The therapist stereotype reflects a persistent reality. I don't think people love INFJs as much as they love the way that they feel in an INFJ's presence: unconditionally seen, heard and loved. It's an uncanny, rare and transformational respite from the harsh realities and norms of the contemporary world that you can't really get elsewhere. That's why INFJs are often met with extreme reactions when they try to set boundaries and/or assert their own needs. Yes, it's a common human reaction to change, *and* it's a testament to just how addicted people can get to the INFJ's quality of attention, care and love.
It’s an odd objectification. Humanity likes to pick a ”best”. It’s a bit of a fantasy; we all want to believe in or hold onto some kind of magic. I think it has to do with wanting to be close to sensitivity, spirituality, authenticity, compassion because it feels like the world is lacking. INFJs probably feel like a warm, much needed hug. That is a beautiful thing, to want to be close to these things, but we can all be these things. What is actually the “best” is cultivating these things in oneself ❤.Just another way of saying what you have already said…the therapist.
Do you think psychology has become too statistical and hence why it has generally dismissed MBTI? Also has anyone tried to ‘prove’ MBTI in studies to give it more academic credibility? Maybe a video to discuss this?
On a deeper, spiritual level, our minds are a reflection of our souls, and that attracts both the negative (narcissists, people with psychological issues/toxic people) & positive (people liking our spiritual leadership/therapist/counselor qualities). However, on the therapist/counselor point, I do enjoy helping. BUT... The irritating factor is spending the time giving people the therapy session or counseling advice only for them to do the opposite. Then come back to us as though we didn't tell them if they did the opposite, that those results would happen. Then we end up drained & confused if we should even help them out again, because we feel as though they won't listen.
Not sure about praising part. While I thought I was INTP, it was all privilege and compliments anywhere I turned online, for "my" type. And felt quite good about my self. When I realized I'm INFJ, and watched a lot more videos of that type, I started feeling a lot more criticized and "hated", not constantly complimented and praised like INTP's are mostly. (With some ethereal woo woo compliments for the INFJ side here and there I could never take fully seriously) Generally being in online MBTI communities, I felt a lot more privileged, special and welcomed while I was in INTP land. After transitioning to INFJ, there was a noticeable lowering of self esteem from the standpoint of how my type is talked about and how I felt about it. Which in turn made me observe, when it comes to being the true snowflakes of the MBTI world, and getting mostly praise (even hidden in criticism), it's really the NT's, especially xNTP's. Where even the weaknesses are laughed off as just cute and funny or quirky, so they get the best of both worlds.
@@Bobby_101 Very interesting (though sorry to hear you went through that). You’re right about INTx and maybe the word “praise” is not quite right. I think the “love” that INFJs receive is often, paradoxically enough, predicated on the notion of INFJs not thinking too highly of themselves. It’s very complex and I’ll have to mull this over further.
@@RensRoom It's all good, the INFJ identification is mostly an online phenomena, and not taken too deep into real life for me. I'd add, the main reason for most of the criticism we get is obvious, it's other types being annoyed with the "INFJ is so rare" rhetoric, so we get a slightly irrational level of some people trying to put us down at certain places. Also a bit of crabs in the bucket phenomena, not to let us feel to special. Which is to be expected, no matter which type would have turned out the rarest. I'd say INTJ being rare Ni dom gets some of this type of criticism too.. it bleeds over to them as well, but the other NT's are safe from it.
Perhaps you should step outside your psychoanalysis bubble for a while, and realize that it's not reality. While people, for some reason, always tend to trust me with their problems really quickly and confide in me. Without me even offering it, which can be frustrating, since I usually don't want to tell them off; though that's has to change. It's also true that an INFJ's malleable external personality proves rich ground for shadow projection of unkind people. My experience in Germany has been, that that very often leads to bullying and ostracization. I'm mostly over that now, but just as some people do trust INFJ's easily, some people take the exact opposite route. As with the personality itself - a potpourri of paradoxes - so it is with other's reacting to our personality. Maybe it's different for those who actually delve into Jungian Psychology, but I can tell you that most people out there have no idea what an INFJ even is, let alone are gonna ask how to meet more of them.
Consistent bullying and manipulation will inevitably awaken the Si demon, either erupting into a supernova or manifesting as a shadow integration. It’s hard to envision any INFJ enduring prolonged abuse without a major eruption or a meticulously calculated manipulation that dismantles their opponent piece by piece. Perhaps this is the unconscious allure dark psyches feel toward INFJs-deep down, they crave submission and corruption, mirroring the wounds they themselves endured in childhood.
@@tg_5565 Yes, though it’s true that I didn’t make that completely clear in the video. I think the mbti community is revealing of a more widespread phenomenon that does not conceptualise things in terms of types.
What I'm genuinely anxious about recently is that we might become so likeable that people will become addicted to us like a drug and that we might make them suffer a lot when we need alone time or when we aren't present for them. Becoming a great and irrepleacible support for them might actually do them a disservice. Now I'm starting to question whether it's a good idea to be a good person if you become so appreciated that you become a problem in people's lives. Is it ok to give the best of you for others if that means they'll stick to you like glue and won't try to take their independance? I usually consider people capable to take their own decisions but being very nice seem to encourage people to become dependent. When you want the best for others, is it really the best that you offer to others?
@@obidavekenobe It could be projections on both sides, but I think that that is correct that INFJs (many, not all) are more hiding themselves that gives more place for projections. May be this is their tactics for be more loved? :D
The therapist stereotype reflects a persistent reality. I don't think people love INFJs as much as they love the way that they feel in an INFJ's presence: unconditionally seen, heard and loved. It's an uncanny, rare and transformational respite from the harsh realities and norms of the contemporary world that you can't really get elsewhere.
That's why INFJs are often met with extreme reactions when they try to set boundaries and/or assert their own needs. Yes, it's a common human reaction to change, *and* it's a testament to just how addicted people can get to the INFJ's quality of attention, care and love.
It’s an odd objectification. Humanity likes to pick a ”best”. It’s a bit of a fantasy; we all want to believe in or hold onto some kind of magic. I think it has to do with wanting to be close to sensitivity, spirituality, authenticity, compassion because it feels like the world is lacking. INFJs probably feel like a warm, much needed hug. That is a beautiful thing, to want to be close to these things, but we can all be these things. What is actually the “best” is cultivating these things in oneself ❤.Just another way of saying what you have already said…the therapist.
@@tg_5565 You mentioned the core phenomenon at play here: fantasy. I’ll have more to say about this in an upcoming video.
because we are doormats pretty much and we make people feel special
Do you think psychology has become too statistical and hence why it has generally dismissed MBTI? Also has anyone tried to ‘prove’ MBTI in studies to give it more academic credibility? Maybe a video to discuss this?
On a deeper, spiritual level, our minds are a reflection of our souls, and that attracts both the negative (narcissists, people with psychological issues/toxic people) & positive (people liking our spiritual leadership/therapist/counselor qualities). However, on the therapist/counselor point, I do enjoy helping. BUT... The irritating factor is spending the time giving people the therapy session or counseling advice only for them to do the opposite. Then come back to us as though we didn't tell them if they did the opposite, that those results would happen. Then we end up drained & confused if we should even help them out again, because we feel as though they won't listen.
It’s no mythology- the energy is astounding.
It’s not so much about therapy itself; it’s about finding the missing links. If history were written by INFJs, it would spark revolutions.
Not sure about praising part. While I thought I was INTP, it was all privilege and compliments anywhere I turned online, for "my" type. And felt quite good about my self.
When I realized I'm INFJ, and watched a lot more videos of that type, I started feeling a lot more criticized and "hated", not constantly complimented and praised like INTP's are mostly. (With some ethereal woo woo compliments for the INFJ side here and there I could never take fully seriously)
Generally being in online MBTI communities, I felt a lot more privileged, special and welcomed while I was in INTP land. After transitioning to INFJ, there was a noticeable lowering of self esteem from the standpoint of how my type is talked about and how I felt about it.
Which in turn made me observe, when it comes to being the true snowflakes of the MBTI world, and getting mostly praise (even hidden in criticism), it's really the NT's, especially xNTP's. Where even the weaknesses are laughed off as just cute and funny or quirky, so they get the best of both worlds.
@@Bobby_101 Very interesting (though sorry to hear you went through that). You’re right about INTx and maybe the word “praise” is not quite right. I think the “love” that INFJs receive is often, paradoxically enough, predicated on the notion of INFJs not thinking too highly of themselves. It’s very complex and I’ll have to mull this over further.
@@RensRoom It's all good, the INFJ identification is mostly an online phenomena, and not taken too deep into real life for me.
I'd add, the main reason for most of the criticism we get is obvious, it's other types being annoyed with the "INFJ is so rare" rhetoric, so we get a slightly irrational level of some people trying to put us down at certain places. Also a bit of crabs in the bucket phenomena, not to let us feel to special. Which is to be expected, no matter which type would have turned out the rarest.
I'd say INTJ being rare Ni dom gets some of this type of criticism too.. it bleeds over to them as well, but the other NT's are safe from it.
Perhaps you should step outside your psychoanalysis bubble for a while, and realize that it's not reality. While people, for some reason, always tend to trust me with their problems really quickly and confide in me. Without me even offering it, which can be frustrating, since I usually don't want to tell them off; though that's has to change. It's also true that an INFJ's malleable external personality proves rich ground for shadow projection of unkind people.
My experience in Germany has been, that that very often leads to bullying and ostracization. I'm mostly over that now, but just as some people do trust INFJ's easily, some people take the exact opposite route. As with the personality itself - a potpourri of paradoxes - so it is with other's reacting to our personality. Maybe it's different for those who actually delve into Jungian Psychology, but I can tell you that most people out there have no idea what an INFJ even is, let alone are gonna ask how to meet more of them.
My point exactly.
100%. Most people in the world aren't even aware of MBTI, or even psychological types.
@@muemmel20 he is speaking in regards to the MBTI community at large.
Consistent bullying and manipulation will inevitably awaken the Si demon, either erupting into a supernova or manifesting as a shadow integration. It’s hard to envision any INFJ enduring prolonged abuse without a major eruption or a meticulously calculated manipulation that dismantles their opponent piece by piece. Perhaps this is the unconscious allure dark psyches feel toward INFJs-deep down, they crave submission and corruption, mirroring the wounds they themselves endured in childhood.
@@tg_5565 Yes, though it’s true that I didn’t make that completely clear in the video. I think the mbti community is revealing of a more widespread phenomenon that does not conceptualise things in terms of types.
For any craft or skill, the person who is naturally gifted in that arena will be preferred
The grass is always greener on the other side. Plenty of negatives to go with the positives. As with any type.
What I'm genuinely anxious about recently is that we might become so likeable that people will become addicted to us like a drug and that we might make them suffer a lot when we need alone time or when we aren't present for them. Becoming a great and irrepleacible support for them might actually do them a disservice.
Now I'm starting to question whether it's a good idea to be a good person if you become so appreciated that you become a problem in people's lives. Is it ok to give the best of you for others if that means they'll stick to you like glue and won't try to take their independance?
I usually consider people capable to take their own decisions but being very nice seem to encourage people to become dependent. When you want the best for others, is it really the best that you offer to others?
What if INFJs are very good for any projections? What INFJs could do to show more who they really are for not allowing place for projections?
What if is all projections?
@@obidavekenobe It could be projections on both sides, but I think that that is correct that INFJs (many, not all) are more hiding themselves that gives more place for projections. May be this is their tactics for be more loved? :D
I’m surprised by this. My experience is not this.
This should be good...
Do you think there is any link between Turbulent/Assertive INFJ and your 4 subtypes?
@@Coneman3 I’d say being high in Assertiveness is probably correlated to the Secure INFJ. Compliant and Solipsistic would be less Assertive overall.
"I am the light of the world!"
It sounds like he’s describing an INFP😂!
People 'wanting' to be INFJ is so weird to me. That being said, we need our own holiday to celebrate.
im pretty hated.