Think about it ladies. If he's getting the BEST of you without treating you right, he's getting the best of you whilst breadcrumbing you and you're treating him as a very important person whilst he's giving you the bare minimum...Why would he change? You'll say to him he needs to treat you better but if he can treat you poorly and still get the best of what you have to offer then what incentive inspires him to do better. He's already getting your best. He can treat you like dirt, breadcrumb, ghost, manipulate, use you and give you his a$$ to kiss and still receive VIP treatment from you. As a former pickme, if I can change anyone can change. Choosing you first inspires change. Loss inspires change.
No seriously. U may not be aware at first but you are doing yourself a disservice every time u accept that. And your gut is speaking to you, listen to it & take your power back. It is only a matter of time if you know this just haven’t grasped it. Speaking from experience. My ex did this to me, but at first the love bombing was too REAL. Be strong ladies, there’s so much more for you, start with YOU. Tap back into reality!
High value women do not like it when men are mysterious & don't text back for days. We value men who are polite, caring and authentic. Mystery and being nonchalant attracts men because men like to chase. They like to hunt. It's their nature. That, however, is not a woman's nature. We cannot stand to chase or hunt. How many women do you know want to go hunting? Almost none. We put our heart into relationships, so it's difficult for us to believe we've been lied to and manipulated. We want to think the best of a man. Thank you for revealing the truth about how a lot of men really are. I'll be much more aware now.
I sympathize with you, but a lot of women do the same thing, so it goes both ways. It’s bad enough we are already in a pandemic of weak men that are not guided at a young age how to treat a woman or even given the slightest truth on what attracts them. I agree with the message of stop trying to fix other people or mold them into being who you want them to be. Women also say they want one thing then Chase the other and this video is a great example of that. Realistically women enjoy the chase and if a man is too easy or desperate and don’t fit a certain prerequisite, he’s automatically ruled out.
Many women just care waaaayyyy too much for men. The women don’t care/love themselves but hope a man’s love will fill up what is missing in their lives. It’s a vicious cycle going from one man to another searching for love. The love is already inside them they have to dig deep to find it.
@Chayla417 I got the t-shirt for that one, so I'll tell you. Every time that you think about calling him to see how he's doing because he's on your mind, remember how you felt when you left. Remember how many conversations you had telling him how you felt, and he didn't care enough to stop hurting you. Remember how lonely you felt in a relationship with him. Remember that every time you are thinking about the wonderful times, you are thinking about the delusion you created. He was never that dude. Come back to reality and think, I spent years like this. Do I really want to spend another year feeling like this.
These toxic men are fully aware of their behaviour towards you, I’ve heard them brag about it. I wish every woman would understand that he is not doing you a favour by dating you, make him work for you, you are worth it. Don’t chase, it’s disgusting!
Almost 6 mins in and I feel embarrassed for myself! Truth hurts but I needed to hear this and thank you for the tough love!!! Needed it badly. ☀️ Thank you for your content 🙏
Yes that’s tough love! I stayed 20 years believing it would get better. I walk out being grateful for the lessons because the most important lesson I got from my husband is to love myself.
Ace I went on a date and the man ignored me by using his phone and watching videos . So I mentioned hello I’m sitting next to you remember. He said yes I see you. Ace I grabbed my handbag and clicked my heels and sachet my sexy self away . He hollering where you going I said I talk to u later I kept going.🤣😂🤣
I hope you didn’t actually talk to him later and that was the end of that for life. Hope you blocked him and deleted his number once you got in the car. That man I bet 💯% watches manophere/red pill content and he wanted you to chase him because he sees women as less than. He knew exactly what he was doing. He sees himself as the prize and wanted to see if you were desperate enough to tolerate it by being the “nice girl” you went on one date with him and he was already acting like that can you imagine how he would treat you down the line if you got with hum. We need to teach men that when they act like children for whatever reason that we won’t tolerate it. We wont yell …scream cry … we won’t write then send out long text messages with a thesis intro body and conclusion telling the man how he’s hurting us (he knows already he just don’t care) we won’t do none of those things. We just walk away for good. We are not afraid to be single and wait until and IF we find someone who is consistent and values us like we deserve.
I went bowling with my boyfriend and the woman next to us had been flirting with my bf and had too much to drink. Her husband just ignored her. I finally bowled the last 3 frames that were all strikes. I am a lousy bowler and turned around and yelled “yay”. They were leaning into each other in deep convo. He never looked up. I kick myself for not packing my back and getting and Uber. I really do.
Ladies you deserve 5 course meals. Why are you settling for breadcrumbs? Go buy your 5 course meals for yourself. You're full,whole , blessed and complete all by yourself
@@JustMalcolm914 I am learning that men have hard times also. Men you are all females in your age range in your area are made for you. Parents raise children to be independent, so you get boss ladies, butch women. Men need to take more time getting to know if a female is a mental match before he invests time in a female. Men have to give females time to adjust to the gender roles they are supposed to want. The bedroom is about two people not one person. If you are not in love with her after at least 3 months in, men, move on.
Thank you little brother I just walked away from a toxic man like that he was a Dismissive avodent and they are known for that.I wish you would do a talk on attachment styles. But thanks to you I took my power back it was more like bird seeds that I was getting.
I literally went thru the same with an avoidant. he feed me bread crumbs and did the no contact thing for a month. Truly the most confusing and stressful relationship I've ever been on
The worse are the ones who call and text EVERYDAY. It boils down to how they treat you, because it’ll come out in some way. Men have to be careful too because karma will come! Also, it’s dangerous! Some of these women will hurt your azz. I speak to my 12 yo son now about treating young ladies with respect, teach these boys to STOP playing these games! Start there…
Wow… he’s so on point with everything he’s saying. Men will manipulate you until the well runs dry, smh. Matching Energy is so easy and intentional. Ppl put effort and prioritize whatever it is they want to.
I’ll be the first to say, this happened to me! I finally said this is it, detached and kept it that way! Not proud of it, simply acknowledging it. Thanks for this message, there are a lot of naive ladies that need to hear this. I wish I heard it beforehand. On to other news, I’m not into the lack of availability, it used to work when I was much younger. Grow up, if you’re interested, show it or move on for me.
Nobody wants somebody overly available. And a woman who is naive maybe will fall for the waiting around for him to text back thing, but trust me..she will come to resent you eventually and finally start looking for a more decent man who is more consistent. So that is just temporary.
Ace you’re right. I too was guilty of some of the things you spoke about…but not anymore. There comes a time in your life when you take a step back and see the relationship for what it really is… All I have to say is ladies , if the tables were turned would he tolerate breadcrumbs from you????? Food for thought, think about it.
Even the overly available ones who put the work in for months will f you over once they have your heart. I don’t pay attention to mysterious men, I switch off. The good, consistent, not in your league looks wise, stable and appears to have his ish together can still ghost you due to his own ego and insecurities.
My sons father is just like this!!! The average Woman wouldn’t know because he puts on a good front. It’s not until you’re invested in him, is when he will switch like a light switch! Soul crushing! Kept me stuck for YEARS!!! Then would appear to change over and over, but nothing ever really changed or was consistent. Did good for 3 months MAX and back to the same old patterns. Only learned how to lie, cheat and manipulate better. No real change though. It’s sickening because I know a couple Women who think he’s this prize and I’m the crazy baby mama who doesn’t appreciate a good man. If they only knew the real him. 🤦♀️
@@kellithomas9080 sorry you went through all that. They tell us to choose better, if only it were that simple. It’s so hard to know who to trust and invest your heart and time into. The others will learn for themselves don’t worry about them. Take care of you and your child…his loss. Wishing you all the best.
You seriously know these men to a t every word is these narcissistic sociopath men who will always only give the bare minimum and expect the world in return . This hit my soul thank you
Booooooyyyyy!!!! You betta talk about it!!!! I’m here for it. 🤷🏽♀️ I told that clown 🤡 exactly what you are saying. The boy couldn’t match my energy dismissed. I love every word that you’re saying any woman who click off this video gotta be delusional. These men are on it playing games. I give you the same energy you giving me.
We were together in our younger years. I was his 1st love . End up getting back together, man ol man. I don't know wtf he is, and we were together 6 months. I lost shit messing with him, we were into it, so freaking much, I finally said f that and broke up with him on Christmas day.... he doesn't have any friends, he is disrespectful to his mom and children. When the 5 to 6 months came in, his true colors showed, and he ended up putting him hands on me. I'm like, yeah, game over.... he started thinking he could control me, and because I did not play by his rules, he hit me, and I walked. I learned so much from this video that this ish will never happen again moving on ..... thanks, Ace, for the great understanding of all red flags to look for in a so called man.
Whew. This is my first time seeing your podcast and you didn’t have to smack me around like this Sir 😭🤧 You literally described this man to a T and I’m sitting here like wtf?!! Lol
I have 3 brothers and a man. I can tell yall one thing for sure. The only thing men seem to all understand is actions. The only language they all seem to speak is action. We can explain and talk to them all day long. However, if you can't or dont back up what you are saying with action they will never take you seriously. It's just the way it is. Let them play in your face one time. Say what you have to say or dont. Either way, back it up with actions and consequences. You lead me on and I leave you. You disrespect my presence, then you have my absence. Stand on what you say. It changed everything for me. Stay strong ladies. God will work everything out with you and for you, but you need to do your part too. Aligne your prayers with action and watch how God comes through for you. God bless.
I am 42 now accepting this😮💨 now I can pass this wisdom and experience of abstinence to my daughter and granddaughters🧘🏾♀️✨📿 thanks for sharing this sir
I really can appreciate the honesty of this content. I feel as a woman it allows me to take a good look at myself to recognize what areas in my life require self accountability and self improvement. However, what concerns me is the constant self reflection that we as women are told we must implement to become better and whole. But there is rarely any conversations for the men who treat us bad. Do they not have any accountability for mistreating women or is it, oh well that's just who they are? It seems a little one sided.
This!!! There are very few and between. Places for men to unlearn this behavior. And majority of them are based in religion that only teaches them they are “the head” and they have never been a leader. And then when women do stand up, hold her own, date and move on we are labeled too masculine.
No there’s not! Thats because the universe is making space for them to receive their Karma. In other words, if these men (or women) feel like they’re getting away with harming others with their actions (without accountability) they’ll naturally make space for bad people to reciprocate that same energy. Coming to the realization of their toxicity and ugly ways is their Karma. Also, it naturally protects your space and energy when you get a gut feeling to avoid them. You don’t have to do anything except fall back and let them dig their own hole. 🕳️
Loneliness? More like lack of self love, self control and self worth. Self esteem and self care are so much more than affirmations, spas and spiritual mantras. Been where you are at….
great point. going long periods without dating can attract the wrong men sometimes, but keep being a great mom and build your life by working on your GOd given purpose
You got me so strong out in these streets these men hate me 😂😂 when they see me with my next man they will know he is everything they aren’t. I am gentle and sweet with the cut off. I silence out the matrix of bs. Thank you God bless you I started with self love, added my empress confidence, and end with Ace law. Out her in peace❣️❣️❣️
Ace, I like the way you deliver this message, you speak passionately, keep it real and humorous. Thank you for using your platform to empower individuals 🙏
We were taught to protect and care for bullshit men. Taught to see the best in them, to nurture them, raise them up, give them our all. And these men know how good we are to them and they might breadcrumb us acknowledgement but then treat us like we are no good for them, that we drive them to be stressed and abusive to whatever extent. We are the reason they are so wrong but... they were wrong to begin with and we kept offering redemption at our own expense. It has GOT to stop. Man babies gotta decide what they want and we gotta know where we can be safe and not victimized by our kindness
Be a better selector it’s clear you are attracted to men with these traits, perhaps that’s all you ever knew, but anyone who’s watched this content today can’t make any excuses after, women do the same thing so people just need to be better in general. We need to take accountability and show the younger generations an example of what healthy love looks like.
Ace!! I listen to you all the time but today! Man, it totally hit different today. Feel like all the mess I’ve dealt with over the years was explained through root cause in this one video.
Thank you SO much!!! I needed to hear this! I already started setting boundaries but this is confirmation I’m doing the right thing. Doing the right thing isn’t always comfortable but it’s so important
STOP 😭 I cried laughing when you starting picking up bread crumbs and smackin’ on em. Your personality is infectious, natural storyteller. P.S. It’s at 6:46 🍞
Not anymore. I let them have it once. See if it change. Then go ghost! Actually I don’t even wait til he change anymore. If he does it once he don’t want you. If he wants you he will act like you act towards him. No matter how busy he is. I’ve seen high value men make the time that they really didn’t have for me.
I have to admit usually when men come on to speak to us women about these issues I find it hard to receive the message because it seem like it’s a lot of anger behind it but with your message it’s totally different because I can feel the love coming behind it. You seem to genuinely care for us. This is why I can listen to your message and actually receive what you’re putting down.❤
If you ain't consistent with what you say you want why should I give my energy and time to fill you in my life , it's full enough trying to keep my peace together thank you ACE
Both of my exes did this months into the relationship. I fell for the "I'm busy excuse." Turns out they were both talking to another woman. My love life is a wreck and nonexistent and I'm so close to giving up. I'm crushing on a guy who was actually taken and I'm doing anything I can to distract myself. I'm praying so desperately that God would take him out of my mind but it's not happening. Instead, I'm just getting even more angry at myself for being the way I am. I feel so left out as I see everyone around me getting married and starting a family. Even they can't understand why I'm still single.
29:00 It's either he's doing that or worse, villifying you by asking you if "all you want to do is hurt him/take advantage of him?" Or the "be honest with me, have you cheated while we were together at any point?" Now you're placed in a position to always have to prove yourself and work to earn his trust on things you've never done but indirectly being accused of. He's just 'asking' you if that's what you did for reassurance x1000 times over. Repetition is part of the manipulation because it's purpose is to wear you down emotionally and psychologically, it's sickening
My question is why are so many men damaged, emotionally unavailable, opportunist, users, abusers, deceitful, emotionally manipulative? Videos focus on fixing women (which is great) however we need more men to focus on men learning the art of self discipline and self reflection.
This! Like it’s great men are giving us the “game”, but they really need to start focusing on teaching their own (men) to be better people and deal with their emotional shit. It’s literally affecting everyone.
He is 55 and has done all those breadcrumbing ghosting etc they never had words for it when I was in my younger years s I’m learning so much so thank you 🙏. I will no what not to put up with the next one ! Yes I’m done with him now ! He’s done it to many times We were teenage sweetheart hearts and got back together after 37 years some men never grow up 😮 he will get a shock when he reaches out again 😊onwards and upwards ❤️✌️
Damn, this hits home. Going through the pain now and trying to heal. It's better to stay single forever Edit: you are funny. You had me laughing and crying all at once.
Right sis I want to believe their are some good men out there I haven't met any and from what I'm seeing the rest of our sisters are having a hard time Makes you scared to date.
Ace I personally believe how better to learn about a man's behavior than from a man . The thing I can say about me is that although some have tried the breadcrumb thing with me I HAVE NOT STUCK AROUND for a long time for them to keep doing it . If you are dating for purpose (leading to marriage breadcrumbs will not lead you there ) .
I had to learn this I always knew it but wasn’t applying it.Married thinking things would change, he would mature, all he needed was time. Well 18 years in, married 9 years later it’s the same dam thing and we not even married no more. Your definitely dropping same truth/ factzzzzzz. And now my mind frame is different. But I had to do the work within myself first because it was never him it was me. We like to place blame on the person who is hurting us or won’t grow for us, or change for us but you’re absolutely right it’s us/ Women.
@@sheliasmith2884 I’m learning that. Took me some time and I have to remind myself at times. These men are a trip, I’m not saying some women aren’t but the good women still get the hitty side of the stick.
Ace, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I needed to hear this tonight. I was sitting here for 2 days feeling like a damn fool for being with a man for years who just clowned me. I needed to wake the fuck up because he's the damn clown!
I'm am a 62 year old widow who knows what love from a healthy man looks and feels like. I also desire marriage again but the people in the world are so corrupt that if your discernment is low because you're too lazy to seek God, you will keep meeting the same demon embodied in different men/women. A man who approaches me has only one time (if he said he'd call) to miss calling me without following up in a timely manner explaining why, for me to dismiss him as a suitor. If he can't keep his word over something that simple, he's not going to keep it with things of importance. Younger women have set the bar so low when it comes to how much they are willing to tolerate that most men think they can get away with bad behavior from all women. Be willing to be happy alone. Cultivate your own life with joy then the right person has the space to step in and add to that joy. Avoid everything else.
Thank you Ace for doing what you do. This one is definitely in my top 3 of all of the ones that I've listened to! I think I might just watch it again...Like right now😁👏👏👏👏
What about 13 and a 7 year old! 😥 the signs were there. Now he’s on a quest to find his wife. He switches every few months, but no real change. God told him I was his wife in August 🤣 now he’s searching for “The one” but still doing porn, still having sex with his flings, still not being real 🤦♀️ going to church and in ministry classes, but still doing the same thing. What Wife?? 🤭🤣 please
40:26 He’s making time for me and taking me serious. If I genuinely like him I want to see that he’s making time for me. Once you hit a certain age and level of maturity, you don’t have time for games. If he’s genuinely busy that’s one thing, if he’s creating “mystery” just because, no one has time for that.
I gotta disagree about the ‘mystery man with the choppy communication’ tho. If he’s not consistent, my assumption is that he’s juggling women or not that interested 🤷🏽♀️ Genuine interest- in my humble opinion - could easily be shown thru daily communication without coming across as overly available or desperate. And I’m DEFINITELY not being intimate with mystery dude. If anything, it’s delayed until his interest is consistent over time. #thatsall 👸🏽
![NLE Choppa - Or What ft. 41 (Orchestra Mix) [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/biOFASEgSOM/mqdefault.jpg)
Think about it ladies. If he's getting the BEST of you without treating you right, he's getting the best of you whilst breadcrumbing you and you're treating him as a very important person whilst he's giving you the bare minimum...Why would he change? You'll say to him he needs to treat you better but if he can treat you poorly and still get the best of what you have to offer then what incentive inspires him to do better. He's already getting your best. He can treat you like dirt, breadcrumb, ghost, manipulate, use you and give you his a$$ to kiss and still receive VIP treatment from you. As a former pickme, if I can change anyone can change. Choosing you first inspires change. Loss inspires change.
Now thisssss….
Well said… drop the mic!
Thisssss!!!!
I'm not having no.baby by no ugly dude just because he can treat me better I want someone I'm attractive to and will treat me well
@@blessedchildofgod9112you sound just as toxic & self-centered.
Exactly 💯 Let's leave these type of boys behind!
Having very high standards protects you from falling for narcs.
Ohhh not necessarily
Sorry Ms. but no it don’t.
Yes......
@@LogicallySpeaking_Real high standards not fake ones I’ll lower my boundaries because I like you!
Actually, narc's look for people with high standards so they can break them
Breadcrumbing works...temporarily. then the anxiety outweighs your dignity and you lose so much energy, you simply give up.
No seriously. U may not be aware at first but you are doing yourself a disservice every time u accept that. And your gut is speaking to you, listen to it & take your power back. It is only a matter of time if you know this just haven’t grasped it. Speaking from experience. My ex did this to me, but at first the love bombing was too REAL.
Be strong ladies, there’s so much more for you, start with YOU. Tap back into reality!
So true
You described what I have been struggling to put into words, thank you ❤
😳
Simply put-THANK YOU MESSAGE HEARD and UNDERSTOOD!
No contact works ever time, don’t let that man treat you like that, just block-delete goodbye 👋 move on. Peace of mind ✌🏾
No contact is so important to do and understand. 28 days of no contact!
They are going to give you exactly what you accept. You teach people how to treat you!
Right
💯 Facts! Toxic people know who to target. They can almost smell it on people.
Amen 🙏🏾
And they teach us how to love ourselves
High value women do not like it when men are mysterious & don't text back for days. We value men who are polite, caring and authentic. Mystery and being nonchalant attracts men because men like to chase. They like to hunt. It's their nature. That, however, is not a woman's nature. We cannot stand to chase or hunt. How many women do you know want to go hunting? Almost none. We put our heart into relationships, so it's difficult for us to believe we've been lied to and manipulated. We want to think the best of a man. Thank you for revealing the truth about how a lot of men really are. I'll be much more aware now.
thank you , it sounds toxic af
Lmaoo bullshit. Some of your fellow women still rather toxic men then decent ones
If that was the case then why are toxic men still attracting women If apparently all of you are so high value
Well stated
I sympathize with you, but a lot of women do the same thing, so it goes both ways. It’s bad enough we are already in a pandemic of weak men that are not guided at a young age how to treat a woman or even given the slightest truth on what attracts them. I agree with the message of stop trying to fix other people or mold them into being who you want them to be. Women also say they want one thing then Chase the other and this video is a great example of that. Realistically women enjoy the chase and if a man is too easy or desperate and don’t fit a certain prerequisite, he’s automatically ruled out.
Many women just care waaaayyyy too much for men. The women don’t care/love themselves but hope a man’s love will fill up what is missing in their lives. It’s a vicious cycle going from one man to another searching for love. The love is already inside them they have to dig deep to find it.
This is exactly me you spoke about
He’s giving the big brother we all need 🫶🏽
“You been in a down season ever since you met him”. Damn I felt that.
When did he say that?
And you can't even ask him for help since you want to prove that you not there for the money
Yes....me too
@@aselyne5631what !?! Wait a minute do u have sexual relations with this man cuz if so then don't!
Just left a relationship 2 weeks ago after being bread crumbed for 5 years… that boy been showed me who he was! Good shit Ace 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Felt this one.
Girl me too well I’m three months in after two years 🤦🏾♀️. He showed me everyday, how did I ignore it? I’m not that dumb 😢
How do you even… get back to you, after such a long pattern and time with someone else.
Asking for myself sis.
@Chayla417 I got the t-shirt for that one, so I'll tell you. Every time that you think about calling him to see how he's doing because he's on your mind, remember how you felt when you left. Remember how many conversations you had telling him how you felt, and he didn't care enough to stop hurting you. Remember how lonely you felt in a relationship with him. Remember that every time you are thinking about the wonderful times, you are thinking about the delusion you created. He was never that dude. Come back to reality and think, I spent years like this. Do I really want to spend another year feeling like this.
Well done girl. I'm proud of you.
These toxic men are fully aware of their behaviour towards you, I’ve heard them brag about it. I wish every woman would understand that he is not doing you a favour by dating you, make him work for you, you are worth it. Don’t chase, it’s disgusting!
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
All of this is the truth!! I’m done dating men that mysterious. I will take the man that responds and wants me around all the time!!
Almost 6 mins in and I feel embarrassed for myself! Truth hurts but I needed to hear this and thank you for the tough love!!! Needed it badly. ☀️ Thank you for your content 🙏
Factz
@kreestyle8986 right! literally 6 minutes in 🥴🤦🏽♀️
Truth hurts but we standing on business in our black airforces all 2024!
Yes that’s tough love! I stayed 20 years believing it would get better. I walk out being grateful for the lessons because the most important lesson I got from my husband is to love myself.
Same here...
Damn, this message felt like an ass whooping 😂😭 I needed to hear this today. Thank you 🙏🏼
Yes....Ace did that.😊..
❤
Ace I went on a date and the man ignored me by using his phone and watching videos . So I mentioned hello I’m sitting next to you remember. He said yes I see you. Ace I grabbed my handbag and clicked my heels and sachet my sexy self away . He hollering where you going I said I talk to u later I kept going.🤣😂🤣
I hope you didn’t actually talk to him later and that was the end of that for life. Hope you blocked him and deleted his number once you got in the car.
That man I bet 💯% watches manophere/red pill content and he wanted you to chase him because he sees women as less than. He knew exactly what he was doing. He sees himself as the prize and wanted to see if you were desperate enough to tolerate it by being the “nice girl” you went on one date with him and he was already acting like that can you imagine how he would treat you down the line if you got with hum. We need to teach men that when they act like children for whatever reason that we won’t tolerate it. We wont yell …scream cry … we won’t write then send out long text messages with a thesis intro body and conclusion telling the man how he’s hurting us (he knows already he just don’t care) we won’t do none of those things. We just walk away for good. We are not afraid to be single and wait until and IF we find someone who is consistent and values us like we deserve.
👏👏👏👏💪🏽
Equally Yoked , not Bob the Builder..❤
@@Bri-nc8yp I only said I’ll talk to you later to keep him hoping. lol . Yes I did block him and didn’t talk to him again.
I went bowling with my boyfriend and the woman next to us had been flirting with my bf and had too much to drink. Her husband just ignored her. I finally bowled the last 3 frames that were all strikes. I am a lousy bowler and turned around and yelled “yay”. They were leaning into each other in deep convo. He never looked up. I kick myself for not packing my back and getting and Uber. I really do.
Sometimes a woman needs to know when to let go
... and pay attention to red flags When we recognize red flags, we need to stop rationalizing them
Ladies you deserve 5 course meals. Why are you settling for breadcrumbs?
Go buy your 5 course meals for yourself. You're full,whole , blessed and complete all by yourself
It’s sad, really. I know 65 year old men that have done this all of their miserable lives.
Yep they do it because it works like a charm.
Pathetic
Yep I'm 59 and so was he Bread crumbs no more like birdseed I walked away 5 months ago gave that nut 2 years they will waste your time.
Tuh!!! Just got done with one 🥴
65😢
Listening to this makes me want to stay single for the rest of my life, just easier that way.
It really is easier and more peaceful.
We have too. All of these “gurus” are teaching us that men are not worth our time and body. It’s too many games to play and maneuver.
@Outof_thebleu so how you think we feel
@@JustMalcolm914 I am learning that men have hard times also.
Men you are all females in your age range in your area are made for you.
Parents raise children to be independent, so you get boss ladies, butch women.
Men need to take more time getting to know if a female is a mental match before he invests time in a female.
Men have to give females time to adjust to the gender roles they are supposed to want.
The bedroom is about two people not one person.
If you are not in love with her after at least 3 months in, men, move on.
@@BrandysParadise Basically nail on the head
Bob the builder! I can't breath 😂😂 you are spot on , just my life at the moment!
Unavailable men get left…QUICKLY!
Amen!
A word.
The men he describes are predators.🤯
Yes! 🎉
Love yourself and walk away. “Queen the f… up and walk the f…out!”
Thank you little brother I just walked away from a toxic man like that he was a Dismissive avodent and they are known for that.I wish you would do a talk on attachment styles. But thanks to you I took my power back it was more like bird seeds that I was getting.
I literally went thru the same with an avoidant. he feed me bread crumbs and did the no contact thing for a month. Truly the most confusing and stressful relationship I've ever been on
Dismissive and avoidant is accurate. Attachment style is key.
You are speaking the words that a lot of us should have been told from our fathers and brothers.
The worse are the ones who call and text EVERYDAY. It boils down to how they treat you, because it’ll come out in some way. Men have to be careful too because karma will come! Also, it’s dangerous! Some of these women will hurt your azz. I speak to my 12 yo son now about treating young ladies with respect, teach these boys to STOP playing these games! Start there…
It's comical that a woman has the nerve to tell a man to stop playing games.
Yes the ones who call and text you all day, everyday and ask to see you and then disappear
@@nunnallyai exactly! Like what was the point? If there’s no action, end the contact.
Didn’t want to cry during this message but I did!!! ❤ Tough Love
Aweweeeee I hope you are well and better.
I did as well. 💪🏿⚘️❤️
Wow… he’s so on point with everything he’s saying. Men will manipulate you until the well runs dry, smh. Matching Energy is so easy and intentional. Ppl put effort and prioritize whatever it is they want to.
If you’re accepting breadcrumbs and trying to change him, you’re codependent. Learn it.
Thank you Ace. Your realness is needed in these savage times. I listen just so I remember what not to do!
I’ll be the first to say, this happened to me! I finally said this is it, detached and kept it that way! Not proud of it, simply acknowledging it. Thanks for this message, there are a lot of naive ladies that need to hear this. I wish I heard it beforehand.
On to other news, I’m not into the lack of availability, it used to work when I was much younger. Grow up, if you’re interested, show it or move on for me.
ACE ACE ACE … you killing’ em out here with da TRUTH
That is so damn sad that people have to be this guarded these days
Not 'Taking off your CROWN, to put on your KNEE-PADS'... 😂😂😂
Nobody wants somebody overly available. And a woman who is naive maybe will fall for the waiting around for him to text back thing, but trust me..she will come to resent you eventually and finally start looking for a more decent man who is more consistent. So that is just temporary.
You mean overly unavailable
@@Iaraa234Both. Both are bad.
Interesting.. about both can be bad. No matter how you slice it we all got to be careful dating.. there's a lot of fakeness out there.
Ace you’re right. I too was guilty of some of the things you spoke about…but not anymore. There comes a time in your life when you take a step back and see the relationship for what it really is… All I have to say is ladies , if the tables were turned would he tolerate breadcrumbs from you????? Food for thought, think about it.
i love how angry you get to make a point. I'm a new subscriber. thank you for your realness.
Harsh truth for me. I was so damn naive and unhealed. Thank you.
Even the overly available ones who put the work in for months will f you over once they have your heart. I don’t pay attention to mysterious men, I switch off. The good, consistent, not in your league looks wise, stable and appears to have his ish together can still ghost you due to his own ego and insecurities.
Real talk, u got to keep your head on a swivel
My sons father is just like this!!! The average Woman wouldn’t know because he puts on a good front. It’s not until you’re invested in him, is when he will switch like a light switch! Soul crushing! Kept me stuck for YEARS!!! Then would appear to change over and over, but nothing ever really changed or was consistent. Did good for 3 months MAX and back to the same old patterns. Only learned how to lie, cheat and manipulate better. No real change though. It’s sickening because I know a couple Women who think he’s this prize and I’m the crazy baby mama who doesn’t appreciate a good man. If they only knew the real him. 🤦♀️
@@kellithomas9080 sorry you went through all that. They tell us to choose better, if only it were that simple. It’s so hard to know who to trust and invest your heart and time into. The others will learn for themselves don’t worry about them. Take care of you and your child…his loss. Wishing you all the best.
@@kellithomas9080Been there & done that. We must take care of ourselves at all costs. Stay strong Sis! ❤ bc we’ve got this! 💯💯💯
Especially them ugly ones fr 😂
It’s True. Some women (including me) like the drama and the toxic passion. Up and down feelings, chasing, love bombing crap. Sick and I want it gone.
You seriously know these men to a t every word is these narcissistic sociopath men who will always only give the bare minimum and expect the world in return . This hit my soul thank you
Booooooyyyyy!!!! You betta talk about it!!!! I’m here for it. 🤷🏽♀️ I told that clown 🤡 exactly what you are saying. The boy couldn’t match my energy dismissed. I love every word that you’re saying any woman who click off this video gotta be delusional. These men are on it playing games. I give you the same energy you giving me.
A guy tried to “breadcrumb” me. Long story short I played the game accordingly
Same. Now he begging for forgiveness #Bye #MyWorth🏆
Me to!! 🎉🎉🎉 shoutout to us
FACTS! Now he mad cause he saw me with another dude. Naw baby Im a 5 star restaurant type of chick 😂😂😂 BYE BOY
We were together in our younger years. I was his 1st love . End up getting back together, man ol man. I don't know wtf he is, and we were together 6 months. I lost shit messing with him, we were into it, so freaking much, I finally said f that and broke up with him on Christmas day.... he doesn't have any friends, he is disrespectful to his mom and children. When the 5 to 6 months came in, his true colors showed, and he ended up putting him hands on me. I'm like, yeah, game over.... he started thinking he could control me, and because I did not play by his rules, he hit me, and I walked. I learned so much from this video that this ish will never happen again moving on ..... thanks, Ace, for the great understanding of all red flags to look for in a so called man.
Im sorry that a$$hole put his hands on u...I loathe woman beaters!
Whew. This is my first time seeing your podcast and you didn’t have to smack me around like this Sir 😭🤧 You literally described this man to a T and I’m sitting here like wtf?!! Lol
Toby took hostage of your show! 😂😂 He’s so adorable! Love your show, you speak BIG FACTS!!
Definitely a problem when they're overly available at thr beginning and then switch gears a month afterwards
I have 3 brothers and a man. I can tell yall one thing for sure. The only thing men seem to all understand is actions. The only language they all seem to speak is action. We can explain and talk to them all day long. However, if you can't or dont back up what you are saying with action they will never take you seriously. It's just the way it is. Let them play in your face one time. Say what you have to say or dont. Either way, back it up with actions and consequences. You lead me on and I leave you. You disrespect my presence, then you have my absence. Stand on what you say. It changed everything for me. Stay strong ladies. God will work everything out with you and for you, but you need to do your part too. Aligne your prayers with action and watch how God comes through for you. God bless.
AMEN YES YES ❤!!
I am 42 now accepting this😮💨 now I can pass this wisdom and experience of abstinence to my daughter and granddaughters🧘🏾♀️✨📿 thanks for sharing this sir
Look Ace.... we need your honesty. Thank you!
Thanks, Ace...You are so on point. Serial 3 months dater..😅
I'm so glad, I can walk away. I'm waiting on my King. Love you Ace.
I really can appreciate the honesty of this content. I feel as a woman it allows me to take a good look at myself to recognize what areas in my life require self accountability and self improvement. However, what concerns me is the constant self reflection that we as women are told we must implement to become better and whole. But there is rarely any conversations for the men who treat us bad. Do they not have any accountability for mistreating women or is it, oh well that's just who they are? It seems a little one sided.
This!!! There are very few and between. Places for men to unlearn this behavior. And majority of them are based in religion that only teaches them they are “the head” and they have never been a leader. And then when women do stand up, hold her own, date and move on we are labeled too masculine.
No there’s not! Thats because the universe is making space for them to receive their Karma. In other words, if these men (or women) feel like they’re getting away with harming others with their actions (without accountability) they’ll naturally make space for bad people to reciprocate that same energy. Coming to the realization of their toxicity and ugly ways is their Karma. Also, it naturally protects your space and energy when you get a gut feeling to avoid them. You don’t have to do anything except fall back and let them dig their own hole. 🕳️
This is a truth everyone needs to hear!
Thank you Ace 😊 sometimes my loneliness leads me to toxic men and im a single mom .
Loneliness? More like lack of self love, self control and self worth. Self esteem and self care are so much more than affirmations, spas and spiritual mantras.
Been where you are at….
@@privatename40both
great point. going long periods without dating can attract the wrong men sometimes, but keep being a great mom and build your life by working on your GOd given purpose
You got me so strong out in these streets these men hate me 😂😂 when they see me with my next man they will know he is everything they aren’t. I am gentle and sweet with the cut off. I silence out the matrix of bs. Thank you God bless you I started with self love, added my empress confidence, and end with Ace law. Out her in peace❣️❣️❣️
I'm omw
Loveeeeee this
I totally was yelling and shouting laughing while watching this LOL. Thanks I needed that laughhhhhh
Ace, I like the way you deliver this message, you speak passionately, keep it real and humorous. Thank you for using your platform to empower individuals 🙏
We were taught to protect and care for bullshit men. Taught to see the best in them, to nurture them, raise them up, give them our all. And these men know how good we are to them and they might breadcrumb us acknowledgement but then treat us like we are no good for them, that we drive them to be stressed and abusive to whatever extent. We are the reason they are so wrong but... they were wrong to begin with and we kept offering redemption at our own expense. It has GOT to stop. Man babies gotta decide what they want and we gotta know where we can be safe and not victimized by our kindness
Be a better selector it’s clear you are attracted to men with these traits, perhaps that’s all you ever knew, but anyone who’s watched this content today can’t make any excuses after, women do the same thing so people just need to be better in general. We need to take accountability and show the younger generations an example of what healthy love looks like.
@@tybenz2533 you know what Ty get in your own lane. It's therapy for me to tell my insight outloud and I will not stop sharing.
@@venuspsychicmasseuse never asked to stop sharing your “insight” we all have the right to offer our perspective whether you like it or not.
This was the comment for me.. it’s crazy!!!!
He preaching and I’m ready to grow so this don’t even hurt to hear!
Ace!! I listen to you all the time but today! Man, it totally hit different today. Feel like all the mess I’ve dealt with over the years was explained through root cause in this one video.
I really need to hear this! Ace keeping it 💯. ❤
Thank you SO much!!! I needed to hear this! I already started setting boundaries but this is confirmation I’m doing the right thing. Doing the right thing isn’t always comfortable but it’s so important
STOP 😭 I cried laughing when you starting picking up bread crumbs and smackin’ on em. Your personality is infectious, natural storyteller.
P.S. It’s at 6:46 🍞
Not anymore. I let them have it once. See if it change. Then go ghost! Actually I don’t even wait til he change anymore. If he does it once he don’t want you. If he wants you he will act like you act towards him. No matter how busy he is. I’ve seen high value men make the time that they really didn’t have for me.
I have to admit usually when men come on to speak to us women about these issues I find it hard to receive the message because it seem like it’s a lot of anger behind it but with your message it’s totally different because I can feel the love coming behind it. You seem to genuinely care for us. This is why I can listen to your message and actually receive what you’re putting down.❤
Yep yep yep! A true Queen doesn’t negotiate or settle EVER. Don’t deal with court jesters, ladies. 👸🏿👑💋
If you ain't consistent with what you say you want why should I give my energy and time to fill you in my life , it's full enough trying to keep my peace together thank you ACE
I wanna say thank u .....I know it's hard to hear the truth and I needed to hear this message...THANK U SIR
Both of my exes did this months into the relationship. I fell for the "I'm busy excuse." Turns out they were both talking to another woman. My love life is a wreck and nonexistent and I'm so close to giving up. I'm crushing on a guy who was actually taken and I'm doing anything I can to distract myself. I'm praying so desperately that God would take him out of my mind but it's not happening. Instead, I'm just getting even more angry at myself for being the way I am. I feel so left out as I see everyone around me getting married and starting a family. Even they can't understand why I'm still single.
I know how u feel. Church is the only place u find a quality black man
Girl you describe my situation to a T
I thank you so much ! I am going through that same situation for 14 years! I will be listening to you to help me move on! Thank you
Amén…🙏🏼💗 This is the sermon I needed to hear. You are a the big brother I never had. Thank you.
Ladies-learn the game, let the dustballs bread crumb, fry fish, and whatever else….just do it far from me 💅🏾
29:00 It's either he's doing that or worse, villifying you by asking you if "all you want to do is hurt him/take advantage of him?" Or the "be honest with me, have you cheated while we were together at any point?" Now you're placed in a position to always have to prove yourself and work to earn his trust on things you've never done but indirectly being accused of. He's just 'asking' you if that's what you did for reassurance x1000 times over. Repetition is part of the manipulation because it's purpose is to wear you down emotionally and psychologically, it's sickening
If a man keeps asking a woman if she is cheating, I guarantee that he is the one cheating.
😊
Ace! I am laughing so hard at you right now! You ain’t nothing but the truth. I so needed to hear this today. Thank you!!!!
Ace You Is Telling The Truth Lol You Got Me Cracking Up Laugh Cause the Truth Shall Set Free!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
This summer is going to be REAL different. ❤
🤯 🤯🤯🤯 cereal dater, I never knew… thank you so much, you are helping me get through this horrible bread crumby situationship 🤦🏽♀️
Serial ,, like a serial killer or serial rapist
@@dantoinettetaylor1663😂😂😂
My question is why are so many men damaged, emotionally unavailable, opportunist, users, abusers, deceitful, emotionally manipulative? Videos focus on fixing women (which is great) however we need more men to focus on men learning the art of self discipline and self reflection.
This! Like it’s great men are giving us the “game”, but they really need to start focusing on teaching their own (men) to be better people and deal with their emotional shit. It’s literally affecting everyone.
@@Karynwashere LITERALLY!!
God I needed this..at this very moment in my life ❤ Thank you!!!
Don't use the Lord name in vain
He is 55 and has done all those breadcrumbing ghosting etc they never had words for it when I was in my younger years s I’m learning so much so thank you 🙏. I will no what not to put up with the next one ! Yes I’m done with him now ! He’s done it to many times We were teenage sweetheart hearts and got back together after 37 years some men never grow up 😮 he will get a shock when he reaches out again 😊onwards and upwards ❤️✌️
You rock! Thank you.
HANDS n KNEES
many many times
Damn, this hits home. Going through the pain now and trying to heal. It's better to stay single forever
Edit: you are funny. You had me laughing and crying all at once.
Right sis I want to believe their are some good men out there I haven't met any and from what I'm seeing the rest of our sisters are having a hard time
Makes you scared to date.
Ace I personally believe how better to learn about a man's behavior than from a man . The thing I can say about me is that although some have tried the breadcrumb thing with me I HAVE NOT STUCK AROUND for a long time for them to keep doing it . If you are dating for purpose (leading to marriage breadcrumbs will not lead you there ) .
You gotta step the game up! I don't do crumbs baby! I'm high maintenance! 🗣️💯
I had to learn this I always knew it but wasn’t applying it.Married thinking things would change, he would mature, all he needed was time. Well 18 years in, married 9 years later it’s the same dam thing and we not even married no more. Your definitely dropping same truth/ factzzzzzz. And now my mind frame is different. But I had to do the work within myself first because it was never him it was me. We like to place blame on the person who is hurting us or won’t grow for us, or change for us but you’re absolutely right it’s us/ Women.
Sis they never change I can write a book 📖
@@sheliasmith2884 I’m learning that. Took me some time and I have to remind myself at times. These men are a trip, I’m not saying some women aren’t but the good women still get the hitty side of the stick.
Thank you for poppin up on my RUclips. You really put this in prospective for me. Thank you thank you thank you
Ace, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I needed to hear this tonight. I was sitting here for 2 days feeling like a damn fool for being with a man for years who just clowned me. I needed to wake the fuck up because he's the damn clown!
🤗 it's gonna be ok, take yo life back...u hear me 👏🏽
I'm am a 62 year old widow who knows what love from a healthy man looks and feels like. I also desire marriage again but the people in the world are so corrupt that if your discernment is low because you're too lazy to seek God, you will keep meeting the same demon embodied in different men/women. A man who approaches me has only one time (if he said he'd call) to miss calling me without following up in a timely manner explaining why, for me to dismiss him as a suitor. If he can't keep his word over something that simple, he's not going to keep it with things of importance. Younger women have set the bar so low when it comes to how much they are willing to tolerate that most men think they can get away with bad behavior from all women. Be willing to be happy alone. Cultivate your own life with joy then the right person has the space to step in and add to that joy. Avoid everything else.
After suffering from this twice I will only entertain an available, consistent man. Because I don’t hate myself.
Too many broken men men and broken woman in this world. People taking those bread crumbs as “ love” because they lost love in themselves.
Thank you Ace for doing what you do. This one is definitely in my top 3 of all of the ones that I've listened to! I think I might just watch it again...Like right now😁👏👏👏👏
Nothing but truth💯💯 first time, and the last time lesson was learned💪🏿
What about five years! I have walked away finally!!! Absolutely I seen the signs
What about 13 and a 7 year old! 😥 the signs were there. Now he’s on a quest to find his wife. He switches every few months, but no real change. God told him I was his wife in August 🤣 now he’s searching for “The one” but still doing porn, still having sex with his flings, still not being real 🤦♀️ going to church and in ministry classes, but still doing the same thing. What Wife?? 🤭🤣 please
Thank you for this, because I needed a male perspective on this very subject. Moving fast in the first 2 to 3 months. Thank you ❤
I love this man 😂😂 he so funny and keeps it real
Mystery? Try that at a job! They will mysteriously be unemployed.
40:26 He’s making time for me and taking me serious. If I genuinely like him I want to see that he’s making time for me. Once you hit a certain age and level of maturity, you don’t have time for games. If he’s genuinely busy that’s one thing, if he’s creating “mystery” just because, no one has time for that.
Amennnnn!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽To this whole 👏🏽entire 👏🏽message! This PSA right here is the absolute gospel truth! From the book of Ace lol
💯🎯🎉💪🏽👑
I gotta disagree about the ‘mystery man with the choppy communication’ tho. If he’s not consistent, my assumption is that he’s juggling women or not that interested 🤷🏽♀️ Genuine interest- in my humble opinion - could easily be shown thru daily communication without coming across as overly available or desperate. And I’m DEFINITELY not being intimate with mystery dude. If anything, it’s delayed until his interest is consistent over time. #thatsall 👸🏽
Ace I'm all about listening you speaking facts 💯
Toby was just cheering you on back there cause you were speaking 💯 facts!!🤣🤣🤣💙💙 Thank you for this message! 🙏🏽