9 FAUX PAS to AVOID making in FRANCE | French culture shocks
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- Опубликовано: 26 июн 2024
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Curious about the worst faux pas you can make as a foreigner in France? Here are the top 9 mistakes you can make in France that have to do with French culture, French social norms, and even the French language. Learn what not to do in France so you're prepared the next time you travel. What French culture shocks surprised you most?
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#frenchculture #francetravel #cultureshock
Her : here's what to not do in France !
Me, who's french : interesting
edit : *𝕱rench*
Same, I don't really know why I'm watching this
@@malibilliau I'm french aswell, idk either why I'm watching this video... It simply popped off of my recommendations
saaame
Same mdr
same
Nah, you can invite your guests for dinner at 6 pm no problem, as long as you have alcohol to stall till 8 pm.
It's called "Apéro" ! ;)
Le gros apéro des familles
Naaaa not for most people but part true... in fact you can do what ever you like as long as everyone agrees with it... like everywhere in the world.
hahaha c'est pas faux (not wrong ^^)
Apéééérooooooooo
If someone in france invite you at 6pm for a dinner, you know you will be taking the "apéro" and be drinking for 1-2 hours before dinner
Or he is looking for something
I'm french and i'm laughting so hard , that's so true haha ! And after dinner we drink a "digestif" ;)
@@Izzyflow28 Vous prendrez bien un petit quelque chose avant de partir, une framboise, une poire, une prune... et dire que certaines personnes étrangères penseront que l'on parle des fruits ^^ bon comme ils disaient : 'il n'y aurait pas de la pomme?' 'Y en a!' lol
Haha i'm french and this is so true !!
C'est direct ce que j'ai pensé 🤣 "18h ? C'est nikel pour l'apéro" par contre si tu proposes pas d'apéro, là c'est le summum de l'impolitesse 🤣
Ultimate faux pas: asking for ketchup with your foie gras ☠️
Omfg ! As a French, I had never thought about mixing foie gras and ketchup ! What an heresy !
THAT WOULD BE gastronomic sacrilege which should be punishable by immediate deportation 😲😨😨😲😲😲😨😨😲😨
@@MichaelTheophilus906 As another French, I have to agree about foie gras but pls don't generalize for the snails, a very few of us only eat them
@@MichaelTheophilus906 I think I ate snails once in my life, when I was a child. This is mainly a stereotype.
Regarding to foie gras, I think there are many different crual process in the agroindustry. The simple fact of eating meat implies cruelty since it requires an animal's death. So either you have to turn vegetarian or you accept a part of cruelty towards animals. It is a balance between your tastes and your ethics
@@MichaelTheophilus906 Do not judge what you haven't tried. At least in France it is real food not deep fried, chemical laden, overly sweet so called food you get in the US.
To avoid mistakes with "vous" and "tu", always use "vous" and if the person is okay with you using "tu", they'll tell you :)
Exept if you are 12 and the person is 40. She/He will say "tu", but as a younger person you shouldn't say "tu" in return
@@shimmentakezo1196 Except for Parent/Grandparent (Family in General)
Yes, the "tu" and "vous" thing should be much higher on the list (whereas the well-done steak thing really isn't that bad, I know several french people who like their steaks well-done it probably comes down to a specific person being offended, not "french people"). Because, ok, you're a foreigner, so people will probably forgive you anyway, but any effort towards that will most definitely be noticed and appreciated :)
It can be considered really rude, especially if it's at work, to say "tu" instead of "vous".
The best rule is : if you're not sure, use "vous", it basically cannot be offensive. Worst case scenario: the person explicitely tells you "Tu peux me dire "tu" " or "Tu peux me tutoyer" which means "you can tell me "tu" " (tutoyer is the dedicated verb for "saying "tu" ") in which case the question is now settled !
Have a nice day everyone!
Other thing : using « vous » when u talk to multiple people (« tu » is only used when u talk to a single personne)
This is a difficult question. I know a well-off family and in the generation older than me there is one sister that I tutoie and the other that I vouvoie. With the first sister I met some of her friends, had dinners, and tutoie them as well. One was a well-known artist and one time I was at a vernissage and started talking to him. I could see in the faces of some there that they wondered how a young insignificant creature such as me dared to do that.
Many years ago, I was introduced to a French guy through a mutual friend, and by force of habit, I went straight in for a big hug, and he froze up exactly as you described your father-in-law did. Anyway, I ended up marrying that guy a few years later, and we hug every day now!
awwww, love that!
I'm a dual national, French and US, + Swiss. I don't hug in any country-:)
Yeah it is normal, we never hug a friend to say hello. It's unusual situation and we dont know how to react because in fact the hug more loving situation than friends situation
@@jf5070 We can hug close friends if we both are touchy-feely, if we hadn't seen them for a while... But indeed, quite unusual ^^
😂😂😂👍👍👍
Why do I find this interesting ? I am literally French
On est 2
@@truosh4278 je pensais être seule
@@truosh4278 3 maintenant
4 je pense c'est normal 👀 ça nous intéresse de voir ce qui est jugé comme erreur pour quelqu'un de pas français
@@maguirbo On est ensemble les reufs. Mais oui c'est toujours drôle de voir ce que les autres cultures pensent de la notre
Only precision I could bring: If you choose well, your french friends will accept and enjoy all types of jokes. Even (especially) the darker ones
Darker the better, I do agree ^^
I agree but avoid these jokes on the first meeting. Show that your smart first and next time (or later in the day) you can start to joke about any topic you want else we'll think your arrogant.
True !
yea we do ;)
Yeah sure, but I think she meant not to do them at the first encounter lol
En fait chez nous à 18h c’est l’apéritif 😂😂
Je dirais plus 19 ou 19h30
Mdrrrr XD
@@silverwing2840 ah ça, ça dépend des régions XD Chez moi on commence limite un pré-appéro entre 17h30 et 18h 😂😂
@@sweetydraw5167 quelle région ? 😂
@@amelie8589 Nord Est 😂😂😅😅😅
@@sweetydraw5167 Nord Est, pas étonnant, on fait pareil chez moi.x)
When I was in France, I spoke very limited school girl French, but I found that people really appreciated the effort I made. I especially had fantastic interactions at restaurants by using the "politesse" tense of verbs. "Bonjour! Pourrions-nous manger ici?" was very well-received, and they treated us like royalty.
Yes, even a small effort goes a long way for tourists. And any additional French knowledge is a bonus!
@@OuiInFrance That's the case for every country I visit. To learn just basics words like Hello, please, thank you, Bye and counting to 10 completly change the point of view people can have on you. You are no more a tourist but a person that have take care to learn about the country, not just a dude that came to roast on a beach :)
They did not treated you like royalty and you don't want to be treated like royalty
@@pirovengeur640 Yes-
@@i.am.toxiccc When I met people, I would be polite, and very quickly I would ask if we could speak informally. :)
Damn I'm French and I feel called out XD I never realized that 'bonjour' was that big of a deal until she said it and I thought about it! So many times, a friend went to me and just started talking and I was like "Um. First of all, hello."
"bon déjà.. Bonjour ..."
When I was first learning French, I used to think it was a "faut pas" instead of "faux pas!" 😂
Haha, that actually makes perfect sense too :)
Excellent, in fact you were right in a way :)
Et oui, il ne faut pas faire de faux pas... :)
In fact it's almost the same : il ne faut pas faire de faux pas 😊
C'est mignon!
I m a passenger train engineer in France .
I was about to close the door when I saw a woman running and waving at me 100 meters away so l waited for her even if that would cause a small delay. She embarked , l closed the doors and l forgot about this.
At the last stop l got out of the train and the woman was waiting for me on the platform.
She looked happy and excited then she proceeded to jump in my arms to hug me while thanking me loudly in English.
I was so embarrassed l became speechless and l could feel the look of other passengers.
I understood she was prolly an American tourist , she meant to be polite and thankful and l totally get it but from the point of view of the shy guy l was it was a bit inappropriate.
I love the not being loud.
You can not go anywhere without hearing incredibly private information being yelled into a phone or to the person right next to them.
I totally agree with you.
@@MichaelTheophilus906 I live in Baltimore. All over.
In comparison to loudness in China?
Iam french, I can confirm what U say even here in France, in small cities. We are leaving in a world where there is nothing private -except for the elite people...of course-, in french we say the "grand deballage". U are sitting on the train, trying to sleep when suddenly a phone is ringing, a pretty lady starts her cumbersome conversation. Thus U forced to hear all her private life. Then impossible to sleep, impossible to ignore what she says. Impossible to tell her 'please madam Iam not interesting to know your private life'. U are condemned to undergone this 'chastisement'.
Else Iam totally agree with the video, Iam just surprised by the people who start their dinner at 6.00 pm. And at 11 pm, when U are hungry, will you dinner again?
@@siewheilou399
No idea. Have not been there.
It's not a comparison. Loud anywhere is annoying to be honest.
"French people are pretty forgiving when it comes to foreigners"
Well yes, we understand not everyone can be as enlightened as french people. :)
Don't joke on or mess up with the creator of the guillotine
Hum I'm French and I've seen people laughing which is worse lol.
@@Dimmary most of the time this happen between french and not with tourists (not French)
@Jodes Naughties Wrong, it's a French Surgeon called Antoine Louis that was the one who invented the Guillotine as we know it
@Jodes Naughties if the copy have more success than the original legally it's not a copy
From my experience in Paris you will be treated better in a shop if you say "Bonjour" with a smile when you enter.
Perhaps things have changed....but I noticed how you dress makes a difference as well....I purposely dressed in "tourist attire" (t shirt and jeans) and entered a shop....I addressed the shopkeeper with a pleasant "Bonjour" and was virtually ignored.....I entered the same shop later wearing the same jeans, but with a shirt and sport coat, and the shopkeeper virtually fell over me in their attention.....I know what you wear can make a difference anywhere, but it was especially palpable in Paris, I found.....
Exactement! So more polite to us, french speaking folks.
Scarlett Johansson said in an interview that she was surprised to do not see women in sportwear in the street in Paris. Sportwear is for sport not for shopping.
À Paris, on n'est jamais bien traité
@@malibilliau Le cliché ^^ bon pas complètement faux non plus mais bon...
Hi ! Thanks for that video ! As a French person I'd like to add that if you want to invite friends for dinner at 7pm (sooner than dinner time) it could be to enjoy the "apéritif", which can take quite a while too !
Too true
Even at 8 pm, don't you dare skip the apero ! But you have a high chance ending up eating your sausage a little burnt at 10-11 pm 😆 ah, les soirées apero/barbeuc qui n'en finissent plus !😄
As a French person, I just hate people talking loud and disturbing everyone around ... I would just give a dirty look (at fist) but if It is reaaaaallllyyy too much I would feel compelled to ask for silence (I feel like we don't really like to talk to people we don't know and it is even worst if it is to ask them to keep the volume down) ^^'
I live in Greece & they never shut up
As an American I too hate loud talking.
Some cultures talk loud (Italian, American,etc).
As an American my #1 pet peeve is loud talkers & people acting out loudly. In my travels I have noticed that Canadians, French and people in the UK are much quieter and reserved, which I like. There are many cultures that are loud though. Italians, and some middle easterners just for a start.
Many French living in the Dominican Republic, and we Dominicans are loud.
I totally agree with number one. To say Bonjour (I will even accept Hello from a non french speaking person) is for me an obligation. I saw a video from a couple from Canada (French speaking) that went two times in France, first time they complain about the waitress that they found rude. A french friend told them to say Bonjour. They did it during the second trip and say the people changed and they were really welcomed. The difference is that in some countries (or so I think) if you pay you can ask what you want the way you want. In France, the person that you pay is still a person. I already rebuked my children when they were young when they did not say Bonjour, s'il vous plait, merci et au revoir (Hello, please, thanks and good-bye). These few words, I always learn them in the langage of the country I travel and I can tell you that making this so tiny step towards people change a lot of things when you travel. Keep safe!
A not so rare interaction in France:
Tourist : "Excuse me, can..."
Frenchman, cutting them up : "Bonjour."
T : "... Can you..."
F, cutting them up again, rolling their eyes, visibly annoyed : "Bonjour!"
Saying hello thank you and smili g will always make a huge difference
French people doing that (usually in shops ) are to me very rude themselves.
@@emmanuellechardin7619 désolé de lire cela il y a des abrutis partout
I can at least managed those 4 words learned in high school French class. A second language was required when I was in school.
I’m French, and thank to covid we don’t have to make la bise anymore, before for exemple at a party I was always first because I didn’t want to make la bise to 30 people on row 😂😂
Yeah same... and I'm agoraphobic.
I miss the « bise » very much since Covid time, pity
La bise ce calvaire
I do the same Pierrick !
Same 😂 and the worst is when you don't know how many kisses you have to do
There is time and there is French time! I have lived here in Aquitaine for 19 years and if a meal is planned for 8pm it will NEVER start before 9pm. Eating out or with friends in an artform.
Bonjour. I spent a few years in Bordeaux in the 1980's. I agree with you but I'd say this is more of a habit in Southern France that in the North, where people tend to stick more to the said time. I'm not including the "quart d'heure de politesse" of course.
Just enough time for an... apéritif! Why hurry? Knowing where we're heading to anyway... Know what I mean?
@Duncan_Andrews= Might be that Aquitaine is close to Spain, where suppertime is late. Closer to the North, the polite time to arrive is between 8:30pm and 8:45pm - except for road or parking problems.
The rule of thumb is the appointed hour + about 1/2 hour. When I was young, I arrived for a dinner exactly at the appointed 8pm and the hostess greeted me in a bathrobe, still dripping from her bath!
How well I learned that!! a 3 hour dinner is not uncommon....
Dinner planned at 8pm start at 9.30 and finish at 23.30.. typically. At home or restaurant
As an American working in a customer service type job, I always greet my customers with hello, good morning etc. As a customer, I always greet the cashier, salesperson, etc. the same way. I think it’s so rude to just walk up with a question without a greeting first. America needs to catch on to this also!
For dinner the big difference is that most of my American but also Japanese acquaintances that eat at 6 tend to have activities after dinner. Like run errands buy stuff or even run or something. In France all of this is done between 6 and 8 and after dinner you just read a book or maybe watch a film but nothing requiring to be really active
Of course as the dinner is the eve activity 😂
Bonjour. As a Frenchman living in the US, I always watch your videos hoping to find some faux-pas from you but again, I get disappointed because there is nothing I could disagree with you. This is 100% accurate. Great job! If there is a couple of things I would add is when you have guests, it is common in the US for guests to go to the fridge to help themselves or grab the bottle of wine during dinner to fill their glass. After 21 years in the US, I still don’t do it at my in-laws. In France, the hosts take care of the guests. If they don’t, it’s a faux-pas but if you help yourself, it’s also a faux-pas.
Also, in a restaurant in France, it’s also a practice to split the bill when you are with guests but paying for exactly what you ordered was shocking when I saw it in the US. If you ask to pay for what you ordered instead of dividing by the number of people would be considered as cheap or not appreciating people’s company. Merci encore pour cette vidéo. À bientôt.
I'm American, yet never traveled to France....and each and every point you made, I concur.
My parents would never have dreamed of doing such things, whether they went to dinner at a restaurant or at home; and if any of their children even looked as if we would commit such a faux pax...we would have been in deep trouble😲😨
We were taught manners and my parents didn't tolerate anything less.
I'm glad I was raised this way
Hi Sebastien, so happy you enjoyed this and find it accurate. In my experience in the USA, helping yourself to something in the fridge is reserved I'd say for close relationships like a close friend's house or family you see often. If I went to a dinner party or something with other guests I didn't know or went to someone's house for the first time, I'd let the host get things from the fridge and definitely wouldn't help myself. It depends on the relationship. I'd be weirded out if I invited someone to my house for the first time (or was a work co worker) and they just helped themselves to something in the fridge. I can see how you'd feel uncomfortable doing this even after 21 years, for sure.
I've split the bill both ways in the US -- evenly when everyone has more or less the same thing (and even when the price of each meal varies a bit, like everyone but you got just a main course and you got a drink and a dessert too) and then also itemizing by what each person had. I think it depends on who you're with and how they all want to proceed. I've done it both ways. When everyone has more or less the same type of meal, I think it's tedious to split it down to the penny. Agreed.
Thanks for watching and sharing your input!
For your first point, I can totally agree and give the point of view from the other side. When I have (French) friends over for dinner in France, I have to actively remind myself to constantly keep offering them everything. I'm used to just putting all the food on the table and everyone serves themselves, or just leaving extra drinks in the kitchen and everyone goes and grabs one if they want. I've accidentally been totally rude before by serving myself before my guests because I waited a few minutes and they didn't take any, so I assumed they didn't want any. Yikes! 😬😳
On the other hand, I've literally never shared the bill evenly in France as you described, so I'm really surprised to hear you say that. We've always just paid individually for our own meals, or someone "invites" and pays for everything. I assumed that was the norm.
@@Rachel-rs7jn It depends on the person but I think if you put everything on the table and tell the people you invited they can help themselves, it would be fine.
@@noefillon1749 Merci Noé ! Now I just have to remember to do that! 😄
I was on a training at a police 911 centre outside Québec. At my last shift I went around to shake hands to say thank you. When I came to a very nice female officer, I reached in to give her la bise. When I saw her face redden, I realized you don't do that in English Canada, especially to a lady carrying a gun 😂🇨🇦🔫
I suggest you don't do that to a police officer in France, too
@@cmolodiets 😅😂👍
Québec is English Canada? My geography teacher must be from another Earth.
Québec is English Canada? My geography teacher must be from another Earth.
@@siewheilou399 Did I say Québec is English Canada? Nope. However, there are strong pockets of English. Demographically, the English left Québec in the 1970s for political reasons.
I had a student job at the Mairie de Saint-Pierre-et-Miquelon. One day at the beginning I was called upon the carpet to be reminded that it is mandatory to go around and shake hands with people at the beginning of the day, including the Mayor if his office door is open.
Don't just smile and say hello and go about my job. Major Faut-pas.
The most important one to remember is about hugs… it would get you so embarrassed
I see what you did there!
My son and I visited France last year and tired to learn some French words before we went and also some do’s and don’ts. We were treated well everywhere we went. In fact we did see some loud Americans in a restaurant walk in and start asking questions in English and actually become rude with the waiter who ended up walking away. We in the other hand had a great experience.
It is true anywhere you go. I am french and asked my kids to say good morning in italian during a trip in Italy and I can tell you that this few words changed a lot of things and people really enjoy it. After all, do not make to others what you do not want others do to you... who appreciate to be the target of a bully?
I saw that a few times, American being rude (waitress doesn't speak perfect English, which is unacceptable, they can't pay in dollar (yes I saw a guy yell and ask to see the boss because of that) etc... like they were in a colony or something... like we didn't had our own language and currency).
Once the guy almost hit the owner of a shop :o (big misunderstanding, the dog of the American wife was peeing on the products (food !) on a market (outside) but under a sign saying it was forbidden to let dogs to that here, for obvious hygienic reason. But because the owner's English was not that good (also that guy had a strong accent, even if I speak English I couldn't understand him), and because the wife didn't understand when he said in French to not let the dog do that here, he took the arm of the wife to show her the sign. After what the husband was chocked "don't touch my wife" and yelled a lot in English.... wanted to call the police, and was saying (for the part I understood) that they guy faked to not understand English to agress his wife... Big deal...of course the owner was pissed too, saying yeah he would like the police too, we tried to explain to the guy that we didn't understand most of what he was saying and... he didn't believe us ! Everything went better when an English person living there came and proposed herself as translator. I was really chocked of the manners of the guy, he didn't even try to understand what the owner was trying to explain, thinking "I don't have to make an effort, he has to speak better English" as I understood (of course he was also pissed because of his wife but we expected him to try to understand what we said even if our English was bad, instead of insulting us about it. (I also remember an American laughting at me, like "wow, you really should learn better English". Well.. and you, what other language do you speak ?)
WHAT??? You can ask your meat well done or even burnt if you like! 😂
We are not the cooking police 🤣🤣🤣
Same here - I'm French but I like my meat super well done and honestly I don't care if people judge me for it/disapprove of "ruining" my meat - in fact in restaurants to get the correct level of cooking, I usually say "hyper bien cuit, comme pour une Américaine" ! :D
Best way is to add an extra layer of jesting.
I'm French and my mother always ask her meat like : "start to cook it, forget it, and when you've brought everything else to the table, it should be ready"
@@chrisb9143 😂 my mother says the same. Are you my secret sibling? 😅
@@mgparis sorry chef, it's my meat, and I want it charred, if you have to be offended... well, it's your problem. I won't eat bleeding meat because of you :D
Same! I always ask my meat well done because it's the only way I can eat meat 🤣 And I've never had problems with waiters or cooks haha
Bonjour! Many situations also applies to Québec or many other French speaking countries. Je suis Québécois and let me tell you: being surrounded by over 300 million English speaking neighbours, it's always appreciated you at least try to say a few words in French when visiting us. Yes, we live in America, but 80 pourcent of us live, go to school, watch TV, work our everyday life in French. Most of us do speak English at different levels but we are mostly French speaking folks. Don't start a conversation with a basic : English please!! Say, Bonjour! Parlez-vous anglais? It's so more polite and you will see a smile in our face! Merci! Au revoir!
You are right, same in India, "English please" when you begin to speak French with other people who would like to speak French with you...
I'm French and established myself in North America 7 years ago. You're right regarding the lack of decent manners when addressing people. American people are extremely LOUD on a daily basis, it's terribly obnoxious and selfish. They also address strangers without considering greeting first, in a very rude manner. No "Hello" nor even a "Thank you" (example: strangers asking me where is a street, what time is it...). We're not animals, a lack of education that really annoys me living here. I never faced this type of behaviour back in Europe. So thank you for educating your American audience, your video is accurate.
I'm American and it annoys me. It seems people are so full of themselves that they think everyone might want to hear everything they have to say....
That selfish behavior is equally obnoxious to us educated Americans with manners. It is also the root of many of our social problems.
@@mattjamesreynolds goodness, yes!
Hello!
I'm French. Thank you very much for your comment!
I completely agree with your #1 faux pas. I would even go so far as to say that when you are requesting a service of someone whose job it is to provide you with a given service, you should say something along the lines of "Bonjour, excusez-moi de vous déranger, mais pouvez-vous ...." . As you say it's all about respect and not taking anyone for granted.
I love your vlog, keep up the good work! I really liked the ones on the bakeries.
Yes, that's a great line to use, Edward, and will start things off on the right foot. Thanks for wtaching!
That story of your FIL's reaction to your hug was hilarious! How is it that so often "gaffes" become fond memories?
Wonderful set of tips. My limited experience in France aligns with the lessons. Thirty years ago I took out a loan after college and spent 2 months backpacking in Europe. My French at the time was non-existent and my experiences in France were not awful but not pleasant either. Jump ahead 25 years, and I've invested in the Pimsler language series which I found a pretty decent way to pick up conversational French.
I took a bunch of Canadian exchange students over to France, dropped them off, then spent a week on my own. This time round, the experience was completely different. I had invested enough effort to communicate in train stations, restaurants etc, and even had a few longer conversations in a clothing store, a restaurant, and on the street (which led to an invite to join this person for tea to speak more). The difference was the people I was interacting with could sense that I had a bit of respect for their culture. That's all it took - a bit of respect and effort on my part.
My wife and I returned the following year for a week in Paris and we had precisely the same experience. There was nothing intimidating about the Parisians. Yes, there's more formality, but I liked that in a way. At one point, we went for a very long walk measured in hours and were some distance from central Paris. We walked into a florist shop, which probably had never seen a tourist, and spoke with the shop-keep. After a bit she recommended that we walk down this small street and check out a particular bar, which we did and very much enjoyed. All this was done, keep in mind, with limited French.
usually the train coaches are "no phone call" places, there's a sign for it. if you need to call or answer, you should go in the spaces between the room in the coach.
Thank you For explaining the difference between the two words bonjour and salut! So often in the United States we just get too casual even to the point when we pass by people we don’t even say hi but we say hey. A girlfriend of mine says we should not say hey we should say hi or hello because ‘hay’ (hey) is for horses!
Hello, as a Frenchman i must say that i wasn't aware of how formal we are, it's just so natural to behave like i do that i just realize it, so thank you for giving me this perspective of our culture.
By the way, the "Bonjour" is so important that there is a song "Bonjour" by Vald that parody how things can go wrong when you dont greet people. /!\ it's french rap and not family friendly if you see what i mean :)
Going to check out the song, thanks!
"Not family friendly" hahaha the least you can say! X) Advice for non-French ppl, don't speak like him in society lmao
These things don’t seem so formal to me; but I suppose it is by family. As an American, I felt awkward about all the things we are supposed to do-calling EVERYONE by first name (even ladies 50 years older down the street to whom you almost never speak.), so much hugging, asking “too much” “friendly” questions.
I am more accustomed now, but I also feel listless and tired and from so much “not-myself performance”. WHY must Americans be so offended by Ms./Mr.? “Don’t call me old/I’m not old.” 🥲
Yes, because for us, it is not formal, but normal...
I'm American and I think hugging people is WAY to personal. I do not hug people. The French check touching is also to close and personal. Just shake hands. Great video. Thank you for sharing.
I don't mind hugging family during holidays, but hugging everybody else??? Too familiar. Shaking hands is just fine. Now, with the Pandemic, I have a very valid reason for social distancing. I actually like that excuse so I don't feel awkward about offering my hands while backing off from a hug.
Well, not offering an actual handshake but just a visual handshake from a distance, or a hand wave.
Corona has had a few benefits. No more kissing No More hugging no more handshaking even which I like elbow bump is good enough for me also especially in Germany, people stay a little further away from you instead of crowding up on you. The benefits are small but we have to appreciate the ones we get.
As a French, I totally agree!!
I can completely relate coming from a Latin culture. We use very similar formalities including greeting everyone in an office or room you enter or leave. Social politeness and formality are the norm. It's good to know this type of formality is practiced in France. I'll try and do my best to be respectful should I ever have the opportunity to visit France.
Yes, in Spain one never goes into a dentist's or doctor's waiting room or even a lift without saying hello to everyone already there, and people also say hi if you come across them while walking in the countryside. In Britain it's not the norm. In France I've actually witnessed someone in a patisserie making a customer wait because they didn't say bonjour as they came in!
@@feanorian21maglor38 Things are confused on the sceptered isle: more ( young) people hug & others kiss on both cheeks . Sometimes people attempt both on me ( sadly an aunt whomlived in Spain knows I spent time in Spain & Peru & does both to me ?!).
In Sweden (where I live), it's also customary to hug your friends when you meet them, but only people you already know a bit and are close to. Not a new and perhaps a bit formal acquaintance. My mom is French. The first time she was introduced to my Swedish partner was a heck of an awkward thing, both for them and for me to watch ^^'
I think your list is perfect. After 32 years living and working in France (and becoming French) I still make some of these mistakes... 😱.
You are hopeless!!!
@@cellan67 Yes. Thanks for pointing it out again. You, of course, are practically perfect in every way. 🤣
Regarding these off-colour jokes : I know that I and most of my friends would get very offended right away if you say something along the lines of "you'd all be speaking german", and thus for the same reason that the French were offended by the Netflix show Emily in Paris : there is little that Frenchmen find more offensive than American supremacists and hero complexes
As an American i was offended by that show. It was cheesy and in poor taste. I believe the show could have been so much more than what was portrayed.
As a Belgian, the "joke " about speaking German enrage me because lot of people that live close to Germany border speak fluent German and sometimes is there mother tongue, like you say "hero complex"!
I always use vous. It's safe and I only have to learn one conjugation. LOL I like rare steak, so lucky me.
I was doing that for a very long time and I keep in doing. But after 10 years of being here sometimes "vous" makes people feel like I am looking done at them.
@@nikibineri3675 I think it depend if they told you to use "tu" or not. Because "vous" give an impression that you want to keep some distance with them
You can just put one rule : be polite
Bonjour, merci, au revoir
We learn these things at the age of 3...
The way to be polite depends of the country. That's the point of the video.
@@ParlonsAstronomie mais t'es débile ou t'es débile, partout dans le monde on dit bonjour merci au revoir c'est même pas une question de culture
@@guerriermelon581 Si tu te contente du bonjour, merci, au revoir au japon tu pourra quand même paraitre comme impoli, car leur règle de politesses ne sont pas les même.
Et si tu t'intéresse au témoignage des étatsuniens comme dans cette vidéo tu verra que chez eux aborder quelqu'un avec autre chose que bonjour ne semble pas être forcément impoli.
@@ParlonsAstronomie ah pardon pardon je savais pas que les japonais ne disaient ni merci ni bonjour ni au revoir, en fait si tu tapes ça sur google traduction y'a rien parce que ca existe pas chez eux
@@guerriermelon581 Je vois que j'ai affaire à un roi de la mauvaise foi. Bien sûr qu'ils disent bonjour, merci, au-revoir. Mais ces mots ne te serons pas suffisants pour être poli là-bas.
Si tu ne fait pas le bon salut, ou que tu le fait mal, tu pourra paraitre impoli.
Si tu prend la carte que te tend ton associé avec une seule mains, tu pourra paraitre impoli, etc.
Excellent as always.
Great video, thanks. I agree with most of these. My own pet hates are the points you made about being loud and the one about speaking English. Keep up the good work!
You understand why we say bonjour very well Madame !
Always excellent information!
Thanks Diane, your videos are always so helpful and informative.
You are so welcome!
These guidelines have always applied to American society as well. People have become overly familiar, rude and apparently never taught manners.
Thank you for a great and explicit video. Keep up the great work and stay safe.
Restaurant worker here, ask for the meat cooking you want. We don't really like it when it's not saignant/medium rare, but you are paying for it. As a waiter I personally invite the guests, to choose wich cooking by the quality of the meat we are using today. Ask your waiter !
Love your videos, on point.
Bonjour. About "la bise" and hugging, please let me share my experience as a Frenchman who's been living in Belgium for 20 years (by the way, Diane, I'm originally from Angers) - that's pre-covid experience of course. If you don't like the cheek kiss, don't move to Belgium, or at least to the French-speaking part of it, they're even more into that than in France. Shortly after we'd moved to Belgium, a neighbor introduced me to a young guy in his early twenties as being his daughter's boy friend. Though he and I were total strangers, he just kiss-cheeked me - and that was absolutely normal. In the course of years I got used to that. About the hug... I've worked in an international French/Belgian-American environment for 38 years. I was therefore accustomed to occasional hugging from my American colleagues as a sign of friendship, but I could never help feeling a bit awkward each time. On the other hand, I got really at ease at calling almost everyone by his/her first name, and I sometimes have to remember the French manners about that - but the Belgian are a bit more relax about this rule. Jacques...
In Belgium men do La bise to each other, unlike in France ;) It's not really about being more relaxed, it's just that there is no gender difference :) As a belgian with a lot of french friends, it found it funny to see my male friends doing the "no homo hand shake" even though there are super close. In Belgium they're would do La bise :p
« Chez moi c’est 4 » Je l’entends tout le temps quel plaisir
For n°1, the 3 mandatory politeness "expressions" :
Bonjour ( hello)
S'il vous plait / S'il te plait ( please )
Merci ( thank you )
If you forget one of these, you WILL seem rude. For context it's even expected from French children pretty much as soon as they can speak in full sentences.
And for tu/vous , when in doubt go for "vous", if the other person doesn't think you need to be this formal they will tell or ask you to use "tu" ( "Tu peut me tutoyer" /"On peut se tutoyer ?")
Yes! Please do a tour of Beillevaire for us. Love your videos!
Stay tuned for more on Beillevaire in early May if all goes well....
I worked for their Tokyo branch
Great tips and not difficult !
For number 6: most french prefer their steak : Saignant, it's close to rare steak
Beaucoup de très bonnes remarques. Some points we French only notice when others tell us about.
About the tu/vous... One of the problems here is that, nowadays, some people (mostly teenagers in specific areas) use the "tu" towards people they don't know, as a form of disrespect BUT gets angry (if not violent) if you answer them with a "tu" as well.
Great video...
Annnnd you just got a new French subscriber !
👍🏻
Thank you for your videos. I am thinking about living in France for a year to research my French heritage within the next year. I minored in French in college, but it has been a long time and am starting to listen to videos and brush up on my French.
3:16 I'm French and I can tell you that a HUUGE number of people is still doing "la bise" despite the pandemic xd
True, we refuse submission lol
how many still safe ?
@@shimmentakezo1196 yes but the Virus refuses your opinion XD
@@haydentenno6773 Like the flu, the cancer, car accident...
@@shimmentakezo1196 so you drive at 200kph to refuse submission ?
"don't hug French people"
Me be like: 👁️👄👁️
Nor people from Belgium!
They do la bise. Kisses on the cheeks.
@@Dimmary how many times?
@@loladubois7483 in the South 4 times
But twice normally.
@@Dimmary??? But why 😭😭
I would love to see a tour of a Beillevaire facility.....I cant get enough of your vids on French food!
Fantastic video. Thank You! 🌺
The "calling by the first name" is so weird for me in the US. Everytime I see a video (real one or a tv show) where I see a customer call a cashier by his/her first name, I'm dying inside. I was working in a big shop for 4 years and my collegues and myself would hated with a severe passion when a foreigner would ask us for our first name xp One time my collegue go angry and said to the customer "dude I'm not your friend, you don't get to call me by my first name" and that was super embarassing for both the shop and the confused customer :p So yeah big french faux pas : NEVER call an employee by his/her first name even if he/she wear a visible name tag. (also in Belgium and Switzerland btw :p)
Tout à fait d'accord, we didn't raise pigs together 😀😀!
As a French person, I hate hugs, loud conversations in public, talking about money and people who don't say "bonjour". For the rest, I easily tolerate the "faux-pas" of visiting foreigners.
I am agree, specially for the Hugs that I consider to be an intrusion of my living space and "Bonjour" which marks the respect and not the presence in conquered ground
1st world "problems"...
Thank you, I'm french and it's interesting to see and understand how french culture is by people from other countries
We tend to call out those who don't start with "Bonjour!" We are like " Déjà, bonjour!! ( first of all hello!!) or using facial expression and accentuating on the Bonjour!
About n°8, sometimes at work you'll use “vous” with the person first name. So “Pierre, comment allez-vous ?”. You stay polite but make it just a little bit more casual. It depends on where you work of course ! Sometimes it's more formal sometimes it's less (I personally use all my coworkers and clients first name + “tu” or “vous” depending on the person and how often we work together) but young people tend to dislike using “vous” + “madame” / “monsieur” because it sounds a bit cold and uptight ^^
He is not staying polite. He is claiming his superior rank using an old and unused form of language. It's even worse if he expect you using «vous + last name» in return.
Oh geez, yeah hugging is literally pressing your body onto someone else. In most of Europe you better know the person quite well before you do that ! It can be taken as a bit of a childish over enthusiasm but definitely can lead to huge faux-pas ! ^^
You are spot on with these! Well done. Merci!
Many thanks!
C'est décidé, je montre cette vidéo à mes élèves avant qu'on parte en vacances en voyage en France. Et à mes collègues!
5:10 And you will still singing « God save the queen » if we weren’t French :D
lol touche'
noooo dont say it they will start to say "It'S fAkE nEwS" (also England would speak German if 10 000 FRENCH soldiers weren't defending against 100 000 germans at the Dunkerques evacuation, making HUGE losses in the german side, forcing them to delay the invasion of England, giving them enough time to prepare themselves, but well ... since British film-makers decided there were no French soldiers in Dunkerques i dont know what i should trust, we even impressed german generals and they congratulated us for our Courage and our fighting capabilities SO I LOOK AT YOU VERY INTENSELY CHRISTOPHER NOLAN XD)
For number one, it is also an issue between French people. Some do not mind not being told "bonjour" at first and so tend to forget it towards others...but some find it really offending when you don't say "bonjour" to them. I am shy and don't want to bother others so when I see someone who is busy with something or in conversation with someone else, I don't say "bonjour", just to not disturb them... and some find it very offending :(
Very helpful! Merci!
Great tips. Thank you.
Two years ago, on my first trip to Paris, I would always make it a point to start any conversation with “Bonjour”. If it was a very simple question I would attempt using some French which I saw they appreciated. And if I felt I had to use English, I always asked “Parlez-vous anglais?” I saw that the people appreciated my effort and never experienced any feeling that the French were rude or impatient. They truly appreciated that I tried to speak some French. After talking a bit they sometimes asked where I was from and seemed surprised when they found out I was American.
You should rather say "nou you speek engliche"
I'm surprised too but I'm Irish and you have an Irish name and perhaps some of the zieishhess stayed in your genes:D
I think all of these things are important in ANY country. I taught advanced science students, who we know will have to travel wherever, I'd tell them to ALWAYS learn a few phrases in the country's native language. And always be polite.
Excellent advice!
Yes! If someone speaks to me in a foreign language, it takes me time to switch to this langage. I think it is the same for everybody. So if a foreigner begins with "bonjour", I think : "this man is polite", then "he sounds to be foreign, so let's prepare to speak English, German, or something else..." then I prepare myself to hear some foreign phrase. Beginning by greetings in the country language shows respect. In Europe, everybody tries to greet people in the country language when they travel in a foreign country.
So very interesting!!
Great video and Lingoda sounds great, all things food and wine related are big for me!
*Me who lives in France*
"don't be too loud"
Me: talks so loudly with my friends that people across the globe can hear
"Don't act familiar with strangers"
Me: tries to make friends with random people from my swimming class
DGSI agent be like : would you like to follow us, we have few questions to ask you ...
In Southern France, it is really not a problem to speak loud, everyone is talking so loud that you could easily understand the private life of a whole village in a few minutes 😂
@@camilleimbert5484 yes I do live in southern France near aix
5:04 TRUE, never do it, especially war jokes
We have those little ceramic dessert cups here in the States. I was surprised they were using glass. That’s only reason I remember it. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us.
I found your channel just recently and I am enjoying watching all of your videos. I enjoyed this one and I was familiar with some but not all the faux pas. Thank you for sharing such great and interesting information on your channel. I just love watching you and enjoy your humor. I’m from Florida.
Welcome aboard! Thank you!
As a Southern girl, I too, absolutely hate it when someone who doesn't even know me or just on a business basis (such as a cashier) or a child calls me by my first name. And "religion and politics" -- don't even ask me to go there. I wish we weren't a hugging country -- it's just soooo awkward. I always feel that if I butcher someone's language, they may roll their eyes and just secretly hate it. Thanks for that tip.
I agree about the hugging, I don't like hugging many people just my close family. It's too personal.
Many years ago I spent a short time in Paris. When I was wandering around the Metro, I saw a young Japanese woman asking people, in French, if they spoke English. They must have assumed she was an American, and ignored her. I got her attention and found out what she needed. Since I was new to the metro my self, I walked her to the platform she needed to catch the train back to where she was staying. The look of relief on her face paid me back many times the effort.
Hi, why would assuming she's American result in the French ignoring her?
@@OuiInFrance i think if the situation took place in the Métro, it was because peoples in Paris (and especialy in the Parisian Métro) are just here to go to work or leaving work, they usually either are exhausted or dont want to waste their time, talking with peoples (or even both) it's not because of the nationality of the person, it's just because it's not the good moment
Love your Chanel! Very informative.
For a french asking about their incomme is a BIG no no. wealthy people think they are rich but with "Classe". It varies among the population, poor people are more open to talk about money, but for exemple the first minister Fillon talked about bis home as a " maison", but it's a castel...lot of people laugth about him, but it's the norm amoung vert rich or noble people to do so. If you say you castel is a castel in a discution with other rich people, you will be seen as a "parvenu" (a new rich, but with poor people habits.)
You forgot to mention for the dinner invitation, french people always arrive 15 minutes later than the actual time as it's considered polite.
Also depending on the region can depend on the number of bises, where I used to live it was four.
non en France arriver 15 min en retard n'est pas polie mais plutôt une mauvaise habitude, c'est hélas trop rependu et donc considéré comme normal
je vous souhaite une bonne journée
@@CaCo2236 après 16 ans en France j'ai d'habitude materenent. Tout mes amis a m'expliquer que c'est normal pour eu est c'est comme ça.
C'est les jeunes jusqu'à les personnes âgées.
Je me souviens au début ça me rendrait sangle 😜
@@wearemysticking je suis navrée de vous contredire, mais en tant que française de 35 ans, je peux vous assurer qu'arriver en retard n'est pas polie, la ponctualité n'est hélas plus dans les habitudes de beaucoup de gens
je vous souhaite une bonne journée
@@CaCo2236 je comprends tout à fait votre point de vue.
Mes amis c'est votre âge jusqu'à 70 ans et plus. Si j'ai deux amis français que arrive à l'heure, pour la reste ils sont toujours minimum 15 minutes de retard. Et il m'ont tous expliquer que c'est comme ça.
En tant que anglais j'avais pas d'habitude avec les retards et j'étais surpris et confus au début.
C'est juste mes expériences personnelles.
Je vous souhaite une très bonne weekend.
I can't agree with you about French people ALWAYS arrive 15 minutes later and it is considered polite. I'm French (sorry for my poor English). A lot of French people arrive 15 minutes later, okay(and I don't like it), but not All. And It's never polite. Only your friends said that.
Have a good weekend 😊
Don't walk around with a smile; the French will thank you are crazy!
Soooooooo true XD
I am french living in France and I smile a lot, even alone worst, I like to sing (not loudly) when I walk a d I walk a lot. You are right, most of the people don't smile and it's a real issue (from my perspective)
this is only true in Paris :) But Paris is not France
Tu mens fort
@@florentxx Hi, I'm french ^^
I think it's not "only true in Paris."
I guess it's due to the different regions and difference between city/rural spaces.
To explain what I think :
In the north, people are more : calm, serious, shy. ("german culture")
In the south, people are more : open, loud, etc. ("latin culture")
In the cities, people don't know their neighbours, only make friends in right places (you don't call people in the streets, you met people in class, at work, in a football club etc.)
If you say "bonjour" to someone you see in the streets, the person would almost feel like attacked (we call it "harcèlement de rue"), mostly girls will feel like that, due to unsafe and poor areas...
While in small villages, rural places, everyone is supposed to know each other, and if you don't say "bonjour" when you see someone, they would know you're a "stranger", or they will think you are not polite.
People from rural places often think people from the cities are closed-minded and cold while people from the cities would sometimes think people from rural places are loud, talkative and annoying.
I'm from a city, + an unsafe area. I don't like when people I don't know come to talk to me in the streets, because I know the risk of pickpockets or worse...
When I go to Paris and some tourist ask me a question, I'm usually scared ^^
Because I was raised not to talk to strangers ^^'
Perhaps I am cold ? In my opinion, I'm just cautious ^^
If i say all of this, it's because I'm not the only shy young women raised in cities, there's plenty of women or girls who act just like me.
I don't walk while smiling, until nobody's around.
Because when you look happy, you look innocent, and when you look innocent, you look easy to approach, and people come and ask you for money, cigarets or more and when you're alone, not strong, and shy, you don't want those situations to happen '-'
So you just walk looking at the ground (until you're with friends family etc. it's okay to be happy together ^^)
Sorry if my comment is sooooo long.
But I really wanted to explain one issue on France that might be the cause of "not saying bonjour or looking happy in the streets walking alone".
There are pickpockets in Paris, and in other cities. Please be careful.
Even in some rural places (My boyfriend live in an old and poor city, 5000 habitants (my city is around 40 000) and you don't show your money there either..... for safety.)
Many asian tourists, like Japanese tourists walk freely, smiling, and show their money without paying attention, these people are the main target in Paris, but not only in Paris.
Thank you for sharing this experience ! I finally see people talking about respecting the rules when going to a different place, even as a tourist. I should show this to my students :-p Merci beaucoup ! Trying to speak a little even if it is just a little or with a bad accent will always (almost always haha) make locals appreciate the effort.
Love your chill and relaxed vibe :)
You could have a tea shirt printed " i hugged a French man"
That would be a good one!
i'm French and i totaly agree with that idea, we should have a shop where if you show them a picture of you, hugging a French, they give you the Tshirt for free XD(if he looks embarassed on the picture, they should print it on the shirt too)
Loud Americans!! It’s getting to the point that dinner in America is too loud. Meals in France are more intimate. Love the lighting in this vid. Bisous.
Not all of us. I can not stand loud people.
Without us loud Americans, you'd be German
Chris Kaye what made you think I was not American? my Father landed at D-Day so you missed the point. It’s hard to have an intimate meal with your spouse in America because any four Americans in a group nearby will wreck the mood.
Another very interesting video. I would love to watch a tour of
bei evaire.
Speaking of
faux pas..... I spelled biellevaire incorrectly. 🙄
As a french I would so much like to meet some foreigners on trip and help them. Too bad i live in à small town. Don't forget that France is not only Paris.
Bonjour 👋🏻 Diane. I hugged a French female friend. She stiffened up with her rigid arms at her side. 🤭 It was then that this American learned “French people never hug friends.”
It's a cliché I am french and I hug many of my friends.😉
In fact not actually because of the Sars-cov2 pandemia 😂😂
Very very true, if you make an effort speaking some french people will appreciate you a lot.
I 😍your channel.
You're witty, funny and bring us sunshine on the other side of the world
You explain facts in ways everyone can understand.
I understand your beloved France will be under lock down again (😢😕).
Please stay safe and healthy.
Thank you for being here. I appreciate you🌺
That's sweet Valerie, thank you! A bunch of regions have new measures as of this Saturday, including Paris. Curfew will now be 7pm instead of 6. Can't wait until we can all get vaccinated and get back to our lives!
One thing you could mention is not to bring wine to a restaurant and expect to pay a corkage fee.
We were returning to the USA the next morning and I called a restaurant near the Orly airport and asked if I could bring my own bottle and pay a corkage fee. I wasn't going to drink it anyway, and perhaps there was a misunderstanding, but I thought they told me that I could.
Later, they politely scolded me, as it's apparently not allowed in French restaurants. In the USA it's perfectly acceptable.
Except . . . You're not IN the USA so, those rules don't apply. You carry guns in the US, and you cannot do that anywhere else.
Leave the guns and the bad manners at home when you travel. and do as the Romans did when in Rome.