What "disappearing for a year" actually looks like
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
- “If you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it’s not because they enjoy solitude. It’s because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.” -Jodi Picoult
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a simple mindset change is all you need to go from "being alone :( "to "being alone :)".
@Benny good luck bro. mental health is everything
or "being alone (:
@@flippa_da_boss9998 tRUE
Since the last time I watched your video and read this comment and every time when I had to be lonely I was thinking of this comment. And it’s not simple to go from “:(“ to “:)” because it really matters how you initially react up on that “being lonely” thing. If it’s because you want attention that can grow into unhealthy habits of avoiding communication with other people because you might will feel unsafe every time you trying to approach them. I think it’s really important to start out all of that loneliness journey only because your REALLY need that not because of your whimsical character that decided he is not the one who is approached.
i dont wanna undermine your comment but i honestly believe the difference can be boiled down to “how is your mental health?”. if u take two people, one with good and one with bad mental health and u locked them in a room, if nothing else is different about them except mental health, we already know whos gonna be fine and who might kill themselves.
of course im saying this from my perspective, so it might not apply to you, but i truly believe if someone spends a month levelling up their mental health they’ll be far more fulfilled being alone. as i said in the video, i used to cry so often when surrounded by people all day. as im typing this comment, i havent talked to my friends in months and i feel the most fulfilled i ever have. nothing changed within that period of time from me crying everyday to me being completely fine except mental health. hopefully this makes sense, i kinda just restated what i said in the video but yeah i can understand ur comment. take everything i say with a pinch of salt cuz it may not apply to u but when it comes to mental health im like very certain its universal.
"Stop texting first and see how many dead plants you've been watering" -- this is honestly the best piece of advice I've heard in awhile
This is so true…
Loneliness has been the biggest factor of my depression. Even getting a notification means a lot to me, i would grab my phone and check if someone’s texted me (hope someone would do this whenever i text them) but no it was just that one fricking class group which your teacher won’t stop posting shit.
Bars!!
Fr especially with girls
I did that after getting in some harsh breakup and soon enough i was completely alone. From an extrovert to a complete loner. Just today im having a hard realization of how little energy i give to people now. My sister is invited to a wedding of a friend that she met through me...and im left out. Its harsh but i deserve it for not being social anymore...
No worse feeling than feeling lonely with other people. There is a fine line between being "lonely" and being "alone".
I am alone but i don't feel lonely cut everyone off everyone 7 months ago never felt better delete all socials all of that it's awesome
@@hemmers865ry going back to it… to see if you’ve really made much change…
maybe not that now… but eventually…
@@hemmers865 youtube is social media tho
I used to be upset when im alone and lonely. Now I get upset when im with people
It is always better to be alone than to be with people who make u feel alone
Feeling alone isn't about not having anyone, it's when you feel that nobody has you.
bars.
I don't believe we need to cut people out of our lives, we just need to learn to stop holding ties that are making our hands bleed, we need to stop forcing things, and understand that the commitment of a relationship, be it a friendship or a romance, must come from both sides. I really appreciate your content, nice work.
ye, its the level of unhealthy attachment in the first place that makes you need to cut people out of your lives. always be evaluating and reaffirming your relationships with people, dont just be clueless about what everyone thinks.
This is what cutting off is
You see there's no response from them without you, you stop forcing things, you don't let them force things
Cutting people out because they don't care about your 3000 calorie bulk is kinda cringe ngl
😱
Man thank you for making this video. I love your sense of humor and like the way you talk. very entertaining. I know what it's like to be alone. At one point in my life I was alone for a couple months, without seeing anybody because I felt like my friends dont give a shit about me. I'm actually pretty much always alone, but one of my old friend wanted to visit me just a couple days ago and wanted to stay in my house for a while. And we haven't done almost anything together, he's just on his phone scrolling on TikTok all-day like LITERALLY all damn day. When I ask him wether he wants to do some activities with me, he just says "no I'm tired". I can't deal with that shit, thankfully he leaves tomorrow and I can start working on my own stuff again. Like the whole week he's been here, he's just laid on my couch and scrolled on TikTok and smoked weed. I just can't wrap my mind around on how some people can actually live this way. This video reminded me that I really need to cut these people out of my life, cause they literally bring no positivity into my life and are just an obstacle to my goals.
I subscribed and liked, I got actually inspired by this video and im probably going to make this kind of video in the future on my channel aswell :)
thanks bro. when we grow, it is inevitable that we outgrow our friends. we outgrow people who aren’t growing. kinda sad but thats life 🤷♂️
Jesus loves you guysq
Felt that
@@Yuki-qs5mt wish I did too
May be he is dealing with something mentally, if he is not bothering you just leave him a lone
This video came at the right time. I’m currently feeling like I’m at that mid point after cutting people off and being angry at myself because I can’t get her to text back or have many friends. I’ve started working out wanting to cut weight and build muscle. I want to get financially stable and get more comfortable with myself so I can get out and be social. This video is perfect and hit every note I needed to hear. A much healthier outlook to a way to handle my goals. Time to hit that grind.
If you think making more money will make you more social, just look at Mark Zuckerberg. One of the richest and most awkward man on this planet. People will flock to you when you have money, that has nothing to do with your self improvement. True friends stick with you regardless of what's in your bank account.
i'm in the exact same place except with a guy :/ he got bored of me because i stopped sending him stuff and it sucks, but i'm tryna move on. i wish you the best of luck
@@esraakin3275 you stopped sending him messages or stopped sending him “stuff”? Those paint two very different pictures as to why you stopped talking
@@nharli_etc i messaged him multiple times daily and would send paragraphs about my love for him, but i'd get replies like 'ok cool lol, can i get a selfie?' - i've replaced the actual word with selfie but i think you can assume what 'stuff' is.
@@esraakin3275 I gotcha. Yeah I take it he wasn’t in it for the same reason you were in then. Its always tough when you don’t get the same feelings back you’re putting out. Been there…
Nice content bro! I was never the “popular” guy in school either. I wasn’t even in a club. I just blended in like a tiger in tall grass. When I was separated from my peers during the pandemic, (conveniently) my whole life changed. The difference between being a follower and a lone wolf is immense. The newfound respect I have for myself after beginning self improvement is the best thing that could’ve happened to me. Much love for sharing. 💯
W very based adonis
God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him won’t perish but will have eternal life.g
@@Yuki-qs5mt facts homie
still, u were a TIGER in a tall grass
@@Yuki-qs5mt 🙏❤️🙏
You hit the nail on the head when you said "Oh I'm already invisible, so I might as well disappear," because that's exactly how I felt the moment I cut out lots of friends. why bother showing up when they don't even care about our presence in the first place. But on the flip side, I know my family has always been my greatest support system and is always available whenever I feel down. That's why I stopped investing in my friends, and investing in my family instead. I disappeared from my social circle to be more present for my family. Be present for those who really care about you.
this is so relatable WHAT 😭 i know i'm well known in school, i'm actually with the top students, active on social media and circles and everything... but something just hit me that nobody actually sees me and it hurted me. even though i have the privileges i still feel like im invisible. that's when I realized that i was people-pleasing my whole life, and it broke me that nobody actually cares about me. i delete all my social medias except youtube. i also isolate myself from my "friends" that don't actually think of me as such. it's lonely at first, but eventually i found peace on it. i tried to go back but man, i could not even look at instagram for hours like I used to. i have found hobbies that i didn't think i would enjoy. i appreciate myself more and built my self esteem from dust. i don't hold anyone's standards especially beauty as a girl who needs to be presentable all the time in my previous lifestyle. i can formulate my own opinions and don't let one's get to me. this so cringe but yeah there's more to life than the internet. it took me 2 years though but i think it's worth it
ok rant is over, scroll ahead
You seem like a chill person. It don’t make sense how people wouldn’t respond to you, it’s crazy how the world works. What helped me was to focus on things that I like doing that kept my mind off negatives thoughts like those. You’re off to a great first impression and I’m excited to see the videos that you have saved for the future:)
thanks :)
we live in a judgemental society
Jesus loves you 🙏s
Ngl I know I'm old to this but using hobbies as an escape from problems is pretty bad.
Idk where I got this from, maybe it was even this channel but it was about how instead of thinking and dealing with those problems directly, you watch youtube, play video games and masturbate in order to never deal with them and move on. It's like an unhealthy coping mechanism. Like when I used to stress eat a lot, I could control my anger more because I knew later I would just eat myself till I felt sleepy and watched youtube till I fell asleep.
I get angrier more now but I don't take it out as much. I keep calm completely even if I start seeing red.
@@putent9623 See that’s your issue. You see it as an escape from your problems instead of an open door to new opportunities. No matter what you do, that negative connotation you have towards the things you like doing will always keep those problems connected. Don’t reward yourself for things that go wrong, this will cause bad habits. Instead try to see things from an objective point of view. Ask yourself things like, “What was the problem and was I in control of it?” If you are in control, then why stress? You have the ability to make the change. Same thing goes for if you’re not in control, why stress? It’s out of your control, their for you have no fault in what went wrong. Instead see how you can put yourself in the best position of the situation you’re in. It’s good that you watch videos like this, since it shows that you’re open to change, now you just need to find the drive for you and you’ll see great things starting to come forth. All the best to you.
That “YOU DON’T KNOW ME SON! YOU DON’T KNOW ME SON!” Had me dying 😂
I love what you’re doing here keep it up
"the love i didn't get from others can be given to me by me" thank you for sharing that.
I think I needed to hear that so honestly thank you
I also feel invisible but it's nice to know there are other people who feel the same way.
I disappered for 13 years when I flew from Philippines to US and started working @ 20. made no friends, always angry at work, friends back home are all married now and my old flame has a baby now. It broke me inside and had multiple emotional breakdowns.
Got laid off from covid, got even more depressed and did nothing for 3 years. Now @ 33, got hired back and in a better work environment and completely changed my outlook. Now it felt like making up for lost time and starting over again and have goals for myself.
Great man. Won't comment anything because your work is already self explanitory.
“The love I never felt from other people can be given to me by me.” This spoke to me.
I absolutely love your point of view on being "invisible" or "alone". This video seriously helped me. Self respect is important for mental health. I have gotten so desperate for people that I would surround myself with people who had no respect for me. This video has opened my eyes to the problems of this.
Can't wait to get going on my road of self-improvement.
Amazing video, thanks bro
thank u bro. take care of yourself man
Jesus loves you guysx
Not going to lie, this helped me a bunch. Granted, my experience is a bit different. I decided to take a gap year after high school but no one tells how crippling the loneliness gets. In high school, you see your friends and classmates every day. Now, nobody texts on the group chat. It feels like my time is stagnant. To be honest, I’m still trying to learn to prioritize, be confident and care about myself. But seeing this video definitely felt reassuring. Thanks
I was in the same boat, friend. Everyone else goes on with their lives but those of us who take a gap year feel stuck in the limbo between the security of what we used to know and the uncertainty of what lays ahead. For me, that feeling never went away in my gap year. Two years into college now, and it's slowly starting to go away, stay strong. Building a new community takes time.
Become independent
Same story here , my friends used to talk to me a lot but after college they just vanished like they didn't even care in the first place , now I'm alone with only one school friend that only i believe to be an actual friend.
I used to isolate my self and work on myself for about 2 years from when I was 13 to 15 because trauma that my family and friends inflicted I was so insecure that I did not want anyone to see my face.. I wanted to dissappear.. and naturally I started to have alot of free time so I started working on myself.. working out and doing things that I'm passionate about.. making music.. the only thing that motivated me to continue for so long was my hatred for the way that people treated me .. now that I'm going outside more I taught.. people would respect me.. I'm decent looking... but it's quite the opposite.. and that is because I used to be a negative person and had a negative mindset.. wich made me start pushing people away more.. but now that I realized that I started changing.. now I can successfully say I have a couple of friends that truly fuck with me And a girlfriend that fucks me 👍
Honestly what people don’t realize is that when you have the pain coming from both family and friends it makes you feel like nobody wants you around anywhere. I’m still in the stage where I’m learning to respect myself bc I stopped doing it a long time ago when others stopped as well. I lost over 100lbs in the process and have really bad anxiety and depression, I’m kinda looking for my next step on how to improve myself.
Cuck
@@swety2962 touch grass
proud of you bro ❤
Kudos to you dude
It's so draining to feel lonely when I am around my 'friends'. Sometimes I would say to myself that "it's just in ur head and they really do care" or "They have their own lives to live too so it's okay if they don't reply back." But in the end, I realized that they just don't care as much as I do.
I'm an extroverted person but I do enjoy my time being alone, I mean it doesn't really kill me to not socialize anyways.
the ole, "I was meaning to text you"
this was six months ago but if youre still here... wanna be friends? i have discord ^v^
@@purplemuffin2545 aw
I've recently deleted my last social media account, (aside from RUclips)I just don't feel connected to anyone anymore, after the last person I cared about broke my hearts, I just don't want to be close to anyone else anymore, so let's see how it goes to vanish from my friend groups for a year, I'm just going to focus on myself, I'll tell you all how it was in 2025, if I don't unalive myself due to loneliness within 2024.
The timing of this video is kinda coincidental. I was a very loud and proud positive guy who saw everyone as a friend. But a few months ago, I had a realisation that I’ve made myself look like an idiot, weirdo, creep and other things to everyone at school and that nobody takes me seriously or even sees me as a friend. Since then I’ve become rather quiet and reserved, never initiating a conversation, never laughing at anyone’s jokes, and only looking at every person I interact with as negatively as possible. But I made a promise to myself that I’ll bounce back, be friends with good people and become a better person, to become someone reliable and be recognised for the person I can be
Good on you bud!
keep going, and trust yourself
have a good day :)
Its good to go to the extremes because then you can finetune yourself to be where you wanna
damn u just gave me the realization that i look like an idiot and weirdo, i wont see everything as negative as u did but i definitely have to change
felt this one so hard. we'll get there.
It's comforting to know that my issue wasn't entirely unique. After I came to the conclusion of being invisible I noticed I was becoming more bitter. Thank you for the video, now I just have to figure out how to set myself on the right track
I went through the same shit bro. I really resonated with the things you are saying. At my high school i was like the kid everybody knew. I was always the kind of connection between people. When i walked inside the school everybody was greeting me etc. but when i graduated, i felt that nobody actually gave a shit about me. Only a couple of friend from my local mosque were still there for me. I felt... i don't know how to explain it but i really rethought my hole life again. I actually thought: "How should i interact with people now, that they like me? not really like me, but how to get a deeper kind of connection to people?" and so on. First i thought, that i was too happy and people don't want to be with happy people.. that is literally what i thought lol because i always was the happy, friendly individual who hyped up everybody and was always happy. I actually was happy at that time though. I wasn't giving a fuck who thought what. So i decided to not be happy all the time anymore to get deeper friendships.. The first few month i was just acting not happy (like not smiling much. Just looking at people and let them speak), but then i actually started getting depressed. It wasn't acting anymore from that time on and the most depressing times of my live started. There were weeks or month, where i didn't talked to anybody at all. I was in a foreign country so even my family couldn't help me and i was ashamed at calling them and explaining all of the shit i went through, because they didn't knew me like that. I was depressed and lonely af watching youtube and scrolling through social media the hole day (Thankfully my family was still sending me money, so i could do that without fully fucking up my life) and then.... one day while watching youtube, i came through hamzas videos. He is a self improvement youtuber if you don't know already. And it wouldn't be too far fetched, if i said "He changed my life".. literally. I was in the blink of giving myself the finishing blow. Ok maybe not really because i am kinda religious and i wouldn't do that to myself and my family. But i still had the thoughts to do it, even i knew i would never do something like that. So in the end i started doing self improvement thanks to hamza and my life went only uphill after that. Now i am studying CS at TUM, going to the gym, journaling etc and doing all the self imrovement stuff. Did i finally got friends with really deep connections? No. Do i give a fuck about that. Fuck no. I don't give a shit. I have so many friends now again. I know eventually when we are out of the current envoirenment (uni), they might cut out the connection but i don't give a shit. I will live my life and fullfill my goals and anyone who wants to come along with is welcome. I will not push that matter anymore. Concentrate on the important things and eventually you will come. YOU ALL CAN DO IT KINGS. DON'T GIVE UP! Do the hard work, especially when you don't feel like it :) Cheers
“if you chase butterflies they will fly away. if u build a beautiful garden then they will come”
- idk but i think its relevant to ur story
thanks for sharing bro. Based.
@@ItsMeRuff Yeah this quote actually describes my current situation lol thank you for sharing. And thank you for the video! I really liked how you delivered your story and opinions. Also i know you don't need a random dude in the internet telling you that lol but keep uploading videos bro. I can actually see you making thousands of dollars in merely a few month (money is the driving factore for youtubers most of the time) while also helping thousands of people. So bro. Keep going. And who knows.. maybe we'll meet on the top ;) ..
@@halilsmith8162 every positive comment helps. thanks bro
If anything, sometimes, I would feel lonelier in a room full of people than I would sitting in a room with my own thoughts.
Being alone is a physical state. It is the absence of having anyone around us, it is a moment to dive deep into introspection, rejuvenation and time to discover oneself.
But loneliness, loneliness is an emotion, it is the feeling of being isolated, a gap in your heart, an internal void that can’t even always be filled by the company of others.
So I'm all for being alone. ✨☺
For whoever is lonely: Go climbing/bouldering. Been doing it for a year and a half now and the transformation is pretty cool. Start slow and aim for 2-3 sessions per week and you'll meet a lot of VERY nice people and most places have lots of recurring but also new people weekly. Good thing to maintain social contact without having to commit per se. Lot's of different people too.
although i am a 14 year old girl into self improvement, you sir are incredibly relatable. the whole thing abt feeling like you arent apart of the group when you have so many people around you resonates a lot with me. i am a very social person and i love speaking to people, so it will be really hard to ignore everyone for a while and work on myself. i do text first a lot and i feel like if i dont most of my friends would disappear when i dont want them to. some i dont even have as contacts bc i got my whatsapp taken away a while back (dont even ask lmao). i have gotten somewhat comfortable with being alone but i dont really want to cut anyone off as im still in school and ill have to see them a lot. do you have any advice for this? thanks for making this video, i gained a lot of value from it :)
this is very individual and i dont know all the ins and outs of your situation but the best answer i can give is to ask yourself “does this person respect me and value me?” and if the answer is not a resounding “yes” i would probably cut them off. personally im very strict about it but maybe you could be less strict when it comes to certain people. completely up to you.
as for the whole school thing, i graduated so i dont have this problem so i cant really relate buuuut i have cut people off whilst in school before. i just didnt talk to them in school and its kinda awkward when we walked past each other in the hall or smth but oh well 🤷♂️ if u need to see them a lot then dont cut them out just speak less and less. i fill up my time so i dont have time to speak regardless. that’s like the whole “oh i’ll respond to his text in 10 minutes so it looks like im busy” except ur like… actually busy.
thx for the comment, value urself :)
See them in school,and only in school. And you have the rest of the time to improve on yourself. If you only see them in school,its fine,you get to have a little bit of fun and all that,and its all good no worries. You have the rest of the day to improve yourself. That is it. Live your life normally at school and improve at home.
@@ItsMeRuffur actually soooo kind I rlly agree w ur comment
As a 15 y/o girl who went through a similar experience, I really resonate with this as well. Don’t cut off everyone who does not allow/help you grow, as they may grow too. You never know if you burned a bridge that could’ve turned into a friendship (speaking from my very-small-school experience). Try to be respectful/baseline friendly with everyone- don’t make enemies. It’s easier to befriend people for when you think you’re ready/when the circumstances arise. Take this with a grain of salt thought, as with most advice because it’s not always (fully) applicable; following your gut is honestly the best way I find to achieve a good balance.
16 year old dude and based off this comment we're living parallel lives
Dude I related with you so much when you talked about the social hierarchy thing. I went through a self improvement journey last year during summer and looked better, was demanded by people but only when they dont have others. I've opened up so much here thank you.
value yourself highly and cut out those who don’t value you the same way. thx for the comment bro :)
@@ItsMeRuff dw bro, me and you are so alike i just can't help it but open up
I felt almost personally identified with this video, I also tried to dissappear from everyone (to "improve" my life), i'm also the student council in my school and i don't really feel like a part of it, and i also feel kinda lonely even though A LOT of people interact with me daily, this is a good reflection man, and i realized i don't really want to be alone, i actually just want to put the work all of the projects that i have in my mind really deserve, and in the process if anyone wants to support and/or get along with me it will happen, no need to look for people, just let them come and/or go.
"People come and they go
Some people may stay with you though"
Aaaaand i have the same mic lol
razer mic bros
Hey man I just want to say I’ve been in this depressed state for about a month now and recently I’ve started to watch your videos and you lifted me up from a place I never thought I would be at in my life. Thank you
One unanswered message triggered my boy's villain arc. Keep it going my dude make sure you cultivate the skills that you need to be able to be unforgetable and unavoidable.
one unanswered message led to a video with hundreds of comments and over 100,000 views. guess i got my answer 💀
I really resonate with you bro, the amount of friends I have can be counted by the fingers on one of my hands, I used to really care about how other people saw me and how I could fit into the societal mold but its been a couple years since I changed that mindset and now I'm about to graduate highschool without the slightest care in the world that I have only 5 good friends, through the past 3 years I've been going to the gym consistently and now I'd say I'm respectably yoked. I started in january this year taking cold showers consistently. For the past 1 and a half years I've been training my focus and now I can study and work for hours in a day and after everyday I feel satisfied. My anger at first drove me to this "journey" but now my addiction to improving myself has kept me going.
i got ghosted by everyone i cared about after graduating, i fought it for awhile and it turned me into a monster. my psyche only started to heal after i accepted that i’m alone now, by ghosting me i became a ghost and there wasn’t anything that could change that. i’m still super frustrated on top of the extreme anxiety i developed and i can’t imagine ever having a ‘tribe’ again, bc i can’t imagine myself seeking anyone out. i’m sure i’ll feel differently with time, but i really felt this video. being invisible isn’t always as simple as ‘not putting yourself out there.’ i disappeared when the people i cared about didn’t want to see me. i have a long journey ahead of me trying to piece myself back together on my own, before i can even feel comfortable showing my face in public. when the people who tell you they love you don’t even respect you enough to tell you why they’re abandoning you… idk man it’s really hard to find the words, like i get confused just thinking about it. so ig i’ll stop and just end here, i’d love to have further conversation with some of you tho :)
any updates? what you went through is kinda relatable and i would love to know how you're doing now
@@sameerkarkal2112 man i’d love to tell you i’m over it, that at some point it got easy, but it freaking owned me. im definitely better, like i’ve picked up the marbles and tightened the screws for the most part, but i didn’t get over it in any beneficial way. at a certain point i just gave up on trying to heal and went back to the same unhealthy ways i was trying to hold it together back in high school. i want to try again in the future to confront these issues, it was just too intense for me to trust myself to keep up with responsibilities. i’m still somewhat worse than i was before the unfortunate series of events, but with everything considered i’m at least grateful to be able to say that i’ve improved, relatively speaking yk
i've never felt more understood for being lonely even when i have people around me. thank you for that.
As someone who actually quote
"disappeared for a year" it really can initially be fuelled by a power trip but what matters is the will to continue to improve and marking the right paths towards your goals.
I am close to hitting a year without any " social media" Of course by that i mean the apps where you can interact with your friends and though I don't regret it in the slightest it's amazing how much I got to know the difference between being alone and feeling alone like you can be alone and content and you can be active on socials and still feel this overwhelming feeling of not being visible to anyone
Yeah I have social media but still I feel invisible and unheard
I went through this phase 2 years ago and am just getting out of it now.
The thing that I learned that finally changed me was NOTHING IS PERSONAL AND NO ONE GIVES A SHIT.
Ruff's example of his friend who called him skinny either made a bad joke or was genuinely surprised. The better response than ghosting her and going cold is to laugh it off and not take it personally. I thought my friends were bullies and so I cut them off, however, 2 years later and I'm back to being great friends with the very people I had a falling out with and left because I stopped believing this egotistical mindset that people who disrespect me are out to hurt me. Rather I never take anything personally and will roast the person who just roasted me back.
I am a typical "nice guy" so this transition was hard for me but not taking anything personally is the one thing I changed to get exponentially more friends and talk to people way more.
YOUR LIFE IS NOT A MOVIE AND THERE ARE ALMOST NO BAD PEOPLE WHO WANT TO HURT YOU, GROW TF UP AND HAVE FUN!
That’s a great way to view it. Sometimes we see part of the (big) picture and we already assume we know why and immediately switch to victim mode. And your comment made me realise that so thank you. Also not turning yourself to the victim will help a lot, hardening your heart won’t help it will only destroy and ruin you ,making new people not see the real you and you missing out on actually living and respectfully caring for yourself❤.
I pray we GROW UP MENTALLY.
Me personally, I can tolerate a joke and joke back, but I don’t let anyone disrespect me. If they say something that crosses the line, I don’t immediately cut them off. Instead, I let them know by saying something along the lines of “let’s not push it”. Gotta learn to show your teeth sometimes.
BRO EXACTLY!!! THANK YOU FOR ARTICULATING THAT FOR ME, SPOT-ON!!
This. I accidentally said something rude to someone I want to be friends and we’re still cool
It is scary how relatable this is. Literally sent me goosebumps
Totally relate to you, way to go , I love how you shed light on this subject when almost no one did, but sometimes I still feel lonely.
its normal. as a social animal we truly need connection with others so i think a year is the longest period we should go without friends or connections.
it’s like fasting. fast for a couple hours and it’ll help you with ur diet. fast for too long and ur just starving.
we need food in the same way we need people. this is just a “relationship fast”.
fasting improves our relationship with food.
disappearing improves our relationship with ourselves.
take care of urself bro thanks for the kind words very muchly appreciated
@@ItsMeRuff Ruff , thank you for your comment, i am gonna kindly correct you , it's sister not bro, maybe my name isnt familiar to you but Zahraa is used for females.
@@zahrabenyahia9172 no one cares bro
@@pifon80085 well, are you Ruff? it doesn't seem like it. So just mind your own business. Thank you.
@@pifon80085 you right , it is the internet. thank you for reminding me sister :). ☺
this is a powerful mindset. when you said a high value man cuts out everyone who isn't valuable to him that made sense to me as to why some people have cut me out. Because I was that one with no direction in life. But now I see it for myself and am cutting people out that don't bring me value. I wouldn't say I've cut everyone out because there's still good people in my life, there's just a couple that provide me nothing. I feel way more at peace with myself without all the stress and negativity they brought into my life. Life's too short to waste or negative people.
there's something so comforting about disappearing. like, i always do something that makes me disappear. most of the time, i do it thru deactivating my socmed accounts. and yep, disappearing doesn't equate to wanting people to care for u like, u didn't disappear to see who would try to find u. u disappear bcs u're already invisible. u don't do it to see who cares. u do it bcs sometimes, it's the best thing to do for ur mental health especially if u're that lonely, insecure, and depressed hooman.
ive been self isolating for years because i felt like that "loner" who got ignored in every single situation so every time i get embarrassed i kinda just delete everyone and stop showing up. i got really fucked up mental health and habits and this video made me realize i "disappear" wrong. even though i have always been invisible i now realize i have to do it with the rights habits. hopefully it works cuz i almost accepted that I'll always be this loser
As someone who's considerably popular, in school, and a part of student council, i totally relate to what you said at the beginning, everyone knows me, everyone looks like they want to be around me, but it just doesn't feel like we're friends. I'm just a person they remember when they need someone to talk about. sad.
Real
You've won a sub dude.
I have been kinda into this for a year. I graduated high school and took a year off because i wanted to repeat the university admission exam. I left all my irl "friends" behind and started concentrating in making my life better, trying to be more proud of myself.
It has been a year since that and man it changed my life. I started going to the gym, now everyday seeing better results and feeling more confident and happier, i also got into med school which was my main objective since long ago and couldn't reach it last year because of insecurity, lack of motivation and depression and man, taking that year off was the best thing i've ever done for myself, it really has changed my life.
I kept talking to some online friends and hanging out with my family in order to keep high levels of mental health so yeah, that is also very very important as well.
I can relate to so many things u talked about and i wish everyone the bests of luck if they're into this as well
Always remember that the most important thing is feeling happy and proud of yourself, do not look at the future or past, just concentrate on the present and make the best out of it, that way you'll eventualy reach all of your goals ;)
I'm also in my gap year right now preparing for med school entrance exam - it's only 2 months away - reading your comment made me hope that I'll get there too one day .thanks for that and best of luck for your journey forward :)
@@why_wish wish you the best! Trust the process and achieve your dreams ;)
Omg, I generally don't write anything under a video, but this video touched me on a spiritual level. I disappear from social platforms from time to time and after graduating from high school I basically don't talk to anyone. And even though I don't have a problem with making friends. At some level, I always feel lonely, like I am not being heard or understood. So nowadays I am just bettering myself in my own company because as it turns out being lonely while surrounded by people is the worse than just being alone. I thrive in my own company and have done lots of reflection to better myself. I thought I was a weirdo for socially isolating myself willingly until this video, I guess it's a universal experience to some degree. I have also come to the realization that most people aren't interested in getting to know another person, they just like how being heard by someone else makes them feel :)
I cut all of my friends because they're not developing me in good way. They like me a lot and still try to connect me but i got whole other mindset than my old friends. They are drinking and after the girls what most teens do what i can understand, but i like just chilling at home and try to improve my coding skills. I work at a supermarket so i'm still social with people that make me less lonely. Indeed most of the people wanna be just heard by someone else.
Well if you really like being alone, then that's awesome, but I hope that you realize that there are good people out there that are willing to be friends with you. Of course people want to be heard, but what makes a friend is that they hear you out too. Just reassure yourself from time to time, that forming friendships shouldn't hinder your self improvement, and if you find the right people, it could make you feel better. I think a part of self improvement is recognizing your self worth and associating with others who see it too. :D
my guy, you dont need to cut out absoloutely everybody who isnt on self improvement. Its a good general principal to want to improve yourself, if you turn it into obsession, will experience a tidal wave somewhere in your life. Where you realize that its okay to let some things fall through the cracks, and that you cannot become this perfect person.
If your friends arent on self improvement, or they make you feel disrespected, then it is a good idea to demote them in your priority of relationships, in exchange for more higher quality relationships. But you don't need to completely cut them out, and take it extremely personally. Still try to be friendly, and say hi or even check it, but keep it surface level and moderated.
If you go the extremist route of disappearing, you may be suseptible to getting lost in isolation. You may have a change of heart that will make you reconsider everything in a moment. You may resolve the hurt they gave you, or you may even have a change in perspective and actually forgive them
Wow this guy I can relate to. Perfect grades without trying, hating school, very few friends, wanting to be successful. Earned a sub.
Incredibly well-explained.
Thanks for the part about negative emotions being negative, really helped me .
no problem bro. negative = bad.
You can become the next old sneako, you give off that vibe and it's dope, commentaries about life and cool clips of you doing random shit
Thanks for making this video, it rly speaks to me. I also cut off my friends last year around when this video was made. This video is lowkey like reassurance for choosing myself over them because they didn’t care for me like I care for myself.
But honestly the worst part about disappearing is when they don’t notice. I know ppl sometimes say it’s a good thing but it really shits on my mental health.
Hey man, I've been working on myself and my ideas for the past 3 months without being in touch with or letting anybody know about what I'm doing. And I can absolutely guarantee you that disappearing means you gotta work on your mental health and figure stuff out inside your head. That's what is helping me right now.
And your perspective clearly says that you're on the same journey. I'm not able to be as good at talking in front of the camera as you, but you putting my experience into words is inspiring me to talk about my thoughts myself.
So awesome video man. Appreciate it.
Same bro. You're on the right track. We're making it through this! Our paths may be lonely now, but they won't be for long.
I'm joining classes! I'm going to see live music! I'm meeting people here and there, and I feel better.
You're gonna be alright brochacho ❤️
Hang in there, kid
Hey bro, I'm also fresh sec sch grad. I wanna say that I can relate to you a whole bunch, but you got that extra courage to speak up about such things and it really makes me feel as though I'm not slowly going mad or that I'm just a social outcast. I love your content bro keep it up and whatever your goals for 'disappearing' is, I hope u achieve asap bro. cheers
thanks bro. glad u could relate ;)
@@ItsMeRuff bro hold tf up, you from singapore? because your whole shtick is like characteristic of sec sch students here
@@ItsMeRuff oh and, bro... i've got a lot of questions for you.
that quote you put in the desc, DAMN it struck a chord with me
it seriously resonated with me
and well, it's because, like you (i believe), i accidentally(?) disappeared..?
like, i stopped talking to people too, but it had nothing to do with like, youtube... it was exactly the same as the quote. i sort of just, suddenly changed i suppose? and i just... seeing who my friends were just... wasn't fun. it was immensely disappointing to see how they lived their lives. and, i didn't perceive it as fun anymore. i felt indifferent, i felt immensely uninterested. and, recently, i've realized it's much easier to simply just ignore people in class. so much so, i don't really even talk to people anymore.
have you ever felt it? and, seriously, imo the whole 'channeling your aggression into self-improvement' is sort of a good thing per se, but your application of it... eh, not all that good? i think it's good, your approach, but something doesn't exactly feel right in it, and i think i need some time to figure it out, i'll edit this comment once i do.
and lastly bro, gl for college or poly, it's a seriously hard journey out there. if you're going to college, it's completely fine to have a lot of zits on your face, because it is like 4 times as hard as sec 4. don't ever snowball. well, snowballing is like, not submitting an assignment on time. and in college, professors don't really baby you around. they can't like help you keep track of your assignments and shit because of the sheer amount of students they need to cater to.
so, take care, ok? and great job on the video, the editing was absolutely great, loved how minimal it was, and the flow was really good.
oh my god did i actually just write the length of an entire essay? jesus, i'm sorry dude lmfao i guess i had a lot to say
Really adore your train of thoughts! ♡
》Personally I didn't graduate school last year due to major health issues - repeated the year on an other school to now definitely pass graduation next month with highly improved scores.
My physical health got alot better: I made new friends, hung out with old friends - still have an annoyingly bad mental health though.
Most of the time I am the one reaching out to my friends, who all seem lost in partying, either with their new university-friends to escape their hardships or by themselves, trying not to be responsible for their future..
It all feels so unchallenging to me. Partying for the next years? Bro partying for like 2 days a year already drains me, never giving me a sense of fullfillment, but rather loss and loneliness. 《
Your video just made me realize to stop searching for comfort in the old days, but improving myself for the future days:
Focusing on myself, not my "friends" ; challenging myself more and spending time with people that have an honest interest in me.
Huge thanks for the message, I really needed it ~~♡♡
And I'm happy to be following you now sir, you're way too underrated!!
[edit: It turned out to be a ted talk...ooops lol]
Maaaaannnnn!!!! This hits hard as a truck. If anybody asks me anything about my disappearance I’ll show them your video. I wish we could be friends, i really wish there were people around me who thinks this way.
Can we be frnds
@@terminator.bgmi0 hello. It would be amazing
thanks for this video, i really needed it rn. I’ve been in a situation between wanting to be the social butterfly I pretended to be and taking care of myself (basically my only goal was having a good relationship with food and starting to have me in first place always) but it was basically impossible if i kept my social media and my “friends” that loved to gossip about everything breathing, i started to gossip about myself when i didn’t wanted to be a part of them, instead of putting others down i started to put myself down, and after months of thinking it i’ve decided to focus on me and the things i like by disappearing from the life of that people that pretended to care about me. It has made me realize i’m the only reason to be happy in my life. Thanks!!!
Dude…I thought I was the only one. You truly understand what I’ve been going through 🙏 you have no idea how much this video has meant to me❤
Bro this brings me at peace, wished I could’ve found this vid early cause I had to battle my way out on my own. But it was nice to hear I’m not alone who went through this
Seriously amazing stuff man, I relate to you a lot but the way you go about explaining your mentality and reasoning with so much composure is really refreshing.
Keep it up! :)
thank u sm. based.
A lot of times, the dead plants you were watering don't realize they weren't the ones initiating meet ups. I stopped texting someone like this back in highschool, and months later they came up to me all upset asking why I stopped wanting to hang out. They didn't realize they put out the vibes that they didn't want to hang out. Anyway, all I'm saying is you can't assume people consciously mean it if they aren't as enthusiastic to meetup over text, you never know how other people read situations, and it might not be bad intentions.
Afte college, I severed ties with almost all my classmates and batchmates, I left all groupchats and no one ever tried to reach out or tried to say Hi. That's when it became clear that there's nothing wrong with me. I'm just surrounded by fake people and people who likes conveniences that after I stopped being available, they just went on their lives.
DUDE im in the exact same situation currently. And all I can say is, sometimes we get pushed into situations that might not sit right with the ego, but are ultimately best for us, and eventually the more time passes, the more we realise we made an intuitively right decision and will come to terms with general gratitude. Thanks for making this video fr, feels great to know im not alone.
I relate to this video way too freaking much. I used to hang out with a bunch of toxic friends without noticing how it affected me as I tough "I'm just having a good time." But then as more time went on, I realized just how toxic they truly were, and all the drama that was being created by hanging around with the people I did. It was then that I took the decision to cut off everyone who wasn't positively contributing to my life. I've been prioritizing my mental wellbeing, but It's truly hard when you don't get to socialize as much as you once did. I have very little friends now, but I'm truly grateful to them, as they all contribute to a better more positive me.
thank you for voicing out loud what i’ve been thinking about for a while.
i like girl in red :)
Great video. Currently trying to go down the road of self-improvement myself. I had several people ghost me over the last 2 years. Left of read, delived, and would ponder the "why" behind it. Now, I only talk to one true friend of mine and it's a lot more peaceful. People are strange and sometimes don't return the love they are given, but knowing when to step back from that is key to being in a better headspace.
5:05 "a high value man only surrounds himself with people who benefit his purpose, he cuts out everyone who isn't valuable to him. he doesn't surround himself with negative people"
it's kinda relative, but imo no, a high value man doesn't discard everyone negative, sometimes you can find people that you want to elevate too, helping the homies that are worth it is part of being a high value man
I did the same last year (feb 2022) deleted all socials to prioritize myself. First week, noticed all my “friends” just forgot about me immediately. I am happy I did it, it’s about to be a year since and I love the isolation (with the exception of like 3 people that genuinely cared for me) my mental has improved so much, went from negative thinking 24/7 to being hopeful now.
I’m actually in the middle of doing this im on month 2 , the days seem longer and more lonely. But it is helping me slowly but surely. The only apps im on is RUclips and safari and that’s only for down time , take time for yourself
mental health is key. loneliness is just a symptom of bad mental health. if u make that ur focus, you’ll absolutely dominate. being alone will be your secret weapon. good luck bro, take care of urself.
bro, I'm glad I got recommended something worth watching for once. Really good video bro. You're right
Thanks bro
6 months ago I ended a toxic friendship and it was the best decision I could’ve done for myself. Ofc it was hard now that this person is trying to ruin my reputation. But I don’t care. I realize I respect and love myself too much to be dealing with that type of people. At the end of the day, this is your life, you’re your priority.
This is the realest video I have seen in a long time. I have recently been studying for my grad school exam and have been dealing with some severe loneliness and anger and this is a really good approach to this issue. I have been watering dead plants for such a long time and realized that all I needed was to get busy and become even more disciplined with myself.
I think this message needs to be heard by a lot more people. Thank you for taking the time out of your daily routine to share your ideas about the world. I have a fair amount of important people in my life who use negativity as their purpose, and I needed to hear somebody to say that for me to realize that I am too. Thank you.
It's wierd because I would like to have a large friend group, but the more I get to know someone the more I realise I don't like them so I end up pushing them away, and then I wonder why I don't have many friends. It sounds counterintuitive but sometimes being alone but happy is better than having lots of "friends" but never being or feeling valued and respected.
i have been doing this for 3 years with some breaks in the middle and It gave me a lot of insight
i kept doubting myself thinking i did everything wrong but doing this helped me find myself,
i still don't 100% know how to handle everything but it's definitely getting better
Honestly this made me feel better about disappearing, because I've used these 2 years to improve myself like crazy. I graduated HS early & ghosted the few people I had because I was sick of being harassed and bullied, I didn't dislike my friends, but I felt like I couldn't have boundaries with them. So I made a change. I was tired of an abusive home, so I moved cross-country. Although things aren't objectively that much better, I can say with confidence I'm finally at a skill level I'm comfortable with, but I'm only pushing to greater heights. I'm not a fitness gal so I can't relate to the gym stuff... but the grind doesn't stop no matter what you pick to improve. And things do get better. :)
I feel like ive gone through something similar- but not exactly the same. Cutting off people was because I didnt know how to communicate what I needed, and I needed too much for my friends to give due to lack of a proper support system at home. Ive started loving myself but became too comfortable with being alone. Then when isolation hit it hit even harder. I realised that, I couldnt love myself because there wasn’t anyone else for me I felt I could love. And in a way, loving someone else was the key in healing my love starved self. Theres always that saying of love yourself first, but if the very nature of human beings is so be connected with relationships, you have to have someone to love too ❤
Thanks for shedding light on this topic! It definitely needs to be discussed more, especially our technology and materialistic obsessed generation
Thank you a lot for this video, I'm someone who like you used to be, is lonely.. despite my rather big friendgroup. I can only speak for myself and really don't want to drag anyone's mood down, but I think that it's also really important to please people, just because you want to fit in. I've stopped doing stupid stuff, ex gossip about others and call them shit, just because my friends thought it was cool. I feel like I just got the wrong friends, it makes me feel lonely and brings me to the middle point of this. I'm changing and this video kinda made me fall over to the side you're currently on. So, thank you again for inspiring me
Hey thanks for making this video man (I wrote this comment once but my phone died before posting it 😭)
I really relate to your story a lot and I was in the same shoes as you throughout my school years, albeit probably not as popular or intelligent, but I had a similar clique of friends who was a negative in my life. The way you described someone who was motivated initially to go "disappear" was similar to mine, frustration/resentment towards the world, a lot of social anxiety, forced to fake themselves to fit in, etc... having immigrant parents who expect you to perform your best through that. I didn't find my purpose in life until Covid which gave me a taste of disappearing because everyone went online and was forced to stay in their homes. That's when I found my passion for music and was another reason for me to disappear after graduation. All my so called "Friends" was really just people I associated with cause I was forced to see them everyday, period to period, class to class, you can't avoid them so you interact at least. Then when you get to leave, the connection is broken and there is no reason to contact again. That was 99% of my friends basically in school. Only a select few from long ago or really strong ties stuck with me. And some of those people I don't feel like associating with as well because they are not prone to change like I'm trying to now. I've written down multiple lists of all my bad habits, vices, toxic traits, etc... and made plans to improve them, and failed many times throughout the years. Only up until now I have reached some forms of success in my isolation. I decided first I wanted to improve my relationship with my family because they are my closest to me and what I've been taught. I'm taking a gap with them and that seems like the best choice. I hated the school system (not education or learning, just the system), and I'm not going to college just to avoid them nor I want to deal with debt. And going to the army is the only backup choice I consider. I used physical discipline I learned through doing running sports to help deal with my mental health problems, I motivate myself through doing exercises and building good habits while destroying bad ones. I work on music and trying to build my brand in that as well. I've finally found my purpose, my calling in life which is to make music, inspire others, and take care of my "family" (because if they are really friend, they are basically family too). And yes those 3, It's very simplified but connects most of my philosophy in life together. Eventually I want to grow big enough to have a major positive altering impact on the world like X did, martin luther king, etc... but without the tragic death part, but if that's necessary then so be it. So I thank you again for making this video because it hits very deep in my life and has helped me become more motivated to follow this journey.
If you need a tldr (first time doing a tldr lol)
- I related to Ruff's life 95%
- Disappeared for same reasons
- No real friends
- Focused on improving myself
- Working on becoming a musical star
- Wanting to make a positive world change
That's alot of us fr🥲
Those are some of my goals too!
i feel like im watching old sneako all over again, its blessed. Keep it up man
I hear so much good about "old sneako"
Should I check out his old content?
@@MementoTurtle if you can find it yeah, alot of it is a mix of like commentary + Filmmaking. It was really cool cos it felt like you was growing with him, and the way he expressed thing was just different to everything else. shame he fell off ;-;
@@itsnotthefishipromise I will try to find it, seems interesting
Awfully touched by your candour. I can fully understand why you needed to disappear. Sometimes, we just cannot make it when people around us cannot make it. I used to teach a bunch of kids with another teacher, Y, for about a year. Whenever Y was too kind with them, I found it hard to tell her not to do so, because she was a veteran teacher. Unable to do so often make me upset and uptight whenever the students started to be rude to her and I. While she could condone their disrespectful behaviours and tests of boundaries, I could not take it, and would often tell them off. As time went by, I became the bad guy in their eyes and she became the good and the worst thing was, I could sense it - through their conversations ("let's not talk about Mr X"), the hush-hush that ended their small group conversations when I happened to pass by, their sarcasm, their rolling of eyes and turning of def ears to my instructions to keep quiet for the lesson, mimicking me with offensive rhymes and jingles simply to annoy. Then came Teachers' Day... (oh, how I hate that day!) I could sense something hatching among this bunch of kids. Having been their teacher - form teacher even for so many months, I could sense it coming. But I could do nothing about it. Then and there, I was sincerely thinking about "disappearing" from the class totally. It wasn't easy to make that decision, honestly, because why should I, who did nothing wrong? But I still attended class that day. I couldn't bring myself to disappear, at least not physically. So I really admire you for your courage and yes, when you need it to restore, recover and re-establish yourself, you just need it. I was so silly not to... Long story short, I went, knowing that they had planned a hurtful surprise for me, knowing how evil they can be, disguised under their innocent, child-like (or even angelic) appearance. That day, they sent their monitor to get me to the classroom. upon reaching, the vice monitor came out to stop me from entering, saying that they had not finished decorating the classroom. Then, the monitor took me to an opposite classroom to wait. ("Be patient, teacher! We will let you in when the classroom is ready.") As I waited anticipatively in the other classroom, I saw them led Y into the classroom, clapped and cheered as she entered, with party poppers and a cake, then each of them taking her to the spot where they drew on the whiteboard to explain their artwork... and I was totally out of their picture... that was then that I had disappeared, felt like disappearing, and disappeared. Nobody asked where I was after that. Nobody came to the classroom to look for me. Y didn't ask me where I was? The class only asked about me after the September holidays. "Why didn't you turn up for the hall celebrations?" Some of them asked, but it just hurt, it just hurt me big time when it came only after the holidays, when the monitor and vice-monitor were among those who asked. That was the worst Teachers' Day celebration and term break that I have ever experienced. I really cried buckets, hiding away from everybody, yes, no texting, no posting, no calls. I declared myself dead both as a teacher and a human being. When I told my friends or even family members, all they could say was, "Go do your own reflections, there must be something you have not done well or enough that had led to this." It made me question how much I mean to them. Even they would see me as a failure! Why then should I associate with them anymore. So I went on aggressive and really just went hide away from the world roaming the streets and yes, really taking a break, looking at just nature, just some random sounds of my surroundings, be it a park or a mall, I finally brought myself to realise that no on in this world cares more than you do about you. You are only important when you feel important. Your disappearance means nothing to others - it does not make them feel your importance at all, but your re-appearance does. It tells them their importance - you are returning stronger to make them realise their weakness, but you have forgiven yourself enough to forgive them. Will a butterfly still be angry with people who called them ugly when they were still caterpillars? It takes a rest in the cacoon, lonely, hidden and broken, to modify ourselves with new strength, body and mind, to do the rest!
I am going through the same thing rn. I was introvert at school but high school taught me confidence. I went to university n found a bunch of people. Everybody wanted to be my friend. I had two benchmates with whom I was the closest. There was a girl who tried to become my friend but I always felt a resistance, still somehow we ended up being the same 5 people group. Thn COVID happened n she started talking to me more n more n we grew closer. I felt a connection with her. I used to call her my soul sister. Thn after COVID when I met her again I felt the same resistance like before as she is not the one with whom I used to talk for hours on phone. She didn’t even talk to me for days bcz of trivial reasons n I used to apologise but she didn’t care. Most of the time she insulted me in front of everyone n what not. I used to cry a lot. I dropped out of my college n on last day she called me n said so many bad things. Like “everyone hates you,you have ruined my life” etc etc. I cried so bad n left the place. I felt like I m kicked out of my own group n no one calls me or talk to me from my batch. It’s been month n I felt like those words are written all my body n I want to erase it all. It hampered my self worth n I m still working on myself.
Im sorry you can do it remember its you vs you!
You can move on ❤
after high school I worked as a cook for 3 three years and lived by myself. Most lonely, fun, sad and soul searching period of my life. I'm a student at community college now and know my purpose
idky but this reminded me of when i was in 10th grade and i ditched class a lot and just went to sit outside a subway. there was this one subway employee i saw all the time who came out to smoke weed and listen to edm music on a speaker and he danced so funny
I'm in my 4th year and it gets so addicting.. The downfall seems like I don't know how to be around people anymore, my anxiety hightens
same. i havent spoken to anyone for the 2 months since 2022 when i graduated so i decided to return to my high school to tutor new students and so im working with other alumni which forces me to be social. plus i need to organise and teach a bunch of 13 year olds which is the greatest test of stoicism and patience haha.
honestly if ur anxious just being around people, it’ll only get worse as time goes on. at some point u hv to talk to ppl again which kinda sux but i think forcing urself back into a familiar environment is one way to get back into it. thx for the comment bro
Im a very social person. But u realized this way earlier and made friends with people that deserve me and love me. Being surrounded by people charges me. I hope you get thru this !!
take it from me cutoff/just stopped texting the people i graduated with and were my friends (only 1 person of the hundreds i knew stayed in contact with me) and now three years later im self employed off my music making more than my teachers 😂 shi definitely sucked for a while but the bad also comes with the good, remember a heart beat monitor goes up and down and when it stays flat your done for. know that when something feels terrible its only cuz you've experienced something that made you feel amazing. haha thats all i got great vid G hope this might help at least one person🙏🏼
This man definitely deserves a subscriber
i agree
This video is amazing going through kinda same situation rn but this video gave me alot of clarity thank you for making this video and your sense of humour is amazing as well
I've gone through the same thing. My "friends" were just people who shared addictions with me. Video games, junk food, porn etc. Yeah we could laugh together but inside my soul was withering away. I cut them off last year but I met up with them one day I was feeling lonely, and I understood why I left. I couldn't respect them. They weren't true friends.
To them, I disappeared.
I get this feeling so much, with my friends usually ghosting me, or getting mad at myself and mentally breaking down. My friends are good people that I still connect with, but mentally I'm still alone, and even during my graduation during 2023 I was extremely negative, and I had been for the entire senior year, because I've just been alone. I can feel everything that Ruff has been saying, even if there is red pillish language, the loneliness does hit home.
TL:DR: i feel that loneliness as a very depressed young asian kid
thank you for not letting us feel like we are alone on this
I remember not too long ago, i isolated myself to supposedly get better and all that shi (i was working out, but i was also watching anime, playing minecraft). I actually hated everyone, and didn't talk even with my family. Most of the time i was in my room and, I really think it affected my mental health, my social skills just went downhill (i wasn't very extroverted before but, at least i had friends, had a social life). I really look back when i got the courage to talk to a girl i liked and actually she became my girlfriend (we broke up one week after though lmao). And then, i was like an alien, alone, and sad. But now, I'm almost 18 and i need to actually stop that crappy bullshi, I'm gonna be an adult soon and i really want to improve myself, not just physically but socially and mentally too. We're all gonna make it brahs. (Just in case english is not my first lang so i might've made some mistakes)
This video made me relate, realize, learn, and laugh. I'm now subscribed and hope you keep up the good content!
The texting back thing is so real. It happens in my work chat all the time. I feel like it's my life's story. And while I don't want to be alone, I'm okay with being alone for now. I'm ahead of 95% of the people I knew in high school (financially) and I scored a very laid back job that lets me devote my time to self improvement and self reflection. I know what I want from life and I know how I'm getting there. Those who want to succeed are welcome to join.
You dropped this 👑
I love the words you spit! Poetry, Humour, Ted-Talk-esque, A smidge of Philosophy, slightly a counselor, a good friend, nutritionist. HAHAHA, man you are ALL!
This video had me thinking about a lot of things. Especially something like my social life. You see, I have an interesting friend group. They mainly consist of the guys who are super smart, 4.0 GPA, taking 5 AP classes type guys, but I'm no where near as academically able as my friends. They all relate to each other much more closely than I do to them. I feel that the only reason that I still hangout with them and we do things together is that I've known many of them since I was about 5 or 6 years old, so we have many experiences together. But, now we are soon to be going off to college, and I have to realistically think that I might not interact with them anymore. I'm more of an introvert who tends to stay inside, and I really only open myself up to new experiences because I force myself to. I wonder how I would be able to make friends when I am on my own, or get ready for something like being alone.
I think this was the first ever video which I can relate to completely!
I have been off from each and every social media app for about 2 years now, and man I can see the changes in me.
I am now a happier person and also achieved many goals after cutting off the toxic people who were so called my "friends"
I have been talking to 2-3 close friends who really gets me, but other than that I am all alone and happy!
More power to you, hope you get what you are working for. 👏
Im going thru the same thing dude, i never surrounded myself with a lot of people but the few friends i had, were like me, depressive, lazy and afraid. Doing excercise is my most loved activity, i always tried to introduce anyone, a friend, to getting fit. With time i realized how much the people that surround you and how much time they surround you, can affect your mind. Now im more lonely, which really came out as a little depressing, but thats exactly what gave me such a clear mind, being alone. So now i can think more clearly, and talking about clear i can clearly sleep better, making my muscles, and most importantly, my brain, work better.
Im trying to surround myself with some strong people that i find on a park close to my house, they also do calisthenics so i thought it was a good idea to talk with them, made some friends on the way.
Sometimes I wish I could disappear SO badly or cut off many of my friends not bc my friends are bad, but recently I’ve been battling severe anxiety along with depression and feel like I can’t talk to anyone so I haven’t. I don’t cut anyone off bc they did nothing wrong and I’d feel bad for it.
Just being around people other than a certain family members feels so draining and anxiety causing and I’ve used unhealthy ways of coping.
I can’t disappear tho, bc I live with my family and can’t skip school unless severely sick. That may be a good thing tho bc if I was left all alone I don’t know what I’d do to myself.
I didn’t even know disappearing was something “a lot” of ppl did until watching this. I’m gonna revisit this vid when it’s not 3am and see if this gives me motivation to change bc honestly, I really need it before the next school year starts.
i disappeared after getting my heart broken and you said everything i felt and said in the moment. you are a bright individual foo you gone be great
I noticed that I disappeared for three years during the pandemic, I also just started to do it again in ‘23. Im about to graduate and I need to focus on myself, also going through a major heartbreak. The heart break is what drove me to delete all my social media profiles, I don’t want to be tempted to contact them. I truly hate people and it drove me to disappear.