1. Get to know the real you 2. Spend time doing things alone 3. Acceptance and forgiveness 4. Taking good care of yourself mentally and physically 5. Best friend test 6. Trust your gut 7. Be patient and take your time..
I never knew how to self love until this year. I always give people more than they deserve. A total empathetic overboard. I learn self love and set healthy boundaries with others. It made me feel bad for not overdoing things for others, but that’s the beginning of me mastering self love and finding the right people
We are actually alike.. there is a way i feel tormented for not helping out ..or definitely doing something for someone .. not coz i have..buh just coz i have to gv.. yet i at tymz fail to meet my needs just for others ...xo its high time i change for what i am..attitude matters alot tho📌
My last relationship lasted 10months, it was on and off, very toxic relationship that broke me, he was manipulatiive, controlling and a total narcissist, I knew from the first date that that man was wrong for me but still went ahead with it. It's been six weeks since break up and I have done counseling and going through spiritual journey , reading self-help books and realised that it was due to my insecurities, I felt I was unlovable, that I was demage goods, never felt beautiful, I was lacking total self love. I can now look in the mirror and like what I see, I also realise how strong I'm as a woman, as a person, I canan see my own worth now. Still a long way to go, not easy to get rid of 46 years of negative thinking but I will keep at it. I need to do it for me and my children. Thank you, your videos resonate with me and made me see things clearer.
I did the same thing. I didn't realize this man was a narcissist. I never knew what a narcissist was until l was very involved with him. My insecurities allowed me to accept his manipulation & on & off behavior. It's over, but l stayed way too long. Don't fall for the love bombing because it is all fake.
Same im 52, all about our childhood foundations, people don't understand that for a lifetime thats all u have known in every cell in yr body, till u realise it's not right & then the journey of trying to somehow release all of that damage & programming, it's very painful & difficult, it's not as easy as people say.....it's the past!! Yeh but deeply embedded beliefs that u don't understand or know any different, until u are lucky enough to "wake up" (A terrifying experience) from the years of not understanding, guilt, shame, confusion, rejection, mistrust, failure etc, etc etc & now a journey of trying to change my whole mindset & limiting beliefs, how do u do that after 52 years?? It's not an over night job!! Very overwhelming & have lost myself i can't even count, But know i must keep trying to be who ever i am supposed to be, LOVE MYSELF FIRST.....how ever u do that!!!😔 ❤🙏
@@pure-pisces9470 It's been a year since that comment and after reading it now, I'm not sure who that person is any more. That relationship was a catalyst for my drastic change I've grown so much, I'm so much happier now, most of my insecurities disappeared, I had to look at myself in an honest way, realising my mistakes and make the changes. The biggest change, I refuse to be the victim in my life. For now I'm not dating, working on healing, enjoying time with my children and giving myself permission to be happy. Please don't let your past and childhood dictate your future. Anytime I have a negative thought of myself, I catch it immediately and direct it into positive. I'm not saying that I'm completely healed by I'm truly on the way. You sound like a strong person with great insight into your life and I'm sure that you can find a way to heal and come out stronger Warmest wishes Marina
Gosh, everything you say here I am doing! When you begin to love yourself, you wear it too and others notice it! Its like you begin to glow. Awesome video!!!
Immediately after my 25 year marriage ended, I became involved with a woman that was very skilled in hiding most of her flaws. Her baggage appeared as slightly above the norm, but the way she presented herself and becoming what I wanted was her first priority. Then came an abnormal drive and pressure for me to marry when I was trying to recover from divorce. I was smitten with her, but deep in my heart knew her goals were a lifestyle and not pure love for me as a man. The relationship ended badly after betrayal and was difficult for me to experience another failure within 3 years of a failed marriage. Please love yourself first before attempting to give yourself to another. There's no way around it. Become that complete person on your own before moving forward, You are worthy!
"Be that complete person on YOUR OWN before moving forward". This is the exact realization that came to mind this morning. A Divine revelation indeed ✊🙏🙏🙏🙏
I don’t know why self love is so difficult. I have been tell myself what I can offer and that I am enough and worth being loved, but my negative thoughts about myself still show up and take over.
Again, my grandmother always told me that to love a person , you must first love yourself unconditionally. When she passed I got a tat of the Celtic heart that represents unconditional love, to remind me daily to love myself and be self accepting and realistic expectations of who I am. To love another I learned to nurture myself and be happy in my own body. It takes work each day and acceptance. So happy to see that this is a high priority of good relationships.
Have bn in a toxic relationship for sometime and what makes me hate myself now is that I can't resist this man, he goes silent for sometime then boom he comes back and I still give in to him, am tired of this cycle its draining me totally
Sounds like a trauma attachment. Something about this person’s behaviour towards you and treatment of you sounds like it’s diminished your self-worth which has started a trauma attachment. You are worth far more than that. Say to yourself ‘what decisions would I make today if I loved myself?’. I doubt you’d let that person back in.
This was a great video. When we don’t love ourselves, we tend to get in bad relationships. I did, but I am becoming my best friend. I have boundaries concerning who can be in my world, and getting to know my true authentic self. Thank you for all you do!
I was just used to get hurt from past relationship. Last one was an abusive verbal abuse. He didn't care. And my family was try to me. But I didnt realize how he was until the covid 19 and saw his true colors. Thanks for your videos. It help me & with of try to love myself. So hard for me! I'm used to get hurt. But im gonna change that! Be stronger than I ever been!!
I’ve been friends with people who mistake my kindness and soft spoken nature for weakness. Over the years I have given into them. Well not anymore! Oh hell no! I am awesome and am ready to live and walk in it.
I’ve just come out of a relationship with the love of my life . All you’ve mentioned in your video clip about having love from a parent, I, my sister and my brother didn’t have any from our parents, this week I have contacted a local NHS organisation so they can help me to deal with my issues
Ive always been drawn to party people, alcoholics etc. They see I am also not looking after and caring for myself by drinking and being unhealthy and it always causes relationship issues. I also overcompensate in relationships. And in the end the partner says 'the attraction is no longer there' Thank you for this video. It taught me so much.
Amazing video!! I saw myself in a lot of what you expressed! I made the wrong decision to approach a guy again, that didn't work out the first time, to try again.. What was I thinking!! Things were actually worse this time, his unavailability and excuses were excessive..unless they were on his time, when it was convenient with him! It was a light bulb moment.. I decided quickly to end things for the last time! Used self love to do this, and I have never felt more respect for myself! Ended things over a text... Which I don't recommend, but his unavailability to talk left me no other choice. Left, with my head held high, explaining my reasons, not blaming either one, just saying things were not meant to be with us. I did not allow his behavior to compromise my value and integrity. Thank you for sharing this video! Enjoy your topics and content very much!
We do the things that we ought to be not doing because we failed to see that greater things are yet to come... we are stuck on the thought that this one is for us when in fact its not! Its not wrong to fight for that relationship but learn to let go if needed to. You are far more valuable to settle for anything less... you are loved... you are beautiful... you are worthy! God bless❤️
This video has to be one of my favorites on RUclips! I love that you have the credentials and life experiences as a relationship coach! My favorite coach. Thank you, Dr. Antonio!
Yes Antonio I was in a relationship for 18 years.. I treated him like gold. He treated me badly. Why did I hang in so long? I think I thought he would change, he didn’t. I have a beautiful relationship now.. a man who adores me.. but I’m doing for him. He does for me too. But I’m afraid he will start to take advantage of my goodness and pull back. Jeez so hard!!!!
Wow, your words in the end about ignoring the intuition, really struck me. I didn't realise how much I needed to hear it from someone else before seeing this video. Thank you.
Been there so many times and now I am here. Trying to learn how to love myself. It still hurts but, maybe I just have to accept it. Thank you for this video. Keep safe.
I cant still dating someone else because i still have feeling to my ex...just im going to do its watching Antonio Borrello youtube so its cleared my mind what im going to...this video help me a lot
Thanks for posting your videos..they're helping me out building back my self again .I'm learning how to love myself again after giving my all to him...for him all I did was nothing..well.. goodbye to him..i dont need him in my life
This is a great video,self love is a definition of mental strength.if you love your self first definitely you be able to commit a healthy relationships.because it strarts with you.
I had depression and anxiety from childhood and took medicine while I was only 8 years old for 2 years . All my life I had anxiety then since 5 years ago I got panic attack went to see physiactist and phycologist then knew that I am also bipolar and borderline disorder. All of them are under control with medicine. But sometimes panic attack returns. Anyway I am in 3 years relationship which it goes now to bad place. By the way I watched most of the video and started act as you advice and wait to see what happens. Thanks for all your effort to post such useful videos. I appreciate that.
I have been in a long time relationship and we are together in one roof. But it feels like he doesn't want nor need me. There are times I feel that he care about me but most of the time, it feels like he was just looking for a right time to get out on a relationship. We don't fight, but its been years and I still can't feel that he was committed. It feels like he was there physically, but not emotionally. And I feel like I have wasted years of waiting for him to treat me the way I deserve to be.
👍 self love is innocent and important it mean you care if your own well being in happiness. Postive optimism. Self attachment self reguard Self trust self understanding Inner peace Self help Self love self high value Self trust self involved self works self defense self kindness Self nutriting Self guided Self educated Self forgiveness self spiritual awakening self control self progress self worthy self qualified self service self visionary self reflection self believe self heal self belief self faith self acceptance self like Self worth Self knowing Self caring of heath Self confidence self high esteem self value self respect Self decisions Self choices Self spend time of yourself at times. Self stand up for myself.
Thanks so ooooo much Dr for all the beautiful videos my boyfriend was also a psychologist with attachment style it was a roller coaster I was able finally to take self esteem and respect then walk away
I love your videos. Antonio I’m a caretaker, I love to do for my man. Years and years Iv done that. Iv been wrong. I tell my kids I’m going to take care of ME!!! They say I’m selfish. I don’t know what to do. I’m really understanding what you are saying. It’s so clear what you are saying. It’s implementing that is hard.💙
One of the best relationship coach i’ve watched here in RUclips. You use easy terms and make us (viewers) comprehend with your advices and insights efficiently. You’ve helped me a lot, may God bless you more! 💟
This video really made my day It saved me going to a psychiatrist Cse i really deny what i see is damaging .. just to do what my heart tells me .. And the result is more damaging than i really imagined .. I really love all of your videos ..
I love these videos. They do help me a lot especially this one. I've been talking to a guy over texting and honestly, I'm really not even for sure how he feels. In some ways, he seems like he's interested then other times, he doesn't. If i don't text him all day, he'll send me a message at night. I'm socially awkward, I'm a complete introvert, just got out of an abusive marriage about a year ago and i do have a hard time loving myself and am almost tempted just to be with anyone who will have me and its wrong. I don't want to be that way.
Hi, thank u for ur video. I agree that self-love & dignity are the best gifts u can give to yourself. I was brought up by a narcissistic mum who destroyed me. I don't know what true love is. Sadly, I married a man just like her( with her encouragement). It took me many years to realise what has happened to me. Today, I try to love myself as much as I can. I also enjoy my own company.
Sometimes you know what to do but if, instead of coming up with a justification to do it, you recognize you know what’s the right thing to do, but you’re not ready to do that just yet is the most compassionate and successful decision. Let me explain... This acceptance of where you are and where you need to be, or acceptance of your limitations, is like signing up for a marathon but allowing yourself 3 months to train for it and finish it instead of not being able to finish at all. You know what to do, you get ready, you come up with a plan, and you make sure to get out successfully the first time without setbacks or self doubt. Great topic! .
Even at my time in life this video hit home always being a caregiver. Wondering if l am an empath, l want to thank you dr Antonio. You are excellent. I cannot thank you enough. Sincere regards. Bobble R
Oh my goodness! This is hands down the most helpful video I have ever seen. Took notes all the way through & am reviewing all of this content to put it into practice. I just wanted to say thank you for explaining and sharing. This is so valuable, and I know it’s going to make a significant difference for me, and for many others who are able to access this material. Keep up the excellent work!
I didi something aweful and it became a huge problem between me and my fiancee and his family. Later on, I realized my mistakes and did an apology but he doesn't want us to get back together even thougj I already reached out and told him I want him back. I also cannot move out yet because of quarantine due to Covid threat. Each day I see him, I know I still love him and I will still choose to be with him because we have already built a life together and I still want to give it a try.
Thank you and. Yes very helpful got got into a relationship because I thought he was different from other men but it turns out after 5 years he's still the same as any other man
Hello doctor! I just watched this today, July 5, 2020.. and I am sooo happy because I really find this so helpful! I really had hoped that I saw this years ago when you published this.. this might save me from my past relationship and save my new relationship from giving a heartbreak 💔 i am sooo stupid back then! This is what i really need to hear.. thank you sooo much! I hope to hear more from you and may you continue to help people about self love.. I am really blessed. God bless you, doc!
Do you need help sweetheart??? I recommend you to a powerful man who can help you solve your relationship problem completely without delay sweetie ❤️🌹✔️ he helped me few days ago. He can help you sweetie
i am in a bad marrried for 7 years. always covermind and let the husband take me for granded until i watch a lot of video from you. understand myself more. Im going to walk aways from it Thank you a lot. i love your video.
Thanks you. This is exactly what I need..I discovered my husband took a second marriage, I was hospitalized closer to death & miracly granted a second life., I still tried to give a chance knowing this is part of our religion, but I found out being disrespected, that love has gone even since 5yrs ago I was already feeling unsecured with him., maybe I kept staying in this marriage because of my family loyalty & values..now I started to love someone, but is also a complicated due to distance and communication barrier...now I started to just embrace myself, a self-care, gym and reading alot., I'm Still with my stupid husband due to pandemic limitations, I am Very dependent to him even I'm working in our company he taking control our finances... One day, when this pandemic ends I want to travel somewhere for a new beginning...
Thank you so much,for sharing self-esteem,self value,bcuz right now I am in situation that relationship injured of actions,behaviour,and by words,I'm about loosing my worth and love myself even uncontrolled mindset in times of angerness attach specially when times ,my hormones are an imbalance I am thankful ,watching some of your advice it really help me a lot,and just right now I'm back myself for being me just before,to love myself and value God bless your channel more people lives will touch and learn
I never understand this self love stuff!! had to watch this video 5 times. The final time I decided to pause it throughout And take thorough notes. I finally get it. I always want what's best for others, but neglect myself. This was extremely helpful, seeing yourself as your child you're taking care of or as your best friend. How would I act towards THEM? That was an eye opener. Thank you for this. ♥️
Thank you for clearly explaining self love. Its good to finally understand exactly what it is. I really appreciate this video. I find it extremely helpful. You're a star and a great communicator.
@@AntonioBorrello you really deserve respect.Your vast knowledge regarding relationship is appreciated. I am in this situation and getting alot of help from your videoes.I was in depression and suddenly watched your video and came back to normal mental state.
I like that advise that you said of treating your self like a friend .Sometimes I let things happen in my relationship and I ilerate that even though it's bad . Sometimes I feel jeloues of my partner and like u said it's bad .and I tolarte that on me becouse sometimes I felt like saying to how I feel would change but his anger is just 0 tolerance and when he does this .make mad because I feel he doesn't give a crap how I feel and makes me a person that I don't want to be .so am going to practice self love on my self and see how that goes and not say stuff like you love me and things like that and just love what I do .
I love all your videos on relationships, I been with a guy for 15 yrs and he started driving trucks, he is not a local driver, and he be gone a wk and when he get back home , he be at home for that night, maybe 2 nights, then he turn right back around and go back out. I really never wanted to deal with a truck driver and I told him that before he took this job, but we had been together about 5yrs then so I went on and accepted that, but I just don’t get enough time, and he is full of excuses, and I’m tired of it, I sure have been hoping things would change but it haven’t. I just got into it becuz I simply ask him some questions about something I wanted to know, wasn’t nothing bad but he went out west with it, and said somethings about my mother and sons and I don’t appreciate it and I let him know that. I would never say nothing about his mother just becuz I got mad at him, so what I done was block him off my phone, I feel free that I’m not talking to him, I miss talking to him but I’m not putting up with his behavior, this not the first time he did it. I love him but I’m not going to deal with this becuz I ask questions about something I wanted to know, plus he make no time for me, it’s all about that truck he drive. Please give me some advice..
I’m actually in a relationship that has torn me emotionally it has brought my self-esteem down my confidence is down because he constantly compares me to someone else tells me he wants me to be like that person in order for us to be in a relationship I listen to your video and you have A lot of healthy tips how do I get my confidence and build up my self-esteem I want to walk away from this person how can I walk away.
The main reason why I stay around people and relationships that make me sick is because I think I am building resilience and that I'm trying to be more understanding and learn not to run away when things get tough (basically making sure I'm not a spoilt brat! Haha). But very recently I started talking back to myself and saying it's ok to walk away after I've tried so much. It's still hard and I haven't completely practiced it but I started the serious talk, so I'm closer to be strong enough to do it!
oh my so specific!!!I really appreciate this..need this so much..i want to be ready to what the universe will give me so I need this to have the best foundation in receiving..love lots more power
First of all I love your channel. And I believe you are right about self love. I am learning to love myself first, and I find that it makes a difference in my dating life. I may not always find the right person right away but I will see myself reflected in how much he likes himself. I have yet to find the person who reflects in what I love in myself should be important in him as well. I get excited when I see the person who does take care of himself. But I can put down the dating and go Pursue other activities. But when I do find someone I find interesting and it doesn’t work, i am not disappointed I am excited to learn about someone new. But loving myself puts up boundaries for bad behaviours from other people. I am learning new things through your messages. I notice behaviours I didn’t see was there. My next relationship will be positive and it helps to have someone with learned knowledge give out information. Thank you for being there. 👍
This video helped me out alot about understanding myself a bit more. I knew there was something in my life that was missing and that was being able to understand myself and being able to be me rather than trying to be the person everyone else or more specifically my ex wanted me to be.
Great video, sometimes we don't realize we are attracted to the wrong guy. Low self esteem comes from a childhood with no love. I tend to try to prove I'm worthy over and over. I don't give in so I loose a lot of guys. But that is a sign they're not for me. I always seem to feel like I'm begging to be loved. I hate the way that feels. I know I need help.
It’s very hard to practice self love me personally being honest here it is extremely hard to ignore the in denial voice in our heads even if we know what is truly right and what we truly deserve. To self love.. easier said then done. I say if your going to love or be in a relationship make sure you do with with caution ⚠️ because you are up for a ride. 😐I really love your video though very inspiring and touching. Wish me luck. Just getting out of a relationship. Time to focus on myself and find my self love that I’ve slowly lost because of getting heartbroken multiple times 💔
This is so so extremely hard to do. Trying really hard to love myself because can't find love. I just can't. And won't unless I practice this. Just wish I knew more about how to do it.
Self love now i understand it...This comes after my partner told me that i don't love my self...before that she had been telling me,she needs time alone and not even seeing someone else even her parents..with this, i have been in a vaccum, insecurities being at high rate and alot of stress...need more of your advice cause i fear loosing her
I actually have started to learn more about loving myself and all that I would like to find not only in myself but in that special person. I have found that my spiritual beliefs limit me in the dating field and it used to bother me alot, but now I wont compromise in this area of my life. Definitely have learned that this is where I have found my identity, self love, and taking care of myself more. Where I still need to be stronger Is not staying in a relationship if its unhealthy. Sometimes it has been easy and others not so much. I love the test for Best Friends. I am glad that you have been talking about these tests that we can utilize, because I have done these just in different ways. I hope that you all find "The One" but mostly you find your true beauty and value as well. Thank you for posting this , it really made me feel better ❤ Many Blessings to you all, Carol
Dr Borello is super intelligent, he give clear explanation. Thanks I'm a new subscriber.💜I'm going to apply all his advice in my life. And I'll be a better version of myself. I love your episode " how to be happily single.💜
We are our own worst critic! Love how you said take the best friend approach. Giving yourself the advice you'd give your best friend. DING DING DING💜 (Side note.. I often wonder if you find it hard to turn of the psychologist in you? From the outside its like, he's successful, handsome, probably funny.. .And single. Single? I chuckled thinking, How many times has he heard, stop psychoanalyzing me. Turn off Dr Antonio! Pro..you give dating advice...Con..You give dating advice. Knowing why someone does something or acts a certain way, must be hard for you I think of the strangest things.) Another great video, Thank you!
Yes yes yes. Been waiting for you to post this video. I have been doing a few of these steps. Can I share your links in my group next week. You been a real eye opener and your amazing to break everything down so we can all understand and help ourselves 😘
I've recently watched a few of your videos. I find them wonderful and insightful. I have a young daughter. It would be nice if you included single parents as a new perspective to all of the videos you've already created.
I find these tips really helpful and effective. I did try it and it is working for men I had relationships with. Too bad I just became very busy. So I end up having no time for any now. But so far, if you love yourself, it's not that hard to eliminate those people not willing to stay. Keep it up girls!😘😘😘😘
1. Get to know the real you
2. Spend time doing things alone
3. Acceptance and forgiveness
4. Taking good care of yourself mentally and physically
5. Best friend test
6. Trust your gut
7. Be patient and take your time..
Thank you for posting the steps...need to put that on my bathroom mirror
Thank you so much for this
Self Love is respecting yourself your life your body and enjoying your own company knowing you are worthy of being treated like a Queen..
This was beautifully said!
Treating yourself like a Queen.
Exactly
Curtistine Miller ..Yes I Am !!
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I never knew how to self love until this year. I always give people more than they deserve. A total empathetic overboard. I learn self love and set healthy boundaries with others. It made me feel bad for not overdoing things for others, but that’s the beginning of me mastering self love and finding the right people
Me too, I'm learning this..
We are actually alike.. there is a way i feel tormented for not helping out ..or definitely doing something for someone .. not coz i have..buh just coz i have to gv.. yet i at tymz fail to meet my needs just for others ...xo its high time i change for what i am..attitude matters alot tho📌
My last relationship lasted 10months, it was on and off, very toxic relationship that broke me, he was manipulatiive, controlling and a total narcissist, I knew from the first date that that man was wrong for me but still went ahead with it. It's been six weeks since break up and I have done counseling and going through spiritual journey , reading self-help books and realised that it was due to my insecurities, I felt I was unlovable, that I was demage goods, never felt beautiful, I was lacking total self love. I can now look in the mirror and like what I see, I also realise how strong I'm as a woman, as a person, I canan see my own worth now. Still a long way to go, not easy to get rid of 46 years of negative thinking but I will keep at it. I need to do it for me and my children.
Thank you, your videos resonate with me and made me see things clearer.
Good luck, you seem to be a great person, you deserve the best just remember that
I did the same thing. I didn't realize this man was a narcissist. I never knew what a narcissist was until l was very involved with him. My insecurities allowed me to accept his manipulation & on & off behavior. It's over, but l stayed way too long. Don't fall for the love bombing because it is all fake.
relationships suck.
Same im 52, all about our childhood foundations, people don't understand that for a lifetime thats all u have known in every cell in yr body, till u realise it's not right & then the journey of trying to somehow release all of that damage & programming, it's very painful & difficult, it's not as easy as people say.....it's the past!! Yeh but deeply embedded beliefs that u don't understand or know any different, until u are lucky enough to "wake up" (A terrifying experience) from the years of not understanding, guilt, shame, confusion, rejection, mistrust, failure etc, etc etc & now a journey of trying to change my whole mindset & limiting beliefs, how do u do that after 52 years?? It's not an over night job!! Very overwhelming & have lost myself i can't even count, But know i must keep trying to be who ever i am supposed to be, LOVE MYSELF FIRST.....how ever u do that!!!😔 ❤🙏
@@pure-pisces9470
It's been a year since that comment and after reading it now, I'm not sure who that person is any more.
That relationship was a catalyst for my drastic change
I've grown so much, I'm so much happier now, most of my insecurities disappeared, I had to look at myself in an honest way, realising my mistakes and make the changes.
The biggest change, I refuse to be the victim in my life.
For now I'm not dating, working on healing, enjoying time with my children and giving myself permission to be happy.
Please don't let your past and childhood dictate your future. Anytime I have a negative thought of myself, I catch it immediately and direct it into positive.
I'm not saying that I'm completely healed by I'm truly on the way.
You sound like a strong person with great insight into your life and I'm sure that you can find a way to heal and come out stronger
Warmest wishes
Marina
Gosh, everything you say here I am doing! When you begin to love yourself, you wear it too and others notice it! Its like you begin to glow. Awesome video!!!
Antonio Borrello you're welcome!
Immediately after my 25 year marriage ended, I became involved with a woman that was very skilled in hiding most of her flaws. Her baggage appeared as slightly above the norm, but the way she presented herself and becoming what I wanted was her first priority. Then came an abnormal drive and pressure for me to marry when I was trying to recover from divorce. I was smitten with her, but deep in my heart knew her goals were a lifestyle and not pure love for me as a man. The relationship ended badly after betrayal and was difficult for me to experience another failure within 3 years of a failed marriage. Please love yourself first before attempting to give yourself to another. There's no way around it. Become that complete person on your own before moving forward, You are worthy!
So true
Very good and practical advice
"Be that complete person on YOUR OWN before moving forward". This is the exact realization that came to mind this morning. A Divine revelation indeed ✊🙏🙏🙏🙏
I am close to 60 years old and I NEVER understood this concept. Thank you for explaining self-love.
I don’t know why self love is so difficult. I have been tell myself what I can offer and that I am enough and worth being loved, but my negative thoughts about myself still show up and take over.
I do not, but I heard meditation and yoga helps.
You are a very caring man. Big heart too!
I can't thank you enough. May God always show you the true path.
I recently left a guy because he couldn’t get it through his head he needed to treat me well. Thank you Dr.
Again, my grandmother always told me that to love a person , you must first love yourself unconditionally. When she passed I got a tat of the Celtic heart that represents unconditional love, to remind me daily to love myself and be self accepting and realistic expectations of who I am. To love another I learned to nurture myself and be happy in my own body. It takes work each day and acceptance. So happy to see that this is a high priority of good relationships.
Have bn in a toxic relationship for sometime and what makes me hate myself now is that I can't resist this man, he goes silent for sometime then boom he comes back and I still give in to him, am tired of this cycle its draining me totally
Have you looked up narcissism? Him.not you.
Sounds like a trauma attachment. Something about this person’s behaviour towards you and treatment of you sounds like it’s diminished your self-worth which has started a trauma attachment. You are worth far more than that. Say to yourself ‘what decisions would I make today if I loved myself?’. I doubt you’d let that person back in.
Seeing this video makes my life better from today I lack self love and I think it’s the reason I’m having disappointments in my relationships
Self love is very important in the past I would hang around now I can see it coming and leave immediately thank you
Thank you, the parent/child comparison was so helpful in seeing how I have been neglecting my own self-love 💖
This was a great video. When we don’t love ourselves, we tend to get in bad relationships. I did, but I am becoming my best friend. I have boundaries concerning who can be in my world, and getting to know my true authentic self. Thank you for all you do!
I have struggled with this all my life ... This was a great listen and timely 💝
I was just used to get hurt from past relationship. Last one was an abusive verbal abuse. He didn't care. And my family was try to me. But I didnt realize how he was until the covid 19 and saw his true colors. Thanks for your videos. It help me & with of try to love myself. So hard for me! I'm used to get hurt. But im gonna change that! Be stronger than I ever been!!
I’ve been friends with people who mistake my kindness and soft spoken nature for weakness. Over the years I have given into them. Well not anymore! Oh hell no! I am awesome and am ready to live and walk in it.
I’ve just come out of a relationship with the love of my life . All you’ve mentioned in your video clip about having love from a parent, I, my sister and my brother didn’t have any from our parents, this week I have contacted a local NHS organisation so they can help me to deal with my issues
Ive always been drawn to party people, alcoholics etc. They see I am also not looking after and caring for myself by drinking and being unhealthy and it always causes relationship issues.
I also overcompensate in relationships. And in the end the partner says 'the attraction is no longer there'
Thank you for this video. It taught me so much.
Stayed in the lovership and he lead me to learn about self respect and love which is why I are watching this video... thankyou..I'm learning..
Amazing video!! I saw myself in a lot of what you expressed! I made the wrong decision to approach a guy again, that didn't work out the first time, to try again.. What was I thinking!! Things were actually worse this time, his unavailability and excuses were excessive..unless they were on his time, when it was convenient with him! It was a light bulb moment.. I decided quickly to end things for the last time! Used self love to do this, and I have never felt more respect for myself! Ended things over a text... Which I don't recommend, but his unavailability to talk left me no other choice. Left, with my head held high, explaining my reasons, not blaming either one, just saying things were not meant to be with us. I did not allow his behavior to compromise my value and integrity. Thank you for sharing this video! Enjoy your topics and content very much!
We do the things that we ought to be not doing because we failed to see that greater things are yet to come... we are stuck on the thought that this one is for us when in fact its not! Its not wrong to fight for that relationship but learn to let go if needed to. You are far more valuable to settle for anything less... you are loved... you are beautiful... you are worthy! God bless❤️
This video has to be one of my favorites on RUclips! I love that you have the credentials and life experiences as a relationship coach! My favorite coach. Thank you, Dr. Antonio!
Yes Antonio I was in a relationship for 18 years.. I treated him like gold. He treated me badly. Why did I hang in so long? I think I thought he would change, he didn’t. I have a beautiful relationship now.. a man who adores me.. but I’m doing for him. He does for me too. But I’m afraid he will start to take advantage of my goodness and pull back. Jeez so hard!!!!
Wow, your words in the end about ignoring the intuition, really struck me. I didn't realise how much I needed to hear it from someone else before seeing this video. Thank you.
Dr. Borrello you are the very best relationship Coach you teach people to value themselves First
Been there so many times and now I am here. Trying to learn how to love myself. It still hurts but, maybe I just have to accept it. Thank you for this video. Keep safe.
I cant still dating someone else because i still have feeling to my ex...just im going to do its watching Antonio Borrello youtube so its cleared my mind what im going to...this video help me a lot
Thanks for posting your videos..they're helping me out building back my self again .I'm learning how to love myself again after giving my all to him...for him all I did was nothing..well.. goodbye to him..i dont need him in my life
I'm 36 and just now learning about self love and learning to love me for me. It effects relationships for sure when you dont love yourself
This is the best Self-love video I have seen
This is a great video,self love is a definition of mental strength.if you love your self first definitely you be able to commit a healthy relationships.because it strarts with you.
I had depression and anxiety from childhood and took medicine while I was only 8 years old for 2 years . All my life I had anxiety then since 5 years ago I got panic attack went to see physiactist and phycologist then knew that I am also bipolar and borderline disorder. All of them are under control with medicine. But sometimes panic attack returns. Anyway I am in 3 years relationship which it goes now to bad place. By the way I watched most of the video and started act as you advice and wait to see what happens. Thanks for all your effort to post such useful videos. I appreciate that.
I have been in a long time relationship and we are together in one roof. But it feels like he doesn't want nor need me. There are times I feel that he care about me but most of the time, it feels like he was just looking for a right time to get out on a relationship. We don't fight, but its been years and I still can't feel that he was committed. It feels like he was there physically, but not emotionally. And I feel like I have wasted years of waiting for him to treat me the way I deserve to be.
👍 self love is innocent and important it mean you care if your own well being in happiness. Postive optimism.
Self attachment
self reguard
Self trust
self understanding
Inner peace
Self help
Self love
self high value
Self trust
self involved
self works self defense
self kindness
Self nutriting
Self guided
Self educated
Self forgiveness
self spiritual awakening
self control
self progress
self worthy
self qualified self service
self visionary
self reflection
self believe
self heal
self belief
self faith
self acceptance
self like
Self worth
Self knowing
Self caring of heath
Self confidence
self high esteem
self value
self respect
Self decisions
Self choices
Self spend time of yourself at times.
Self stand up for myself.
Thanks so ooooo much Dr for all the beautiful videos my boyfriend was also a psychologist with attachment style it was a roller coaster I was able finally to take self esteem and respect then walk away
I love your videos. Antonio I’m a caretaker, I love to do for my man. Years and years Iv done that. Iv been wrong. I tell my kids I’m going to take care of ME!!! They say I’m selfish. I don’t know what to do. I’m really understanding what you are saying. It’s so clear what you are saying. It’s implementing that is hard.💙
One of the best relationship coach i’ve watched here in RUclips. You use easy terms and make us (viewers) comprehend with your advices and insights efficiently. You’ve helped me a lot, may God bless you more! 💟
Self love is honoring yourself
This video really made my day
It saved me going to a psychiatrist
Cse i really deny what i see is damaging .. just to do what my heart tells me ..
And the result is more damaging than i really imagined ..
I really love all of your videos ..
I love these videos. They do help me a lot especially this one. I've been talking to a guy over texting and honestly, I'm really not even for sure how he feels. In some ways, he seems like he's interested then other times, he doesn't. If i don't text him all day, he'll send me a message at night. I'm socially awkward, I'm a complete introvert, just got out of an abusive marriage about a year ago and i do have a hard time loving myself and am almost tempted just to be with anyone who will have me and its wrong. I don't want to be that way.
You are puting me back to love my self again
Thank you for making this video. I know a young man who needs this lesson and as his friend I couldn't have said it better than you. So thanks again
Thank you Doctor, the explanation was clear and concise, perfect. I need to practice self love in order to trust myself in a new relationship.
Hi, thank u for ur video. I agree that self-love & dignity are the best gifts u can give to yourself. I was brought up by a narcissistic mum who destroyed me. I don't know what true love is. Sadly, I married a man just like her( with her encouragement). It took me many years to realise what has happened to me. Today, I try to love myself as much as I can. I also enjoy my own company.
So glad I found your channel. I really want to make progress with self love. Being my own best friend is a great advice. Thanks for your content
Sometimes you know what to do but if, instead of coming up with a justification to do it, you recognize you know what’s the right thing to do, but you’re not ready to do that just yet is the most compassionate and successful decision. Let me explain... This acceptance of where you are and where you need to be, or acceptance of your limitations, is like signing up for a marathon but allowing yourself 3 months to train for it and finish it instead of not being able to finish at all.
You know what to do, you get ready, you come up with a plan, and you make sure to get out successfully the first time without setbacks or self doubt. Great topic! .
When I was watching this video it was 11.11pm. Exactly when I heard you saying love yourself. Thank you for the video.
Even at my time in life this video hit home always being a caregiver. Wondering if l am an empath, l want to thank you dr Antonio. You are excellent. I cannot thank you enough. Sincere regards. Bobble R
Antonio I always feel guilty for everything and with everyone and I can never never never forgive myself for so many things
Oh my goodness! This is hands down the most helpful video I have ever seen. Took notes all the way through & am reviewing all of this content to put it into practice. I just wanted to say thank you for explaining and sharing. This is so valuable, and I know it’s going to make a significant difference for me, and for many others who are able to access this material. Keep up the excellent work!
I didi something aweful and it became a huge problem between me and my fiancee and his family. Later on, I realized my mistakes and did an apology but he doesn't want us to get back together even thougj I already reached out and told him I want him back. I also cannot move out yet because of quarantine due to Covid threat. Each day I see him, I know I still love him and I will still choose to be with him because we have already built a life together and I still want to give it a try.
Thank you and. Yes very helpful got got into a relationship because I thought he was different from other men but it turns out after 5 years he's still the same as any other man
Hello doctor! I just watched this today, July 5, 2020.. and I am sooo happy because I really find this so helpful! I really had hoped that I saw this years ago when you published this.. this might save me from my past relationship and save my new relationship from giving a heartbreak 💔 i am sooo stupid back then! This is what i really need to hear.. thank you sooo much! I hope to hear more from you and may you continue to help people about self love.. I am really blessed. God bless you, doc!
Do you need help sweetheart???
I recommend you to a powerful man who can help you solve your relationship problem completely without delay sweetie ❤️🌹✔️ he helped me few days ago. He can help you sweetie
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i am in a bad marrried for 7 years. always covermind and let the husband take me for granded until i watch a lot of video from you. understand myself more. Im going to walk aways from it
Thank you a lot. i love your video.
Thanks you. This is exactly what I need..I discovered my husband took a second marriage, I was hospitalized closer to death & miracly granted a second life., I still tried to give a chance knowing this is part of our religion, but I found out being disrespected, that love has gone even since 5yrs ago I was already feeling unsecured with him., maybe I kept staying in this marriage because of my family loyalty & values..now I started to love someone, but is also a complicated due to distance and communication barrier...now I started to just embrace myself, a self-care, gym and reading alot., I'm Still with my stupid husband due to pandemic limitations, I am Very dependent to him even I'm working in our company he taking control our finances... One day, when this pandemic ends I want to travel somewhere for a new beginning...
I contact him for all kinds of problem including saving your marriage or relationship from divorce,
V I a W h a t s A p p
Dr wilson willock he is the best is 💯 percent sure
Thank you so much,for sharing self-esteem,self value,bcuz right now I am in situation that relationship injured of actions,behaviour,and by words,I'm about loosing my worth and love myself even uncontrolled mindset in times of angerness attach specially when times ,my hormones are an imbalance I am thankful ,watching some of your advice it really help me a lot,and just right now I'm back myself for being me just before,to love myself and value God bless your channel more people lives will touch and learn
I never understand this self love stuff!! had to watch this video 5 times. The final time I decided to pause it throughout And take thorough notes. I finally get it. I always want what's best for others, but neglect myself. This was extremely helpful, seeing yourself as your child you're taking care of or as your best friend. How would I act towards THEM? That was an eye opener. Thank you for this. ♥️
Thank you for clearly explaining self love. Its good to finally understand exactly what it is. I really appreciate this video. I find it extremely helpful. You're a star and a great communicator.
Dr Antonio you are really amazing Psychologist.
Thumbs up for u
@@AntonioBorrello you really deserve respect.Your vast knowledge regarding relationship is appreciated.
I am in this situation and getting alot of help from your videoes.I was in depression and suddenly watched your video and came back to normal mental state.
Self love equals self respect!
In relationship I knew even it's bad I still choose to live it in because I think one day he will change and treat me well
I like that advise that you said of treating your self like a friend .Sometimes I let things happen in my relationship and I ilerate that even though it's bad . Sometimes I feel jeloues of my partner and like u said it's bad .and I tolarte that on me becouse sometimes I felt like saying to how I feel would change but his anger is just 0 tolerance and when he does this .make mad because I feel he doesn't give a crap how I feel and makes me a person that I don't want to be .so am going to practice self love on my self and see how that goes and not say stuff like you love me and things like that and just love what I do .
Thank you doctor, now I can focus on myself more .
I am going to start self love.. thanks a lot for this video Antonio
I love all your videos on relationships, I been with a guy for 15 yrs and he started driving trucks, he is not a local driver, and he be gone a wk and when he get back home , he be at home for that night, maybe 2 nights, then he turn right back around and go back out. I really never wanted to deal with a truck driver and I told him that before he took this job, but we had been together about 5yrs then so I went on and accepted that, but I just don’t get enough time, and he is full of excuses, and I’m tired of it, I sure have been hoping things would change but it haven’t. I just got into it becuz I simply ask him some questions about something I wanted to know, wasn’t nothing bad but he went out west with it, and said somethings about my mother and sons and I don’t appreciate it and I let him know that. I would never say nothing about his mother just becuz I got mad at him, so what I done was block him off my phone, I feel free that I’m not talking to him, I miss talking to him but I’m not putting up with his behavior, this not the first time he did it. I love him but I’m not going to deal with this becuz I ask questions about something I wanted to know, plus he make no time for me, it’s all about that truck he drive. Please give me some advice..
I was still with him although the relationship was toxic, thanking he will change (and I really truly loved him but at the end I had to move on.
You loved him. Or what you wanted him to be?
I’m actually in a relationship that has torn me emotionally it has brought my self-esteem down my confidence is down because he constantly compares me to someone else tells me he wants me to be like that person in order for us to be in a relationship I listen to your video and you have A lot of healthy tips how do I get my confidence and build up my self-esteem I want to walk away from this person how can I walk away.
The main reason why I stay around people and relationships that make me sick is because I think I am building resilience and that I'm trying to be more understanding and learn not to run away when things get tough (basically making sure I'm not a spoilt brat! Haha). But very recently I started talking back to myself and saying it's ok to walk away after I've tried so much. It's still hard and I haven't completely practiced it but I started the serious talk, so I'm closer to be strong enough to do it!
Yh I been there coz I’m thinking one day he will change and he will know my worth 🥺
This is such an important video. Thank you for this work Dr. Antonio❤
Terrific video, Antonio. Please continue making them!
I certainly need to practice self-love
Short but packed with useful information!
oh my so specific!!!I really appreciate this..need this so much..i want to be ready to what the universe will give me so I need this to have the best foundation in receiving..love lots more power
First of all I love your channel. And I believe you are right about self love. I am learning to love myself first, and I find that it makes a difference in my dating life. I may not always find the right person right away but I will see myself reflected in how much he likes himself. I have yet to find the person who reflects in what I love in myself should be important in him as well. I get excited when I see the person who does take care of himself. But I can put down the dating and go Pursue other activities. But when I do find someone I find interesting and it doesn’t work, i am not disappointed I am excited to learn about someone new. But loving myself puts up boundaries for bad behaviours from other people. I am learning new things through your messages. I notice behaviours I didn’t see was there. My next relationship will be positive and it helps to have someone with learned knowledge give out information. Thank you for being there. 👍
This video helped me out alot about understanding myself a bit more. I knew there was something in my life that was missing and that was being able to understand myself and being able to be me rather than trying to be the person everyone else or more specifically my ex wanted me to be.
Thank you! I wished I had listened to this with my last relationship
Great video, sometimes we don't realize we are attracted to the wrong guy. Low self esteem comes from a childhood with no love. I tend to try to prove I'm worthy over and over. I don't give in so I loose a lot of guys. But that is a sign they're not for me. I always seem to feel like I'm begging to be loved. I hate the way that feels. I know I need help.
It’s very hard to practice self love me personally being honest here it is extremely hard to ignore the in denial voice in our heads even if we know what is truly right and what we truly deserve. To self love.. easier said then done. I say if your going to love or be in a relationship make sure you do with with caution ⚠️ because you are up for a ride. 😐I really love your video though very inspiring and touching. Wish me luck. Just getting out of a relationship. Time to focus on myself and find my self love that I’ve slowly lost because of getting heartbroken multiple times 💔
This is so so extremely hard to do. Trying really hard to love myself because can't find love. I just can't. And won't unless I practice this. Just wish I knew more about how to do it.
The illustration based on psychology makes your video special. :)
Thanks a lot.
Self love now i understand it...This comes after my partner told me that i don't love my self...before that she had been telling me,she needs time alone and not even seeing someone else even her parents..with this, i have been in a vaccum, insecurities being at high rate and alot of stress...need more of your advice cause i fear loosing her
I actually have started to learn more about loving myself and all that I would like to find not only in myself but in that special person. I have found that my spiritual beliefs limit me in the dating field and it used to bother me alot, but now I wont compromise in this area of my life. Definitely have learned that this is where I have found my identity, self love, and taking care of myself more. Where I still need to be stronger Is not staying in a relationship if its unhealthy. Sometimes it has been easy and others not so much. I love the test for Best Friends. I am glad that you have been talking about these tests that we can utilize, because I have done these just in different ways. I hope that you all find "The One" but mostly you find your true beauty and value as well. Thank you for posting this , it really made me feel better ❤ Many Blessings to you all,
Carol
Dr Borello is super intelligent, he give clear explanation. Thanks I'm a new subscriber.💜I'm going to apply all his advice in my life. And I'll be a better version of myself. I love your episode " how to be happily single.💜
We are our own worst critic! Love how you said take the best friend approach. Giving yourself the advice you'd give your best friend. DING DING DING💜
(Side note.. I often wonder if you find it hard to turn of the psychologist in you? From the outside its like, he's successful, handsome, probably funny.. .And single. Single? I chuckled thinking, How many times has he heard, stop psychoanalyzing me. Turn off Dr Antonio!
Pro..you give dating advice...Con..You give dating advice. Knowing why someone does something or acts a certain way, must be hard for you I think of the strangest things.)
Another great video, Thank you!
Well hello there! You mean the voicingvit out loud part? You know you totally think it 100% of the time .. 🤣😂
See, I'm totally right :) 😛
Yes yes yes. Been waiting for you to post this video. I have been doing a few of these steps. Can I share your links in my group next week. You been a real eye opener and your amazing to break everything down so we can all understand and help ourselves 😘
I am
Very well done. Thanx. More of these type of self help videos would be good please. 💕
So much compact information in this video. Of course I know most these things, but hearing them from you is very helpful.Thank you very much.
I've recently watched a few of your videos. I find them wonderful and insightful. I have a young daughter. It would be nice if you included single parents as a new perspective to all of the videos you've already created.
Great video. I think this topic is important and dosent get talked about enough.
Love your self
Wow !wow! wow! am hear in 2020,i literally like how he deeply explains self-love like its now easy for me to understand 😘
Wonderful video, thank you so much! Good reminder.
I find these tips really helpful and effective. I did try it and it is working for men I had relationships with. Too bad I just became very busy. So I end up having no time for any now. But so far, if you love yourself, it's not that hard to eliminate those people not willing to stay. Keep it up girls!😘😘😘😘
Thanks for sharing!
You talk about many of the same subjects as other coaches, but I really like your approach and the perspective you specifically give on the topics. :)
Different but highly important topic