A Therapist Answers Questions You're Too Afraid To Ask
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- Опубликовано: 20 сен 2024
- "What's the best way to break up with a therapist you're not clicking with?"
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EXTERNAL CREDITS
Sam Rader
www.samraderph...
Wish I could do that with a teacher at school, "I'm sorry, I'm clear that you and I are not a match and this will be our last session today"
lol 😄
Sammeeee
Emul Me too ugh
same
Lol same
Wow. There is a reason this lady is a therapist. I mean this video gave me these really calm vibes..
GeekyGrace 10 I think it's the voice. It's just... Soothing...
GeekyGrace 10 Ikr, I would love it for her to be my therapist
GeekyGrace 10 The music helps too.
asmr
IKR
Therapist: How are you today?
Me: G-
Therapist: *writes a thesis*
Me: **has no right to add on because I don't go to a therapist so I'm not going to add on because that would ve somewhat disrespectful to the people who do have therapists or phyciatrists**
Therapist: have a good day, bye
Me: thanks you too, bye.
Therapist: finishes up their five page essay about how I was doing.
I'M SORRY BUT I LOVE THE GUY WHO DIDN'T LIKE MUSICALS TOO AND I LOVE YOUR PROFILE PICTURE AND USERNAME
what is this business because he thinks you're a G!
IS THAT PROFESSOR HIDGENS I SEE!!!!
I had one friend, who, any time I cried she would say, "your eyes have bladders too, and sometimes you just have to pee it out." Which would always make me laugh, but also feel like my emotions and/or bodily functions were normal and ok. 💜
Doctor T. J. Eckleburg this is actually really cute lol
Doctor T. J. Eckleburg
😹😹 your friend sounds amazing
1) I'm using this
2) Can I meet that friend please
😂😂😂
Doctor T. J. Eckleburg youmsaid "had"what happened to that friend???
Doctor T. J. Eckleburg haha
Afraid to ask? More like can't afford to ask. $$$
Well
Not in germany 👋
Dont you have health care or something? In my country you don't have to pay if you're under 18, depending on the kind you get and whether or not the government pays for that kind.
From personal experience: The idea that therapy/ counseling is not covered by insurance is bull. It depends on the specific plan you have, but mine does cover it. Idk about employer provided plans, but the blanket statement is incorrect
Ce-Sur yes but in germany you wait mooooonths or even a year for a therapist, even if it’s urgent
Lol true
She's such a sweetheart, I wish she was my therapist....she would help me through so much
Lina A. A lot of therapists use video calling to reach clients outside of their home area. So that could be a possibility.
Shaneka Wallace would you say that therapists have "patients" or "clients", i would say patient because of the fact that they who goes to the therapist seeks "medical" help. Whats ur thought?
Its different at a Psycologist and a Psycotherapist.
Ludvig Anderstedt my psychology professor told me that we shouldn't call them patient to their face. It makes a lot of people uneasy.
Lina A. Eh...Don’t expect too much Lina. Because whenever it comes to finding help especially from therapist. They are there to assist and listen and there is less judgement.
It would be nice to have her as your therapist. Sometimes becoming a therapist requires them to find ways of therapy.
Like finding what helps you with your difficulties.
I love her, especially what she said about being honest with your therapist as a way to break through.
r u idiot?
Alfonso Núñez no, are you?
no, are you?
Alfonso Núñez why do you consider the original commenter to be an idiot?
+Ludvig Anderstedt well its not necessarily wrong it just depends on the approach you have to psychology. This is an issue of nature vs. nurture and maybe it is worth to go back to your family life and see if anything shaped you to be a certain way. I don’t know just something to think about because psychology is so broad and there are so many different interpretations that a lot of things aren’t necessarily wrong just whatever works for you my dude. Except freud he was incredibly wrong.
She looks so nice, and her voice is so soothing
Silke_999 ikr
yeah ! :D
Silke_999 ikr can she be my therapist??
Honestly, the way that she speaks rather annoys me.
I hate that kind of soft voice it bugs me so much I hope I never start talking like that
When she said "Not getting enough hugs" I literally burst into tears
I kinda have phobics... its complicated, but i cant get touched without freaking out... the thing is i really wanted to get hugged or stuff like that, but i just cant
Indiana Jonas I understand completely!! Like even if it’s people I know won’t hurt me and love me it still makes me uncomfortable and that makes me sad that I can’t hug them without feeling awkward about it like I never used to be very affectionate, but whenever I used to hug people it felt nice and comforting and now it’s just the opposite
@@indianajonas5565 SAMEEEEE
@@cam0987 It sucks... my friends are like: yeah just get a hug and in always like: wish it would be that easy...
I don’t know what I’d do if someone hugged me. It’s been so long since anyone has done it, that I have no idea how I’d react.
What she said about *NO GOSSIP* 🙌🏽👍🏽👌🏼
Cassandra Bankson woah! I'm so suprized you're commenting from this youtube channel! I just wanted to say that you bring a positive impact into my life. Lol i have been dealing with acne for 8 years, but I am doing my best to fight it. Also good luck with your dermatologist future career! I saw a clip of you from "the doctors" show on youtube.
Remi Lloyd I agree!
Yes!!! I swore off gossip after high school, just reflecting back realizing it had created a culture among my friend circle where we'd just dwell endlessly on negative things, sometimes about one another, and subsequently eroded friendships.... and for what? I've relapsed here and there but honestly when i just ignore the impulse to gossip i feel so much better about myself and the world , and also there are SO many more interesting things to talk about!!! it's sad people don't get that ever.
Gossip is one of the things that can almost instantaneously trigger me into a massive depressive episode. At one point I had made such incredible progress and was coming so far until I caught wind of horrible gossip about me in a circle of friends who I thought I could trust, and it set me back almost to square one.
Please don’t gossip. It’s far more damaging than most people realize. 💔
yEP
Her voice is soo soothing
Melissa Pichardo I hate that word so much
Holden from the catcher in the rye? Lol
She sounds just like Khloe Kardashian.
MonAdieu I hate that you pointed that out because you're not wrong.
Not really tbh
My mum doesn't believe I'm depressed cause I don't have "real" problems
My mom is the same way and she also says that their is no need for therapy and pills because it’s all in your head and you just need to “think happy thoughts and learn to deal with it”
Randa So that means she doesn't believe in depression?Because depression is a VERY REAL PROBLEM.
Randa I wish you luck upon getting help!:0
Same but it's my dad
Your mother sounds like a real problem.
massage therapist: w-why are you crying
me: I dOnT kNOw
SAME
this comment underrated😭
Big Oop
How I break up with a psychologist, I just stop going. I basically ghost them.
Aimee Elisha that is VERY unhealthy for you
Sagarika Uday is it? I did the same thing and im completely ok with it.
Ashwati Khanduri I think so. Because ghosting a professional might only build negative feelings about other people who are going to take their place
I'm sorry but that doesn't make any sense to me. It's better I ghost a therapist and find a new one than stick with a crappy one.
Aimee Elisha I agree with changing a therapist and it is vital for progress. All I'm saying is that ending on a positive note by speaking it out might help both the sides.
i’m not scared to talk to a therapist- i’m just scared to tell my parents that i want to...
Tea Bug im scared of both so im fucked
@@-lemonmilk-7726 why are you scared to talk to a therapist?
Both I'm scared to ask my parents but the last time I saw one I lied cuz I felt they would jude me I know they won't mut my bodie won't let me
Same
Same
What hit me the most was at 2:00.I cry for no apparent reason sometimes
*1:55
Ripper 1 SAME
Same
REMEMBER U R VERY STRONG BUT SOMETIMES U ABSORB MORE THAN YOUR BODY CAN TAKE SO ITS OKAY TO CRY AS IT MAKES U STRONG AGAIN.💝💝💝👍👍👍
Ripper 1 me too
My question is WHAT THE HECK DO THEY WRITE DOWN ON THAT PAPER
*lowkey doodles stick figures*
Notes so they can give feedback next session and try to develop methods that will help you personally.
Ask to see the notes if they haven't explained what they will be writing down or why. You have a right to be able to see information pertaining to yourself.
they also write what you said so if they have multiple patients they won't forget, thats what my therapist told me at least
probably something on lines, what a loser.
I hate it when people speak to a crowd or the general public, like this video, for example say say adamantly that "You ARE loved!" OR "You are NOT alone!" Or similar such things. I get that people who really do have support systems don't feel like they do if they are depressed or having similar issues. But seriously, there are people out there who really are alone and unloved by others. Those people need to hear how about how to cope with that fact and constantly hearing people say these things only drives it deeper that even the experts really don't have a grasp on how bad their situation is and therefor cannot help them.
In my opinion, a more appropriate phrase is to say you are capable of being loved implying that there is opportunity out there for people to love you, friends, family, total strangers, etc... but I agree saying you are loved unconditionally is a blanket statement that is not true for many people out there though there is opportunity for them to be loved and cherished.
I completely agree. There are people who are all alone and it's not fair to them to say that they're loved because it just estranges them more.
April Thomas
No one is unloved but there are people who are unloved by the people around them
But yes there are people who are alone
April Thomas that’s not true. Your never alone. You have God and yourself. Gods love is the strongest love. And chances are there is someone who love you
Andrew s in my opinion that's more sad because many a times it's about waiting and waiting and waiting, so even when an opportunity does knock on our doors, we feels it's after eternity. And, when it doesn't, it feels it was foolish to think so. I don't like the statement, just my take on it, though.
My two favorite psychology quotes from my professor:
"There's a wide range of normal."
-
"It's not a problem until it's a problem."
I know this is unrelated but her hair is absolutely gorgeous 😍
"it's probably safe to tell most employers" HAHAHAHAHA no
niffler09 bad job
I think she's right. Most people have struggled with it at some point, so most are understanding.
amiablehacker it's not a good idea to mention it during the job interview tho
They'll dismiss what you're saying, dismiss your feelings, & ignore all of it. They'll think you're a troublemaker & just making excuses.
Anne Marie Exactly. I know a few people who’ve been looked down upon because of their mental illnesses from employers
Psychology is so awesome 😃I love how it can help people, to better understand them and so that they can better understand themselves. ❤️
Hound Life Vlogs yea I don't even think I need a therapist because I'm not really depressed and I don't have anxiety or anything but I just think it would be so cool to have someone to talk to for even the smallest problems and knowing that the person won't ever tell anyone unless you say it's ok
Hound Life Vlogs why you are on every vid i watch wtf
The Diamond Boos seeing a counseling psychologist might be right for you! Counselors are there to better help you and your mental health regardless if you have a mental illness or not. I think it's great that you like the idea as I believe it's so pivotal that we all see a therapists from time to time. After all, we all go through bad moments and just as we see a dermatologist when our skin is bad, we also should go see a therapist when something major is wrong or just for a "check up". Sorry for the long answer :)
ivanorange wow thank you! This could really help me with all those little things that get me down and stress me out throughout the day. I have been to like a school councelor and I always feel better whenever I do
Severe depressed woman approves this :)
Anyone who is scared of death? i am, and i might have multiple panic attacks a week. I'm scared of heart attacks, brain problems, all that... it really takes all my energy. One day i couldn't eat, and i felt like dying.
Emppos I'm scared of death, the fact that we don't know what is after drives me crazy and I get panic attacks when I think about it, but the other stuff you talked about I don't relate sorry
Emppos i have the same problem, but remember this; do you really want to spend your whole life worrying about what comes after it? You should enjoy it and live life to the fullest right now :)
I have that same problem and I have suffered with having an existential crisis severely
I never been scared of death besides what's there to worry about
Absolutely. That has been the basis of my anxiety attacks since I was very little.
Unpopular opinion, but if you are not open to the idea of helping yourself and constantly telling yourself you cant change because its a chemical imbalance then you’ll never get better. And I’m speaking from someone who has suffered trauma, ocd/anxiety and depression. it is 100% possible to change your way of thinking to treat yourself. its not easy, but it is possible! :)
Hailey Gallinari completely agree
This is so important!
Yes exactly!!
this comment is so underrated. I agree 10000% and I’ve been through the same stuff also.
Ugh, this needs to be pinned at the top of this comment sectionnnnnnn
I don't find the comments "join the club" and "everybody has been there" very helpful. When I hear "it's just a state of mind" it translates to "it's all in your head"
Sasha Penn I think shes trying to come across as, you’re not alone and that we’re all in this together
Depression is in your head, just like any pain. Pain is brain signals, in your head. And for some, separating the depression from their person is helpful. It can help then understand that they aren't defined by it. I don't think she means it like "get over it". More like "your mind can change, this is temporary, there are people to help you".
she wan't referring to actual mental illness when she said that, though- she was talking about basic stress that everyone feels, like when you can't find your keys & you're in a rush. that's normal & so many ppl go through that, not like constant anxiety like 'im not good enough,' etc.
I couldn't believe she said that! Depression is a mental illness, she's delusional to think it's just a state of mind!
With depressed/anxious patients you might be walking a very thin line between reassuring them that it's not all in their head but also not letting them believe it can't change, so I think she was trying to tread somewhere in the middle. In actual therapy, you'd gauge what to say depending on which side your patient seem to be on, "this defines me/I can't change" vs "am I making it up?". This topic doesn't do well for general advice because it always depends on the person. She did her best though
wow. i wish she had her own channel lol.
Samantha Rader heyyy
@Samantha Rader Make a channel!!!!!
Yes!!!
You should check out Kati Morton’s channel! She is a therapist and makes many videos like this!
I love Ken music he is a great singer and dancer
My boyfriend had depression for over a year before we started dating, and he wanted to ask me out, but he heard my friend say that I don't like negative people. So, he got himself out of it just to be with me. I found this out today and now I'm trying to learn more about depression and what he went through.
Captain Swan ooooh waaw such a story
I dont think you can “get out of it” so quickly. But its so considerate of you to actually inform yourself about his issues! Way to go!
Not sure how he"got himself out of it" but kudos to him mustering up the strength.
She's SO pretty omg
I wish Jonghyun had somebody like you to help him.
Dürdane Ayten I agree..hopefully he found the peace he'd been looking for and is well
Dürdane Ayten :(
🌹
He did what he did for a reason. It was in fact his choice. Many of us wish he was back with us, but I bet he has finally reached the happiness and serenity that he seeked for. 🌹 😔
GummySugaSmile I was a fan after his death, but this comment was beautiful. I believe that after death, there’s no heaven or anything, it’s just an eternal peace. I hope he has reached this.
I'm aware that I need therapy, but I'm just too afraid to go for it. The sweetness of this lady made me feel like maybe is not that bad
It's not bad as long as you don't get a bad therapist for you. I started off with some really crappy therapists which is why I hated it the first few years. Now that I have good ones it really helps me. Especially if I had a bad week.
Afraid why?
@@jasi7313 what the guy on top of you said
Therapists are amazing, I'm so grateful for them. They deserve a raise
i want her to be my mom tbh
I want her to be my girlfriend.
She’s like all great therapist!!! My therapist is incredible and all I can’t think about it how I wish she was my mom or my older sister.
Ugh me too
Basically
If you are afraid to tell your psychologist something, nothing will get accomplished and you are wasting you're $ and her time.
Thanks, not like I didnt know that or anything... Because I think that a lot. So just don't say that, please.
You are not wasting her time
If she is making money she is not wasting her time
Good thing I have insurance
Your*
I already feel bad about it, but I can't help it. I'm afraid if I tell them everything they could tell my family and that could make my depression worse. I'm trying but it's easier said than done.
I love how she’s confident and kind, hope she’s having a wonderful life 💛
I really need her as my therapist.
As someone with a depression kicking my butt at the moment, i look forward to this video!!
I used to have depression and nearly ended my life in the past.. Maybe I can help, may I ask what's bothering your mind mostly?
Line Brucz Try the book "The Untethered Soul" by Michael Singer. I recommend the audio format and you might be able to download it from the library. I'm 50 and have been on depression medication for 25 years. This book helped me see that who I really am is not my mind, my thoughts, my feelings, but instead I experience thoughts, feelings, etc. It's helped me "get out of my head" and be more aware and present.
I'm going off medication (with my doctor's knowledge and support) and seeing if I can't live each day as it happens.
Line Brucz love, watch depression: the secret we all share, it brought me some peace and understanding as to what was happening to me. I hope it brings you some light and I wish you love and light always 😘
Hey, just wanna let you know that I've been there, and there is light at the end of the tunnel. God bless you.
My psychiatrist doesn't listen to anything I say yet she claims to do psychotherapy. This made me realize exactly how much she doesn't listen. I'm unable to go to school because of my panic attacks and anxiety and her answer is "go to school" if I could I wouldn't need her help at all. I can deal with a bit of anxiety, not years of unable to do to school.
I hate that. They're supposed to help you. I went to a psychologist who would jut make me feel crap about myself. She made me feel as though I were unlovable and that people did not want to be around me. Luckily, I left there rather quickly. I am the complete opposite, people like being around me and I am extremely lovable. She broke me down even more, at a point when I was already so low that I tried to commit suicide.
So please, if you can, get someone else.
Shannon Jordan I'm definitely trying. Unfortunately, it's hard to find one that accepts new clients, adolescents, and my insurance. I'm also being rushed by the department of education because of the absenses. I've actually had a violent experience with cops and a social worker claiming to help me. They banged on my bedroom door and later pinned me on the floor to handcuff during my panic attack. They would not listen to a word I said nor allowed me to regain my composure. That's certainly no way to react to someone having one. Left me bruised and cut everywhere and horrified. They said I was resisting and mentally unstable. I was perfectly normal before they triggered my panic d/o. I guess I'm surrounded my unhelpful "help" that I can't get away from haha. I hope you're doing better now
Wow, that's ridiculous! I cannot even imagine how it must have felt. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. When people don't know how to handle things, being violent definitely isn't the answer, but it is so often what is chosen. I truly hope that you can find help in your situation, you deserve that. Thanks for the kindness, I am doing better now actually, and I know you will as well!
Psychiatrists are trained as medical doctors, then concentrate on psychiatry in their residency. They usually have limited exposure to psychotherapy because they have been trained as medical doctors. I would suggest you have a psychologist and a psychiatrist, if possible. Clinical psychologists are experts in clinical work, whereas psychiatrists are experts in the medical model and view medication as a means to helping many disorders. Yet; most mental illness get better with a combination of medication and psychotherapy.
@@TheJulietxo I'm so, so sorry you went through something like that. It is absolutely shameful, and in my mind downright evil, how we treat people with mental illness. I personally have PTSD caused by mental health people which makes getting help for it pretty much impossible.
She is so genuine
Samantha Rader it's so refreshing ❤️💕
When she said "you are loved" I actually felt annoyed.
1. It sounds like a line pulled out of a book.
2. The ones who say they love me tend to be the ones who leave the fastest or forget I'm depressed.
3. A lot of times I don't even feel like my family lives me. It's like I'm just... there. Existing in borrowed space. (Especially with my mom)
Everything else clicked except that, unfortunately. And I don't know if it's past experiences or depression that's actually having a hard time believing I'm loved.
Yeah....
But don't tell your boss and future boss you have Depression. You will never have a job again
The thought of telling my boss about my depression terrifies me. There’s no way in hell it would go well.
I told my Boss I have PTSD and was going through domestic violence and she made a meeting with my therapist about getting a restraining order and a safety. I probably won’t do this at any other job again because my boss is a really sweet,Christian humble lady. She even prayed for me and would call to check up on me when I was in the hospital. Maybe it’s because I’m 22 and she’s a much older lady and tells me I remind her of her niece. But I won’t be young and adorable forever so I definitely won’t do this at any other job
A dear friend of mine took his life years ago.
He had depression and always said that no one is really understandig him.
Till this day I wonder how he could have met that someone who understands him the next day.
And him not realizing that himself, that is Depression.
I think the difference in viewpoints is "It can happen! You could meet someone who understands you tomorrow", on one hand, and "In all the days in my life until now, it hasn't happened. What's the likeliness that it will happen tomorrow? Or ever?", on the other hand.
I’m sorry for your loss. I recently had a family member take it life and often wonder if he could see what his life might of been like today if he still would of made the choose. Sending you lots of positive thoughts.
I really needed to watch this video it helped alot!
i am not trying to be rude or whatever but it is a lot
I'm seeing a lot of people reacting really negatively to the phrase "state of mind," but *Inigo Montoya voice* I don't think it means what you think it means. It's not dismissive at all; it's a factual statement.
A state of mind could also be how you're thinking when you're drunk, for example. It's just the way you're perceiving the world, what kinds of patterns and associations you make, what kinds of things you're feeling, and how you're reacting. Your state of mind is just that: the state that your mind is in.
Yes, so many people are commenting about that part!
Samantha Rader, I just wanted to know, and I mean no harm but, were you referring to the emotion of depression or the condition of depression? the condition of depression, as in, the mental illness that is not dictated by... someone's perception of the world lol
Micheal Miko I think it's because of the poor word choices.
@@user-sg3pq6ej5d She definitely meant the condition. The condition was explained in the top comment like being drunk, and is a perception of the world. Clinical Depression is a negative perception of the world that can be caused by circumstances and/or a chemical imbalance. All of which fall under state of mind.
Exactly, on point.
I cover my emotion bucket with flex tape. The tears will never leak out that way.
Ive built a wall, no one is getting tbrough ever again
Qualifications needed for therapist
Knowledge
Being nice
And a soulful voice
There is less stigma about mental health? Not in my experience. I am very open in my life about my depression and anxiety. I had an employer try to accommodate me for this, but then wonder why when I actually had to use it. I still get those people who think they instantly know how to cure my depression. Oh, think happy thoughts? That simple, why have I been going to therapy for 3 years, silly me.
RubberDucky I hate it when people are like "tell your anxiety to go away"
People who aren't mentally ill don't really get it. It's why I had to lie to my yoga teacher and tell her I absolutely thought yoga was helping. I needed her to know I'd missed class because of anxiety, but she insisted yoga helped anxiety. So I told her that was why I stopped missing class, when in reality I finally got medication for anxiety and it was easier to show up. She then went on to tell me about how yoga was sooo much better than 'those nasty chemicals'. Sure thing lady.
Or my own mother. I told her that the leg shaking thing a lot of the family does can be related to anxiety and she told me not to call my relatives crazy. When I told her that implying I was crazy for having depression and anxiety was hurtful she pretended not to understand.
So nah, the stigma isn't gone and hell no I'm not telling my employer. Nobody needs to know my business but me.
Now that there is less of a stigma around it, there is more romanticism of it and more belittlement of it. Even when she said that and then said depression is some mere "state of mind" was an example of belittlement. I mean no harm but I didn't think a therpaist could confuse the (emotion) depression and the (condition) depression, like my mom or almost everyone I've ever opened up to about my (condition) depression. Most people in the state of the emotion of depression do not have suicidal thoughts or tendencies, meanwhile, unfortunately, too many with the condition of depression do not survive.
Me: Am I a normal person? ------ The therapist: Sorry.... I don't think so.
No one is normal. There is no such thing. Society may deem certain actions or traits as normal, but it's like saying someone is perfect. And no one is perfect
A professional would never say that
I basically said this to my therapist once. She said (basically) "But now you understand things that normal people don't, and one day when they step off the deep end off the pool, you'll be able to help them back out."
A few school counselers I have seen do not like the word "normal" at all
Normal people don't exist. Everyone is unique. If that weren't the case, we'd be able to replace the majority of the population with robots and no one would notice
she reminds me of colleen ballinger so much!!
[E&I] I know😱
OMG SHE DOES
[E&I] it's the hair I thought the same thing 🤗
[E&I] omg ikr
[E&I] LURVE her
I go to a Therapist and i got ocd, the first time i was there, he asks me whats making me nervous right now... so i told him, and he let me do my stuff, i was sorting his books alphabetically, i moved his couch and his seat on the right spot (so the room looks better), i pulled the curtains apart symmetrically and ive relocated some plants... that was kinda the best feeling ive ever had, he just let me do that and i didnt need to explain why i was doing that stuff... it was just liberating
I thought she was nice from the starting but employers won't mind? I don't know how it's like in US but hell no. There is a stigma. Even my mom feels uncomfortable about me going to therapist and having meds. I'm definitely going to keep mine secret. And srlsy, "We've all been in those dark moments. It's just state of the mind?" Do you really say that to your depressed patiens.. That's just going to make chronically depressed patients feel bad for themselves not being able to overcome 'just state of mind' which everyone got over it.
이지민 trust me, you’re right, there is still a huge stigma here in the US
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I lived in the US for most of my life and moved back to my native country (Korea) recently and although Korea has a MUCH HIGHER stigma than in the US, the US still has a lot of work to do.
how are u speaking perfect english lol
"it's a state of mind"
Is literally what mental illness is.
I don't think her "state of mind" comment was made offhand, like " get over it already." I think she means it's a different perspective of looking at the world, a shift in perspective that overwhelms us sometimes. As a person with depression, I just see it as a lack of energy and interest and the unwillingness and inability to commit to anything that this world has to offer. Some people do it so easy and for some of us it just all seems worthless.
"We've all been there. It's just a state of mind"
Everyone feels different and acts differently. There's no "We've all been there" with different mindsets, bc we can't compare our feelings and the pain.
I believe sje meant we all have feelings. Things that scare us, make us nervous, inspire us, make us happy, mad, etc. Now the LEVELS of those emotions is what I believe you're coming from varys
People might not feel 100% of what you're feeling, but they can definitely feel very, very, very similar. Also there are some people who are naturally more empathic who can sense and understand more than you realize. So you absolutely can compare feelings and pain, thinking otherwise is misguided if not outright wrong. Your statement would only be true if you were some kind of an Alien who literally thinks differently because they have a three lobed brain or something.
2:25 I'm sorry but that is VERY bad advice. There very much still is a big stigma around depression. Society doesn't want to deal with that and telling your employer that will simply cost you your job.
bloo jkl45 true
Someone gets it. You wouldn't believe the backdraft I got when I said that in a forum on Facebook. 😵🔫
People actually get unemployed because they have depression?
Sophia Manzor fot most HR. Depression = incompetent lazy person.
@Banana Howlter Legally, you can't be fired for a mental illness
"You're loved" "you're cared about" "someone wants to hear from you today" ugh i hate those words
May I ask why?
@@amalie7891 Sounds fake. And when people say they love everyone.
@@gusgrizzel8397 ok yeah I know what you mean, but I think it's still true for so many people.
But whats with the other words? Also not true for everyone.
Also, I really know how it feels to be lonely, so I care for everyone that feels the same and I would listen to anyone who wants to open up to me, doesn't matter if I know them.
Sometimes people care more for you than you think.
@@amalie7891 To me, loneliness is not helped by people patronizing or posturing. It takes common interests or ideas to have a friend. One has to make a connection. You like chocolate? You like Science Fiction? You like to run? You like Libertarians? Etc....
@@gusgrizzel8397 okay but isn't it way more valuable to have a person you connect with on a deeper level?
Because there was a time when I had a few friends I indeed shared interests with. But I could not open up to them and talk about my real, dark feelings, so I felt incredibly lonely. And then I met someone the opposite way. We don't have similar lives or interests but we had similar experiences and values and could help echother out.
I know it woul be perfect if you had both in one person. But at least you have something. Even if your daily lives aren't that compatible, you grow together and to me that is the most important thing.
This is why I want a career in psychology. It’s so great to understand why people feel or do the things they do and helping others understand that.
She has such a soothing voice :) I can hear her talk all day
I was feeling this until she said "it's just a state of mind." Understatement of the century. What about the physical manifestations? She should have at least mentioned that.
I was depressed for a very long time and got no help, after a few years I developed chronic fatigue syndrome. I'm still struggling with it today. Moral of the story is: always get help as soon as possible.
I'm glad to know I wasn't the only one offended by that statement. It's not like you can snap out of it...like boredom.
ConfettiCurls the same
Maybe because IT IS a state of mind, NOT a state of being. Once people realize that, then they can begin the process of healing out of it. Depression is not something that you are just stuck with for life and meant to deal. If someone told you that they lied to you.
Mei yeah those are psychosomatic symptoms that physically manifest themselves based on your mental illness and how you cope. For instance, if you cope poorly- or unhealthily- you might get constant headaches, feel stressed, irritated, tired, with stomach aches and tense muscles.
Please.... you didn't go nearly as deep/dark as you should have... This was a perfect opportunity to do the world an insanely revolutionary favor, something that has never been done before. Like answering the questions you can't legally ask without going to jail or getting taken away and placed in a psych ward. Technically you would be talking to millions of would-be patients that are probably too scared to ask in real life and get genuine advice/help without getting taken away. Like the questions that are often never asked before hand because they know they will get in trouble if they do ask... so it is often too late by the time you figure it out. And there is no way to stop it because there is no way to get them to tell you or actually open up truthfully before hand with the process we have today. Like people actually feeling suicidal. When you go to a doctor or counselor/psychiatrist, the way they ask the question makes you feel like if you answer honestly something bad will happen. Or people feeling so dark and down on life that they are thinking about doing something drastic or hurting people in a nihilistic flashy way of suicide like we often see in todays society. Or people that messed up mentally that they actually believe that is a good way to go out. You'll never get those people to come forward before hand the way we do things today which means we will never stop it before hand before it's too late.
exactly, it just locks them into a corner. to be honest, the government really needs to get their nosy ass out of these therapy sessions. what do they think was going to happen anyway? someone goes to help and mentions their thoughts, gets punished by the legal system, which fuels their rage/depression giving them even more motivation to do harm to others or themselves.
Agreed, I was waiting for a real "too afraid to ask" question
@@shabyheltay I'm too scared to even say my question in a comment section :(
@@reignrain4042 same here :,)
Animal assisted therapies, especially Equine Facilitated Psychotherapy, is a great therapeutic technique that allows for touch! There are also specific interventions within this technique that work with those who have experienced trauma. This is what I'm currently doing ny doctoral dissertation on!
hayenh that's beautiful! I want to be a clinical psychologist and I'm glad I came across this. Thanks again!
I have stubborn depression. The bright side of life doesn't last long anymore.. She was very helpful. Keeping my head up while fighting back tears
So that's why I have tears come out randomly.. Holding emotions in for 18 years...
:((( I'm sorry about that.
I know I can't do anything to help you and I'm no therapist but maybe try the following? Maybe try to keep a journal for your emotions it can even be online and you can use it as a diary. Try to even find a support group on insta and maybe all of you can spill together. I know this probably isn't helpful but even if you looked at this it will satisfy me. Indeed, with hardship comes ease. That's a statement I live by I have noticed even that these bad moments are just the beginning to something new and better. I hope you have an amazing day
She lowkey reminds me of colleen ballinger.
Theprat001 omg, yes, it thought I was the only one!
i was thinking thatttt
And I thought I was the only one xD
Omg same!!
I was gonna comment that!
"Especially when you haven't reaches out for days, or weeks, or months..."
Oh so that's why I cry for no reason
I've never talked about my depression.
Except once, with my friend, a year ago.
So yeah that makes sense
I almost never cry and yet I feel so insecure and upset. I feel scared to try new things and to move in from something. I want to see a therapist and all the videos I've watched I feel like the 'signs' a lot of the time relate to me. I feel so insecure and shy, embarrassed and upset so much of the time that I just want a sound proof room where I can just cry my eyes out. I hate when people see me cry which is why I hide it mostly but also because I don't want to... Be called names. I'm in High School and I've been called many names and now I think about it... It was mostly family. A couple tines I've questioned why I exsist. I even managed to make myself believe that it would be better if I DIDNT exsist and I still believe it now. I should go to bed soon is 20 to 12pm. Your video helped quite a bit. If you read to the end (if you even see this) I need advice... I don't know if I should ask my parents to get a therapist maybe or something hut I don't want them to know because I don't want them to worry about me. And cuz I hate when people try to make me feel better. It just makes me feel worse. Now I think about it though... Writing this down makes me feel so much better than before when I was almost in tears at how much I had on my mind. I guess the video making me want to comment helped as well. I'm going to go. Uh. Even writing this as a comment makes me kinda embarrassed and shy. Anyway, Bye!
Edit : WOAH I THINK I WROTE TO MUCH! DAMN! Sorry 😂
I remember when I was about 12 and I asked if I could see a different therapist I remember her getting upset and even offended. I was being nice about it I felt so guilty and then just stop going to therapy 6 years later and I now have a therapist that’s cool af and super understanding.
I like that she realizes that emotions are a natural thing, feeling anxious, depressed, overwhelmed. I've always expected therapists to try and diagnose every basic emotion with a disorder.
Ive been literally crying out of nowhere, and i mean like full-on SOBS, waterfalls of tears, for no reason at all! Omg she explained it here
With the personality question that is a matter of opinion as there are multiple types of psychology. She clearly believes in behaviourism and social learning theory, that the world and our parents shape who we are as people. But there are also other theories such as cognitive, which suggests that our brain is like a computer, or perhaps biological, which tells us that anything wrong with us is down to our genes and physical state of being, e.g. hormones.
Oh dear. Cognitive psychology does not support the idea that all mental processes occur in an experiential void. At this point in time, pretty much all theoretical and clinical psychology fields assume that mental processes are modulated or influenced by a combination of biology and experience.
Emmy Kilkenny You know it's a lot more complex than that right? Personality is shaped by both genetic and environmental factors, which is precisely what she is suggesting. No clinical psychologist truly believes that there is only one school of thought given that their training is very diverse in a lot of areas. They're experts for a reason. It's disappointing to see people apply psych 101 concepts they learned in undergrad to discuss such complex concepts.
is she 25 or 45? i cant tell
Probably 35.
probably 35
If you don't know stay between 35
Probably closer to 40 than 30.
33 or 37
I heard in a lot of people's experience with depression it makes them go farther away from their friends, but for me it brings me closer to them. When I am alone, is when I feel the most depressed, so I try to spend time with my friends to avoid that feeling. By having people that care about me, I suddenly feel more worthy. Though I still have those unwanted thoughts, I've been working my hardest to learn to live with that, and it has only been possible through the support of my friends.
I had a teacher last year who was really helpful in not only making the class actually understand math, but just being there for students when they needed it. She went above and beyond the roll of educating, and was a good friend. She was able to help with people that were going through abuse, drug issues, or any sort of mental health issue. She is probably one of the people I look up to most in life.
Psychology is something I've always loved. My moms a therapist, knowing that she's trying to save some lives makes me feel proud. I do come off as edgy but I just really like understanding human emotions, understanding life. That's why I wasn't really a fantasy reader because your stuck in other world besides real life.
1:16 "Join the club" Nice one, made me feel a lot better, haha
yeah in a way, it kind of feels like she's saying, "Well, everyone goes through what you go through, so it's not important. So just get over it already."
But overall I think she shows lots of signs of being a good therapist.
When ever i feel depressed or feeling about to cry or scream. My boyfriend hugged me and cuddle which released all those negative feelings. In my opinion, hugs can help people from feeling depressed. Im not expert haha. But this is how I feel.
You're soooo lucky if your mom/dad is a mental health professional ;-;
I know a friend, who is a psychologist.
She helps those who are hurt, when she’s the one that’s really hurting.
Helping others with their problems helps her get over her own, and so she loves her job.
"we've all been in those dark moments, it's just a state of mind". This is the the most perfect that can be given of what it sounds like when someone who has never experienced depression and has absolutely no understanding about what it might be like tries to explain it
Number one thing that helped me from stopping my anxiety was to stop looking online for answers on how to fix it or to compare my own experiences with others. Also try to be as active as possible to pump new information into your brain that drives out what you're anxious about.
It’s also against the law to talk about your patients and clients
She's so beautiful
I wish at least one of the 15+ psychologists that I’ve been to would have been as heartfelt and warm as you.
Something important she touched on, Your happiness depends on your mindset. No one said it was easy to change your mindset, its definitely not. And your mindset or 'personality' has developed from many different things so it does take time and work to understand yourself and find ways to get better. But no one is a lost cause. Everyone is deserving of happiness and love, and everyone is capable of being happy and feeling love.
I keep all of my emotions in a bottle so one day I felt like I was losing all my friends and I just felt like crying but I kept it inside so nobody would ask me or worry about me. I couldn't even bring myself to smile.
Her voice is so calm it’s like she was made to be a therapist.
I’m going to see a therapist because my mother believes I’m depressed and have low self esteem, I have been so scared because I don’t want to be a stereotypical teen girl who’s over thinking and being dramatic. Half of the time when I tell people how I feel -which is very rare - they tell me I’m fine and nothing is wrong but when I told my parents and thus broke down they told me it isn’t normal to feel the way I do about myself. My head is kind of all over the place now because I always thought everyone felt this way about themselves, part of me wished I never found out because now everything feels like I’m exposed and dirty. I hate this.
Andi Angel It is totally important to care about your feelins no matter what age you are.
1:30 THIS.
Gossip is one of the things that can almost instantaneously trigger me into a massive depressive episode. At one point I had made such incredible progress and was coming so far until I caught wind of horrible gossip about me in a circle of friends who I thought I could trust, and it set me back almost to square one - suicidal/self harm thoughts, worthlessness, the works. Not to mention extreme anxiety every time I was around my friends from that point forward.
Please don’t gossip. It’s far more damaging than most people realize. 💔
I feel like it’s so important to note that you don’t only need to seek help if it’s an anxiety disorder (or another mental health issue). Anyone and everyone can benefit from therapy!!
Such a lovely lady, and thanks for making these kinds of videos to have us have a look on professionals' views!
I'm scared to go.
I don't think I can afford it, how does that work. Do you need insurance?
I want to become a psychologist! It's just that....my parents don't support my decision....
Lina A. So what? Do what you want to do. You decide what your future holds. Not your parents😘
psychology isnt your only option you can also be a counsellor, which is a sepearte qualification. no doubt the lady in this video has both qualifications under her belt to do what she is doing
Silje Skj Aww thank you! Hopefully one day I'm going to achieve that!❤️❤️
Blu wolf Yeah, that sounds interesting! She portrayed it pretty well with her talk in this video.
Do what you want. It's your life, not your parents! If you truly want to do something and are interested in it, you will be good at it. There's no point doing something just because of other's expectations because if your heart isn't in it you will be miserable. I say this from experience!
I wish she was my therapist, she just seems so natural and nurturing. You're lucky if she's your therapist!
The way she explained personality was really cool, it helps me think about changing weak points in my own personality
I definitely would not tell my employer about depression!
I hope all therapists are like her so that those who need help have a high opportunity to flourish. She has such an amazing character, I adore her.
Damn she’s intelligent and pretty and seems so nice.. can she be my psychologist?
Amelia Joy I would love her as a friend tbh
you can tell she’s a therapist because of how soft & clearly spoken she is
If she was my therapist, I wouldn't be able to concentrate, she's so beautiful.
I always wanted to ask how psychiatrists coupe with everything they hear? It can really affect them mentally too, because the client shares their burden with the psychiatrist
Not just sacred, it's illegal to share confidential information about clients.
when she talked about suicide and she said "we all have those dark moments" I was like, bye, bad therapist
Agreed. While she's coming from a place of "see we got better you can too," to lots of people with depression, especially to people that have had it for years, their brain will receive it as dismissive considering the fact that they're now comparing themselves to other people with different privileges in life. I think more helpful advice to give would be to point out times where the depressed person has stood up to fight for themselves to prove that they have it within themselves to fight for a better future. That way it can reinstill their self-confidence by gradually introducing more therapy techniques to help them get better in coping with that fight for their future, as opposed to sparking feelings of helplessness by giving them any chance to compare themselves to people who've gotten through it, perhaps in less time than they've endured it.
I get that, but I think the "It's just a state of mind" thing was way worse.
"It's just a state of mind" actually broke my heart. I was so excited to watch this video and then it went all wrong. If the point was to make someone feel better and comforted by the fact that they're not the only one suffering from depression, she could have said "You're not alone", not "everyone feels sad sometimes [and you're just whining so get over it]"
"Everyone feels that way" is the main reason I thought feeling vaguely suicidal and hating myself constantly is normal.
I thought I was the only one. I didn't think a therapist could confuse the emotion of depression and the condition of depression. The condition of depression is not some mere "state of mind," and not everyone has it, not everyone makes it out alive.
When she was talking about crying and how when you hold up to much it just happens, I genuinely like she's such a good therapist like that actually got me.
Dr Sam is so lovely. Something about her voice and her body language really made me feel comfortable watching this video. I wish the therapists I've had could be as welcoming and warm as she is.
Great video and I hope this brings more awareness to those struggling with what could be mental illness.