A Crap Guide to D&D [5th Edition] - Artificer

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  • Опубликовано: 4 дек 2024

Комментарии • 3,8 тыс.

  • @tactishovel2247
    @tactishovel2247 2 года назад +2957

    Fun fact: when I first tried out the Artificer, I noticed that for the Eldritch Cannon spell, the description says that you can put legs on it. The thing is, *It didn't mention a limit,* so I created the "Spider Tank," an 8-legged eldritch cannon, and I am currently in the works of trying to create the "Eldritch Centipede," an eldritch cannon with 20 legs.

    • @baylorreyna7646
      @baylorreyna7646 2 года назад

      Theres nothing truly terrifying unless your able to create life’s most disgusting creature. Then strap a gun on it.

    • @Nobody-xq8vj
      @Nobody-xq8vj 2 года назад +212

      "Brings out flamethrower"

    • @connormcconnell7805
      @connormcconnell7805 2 года назад +309

      @@Nobody-xq8vj you fool the spider *is* the flamethrower

    • @FreshmanGrimm
      @FreshmanGrimm 2 года назад +63

      Can it shoot legs tho???

    • @connormcconnell7805
      @connormcconnell7805 2 года назад +17

      @@FreshmanGrimm no

  • @thealchemistking4063
    @thealchemistking4063 4 года назад +3518

    Artificer: *”I’m going to invent a combustible lemon and burn your house down”*

    • @CrazyHand7894
      @CrazyHand7894 4 года назад +95

      I see someone's a fan of Portal 2.

    • @tuckermatis1572
      @tuckermatis1572 3 года назад +98

      It's like Mom always said: "When life gives you lemons, make some grenades." Or something like that.

    • @blaxidii7360
      @blaxidii7360 3 года назад +11

      Hahaha! Parry this you fucking casual!

    • @JamIsSquared
      @JamIsSquared 3 года назад +116

      When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your Damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

    • @drclockworks4280
      @drclockworks4280 3 года назад +49

      We had an artificer Who did exactly that since the DM kept throwing lemons at him ( it's a bit of an inside joke) and he used said combustible lemon to burn a Griffon to death and if that wasn't enough he started dancing with the bard on top of the burned corpse

  • @tuseroni6085
    @tuseroni6085 3 года назад +2768

    way i see it: wizards are to artificers what theoretical physicists are to engineers.
    had an engineer once demonstrate this to me as he was working on a product that levitates plastic balls with air, my thought was "calculate the terminal velocity of the balls and modulate the air output to match that speed" his method was "hook a fan to a potentiometer and dial it in til the ball floats"

    • @wrennybih
      @wrennybih 3 года назад +256

      i mean, both work i suppose

    • @gormauslander
      @gormauslander 2 года назад +189

      @@wrennybih one takes less time and gets stuff done

    • @danielmcnaughton3213
      @danielmcnaughton3213 2 года назад +115

      As a soon-to-be engineer, I wholeheartedly concur

    • @tiusverit7574
      @tiusverit7574 2 года назад +105

      @@gormauslander other can be used in nuclear science without fear of fukunobil

    • @substandard5587
      @substandard5587 2 года назад +65

      Nature will always give accurate calculations ... also my brain empty and physics can be hard.

  • @noblesseoblige319
    @noblesseoblige319 5 лет назад +5004

    "Hahahaha Rangers."
    I felt that on a spiritual level

  • @koboldcrusader
    @koboldcrusader 4 года назад +6011

    Y'know, I can sum up the Artillerist subclass with one sentence:
    *"The primary use of this weapon is violating the Geneva Convention."*

    • @tanith117
      @tanith117 3 года назад +280

      Alchemist: who cares about the FDA?

    • @Trench1919A4
      @Trench1919A4 3 года назад +147

      Is prop blocking a warcrime?

    • @Bluecho4
      @Bluecho4 3 года назад +167

      Then again, half the spells in the PHB would probably violate the Geneva Convention. Isn't that right, Heat Metal?

    • @GlizzyGoblin757
      @GlizzyGoblin757 3 года назад +13

      😐reddit joke war crim funy hha 😐

    • @siegfried1422
      @siegfried1422 3 года назад +67

      Just remember, in Faerûn, it's an optional Geneva Suggestion.

  • @spindash64
    @spindash64 3 года назад +5146

    “I cast Eldritch Blast”
    “I cast Magic Missile”
    “I seduce”
    “I rage”
    I cast _GUN_

  • @marcusk.4369
    @marcusk.4369 5 лет назад +6177

    "The Alchemist can help you grow closer with your pets"
    TOO.
    SOON.

  • @FondlesHandles
    @FondlesHandles 3 года назад +381

    Made an artificer. Our rogue was a kleptomaniac, so I made some juicy bait in the firm of a locked safe I always kept near me. Always talked about it, finding ways to bring it up in game, always suspicious. Finally, our rogue got too interested in the contents, and while everyone was sleeping, picked the lock. He found out the hard way that the contents were a spring loaded boxing glove and some indelible paint.

  • @blackstone1a
    @blackstone1a 4 года назад +10364

    Playing an Artificer be like: “Harry Potter and the Second Amendment”

    • @ziyair2998
      @ziyair2998 4 года назад +84

      @Viktor Magnusson i dont understand why youre saying what

    • @ziyair2998
      @ziyair2998 4 года назад +302

      @Viktor Magnusson second amendment, as in from the constitution. The right to bear arms, I assume you're not American?

    • @Jiffles
      @Jiffles 4 года назад +240

      @Viktor Magnusson Second amendment isn't an apology or mistake, it's the right to have guns in USA.

    • @blackstone1a
      @blackstone1a 4 года назад +196

      Viktor Magnusson It’s a joke on how you’re a spellcaster with a gun

    • @Ariaelyne
      @Ariaelyne 4 года назад +57

      @@Jiffles Technically it's the right to have a ready militia to defend the republic, but reading only the second part of it is fine as well (The point being a republican fear that having a standing army would lead to a military coup, hence the need of the people to be able to defend the republic)

  • @hamburgersandwich4273
    @hamburgersandwich4273 5 лет назад +8197

    Enemy: en guard
    Artificer: *pulls out sword and starts battling*
    Artificer: *throws sword*
    Enemy: you fool
    Artificer: well you see the sword was never my weapon of choice
    Artificer: *pulls out glock*

    • @thehighwayman3122
      @thehighwayman3122 5 лет назад +1095

      Or, even better,
      Artificer: *Throws sword*
      Enemy: You fool
      Sword: *Starts fighting on it's own*
      Artificer: You were saying?

    • @morphingninja
      @morphingninja 5 лет назад +220

      I throw my returning handax.

    • @Lunar_Inferno
      @Lunar_Inferno 5 лет назад +146

      I see you're a man of Slimecicle aswell

    • @chairulimran9205
      @chairulimran9205 5 лет назад +98

      Another guard: my lord is that legal?

    • @xonolia5661
      @xonolia5661 5 лет назад +39

      Percy that you?

  • @neinherman9989
    @neinherman9989 5 лет назад +3379

    "Because keeping track of more than one thing on the board is hard, isn't that right dungeon master?" xD

    • @josiahtasich6073
      @josiahtasich6073 4 года назад +136

      I just love the unimpressed look on the DM's face that he draws. It is by far. The most accurate thing he shows about DnD: that is not to say, that I don't think some of the other things he says or does aren't accurate. But despite that picture of the DM being mainly being used as a satirical material, it is pretty true to life.

    • @TrojanGamer10
      @TrojanGamer10 4 года назад +13

      }: |
      Edit: Made it a little more accurate

    • @gothgamergrill
      @gothgamergrill 4 года назад +8

      *Muffled Angry DM sounds*

    • @Ghostbat007
      @Ghostbat007 4 года назад +3

      I felt that

    • @archmagetyler
      @archmagetyler 4 года назад +3

      This is why roll 20 exists.

  • @ChezDispenser
    @ChezDispenser 4 года назад +3550

    "from a vibrator to a vibe-rater"
    UNDERRATED JOKE.

    • @pa7764
      @pa7764 4 года назад +19

      I thought thats what he said but Vi-berater(berator?) also makes sense if that monster is called a 'Vi', and he's berating it.
      A long shot, vibe-rater sounds better but doesn't really fit the cartoon I thought?

    • @titusshaver6983
      @titusshaver6983 4 года назад +36

      Patrik Axberg this comment does not pass the vibe check.

    • @azericthetraveller6355
      @azericthetraveller6355 4 года назад +29

      I always thought of it as the “Vibe Raider”

    • @hoppyhopper2020
      @hoppyhopper2020 4 года назад +4

      @@azericthetraveller6355 Same here

    • @thesunwillneverset
      @thesunwillneverset 4 года назад +11

      @@pa7764 You could say 'rating' something would be equivalent to 'checking' it, hence *vibe check-er*.

  • @DavidTriphon
    @DavidTriphon 5 лет назад +416

    1:47 "Can help you grow closer bonds with your pets!"
    Edward...

    • @matt-ti8yw
      @matt-ti8yw 5 лет назад +16

      Edward, Edward... big brother Edward.

    • @oligb1469
      @oligb1469 5 лет назад +14

      @@matt-ti8yw NOPE! You just nope

    • @matt-ti8yw
      @matt-ti8yw 5 лет назад +9

      @@oligb1469those words and the scene they went with will be forever written in my memory.

    • @oligb1469
      @oligb1469 5 лет назад +3

      @@matt-ti8yw Yep and I have no Idea if you will read this cuz the last attempts got deleted

    • @SairinEarthsea
      @SairinEarthsea 5 лет назад +1

      I was looking for this comment just so I could cry.
      ;-;

  • @geromlarayos6696
    @geromlarayos6696 5 лет назад +2128

    Every other Spell Oriented class: Daniel
    Artificer: The cooler Daniel

    • @danielpascaru5956
      @danielpascaru5956 5 лет назад +19

      Hello

    • @argonburnspink1441
      @argonburnspink1441 5 лет назад +53

      Me: I throw my flask of poison at the Construct
      DM: It's a construct. It can't be affected by poison
      Me: Did i mention i imbued it with a corrodant?

    • @elecstorm3701
      @elecstorm3701 5 лет назад +4

      At 0:47 he made Markiplier's Tiny Box Tim

    • @dannybeane2069
      @dannybeane2069 4 года назад

      Hey thanks buddy, I needed that.

    • @jebengee9326
      @jebengee9326 4 года назад

      aloha

  • @stingingcashew2321
    @stingingcashew2321 3 года назад +272

    Artificer: I'm going to defeat you with the power of science, and this gun I made

    • @jlord5078
      @jlord5078 3 года назад +34

      Cleric: is it a holy gun?
      Artificer: I mean... It makes holes.

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 3 года назад +19

      @@jlord5078 "I call my cannon the Consecrator, because anyone on the receiving end becomes holy."

    • @arnovanboxem2519
      @arnovanboxem2519 3 года назад +2

      sounds like senku from doctor stone

  • @eric_moore-6126
    @eric_moore-6126 4 года назад +610

    Rogue: Steals all of Artificer's Infused Items
    Artificer: moves all the infusions onto different items, making the originals mundane

    • @theddexaggerator7884
      @theddexaggerator7884 4 года назад +14

      Hell yeah

    • @GrassPokeKing
      @GrassPokeKing 3 года назад +48

      Sounds like an excellent scam you can pull together

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 3 года назад +25

      ​@@GrassPokeKing tbh I've had to resist the urge to sell infused items. It helps that one of my artificer's values is not cheating/stealing from craftsfolk and shops.
      But also, when you run artificer, confirm with your DM whether you can dismiss infusions like spells, because if you can there are some fun shenanigans you can pull. My character got mugged once and talked his way out of it by just handing over an item, dismissing infusion, and convincing the muggers that anything relevant he had on him would just stop working if they took it.
      And that doesn't even begin to cover the shenanigans you can pull by dismissing a Bag of Holding while it's full of stuff.

    • @michaelbanks1000
      @michaelbanks1000 2 года назад +7

      @@sethb3090 lol once, I put a bag of holding in another bag of hold next to my cleptomaniac rogue. Then proceeded to push him into the portal that opened up. When the party asked me where the rogue went I told them they went to get some milk from the market.

    • @UltimusMagus
      @UltimusMagus 2 года назад +5

      @@michaelbanks1000 Then the rogue re-appears from a random portal to say "My Da' disappeared on his way to get some milk, too!" Then disappears again.

  • @nickotronick7725
    @nickotronick7725 5 лет назад +1628

    *Mentions Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture:
    Me: I'll go get the howitzers, lord Sword & Shield

    • @krvys7226
      @krvys7226 5 лет назад +79

      "Tchaikovsky no"
      "Tchaikovsky YES!"

    • @SpaceJawa
      @SpaceJawa 5 лет назад +42

      @@krvys7226 "TCHAIKOVSKY ALWAYS YES!"

    • @zlatko8051
      @zlatko8051 5 лет назад +12

      TAKE COVERRRRRR

    • @zlatko8051
      @zlatko8051 5 лет назад +9

      Also who the hell took the fuses

    • @cruelcimmcia859
      @cruelcimmcia859 5 лет назад +4

      I laughed so hard when he said it, he's my favorite composer !

  • @alitaher003
    @alitaher003 4 года назад +1889

    Playing Artificer is like that one image of Daniel Radcliffe holding a gun in each hand.

  • @DonTinker
    @DonTinker 3 года назад +421

    Wizard: I'm the nerdiest class on D&D
    Artificer: Hold my +1 Beer

    • @iddomargalit-friedman3897
      @iddomargalit-friedman3897 3 года назад +4

      Best comment here

    • @Y0G0FU
      @Y0G0FU 2 года назад +14

      No no no no! DO NOT hold his +1 Beer thats a trap!

    • @zetaking2909
      @zetaking2909 2 года назад

      like 99% sure neither of them have the CON to handle a beer +1.... and both will cause different but equally horrible/awesome outcomes if they try

    • @x808drifter
      @x808drifter Год назад +1

      Bard laughs a both of and proceeds to seduce the druid.

    • @daviddaugherty2816
      @daviddaugherty2816 Год назад +2

      Paladin smites her for cheating on her.

  • @ASquared544
    @ASquared544 4 года назад +404

    Rogue: “Hehehe, imma steal from the party”
    The Alarm, Snare, Glyph of Warding, Animated Objects and Mechanical Companion, Curses, Pitfalls, and Falling rocks set before the Long Rest: “Helo”

    • @connormcconnell7881
      @connormcconnell7881 4 года назад +41

      My artificer who has been at odds with the rouge the whole time and just woke up to him stealing his stuff "dodge that b***h"

    • @Cutie_Amor
      @Cutie_Amor 4 года назад +33

      dont forget the gun of the now fully awake artificer. Perry this you frickin casual

    • @voodooozo3755
      @voodooozo3755 3 года назад +7

      Thats a cute pfp

    • @RBAWintrow
      @RBAWintrow 3 года назад +2

      You killed him so hard, he died, to death!

    • @karltheskitarii4941
      @karltheskitarii4941 2 года назад +4

      Fun tip, use a bag of holding with glyph of warding to own a pocket nuke that the gods fear

  • @KanuckStreams
    @KanuckStreams 3 года назад +416

    Can confirm that the "Item Dupe Glitch" is absolute nonsense. Me and my two party members (me a Sorcerer, other members are a Wizard and an Artificer) were about to go into a boss fight against a dragon, we were Level...2? 3? Either way, not high and this fight would be tough.
    After a few minutes of discussion on what to do, and going over what powers the Artificer had, we decided that she would duplicate the Wand of Magic Missiles I had to make two more. After confirming through double-checking the rulebook and asking the DM, we did the duplications, all sneaked into the boss room, then unloaded all seven charges of all three wands into the boss.
    Twenty-seven d4+27 damage later, the DM described how the dragon was killed before it even woke up as it was effectively Macross Missile Massacre'd in the span of three seconds.

    • @crimsonwizahd2358
      @crimsonwizahd2358 2 года назад +65

      You guys basically unloaded a Magic Missile mini gun barrage on that poor dragon....XD

    • @romanc7658
      @romanc7658 2 года назад +26

      This is the fun shit i hope to have one day in dnd

    • @Shaun_Jones
      @Shaun_Jones 2 года назад +37

      “Order up! One dragon, fresh-ground and well-done!”

    • @sarahb.7175
      @sarahb.7175 2 года назад +24

      Dragon got a twenty-one wand salute.

    • @JaelinBezel
      @JaelinBezel Год назад +17

      As a wise man once said: “if gun not solve problem, just use more gun.”

  • @darienb1127
    @darienb1127 5 лет назад +2310

    He mentioned my favorite classical instrument,
    The Cannon.

    • @skyex
      @skyex 5 лет назад +116

      Ah yes, the primary percussion instrument used in the 1812 Overture.

    • @devonfortier7628
      @devonfortier7628 5 лет назад +34

      Tchaikovsky cannons are not instruments!

    • @TheIrrelevantYT
      @TheIrrelevantYT 5 лет назад +13

      Music to my ears.

    • @devonfortier7628
      @devonfortier7628 5 лет назад +14

      @@arthurboyle7982 ruclips.net/video/bZ9-PFes3mM/видео.html
      Oh you poor sap. You've never seen this SFM. I love obscure references.....

    • @atl4ska337
      @atl4ska337 5 лет назад +14

      Devon Fortier not with that attitude

  • @erikw.s.5209
    @erikw.s.5209 5 лет назад +3097

    "The alchemist can help you grow close bonds with your pets"
    You didn't have to do that. You really didn't.

    • @cdgamer7306
      @cdgamer7306 4 года назад +44

      Erik W. S. Don’t make me remember!!!

    • @rakisuzuki-burke4148
      @rakisuzuki-burke4148 4 года назад +95

      My artificer actually takes the Fullmetal Alchemist approach to magic. Sort of. He is an Artillerist, though.

    • @benrogers9082
      @benrogers9082 4 года назад +24

      @@rakisuzuki-burke4148 so the kylo ren approach? in last jedi?he sees lasers pounding into a target and he's just like MORE

    • @placeholdername3521
      @placeholdername3521 4 года назад +5

      Angsty genocidal teen

    • @bazzfromthebackground3696
      @bazzfromthebackground3696 4 года назад +8

      It's never soon enough.

  • @Pluveus
    @Pluveus 3 года назад +124

    1:20 This makes me want to create a Pixie NPC that buffs the party and starts each buff with "Hey!" "Listen!" and "Watch out!"

    • @Y0G0FU
      @Y0G0FU 2 года назад

      You will die a Horrible Death. Either the DM or the Party will do everything it takes to kill that Pixie ;P

    • @r.alexandercorbitt1554
      @r.alexandercorbitt1554 Год назад +1

      Aww!

    • @DLBookTheGamer
      @DLBookTheGamer 10 месяцев назад

      So essentially every pixie in video games ever.

    • @owlking195
      @owlking195 2 месяца назад

      Fey bard?

  • @JoCat
    @JoCat  5 лет назад +1425

    anyone curious of I'm doing any other crap guide to dnd videos, my most recent Q&A answers that pretty well

    • @cardboardbox331
      @cardboardbox331 5 лет назад +59

      I was just happy you were still doing it

    • @cardboardbox331
      @cardboardbox331 5 лет назад +12

      AMELIA NOLAN that is... extravageant

    • @isamuddin1
      @isamuddin1 5 лет назад +13

      Soo...... when the fight with that wizard gonna start?

    • @Rjthewolf
      @Rjthewolf 5 лет назад +2

    • @gagamer7251
      @gagamer7251 5 лет назад +14

      I feel like the artilerist is just TF2's demoman on magical steroids

  • @Vespuchian
    @Vespuchian 5 лет назад +339

    0:27 Awww, I just noticed everyone's favourite Charisma-casting couple is holding hands.
    I love these continuity gags.

    • @maximsavage
      @maximsavage 5 лет назад +17

      Holy shit, he made it canon!

    • @justanaverageferret
      @justanaverageferret 5 лет назад +40

      @@maximsavage well yes, i believe they got married in the warlock vid. It was a wonderful wedding until the warlock got bored and eldrich- *BLAST*

    • @maximsavage
      @maximsavage 5 лет назад

      @@justanaverageferret Welp, now I gotta re-watch that video. Can't say I'm mad about it though, it was a good video.

    • @NevisYsbryd
      @NevisYsbryd 5 лет назад +2

      @@maximsavage Nah, he made it cannon. Artificer needs vengeance for that eldritch blast.

    • @thomasallen9974
      @thomasallen9974 5 лет назад +2

      You can try to say no to the Bard only so long and then its a Nat 20 your in that bed half naked

  • @BigJubble
    @BigJubble 4 года назад +2239

    I kinda miss the old artificer before this more official one came out, mostly because I enjoyed having the magical shotgun called a thunder cannon that canonically sounds like the clap of Thor's asscheeks when fired, with roughly the same destructive power.

    • @finderfinder4290
      @finderfinder4290 4 года назад +115

      Well the ua armorer subclass has thunder canons, so it looks like they arent abandoning all cut features

    • @SenorFluffy
      @SenorFluffy 4 года назад +63

      I only slightly miss my life before reading this

    • @stefanusbayu1426
      @stefanusbayu1426 4 года назад +40

      Read it with techpriest's sounds

    • @kelmirosue3251
      @kelmirosue3251 4 года назад +20

      Kinda sound like Crap Guide. Do you too worship the sword and shield?

    • @BigJubble
      @BigJubble 4 года назад +11

      @@kelmirosue3251 Nah, more of a greatsword/lance kind of guy in MHW.

  • @exohammer1
    @exohammer1 5 лет назад +949

    Ah, yes, the three artificer subclasses: Alcoholic, Engineer and Log.

    • @kylenguyen7371
      @kylenguyen7371 5 лет назад +23

      🎵 Everyone loves a Log! 🎶 - Ren & Stimpy

    • @aaronwebb1548
      @aaronwebb1548 5 лет назад +18

      What goes down stairs, alone or in pairs,
      Runs over your neighbour's dog?
      It's great for a snack, it fits on your back,
      It's log log log!

    • @SerKnightGuy
      @SerKnightGuy 5 лет назад +9

      Don't forget the new one! The one that talks to rocks.

    • @facelessidiot6407
      @facelessidiot6407 5 лет назад +26

      Praise Oreyara I guess?

    • @zoestrassfield248
      @zoestrassfield248 5 лет назад +2

      And the one who got cut, 1-800-Psychic-Friends.

  • @cardboardbox331
    @cardboardbox331 5 лет назад +1569

    0:29 “the stat is about as common as your room is for sexy times”
    Man that hit home

  • @leffeup8117
    @leffeup8117 2 года назад +162

    I love the description in tashas cauldron for artillerist. Its something along the lines of: “some artificers ask the real questions, could there be more collateral damage?”

    • @swampy7116
      @swampy7116 Год назад +23

      "Hey look buddy I'm an engineer, that means I solve problems. Not problems like 'what is beauty?' because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy. I solve practical problems."

    • @xenocross6597
      @xenocross6597 Год назад +14

      @@swampy7116 For example: What if some mean mother hubbard is trying to tear me a structurally superflous new behind? The answer? Use a gun.

  • @3onito
    @3onito 5 лет назад +2609

    I’ve been seeing a lot of Fullmetal Alchemist references here...
    I love it.

    • @AaronCorr
      @AaronCorr 5 лет назад +85

      Bringing you and your pet closer...

    • @aspacegamer92
      @aspacegamer92 5 лет назад +12

      I also would love it if not for that horrific Szene in Fullmetal Alchemist BH ..... ahhh i can‘t forget it

    • @dragonITH-nk3yk
      @dragonITH-nk3yk 5 лет назад +19

      I haven't really watched FMA but I know enough about it to know that Sho Tucker is a right bastard.

    • @OmegaGamer04
      @OmegaGamer04 5 лет назад +7

      @Thatguywiththestuffies RUclips page. Don't want to spoil anything but he is still a bastard in that one as well.

    • @Soraking007
      @Soraking007 5 лет назад +5

      The cannon is a reference to the show as well also the ps2 game

  • @WingZX1103
    @WingZX1103 5 лет назад +211

    It’s almost an unwritten rule that any subclass that involves a pet has to be better than beast master ranger

    • @jakkaljakobie8774
      @jakkaljakobie8774 5 лет назад +18

      As someone whose played along a beastmaster ranger and a beastmaster Hunter in wow, I can confirm you are correct.

  • @caleb688
    @caleb688 4 года назад +1581

    Alchemist: I love the smell of Napalm in the morning. Smells like… VICTORY.
    Artillerist: Hey, look, buddy. I’m an Engineer.
    Battlesmith: Would you do it for a Scooby Snack?

    • @jexiagalleta4712
      @jexiagalleta4712 4 года назад +138

      And that means I solve problems

    • @demi-femme4821
      @demi-femme4821 4 года назад +129

      @@jexiagalleta4712 Not problems like "What is beauty?", because that would fall under the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.

    • @dragonarchive7443
      @dragonarchive7443 4 года назад +112

      I solve practical problems
      * takes a sip of beer, heavy dying in the background *

    • @epsreborn9718
      @epsreborn9718 4 года назад +116

      @@dragonarchive7443 "For instance, how am I gonna stop a big mean mother hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous new behind?" *cut to a turret turning sharply and gunning down someone offscreen*

    • @simonevans2552
      @simonevans2552 4 года назад +49

      Armorer: "I will endure a thousand deaths before I yield"

  • @jackunova7284
    @jackunova7284 5 лет назад +3505

    Quick question:
    Is Slibs coincidentally the goblin that made friends with the tank mage in the wizard video?

    • @jackunova7284
      @jackunova7284 5 лет назад +186

      Oh cool! I got a pin.
      Thanks!
      EDIT: Holy. I wasn't expecting that comment to get so popular. Thanks for 1.1K, so far, as well as a pin.

    • @TheGuardDuck
      @TheGuardDuck 5 лет назад +123

      I guess that's a "yes"?

    • @tenacityxl
      @tenacityxl 5 лет назад +45

      It is now!

    • @maximsavage
      @maximsavage 5 лет назад +95

      Waaaaaar magic-is-like Tank Mage, getting-lots-of Defense, flexing-as-you-cast BLOCKBLOCKBLOCKBLOCKBLOCKBLOCKBLOCK!

    • @mostlyjoe
      @mostlyjoe 5 лет назад +12

      Kobold, but yes.

  • @Kaarl_Mills
    @Kaarl_Mills 5 лет назад +641

    "The stat is as commonly used for spellcasting as your bedroom is used for sexy times"
    Damn not even Anakin got roasted that hard

    • @BookWyrmOnAString
      @BookWyrmOnAString 4 года назад +5

      Should I leave the 70th like or leave perfection as it is?

    • @magmat0585
      @magmat0585 4 года назад +2

      harsh, but not inaccurate... :/

    • @WildDragonSong
      @WildDragonSong 4 года назад +1

      His burns are stronger than *the high ground.*

    • @rossstone3885
      @rossstone3885 4 года назад +5

      But the intelligence state IS used... so that means my bedroom eventually will be used for sexy times? Let’s hope

    • @boserzipfelmann4629
      @boserzipfelmann4629 4 года назад +3

      Technically, TECHNICALLY, not that hard of a roast.
      There are 4 classes that use INT as a spellcasting ability (Wizards and Artificer, obviously, but also the subclasses Eldritch Knight and Arcane trickster).
      Besides those, there are 7 other classes using different spellcasting abilities.
      So, 4 times out of 11 the use of ones bedroom would be sexy time. Since (usually) one uses the bedroom to sleep in, (usually) once per day, that would make 4 instances of sexy time per 7 instances of sleepy time. Getting laid 4 times a week doesnt sound half bad at all, especially considering the other person (or persons) involved in aforementioned sexy time also has a bedroom to be used!
      Thereby, my point stands, that the poor slave/mommas boy/racing prodigy/jedi-knight/child-murderer you mention got roasted significantly more thoroughly than the dear viewer did.
      ...except for this one here, since I use my room to watch nerdy DnD-Videos at 1 AM and taking 15 minutes to make a reply to a perfectly funny comment, that did not whatsoever require any smartassing, technical correction.

  • @manicseacucumbers4194
    @manicseacucumbers4194 3 года назад +378

    Am I allowed to make my artificer’s backstory something like “they were kicked out of magic school and is running from the law due to a certain incident concerning a handheld eldritch cannon”

    • @AndorRadnai
      @AndorRadnai 3 года назад +34

      Call them Chad Kovsky and you may..!

    • @JaelinBezel
      @JaelinBezel 3 года назад +38

      Dude I came up with an npc from my character's backstory who is a goblin forge cleric/artificer who, last he heard, was working on a giant cannon with rotating glyphs that is supposed to repeatedly cast Fireball at a rate of twice per second. Needless to say, she is now forbidden from working on her inventions on temple grounds.

    • @capitantonayan9370
      @capitantonayan9370 3 года назад +17

      @@AndorRadnai don't mind me, i'm gonna steal the name for my next artificer

    • @AndorRadnai
      @AndorRadnai 3 года назад +6

      @@capitantonayan9370 Please do!

    • @Y0G0FU
      @Y0G0FU 2 года назад +5

      My Artificer Backstory: Wanted to do Magic but somehow it didnt work out. Depressed he someday saw a Machine explode and went thinking: I DO THIS INSTEAD! So now he throws explosives instead of fireballs and buffs his gear ;P

  • @RedNovaStorm
    @RedNovaStorm 5 лет назад +103

    1:36 Ah yes, my 3 favourite sub-classes: Alcohol, Gun and Log.

    • @tkurz3071
      @tkurz3071 5 лет назад +13

      Praise Oreyara!

  • @tenacityxl
    @tenacityxl 5 лет назад +893

    Artificer: the hipster wizard who is apparently really good at robotics.

    • @davidebombardelli8255
      @davidebombardelli8255 5 лет назад +15

      or the alter ego of the pathfinder alchemist

    • @LordDragox412
      @LordDragox412 5 лет назад +41

      Artificer is just a mechanic who wasn't told there was magic in DnD.

    • @paige_404
      @paige_404 5 лет назад +5

      @@davidebombardelli8255 Or just... the Artificer from 3.5's Eberron setting

    • @davidebombardelli8255
      @davidebombardelli8255 5 лет назад +2

      @@paige_404 Is that really old?

    • @paige_404
      @paige_404 5 лет назад +1

      @@davidebombardelli8255 older than Pathfinder's Alchemist

  • @magpiewillow
    @magpiewillow 3 года назад +213

    The artillerist artificer looks at the bard with a smile, "Tchaikovsky" he says with a nod. A sinister smile grows on the bards face as he readies his violin. The bard, playing the 1812 Overture casts Otto's Irresistible Dance, and the artificer, with his cannon ready, fires in time with the bard. The party stands stunned, unsure of what they are seeing, but clearly understanding that they shouldn't let those two within twenty feet of each other ever again.

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 3 года назад +25

      Can confirm, bard/artificer pair can drop the sickest of beats

    • @lupenngrimpaw936
      @lupenngrimpaw936 2 года назад +8

      That good person, is beautiful.

    • @sarahb.7175
      @sarahb.7175 2 года назад +7

      I'm designing an artificer, and I'm screenshotting this for eternity.

    • @KX231-c3o
      @KX231-c3o Год назад +2

      G U N M U S I C

  • @goldlink567
    @goldlink567 5 лет назад +1281

    "Closer bonds with pets"
    *Shows Nina and Alexander* Wow, dark.
    Funny, but dark.

  • @vijayanand6650
    @vijayanand6650 4 года назад +81

    I realized this class officially came out for 5e after JoCat started this series. There aren’t nearly as many stereotypes for this class. Which means JoCat gets to help create those stereotypes.

    • @dali3839
      @dali3839 3 года назад +9

      Hoarders that distract themselves easily and hyperfixates over things easily.
      They also collect stuff from the ground...

  • @maxmartin274
    @maxmartin274 4 года назад +176

    I'm gonna make a Bardificer. I have a big gun that plays Flight of the Valkyries every time it shoots

    • @spindash64
      @spindash64 3 года назад +6

      You better make a magical helicopter to go with it

    • @Zombiewithabowtie
      @Zombiewithabowtie 3 года назад +9

      I want to use this multiclass with a Warforged and make Big Band from Skullgirls

    • @gingerinajacket8519
      @gingerinajacket8519 3 года назад +3

      @@spindash64 Then it would play Fortunate Son, would it not

    • @warmachine5835
      @warmachine5835 2 года назад +1

      @@gingerinajacket8519 you haven't seen Apocalypse Now have you?
      Charlie don't surf.

    • @mercwiththemouthsnewphone6798
      @mercwiththemouthsnewphone6798 2 года назад +1

      @@Zombiewithabowtie
      Yes

  • @pathfindersavant3988
    @pathfindersavant3988 5 лет назад +574

    "And help you grow closer with your pets"
    *[screaming resumes again]*

  • @DavidTriphon
    @DavidTriphon 5 лет назад +128

    "We all have our weird urges but seriously get a server room"
    I am definitely using this phrase with my friends.

  • @giuseppecapici581
    @giuseppecapici581 4 года назад +188

    "Magic Is dumb and stupid and makes no sense"
    -any demacian soldier

    • @bthsr7113
      @bthsr7113 4 года назад +14

      Those guys and gals are mostly paladins and fighters. Artificers are more like Piltover and Zaun.

    • @beast_pasta2392
      @beast_pasta2392 3 года назад

      Would that make Noxus barbarians?

    • @giuseppecapici581
      @giuseppecapici581 3 года назад +1

      @@beast_pasta2392 probably, and most ionians should be monks, or at least some of them

    • @SilentGlaceon94
      @SilentGlaceon94 3 года назад +1

      @@beast_pasta2392 Eh, Kat and Talon are rouges, Draven's a bard (Gladiator), Darius is a fighter, and Cassie's a mage.

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 3 года назад +4

      I guess that makes Aurelion Sol the DM

  • @cubeofcompanioning
    @cubeofcompanioning 5 лет назад +284

    That... that FMA reference was uncalled for
    But amazing xD

  • @elsquisheeone
    @elsquisheeone 5 лет назад +359

    0:27
    aww, bard and paladin are holding hands

    • @abyssdreamer6286
      @abyssdreamer6286 4 года назад +13

      Too bad the bard can’t keep it in their pants )’:

    • @Reginald_Ritmo
      @Reginald_Ritmo 4 года назад +46

      No its fine. They were wed in the warlock episode

    • @abyssdreamer6286
      @abyssdreamer6286 4 года назад +4

      pixels GamR oh dang yay

    • @tafua_a
      @tafua_a 4 года назад +7

      They're married after all

    • @Zombiewithabowtie
      @Zombiewithabowtie 4 года назад +26

      @@Reginald_Ritmo The ceremony went almost flawlessly...
      "I now declare you wed. You may kiss the- *ELDRITCH BLRAAAAP* "

  • @little_wintry3098
    @little_wintry3098 3 года назад +320

    "Alchemist can help you grow closer with your pets"
    me: damn, really? lemme check out that class-
    *while looking over class details
    *joke suddenly clicks
    me: waIT-

    • @ohno6528
      @ohno6528 3 года назад +5

      I dont understand...

    • @demonminer8093
      @demonminer8093 3 года назад +16

      @@ohno6528 watch fulmetal alchemist, and you'll get it.

    • @timwoods2852
      @timwoods2852 3 года назад +13

      @@ohno6528 Or don't, if you still want a working heart.

    • @ohno6528
      @ohno6528 3 года назад +2

      @@timwoods2852 did they kill the cat

    • @timwoods2852
      @timwoods2852 3 года назад +5

      @@ohno6528 It has to do with the girl and the dog he showed on screen.

  • @deltaphant_
    @deltaphant_ 5 лет назад +157

    When you said you'd be taking a break in November I didn't expect a video December 1st, but I am not complaining to ANY extent

  • @chicagobreed502
    @chicagobreed502 5 лет назад +644

    This video was so big brain I crafted another sword and shield

    • @theflaasmomflyr8691
      @theflaasmomflyr8691 5 лет назад +1

      👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • @nintendocaprimoon63
    @nintendocaprimoon63 3 года назад +101

    The Armorer in TCE is literally just being iron man, it's fantastic

    • @charlescrews1623
      @charlescrews1623 3 года назад +3

      Dude Ik my dm let me pretty have two active at once I just switch between them and allows me to make modifications

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 3 года назад +5

      @@charlescrews1623 RAW you can change your armor type during a long rest

    • @stm7810
      @stm7810 9 месяцев назад

      @@sethb3090 short rest actually only takes 1 hour, it also replaces any missing body parts.

    • @sethb3090
      @sethb3090 9 месяцев назад +1

      @@stm7810 seriously? That's so dumb...meanwhile, artillerist has to use a long rest to switch to a different arcane focus

    • @stm7810
      @stm7810 9 месяцев назад

      @@sethb3090 I guess changing what you wear is easier than the arcane, please ignore that mechanically speaking it is flat out cyberware.

  • @travvyyyy8437
    @travvyyyy8437 5 лет назад +629

    So basically, “I’m not like other wizards”

    • @jorgecabrera3694
      @jorgecabrera3694 5 лет назад +19

      You see...I'm not the same wizard you face, I'm a super wizard

    • @thornangel16
      @thornangel16 4 года назад +23

      Why be a wizard when you can be Wile E. Coyote, Super Genius.

    • @kanjigodomo9696
      @kanjigodomo9696 4 года назад +3

      @@thornangel16 Don't you mean Mud?

    • @thornangel16
      @thornangel16 4 года назад +1

      @@kanjigodomo9696 Yes.

    • @knightx605
      @knightx605 4 года назад +6

      Arcane Tricksters use Intelligence for their "casting".

  • @KanuckStreams
    @KanuckStreams 5 лет назад +138

    "Isn't that right, Dungeon Master?"
    *gasp* JoCat addressed me personally! And yes, it is a PAIN.

  • @mistwraith8260
    @mistwraith8260 4 года назад +57

    "and can help you grow closer bonds with your pets"
    Me: *somehow manages to choke on air*

  • @lodoly3368
    @lodoly3368 5 лет назад +569

    Man, we really need a crap guide to Dungeon Master.

  • @Zahnpuppy
    @Zahnpuppy 5 лет назад +931

    "close bonds with their pets"
    me- dies a lot inside.
    thanks for reminding me bud.

    • @haosmagnaingram6992
      @haosmagnaingram6992 5 лет назад +39

      Ed... ward

    • @jordanpritchard5226
      @jordanpritchard5226 5 лет назад +32

      @@haosmagnaingram6992 You are grounded!
      "So is Hughes."
      *FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU-!!!*

    • @bradreed2001
      @bradreed2001 5 лет назад +29

      @@jordanpritchard5226 I just finished that episode ten minutes ago. It almost rained in my house

    • @danielpage1429
      @danielpage1429 5 лет назад +15

      @@bradreed2001 Its a terrible day for rain.

    • @danielpage1429
      @danielpage1429 5 лет назад +10

      Always too soon.

  • @mavorenborsteel6765
    @mavorenborsteel6765 4 года назад +68

    Artificer: *Pulls out Gun*
    BEHOLD THE MOST POWERFUL SPELL OF ALL! ARE YOU READY TO MEET GOD?

    • @NerdyCatCoffeeee
      @NerdyCatCoffeeee 2 года назад +2

      collateral damage? more like unidentified enemy combatants

    • @articusramos808
      @articusramos808 Год назад

      Gunmage: sweet...but what caliber?

  • @TheInsider15
    @TheInsider15 5 лет назад +1199

    "And suddenly you wake up to the sound of Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture." Someone's a fan of Ratchet and Clank I take it?

    • @Someone-sq8im
      @Someone-sq8im 4 года назад +10

      yES.

    • @articusramos808
      @articusramos808 4 года назад +19

      WHERE DID YOU GET THAT RYNO?!

    • @robertsilvermyst7325
      @robertsilvermyst7325 4 года назад +18

      Or V for Vendetta

    • @tomhill3248
      @tomhill3248 4 года назад +7

      Eh? I love Ratchet and clank but even I don't get that one.

    • @Alakaizer
      @Alakaizer 4 года назад +14

      @@tomhill3248 the RYNO V in A Crack in Time played it while you fired it.

  • @GatsbyMusic
    @GatsbyMusic 5 лет назад +423

    Artilerist be like: *hey look buddy I'm an engineer*

    • @enigmaodell6806
      @enigmaodell6806 5 лет назад +75

      I solve problems. practical problems.

    • @MissFeatherstone
      @MissFeatherstone 5 лет назад +61

      Not problems like "What is beauty?" Because that would fall within the purview of your conundrums of philosophy.

    • @irregularassassin6380
      @irregularassassin6380 5 лет назад +55

      Problems like, 'how am I gonna stop some mean Mother Hubbard from tearing me a structurally superfluous new behind?'

    • @katelystt
      @katelystt 5 лет назад +46

      the answer is a gun, and if that don't work... use more gun.

    • @brem-
      @brem- 5 лет назад +39

      Take for instance this heavy caliber tripod mounted lil' old number designed by me, built by me.

  • @codyriddle1424
    @codyriddle1424 4 года назад +20

    BBEG: “You fools! You have wasted all of your spells trying to damage me, but you have all failed.”
    Artificer: “BEHOLD: The most powerful spell of all... I CAST BULLET!”

  • @KingWoop72
    @KingWoop72 5 лет назад +128

    My fave class got the roast it so desperately deserves
    Thank you JoCrap

  • @riadirige7804
    @riadirige7804 5 лет назад +70

    "and no im not gonna cover all the new classes. Shut up 'cause I want to take a vacation with my sword and shield already"
    Classic.

  • @xenotundra3346
    @xenotundra3346 4 года назад +26

    When you’re playing a beast master and the party paladin befriends a wolf and the DM gives them your entire subclass for free .-.

  • @TeamOneDay
    @TeamOneDay 5 лет назад +363

    "Get a server room"
    *Underrated joke.*

  • @Nap1300
    @Nap1300 5 лет назад +243

    I just realized Bard is holding hands with Paladin now.
    Adorable.

    • @danielf.7151
      @danielf.7151 5 лет назад +6

      OMg I hadn't noticed until you pointed it out. Cute

    • @Daelyah
      @Daelyah 5 лет назад +5

      Bard can seduce the pants off of _anyone..._ 😆

    • @djmccarthy4859
      @djmccarthy4859 5 лет назад +6

      Where, the Bard is on the other side of the table from the ELF PALADIN

    • @danielf.7151
      @danielf.7151 5 лет назад +27

      @@djmccarthy4859 They meant at 0:27

    • @Introbulus
      @Introbulus 4 года назад +2

      @@danielf.7151 Thank you.

  • @michaellyle859
    @michaellyle859 2 года назад +15

    0:32 “What hit points? I have AC” I felt that one so much. I’m playing an artificer in my group’s current campaign and due to a combination of blur and my enhanced defense shield my DM hasn’t hit me with a single direct attack yet. Only splash damage and puzzle/trap things like flame throwers.

    • @mongodroid4842
      @mongodroid4842 2 года назад +1

      what is your DM's discord? i want to tell him about something that starts with "Dex Saves"

  • @1098234567
    @1098234567 5 лет назад +236

    "Just make sure you lock them up so the rogue doesnt steal them." Let me just say, as a rogue, this is super good advice

    • @sirpotatoaim4578
      @sirpotatoaim4578 4 года назад +7

      and yes, cannons are instuments

    • @aquila4460
      @aquila4460 4 года назад +4

      I mean yeah, you can loot a lock as well.

    • @connormcconnell7881
      @connormcconnell7881 4 года назад +2

      I make a homebrew rule that I have to give the other person the ability to use them so I don't wake up to 18 12 ovicher

    • @obsidianbeast6308
      @obsidianbeast6308 4 года назад +6

      As a guy who plays as artillerist with a kleptomaniac wizard I be more worried about the wizard trying to get their hands on it

    • @snore178
      @snore178 4 года назад +4

      YOU STAY THE HECK AWAY FROM MY WING MOUNTED CALTROP DROPPER

  • @kayleestout6436
    @kayleestout6436 5 лет назад +51

    So, I'm a new DM that specializes in new players, and I always show them your videos before they even get to make their characters. So the first 30 minutes of the creation session is us dying of laughter and some of them actually learning something.

  • @joeljokivuori1059
    @joeljokivuori1059 3 года назад +19

    "Can power up their allies by drinking and gambling"
    I have found my true class.

  • @uniporndev8390
    @uniporndev8390 5 лет назад +108

    "And help you have stronger bonds with your pets"
    Yikes that got dark.

  • @dolphinboi-playmonsterranc9668
    @dolphinboi-playmonsterranc9668 5 лет назад +56

    "Hey Barbarian, you can use your muscles to lift that thing" Omochao the Artificer

    • @Renorick1
      @Renorick1 5 лет назад

      "Lift with your legs!"
      "Straighten your back!"
      "Widen your stance!"

  • @theimperiumofman102
    @theimperiumofman102 3 года назад +35

    There’s a friend in our party who picked artificer and they have the alchemy jug, and they refuse to stop making Mayonnaise with it, it has gotten to the point at which the DM has said they have a lowered charisma because of the pungent smell of several gallons of rancid Mayo.

    • @stm7810
      @stm7810 9 месяцев назад

      but they're just making an instrument.

    • @theimperiumofman102
      @theimperiumofman102 9 месяцев назад +2

      @@stm7810 I played as a bard and I would not touch that with a 10ft immovable rod

    • @stm7810
      @stm7810 9 месяцев назад

      @@theimperiumofman102 funny enough an artificer can become proficent in more instruments than a bard.

  • @DownWithLogic
    @DownWithLogic 5 лет назад +102

    Rafiki voice: "The king, has returned."

  • @ConjureKarp
    @ConjureKarp 5 лет назад +343

    The Artificer is a goblin.
    *_THATS TOO ADORABLE!!_*

    • @sikuku5957
      @sikuku5957 5 лет назад +10

      Goblinslayer enters the chat.

    • @LordDragox412
      @LordDragox412 5 лет назад +10

      Spurt was the first artificer.

    • @SilvrSavior
      @SilvrSavior 5 лет назад +25

      CAP (Crap Adventure Party): Hello fellow adventure how may we help you?
      Goblin Slayer: "I'm here to check if your goblin is a good goblin."
      CAP: He certainly is! He is right over there.
      GS: It doesn't look that good.
      CAP: What do you mean?
      GS: It's breathing.

    • @barrybend7189
      @barrybend7189 5 лет назад +2

      Gork and Mork: happy Ork noises.

    • @CathrineMacNiel
      @CathrineMacNiel 5 лет назад

      @@LordDragox412 How long do Kobolds live, ... Spurt?

  • @Jenazad.
    @Jenazad. 4 года назад +437

    "Tiny Box Tim" long time no see little buddy...

    • @cassidywoodliff
      @cassidywoodliff 4 года назад +20

      Jenazad So happy I’m not the only one who noticed it!

    • @Elery7335
      @Elery7335 4 года назад +6

      Same

    • @marbles4442
      @marbles4442 4 года назад +5

      Yesh

    • @arlinabloodgrave
      @arlinabloodgrave 4 года назад +17

      Does this mean that Markiplier is an Artificer if he was a D&D class lol

    • @ForeverLovePizza
      @ForeverLovePizza 4 года назад +2

      I figured I wouldn't have been the only person to see that.

  • @riccardocastiglioni1611
    @riccardocastiglioni1611 5 лет назад +447

    "I'm not covering the new subclasses!"
    Ok, fair.... but what about the Races?

    • @krvys7226
      @krvys7226 5 лет назад +24

      He hasn't covered any of the races yet, sooooo.....

    • @TheOverArchiver
      @TheOverArchiver 5 лет назад +8

      I believe he said he would, but don’t quote me on that.

    • @Kai_Mercer
      @Kai_Mercer 5 лет назад +81

      @@TheOverArchiver "I believe he said he would but dont quote me on that"

    • @michaelmarksman743
      @michaelmarksman743 5 лет назад +6

      The king Of flames
      Nice

    • @TheOverArchiver
      @TheOverArchiver 5 лет назад +2

      The king Of flames Ha ha.

  • @dercarrot991
    @dercarrot991 5 лет назад +80

    0:57 that, that’s just cold
    Alchemist: “You can get closer to your pets” GOD DAMMIT WHY YOU GOTTA DO THIS

  • @IrishSoyBoy
    @IrishSoyBoy 4 года назад +14

    0:26
    The paladin and bard are holding hands. The lore is expanding.

  • @lenaoxton3999
    @lenaoxton3999 5 лет назад +77

    Vibrator to Vibe-Rater
    Yep, JoCat is one cunning linguist.

  • @blunk778
    @blunk778 5 лет назад +16

    1:37 AWWW ITS LOG!!! Good to see you still got some Rat in ya.

  • @JohnnyDoeman
    @JohnnyDoeman 4 года назад +18

    0:10 Well, there's now ProjektMelody and her Science Team. So, this was a pretty accurate guess.

  • @tristanmorrell6269
    @tristanmorrell6269 5 лет назад +373

    “A Crap Guide to D&D [5th Edition] - Dungeon Master” anyone?

    • @JoCat
      @JoCat  5 лет назад +30

      my Q&A answers that

    • @rubiroman8121
      @rubiroman8121 5 лет назад

      Why isint the artificers in ny players handbook

    • @chaoticzer0688
      @chaoticzer0688 5 лет назад

      Rubi Roman It’s a new class that’s not in the PHB I believe it came out in the Guide to Ebberon. Just google the class and you’ll get what you need

  • @oivatank
    @oivatank 5 лет назад +90

    0:46 In the distance: _"My little biscuit!"_

    • @ClamMimic
      @ClamMimic 4 года назад +2

      "He's so tiiny!"

  • @samuelparchment1908
    @samuelparchment1908 4 года назад +11

    Aw, the Bard and Paladin are holding hands in the group caster shot. That is just adorable.

  • @luckyisdumb6396
    @luckyisdumb6396 5 лет назад +192

    0:47
    Tiny box Tim? I haven't seen you in years jesus

    • @kchgamer1788
      @kchgamer1788 5 лет назад +7

      Lucky isDumb HEY HERE WE GO, I was looking for it

    • @SolstaceWinters
      @SolstaceWinters 5 лет назад +9

      Weirdly, I did, in Mark's video today "3 Scary Games: #34".

    • @luckyisdumb6396
      @luckyisdumb6396 5 лет назад +6

      @@SolstaceWinters I watched that video today after this one and I was started having a crisis. I don't know why my brain just decided to go into crisis mode

    • @necroarcanistxiii
      @necroarcanistxiii 5 лет назад +2

      Well, Markiplier hasn't really featured Tim in a lot of videos lately, a mascot's gotta make a living somehow. Sad when a creator's fandom jokes start to fade away.

    • @magnusvaldez3201
      @magnusvaldez3201 5 лет назад

      Yaaayyy tiny box Tim cameo

  • @pengun8683
    @pengun8683 5 лет назад +143

    0:26
    The Paladin is holding the Bard’s hand. Yes!

    • @LordThomasPassion
      @LordThomasPassion 4 года назад +5

      A paladin with a teefling? Really?

    • @pengun8683
      @pengun8683 4 года назад +20

      Don’t you kink-shame them.

    • @mikerueffer579
      @mikerueffer579 4 года назад +4

      @@pengun8683 kink shamming is my kink!

    • @roguepsykerhaaker4813
      @roguepsykerhaaker4813 4 года назад +8

      @@LordThomasPassion I mean, caring for someone despite their cursed lineage is pretty paladin tbh

    • @althelor
      @althelor 3 года назад

      @@roguepsykerhaaker4813 besides, paladins aren't inherently "holy" or anti-demon contrary to popular belief. Their power comes from their oath specifically, which could really be anything. So a paladin getting together with someone with demon blood is not at all off the table.

  • @highqualitywritinginstrument
    @highqualitywritinginstrument 3 года назад +36

    "The artificer can help you grow closer to your pets"
    Wanna know what percentage of the audience got that 😳

  • @rohamm_9238
    @rohamm_9238 5 лет назад +18

    “Help’s you grow closer bonds with your pets” 1:48 this is too much depression in my Jocat video

  • @joelpeary3172
    @joelpeary3172 5 лет назад +28

    It has returned
    Long live the sword and sheild.

  • @rimurutempest4945
    @rimurutempest4945 4 года назад +9

    0:27 looks like the Bard finally rolled a high enough Charisma check to get the Paladin

  • @andrewpenn1145
    @andrewpenn1145 5 лет назад +87

    Well, that just sounds like Dr. Stone with extra steps.

    • @PaperiLiidokki
      @PaperiLiidokki 5 лет назад

      Nice! Well played sir well played indeed

    • @krvys7226
      @krvys7226 5 лет назад +5

      It's not extra steps. While senku shows his work, he still skips some of those steps.
      But yes, it's very much Dr. Stone

    • @nonamemage6599
      @nonamemage6599 5 лет назад

      Pretty much

  • @generalbacon7476
    @generalbacon7476 5 лет назад +19

    That's some brave words from someone with in fireball cannon range

  • @Draco_WarriorEX
    @Draco_WarriorEX 4 месяца назад +1

    lmao,
    "alchemist can help you grow closer to your pets", and that picture. Perfect.

  • @trevorroscoe2245
    @trevorroscoe2245 5 лет назад +32

    I literally just rewatched some of your other DND videos, dreaming of when it comes back

  • @ivyengelharte8821
    @ivyengelharte8821 5 лет назад +212

    "Im going to be dropping the crap guide series"
    Top 10 lies of all time

  • @simplylaurajane
    @simplylaurajane 5 лет назад +55

    "Can help you grow closer with your pets"
    That was unnecessary and uncalled for, sir.

  • @PieBoy4242
    @PieBoy4242 5 лет назад +40

    1:38 OMG IT'S LOG! THE BEST TRUE CHAOTIC GOOD CHARACTER!

  • @theimpossiblethespian6974
    @theimpossiblethespian6974 5 лет назад +7

    Even those these were crap guides, they really did help me understand a bit more about the classes and figure out which one is probably best for me instead of reading through a long overly detailed book or website and search for about an hour before finding the thing I was trying to understand or was curious about. And I had a lot of laughs while watching.
    So thank you so much for taking the time to make this a thing, and a great thing! I’m very glad I found your channel through this series! Can’t wait to see more of the other cool things you do!

  • @RobSny94
    @RobSny94 4 года назад +15

    XD "Oh boy, a +2 dagger" While amongst a horde of items lmao

  • @ThisManIsBored87
    @ThisManIsBored87 5 лет назад +118

    Tiny Box Tim, that’s all I will say.