big time so that he could finish his studies but he doesn't even know who gave that money for his course because it was between myself and parents. Eventually, parents now only love him and his kids, I am more of an outsider.
Very good content We r facing this situation from 40 years वो कहते हैं कि चाहे चोरी कर के दो लेकिन हमें तो चाहिए ही चाहिए , क्योंकि हमने तुम्हें पैदा किया है He has good pension , retired from a guzeted post हमने उनसे कुछ नहीं लिया है , We make house by ourselves He has a narcissistic personality
When I got married, we lived with my in-laws, so actually divided the monthly expense and used to give our share to my in-laws. When we moved out of their house due to our jobs, neither they asked not we gave. As you said, we had taken medical insurance for them. When we went abroad for higher education, we did all the expenses without expecting any help from them. Now that we are doing good financially and being mother of growing son, I am clear that he would live separate after his marriage, this situation would never arise. Still thank you for sharing your knowledge.
Soo logical. I am the Parent of two kids. And totally agree with you. In future I will not becoming the bank. I will give a safe and free environment to both. Thank you for the clarity.
आपको ये वीडियो 10 साल पहले बनाना था। कुछ माता-पिता ऐसे भी होते हैं जो पेंशन पर अच्छी लाइफ जी होते हैं, फिर भी आवारा बच्चों के लिए जान देते हैं और जो बच्चा लाइफ में अच्छा कर रहा होता है उसके ही जीवन में कलेश करते हैं।
Ekdum sahe ek ludke par sub luta dete hai beti par aur jo sedua sadha beta humesa help karta hai humesa help karta hai ysko ghar ka kuttta samujj lete hai aur ha baar baar lecture dete hai bhedvhaaw karenge aur jo aacha ludka rahega usko kabhi help naye karenge aur ye bahu aur uske buccho me bhi karenge aisa khub ek ludka pura burbaae karta hai enka paisa aur aur baadme bure waqt me jo beto ko inhone pucha nahe usi ko help karne aur pura ghsr lekar chalne ke baat karte hai
Sir aapne jo jo bola hamare life mein bilkul wahi fit baith raha hai... Kal hi mai aur meri wife yeh sab baatein discuss kar rahe thhe aur aaj aapne clear keh diya. Thankyou very much sir to help us be free from any so called guilt imposed by the society.
I fully agree with this and idea of giving medical insurance premium is superb. Sir, I request your video on one important topic. Husbands sometimes get exploited by wife....he is supposed to spend all salary for family but wife spends more for herself like on parties, trips and parlour. She should be equally reaponsible to run the family.
Sir your content is amazing... today our generation is suffering coz parents act more of a bank than being a parent! Hope your video gets viral and many understand working towards clarity. We have to break this cycle! Not only sons but daughters are also treated badly and in a biased way too. Hats off to you for the clarity!
Never thought I would hear this bitter truth. There is a shloka in Durga Saptashati which underlines this very selfishness of human beings. I also believe in this. I give analogy of birds who take care of their yong ones until they learn to fly and leave the nest to make their own. We humans should learn from them
I have suffered all my life because of this habit of my husband…he was a gazettd officer but I lived hand to mouth..in-laws gave that money to their Daughter..I wish this video was there 40 years ago
My father is retired gazetted officer and he's always asking for money everytime. I know of this habit and fortunately my salary when I started working wasn't enough for me so I couldn't give him anything. And when I started making some decent amount I questioned him how he spent his pension. He doesn't tell me anything. At the time of his retirement he hardly had anything in his account even though he didn't spend much on us when we were students. But his savings have become 4 times our entire saving and investments. Because he didn't spend a dime the day we started working. Not even on the children's marriages.
My parents became the bank since the time i went to college. And till today. I have told this exact argument with my parents. In return i got the answer that forever you have to repay. They will not put any figure bcz their want of return is unlimited. They will never ever understand. The argument reduced only after i started emotionally becoming distant from them. One instance also my mother asked me to gift a 20 k shoes. I gifted it. A few days later in an argument my mom exclaims that why do u think i asked u to gift ur dad that shoes, i was like why? And the answer just made me crumble into my bed literally.... As she said that in return of the gift i am going to get my father's ashirwaad. I thought parents blesssed us irrespective of gender, intelligence, or looks. But now i know that intellectual ability pe toh bachoan se hi inke blessings biased he, saath hi looks se bhi baised he, gender se toh sabko patah hi he kitna bais he ab paiso se bhi ashirwaad kharidne ke riwaaz chaalu ho gaye hen. Jis tarah mandiron mein business chalte he bhagwaan aur bhakton k beech ussi tarah ab parents bhi investment bankers ban rahe bache paida karke.
Bhaisaab…20K k shoes kaun pehen raha? Aapne kabhi Bhagwan ko kabhi itne mehenge joote chadaye hote toh shayad bada ashirwaad mil bhi jata😂 just Kidding…aap demand sunke hi mana kar dena chahiye tha…demands ki koi logical limit hoti hai bhai…
अरे सर हमने ऐसा देखा है कि माँ बाप बेटे के जीवन की सारी खुशियाँ खा गए। बेटे बहू को बसने ही नहीँ दिया ।इतना कंट्रोल किया। पर यह भी सच है कि सभी माता पिता ऐसे नहीं होते। बहुत से माता पिता अपनी ही संतानो पर सब लुटा कर भी अन्तिम समय में उनकी अवहेलना झेलते हैं।
Your parents are not your emergency money, your children are not your retirement fund. Build your own wealth. Unfortunately our previous generation was not familiar with this gyan. So, we have to support them. But, we should not expect the same from the next generation.
Correct Sir....I am a parent my kids are young but I have no expectation from them I only pray for my child to be happy successful n healthy ....very true what we are doing is our duty our responsibility so we should not do it thinking about the return let them live their life wisely n happily
I faced the same situation. I buy groceries, pay bills , bought health insurance, still my mother ask for money and always compares me with my cousin telling like my cousins give x amount to their parents. My main regret is I revealed my salary to my parents and now they are like itna jyada kamate h itna bhi Nehi de sakta. Thanks for putting this issue into light. The life of a guy is very hard jitna bhi Karo last me sunne ko milte h Tune hamare liye kya kiya😢😢
My father in law left 6 crore of loan We are repaying till now...still no respect....but i always sayto my husband we will never give one rupee loan to our children and ruin their life
My husband gave their 8 year income to their family before marriage, after marriage we faced so many financial problems but parents ab bhi happy nhi h😢
Very good video sir, i as a parent do not expect anything from my children once they become financially independent. I believe that we should save enough for our old age so that as parents we dont have to ask our children for money and they can live their own life on their own terms, burdenless..and if they want to give it should be from their own free will and not forced.
For the first time i have seen someone say "Parents ka pyar kabhi pure ho hi nahi sakta". Its quite logical! Kids are innocent and pure when young and that is why only the kid could love the parent in this relationship.
You're very fortunate and may god bless your for carrying such a positive message. But there are unfortunate people who are exploited emotionally, financially and socially. I hope everyone gets parents like you.
if parents hv not planned their retirement, mediclaime, upto how much should pay for their treatments esoecially after 75- 80 yrs. plz make videi, I hv seen so many people taking loan n crying bcz of it. Thank you.
Absolutely 💯 i believe the same. Until its not needed genuinely,why to ask money from children? Me as a mother will always wish to give love, support n whatever they need to my children
Sir everything you explained in your talk is reality,I am agree with you 100% . It’s parents job to raise their children and provide the best they can until their children are independent and on their feet. It’s not children’s responsibility/duty to pay back or be financially responsible for the parents. Children have their own responsibilities and needs in their lives. And when they get married, they will have the same responsibilities as the parents had once. So it’s a circle, let it move smoothly. We are in late sixties Totally independent by the Grace of God! And so proud of ourselves.
Lol, my husband funded 50% of a flat my mother in law bought on her name saying she will gift him on his wedding, now she refuses to transfer the flat on his name not even 50% of it, she says mere bad sab tumhara hai, he has 2 sisters also there's no will & they are so ready to ask for their share... At the time he was buying it i wasn't married to him but i kinda indirectly told him not to do this but indian society me aisi bat karne wali bahu chudail aur ghar todne wali hoti hai now he's seen the reality, anyway i am kinda happy atleast real faces to samne aae uske.
Same problem everywhere... My sister's mother-in-law always threatens my sister that she will divide the property equally between her 4 kids ( 1 son, 3 daughters)...
@@Crispr_cas9th see i don't have a problem with that it's their property they can divide in all children or even give it to anyone it's their hard work so we don't have any right to ask but where my husband's invested his money that should be given to him... That's all.
@@malvikamishra9545 no.. The problem here is that all her daughters keep visiting my sister's home and stay for 15-20 days.. And don't help my sister at all...Even when all of them are married they keep on asking for money and stuff... They interfere too much... If they want their share, they should take it and settle the matter permanently instead of creating nuisances.. And also if people have intentions to divide the property then they should not lie at the time of marriage that everything belongs to our son and take huge dowry... Its kind of a scam that u take dowry according to ur property and then after marriage u distribute it to everyone...
@malvikamishra9545, your husband 50% will also divide all his siblings. Pls don't mind, this will happen. So better keep yourself away to avoid any future losses.
Apke husband ka koi right nhi hai because marriage se pehle mother ko gift kiya hai. Ab ye mother ka right hai, wo kisko bhi de. Maine khud 7 years ki salary parents ko di hai aur ek built house bhi.
I can recall discussing the same things with my husband 6 years back sitting in a crowded park and speaking slowly to avoid anybody hearing it as such things are not accepted by society. That time I myself was not sure whether I am thinking right but with time and maturity, I was able to evaluate my thoughts and started having a strong conviction in them. Thanks for sharing such useful content and coming from an experienced professional, it really means a lot.
😊i am exactly with this thought. Not taking money from children though they are quite capable. When people say that you have successfull children so you may get financial support. My husband is no more and i was housewife officially still i want to remain financially independent and self sufficient. I don’t want to bother my children as I believe that they worked hard for their's success. I was only service provider. I bless them for their success ahead.
Brilliant msg.... I was also of the thought that child should give money to their parents.... bt izzat ?????..... ab bahut achi clarity mil gayi... unhe ek achi education diya taki wo apni life jee sake.... ab jo money humare pass hai agle jitne saal hai wo khud ke lifestyle n health wellness pe kharche....❤❤❤❤
Sir,,parents jab job mei the toh unki salary 900/- (1980s) hoti thi..aaj inflation has lead to change in this dynamic..and salary is 50000/-..they are in the impression ki humaare kharche hundreds mei hai aur kamaai thousands mei...and trust me this backfires big time..specially if you are a girl and helped parents create assets and now you cannot use them..BECAUSE YOU ARE A GIRL.!!
You won't be allowed to use the assets You helped create. I helped my father to buy real estate by giving nearly 50 percent share many times in my fathers name. I heard talks to the entire property being passed on to my brother and his wife for more than a decade now. Had lots of heartburn but have been talking to him and reminding him of my contributions which were never returned. Now, he has agreed to give me a small share
One day one colleague seems depressed so I asked him what happened, he told me he took & used all 5-6 years of saving to build house in home town now his father want to give 50% shares of house to his daughter also
Many present day parents are using hardened money of IT emplyoed Son's in a very very Laxuarly way. This poor bachuars sending without questoing. A good advice for all. Thank you sir.
First of all, thank you from the bottom of my heart for bringing up this topic. Nobody I say nobody in India talks about these sensitive topics. They are like 'forgive your parents and all'. My father told me once 'I have spent 3 lakh almost to raise a kid like you'. I told him 'Who asked you to have me in the first place? You should have thought before marriage if you even want kids or not '. He came to beat me. My father is one of those who purposely badmouths about his daughter in the society. Mere father sabko bolte phire ki I don't give him money. Mother bhi waisi hai. I don't have any respect left for them. They only talk to me because they need money. Main jitna na burden bani unpe, woh mere pe burden baan e rahe aur aaj bhi hai.
Girl my sympathies for u. Create ur future with ur husband n kids as u r already financially independent n don't waste ur life thinking ur parents thinking will change. Wishing u happiness in life.❤
@@informative_.y5xqfir ye kee do.... Jaisi soch vala admi aaya ...isey to video vale sir se problem hogi .... Ye nirupa roy k drame me hi maraa ja raha
very well said!! Respect to u sir...I would like to share my story, my mother asked money for taking care of me and my babies till they were 3 years old and Now I have lost respect for her. Its not about money if she would have asked nicely but she demanded like she had done a favour. I have spent a lot of husband's money on her needs from last 16 years, paying for my brother's cancer treatment, his alcohol rehab and his depression treatment. I m tired of all that...Now I know she is surely a selfish women who doesnt care about me but only her son.
yes , mothers and daughters feed on each others toxicity. Daughters are gullible and mothers easily exploit them. It is usually very late the daughters realize this and lot of damage is already done by then.
Yes, you should give money to parents if they really need it and are financially not secure. But I thinks it's the parent's responsibly also to have a comfortable retirement saving and lead by example for their children & not depend on them. There are cases where parents invest their whole life saving to get their children a fancy abroad education. In such cases, it's the children's responsibility to help their parents financially once they start earning. It's the youths responsibility to ensure their parents don't lose their wealth in getting them an education. And if that is the only way, they must take responsibility for that and share the financial burden with their parents once they start earning.
Yeh budda chutia bana raha hai.. iske chaaker mai aapne parents se muh mat modna... they are the one who will stand with you in your worst time..... there is a world above money...
Sir, you are encouraging earning youth for questioning parents & to heart them. Now a days how many children's are obedient and careful of parents ? This lesson is addition to them. Thank u & be careful about yourself in future, never knows.
Very nice advice. Many parents need this advice because they exploits their children throughout their life and they don't understand that they're exploiting their children.
Bhai waah!!! I am impressed because I have been there, done that, and now I resent my parents. I learnt the hard way that Adharmi ke saath Dharm nahi nibhaate. Kyunki unko oongli dete hai toh woh galaa pakad lete hai. I almost always never comment on social media, but Uncle, please accept my appreciation. Great job!
Sir meri saas meri shadi ke baad muje sunati thi ki me tumhare pati ki padhai ke liye apna FD tor di thi. Mere papa ne khafi dahej diya tha fir bhi muje sunati thi.😂 muje lagta tha jaise vo apna beta nhi padha rahi mere pati ko padha rahi thi. UP me jab ladke wale aate h arrange marriage karne to bolte h ki hamne apne bete ki padhai me itna lagaya h to itna dahej to milna hi chachiye. Raj to apki beti hi karegi 😂😂. UP ki saaso ko apni bahuo ka raj karne ka bahut dukh rahta h. 😂😂. Mere pati to apne maa baap ka kraj utarne ke liye apne chote bhai ka kharcha pure 11 saal uthae taki vo IAS ya PCS ban jaye lekin jab hame apni beti ko foreign bhejna tha to koi udhar bhi money nhi diya. Upar se mere husband ke bhai ne unpar aarop lagaya ki vo LIC ki kist bar rahe the kya jo ab paisa maang rahe h. Sab logo se anurodh h ki jinke maa baap bacho ki line laga kar apne bade beto per apne chote baccho ki jimedari daal dete h vo jimmedari mat uthaye. Vohi chota bhai kal ko aaka sabsa bada dusman ban jayega
I agree with you , some parents think that children cannot handle money and they want to invest or spend their way. Now-a- days children also pressurise parents to finance their studies abroad with their savings. I have seen many cases where parets spend all the money and end up spending miserable life because children dont repay them.
Excellent video sir! I agree with every word you said. One should help parents when there is emergency, take out health insurance for parents but paying monthly emi is very expensive for couples with kids. For our parents in Mumbai the expenses are so high, paying 15-20k a month for both parents and in-laws is like paying to bank :) . It is very sensitive subject, most will disagree with you due to their emotions/love for parents. But truth is always bitter and mindset change is a must. Unless you know someday that money will return in some form, one should count and contribute for emergency or basic necessities. Anything beyond that make no sense. Also we have to prepare for our own emergencies , care for kids and retirement fund as no one is going to help us during our old age. Paying this monthly undisclosed emi is an unfortunate monthly stress to finances.
Parents should have helped their children only in emergency but not for regular expensive education and expensive demands of their children by sacrificing their whole life.
@@sunnyghosh7371 I see you are blinded by the emotions. Also that you are assuming everyone receives expensive education and places expensive demands. There are majority of people (including me) who have studied in government schools in small town not in city and have paid our student loan to complete 3 years of higher studies. More importantly where you see sacrifice I see greed for emotional support/love to live happy life. Parents gave birth to a child to fulfil sense of belonging and have more people around them who can love them to feel secure. Life becomes boring after 40 age if you do not have children so having a child is like filling the emptiness (Greed) . The moment as a Parent you decide and give birth to a child, the responsibility is solely with Parents to take care of child and give basic necessities. Children have not taken birth to serve parents thats like giving birth to slavery. Parents control what you can give and what not. to children. infact also what they study /learn. In return they receive love, care, support, fun time from children. So please don't bring the word sacrifice , it is rather Parent's greed. This cycle continues and every Child becomes parent one day and follows the same.
You're doing a great work Sirji 🙏🏻 There is also a common trend among parents, they put money into our studies and expect us to choose the career of their choice. And they always choose the obvious "UPSC" and pressurise us to give exam amd waste our life in it's pursuit. I myself has WASTED many years of my precious youth due to my parents and family pressure to go for UPSC. Can you please make a video on this topic, addressing parents of this country: "की भैया अब सरकारी नौकरी का मोह त्यागो". Your previous videos has helped me a lot 🙏🏻. Please continue making more such videos on UPSC and Govt jobs. When such videos will go out in the public, someday our society will be free from the clutches of "Govt Jobs" and "Exam Culture". Thanks again Sirji 🙏🏻
You are a true legend Sir. It seems like you are saying what my heart always feels but kahin guilt me rehti thi k soch galat hai meri because society k norms se opposite soch hai. But your thoughts which are aligning with mine gave me the relief that yes its true and valid. I hope every parent gets the chance to listen to you. Thank you.
I am lucky to have found ur video Sir....I also deal with things differently and don't follow the tradition which is unnecessary and ur points match with mine exactly....I was about to take a wrong decision and then I found ur video and changed my decision and now I am really happy ...
Sir.. In South India.. Many parents don't want to get their working daughters married.. Because... They want total control... Of their daughters... Salary
👍🏻my straight answer - Bilkul Nahi dene chahiye. Unke paas already unki savings aur property hai. Youngsters ko apne paise apni "Wife" aur apne Future Plans ke liye sambhaal ke rakhne chahiye. Parents ne Youngsters ko bahut pareshaan kar ke rakha hai
Sahi bol rahe hai Parents don't trust kids but they are ready to take your salary and ask you. To trust them. They have Everything property, money and still they are insecure in trusting their kids U work in their house give time money and in return they say this is their house leave or stay as they like Better live on rent
I'm proud of parents they never asked me money till now and they work very hard in agriculture even though they don't need to work. Not everyone get parents like me
mai 19 ki age se job karna start kar di thi now 21 year old mai call centres mai kaam karti hu meri almost pura paisa ghr pe le lete hai or naahi meri study ke liye kuch karte mai chid ke apne gayi jagah job chodh di or har waqt mujhse paise mangte mere rakhe hue paise bhi mangte hai ab toh mere pass 500 bhi rehta hai toh usmai se bhi mangte hai mai tang aa chuki hu ekdum
I always give everything to my parents as they have gone through very tough time since my childhood but after few years I have observed that their expectations are increasing day by day 😮...and now I am feeling it is like burden for me I also don't find appreciation or satisfaction coz anything I do they became judgemental 😢...love between us vanished and there is only relation for money exists 😣
It’s very simple It’s your HARD WORK. Its YOUR MONEY it’s good to give but always keep a boundary You have a whole life to live and without learning money management you will not survive
My parents have not even asked for a single penny from me, they don't even know what my salary is. Even when I voluntarily gift something with my choice to them, they always feel bad that the gift is too expensive and money should not be wasted. 😅 They even ask me that if I need money, leave alone seeking any monetary help from me 😅
I think your idea to reform the Indian society toward the western way of life and thinking is great . The new generation of indians and the blame game parents /children you mentioned should smoothly disappear with assertiveness of the new generation. I feel sorry for these young couple living in very basic condition in Australia and still need to send money every month regardless they survive with their low pay wages otherwise they start getting txt message call from their elders regarding money.Your topic is very interesting.
Don't have much expectations. Just give 15k per month and that's all. Will keep it that way till it becomes 10% of my income. Currently it's 20%. Have medical insurance for them. But that's all. Nothing else. Needs and not wants.
This is exactly happened with me sirji. my parents kept on asking money 💰 🤑 and my father splurged and my mom gives people money on interest who don't pay her back. Basically they are using my hard earned money and wasting it and again they make faces that they are poor.
I think once u start earning comfortably, 1. Set aside a fixed percentage of your salary for your parents in case they require money (5/10/15/20% depending upon how much u earn) and pay them monthly, 2. Approval of your spouse is necessary for the same. 3. Take health insurance for parents (best investment) as health emergencies could cost you a fortune.
Spouse bhi bolegi ki mere bhi maa baap hai... Mai apna Paisa vha bhejungi. Then Husband ki permission bhi zaroori hai ? Kyuki Parents to dono ke hi hai... Farz to dono ka Banta hai. Simple way is.. Ladka apne parents ko apne hisab se de. Aur Ladki apne hisab se apne parents ko. Aur ek mutual understanding ho dono me is baat ko leke.
My brother's also gave money to my father when he is alive for spend extra expenditure and my father was a pensioner...😂😂but my father deposited all money to Rd and fd coz he knew kids may not saving...
Sir You are Doing what Gordan Ramsey is doing in USA...Your words are true and correct....I was looking for someone like him but talks as per Indian situation...I am Gratefull I saw your Channel...Thanks A Lot!!
Not even 24 hrs ago my mom told me that we spent so much on your education and you are still not earning. You shud get married because if you're a woman and youre not an IAS or a Doc/Engg then you're worthless in this society. Not a single man will marry you and me and your dad cant keep taking care of you financially forever. Its our money which we earned through hardwork. Marry any 'rickshawallah' you can find and get off our chests. The fact that you mention the gender lens parents wear when they look at their kids....its like.... it opened my brain like...what the hell, Ive never thot about it that way.
Technically they are not wrong, if you are 18+, also a graduate and still not making money then you are liability on society in long term. You can start thinking about becoming independent by earning money. If you can't do that you can find a guy who does that for you and get married.
Sir please make something for new parents. I am going to be a mother soon and sometimes I feel anxious by thinking about what kind of parent I'm going to be. I don't want to pass any trauma to my kids knowingly or unknowingly. I don't want them to feel the same things we face with our parents.
Life is ruined when husband gives money to his parents n his brothers n sisters, all life n all not satisfied n very bad bahu. This is our society. Parents are also like this want all money n yet not satisfied. Thanks for this topic.
I am 30. Married. My maama, mausi and all maternal side relatives ask money from my mother. I have 2 maama and 2 maami. Both couple (i.e all 4) have jobs. My mother is naive and always gives money. My masi also has a job, although the salary is not good just 30k a month at the age of 50. But they have house in Delhi. They have property in ancestral village also. But they don't manage money well. And when in need they ask us. Same with maama also. They recently bought a 8lk car whereas they could afford 4lk car. Now they ask us money. Me and my sister also wish to lead a lavish life. Go on foreign trips. But we save money. And when we say to our mother that we are planning to go for a trip. Then she lecture us about saving money. We can easily afford a couple of foreign trips, buy luxury items. But mom don't allow, not even with our own money. But she doesn't lecture her relatives. And our cousins enjoy a lot. They don't save money.
U r absolutely right, My inlaws also demand money, grocery, all the bills , cab bills, and all the demands of their 2 daughters from my husband whos is their only Son in the name of " their House will be given to the Son " which is not gurented coz all the life they want to give everything to their daughters. And my husband Give money to parents and his parents put money in the bank which they dnt even show, discussed or Spent on us and plus they are also having their income and pension also still they want everything from son coz he has brought his wife in their house . I am so helpless My opinion stands no where And saying such bold and eye-opening statements in India is Taboo😢. God bless to such sons who are working hard and Not saving any money for their wife and children. And giving everything to parents who inly want to fill their daughters demand.This generation Son's will not be having any pensions or Hospital free facility. Juss earning in lakhs and spending all. No retirement security.
Sir u r right. Mere saas sasur toh shadi ke baad hi bolne lage ki ab har mahine aadha kharcha dena padega. Hamse to 8 saal tak paise liye. Jab tak unke sath rahe. Par dusre bete se toh koi paisa nhi maanga. Par ab sari property par woh kabza kr rha hai... Aur woh uska sath de rahe hain... Hamare sath rehte the toh kahte thy hamaare pass paise hi nhi hain jo hain woh apna jeena marne ke liye hai. Jabki pension hai phir bhi. Kaise badal jate hain. Ek bete se paise lene aur dusre ko sab free mein. Par hamari koshish hai ki hum apne bachhe ke sath aisa kabhi nhi karenge.... i
Super sir. I agree with you 100%. This matter is not discussed by anyone but it is very essential and soothing point to the children. You are really great sir . Hats off to your way of thinking. Every parent should know that they are not doing ehsaan in bringing up children. The children have given opportunity to be parents. So, whatever you have said is correct. More and more parents should change their thought process in this matter.
My mother takes money from me and then gives it to her relatives who never show a iota of thanks to me nor her.. pata nahi ye bada banne ka kya keeda hai..
Yaar ye Insaan bilkul dil ki Baat Nikaal ke Rakh deta hai. Matlab kya bataun. I have really started Loving this person and the way he speaks seems so genuine. 💋💥💫🎯
So deep n bold. Well said.👌🙏 My two sons earn good now but we parents never ask for money from them. As love n respect they sometimes spend on us on birthday s or etc as their duty because they stay with us. People ask do they give money, I say we don't need it, we live according to our income. They have to make up for their lives. Parents r all love, support n guidance for their children not banks. This way the relationship grows sweet not bitter. Parents should be self depending but this is not always the case.
Yeh budda chutia bana raha hai.. iske chaaker mai aapne parents se muh mat modna... they are the one who will stand with you in your worst time..... there is a world above money...
with my parents blessings me and my wife earns combined gross income of 80 lakhs.. and blessed that my parents stays with us... and we take care of them... financially... and otherwise... bawli gaand hai yeh budda tau...😅
Sir what your saying is ok but don't forget Raja Harishchandra ko bhi sub chod ke samshan me Kam karna pada tha for a noble cause aur vachan nibhane ke liay. There may be thousand reasons when parents land up in hand to mouth condition.Factory lockdown, BIFR , jobless, health setback etc .When they do all the best with all the limitations for the child boy or girl it becomes the duty of the child to take responsibility of the Parents .I hope the children don't learn to think only about themselves .Nor the parents asking money to show status , upgrade lifestyle or fulfillment of their expensive dreams .It's very important to understand the gravity of the situation for both parties .Being middle class , having a considerable standard , from a good family background does not secure the future of the parents too. I was at the brink and had financial crisis, jobless , poor paid teachers salary as only option , etc even being cheated of our rightful inheritance of family property of my husband after all this .Life is hard and it's important to stand by family.Parents or children ❤.🙏👍🕉️
Sir, apne kuch jada sach bol dia es video me. Aisa sach jo bahut log sunna nai chahte par kisi ko stand leke sunana jaruri hai. We are looking forward to many such realistic videos.
Hi Sir, I am from Hyderabad aur past 6 months se apka content follow kar rahin hoon. This video made absolute sense, bilkul sahi bataya apne. Previous generations me jab employment kam thi aur earning jyada nahin hoti thi, most parents never made an attempt to save for their retirement during working years. May be because the families also had a large number of members and money was spent there completely . Youth like us should now start planning and investing for retirement so that we do not cause suffering to the next generations. We should set clear boundaries with parents righy since we start earning, so that there wouldnt he unrealistic expectations from them. Please make a video on how youth in their 20s and 30s should plan and build their retirment corpus.
Agreed. But , it was their choice to have kids and do for them. Kids need to do the same for their kids. It is toxic to live a life full of sense of entitlement from parents.
@@AnuShrivathsa true it was their choice to hv kids but many don't even take care of their own kids.If our parents hv reared us well, least we can do is to be grateful and love n care are too qualitative to be put on excel sheets. Mine put in a lot of love n effort, so i am grateful. That's all i wish to say😊
Yes one should give some money to one's parents ... But some children are helpless... They always want to give some financial assistance to theirs parents.. But now our country India is going through some humdrum of unemployment, especially west Bengal state, here is no proper option for a student to earn money as the whole state is going through corruption, syndicate, politiCal crisis and money laundering cases... Once west bengal is a superior state in India... But now this state 's condition is so unfortunate that the youth of bengal' s dream perished.. They are very very helpless.. They did not get any hope now... How they could help their parents as they are not carry their own burdens of expenditure... The situation is deteriorated day by day... Please sir give some hope of ray to west bengal 's youth
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Sir, main apna career Film making mein as a Director karna chahata hun.
Aap ek video film Making career per banaye please!
Sir, main apna career Film making mein as a Director karna chahata hun.
Aap ek video film Making career per banaye please!
Ye career kaisa hai ?
Sir ji I m government employee I m very coward I give to my parents 80% of my salary from 2018 @ the date of joining...Sir ji Me and my wife argument / fight on this in past I had 1 daughter and I m stop for children but my mother says 1 beta hona chahiye but God gives me 2 cute twins daughters last year sir ji andar se kuch samajh me nahi aata ki paap karu ya punya 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️
Every child has a responsibility towards their parents. Taking responsibility for parents' food, clothing, social protection of parents, health, giving parents a good life etc. "The son will become a big officer and drive around, and the parents will use buses, trams or rickshaws to go somewhere" because they don't have the ability to drive, is that what you mean? Do you mean "son will wear expensive clothes, shoes, father will wear slippers, pajama because father is not qualified to wear expensive clothes", oh parents have dedicated their lives to make you the best. "A poor parent taught his child to study, and that child did not see his parents, the son lived a beautiful life in a beautiful mansion like a rich man, and the poor parents remained poor in a tiled rice house. Because his parents did not deserve to live in a big mansion." . Is it what you call Indian society to be? More than 50% Indian society is still poor or lower class, but 90 % of them have Smartphone, 4g and 5g internet ,
Have you ever wondered what message will go to them?
Shame on you, 🤬🤬🤬
I think 🤔you are a test tube baby 😅😅😅😅😅 that's why you can't understand the relationship between parents and their children , and you never understand the Blood strain or blood relation between parents and children.
Sir I kept on giving money to my in laws unlimited. The moment I used to stop giving they used to throw me and kids out of the house. An spread news and say bahu karti hai kalesh. Socially all rumors. My mistake I got married in 1st Gen educated and were financially lower class family who was my spouse. Like you say rather got to say coming from a upper middle class family this was a blunder.
I want to add a little point here by giving a real example. My friend got a decent job in central government in West Bengal ( native Odisha). His salary was nearly ₹55,000/- per month. He never sent any money to his home because his family was rich enough. In course of time he accumulated a good sum of money. But the only mistake he did was he lent the money to his "local" friends in West Bengal with whom he used to play cricket in holidays. When he asked for his money, they delayed it for one year. After that when he asked money seriously, he went missing on that evening and his decomposed dead body was found hanging in neraby tower.
I just want to say that parents should atleast know when and where their child is spending the money until he gets married .
oh so terrible you cant trust anyone in this day and age
these are exceptional cases
Such a incident also happened with one of my relative!
Your friend is an adult and should know what is correct and what is wrong.If he took the decision to give money to friends then he should also take decision on how to wisely handle the decision. Don't expect parents to babysit a man baby.
Who gives money to strangers?
Parents ko flawless dikhaaya Gaya hai Hamaare culture mein. People forget that parents are humans with flaws. And every individual has been put on this earth to survive and in a good way. Dusrin ke liye karna hai to sant ban jao. Kisi ne nahin Roka.
I feel wise parents will never burden their children by asking for money unnecessarily and they will plan their retirement well. And wise children will always try to support and make their parents lives better (if they are in a better condition themselves). Because it's not about money, it's about the intentions. Giving happiness and comforts to parents bcoz they have been really understanding towards them and raised children with wisdom.
👍👍👌
You are really wise.
👍❤️❤️❤️❤️🇮🇳🕉️ Jai Hind Hope we have more children like you .🙏
Exactly
Agreed
You are absolutely right Sir, 12 year back my parent's did the samething , my younger brother has given money to my father, he has purchased plot on sister's name , now he is no more and sister need equal right in father's property and deny to sign on NOC, now she has more property then my brother , relation is too bad among us. Mother is supporting Sister. Ye sab raita parents ka failaya hua hai. Pehle unequality ki ek ko diya dusre ko nahi phir ab jo bacha hai usme bhi chayiye. Better club all asset and divide equally.
Marvelous Content!!
My parents have ripped me for show-off. Till I realized the back story, it was too late. Lost all relationships and am struggling broke!!
It happens.
Ditto dear
Lost confidence, relationships..... Same here
Your best video ever. This thing has happened with me. When I got my first govt service, my father started taking 20% - 30% of my income as his spending, that too for unaccountable reasons. So after giving him around 2.5L in 2 years of time, i gathered courage and started asking for the reasons. Then he started shouting at me, and due to this our relation had touched the bottom. Then I took a step ahead and called him to live with me so that spends become less. Now everything has started going to be good. But Amitji, your words in this video are true and absolutely reasonable. Thanks.
Dark reality of Indian society nobody can reveal 🙏🙏 sir u have great guts to taught new generation are suffering a lots
Right
In this world of nonsense, you stand out honest, genuine and clearly helping the society. I really like the way you address the issues. Thank you Sir.
True social reformer and educationalist. Pranam Amit sirji, God bless you abundantly.
Maine apni ankho k samne dekha ki ek maa ne apne bete ko ye tak ginwa diya ki maine tera jab accident ho gya tha to 8 lakh lgaye ye kiya wo kiya....i was surprised to listen this.... baki ye to normal hi h north india me तू इतना बड़ा ऐसे ही हो गया, हमने तुझे पैदा किया and frustration itni hoti h bachhe ko ki isse achha to mat hi krte paida... palne ka b ehsan gate h maa bap, har din sun sun k bcahha पक jata h.
It is highly logical n sensible❤
आप समाज के नाड़ी वैध हो। एकदम सटीक बताते हो सब।
Same here bro
Many Indian parents take their children for granted , and have a sense of entitlement.
His ability kitab karte hain aur agar lene ke time mehnge, branded saman chahiye aur Dene ke naam per purni, satin, unke pass useless pade hue bekar saman dekar apnapan dikhane ki koshishkarte hain.
Maine 2022 me may me 45000/- diya alag rehte hue. June me 15000/- uske baad october se fixed 55000/- ab tak continue hai
And july me meri surgery hui, 2022 se aaj tak ginwate hain ki teri surgery me 30000/- lagaye the. Ye vo aaj tak main sunta hu.
Truely 100% practical and unbiased approach.
In Maharashtra we read "manache shlok" by Ramdas Swami which says "nako re mana dravya te pudhilanche" means dont expect money/property from next generation and old generation.
Yes we should expect love/care from old and coming generation in return of love/ care from them.
Truely eye opener for old age society.
Sidhi baat no bakwas
My mom took away even last penny from my salary while marrying me off.. though my parents are financially strong and as such there was no short of money .. her words were "i gave my salary for my wedding and thats how it is done... you also have to do the same"
I had no say on how my salary was spend on my wedding... 😢
I will never pass such a trauma n pain to my daughters...
Wish this video was made earlier
Hard reality.
ya allah!! 😮
😕. God bless you child , keep going 👍💕. The contribution will come back to you in ways you cannot imagine 🙏 Sometimes parents think they r doing good.Time will only say .Don't loose hope , remember parents had to make a lot of compromises to keep the pot boiling .Give her the benifit of doubt .🙏❤️
Don't aliniate from your parents .Be on their side , try to understand them . Time will only say things , they have their reasons for so doing .The main thing is if they r really concerned about your well-being. I don't know if you r their only child or you have a brother .If you have tell them from now about how they r thinking about their property dispersal after them . If they have thought nothing about you tell them they had no right to use your money in your marriage so now they have to think also about you .Then keep distance from them ..🙏💕
At least your parents married you off . My parents were enjoying the money of my sisters. I was posted out of my state. Since they were pensioners they hardly needed money I didnt send them the money.
But my sisters were literally spending on all the upkeep and the parents couldn't leave the lifestyle they were enjoying. So they either made no effort or stalled their marriage.
Ultimately they searched for their own match and got married. Parents didn't spend a dime. After I was posted back.
They tried doing the same for me but I don't give I dime. So they are now trying to manipulate by showing the property lollypop.
But this doesn't work on me , but my sisters are still crackheads. No amount of explaining works.
Excellent Sangwanji. I recently discovered your videos and I found them extremely honest. You are the one holding a mirror towards the society and showing them their true faces which obviously people don't want to see.
I can vouch for this video because I myself witnessed this in my own family as well as my relative's families. I have gone thru enough pain in my life due to parents expectations. My mistake was that I kept giving the money for initial few years when I started job and wasn't saving anything for myself. And then a couple of friends have imparted some sense into me and I started saving for myself, so I started asking for the purpose when parents asked for money and I only gave what I found genuine and reasonable. I also took the medical insurance for both my parents..but just because I started discussing and openly questioning them about the purpose of asking money, my equation with them was suddenly changed. I, who was the best child became the bad one. So this is the reality of life , thanks for showing this up. I am now living my life on my own terms but it's not a very happy one because I don't share a good relationship with them anymore. 😢
My younger brother who was a student that time and I contributed a big time so that he could finish his studies but he doesn't even know who gave that money for his course because it was between myself and parents. Eventually, parents now only love him and his kids, I am more of an outsider.
Reality
Very good content
We r facing this situation from 40 years
वो कहते हैं कि चाहे चोरी कर के दो लेकिन हमें तो चाहिए ही चाहिए , क्योंकि हमने तुम्हें पैदा किया है
He has good pension , retired from a guzeted post
हमने उनसे कुछ नहीं लिया है ,
We make house by ourselves
He has a narcissistic personality
Toxic parents happen.
Go away from them , just chill & relax
If you taught us this 15 years ago, today many of us don't live in a measurable life!
Miserable life.
One who is living a miserable life in the sense of money is not the audience of Amit ji😜😜
👍😁😁😁❤️❤️🇮🇳😄😄
@@vijaysingh-dp2mu exactly , sir aise solutions dete hai jo upper middle class aur rich log hi follow karsakte hai , jaise purchasing 2 houses
When I got married, we lived with my in-laws, so actually divided the monthly expense and used to give our share to my in-laws. When we moved out of their house due to our jobs, neither they asked not we gave. As you said, we had taken medical insurance for them. When we went abroad for higher education, we did all the expenses without expecting any help from them. Now that we are doing good financially and being mother of growing son, I am clear that he would live separate after his marriage, this situation would never arise. Still thank you for sharing your knowledge.
Soo logical. I am the Parent of two kids. And totally agree with you. In future I will not becoming the bank. I will give a safe and free environment to both. Thank you for the clarity.
'Your parents are not your emergency fund, children are not your retirement fund'
आपको ये वीडियो 10 साल पहले बनाना था।
कुछ माता-पिता ऐसे भी होते हैं जो पेंशन पर अच्छी लाइफ जी होते हैं, फिर भी आवारा बच्चों के लिए जान देते हैं और जो बच्चा लाइफ में अच्छा कर रहा होता है उसके ही जीवन में कलेश करते हैं।
So true 😂
Correct
Correct
Ekdum sahe ek ludke par sub luta dete hai beti par aur jo sedua sadha beta humesa help karta hai humesa help karta hai ysko ghar ka kuttta samujj lete hai aur ha baar baar lecture dete hai bhedvhaaw karenge aur jo aacha ludka rahega usko kabhi help naye karenge aur ye bahu aur uske buccho me bhi karenge aisa khub ek ludka pura burbaae karta hai enka paisa aur aur baadme bure waqt me jo beto ko inhone pucha nahe usi ko help karne aur pura ghsr lekar chalne ke baat karte hai
Sir aapne jo jo bola hamare life mein bilkul wahi fit baith raha hai... Kal hi mai aur meri wife yeh sab baatein discuss kar rahe thhe aur aaj aapne clear keh diya. Thankyou very much sir to help us be free from any so called guilt imposed by the society.
I fully agree with this and idea of giving medical insurance premium is superb.
Sir, I request your video on one important topic.
Husbands sometimes get exploited by wife....he is supposed to spend all salary for family but wife spends more for herself like on parties, trips and parlour. She should be equally reaponsible to run the family.
Right
Yes pls amke video on this
Such an accurate assessment of Indian society. The soul of the country is that of money lenders. It is a bloody gerentocracy.
Right
Sir your content is amazing... today our generation is suffering coz parents act more of a bank than being a parent!
Hope your video gets viral and many understand working towards clarity. We have to break this cycle! Not only sons but daughters are also treated badly and in a biased way too.
Hats off to you for the clarity!
Right
Right issi wajah se ladkiyon ke shadi bhi nahi karte...paisa baat na jaye
@@priyankapattanaik5414 Aajkal ladkiyaan khud shadi nahi karna chaahti.Ladkiyon ko ghar basaane mein koi interest nahi hai.Sirf paisa kamaana chaahti hai.
@@priyankapattanaik5414 total matlabi people!
Never thought I would hear this bitter truth. There is a shloka in Durga Saptashati which underlines this very selfishness of human beings. I also believe in this. I give analogy of birds who take care of their yong ones until they learn to fly and leave the nest to make their own. We humans should learn from them
I have suffered all my life because of this habit of my husband…he was a gazettd officer but I lived hand to mouth..in-laws gave that money to their Daughter..I wish this video was there 40 years ago
Ur using ur husband id not urs shows what u are
Fortunately mene mere husband ko mana karne ko kaha aur wo tabse paise Dena band kr diya
Same I am facing
My father is retired gazetted officer and he's always asking for money everytime.
I know of this habit and fortunately my salary when I started working wasn't enough for me so I couldn't give him anything. And when I started making some decent amount I questioned him how he spent his pension. He doesn't tell me anything.
At the time of his retirement he hardly had anything in his account even though he didn't spend much on us when we were students. But his savings have become 4 times our entire saving and investments. Because he didn't spend a dime the day we started working. Not even on the children's marriages.
@@monishbeck3859
How to say no politely?
My parents became the bank since the time i went to college. And till today. I have told this exact argument with my parents. In return i got the answer that forever you have to repay. They will not put any figure bcz their want of return is unlimited. They will never ever understand. The argument reduced only after i started emotionally becoming distant from them. One instance also my mother asked me to gift a 20 k shoes. I gifted it. A few days later in an argument my mom exclaims that why do u think i asked u to gift ur dad that shoes, i was like why? And the answer just made me crumble into my bed literally.... As she said that in return of the gift i am going to get my father's ashirwaad. I thought parents blesssed us irrespective of gender, intelligence, or looks. But now i know that intellectual ability pe toh bachoan se hi inke blessings biased he, saath hi looks se bhi baised he, gender se toh sabko patah hi he kitna bais he ab paiso se bhi ashirwaad kharidne ke riwaaz chaalu ho gaye hen. Jis tarah mandiron mein business chalte he bhagwaan aur bhakton k beech ussi tarah ab parents bhi investment bankers ban rahe bache paida karke.
These things just widens the emotional distance with parents...
Yes you are right.
Bhaisaab…20K k shoes kaun pehen raha? Aapne kabhi Bhagwan ko kabhi itne mehenge joote chadaye hote toh shayad bada ashirwaad mil bhi jata😂 just Kidding…aap demand sunke hi mana kar dena chahiye tha…demands ki koi logical limit hoti hai bhai…
@@rahulbohra8338 Ve mata pita hain.Yeh unka adhikar hai.
So sad. Now be wise
This thinking will take time...but if parents are not having pension or any source of income...money needs to be given...
Exactly, it shouldn't be greed? In fact love and respect should be there on both sides not money, money and money
Right
@@neelamaggarwal4053 you too are right.
अरे सर हमने ऐसा देखा है कि माँ बाप बेटे के जीवन की सारी खुशियाँ खा गए। बेटे बहू को बसने ही नहीँ दिया ।इतना कंट्रोल किया। पर यह भी सच है कि सभी माता पिता ऐसे नहीं होते। बहुत से माता पिता अपनी ही संतानो पर सब लुटा कर भी अन्तिम समय में उनकी अवहेलना झेलते हैं।
Aap theek kehte hain.
Sahi
Aur usmein nanad bhi shamil hain.
@@DailyCollectionSoftware Shaayad yeh tumhara anubhav na ho lekin kadva sach hai.
@@DailyCollectionSoftware Tumne bhi aisa hi kiya hai kya?
Your parents are not your emergency money, your children are not your retirement fund. Build your own wealth.
Unfortunately our previous generation was not familiar with this gyan. So, we have to support them. But, we should not expect the same from the next generation.
Our previous generations were not in a position to be independent. Sab gareeb the. Now is the time to ensure that generations are aware
Yes you are right.
I agree to you .
Yes perfect
@@rishavbadola7357Kya Baath Kar Rahe ho?
If our previous generations were poor, they how come so much liquor and gambling were going on?
Correct Sir....I am a parent my kids are young but I have no expectation from them I only pray for my child to be happy successful n healthy ....very true what we are doing is our duty our responsibility so we should not do it thinking about the return let them live their life wisely n happily
I am proud our country has you. ❤ I don't know you will read it or not, but I watch every video of yours and you're indispensable. 🌟
Thanks for kind words
I faced the same situation.
I buy groceries, pay bills , bought health insurance, still my mother ask for money and always compares me with my cousin telling like my cousins give x amount to their parents.
My main regret is I revealed my salary to my parents and now they are like itna jyada kamate h itna bhi Nehi de sakta.
Thanks for putting this issue into light.
The life of a guy is very hard jitna bhi Karo last me sunne ko milte h
Tune hamare liye kya kiya😢😢
Yes, it is sad state. Please do the best you can, do not let them take a guilt trip and try living and enjoying your life.
My father in law left 6 crore of loan
We are repaying till now...still no respect....but i always sayto my husband we will never give one rupee loan to our children and ruin their life
Oh my God! 6 crore? Iska emi bharte bharte to zindagi chali jyegi aur savings bhi zero rehegi... kaise manage kr rahe ho app?
My husband gave their 8 year income to their family before marriage, after marriage we faced so many financial problems but parents ab bhi happy nhi h😢
Very good video sir, i as a parent do not expect anything from my children once they become financially independent. I believe that we should save enough for our old age so that as parents we dont have to ask our children for money and they can live their own life on their own terms, burdenless..and if they want to give it should be from their own free will and not forced.
And if at all they need our financial support then be ready for the same.
@@tushar4820 ?????
For the first time i have seen someone say "Parents ka pyar kabhi pure ho hi nahi sakta". Its quite logical! Kids are innocent and pure when young and that is why only the kid could love the parent in this relationship.
I spent my entire 6.5 years of savings to buy my parents a flat and am proud of it and my parents never asked for money.
Very Good Dost
If parents and you are agree then no issue
You're very fortunate and may god bless your for carrying such a positive message. But there are unfortunate people who are exploited emotionally, financially and socially. I hope everyone gets parents like you.
Are you the only child?? Or do you have siblings??
if parents hv not planned their retirement, mediclaime, upto how much should pay for their treatments esoecially after 75- 80 yrs. plz make videi, I hv seen so many people taking loan n crying bcz of it.
Thank you.
Kat gaya
Absolutely 💯 i believe the same. Until its not needed genuinely,why to ask money from children? Me as a mother will always wish to give love, support n whatever they need to my children
Huge respect to you
You give such logical explanations to problems no one wants to talk about....👏👏👏
Sir everything you explained in your talk is reality,I am agree with you 100% . It’s parents job to raise their children and provide the best they can until their children are independent and on their feet. It’s not children’s responsibility/duty to pay back or be financially responsible for the parents. Children have their own responsibilities and needs in their
lives. And when they get married, they will have the same responsibilities as the parents had once. So it’s a circle, let it move smoothly. We are in late sixties
Totally independent by the Grace of God! And so proud of ourselves.
Lol, my husband funded 50% of a flat my mother in law bought on her name saying she will gift him on his wedding, now she refuses to transfer the flat on his name not even 50% of it, she says mere bad sab tumhara hai, he has 2 sisters also there's no will & they are so ready to ask for their share... At the time he was buying it i wasn't married to him but i kinda indirectly told him not to do this but indian society me aisi bat karne wali bahu chudail aur ghar todne wali hoti hai now he's seen the reality, anyway i am kinda happy atleast real faces to samne aae uske.
Same problem everywhere... My sister's mother-in-law always threatens my sister that she will divide the property equally between her 4 kids ( 1 son, 3 daughters)...
@@Crispr_cas9th see i don't have a problem with that it's their property they can divide in all children or even give it to anyone it's their hard work so we don't have any right to ask but where my husband's invested his money that should be given to him... That's all.
@@malvikamishra9545 no.. The problem here is that all her daughters keep visiting my sister's home and stay for 15-20 days.. And don't help my sister at all...Even when all of them are married they keep on asking for money and stuff... They interfere too much... If they want their share, they should take it and settle the matter permanently instead of creating nuisances.. And also if people have intentions to divide the property then they should not lie at the time of marriage that everything belongs to our son and take huge dowry... Its kind of a scam that u take dowry according to ur property and then after marriage u distribute it to everyone...
@malvikamishra9545, your husband 50% will also divide all his siblings. Pls don't mind, this will happen. So better keep yourself away to avoid any future losses.
Apke husband ka koi right nhi hai because marriage se pehle mother ko gift kiya hai. Ab ye mother ka right hai, wo kisko bhi de. Maine khud 7 years ki salary parents ko di hai aur ek built house bhi.
I can recall discussing the same things with my husband 6 years back sitting in a crowded park and speaking slowly to avoid anybody hearing it as such things are not accepted by society. That time I myself was not sure whether I am thinking right but with time and maturity, I was able to evaluate my thoughts and started having a strong conviction in them.
Thanks for sharing such useful content and coming from an experienced professional, it really means a lot.
😊i am exactly with this thought. Not taking money from children though they are quite capable. When people say that you have successfull children so you may get financial support. My husband is no more and i was housewife officially still i want to remain financially independent and self sufficient. I don’t want to bother my children as I believe that they worked hard for their's success. I was only service provider. I bless them for their success ahead.
Brilliant msg.... I was also of the thought that child should give money to their parents.... bt izzat ?????..... ab bahut achi clarity mil gayi... unhe ek achi education diya taki wo apni life jee sake.... ab jo money humare pass hai agle jitne saal hai wo khud ke lifestyle n health wellness pe kharche....❤❤❤❤
Sir,,parents jab job mei the toh unki salary 900/- (1980s) hoti thi..aaj inflation has lead to change in this dynamic..and salary is 50000/-..they are in the impression ki humaare kharche hundreds mei hai aur kamaai thousands mei...and trust me this backfires big time..specially if you are a girl and helped parents create assets and now you cannot use them..BECAUSE YOU ARE A GIRL.!!
You won't be allowed to use the assets You helped create. I helped my father to buy real estate by giving nearly 50 percent share many times in my fathers name. I heard talks to the entire property being passed on to my brother and his wife for more than a decade now. Had lots of heartburn but have been talking to him and reminding him of my contributions which were never returned. Now, he has agreed to give me a small share
One day one colleague seems depressed so I asked him what happened, he told me he took & used all 5-6 years of saving to build house in home town now his father want to give 50% shares of house to his daughter also
Many present day parents are using hardened money of IT emplyoed Son's in a very very Laxuarly way. This poor bachuars sending without questoing. A good advice for all. Thank you sir.
It is hard earned money....
Not hardened moneyy.
First time literally first time I'm seeing someone speaking my heart out.... Thankyou Sir for vocalising such a serious issue....
First of all, thank you from the bottom of my heart for bringing up this topic. Nobody I say nobody in India talks about these sensitive topics. They are like 'forgive your parents and all'.
My father told me once 'I have spent 3 lakh almost to raise a kid like you'. I told him 'Who asked you to have me in the first place? You should have thought before marriage if you even want kids or not '. He came to beat me. My father is one of those who purposely badmouths about his daughter in the society. Mere father sabko bolte phire ki I don't give him money. Mother bhi waisi hai.
I don't have any respect left for them. They only talk to me because they need money. Main jitna na burden bani unpe, woh mere pe burden baan e rahe aur aaj bhi hai.
Girl my sympathies for u. Create ur future with ur husband n kids as u r already financially independent n don't waste ur life thinking ur parents thinking will change. Wishing u happiness in life.❤
Esliye to sravan kumar hua sravan kumari mhi
@@informative_.y5xqfir ye kee do.... Jaisi soch vala admi aaya ...isey to video vale sir se problem hogi .... Ye nirupa roy k drame me hi maraa ja raha
very well said!! Respect to u sir...I would like to share my story, my mother asked money for taking care of me and my babies till they were 3 years old and Now I have lost respect for her. Its not about money if she would have asked nicely but she demanded like she had done a favour. I have spent a lot of husband's money on her needs from last 16 years, paying for my brother's cancer treatment, his alcohol rehab and his depression treatment. I m tired of all that...Now I know she is surely a selfish women who doesnt care about me but only her son.
yes , mothers and daughters feed on each others toxicity. Daughters are gullible and mothers easily exploit them. It is usually very late the daughters realize this and lot of damage is already done by then.
Yes, you should give money to parents if they really need it and are financially not secure. But I thinks it's the parent's responsibly also to have a comfortable retirement saving and lead by example for their children & not depend on them. There are cases where parents invest their whole life saving to get their children a fancy abroad education. In such cases, it's the children's responsibility to help their parents financially once they start earning. It's the youths responsibility to ensure their parents don't lose their wealth in getting them an education. And if that is the only way, they must take responsibility for that and share the financial burden with their parents once they start earning.
Yeh budda chutia bana raha hai.. iske chaaker mai aapne parents se muh mat modna... they are the one who will stand with you in your worst time..... there is a world above money...
Bawli gaand hai yo tau
Well said
That's a balanced opinion.
You should start making videos...such a logical balanced answer.
If parents are financially dependent on you, then only you should provide them
My opinion 80 percent youth are dependent on parents😊 particularly govt servents with pension
Sir, you are encouraging earning youth for questioning parents & to heart them. Now a days how many children's are obedient and careful of parents ? This lesson is addition to them.
Thank u & be careful about yourself in future, never knows.
Very nice advice. Many parents need this advice because they exploits their children throughout their life and they don't understand that they're exploiting their children.
Bhai waah!!! I am impressed because I have been there, done that, and now I resent my parents. I learnt the hard way that Adharmi ke saath Dharm nahi nibhaate. Kyunki unko oongli dete hai toh woh galaa pakad lete hai. I almost always never comment on social media, but Uncle, please accept my appreciation. Great job!
Sir meri saas meri shadi ke baad muje sunati thi ki me tumhare pati ki padhai ke liye apna FD tor di thi. Mere papa ne khafi dahej diya tha fir bhi muje sunati thi.😂 muje lagta tha jaise vo apna beta nhi padha rahi mere pati ko padha rahi thi. UP me jab ladke wale aate h arrange marriage karne to bolte h ki hamne apne bete ki padhai me itna lagaya h to itna dahej to milna hi chachiye. Raj to apki beti hi karegi 😂😂. UP ki saaso ko apni bahuo ka raj karne ka bahut dukh rahta h. 😂😂. Mere pati to apne maa baap ka kraj utarne ke liye apne chote bhai ka kharcha pure 11 saal uthae taki vo IAS ya PCS ban jaye lekin jab hame apni beti ko foreign bhejna tha to koi udhar bhi money nhi diya. Upar se mere husband ke bhai ne unpar aarop lagaya ki vo LIC ki kist bar rahe the kya jo ab paisa maang rahe h. Sab logo se anurodh h ki jinke maa baap bacho ki line laga kar apne bade beto per apne chote baccho ki jimedari daal dete h vo jimmedari mat uthaye. Vohi chota bhai kal ko aaka sabsa bada dusman ban jayega
👍🏻well said
I agree with you , some parents think that children cannot handle money and they want to invest or spend their way.
Now-a- days children also pressurise parents to finance their studies abroad with their savings. I have seen many cases where parets spend all the money and end up spending miserable life because children dont repay them.
Excellent video sir! I agree with every word you said. One should help parents when there is emergency, take out health insurance for parents but paying monthly emi is very expensive for couples with kids. For our parents in Mumbai the expenses are so high, paying 15-20k a month for both parents and in-laws is like paying to bank :) . It is very sensitive subject, most will disagree with you due to their emotions/love for parents. But truth is always bitter and mindset change is a must. Unless you know someday that money will return in some form, one should count and contribute for emergency or basic necessities. Anything beyond that make no sense. Also we have to prepare for our own emergencies , care for kids and retirement fund as no one is going to help us during our old age. Paying this monthly undisclosed emi is an unfortunate monthly stress to finances.
Parents should have helped their children only in emergency but not for regular expensive education and expensive demands of their children by sacrificing their whole life.
@@sunnyghosh7371 I see you are blinded by the emotions. Also that you are assuming everyone receives expensive education and places expensive demands. There are majority of people (including me) who have studied in government schools in small town not in city and have paid our student loan to complete 3 years of higher studies. More importantly where you see sacrifice I see greed for emotional support/love to live happy life. Parents gave birth to a child to fulfil sense of belonging and have more people around them who can love them to feel secure. Life becomes boring after 40 age if you do not have children so having a child is like filling the emptiness (Greed) . The moment as a Parent you decide and give birth to a child, the responsibility is solely with Parents to take care of child and give basic necessities. Children have not taken birth to serve parents thats like giving birth to slavery. Parents control what you can give and what not. to children. infact also what they study /learn. In return they receive love, care, support, fun time from children. So please don't bring the word sacrifice , it is rather Parent's greed. This cycle continues and every Child becomes parent one day and follows the same.
You're doing a great work Sirji 🙏🏻
There is also a common trend among parents, they put money into our studies and expect us to choose the career of their choice. And they always choose the obvious "UPSC" and pressurise us to give exam amd waste our life in it's pursuit. I myself has WASTED many years of my precious youth due to my parents and family pressure to go for UPSC. Can you please make a video on this topic, addressing parents of this country: "की भैया अब सरकारी नौकरी का मोह त्यागो". Your previous videos has helped me a lot 🙏🏻. Please continue making more such videos on UPSC and Govt jobs. When such videos will go out in the public, someday our society will be free from the clutches of "Govt Jobs" and "Exam Culture".
Thanks again Sirji 🙏🏻
Yes.Things should change to save the precious childhood wasted in education.
totally agree! it was a torture!
What is the law says in this regarding???
Can mother can demand cash on monthly basis????
Kindly anyone answer this please in point of law
You are a true legend Sir. It seems like you are saying what my heart always feels but kahin guilt me rehti thi k soch galat hai meri because society k norms se opposite soch hai. But your thoughts which are aligning with mine gave me the relief that yes its true and valid. I hope every parent gets the chance to listen to you. Thank you.
I am lucky to have found ur video Sir....I also deal with things differently and don't follow the tradition which is unnecessary and ur points match with mine exactly....I was about to take a wrong decision and then I found ur video and changed my decision and now I am really happy ...
Sir.. In South India.. Many parents don't want to get their working daughters married.. Because... They want total control... Of their daughters... Salary
This phenomenon isn't limited to south india bro!!
True
Its coming in north India as well. Parents are enjoying salary of thier daughters and dont want them to get married
@@vyaptimehradid you face the same?
Agree
👍🏻my straight answer - Bilkul Nahi dene chahiye. Unke paas already unki savings aur property hai. Youngsters ko apne paise apni "Wife" aur apne Future Plans ke liye sambhaal ke rakhne chahiye. Parents ne Youngsters ko bahut pareshaan kar ke rakha hai
Sahi bol rahe hai
Parents don't trust kids but they are ready to take your salary and ask you. To trust them. They have Everything property, money and still they are insecure in trusting their kids U work in their house give time money and in return they say this is their house leave or stay as they like
Better live on rent
agar Parents ko paise de diye to apni marzi se Love Marriage bhi nahi kar sakte kyuki aap ke paise Parents ne dabaa diye hain !!
Wife ko bhi hisaab se do
Joruka gulam
True
I'm proud of parents they never asked me money till now and they work very hard in agriculture even though they don't need to work.
Not everyone get parents like me
mai 19 ki age se job karna start kar di thi now 21 year old mai call centres mai kaam karti hu meri almost pura paisa ghr pe le lete hai or naahi meri study ke liye kuch karte mai chid ke apne gayi jagah job chodh di or har waqt mujhse paise mangte mere rakhe hue paise bhi mangte hai ab toh mere pass 500 bhi rehta hai toh usmai se bhi mangte hai mai tang aa chuki hu ekdum
I always give everything to my parents as they have gone through very tough time since my childhood but after few years I have observed that their expectations are increasing day by day 😮...and now I am feeling it is like burden for me I also don't find appreciation or satisfaction coz anything I do they became judgemental 😢...love between us vanished and there is only relation for money exists 😣
Realy Sad but very true
It’s very simple
It’s your HARD WORK.
Its YOUR MONEY it’s good to give but always keep a boundary
You have a whole life to live and without learning money management you will not survive
My parents have not even asked for a single penny from me, they don't even know what my salary is. Even when I voluntarily gift something with my choice to them, they always feel bad that the gift is too expensive and money should not be wasted. 😅 They even ask me that if I need money, leave alone seeking any monetary help from me 😅
Same here ❤
Mostly parents are like this. This oldie has torn apart family.
A very cruel suggestion...shame... Parents to be treated well till they are alive. This is India... Teach something to the kids and their spouse ..
You are lucky bro
Topic is really worth to discuss upon , you are playing a great role in bringing clarity to life
I think your idea to reform the Indian society toward the western way of life and thinking is great . The new generation of indians and the blame game parents /children you mentioned should smoothly disappear with assertiveness of the new generation. I feel sorry for these young couple living in very basic condition in Australia and still need to send money every month regardless they survive with their low pay wages otherwise they start getting txt message call from their elders regarding money.Your topic is very interesting.
You are right.
Don't have much expectations. Just give 15k per month and that's all. Will keep it that way till it becomes 10% of my income. Currently it's 20%.
Have medical insurance for them. But that's all. Nothing else. Needs and not wants.
Bhai meri b same problem hai ....mai nhi chata age Jake box lagne Lage bhain ko apise Dene mai 5k per month if salary is 75
This is exactly happened with me sirji.
my parents kept on asking money 💰 🤑 and my father splurged and my mom gives people money on interest who don't pay her back.
Basically they are using my hard earned money and wasting it and again they make faces that they are poor.
I think once u start earning comfortably,
1. Set aside a fixed percentage of your salary for your parents in case they require money (5/10/15/20% depending upon how much u earn) and pay them monthly,
2. Approval of your spouse is necessary for the same.
3. Take health insurance for parents (best investment) as health emergencies could cost you a fortune.
Who is the spouse to give approval ?
Spouse bhi bolegi ki mere bhi maa baap hai... Mai apna Paisa vha bhejungi. Then Husband ki permission bhi zaroori hai ?
Kyuki Parents to dono ke hi hai... Farz to dono ka Banta hai.
Simple way is.. Ladka apne parents ko apne hisab se de. Aur Ladki apne hisab se apne parents ko. Aur ek mutual understanding ho dono me is baat ko leke.
If the girl earns does even anyone asks where her money is going, stop taking feminism approach , Be a Man dude
@@rohanranjan616khayali pulaav....practically aisa hota nahi hai...
@@navinojha5637spouse is biwi aur kya...use bhi ghar chalana hai....pati baat maane ya na maane wo bolegi to sahi na
My brother's also gave money to my father when he is alive for spend extra expenditure and my father was a pensioner...😂😂but my father deposited all money to Rd and fd coz he knew kids may not saving...
Sir You are Doing what Gordan Ramsey is doing in USA...Your words are true and correct....I was looking for someone like him but talks as per Indian situation...I am Gratefull I saw your Channel...Thanks A Lot!!
Not even 24 hrs ago my mom told me that we spent so much on your education and you are still not earning. You shud get married because if you're a woman and youre not an IAS or a Doc/Engg then you're worthless in this society. Not a single man will marry you and me and your dad cant keep taking care of you financially forever. Its our money which we earned through hardwork. Marry any 'rickshawallah' you can find and get off our chests.
The fact that you mention the gender lens parents wear when they look at their kids....its like.... it opened my brain like...what the hell, Ive never thot about it that way.
Technically they are not wrong, if you are 18+, also a graduate and still not making money then you are liability on society in long term.
You can start thinking about becoming independent by earning money.
If you can't do that you can find a guy who does that for you and get married.
@@techihandleI didn't earn a penny until 21. Never have I taken money after that. Hold on till college. The upside is huge.
@@sreyanshuchaterjee3962 absolutely!
ya allah ! itna dukh ! better to search any job or work !
Sanskriti...hamari sanskriti hi kharaab hai.
Aapke jaisa clear video koi nahi bana sakta sir. Aise video banane ke liye himmat chahiye. I’m very happy with your videos
Great content, Sir. Can you do a video on the parents showing favouritism and unfair property distribution
Words of wisdom from Mr Amit Sangwan on current family issues. Thks!
Sir please make something for new parents. I am going to be a mother soon and sometimes I feel anxious by thinking about what kind of parent I'm going to be. I don't want to pass any trauma to my kids knowingly or unknowingly. I don't want them to feel the same things we face with our parents.
You are wise.
Should not expect from children anything... that is it
Life is ruined when husband gives money to his parents n his brothers n sisters, all life n all not satisfied n very bad bahu. This is our society. Parents are also like this want all money n yet not satisfied. Thanks for this topic.
I am 30. Married. My maama, mausi and all maternal side relatives ask money from my mother. I have 2 maama and 2 maami. Both couple (i.e all 4) have jobs. My mother is naive and always gives money. My masi also has a job, although the salary is not good just 30k a month at the age of 50. But they have house in Delhi. They have property in ancestral village also. But they don't manage money well. And when in need they ask us. Same with maama also. They recently bought a 8lk car whereas they could afford 4lk car. Now they ask us money.
Me and my sister also wish to lead a lavish life. Go on foreign trips. But we save money. And when we say to our mother that we are planning to go for a trip. Then she lecture us about saving money. We can easily afford a couple of foreign trips, buy luxury items. But mom don't allow, not even with our own money. But she doesn't lecture her relatives. And our cousins enjoy a lot. They don't save money.
Dam... True. Same thing happing in my house that's why lots of problem has created since 2-3 years
U r absolutely right, My inlaws also demand money, grocery, all the bills , cab bills, and all the demands of their 2 daughters from my husband whos is their only Son in the name of " their House will be given to the Son " which is not gurented coz all the life they want to give everything to their daughters. And my husband Give money to parents and his parents put money in the bank which they dnt even show, discussed or Spent on us and plus they are also having their income and pension also still they want everything from son coz he has brought his wife in their house . I am so helpless My opinion stands no where And saying such bold and eye-opening statements in India is Taboo😢. God bless to such sons who are working hard and Not saving any money for their wife and children. And giving everything to parents who inly want to fill their daughters demand.This generation Son's will not be having any pensions or Hospital free facility. Juss earning in lakhs and spending all. No retirement security.
How to deal with statements like “paise kya Kama liye.. Khud ko parents se bada samajhne lage ho”..
Be matured and ignore such statements
Adipurus dikhao😊
U r 100percent correct. I totally agree with you.
Sir u r right. Mere saas sasur toh shadi ke baad hi bolne lage ki ab har mahine aadha kharcha dena padega. Hamse to 8 saal tak paise liye. Jab tak unke sath rahe. Par dusre bete se toh koi paisa nhi maanga. Par ab sari property par woh kabza kr rha hai... Aur woh uska sath de rahe hain... Hamare sath rehte the toh kahte thy hamaare pass paise hi nhi hain jo hain woh apna jeena marne ke liye hai. Jabki pension hai phir bhi. Kaise badal jate hain. Ek bete se paise lene aur dusre ko sab free mein. Par hamari koshish hai ki hum apne bachhe ke sath aisa kabhi nhi karenge....
i
Aapki kitni achhi tarah yeh batein samjha rhe hain. Really great..
Super sir. I agree with you 100%.
This matter is not discussed by anyone but it is very essential and soothing point to the children.
You are really great sir .
Hats off to your way of thinking.
Every parent should know that they are not doing ehsaan in bringing up children. The children have given opportunity to be parents.
So, whatever you have said is correct. More and more parents should change their thought process in this matter.
Right
Very well explained sir...
Till date nobody has covered such practical topics in detail
My mother takes money from me and then gives it to her relatives who never show a iota of thanks to me nor her.. pata nahi ye bada banne ka kya keeda hai..
Yaar ye Insaan bilkul dil ki Baat Nikaal ke Rakh deta hai. Matlab kya bataun. I have really started Loving this person and the way he speaks seems so genuine. 💋💥💫🎯
So deep n bold. Well said.👌🙏
My two sons earn good now but we parents never ask for money from them.
As love n respect they sometimes spend on us on birthday s or etc as their duty because they stay with us.
People ask do they give money, I say we don't need it, we live according to our income. They have to make up for their lives. Parents r all love, support n guidance for their children not banks.
This way the relationship grows sweet not bitter. Parents should be self depending but this is not always the case.
Yeh budda chutia bana raha hai.. iske chaaker mai aapne parents se muh mat modna... they are the one who will stand with you in your worst time..... there is a world above money...
with my parents blessings me and my wife earns combined gross income of 80 lakhs.. and blessed that my parents stays with us... and we take care of them... financially... and otherwise... bawli gaand hai yeh budda tau...😅
Sir what your saying is ok but don't forget Raja Harishchandra ko bhi sub chod ke samshan me Kam karna pada tha for a noble cause aur vachan nibhane ke liay. There may be thousand reasons when parents land up in hand to mouth condition.Factory lockdown, BIFR , jobless, health setback etc .When they do all the best with all the limitations for the child boy or girl it becomes the duty of the child to take responsibility of the Parents .I hope the children don't learn to think only about themselves .Nor the parents asking money to show status , upgrade lifestyle or fulfillment of their expensive dreams .It's very important to understand the gravity of the situation for both parties .Being middle class , having a considerable standard , from a good family background does not secure the future of the parents too. I was at the brink and had financial crisis, jobless , poor paid teachers salary as only option , etc even being cheated of our rightful inheritance of family property of my husband after all this .Life is hard and it's important to stand by family.Parents or children ❤.🙏👍🕉️
@@kalyanichatterjee1711 I agree
@@varshas8745 .❤️🙏👍😍
Sir, apne kuch jada sach bol dia es video me. Aisa sach jo bahut log sunna nai chahte par kisi ko stand leke sunana jaruri hai. We are looking forward to many such realistic videos.
Hi Sir, I am from Hyderabad aur past 6 months se apka content follow kar rahin hoon. This video made absolute sense, bilkul sahi bataya apne. Previous generations me jab employment kam thi aur earning jyada nahin hoti thi, most parents never made an attempt to save for their retirement during working years. May be because the families also had a large number of members and money was spent there completely . Youth like us should now start planning and investing for retirement so that we do not cause suffering to the next generations. We should set clear boundaries with parents righy since we start earning, so that there wouldnt he unrealistic expectations from them. Please make a video on how youth in their 20s and 30s should plan and build their retirment corpus.
On point. Very nicely explained. So much clarity of thoughts you have Guruji
What parents have sacrificed in their own time can never be compensated on excel.
Agreed. But , it was their choice to have kids and do for them. Kids need to do the same for their kids. It is toxic to live a life full of sense of entitlement from parents.
@@AnuShrivathsa true it was their choice to hv kids but many don't even take care of their own kids.If our parents hv reared us well, least we can do is to be grateful and love n care are too qualitative to be put on excel sheets. Mine put in a lot of love n effort, so i am grateful. That's all i wish to say😊
Yes one should give some money to one's parents ... But some children are helpless... They always want to give some financial assistance to theirs parents.. But now our country India is going through some humdrum of unemployment, especially west Bengal state, here is no proper option for a student to earn money as the whole state is going through corruption, syndicate, politiCal crisis and money laundering cases... Once west bengal is a superior state in India... But now this state 's condition is so unfortunate that the youth of bengal' s dream perished.. They are very very helpless.. They did not get any hope now... How they could help their parents as they are not carry their own burdens of expenditure... The situation is deteriorated day by day... Please sir give some hope of ray to west bengal 's youth
Do any business like Biharis.
Leave West Bengal and take up job somewhere else only option