Punctuation is important.

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  • Опубликовано: 23 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 3 тыс.

  • @Matt_Rose
    @Matt_Rose  7 месяцев назад +2417

    Next Monday (15th April) we're doing "Type 'Matt Rose' and let autocorrect finish the sentence", and there is JUST enough time for me to include a couple of the responses to this very comment, so drop a reply for a chance to get featured skulllemojiii thanks bye.

    • @RoboRex2000
      @RoboRex2000 7 месяцев назад +71

      Ok

    • @lidioskoulidio
      @lidioskoulidio 7 месяцев назад +45

      Matt Rose I don't know what to say

    • @Harroldtf
      @Harroldtf 7 месяцев назад +41

      Matt rose is the one

    • @kiddieos
      @kiddieos 7 месяцев назад +43

      Matt Rose and we are all going on a cruise to visit with our friends house for a bit on our own business.

    • @ImTheMetalManiac
      @ImTheMetalManiac 7 месяцев назад +71

      Matt Rose has a lot of fat on the side of the tapestry.

  • @username5155
    @username5155 7 месяцев назад +8788

    I read the title as “Pronunciation is important” and honestly I’d love to see a video on pronunciation/capitalization because “Removing the polish with chemicals” is fine but “Removing the Polish with chemicals” is a war crime.

    • @Tzomthekliafafanboy
      @Tzomthekliafafanboy 7 месяцев назад +264

      Mate… no

    • @MyVanir
      @MyVanir 7 месяцев назад +599

      Ah, so when the Polish help remove others with chemicals, it's fine, but when they get removed with chemicals, all of a sudden it's "mate... no"?

    • @softie_preppy5625
      @softie_preppy5625 7 месяцев назад +64

      @@Tzomthekliafafanboy why

    • @oofertheanimator
      @oofertheanimator 7 месяцев назад +211

      as a polish person I feel mildly offended

    • @username5155
      @username5155 7 месяцев назад +594

      @@oofertheanimator​​⁠​​⁠You’re a polish person? What kinds of things do you polish?

  • @casualcommenter7152
    @casualcommenter7152 7 месяцев назад +5381

    In this case, “You’re the best Matt” and “You’re the best, Matt” are still equal

    • @animal_empyre
      @animal_empyre 7 месяцев назад +288

      He is a better Matt than most of the Matt's out there, Rose over Rife any day

    • @argumentator08
      @argumentator08 7 месяцев назад +49

      Matt Rose for #1 every day

    • @argumentator08
      @argumentator08 7 месяцев назад +37

      @@animal_empyre and walsh

    • @animal_empyre
      @animal_empyre 7 месяцев назад +29

      @@argumentator08 Him too, he's the worst Matt

    • @X.snow._.cat.X
      @X.snow._.cat.X 7 месяцев назад +37

      @@animal_empyreRose over Walsh any day

  • @table2.0
    @table2.0 7 месяцев назад +241

    The “wine bottle now” was an excellent joke

  • @piney2245
    @piney2245 7 месяцев назад +2927

    Quick! Hide, everybody!
    Quick! Hide every body!

    • @nonexistent-yt9em
      @nonexistent-yt9em 7 месяцев назад +236

      Quick! Hide, everybody!
      Quick! Hide everybody!
      Quick! Hide, every body!
      Quick! Hide every body!
      Quick hide everybody!
      Quick hide every body!
      Quick hide, everybody!
      Quick hide, every body!

    • @Keznen
      @Keznen 7 месяцев назад +222

      Even simply changing "everybody" to "every body" makes a whole lot of difference.
      "Quick! Hide everybody!" sounds like you're hiding people for some reason. Could be for a good reason or a terrible one, but they're implied to still be alive.
      "Quick! Hide every body!", on the other hand...

    • @Amy_the_Lizard
      @Amy_the_Lizard 7 месяцев назад +25

      Both can apply to the same situation in some cases

    • @stevelansfordsaveukraine8751
      @stevelansfordsaveukraine8751 7 месяцев назад +8

      ​@@Keznenthey farted too hard and died

    • @chef4evz
      @chef4evz 7 месяцев назад +11

      Hide everybody, quick!
      Hide every body , quick!

  • @jordanr.2120
    @jordanr.2120 7 месяцев назад +1949

    So many youtubers blur their feet. Not Matt. Matt gives the feet away for free because he's not a coward.

    • @SquiddyBonneBouche
      @SquiddyBonneBouche 7 месяцев назад +193

      Came for the feet. Stayed for the personality…
      Then came for the feet again.

    • @triventilatoro
      @triventilatoro 7 месяцев назад +137

      ​@@SquiddyBonneBouchei came to the feet

    • @christophersmall19
      @christophersmall19 7 месяцев назад +166

      How can Matt Rose see some shit like this, heart it and move on

    • @fig_flop
      @fig_flop 7 месяцев назад +103

      @@christophersmall19 because he's matt.

    • @SquiddyBonneBouche
      @SquiddyBonneBouche 7 месяцев назад +31

      @@triventilatoro Neither of us have came on the feet… not yet.

  • @Broloney_
    @Broloney_ 7 месяцев назад +579

    My mom briefly lived in England. At the beginning of the road there was a sign that read..."Dead slow children." Even today we joke about it.

    • @mrfrog0913
      @mrfrog0913 7 месяцев назад +18

      That's why you run across roads, even if you have scissors.

    • @travelwell6049
      @travelwell6049 5 месяцев назад +9

      What was the meaning of the sign?

    • @jimmydesouza4375
      @jimmydesouza4375 5 месяцев назад +45

      @@travelwell6049 "Dead Slow, Children". Drive slowly because there are children in the area and a risk of an accident with them. "Dead Slow" is a road marking/sign in Britain which is a "more extreme" version of the normal "Slow".

    • @0_dearghealach_083
      @0_dearghealach_083 4 месяца назад +10

      [Minecraft zombie noises]

    • @Broloney_
      @Broloney_ 4 месяца назад +11

      @@0_dearghealach_083 *baby zombie noises

  • @SmeddyTooBestChannel
    @SmeddyTooBestChannel 7 месяцев назад +1076

    3:13 not even that, the dude is looking to date two children who OWN A BUSINESS

    • @EatAnOctorok
      @EatAnOctorok 7 месяцев назад +55

      If they own a business, they must be pretty intelligent and wise. They need to be given some kind of license that allows them to act responsibly at their own discretion. ...That'll take decades of debate to legislate, though.

    • @adrianblake8876
      @adrianblake8876 7 месяцев назад +94

      Actually, he wants to date two businesses owned by children, if you read it correctly...

    • @cuckoobrain7999
      @cuckoobrain7999 7 месяцев назад +19

      @@EatAnOctorok 🤨

    • @cuckoobrain7999
      @cuckoobrain7999 7 месяцев назад +54

      @@EatAnOctorok "It's fine officer, they're a child but they own a business"?

    • @EatAnOctorok
      @EatAnOctorok 7 месяцев назад +21

      @@cuckoobrain7999 Child: "Here's my license of responsibility. I've been granted recognition of competence at the level of an adult."

  • @thebestalcachofaninguno3342
    @thebestalcachofaninguno3342 7 месяцев назад +1997

    I had to stop for a while to understand "I hosted a party this weekend where I gave my friends vegan child meat"
    Punctuation actually is important

    • @elisecode2212
      @elisecode2212 7 месяцев назад +91

      The way they wrote it is actually better

    • @urioriari34
      @urioriari34 7 месяцев назад +30

      Yet somehow your comment has none, lol.
      Yeah no that does seem weird

    • @mr.knightthedetective7435
      @mr.knightthedetective7435 7 месяцев назад +136

      FEED THE VEGANS THEIR CHILDREN

    • @maxanimator9547
      @maxanimator9547 7 месяцев назад +127

      I thought it was missing a comma. Took me some time to realise punctuation also included apostrophies.

    • @keroppib4ptista
      @keroppib4ptista 7 месяцев назад +22

      I still donut understand 🍩

  • @windows7RULES
    @windows7RULES 7 месяцев назад +159

    When I learnt about commas in school, my teacher had a whole thing on 'Commas save lives!', giving the example of 'We're going to eat grandma' and 'We're going to eat, grandma' with the comma saving grandma's life.

  • @chickenfarmer321
    @chickenfarmer321 7 месяцев назад +1579

    For the people that still for some reason fight against the Oxford comma, here are yet more reasons why it's necessary.

    • @sunnyquinn3888
      @sunnyquinn3888 7 месяцев назад +193

      I know uni life is exhausting, but I had no idea it was so bad for the students at Oxford that they were falling into commas!

    • @aromanticfranziskavonkarma
      @aromanticfranziskavonkarma 7 месяцев назад +92

      People fight against the Oxford comma???

    • @GabrielSemicolon
      @GabrielSemicolon 7 месяцев назад +18

      I'm ESL, and I will continue to fight against the Oxford comma because I do not vibe with it; I don't think it looks nice at all.

    • @SunnysinisterSD
      @SunnysinisterSD 7 месяцев назад +11

      No! But then Vampire Weekend would only have one mediocre song to be remembered by instead of two!

    • @chickenfarmer321
      @chickenfarmer321 7 месяцев назад +118

      @@GabrielSemicolon that... doesn't make any sense, the purpose of languages and proper grammar and punctuation is for clarity, not appearances.

  • @seekerlemm875
    @seekerlemm875 7 месяцев назад +1123

    2:16 "RIDING SINCE I WAS FIVE" made me *actually* choke on my drink. No exaggeration.

    • @EatAnOctorok
      @EatAnOctorok 7 месяцев назад +210

      That's not all that's being choked on.

    • @ChillyOutside
      @ChillyOutside 7 месяцев назад +154

      ​@@EatAnOctorok💀 they will never find your body

    • @jameskilgour387
      @jameskilgour387 7 месяцев назад +25

      Same!! Join the Matt Rose almost killed us gang. Rip Jeff though

    • @Xezlec
      @Xezlec 7 месяцев назад +25

      @@ChillyOutside Yeah not after that Octorok is done pummelling him

    • @D0MAM0LCH4T
      @D0MAM0LCH4T 7 месяцев назад

      i misread "drink" as "dick"

  • @blackqweenmars
    @blackqweenmars 7 месяцев назад +346

    4:29 I’m going to hell for laughing at this. It’s sad that they died but just imagining someone getting shot for not showing up to work is absolutely preposterous.

  • @MuchWhittering
    @MuchWhittering 7 месяцев назад +1810

    "Were #1" is Brexit in a nutshell.

    • @soupcangaming662
      @soupcangaming662 7 месяцев назад +122

      Or just post-British Empire.

    • @sumirunihon
      @sumirunihon 7 месяцев назад +64

      nah it's just post-british empire

    • @bobosaurus331
      @bobosaurus331 7 месяцев назад +43

      Although we weren’t #1 before Brexit either...

    • @ZigbertD
      @ZigbertD 7 месяцев назад +25

      Yeah, I'm not sure that one was unintentional...

    • @tzarg
      @tzarg 7 месяцев назад +19

      @@ZigbertD now that you mention it it does seem a little... extremely intended

  • @Arcane-Timebomb
    @Arcane-Timebomb 7 месяцев назад +875

    1:16 a sign written by crocodiles to get lunch.

    • @usertedi
      @usertedi 7 месяцев назад +23

      smart

    • @chachathepigeon
      @chachathepigeon 7 месяцев назад +35

      About that sign though, why would the crocodiles read a sign -
      Ooh WAIT! I just got what the sign meant 😂
      Apparently, there's even three ways to read this one 😂
      1) Crocodiles, do not swim here! (The way I read it 😂)
      2) Crocodiles do not swim here ... 😈🐊
      (The one that you were saying)
      and
      3) (what they PROBABLY actually meant) Crocodiles; do not swim here.

    • @secretmeister
      @secretmeister 7 месяцев назад +26

      @@chachathepigeon I did not think of the first one, that is hilarious. Hey crocs, would you mind just... not swimming here? thanks

    • @Arcane-Timebomb
      @Arcane-Timebomb 7 месяцев назад +4

      @@chachathepigeon first one is probably funnier.

    • @Aurora_Animates
      @Aurora_Animates 7 месяцев назад +1

      Hehe

  • @maddie-yt2qn
    @maddie-yt2qn 7 месяцев назад +160

    “last thing he needs is to be put in a comma” SENT ME 💀💀💀

  • @johnalexanderaylward
    @johnalexanderaylward 7 месяцев назад +172

    This is why "Eats, Shoots, and Leaves" is one of my favorite books

    • @asthejayflies
      @asthejayflies 7 месяцев назад +2

      what is this thing called honey?

    • @johnalexanderaylward
      @johnalexanderaylward 7 месяцев назад

      @@asthejayflies Eat here get gas

    • @Plethorality
      @Plethorality 6 месяцев назад +1

      Eats roots and leaves.
      Australians will get it.

    • @AndreiTupolev
      @AndreiTupolev 4 месяца назад

      Written by Liz Truss before her unfortunate venture into politics

    • @AndreiTupolev
      @AndreiTupolev 4 месяца назад

      Sorry, Lynn

  • @kiraoshiro9251
    @kiraoshiro9251 7 месяцев назад +55

    I like the crocodiles one can be taken three ways
    "crocodiles do not swim here" obv this means the water is crocless
    "crocodiles, do not swim here" can either be a warning to humans or it can be a command for crocodiles

    • @solveforx314
      @solveforx314 5 месяцев назад +6

      That one can be fully disambiguated with punctuation. If there's no punctuation, that means there's no crocodiles. If there's a comma, then the crocodiles are being told not to swim. If there's a semicolon, that means there's crocodiles, and you are being told not to swim.

  • @abadminecraftplayer
    @abadminecraftplayer 7 месяцев назад +1708

    A colon can completely change a sentence. Compare:
    I took my friend's sandwich.
    To
    I took my friend's colon.
    (Not my joke, but I can't find the original source)

    • @GRAYBOI897
      @GRAYBOI897 7 месяцев назад +38

      😂

    • @dawnh
      @dawnh 7 месяцев назад +73

      ok that got me

    • @z.m.stewart1996
      @z.m.stewart1996 7 месяцев назад +36

      well played

    • @aritheblob
      @aritheblob 7 месяцев назад +27

      ive seen it before and i cant get enough of it.

    • @charadreemur7990
      @charadreemur7990 7 месяцев назад +13

      Fool me once...

  • @Ey_SmoKrac
    @Ey_SmoKrac 7 месяцев назад +498

    watching this instead of the eclipse was THE BEST DECISION EVER

    • @BiwwiBob
      @BiwwiBob 7 месяцев назад +53

      Yeah, tho, for the, it isnt really a choice, since the eclipse can't be seen from my country...

    • @WeezerCatTM
      @WeezerCatTM 7 месяцев назад +30

      there’s an eclipse?!

    • @JustSomeoneHi
      @JustSomeoneHi 7 месяцев назад +18

      @@WeezerCatTM yea, though it's barely visible from anywhere

    • @Matt_Rose
      @Matt_Rose  7 месяцев назад +351

      Last solar eclipse was 2021, can't believe they're remaking it already. No creativity in The Milky Way rn smh.

    • @WeezerCatTM
      @WeezerCatTM 7 месяцев назад +13

      @@Matt_Rose wow.

  • @connordarvall8482
    @connordarvall8482 7 месяцев назад +45

    6:46, I was totally waiting to see an old man's head sticking out of a human-sized comma with the guy saying "I knew that wasn't gonna help."

  • @venomfan2020
    @venomfan2020 7 месяцев назад +1465

    Why punctuation is important:
    Let's Eat, Grandma!
    Let's Eat Grandma!

    • @Harroldtf
      @Harroldtf 7 месяцев назад +26

      Lmao i accidentally said the same sentence

    • @j_cannot_type
      @j_cannot_type 7 месяцев назад +76

      there was a poster of that in my primary schools english classroom lmaooo

    • @darkacadpresenceinblood
      @darkacadpresenceinblood 7 месяцев назад

      help your uncle Jack off a horse or help your uncle jack off a horse

    • @amethystmn6793
      @amethystmn6793 7 месяцев назад +5

      @@j_cannot_type same lol

    • @AnEffingPinkCatThatBreathes
      @AnEffingPinkCatThatBreathes 7 месяцев назад

      And capital letters:
      “Help my uncle Jack off a horse.”
      “Help my uncle jack of a horse.”

  • @paperstrawsYT
    @paperstrawsYT 7 месяцев назад +444

    ‼️⚠️ YOU’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME TO SAVE KUSHAAN ⚠️ ‼️

    • @j_cannot_type
      @j_cannot_type 7 месяцев назад +24

      my fav part of this vid fs 😭😭

    • @Engardian
      @Engardian 7 месяцев назад +40

      Feels like we’re some video game protagonist who got thrown into the middle of some kidnapping situation and have to rescue Kushaan

    • @sasvkeee._
      @sasvkeee._ 7 месяцев назад +10

      i didnt realise i was watching a horror movie jeez

    • @aynDRAWS
      @aynDRAWS 7 месяцев назад +15

      I'm now going to randomly send this to people whenever they're late to something, I love it so much

    • @fireflystudios123
      @fireflystudios123 5 месяцев назад +6

      What’s funnier is that the message was probably sent to someone named Kushaan. So he was probably confused he was running out of time to save himself

  • @Hikikomori_Mimikyu_2003
    @Hikikomori_Mimikyu_2003 7 месяцев назад +67

    The video: "Bishop agrees sex abuse rules"
    Me: "At least they're FINALLY coming out about it now." 😂

  • @The-creator-of-good-videos-15
    @The-creator-of-good-videos-15 7 месяцев назад +129

    Matt Rose: Talented gibberish speaker and an impressive narrator.

  • @Fandroid_INC-v1
    @Fandroid_INC-v1 7 месяцев назад +446

    “YOU CANT STOP ME BORIS.”

    • @KOcudz
      @KOcudz 7 месяцев назад +7

      YOU CAN’T

    • @animal_empyre
      @animal_empyre 7 месяцев назад +25

      But what if we wannae stop yer Boris?

    • @alicebthegachaweirdo8378
      @alicebthegachaweirdo8378 7 месяцев назад +7

      Do something about it…….Boris

    • @TheMenaceHimself2006
      @TheMenaceHimself2006 7 месяцев назад +13

      Bendy and the Ink Machine

    • @dk28100
      @dk28100 7 месяцев назад +12

      Even if we add a comma why does he want to do his dogs-

  • @SaltwaterTaffyz
    @SaltwaterTaffyz 7 месяцев назад +89

    Finally someone who acknowledges that hotdogs need life jackets, I can’t have a relaxing day of boating when my lunch keeps drowning.

    • @Blueberryyymuffin
      @Blueberryyymuffin 5 месяцев назад +4

      I thought the buns were the life jackets

    • @NAcHO-wx5vg
      @NAcHO-wx5vg 2 месяца назад +3

      @@Blueberryyymuffinthey don’t work well, they get soggy too easily.

  • @NullAmbition
    @NullAmbition 7 месяцев назад +397

    "Let's eat, kids," VS. "Let's eat Kids."

    • @RAJF24
      @RAJF24 7 месяцев назад +28

      I HAVE A SHIRT THAT SAYS THIS
      then a dinosaur and “punctuation saves lives”

    • @NullAmbition
      @NullAmbition 7 месяцев назад +3

      @@RAJF24 Where can I buy!?

    • @RAJF24
      @RAJF24 7 месяцев назад +8

      @@NullAmbition probs just on Amazon
      I don’t even remember where I got it from 💀

    • @vulpevulpevulpevulpevulpevulpe
      @vulpevulpevulpevulpevulpevulpe 7 месяцев назад +2

      if you insist!

    • @AXfanYeemo
      @AXfanYeemo 7 месяцев назад +3

      I prefer without the comma

  • @claramarie7923
    @claramarie7923 7 месяцев назад +64

    A lot of these (the ones that are headlines) are called “crash blossoms” after the line “Violinist linked to JAL crash blossoms.”

  • @zorapianist
    @zorapianist 2 месяца назад +17

    The children and babies made in USA reminds me of a sign on a bed i saw. "this bedding product is not recommended for use by infants and toddlers made in Vietnam"

  • @mecanum555
    @mecanum555 7 месяцев назад +293

    Mike's post is really funny because a comma wouldn't even have saved him from his blunder:
    Mike loves to:
    - Party,
    - Drink,
    - Shag,
    - Do his dogs,
    - Go out.
    You can't stop him, Boris!

    • @mrfrog0913
      @mrfrog0913 7 месяцев назад +1

      It was intentional

    • @toadynamite8141
      @toadynamite8141 7 месяцев назад

      This isn't in the video though

    • @mrfrog0913
      @mrfrog0913 7 месяцев назад +10

      @@toadynamite8141 it is

    • @homemovelha4173
      @homemovelha4173 7 месяцев назад

      ​@@mrfrog0913 yeah, especially because every other word has the commas separating them, to me it looks like mike is a zoophile and dosen't even try to hide it

    • @ebony721
      @ebony721 6 месяцев назад +5

      Wasn't it "shagging[,] my dogs..." ? That way it would've worked

  • @justhere4637
    @justhere4637 7 месяцев назад +109

    5:33 I like how you say this so suddenly.

  • @djsnowpdx
    @djsnowpdx 7 месяцев назад +5

    I spent three hours today learning that my parents are missing out on pension benefits due to lack of research, and that my own pension benefit as a public employee is not as grand as everyone thinks it is. This video is really helping me to unwind. Thank you, Matt!

  • @elliesteele2027
    @elliesteele2027 7 месяцев назад +107

    1:48 Whoever made this sign was _real_ sick of getting stuck in traffic.

  • @emberdragon3436
    @emberdragon3436 7 месяцев назад +128

    Also, too much punctuation can be a problem when the panda eats, shoots, and leaves.
    Anyway, gonna send this to my grammar-police mum

    • @MyVanir
      @MyVanir 7 месяцев назад +11

      The sequel to the loot and scoot, the shit and scoot.

  • @muffyxmind
    @muffyxmind 7 месяцев назад +419

    Fun Fact: When Snoop Dogg turns 60 years old, he will officially become 420 years old in dog years.

    • @booktionary--4276
      @booktionary--4276 7 месяцев назад +15

      Dog years, by the 7 to 1 calculation, are not real.

    • @Xaian1
      @Xaian1 7 месяцев назад +4

      Nice

    • @Vinterloft
      @Vinterloft 6 месяцев назад +21

      @@booktionary--4276 It is technically "not real" but only because we don't know the exact time perspective of dogs, especially since dogs are a very varied family of mammal. What we DO know is that time does move slower for smaller animals and faster for larger ones. A blue whale can live as long as 90 years but to the whale it might feel more like 30. A common housefly lives for a month which may well feel like 70 years to the fly. This is also how it can react to and avoid someone slapping it with a newspaper, from its perspective it takes like 10 minutes to arrive after the swing begins.

    • @olivercharles2930
      @olivercharles2930 6 месяцев назад

      @@booktionary--4276No shit.

    • @Alphacuremom55
      @Alphacuremom55 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@Vinterloft "Technically" No you furry it's literally not real, not technically.

  • @monoxxides
    @monoxxides 7 месяцев назад +93

    matt rose is the sole reason I can get thru mondays

  • @Anotherchild_lol
    @Anotherchild_lol 7 месяцев назад +107

    I agree with the thumbnail, regardless of punctuation

    • @Vs_stuff_and_things
      @Vs_stuff_and_things 7 месяцев назад +7

      same

    • @MicrowavedMedia
      @MicrowavedMedia 7 месяцев назад +6

      Me too

    • @Plethorality
      @Plethorality 6 месяцев назад +2

      I need the comma, thank you. I need to hear something positive about them.

    • @nokti...
      @nokti... 5 месяцев назад

      amen brother. all boobs are good boobs

    • @skully.5
      @skully.5 4 месяца назад +1

      Same 🙏

  • @mothmilker117
    @mothmilker117 7 месяцев назад +44

    that nah at 6:15 was so unnecessarily brutal.

  • @AnEffingPinkCatThatBreathes
    @AnEffingPinkCatThatBreathes 7 месяцев назад +79

    5:22 I feel like this is just a matter of poor wording.

    • @autonomouscollective2599
      @autonomouscollective2599 7 месяцев назад +16

      Honestly, I think someone else wrote in “yourself.” The handwriting is different.

    • @Aurora_Animates
      @Aurora_Animates 7 месяцев назад +10

      @@autonomouscollective2599no, I think it means
      Don’t touch it *BY* yourself

  • @KarateGirl999
    @KarateGirl999 7 месяцев назад +114

    0:13 Let's face it, putting a comma on "shagging" wouldn't have saved that sentence.

    • @six_buck_dlc
      @six_buck_dlc 2 месяца назад +3

      i didn’t know shagging was a term and thought it was related to like cleaning his dog

  • @SeaDog1667-1st
    @SeaDog1667-1st 5 месяцев назад +18

    5:08; Kathleen Bangs is better off changing her name because the descriptions on the news coverage are not likely to change. 😒

  • @internetlurker1850
    @internetlurker1850 7 месяцев назад +153

    2:43 I mean it works either way.

  • @gamingwlejla
    @gamingwlejla 7 месяцев назад +42

    I love this dudes videos they crack me up😭

    • @decmant
      @decmant 7 месяцев назад +1

      I live this dudes videos, they crack me up.

    • @sa1ry_
      @sa1ry_ 7 месяцев назад

      i lie this dudes videos٫ they crack me up.

  • @Chris_Cross
    @Chris_Cross 7 месяцев назад +79

    5:48 Can't help but notice the overall wording of this headline either. I bet if it was a male teacher with a 16 year old girl, it would be worded much more harshly.

  • @tinobiushecht-4205
    @tinobiushecht-4205 7 месяцев назад +44

    I should really stop watching Matt rose videos when not home alone. I have to pause so I don't start laughing like a madman in the evening!

  • @SR-zp4je
    @SR-zp4je 7 месяцев назад +21

    Was doing so well, then ‘put your feet up Barbara’ broke me and I spat tea all over my phone. This is hilarious, Matt, thank you

  • @otaking3582
    @otaking3582 7 месяцев назад +25

    0:15 Even if he did put a comma, he did start the tweet with _"doing_ the things he loves"

  • @jamasa007
    @jamasa007 7 месяцев назад +51

    3:24 Thank you Debbie. Please do.

  • @Verbosal
    @Verbosal 7 месяцев назад +48

    This has genuinely been my favorite episode so far and I haven't even even ended watching it. Thank you.
    "DO DRUGS & DRIVE" STILL CRACKS ME UP

  • @theranpofan
    @theranpofan 7 месяцев назад +19

    "I like cooking, my family, and my pets"
    "I like cooking my family and my pets"

  • @cellocat-sm8lx
    @cellocat-sm8lx 7 месяцев назад +11

    5:19 As someone who likes to serve hot breakfast I'm glad people like me are being remembered

  • @Effigy_the_furb
    @Effigy_the_furb 7 месяцев назад +67

    0:38
    That’s just the doing your mom joke but with extra steps

  • @melaskan7286
    @melaskan7286 7 месяцев назад +32

    2:52 just thought to myself, hey, what would that look like 😂

  • @Secretgeek2012
    @Secretgeek2012 7 месяцев назад +14

    Oh god, I'm crying here. I think this is the best one ever. 🤣🤣

  • @youtubusinfo
    @youtubusinfo 7 месяцев назад +142

    Dear English people, don't forget about punctuation. Commas are starting to feel very lonely for the last couple of years.

    • @vulpevulpevulpevulpevulpevulpe
      @vulpevulpevulpevulpevulpevulpe 7 месяцев назад +3

      hey uhh im brazilian not english does that mean i get a pass

    • @owenaspinall2046
      @owenaspinall2046 7 месяцев назад +16

      Missed opportunity to say "Dear English people don't forget to use punctuation"

    • @theflyingspaget
      @theflyingspaget 7 месяцев назад +27

      ​@@owenaspinall2046
      "Dear English, people don't forgett to use punctuation."
      "Dear, English people don't forget to use punctuation."

    • @gnoot50
      @gnoot50 7 месяцев назад

      technically arent english people british? im not british goodbye

  • @gferrol118
    @gferrol118 7 месяцев назад +50

    3:17 I'm not gay, but £10 is £10

    • @M0lDy_L3TTUV3
      @M0lDy_L3TTUV3 7 месяцев назад +10

      I'm not gay but Danny Gonzalez is drew Gooden

    • @a_plastic_bag
      @a_plastic_bag 7 месяцев назад +3

      @@M0lDy_L3TTUV3true but what?

    • @asackboyplush6508
      @asackboyplush6508 6 месяцев назад

      I'm bi and love money sign me up

  • @tobyandahalf
    @tobyandahalf 7 месяцев назад +20

    it's convenient that my daily breakdown in latin class is always around 11 ish so i can have a little matt rose to calm me down in the morning

  • @BigyetiTechnologies
    @BigyetiTechnologies 7 месяцев назад +81

    1:18 - that sounds like something a crocodile would say.

    • @Imaginen_un_nombre
      @Imaginen_un_nombre 7 месяцев назад +9

      Are you saying Matt is secretly a crocodile?

    • @ranjanbiswas3233
      @ranjanbiswas3233 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@Imaginen_un_nombre Aren't we all?

    • @Imaginen_un_nombre
      @Imaginen_un_nombre 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@ranjanbiswas3233 not secretly

    • @IllusiveTaco
      @IllusiveTaco 7 месяцев назад +1

      hmmmmmmmmm

    • @YankeeDood01
      @YankeeDood01 2 месяца назад +1

      Better…
      h e h e
      Better get an *INVESTIGATOR* ON THAT ASAP
      HAAAAAAAAAAAA

  • @prezdough3049
    @prezdough3049 7 месяцев назад +6

    Hey Matt! A nice idea for u. “Strange Obsessions”, I’ll start. When i was 7-8 yrs old, i had 2 obsessions, them being receipts and junk mail. I have absolute no idea why

    • @isitsweet9567
      @isitsweet9567 Месяц назад

      I had a strange obsession with knowing people's birthdays when I was 11-12.

  • @fishystuff3
    @fishystuff3 7 месяцев назад +13

    I’m dying laughing everything here.
    Thank you for delivering, Matt!

  • @EthanTheEngine7
    @EthanTheEngine7 7 месяцев назад +12

    'Were #1' as an Irish citizen I whole heartedly agree

    • @LovelyLara123
      @LovelyLara123 3 месяца назад

      I’m technically both (Both passports) so idk whether to agree or disagree 😂

  • @proto_117
    @proto_117 7 месяцев назад +28

    4:35
    where can I find more examples of these?

  • @GabroPlayz
    @GabroPlayz 7 месяцев назад +21

    1:25 "Yeah hi, I'm visiting the emergency department of this NHS hospital because I didn't eat any diarrhea lately, which has caused me to go absolutely nuts.

  • @szbnahl
    @szbnahl 7 месяцев назад +39

    Ah, my perfect Monday evening: come home from work, make a cup of tea, an hour in the park watching my dog chase squirrels and Matt Rose. ... I should probably teach my dog not to chase Matt Rose.

  • @pseudonymos_
    @pseudonymos_ 7 месяцев назад +9

    2:04 They used a period at the end of the sentence. They meant what they wrote.

  • @SonicStar737
    @SonicStar737 7 месяцев назад +7

    Hey matt first time i watched u was in 2021 and ive never gotten bored of ur content since, U RULE!!!

  • @Agvazela_Vega
    @Agvazela_Vega 7 месяцев назад +8

    1:12 as a brit, that’s not a mistake.
    As one Jay Forrman has said, “we got there first and now we’re the worst”

  • @MadamFoogie
    @MadamFoogie 7 месяцев назад +47

    4:22 Smacked me in the brain so hard, there was a three second delay before I cracked up laughing.
    I'll never look at a Volkswagen the same way again. Slug bug, indeed.

    • @LizordSword
      @LizordSword 7 месяцев назад

      my brain isnt braining what is it

    • @LizordSword
      @LizordSword 7 месяцев назад

      ah nvm

    • @MadamFoogie
      @MadamFoogie 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@LizordSword No worries, same.

    • @OminousBro
      @OminousBro 3 месяца назад

      @@LizordSwordwhat is it

    • @LizordSword
      @LizordSword 3 месяца назад

      @@OminousBro volkswa genitalia

  • @MartynAndStuff
    @MartynAndStuff 7 месяцев назад +50

    There's a maypole dancer
    Theresa May, pole dancer

    • @Secretgeek2012
      @Secretgeek2012 7 месяцев назад +1

      🤢

    • @Evie_SG
      @Evie_SG 7 месяцев назад

      Uhm what

    • @sentienttapioca5409
      @sentienttapioca5409 7 месяцев назад +1

      Holy crap

    • @westtxtapper
      @westtxtapper 7 месяцев назад +2

      That's a hideous thought.

    • @埊
      @埊 7 месяцев назад +2

      Theresa May, pole dancer
      Theresa May, Pole dancer

  • @justhere4637
    @justhere4637 7 месяцев назад +75

    6:49 This is so, unhinged.

  • @astergh0st
    @astergh0st 7 месяцев назад +2

    about two and a half years ago i commented on one of your videos that i was sick and your videos were making my sore throat worse because i couldn't stop laughing. today i have a similar problem, expect instead of being ill, i had some teeth pulled recently and all this laughing is hurting the extracion sites. thank you matt :)

  • @vadimplays4949
    @vadimplays4949 7 месяцев назад +14

    1:51 i didn't know that rattlesnakes use caution while walking around rocks

  • @thesquidsisters
    @thesquidsisters 7 месяцев назад +25

    Matt Rose makes monday's better 🗣️‼️‼️

  • @X-SPONGED
    @X-SPONGED 7 месяцев назад +43

    0:53
    "How to Cook Crack and Clean a Crab"
    *Ah yes. The only two things to do in Florida*

  • @csoxx
    @csoxx 7 месяцев назад +53

    4:47 why the actual fuck did i think he was MARKIPLIER

    • @terrotorotbart8319
      @terrotorotbart8319 7 месяцев назад +31

      "Hello everybody my name is Markiplier, kept hidden for almost two decades and forced to bear children"

    • @IllusiveTaco
      @IllusiveTaco 7 месяцев назад +6

      i swear he was about to say: Hello everybody my name is markiplier

    • @prageruwu69
      @prageruwu69 3 месяца назад +3

      they mpregged markiplier 😢

  • @Anonymous4045
    @Anonymous4045 7 месяцев назад +19

    I went to the movies with my sister, my girlfriend, and my mom.
    I went to the movies with my sister, my girlfriend and my mom.

    • @chachathepigeon
      @chachathepigeon 7 месяцев назад

      💀

    • @aynDRAWS
      @aynDRAWS 7 месяцев назад +2

      This is a bad example because it uses an oxford comma. I personally love the oxford comma. It can see how it might be read weird to someone unfamiliar with the comma placement, but I doubt the majority of people would have an issue.

    • @Anonymous4045
      @Anonymous4045 7 месяцев назад +4

      @@aynDRAWS The latter implies that my sister is both my girlfriend and my mom, so ig people from alabama or florida wouldn't think it's weird, yea.

    • @aynDRAWS
      @aynDRAWS 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@Anonymous4045 grammatically, it's still correct. Again, it's an oxford comma. In listings, oxford commas can be used before an 'and' or not- it is not a hard set grammatical rule. Personally I prefer the first sentence, because I love commas and probably use them too much in my own writing. However, I wouldn't tell someone they were incorrect for the way they punctuated the second.

    • @RedDotShark18
      @RedDotShark18 7 месяцев назад

      @@Anonymous4045 It still makes perfect sense

  • @Petrichor_Pyroclast
    @Petrichor_Pyroclast 7 месяцев назад

    I love the ramp up of volume and emotion in the "i wANT TO" line.

  • @Klockorino
    @Klockorino 7 месяцев назад +25

    3:02 Wait, wouldn’t “hand toes” be fingers?

  • @CreaturellaCOS
    @CreaturellaCOS 7 месяцев назад +54

    Ah thanks! Was just about to put on my skin suit! 1:33

    • @akahelpwttubers
      @akahelpwttubers 7 месяцев назад +3

      At least not fu...

    • @CreaturellaCOS
      @CreaturellaCOS 7 месяцев назад

      @@akahelpwttubers I have a fursuit asshead

    • @CreaturellaCOS
      @CreaturellaCOS 7 месяцев назад +12

      @@akahelpwttubers I have a fursuit, budster

    • @akahelpwttubers
      @akahelpwttubers 7 месяцев назад

      🙋 📓, 👤 🚫🔜 🎨 😖 👈 👤 💡

    • @remmurdydooM
      @remmurdydooM 7 месяцев назад +2

      ​@@CreaturellaCOS Bodysnatchers dont discriminate i see

  • @olivercharles2930
    @olivercharles2930 6 месяцев назад +31

    5:10 that is a very different kind of bully lmao

    • @AlanOfficialBoi
      @AlanOfficialBoi 2 месяца назад +3

      How do I get someone to bully me like that?

    • @RazelolGaming
      @RazelolGaming Месяц назад

      ​@@AlanOfficialBoiJesus is King, He died on the cross for you! Repent for your sins and you will be saved!

    • @awfulusername1465
      @awfulusername1465 17 дней назад

      ​@@RazelolGaming Nuh uh

  • @crescentrolls4
    @crescentrolls4 7 месяцев назад +20

    The pause at 5:36 before the “…why??” LMAO

  • @mrsquid_
    @mrsquid_ 7 месяцев назад +6

    "I'm Jonathan Charles, kept hidden for almost two decades and forced to bear children"
    best thing i've seen today

  • @debwilson1436
    @debwilson1436 7 месяцев назад

    I love these, my brain automatically puts ,. When I read, so I love hearing them out loud. SO MUCH FUNNIER..

  • @omgitsgreebeguys
    @omgitsgreebeguys 7 месяцев назад +76

    7:01 I lost it 😂

    • @DuoEditzYT
      @DuoEditzYT 6 месяцев назад +2

      Same man like 🐝

  • @ShizuruNakatsu
    @ShizuruNakatsu 7 месяцев назад +12

    "Crocodiles do not swim here"
    Oh thank God, my friend told me they did.
    CANNONBALL!!!

    • @Hortesdtion678
      @Hortesdtion678 7 месяцев назад

      It's supposed to be a sign of forbiddence

    • @ShizuruNakatsu
      @ShizuruNakatsu 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@Hortesdtion678 Unfortunately, most crocodiles can't read.

    • @Hortesdtion678
      @Hortesdtion678 6 месяцев назад

      OMGFDK

  • @DarthGTB
    @DarthGTB 7 месяцев назад +4

    Close to my work there is a sign that reads "DON'T SMOKE FLAMABLE LIQUIDS"

    • @DarthGTB
      @DarthGTB 7 месяцев назад +3

      To be fair, that sounds like a sound advice

  • @deathofallthingspotato9919
    @deathofallthingspotato9919 7 месяцев назад +7

    As a girl with long hair, I couldn't agree with Debbie more

  • @demo2823
    @demo2823 7 месяцев назад +13

    If "my dogs" are on the list of, "Things I like to do," I'm afraid no punctuation will save you.

  • @GippyHappy
    @GippyHappy 7 месяцев назад +5

    The stick figure drawing of Robbie and his grandpa took me out, I’d seen that post before but never with an artistic recreation.

  • @appleleptiker
    @appleleptiker 6 месяцев назад +25

    2:00 I'm not even gonna lie... That had me crying from laughter for a solid 30 minutes

    • @OminousBro
      @OminousBro 4 месяца назад +2

      Same

    • @v0lny886
      @v0lny886 4 месяца назад

      "Shit a hole in my yoga pants :("

    • @ronan-outoftime
      @ronan-outoftime 3 месяца назад +2

      half-life fan detected

  • @ArianesDrawingPH
    @ArianesDrawingPH 7 месяцев назад +25

    4:54 Gives me a heart attack.

  • @stucq
    @stucq 7 месяцев назад

    the "now a wine glass" joke was brilliant and I am using that the next chance I get i.e. whenever I am in the same absurdly specific scenario that I will likely never be in

  • @elhazthorn918
    @elhazthorn918 7 месяцев назад +6

    Moobs are indeed wonderful. Especially pecs.

  • @lilalino
    @lilalino 5 месяцев назад +11

    "This is BBC world news, i'm Jonathan Charles, kept hidden for almost 2 decades and forced to bear children" should not be that funny to me

  • @Gredddfe
    @Gredddfe 20 дней назад +1

    "All girls with long hair must be tied up"
    No amount of punctuation can save that one. You heard the lady!

  • @thegodofpez
    @thegodofpez 7 месяцев назад +30

    Love you, Mattypoo! ❤

  • @Antipaxos_Nadja123
    @Antipaxos_Nadja123 7 месяцев назад +24

    3:35 I don't think that was even a mistake, I think that's just British train companies being honest lol

  • @lilyflare2
    @lilyflare2 7 месяцев назад

    These videos always leave me in tears. 😂

  • @That_Cranky-Crane
    @That_Cranky-Crane 7 месяцев назад +20

    “Let’s eat Matt Rose.”
    “Let’s eat, Matt Rose.”
    Which is the correct one?

    • @usertedi
      @usertedi 7 месяцев назад +6

      both i suppose

    • @theenclave5332
      @theenclave5332 7 месяцев назад +13

      Depends on how hungry you are

    • @That_Cranky-Crane
      @That_Cranky-Crane 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@theenclave5332 ok that’s messed up but so funny 😂

    • @theflyingspaget
      @theflyingspaget 7 месяцев назад +3

      "Let's eat Matt, Rose."
      "Let us eat, Matt Rose."
      For some reason let's eat sounds like an offer while let us eat sounds like you're pleading with him for food

    • @埊
      @埊 7 месяцев назад

      ‘lets eat Matt Rose'
      'Lets eat Matt's Rose'