You hire a construction crew. James Hoffman appears alone with supermarket hobbyist-grade power tools. You never see him do anything other than wander around the site, make coffee, or talk about coffee. The neighbors are convinced that James' crew has at least half a dozen people, but when pressed, they can't recall their names or even general physical descriptions. Never the less, every time you come in to check the site, somehow, more work has been done. The project is finished on schedule. Every room smells of coffee.
Not that there wasn't strong signs beforehand, but I feel the original of this video is the tipping point of James moving into just making content purely for Hames to edit.
I think they're the same person. Look at James' sense of humor and tell me he wouldn't think it's hilarious to have this fake channel to do silly edits of his own videos, and never acknowledge that it exists.
Still never seem a James Hoffman video, but youtube recommends them to me now. I've been eagerly awaiting this one ever since I saw the thumbnail and wondered, "Is that a drill-battery powered coffee maker?" but didn't want to break my streak to check.
The subtitles at the start being in phonetic alphabet sent my linguistic-loving-heart to heaven. A+ I'm going back and watching all these vids with subtitles now.
One of my favourites so far. Sorry James, but its official I prefer these to the originals. Had to watch it twice just to get the subs, if you haven't watched it with subs you've missed at least half the fun.
This quickly has become my favorite channel and make me happy whenever there is a new video. Especially the subtitles to James' facial expressions are superb
You hire a construction crew. James Hoffman appears alone with supermarket hobbyist-grade power tools. You never see him do anything other than wander around the site, make coffee, or talk about coffee. The neighbors are convinced that James' crew has at least half a dozen people, but when pressed, they can't recall their names or even general physical descriptions.
Never the less, every time you come in to check the site, somehow, more work has been done. The project is finished on schedule. Every room smells of coffee.
I would hire this SCP in a heartbeat!
He also wears a different moustache every day.
Strong SCP vibes as correctly pointed out by someone before me. ☝️
This sounds like a great SCP.
He's like a British Ron Swanson.
It's extra funny when it's not even that different from the original video. It just has a more comedic timing with some cuts here and there.
Are you saying it was a helpful summary?
@@cosaqueexiste9647 oh no. Do we need to edit it again? Once more through the machine, it’s just too helpful!
I agree!
I recommend watching it with the subtitles on, it definitely adds to the experience
the "I've got friends" part absolutely killed me, thanks Hames Joffman
I feel as though the subtitles could have been used more effectively here
That was perhaps my most favorite Hames Joffman moment 😁
Not that there wasn't strong signs beforehand, but I feel the original of this video is the tipping point of James moving into just making content purely for Hames to edit.
My conspiracy theory is they're the same person...
He had already done videos for the Bripe, or the Barisieur, so I think this is true to form, and James just needs an occasional excuse to go big.
@@mmmhorsesteaks James claims that Hames contacted him on reddit before the first vid came out.
@@hoej on YT, he said he was fine with it.
I think they're the same person. Look at James' sense of humor and tell me he wouldn't think it's hilarious to have this fake channel to do silly edits of his own videos, and never acknowledge that it exists.
I love how the one time James actually has a moustache, you don't include it in the thumbnail. Wonderful attention to detail
Didn't even notice, masterful
FYI: There's this guy James Hoffmann how re-edits your videos to make them more useful. You may wanna do something against him
and seems able to get the videos out earlier as well. so he may be a hacker.
@@ThePlebicide he is hacking him to bring out the video early without editing such an genius move ;D
It's gross when people take beautiful content like this and ruin it by adding context and information.
Mr. Hoffman knows of this parody. He's ok with it. He has said so more than once on the official site.
@@lacewatkins8715 Whoosh
The "i have friends" edit was epic
Only thing better to wake up to than a fresh cup of coffee is a fresh Hames Joffman video with a fresh cup of coffee
Wait you drink coffee? I just brew it, look at it and make an exasperated noise and pour it out. Best start to a morning ever.
or with curd in your mustache.
Even better: a fresh cup of beef consomme
The captions make these unhelpful summaries so much more unhelpful. It’s amazing.
Bi pride
Rain sticks 🤣
Thank you, turns out I was missing out.
"Bob the builder told me I had curd in my mustache." I will never emotionally recover from this insult
"Curd In My Moustache, An Autobiography" by Hames Joffman.
For anyone watching without the subtitles, you are doing yourself a disservice!
Thank you for this, my life has been changed
Real MVP right here
guess I'll just have to re-watch it then....
darn
Thanks for the reminder, I keep forgetting.
Thabk you for your service o7
James: I don't want to jam this into the mug.
CC: (he jammed it into the mug)
Priceless!!! 🤣🤣🤣
I love how James has leaned into his Hames persona.
Those subtitles are genius. I genuinely have tears in my eyes from laughing, so thank you for brightening my day
I'm blinking the tears out of my eyes while reading comments!
Thanks for mentioning this they were hilarious
Subtitles made me feel like I was a higher intelligence being
Subtitles + 0.5 playback speed for added "tired-of-life-tipsy" effect.
Increasingly faster coffee drill grinding sounds like notation a composer would sneak in on the sheet music for the percussion section
Still never seem a James Hoffman video, but youtube recommends them to me now. I've been eagerly awaiting this one ever since I saw the thumbnail and wondered, "Is that a drill-battery powered coffee maker?" but didn't want to break my streak to check.
The subtitles at the start being in phonetic alphabet sent my linguistic-loving-heart to heaven. A+
I'm going back and watching all these vids with subtitles now.
Full Bella Poarch remix when!?
But seriously the "It's fine" (pragmatic, excusatory, explanatory) got me 😂 The editing is beautiful
If anybody still watches these videos without subtitles, YOU! ARE! MISSING! OUT!!!!! Subtitles ON for Hames!
You've outdone yourself, sir. Truly unhelpful. ☕
It's amazing how you even have the Hames Joffmann mustache in the entire video
These subtitles deserve more recognition!
Hames Joffman, you're a comedic genius. Thank you.
This is not coffee - it’s coffee.
Glad that’s cleared up. 😂
One of my favourites so far. Sorry James, but its official I prefer these to the originals.
Had to watch it twice just to get the subs, if you haven't watched it with subs you've missed at least half the fun.
Did anyone else exclaim "That's Numberwang!" when he was done doing the math...?
Now I'm just mad at myself that I didn't think of it 😂
This video needs a thumbnail with no mustache!
I second this
With so many sound effects in this episode, you can probably make a song out of them. The first Hames Joffmann hit
Rewatched with the captions on. 100% improved from something that was already 100% hilarious. 👍
The amount of times I've wanted to put coffee in my thermos but accidentally put in Coff, finally I feel noticed
Ive been waiting for this video ever since that imposter James Hoffman posted his version.
Your subtitles are so good.
(pragmatic) It's fine.
(excusatory) It's fine.
(explanatory) It's fine.
This quickly has become my favorite channel and make me happy whenever there is a new video.
Especially the subtitles to James' facial expressions are superb
First one I watched with the captions on. I've been missing out on so much.
Re-watching all of these at 0.75x or 0.5x speed is absolute comedy gold. Again. Cheers Hames!
"This is not Coffee, this is coffee" I felt that 😂
This guy is a great contractor, just finished building my house for a trillion $, walls are made of coffee pucks, totally worth it.
It's brilliant how little has changed for the Joff edit
Honestly waiting for this video to come out was like the run up to christmas
*"I have friends....."* ~ James Hoffman 2022
such a nice good morning chuckle with my coffee.
Hames, this is the best, ergo the most unhelpful video yet! Your powers of unhelpfulness are ever expanding with each new video! 👏🏻
You, good sir are going to be the cause of my death. But, at least I'll go with a smile on my face.
The zoom on the piece of hair. 🤝🏼
This got somewhat existential, I love it
How have i missed this till now.... Brilliant
I have never been more delighted in my entire life
Unfortunately I find this summary more helpful. Tells you everything you need to know. Love it
A wonderfully entertaining edit of a great RUclipsr. More power to you. Glad JH endorses this.
The subtitles of your videos make me laugh so hard.
Thank you Hames! Another 10/10. And to all of you internet traveler, I hope you have a great day!
Closed Captions are amazing.
I feel that Hames Joffmann videos are a good way to gently introduce my parents to the concept of shitposting
This is the best one yet. Superbly edited. Well done.
I love the subtitling you do, thanks hames
"the battery to liquid ratio" ... im always looking for that stat. Glad someone finally addressed it
I love these unhelpful nuggets way too much
I love the phonetic spellings for his \mōns\ in the subtitles :D
The Audio Descrioptions in Closed captions are a must.
"(That sounds like a Cassette tape)"
"(That doesn't)"
God damn, the amount of joy these videos bring me when they pop in my feed is unmeasurable
I love the closed captions!
"kettle cosplaying as a fire alarm" The Closed captions are fantastic
Found out about this channel because James mentioned it! Glad he finds it funny.
And honestly, that was one of his better vids. Funny edits here!
This is peak comedy for me. I am worried.
I was waiting for this
This channel is a master class for good editing!
The subtitles are just incredible
“because i have friends” wow okay i’m dead now i’m a ghost because you slayed me. thanks a lot.
That lunch box is serious nostalgia
“Now you’re gonna say, how am I boiling a kettle? … 🤷🏻♂️ …Look at this!” 😂
Lmao that Bella Poarch right there at the end. So goooood
I have friends--
[cut to high-five]
[smash-cut to intractable loneliness]
It's funny because it is relatable
I don't know why but this has to be the funniest shit I've seen this year
Well done sir!
"Cosplaying as a fire alarm" - am ded
belly laughed at that, thank you, Hames!
Always happy to see another Hames video. 😁
I also can't imagine being the one guy on a building site
Battery to liquid ratio is abysmal
"obvly this is not coffee, it's coffee" brilliant
that “I’ve got friends” part omg 😂
A masterpiece!
Looking forward to the summary of this vid
Subtitles are top tier, well done
"A long sip of acceptable volume" haha
(kettle cosplaying as fire alarm)
These are getting better and better 🤣
okay but the ending really got me
0:27 was amazing. Great use of the original
Love the subtitles
James is getting creative. I think he smash cut earlier bits in with the coffee and beef consomme.
I've had all sorts of things in my mustache.
THESE SUBTITLES! I'M DYING.
This time you didn't even need to draw the moustache on
The battery maths was beautiful.
I didn't realize this was not the official channel and I was like "wtf how is james hoffman doing a shitpost"
Watching this without subtitles is just not a good life decision
Wonder if we’re going to get a review of the 1zpresso products soon
In the backrooms, nothing beats a cup of caffeine with Hames Joffmann.
I put this on 50% playback speed and I can't stop laughing.