Why Ignoring Your Ex Is So Powerful
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- Опубликовано: 23 июл 2024
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The No Contact Rule:
- Reactance
- 60% Of Exes Won't Reach Out
The Big Misconception = Ignoring Is The Powerful Part
The Real Powerful Part = How You Use Your Time
Why We Think Ignoring Is So Effective
"Creates a stable environment"
" Taps Into The Grass Is Greener Syndrome" 
Хобби
I don’t want her back. I want peace
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@@monican250 no
@@_VRGZ_ then you still go out and find one of us again???
Not interested in guys. But I assume this advice goes well for ignoring your ex girlfriend
Me too..i don't want him again..i want partner in life..not a user
It may or may not get her back but at least you'll have your dignity.
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Not true. There is always a reason to be an ex!
its all about self respect
During the no contact rule, i binge watch Chris’s videos.
Did it work for you?
@@_1Brick1_ i am doing indefinite NC. that means no initiate contact, no stalking. Then ex is the one making conversations. But i realized that my ex is still on the rebound for 4 months now and there’s no sense on conversing coz it will lead to nothing. Meanwhile, im focusing on myself and even tried dating. My dating partner is fully aware of the situation between me and my ex and my new date understands about it and willingly wants to be with me for the time being. Just be honest with your new partner about ur ex’s sudden messages.
Me too 😒
Try watching a channel called The Art of Love by Lucia. Its also an informative channel
This is exactly what I’m doing , & it makes perfect sense. My ex is my ex husband. Let him see what he’s got is not better. If it is . I’m ready to let go.
If she goes out and tries to find better let her keep going I look at it this way..... if I was too much go find less
Ignoring gave a powerful effect that change your life.. You take control of your life. That matter most.. Days passed, you getting better until at last she was forgotten for good. You won't remember even her phone no
Knowing how hard NC would feel for me, I sat down on day one and planned out the month. I scheduled out 30 super busy full days of personal goals, planning for a possible future alone, hobbies, and some bucket list items. Write it out in a planner and fill each hour. If you can spend time with friends or family, schedule that too. Pay close attention to the bucket list, because a ton of photo ops happen in the bucket list. I also scheduled time for meditation and cultivating both old and new friendships. In this way, I was able to blow past the 30 days, totally forgot I was doing NC and go straight through to 45. Bonus, if there’s a rebound or 3rd party happening, then when you finish a longer no contact you look like a new friend instead of an old one and then that smug take your man chick does a lot of the heavy lifting for you.
+2349055574121
have you got him back?
It's took him 5 months and I told him I was not interested anymore. 💪
So happy for you, this is the goal
I just came here to say thanks it works last 21 August I just started this NC rule and he text me in 23 sep but I don't need him again whereever he want to go idc but Always my best wishes for him but don't want him back because i have healed thank God from this still have scar but it will heal too he is add with me everywhere but idc about him now.
Lucky you I wish that was me it's almost eight months and he hasn't contacted me he keeps my pictures on his Instagram but will not talk to me or anyting
@@ginawelch6532 why would you want him to?? why are you waiting around ??
@@3sydE007 , bc she still has feelings for him
@@tre_4i know, i was trying to open her eyes
I don't understand why people are looking for ways to get their ex back. They are an ex for a REASON. Wether they broke up with you or you broke up with them. This is unhealthy.
I really find it so silly when people like you Copy expressions, saying they are an ex for a reason. Everything in life is for a reason. You eat for a reason, work for a reason. Wash for a reason, play for a reason. Talk for a reason.Everything in this world is for a reason. Please stop copying the masses.
People can change especially with time.
I think so too. They more than likely aren't thinking about you. They moved on and you've been left behind in something that doesn't exist anymore.
Stupid comment 😂
Nice recycle of an overused expression.
I’m not calling and I feel better about myself. I admit, I do have moments. Overall, I’m committed to my healing. She told me she was talking to her ex and they’ve been emailing and texting off and on for the last few years. They’ve talked a couple of times, but there’s nothing going on. I’m screaming BS.
Definitely BS
I'm in the same situation , my boyfriend of 6 years cheated on me a week after he told me it was over , moved in with her he had a drink problem which caused problems in our relationship , for a year he has lived half hour from me , he says I never understood him ie the drink ,she understands him and buys him wine beer , the drink problem caused me when we were living to together , Evan slept rough , thought it make he realize he had a problem but it didn't help , all I ever did was love and try to help him , I'm devastated by the whole situation ,and I'm made to look like it was me .I'm doing no contact
If the guy is an alcoholic, that is a very legitimate reason to break up with him. I’m saying that as an alcoholic myself, so I kind of get where both you and him are coming from. No one can help him with his problem unless he makes up his mind on his own that he needs to quit, and he finds the inner strength to stick with that. Move on and assume he won’t. You’ll be saving yourself a lifetime of heartache, possible abuse, and will be protecting your future children from some dark times they’ll never forget. As much as you may love this guy now, you’ll find someone else who will treat you much better in the long run, and who will be a much better role model for your children.
Can you do a video on a cheating Ex who wants you but the struggles with their narcissistic ways?
You sound like you had some experience with a narc .
Great video..my ex sent me this:
I thought a lot about us overnight. As you can probably tell, I am feeling so much pressure and that includes with you, whether intentional or otherwise. I really hate doing this, as I had hoped to have the weekend to get some space, but with your messages this morning I dont think I made myself clear. I am really struggling to connect at the moment with you and im not sure I am feeling what I should do with us or that I see a future. I need to focus just on coming home. I hope you understand that I have enjoyed our time together but just need to brings things to an end. I am really sorry.
Currently on day 16 on NC rule. Had a couple of tough days and nights. Working on myself & by ignoring her. We dated for a month..so hoping with time she realises what she let go of.
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What happened sam?
What happened?
Gets confusing..ignoring vs. No contact. Let the dumper be the one to reach out. Then a subtle good jesture, casual speaking months later...then 6+ months later throw out a lets get coffee after a text or 2 and not have high expectations
I am in second no contact. It has been 22 days. I went into it after something that happened even though we are technically ok. He hasn't done what I said to do yet even though he said he would with time and I know it is because he doesn't trust me and there's this new person he's been seeing for 4 months now and they weren't meant to be together and while it's long-distance and they don't meet due to the pandemic, I want him to realize that the way he has acted shows he still loves me deep down. We were committed and he said we broke up for different reasons and I really just want him to chase me. Will the next contact rule truly be successful even when he was cold because he was hurt last time about something, even though it is so small and it makes no sense that he's getting upset over the same things that he would when we were together?
Thank you Doncic
I used believe i see him with her,I won't fight for him but now I'm ignoring him and won't respond to his messages and to not win him or make him regret is more i won't let him close enough to hurt me.
How is it going??!
Why waste time on an Ex, Why?
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@@monican250 hi Monica
When someone decides to go it means they had intentions of a better life away from you. If they return it means they failed. You are human not an option. Send her back to her other options and move on. Taking back exes is like putting rough salt in a open wound. KNOW YOUR WORTH AND BE WITH A LOYAL PERSON WHO VALUES YOU WITHOUT BETRAYING YOU.
My ex left me to flirt with others dudes. That was 10 years ago. She been trying to get a hold of me over the years, she became friends with my so so friends. Just to get to me, which it didn't work at all, because all i did is just ignore her and be rude towards her. She still this day try to get a hold of me. She also have a bf
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She wants you as one of her orbiters. Attention is like a drug on women, starve the beast.
You‘re a great coach
Thanks
Great stuff. X
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What happens if during NC he reaches out a couple of times asking what happened and I answered some of the times in the beginning but I always let the conversation fade, and after one day he was texting me non-important things and I didn't respond, and then he blocks me (for attention)?
I think he has anxious attachment style
Yea he’s hurt that’s why he blocked you. He’s trying to forget you by blocking you. That’s what I did. I guess you can say I was in a similar situation as your ex. He still misses you. But since you act like you don’t care whether you do or don’t he feels he has no choice but to move on
I thought being in no contact for almost 2 mos will help me get over him but NO! uugghhh I wanna get over him.
Maybe consider dating casually if you want to get over him.
How has it been going ? Are u okay now ?
😅 my ex just verbally told me that I am not allowed to not talk to her.
What type of shh.... is that 😅.
She broke up with me and I'm forced to talk with her for eternity 😅
I asked him...during a conversation
Would u rather be left alone??
He said ....YES!!!
I'm like a damn "genie in a bottle" hahahahaha!!!!
Boom!!!! Done!!!!
Blocked him on EVERYTHING!!!
He got the last word and it was to leave him alone.
Ok...u get what u asked for.
It hurts...very very bad!
But I love myself more that I will NOT ALLOW him to treat me like some booty call or just some other girl.
To be continued........
Well i have to find the same courage as you... 👍🏼.. best wishes..stay strong
@@kaifianaaz9986
U have to find it in yourself.
Love and respect yourself and THINGS LIKE this....will just happen.
He has called me every day even I've blocked him( even tho he is blocked o can still he is making an attempt to reach out)
He knows he messed up BIG.....I dont be playing.
We'll see what happens.
Love yourself girrrllll!! You're worth it
@@ginafromdabronx9333 what ended up happening ?
I left him alone. I'm moving on.....I found a focus point. I'm focusing on my business!!! When he comes back I hope he has developed new healthy habits and become 100% MATURE MAN. And if he doesn't come back..its ok. I'm ok with it. I have to be.....(I have found peace & tranquility w/out him and it's really nice). I still love him BUT....my self love is way larger than my love towards him.
Yes. Self dignity and self love is more important.
What about if your working together?
I'm ignoring his texts because it would be small talk and I would like to move on.
Hey Chris....hope this comment is seen but generally speaking....after my ex wanted to run away from the emotional damage we both did. I have been in no contact for 7 weeks after pleading but not begging. Should I reach out or keep no contacting going?
I’m in the same situation as you but only about 5 weeks
Orange Peel do you plan on reaching out soon?
Edward S. Probably not I’ve been self improving and doing much better without her, she just started stalking my stories on Snapchat and Instagram so pretty sure she misses me, idk if yours does too? but if she doesn’t come back oh well it’s no biggie her loss
I reached out after 30 days and it didn't go too well. She was mad and cursing and yelling. Little by little she calmed down. She even spent the night over a few days later. We are talking but not about getting back together, she isn't ready yet. I regret it and should have stayed in no contact for life.
DONT reach out!! If she didn’t do it first she is not ready, so all the progress you’ve done all the effort you’ve put in during those weeks will be gone. Let her come back to you, if she hasn’t she is simply not ready yet!
I have no hope anymore... I'm just so heartbroken and i don't know how much i still got in me man..
I’m in the same situation,don’t give up tho come on we got this 💪🏼
George Smith stop scamming people
@@soldierofgod349 Just report their annoying ass
ꜱᴀᴍᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴅᴜᴅᴇ 💔...ꜱᴏ ᴩɪꜱꜱᴇᴅ ᴏꜰꜰ
Me too .. Just found out he alr hve new gf ths morning..
Great bro
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Day 1: of ignoring him we broke up on good terms by the way he was an amazing Boyfriend he just needed to take time to work on himself. I’ll be back in 3days
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Did you sort things out with him
Update?
How is it going ? Are u over him ? Does time work?
And I want nothing to do with Her she's even had her so called cousin which honestly is the guy she's really sleeping with I'm not stupid keep bugging me so as of yesterday I had to tell him to stop talking to me leave me alone but how do I turn on deal with this in a better way is honestly I've only been in one relationship real life it's this woman in a 1 and move on but I have trouble doing it can you help me
But should I leave him on read or delivered 😭😭😭😭
Hey Chris my ex girlfriend return on Snapchat at November 2020 then she read my text and haven’t texted back, she unfriend me on Snapchat what should I do ?!!
+1 7 6 0 7 0 1 3 0 4 7.
I did it and exactly a month later he knocked . however he started to make logical reason to knock me and the time of meeting, he seems vulnerable about his breaking up part. been months, now it's been a coupld of days since he didn't knock. meantime I didn't either. what does it mean?
can I contact through email? or any social media?
It means he did it out of ego. He just wants your attention. If he truly loved you, he would get you back.
He had the audacity to text me 3 months after dumping me he proubly tired of being alone again
This is the BEST advice. My ex and I broke up 6 yrs ago. I was pretty much forced to just move on bc I do have self-worth. Did it hurt? HELL YES it did. But I got some good therapy to work through it and all is good. I can see things much more clearly. Recently this ex has tried EVERY POSSIBLE WAY he can think of to contact me. I absolutely will never respond. I'm over it and he doesn't deserve my attention. The funny thing is- bc my behavior changed, he refuses to give up. I thought after the first couple tries he would stop. Its been over a month and he still attempts several times a week. He would have never acted like this during our relationship.
Maybe, He Really Want You Back.
@@tre_4 no. I found out he broke up with someone so he was trying to get to me to help get over her. he just was looking for a rebound.
@@16thsecond64 , thats messed up.
@@16thsecond64 yes,exactly they come to exes when they have problems, not happy,not because of us. But do you really think that if you reject him and he really wants you, will give up on trying to get you? Mine tried to make me I to contact him, to write to him but i refused and after some days he gave up. Even didn't write,just appeared 3 days all day and night online on social media, he wanted to show me that he has some interest but didn't WRITE, just showed up online mood on Skype. And I didn't write of course,if he can be onljne at 3am,5 am in hope Me to be one to reach but he not doing this this shows he is not that interested. Now he doesn't go online and I am back to away modeon Skype but he knows i am there. Csn you say whst did he do ? Sorry for the long post
@@sofiandi6117 What did he do?
Idk why we ended to be honest. I just decided he found someone else. Took a while but I moved on.
Recently, I found out that he supposedly has changed and ‘now’ appreciates what he had in me. All due to a break-up he had w a girl. She did a lot to him. I guess there’s Karma or something similar. 🤷♀️
I'm serious with this question its not a joke .
What do I do if my ex contacts me after 3 months. If they reminded me to uninsure my car . To get my dog who they were very close with to get their booster shots. And finally
" and oh happy anniversary "
Take care.
I dont want them back. This really hurts but we both need to move on. It was a toxic relationship 😪 that hurt us both very very much even though there was an unhealthy love deep down.
Do I ignore- risk more contact
Message - say what?
Anyone? What do you think
ignore them and forget about it. Move on and improve your life in the meantime
Driving by your house or work and making it obvious.
Does it work if you were the dumper?
My ex keep trying to kind of start a conversation, for exemple she sends me pictures of the food she cooker that she knows I like, she keeps sending me videos of animals or funny videos, and when I put a picture without a shirt on social media she went mad and she asked me why am i doing that.. What do you guys think about this do you think she wants come back with me even when she keeps saying she doesn't want me
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I hope everything have worked out for you. With or without her.
I think for those who NC worked for, don't necessarily come back and inform you.
Amazing video, absolutely love it. I was married with a Chinese who cheated and was with another man because I couldn't see her due to the virus not allowing me to fly. I was crazy in love and did the world for this woman. The first 2 weeks of me finding out I was pleading with her. I didn't want to live. She kept contacting me and I kept replying. Then she found out I was going back to the same country where she is. She made plans saying she wanted to meet and stay with me for 4 days per week. I asked are you still with the guy. She said yes but she wants to see me and see if I am better. I laughed. She contacted me every other day. This was for months. Then I began to understand myself and knew that I never do competition over a woman. At that point I replied with a last message and said bye. She has tried to contact me now everyday for 2 months. But I no longer have any feeling in me. Normally my blood would begin to get warm. And my heart would beat. Now nothing. I never thought this would happen. She is dead in my eyes now. I love deep and equally dislike deep when someone is an untrusted traitor.. oh and the new guy is also married with a kid, which she didn't know at the time. Both worthless people. Iam shocked that I am over her. It was easy I just think of what she does with her body with that man. I would never use old bath water.
He cheated on me and still talks with the girl even though the girl knows my ex was the one who cheated.
He actually used gaslighting and victim card and told the girl I was the one who cheated.
I blocked him in ig and twitter but not yet on fb because he's deactivated.
I'm still blinded and inlove with him but over time, I'll be able to move forward without him.
It hurts since we stayed together
Do not loose hope, becuz all hope is not lost
Don't worry dear.
.
Dear Hannah, I am writing something for you. I know you feel devastated that he cheated on you & played himself as the victim. Please please just don't think about getting him back. He did not deserve you. You are worth more. Trust me, you'll realize with time that it was the best decision you ever made. Leave him for the girl he said he doesn't talk to.
Trust me!! The cheater is never in peace(psychology), one day he'll realize(maybe some months), and come to say sorry. But please don't take him back then. You gotta take care of yourself babygirl. You still gonna shine without him. Focus on yourself. Boys like him only know to put women down.
I know your pain. This is some advice I wish someone had given me before. Although IDK if I should be saying all this to you. It will take some time for you to fall back, but once you're out, you'll feel a wonderful type of freedom.
Much love.
@@Simran-bl4us thank you so much 🥺😭
I am struggling. I am afraid of actually accepting him IF HE actually comes back.
I'm at the position where I'm afraid of letting go, but I know I deserve better 😭
It's too painful but this too shall pass. Thank you so much for your concern and message ☺️☺️☺️
@@hannahgracerosas6655 I'm going through the same honey... we're in the same situation... so i can completely empathize wth u dear... Hope this passes away soon for both of us ..
its all about self respect
Was in n c the next day after he damped me..18 days later he breadcrumb ed me n I was okey myself so I said no...I'm day 2 into no contact n my emotions r everywere🙆
I’m about to block him
I thought about it also. I unfriended and since she stalks my page she knew right away that I did and sent me 3 long nasty texts messages saying I can unfriend her all I want but it doesn't change the fact that I ain't shit and how terrible I am, yada yada yada. When she's the one that broke up with me. I didn't do it out of spite, I just did it because I'm trying to get over her and don't want to see what she's doing. She can look at mine all she wants, I just don't want to look at hers.
The music doesn´t help. But I guess it´s a requirement for most people?
I don’t want her back it’s been 13 years I really want myself back
☝️☝️☝️☝️
Thank you once again for your genuine help, my marriage has been restored and working perfectly.
My relationship break in middle of August
@Joo Won I have try that there the system won’t get through
@Joo Won I try that is say message sent to invalid destination. Please check my number and try again
Is it really ignoring them if they aren’t reaching out to you anyway?
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So what if there doing the same ?
That's a proper final breakup I'm afraid
We are ignoring each other more than 4 months now what to do?
Hows it going now
Yes 7 months now we guys still ignoring each other and we have feelings for each other
Nah, if your ex touches someone else after the breakup its over for good
does this include not doing their social media stories?!? where they can tell if you viewed them or not!
I’ve been doing no contact for 40 days and I haven’t heard a damn thing from my ex girlfriend!
Now I still view her stories and she still views mine I’m guessing I should continue no contact and not you her social media?
Your videos are giving me false hopes... I know he's not gonna come... It's alrdy been 24days Chris 😔
@@koyesjuile4867 no thnks dear ... Whatever is written in my Destiny will happen.. nobody can help me . If he still loves me, he will come or else, I'll accept he was never mine😣
24days is not much! Don't listen to the 30days bs! It all depends on the context, because it may take more than just 30 days. Even on his site he says "up to 3 months". Just work on yourself, love yourself and live a happy life with or without your ex! For me it's just day 10, but I'm slowly getting there.
Normally it takes 45 before it actually begins
24 days isn't alot. Ex's even come back after years
Leave your exes alone.
This no contact rule is been for 13 months
Call me private all the sudden and lives with a girl explain that to me cause no everyone situation is the same
I ignored the crap out of her for 40 years....So far... So Good...
Don’t answer hi hey what’s up. Ur dumped they have to say something important period.
I don’t want him back unless he’s accepted Christ as His Lord and Saviour
Do you, ignore a cheating ex, in the same way?
My ex cheated and she loves me and desires a child and a future.
Her time is expiring looks wise and potentially within her ability to have a child, she's 32.
I'm over the fact she admitted cheating one time, I know there's more times, but I'm struggling to accept her back after she doesn't show any fight.
So I'm going to ride no contact until I'm over her completely.
I'm just anticipating her reaching out again, btw she tried two times, but one was a lame txt to explain why she was mad after an argument and to see if I was ok, then I git a missed call two days later.
It's day 6 and I'm getting better everyday.
To be honest, she's not even all that, I just learned to love everything about her and all her imperfections
That fact that she cheated show that's she doesn't love you. You are just her safety net (a provider) as she needs someone to finance her lifestyle. Grow some balls and ditch her. Get your self respect back.
Not when he slept around with tons of women whilst being in a committed relationship with me!
These female no good now days that'd sad when they no you love them but they still leave you that' kind of slow to me
Why do you want to be miserable all over again... 😂
More like why are you talking to me when you have her? Wasn't she so great? Yea shut up I don't want to hear from you dude.
No wonder your viewers are so less. Half of video is gone and you are talking irrelevant and dragging same lines repeatedly.
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Ignoring is Just rude, there are other ways
☝️☝️☝️☝️
Thank you once again for your genuine help, my marriage has been restored and working perfectly.