My 3 EASY TRICKS To Make First Dates Less AWKWARD | Matthew Hussey
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- Опубликовано: 1 янв 2014
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First dates are primed to be awkward.
We're going out with someone we've met for only 5 or 10 minutes usually, perhaps not at all, and so first dates have the potential to be extremely awkward if you don't set yourself up in the right way.
Here are 3 quick tips to make the whole process smoother and less awkward...
1) Touch early and often
A mistake people often make is that as they don't know someone well, and because they don't want to seem too keen, they don't get at all tactile.
The problem with this in the first part of a date is that the longer you leave it before introducing touch, the more awkward touch becomes.
For a guy, the most pain-staking, horrible scenario is the time when you've barely touched the woman you're with throughout the entire date, and at the end you want to kiss her. This makes the move of only a few centimetres feel like a mountain to climb.
Touch allows for a smoother transition through each stage.
As a woman you have the power to set the tone for this by giving him a hug or a kiss on the cheek when you first see him. This isn't desperate; it just conveys that you're someone who's warm.
2) Don't sit opposite each other
Sitting opposite one another immediately creates awkwardness. Reason being, when there's a silence, there's nowhere to turn (but facing each other).
If you're sitting adjacent to or next to someone, you can watch the world together.
Now, when there's a silence, it's not awkward, it's just a silence while you're both looking out to whatever's in front of you. When you're ready to restart the conversation, you can turn to your side and carry on.
3) Do something externally focused
I'm going to say this bluntly: The worse you are at conversation, the more external focus you need.
If you're an amazing conversationalist, you can take someone to the corner of a quiet bar and talk all night, creating an amazing connection.
If you're someone who's a little nervous, and you know that it takes a while for you to warm up, you have to do something where there's external activity. Examples could be a museum or a comedy show, or on a more subtle level it could be something as simple as taking a walk together.
Even if you were sitting on a busy park bench people-watching, this allows you to comment on things outside of yourselves, as opposed to having the sole focus on the two of you and the conversation you're having.
***
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Развлечения
hands in the bucket if u have watched this before a first date hahaha
👍👍👍
me
i will have one in a few days and i am terrified I have been watching these types of videos for a few hrs now :D
+Nasko K. Dimov how did it go????
tomorrow ahh
proof that confidence can make any shirt look good
This is stupid true. Looks like a potato rag
But it doesn't look good.
Nope his shirt still sucks.
A Good looking girl make any dress look Good
His face makes up. For it
Dude im going on a date in 2 hours i feel like im going to war 😂😂😂😂
update?! please.
@@stanleeajrdabeatles1523 she died
@@Dkbox-1 💀💀💀
same 😂💀
@@Dkbox-1 RIP
She was a good soldier, fighting brave until the very end
1. Touch early and often (the longer you wait the more awkward it gets) (being warm is not being desperate)
2. Don’t sit opposite each other (it immediately gets awkward) park bench style allows you to people watch or not be forced to look at each other during silent moments.
3.do something that involves actual external focus, especially if you aren’t a conversation expert)
Why’s it weird to sit across from each other I see that all the time
Thankyou!
@@kozzydreamz If you're looking to romance a woman it is much easier when you can initiate physical touch during the date, and this isn't really possible when sitting across from each other. If you're great at conversation you can get away with it, but many people will find that the date is more enjoyable when you are adjacent to each other
i literally made every single mistake
@@bodacious9885 🤣🤣
Don't have a date tonight, tomorrow or maybe even next month, just watching these dating videos just in case.
Lol wanna go out?
Carlos Coriano how does it feel? To be a pathetic loser?
Skeleton Clique takes one to know one.
Same same same
Skeleton Clique wtf bro, you havin a tough time?
I have been binge watching date vids my first date is in an hour! Wish me luck
yo how was it!?
***** It was awesome!!
PLEASE TELL ME ABOUT IIIT!
It was so fun we went to a fair and rode a bunch of rides!! On the way back in fell asleep on his shoulder and it was so exciting!!
ooh yayy! congrats ;)
I'm going on a zoom date do to quarantine and the first tip is "TOUCH EARLY AND OFTEN"
What a mood lmao
I find video calls with my friends awkward fuck that.
a zoom date is such a cute idea tho
@@Chris-zx1ez broo me too , i hate calling people
How did your zoom date go man?
These are really great tips for people with social anxiety.
Sam ve u hear about quick hookup if you're interested lemme know🇱🇷✈️
*Warning* STI alert
''don't sit opposite each other'' AMEN! finally someone said that, thank you. I find it so awkward
I did that with my ex almot always and it would always be awkward. Learnt from that never to sit opposite to each other
What about eating dinner?
Truth
Carrie Balberg yeah that what i was thinking
With my gf in the past I love sitting next to her, it allowed me to share food or give her kiss.
I have a Date tomorrow and im so nervous. Im quite a shy person and im so scared of arkward silence
Edit: holy shit I never realized that this had so many comments. So for everyone asking, that was my first date (I was 16 or 17). I think it went better than expected, there was no awkward silence. No we didn’t end up in a relationship.
How did the date go if you still remember lmao
Waiting fo you
Mel G same
Same
same
This was actually so sweet. He’s not a skeevy pick up artist or trying to take advantage of anxious/ socially awkward people. He’s just trying to help and giving real practical tips it’s so refreshing and comforting to see well intentioned and logical people like this
G w❤c😅😅
Me: "Hey, how are you? How was your day?"
Them: "Not bad, How was yours?"
Me: " Pretty good, I spent half the morning watching documentaries and coming up with new recipes for my job's menu."
Them: "Oh, that sounds fun."
Me: "So what do you like to do in your down time? Do you have any hobbies or interests?"
Them: " I just chilled and hung out."
Me: "Um... Well that sounds fun... What do you like to do when you chill?"
Them: "I like to hang out."
Me: "Oh that sounds fun. I like to cook and travel. I'd like to go to Spain sometime. Have you traveled much?"
Them: "No not really."
Me: "um.... Okay.... What kind of music do you like?"
Them: "I listen to everything."
Me: "Uhhh.... Okay... I like a lot of different types of music too. I'm a huge fan of Classic rock, grunge and classical music. It helps me relax since it has some meaning behind it."
Them: "Ohhh..."
Me: "Okay, fuck this."
😂😂😂 dead ass what they say to men lol
Too fuckinf accurate even when a girl hit me up first she was this way like tf u want me to do w u and ur 1 word self
Ahaaaaa!😅
Lmaoooooppooooppoppoooooooo
You had some missed opportunities there. For example, when she said that she didn't travel much, you could've said that it would be fun for the two of you to travel together and then joke about seeing the world together and all the silly mischief you might get yourselves into while doing so. Or when she said she listens of everything, you could've teased her a little and said "Liar, nobody likes everything, come on be real, what's your favorite band", and stuff like that. I know it sucks when you have a conversation partner that does not engage well, but you shouldn't take things too seriously and just use your imagination to good around with her a little. This can create a spark of attraction and make the continuation of the conversation a little easier if she lightens up a little as well. Also, you can alternatively ask her about some things that she cares about the most and then tease her about those.
Shows up to first date, extends arms out: "Hug?.."
*3 sec pause*
"No? okay.." :(
Jay Sea Haha the madman himself. Man we really have to go to some club to meet some chicks
Haha omg i really hope for you that you didnt actually ask her for a hug... women like confidence, which means not asking for permission... you wouldnt ask "sex?" So just go in for a hug whwn you meet her and maybe a kiss on the cheek if you feel like it
Wooooooow it’s Jay. Notice me senpai.
StraightUp Dude it’s obviously a joke.
Morten Stenhaug It’s just a joke obviously.
About a month ago I went out on a date with a man that I knew was shy. We went to a nice restaurant that was quiet and we sat directly across from one another. Typically I am not a quiet person but I was feeding off of him. We sat there miserable for less then 1 hour and then I went home. After listening to this I called him back up and asked him if he wanted to go for a motorcycle ride. I was shocked that he said yes. But it was perfect. I sat behind him and talked into his ear and got to rub his back and make that first physical connection to let him know I was interested and he was able to get comfortable enough talking to me without having to stare straight at me. This was brilliant! By the time we got back from our road trip and were face to face again we had 3 hours of conversation and 3 hours of things we could look back on and talk about. "Wow wasn't that waterfall amazing it reminded me of this one time..."
Great advice, keep it coming. ;)
Kim Hokenson wow lol that's interesting. I'm glad it worked out! Good thing you were a little patient! Great story to hear!
That's awesome! cheers
Kim Hokenson Are you two still together?
Sitting directly across from each other should in most cases be avoided. Especially if you're bad at small talk and/or shy.
I learned this at work. Sitting directly across from someone is confrontational and if there is a lot of tension, the conversation can easily turn into what seems more like an interrogation.
I'm more shy than most and I know it's off-putting. Once I'm done with my initial shyness, I'm more likeable. At least I hope so. :P
I think a hiking trip would be a good idea for a first date. At least in the area where I live.
Mary Hunt I second that
“If you initially see him and give him a hug” *laughs in corona*
laughs still in corona
@@rialimp laughs still in corona
@@rptvortex5780 laughs vaccinated
@@rptvortex5780 laughs in corona gone
Laughs in monkeypox
1 - Touch early and often.
2 - Don't sit opposite each other. Sit next to them.
3 - Do something that involves having external focus, particularly if you are bad at conversation. Such as a walk, hike, or just watching people on a bench.
I don't even have a date wtf am I doing here.
Thechosen one
Everybody has to start somewhere. Do not give up. :)
Preparing, I don’t have a date either haha
Preparing
never give up
just take a shot before a date !
😂
Actually helpful
Not one like 3
I just did this😂
Seems about right !
Maybe I am old fashioned, but I HATE kissing on the first or second date especially with someone you met online. A kiss is something pretty intimate and I feel like it says "I am interested in you in a sexual way, and I want to see you again". But with someone you have never met before, or someone you don't know that well, I feel like the first couple dates should be about getting to know that person as a human being, and seeing if you are even attracted to that person in the first place- ITS MORE THAN "oh hes hot". I had a REAALLLY bad first date the other day, where he was nice at first, and we did something super fun and adventurous, but then immediately was turned off because he constantly tried kissing and hugging me. It ruined it, ruined the first impression and now I refuse to see this person. Whereas a guy I dated 3 years, we went on many dates before we kissed, and as I began to become attracted to him, I think it made me more excited to see him and I anticipated that moment more.
Thelondonbadger that was deep
I understand what your view is about it but I think it really depends on the person. For me, a kiss is not wrong as it is another type of compatibility test. If I am having fun with a person and I see the moment, I will go for the kiss and "test" how well we connect too. A kiss can tell so much about the other person too, is not only about knowing the mental compatibility, is about knowing the physical one too, and imo there is nothing wrong with that. But again i suppose it depends on the person
i just watched a video on how men and women date differently. It basically said that women try to make emotional connections first whereas men try to make sexual connections first. Of course, that's generalized and everyone is different in different ways.
Omg yes!! I am watching this before a first date and honestly… I don’t want to touch someone I’ve only ever met online the first time I see them in person 👀
Totally agree!
I've done the sit beside thing a number of times before. It actually helps immensely with the touch aspect. Reaching out across the table to touch her is rather creepy, but if you're sitting beside her it can come a lot more naturally.
Imagine dating the actual Matthew Hussey. So much pressure lol
Camilla Stefanini hahahha. HE KNOWS WHAT UR THINKINGGG!
Hahaahhahaahha 😆
Camilla Stefanini he is probably a gentleman
Ask Camilla cabello
Seems like a pretty laid back dude tbh from the 2 vids i have seen.
Doubt there's much pressure at all, more like a fun and easy-going time.
The underside of his face and his voice are almost identical to Daniel Radcliff.
and somehow he's 10 billion times more attractive than Dan. I totally see the resemblance
Dam you now I hear it and can’t get rid of it
Damn I can't unsee this
That is so random and true
That’s what I thought I was just hearing this video and I was like ‚Is Harry Potter talking to me right now‘
The more you worry about the date being awkward the more it gets awkward. Never have a goal at the end of the night.. not even a kiss. Always have the mind set of just meeting a new friend and you will be 100% less nervous. When you make expectation you are worried about not meeting those expectations. If your a bad talker then go to the movies or a concert.. a place where talking isnt 100% necessary. If your naturally a nervous person on dates than dont be shy about letting the person know. Breaking that bridge can help the other make you feel better, just dont apologize a shit ton if you say stupid things. Being confident even if you fake it is key
No movie theater is open in quarantine
Don’t go to the movies on a first date. It’s even more awkward than awkward silence
This helps thanks. Will be reading this again in 3 days time. Damn dating is brutal.
Great points being made here. I still have things to work on but wanted to share this. Sometimes I find it helpful during an awkward silence to simply take a few slow deep breaths and just let the chips fall where they may. Sometimes a positive topic will just generate and keep things flowing. It also puts you in a state of relaxation which your date will notice and feed off of as well. Also, find something to compliment her on, like her shirt, jewelry, her hair style, lipstick, her speaking voice, etc. It shows that you’re noticing her appearance and can make her feel more at ease.
getting ready for my first date, oh my world im so nervous
How did it go
+Elesha Latham Haha I want to know now too :P
Yea! Keep us updated!
helpppppppp lol.
how was it ??
Hey guys.... We're over. Like a week after the date.
I like the shirt he's wearing, it looks easy to tear off
Hamza V. hahaha
Hamza V. hahahahhaha 😂😅
LOL props
😂😂😂
Lol freak
this is great! kind of knew these already but a great refreshener.
1. introduce physical contact early on so touching becomes more natural and not awkward, e.g. when you meet them give them a hug or a peck on the cheek as well as little touches here and there
2. don't sit opposite each other, if there's a silence it will be more awkward because you dont know where to look, if you sit next to each other and there's a silence you can just look at the surroundings together
3. if you're nervous or shy use the external stimuli/activity (museum, park) to create conversation
Best tips I've heard. Usually its just "Be yourself", "Don't be nervous" etc.
i asked a guy out and we had the best first date EVER! it was instant chemistry after knowing him for around 4 months but just as friends, and we talked for HOURS and time flew by. we sat side by side, and it never felt awkward. im still seeing him!
Edit: omg... how am I just seeing this 6 years later!!!!!! You guys are awesome. We broke up after 3 years.... but we were fairly compatible for most of it. Our life goals were just too different. I wanted kids and he didn’t... now I’m with the love of my life and we met on bumble!
How about now?
H C yea 😂
nigga it been 4 years lmfao
Did You, ahem, FRIENDZONE him?
now i really need to know if you er still seeing him
I'm so nervous.
Mia H
I feel you.
2h 45 mins left for me.
Rebekah Pena
How was it?
I presume not so good.
I’m scared.
B Gill im terrified, im shy and have social anxiety...
Matthew thank you so much. You helped me get out and over a abusive relationship.to being comfortable with my self. To opening my heart to moving to my first date ! Thank you again. Keep being amazing
Great video! I love the bluntness "the worse you are at conversation the more external focus you need"
jesus christ i wish i had have watched this before my date hahaha
hahahahahahaha
Lmao!!
Wtf did you kill her?
Nah was just real awkward and I did everything this guy said not to do
michaelal20 Haha, you almost killed me with this comment.
XIIILegend hahaha got a girlfriend now so we all good
So true about the 0 to 60 on a first date kiss. On a blind date once I hadn't anticipated the kiss since we hand't really had much physical contact throughout the date. Then at the end he just pulled me in and kissed me. Sounds romantic right? Well it wasn't. I was like "WTF!?" and my instant reaction was to push him off me. The date ended so awkwardly...
OMG SAME lol and I was already turning to walk away, so it took me completely by surprise! I was already over him by that point, too. And yeah it does sound more romantic than it actually is, I had a hard time explaining to my friends how awkward it was.
superanimefan
superanimefan275 I probably would’ve kissed you on the forehead shows respect and care and not as awkward 😆
Same except that I made him believe that it was going to be a second date while I was going up the bus telling him "you should have done that earlier. Next time!"
When I wasn't answering his messages, I chose to tell him that I had lost interest instead of telling him the truth, that I haven't been interested throughout the whole blind date, I was being friendly because I had previously told him by a text message he needn't ask for a kiss. In my defense, his texting skills had impressed me as well as his looks. He was way different than what he seemed and I didn't want to make things awkward by leaving.
Was I wrong?
Ouch
I do truly have to say the first thing he says about touch early is so spot on. I do that and it relieves alot of tension early
Well done to these tips.
Tried & tested steps 1 & 2. I must admit that I had to put in some discipline to go through with both. But they both set the tone for a smooth and an enjoyable date.
And guess what? Yes we agreed to meet for the 2nd date.
Just what I needed to know.
Thanks.... keep them coming
How do u even touch him? I cant even look him in the eye
Same
Just go in for a hug man as soon as you see him just say hey, and give him a hug. Don’t think about it too much just be natural about it! That should ease the tension a little!!!
@@adamterry1550 Have you hear about quick hookup if you're interested lemme know🇱🇷✈️
@@nnacamille4682 shut up
great advice except don't go for a walk by a river or in the park unless you're confident you will be safe ... remember, you don't know this date!
great point!!
Took a girl out to date today at a park now she's gone missing.
That's fine, it's still a public place, never go to his house on first date. I have seen mishaps happening
If it's a crowded place wich it's most likely gonna be, who the hell takes a date to a remote river lol?
Victoria Burmester
true he could push you in the river exactly if you don't know that person
I did this unintentionally at the first date with my first boyfriend. We immediately clicked and I always wondered why I never had that with other guys. Now thinking back of this date I realize what I did wrong the following dates after my first boyfriend.
Sitting opposite each other is also known to be seen as more formal and intimidating. I remember in my peer counselling classes we were told to sit in a sort of 45 degree angle next to each other so that it's comforting and less intimidating to the other person.
I hate first dates
Akira Bell wtf u idiot
Just pretend it's your second 👍
Don't we all and nice name 😂
Who doesn't.
Well don't hate it, its your first time knowing each other personally and so on feels comfortable with each other
If it's a restaurant and a 4 sided table, sit at 90 degrees to him. Easier to see the face and yet people watch, etc. I've done that and it's much more comfortable and makes it easier to have a conversation.
If you have chemistry the date will go 100
Times better. Nothing worse than a first date where you are like “yeaaaa no this isn’t going to work” lol.
Woah that was enlightening! I wish I had seen this video sooner!
I'll just have to try these tips next time :)
Thank you!
The fact about sitting adjacent to each other actually sounds brilliant to me, didn't even think of that. I pictured my first "date" with someone I've known for a while as us, sitting completely opposite of each other and now I can see how impractical it is in comparison to sitting next to, or adjacent to each other. I imagine it's more freeing.
Matthew just looks like a really jacked Daniel Radcliffe
cutieprincess431 He isn't even jacked, wtf.
can't unsee this now
cutieprincess431 you think this guy is "really jacked" lmao wtf have we come to....he has good confidence though
If this dude is “really jacked” im excited to hear what I am lmao
His voice even sounds like Daniel Radcliffe, the tone
You are spot on about relationship issues. I've listened to a lot of your videos and you are spot on.
First date coming fellas and she's exactly my type. Wish me luck
How'd it go?
howd it gooooo
This is such great advice! All of the awkward dates I've had were because of the mistakes you talked about. I will definitely be using these tips before my next first date.
Wow those tricks are actually game changing
I'm going to put this on all the posts I watched. I watched this video the morning of my first date and it helped a tonne. Stories about my life I was struggling to think of beforehand but funny ones came to me during the date just as I needed it. If you ever start discussing something negative, always turn it positive with a funny story. Make her laugh, never sit opposite if you can. Always get there before her. The bouncers gave me one last tip before the date arrived. I was standing in the cold lol. Don't wait outside; it makes you look desperate. Also how you feel, she feels so push away nerves by talking to those around you before she arrives and familiarising yourself with the environment. Make bets with her and lose so she can buy you a drink too. Let her repay the evening with only a drink/ice cream or whatever during the same date (she should offer). Go kino EARLY. Start with a hug, she may or may not choose a peck. Be decisive but a gentleman e.g. about when to eat or do things etc. Don't ask her where she wants to go, have things planned out. Flow in conversation. Move environments, even if it's seats in the same bar. Have things planned like a competitive or team work activity that allows you to interact. Gentle taps on her shoulder whilst laughing, briefly move your hand over hers and let go whilst your both laughing. But don't go too early on this, it has to set up a relationship for a bit. So maybe an hour in if it's going well. Move in close sitting next to her. Maybe even lean close to say something funny (make sure your mouth hygiene is impeccable. Floss, Use a tongue cleaner/scraper with tongue gel and ultradex to be sure). If it's going well you should have tonnes to talk about. Someone here said FORD family, occupation, recreation, dreams. Don't reveal too much about yourself if you want a second date. Tease her a little, to break down her wall but don't make her feel insecure. Compliment something she has done e.g. hair/worn rather than a feature of her body. Never compliment makeup; the reasons for that should be obvious. If the date is successful she'd set up the second one in some way, it might be mentioning she's doing something for charity etc. Take interest in HER. Generally if things are going well, her eyes won't wander, this is why it is so important you set up an environment you're comfortable with. The worse you are with conversation, the more external focus you need e.g. bowling to fill the gaps/tour a stately home, palace together or go on a boat ride. Point out similarities between you rather than differences. Choose DIFFERENT drinks to her on purpose after asking what she's having to show you have a mind of your own. Do something spontaneous at least once during the date like do something you're both willing to do to make you both embarrassed like dance randomly for a few seconds on your way out. It will show her CONFIDENCE and fun and exciting. You'll only have confidence if you calm your nerves that's why I'll say it again, talk to people around you and make small talk to compose yourself before the date. Finally go kino again at the end, with a hug, hopefully she'll give you the peck this time. Remember the aim of the first date is NOT to get a kiss (that's a Hollywood thing), but instead, a second date with her. Hopefully it's her that sets you up. Walk her to wherever she's going to get her ride home. Be a gentleman and put your arm round her, asking her if she doesn't mind you bringing her close if she's cold. Finally after an hour or two text to ask if she got home safely, she'll probably text saying she had a lovely time before that though. Give her a chance to do it though. Resist the urge to text her the next day before she does. Resist a further urge to text back straight away. That urge will be the hardest you've done. Respond with things that follow up on things you talked about during the date. Make her feel good about herself but always make yourself the prize and like a kitten, she'll keep interest in the ball of wool. Never boast though.
I learned so much in one night and can't believe how many years I feared this day... And it went beautifully. She set up the next date.
I just want to thank all of you in the comments section and the creator of this video who literally changed my life. Don't be put off if it goes bad, not everyone is made for each other and it is better you break off and stay friends than force something that won't work. Take it all slow. Don't be disheartened. Perfect practise makes perfect.
Good luck brothers.
you are a legend
Matthew this little tricks to deal first dates is amazing .. thank u so much for sharing, I am a kind of person who is good listener but this gestures are really amazing to know .. thank u
who the hell sits side by side at dinner ?
Me
do something about 90% so you sit as he said adjacent.
it's easier if you get like a corner table or corner both where you can angle yourself to not be directly in front of the person
ryuisonline As if the person is not anxious enough.. now I got to think about the design of the goddamn table. Can't wait!
Guywithaguitar me
This was so helpful! This is perfect for shy girls like me. 💗
I’m impressed on how much he knows and how objective his facts are
I used the touch often tip! Set my timer to beep every ten minutes then we have to touch. She loved it, worked great.
that second one is especially smart.
Boys, just came back.
It was really nice. I was like nervous in the begining, but then it was smooth conversation.
This was straight to the point. Thank you.
Dude this video is deadass helpful. Honestly wasn't even expecting that 😂
wow, that sitting next to them tip is pure genius!
I haven't been on a first date yet but from my experience talking to guys it's always easier to have something to resort to when things get awkward, such as a game. Something as simple as just asking random questions to each other, because you can figure stuff out about them, talk about it, and then if there's ever an awkward pause, then you just be like, "ok your turn".
Nah if you say your turn after you finish your talk it will feel like an interview it must be somehow smoother
Brilliant Matthew -- thank you. I have a first date this weekend and I'm anxious to try all three tips!
You provide such amazing advice! I never would have thought of what you mentioned in the video!
Hahah just got home from my best first date ever! We hugged right away and touch was so natural and Intentional the entire time. We sat next to each other at both restaurants we went to and ate korean bbq so we had to cook the food ourselves which was a great external distraction. The only thing that didnt work was the darn t shirt line from your other video! Lol 😆 may work on some other guys but this guy did not get it ....he thought it was an insult until i explained and had to confess it was a line.i think our more frank and honest conversation was more our speed but i truly appreciate all your tips and advice for us all in the dating world. ❤❤❤ Thank you!
It's my first time hearing that advise, "not sit opposite with each other", and I was like "oh so that's why!" because often times it feels more like an interview rather than a casual conversation hahaha.
Going on a hike with a guy I used to work with years ago. Conversation is great on messenger, im so looking forward to it! These are great tips in person! Thank you!!
Sitting beside each other on a date is so underrated. It makes things 10 times less intimidating and awkward, stellar tip!
Omg, I hugged him BEFORE I saw this video! We ended up talking for over five hours and we want to see each other again
GENIUS! how didn't i think of that !?
I couldn't agree more and those tips are golden for people like me who tends to get really nervous on dates
Watched this video before a date last night & I literally knocked it out the park! TOUCH EARLY & OFTEN IS KEY.
The touch thing makes sense, but personally if I JUST met someone and this was our first date I wouldn't really want them to touch me. I'm not much of a touch person in general, even with friends it takes me a long time to warm up to the hug stage of our relationship. But I can see myself being more comfortable with it if I've met them and interacted with them a few times previously.
Good advice...I hope I have the courage to use it.
Matthew I can 100% vouch for your advise on sitting next to the person on a first date that i last went on the guy was actually surprised that I chose to sit next to him and he even vocalized that he like it and no one had ever done that and it definitely made things easier in terms of communicating on a personal level, and allowed for the subtle touching that you mentioned as well. Thank you Matthew 😊😬
Bro your voice is so calming it honestly helped me get calm
OMG this helps so much thank you
I am heading out on a first date to go feed the ducks and walk along the river. Thanks for the advice!
smooth mate
how did it fo
Totally did these things on my first date last night...it was great! Touched early and often was the best advice
"a great river" that is so humble and sweet
My god, internet dating is a challenge. I live by these tips, and i didnt even know it :D
When introducing yourself as a girl I take the initiative and hug the guy when we meet, lets him know touch is okay and then it doesn't feel as awkward as a handshake...
Also breaf touches on his arm when he says something funny or when I start a conversation to get his attention. I do never sit across but thats more me feeling nervous about his eyes constantly on me while eating. But definitely something I'll keep in mind to do:)
And external activity is a great way to remove some of the nerves you get if nervous. Also a great tip for those who suffer with a lot of anxiety when you have a lot of nerves.
Only thing I would say is that the external experience could also be an activity all your examples would be awkward without conversation at some point. A walk is nice but I prefer activities of some kind to help with nerves or silent moments, like bowling.
Now a movie and dinner is my worst idea of a first date, but so common 'in the movies'. But there is such a long time gap without conversation that you are technically sitting with a stranger in silence for 2 hours before you get to know the other person, sure the movie is a good conversation starter but the movie isnt why you went on a date was it?
My ideal first date is actually some activity like bowling. Now I am very bad at it but the good thing about bowling is you move your body so there is activity which helps you lose some of the nerves by moving around without looking awkward. When you talk alot and there is a silence you move to take your shot and then resume the conversation. I spent 3 on 1 game... that is what 10 rounds each? 3 hours then you have gotten to chat you are more comfortable in each others present and a walk or dinner or just going to the pub comes more natural as you chat. Or if you don't think the evening went well you can thank him for his time and leave.
I never meet at his or my place for the first date, if we end up there at the end thats another story but by meeting somewhere more crowded you actually need to get to know the other not just jump in the sack which is such a easy place to get to when the bedroom is 1 door away... doesn't really feel like a guy is serious if he invites me home anymore after that realization, and yes I have had this experience. Also a guy asked if I had sex on the first date, even if I would, I would answer yes at that point because of the implications that he wasn't looking for more than just sex... if you have sexual interests in a potential partner preferably ask in person and definitely not before you even had your first date... somethings should be obvious...
Can you do a video about does and dont on a first date as well as does and donts when first chatting online or flirting, and huge No No topics to avoid? Very interested in the mans point of view :)
Going on my first date in two hours and I feel so confident now!! We are going to the cinema wich has a lot of external activity of course, and after we’re eating sushi! The sushi restaurant has the benches that allow us to sit next to each other. If the restaurant seems full, I’ll convince him to sit on the benches
how did it go??
Facts how did it go?
Omg I needed this so much! Thank you.
Watching this with my friend, I hope he nails it! Thank you doctor Matthew
Went on my first date last night with a guy I've liked forever, mine wasn't awkward at all bc we've known each other forever and been friends. I saw this in my sub bar for RUclips and watching it explains why it wasn't awkward thanks for helping me to understand why this one worked so much better than the others
How is it now?
@@smoothie_boi8013 she died
@@benjaminlundback8394 nah💀😭
@@smoothie_boi8013 😔
This literally helped me so much❤️
Asperger Datter 👉👌
Tosh.O Daniel Tosh bully
Great tricks, thanks mate :) Regarding the opposing seating, I totally agree and it just feels like you are at a job interview or sth similar and thus can make it much more awkward than it should be.
great, practical advice! thanks!
Won't it seem weird to sit directly next to someone on a first date though?
I completely agree. I like sitting side by side once I'm already in a relationship with you but definitely not first date!!!
+Kay Tia I am quoting a guy(NARUTO4rEaL4) who commented in this page:
"turn it into a joke, ask him if he ever feels awkward sitting across the table from dates. Maybe he'll say yeah it's awkward, that would be perfect moment to reply with, why don't we sit next to each other. And if he says no, or says you seem desperate, that makes him seem like a mean person to me. And if he is mean, why date him you know."
Brian Bay what a loser who commented that
Skeleton Clique But he's a loser with wit
As a guy I can tell you that sitting next to each other is way better in my experience. I have never had a woman not want to see my again after the first date and I always start it off sitting beside each other at a bar. Takes the pressure off awkwardly staring at someone you don't know and can't really reach to build physical connection. Sitting across from someone also makes it feel like some kind of weird interview.
This was actually really helpful. On my last date I went to an Italian place and sat directly across from the girl. Big mistake, it was really awkward. Will go bowling or something next time. I did greet her with a hug initially, I'm not sure if she liked it at the time as she gave me a very surprised look, but yeah it's probably the right move looking back. It was awkward but the first touch is going to be awkward no matter what.
Oh thank you so much, this made feel better. I already feel the butterflies in my stomach for tmwr morning ...
I love museum dates. I love talking while looking at art and historical items.
Allows for casual touch to draw attention to things
It can go as slow or quickly as you like.
I enjoy conversation and learning. I enjoy people who also like these things.
I like antique markets, outdoor or farmers markets, free music festivals etc. Inexpensive or free, interesting, has opportunities to gauge what the other person likes, plus plenty of time / places to eat or sit and chat.
I have a date in.. Four hours, so I'm basically binging all of these videos. 😂
I can just recall one of my awkward dating mistakes. You definitely hit it right Matthew!
Wow, I'm really impressed by this. Great tips that I have never thought of.
Good advice! I'm not an expert but in my experience I will add a few things. If you already know the person you are taking out I think it's fine to go to dinner and chances are you won't have any awkwardness sitting across from each other. If it is the first time you are truly getting to know someone I think doing an activity together is a good way to. Walk by the river and grab a drink at nearby bar or cafe. Maybe go bowling and share some laughs. Go to a concert that allows you to listen as well as talk to one another. Also, don't overthink things!
My first date is tomorrow i wanna ✨pass away✨
mines in an ✨hour✨
@@izzy926 update???
@マツホ。 i did cancel it and one year after im still watching this damn
@@soujoudtelli8101 you got this
This is perfect.
Amazing tips ❤️ thank you Matthew
Thanks man, tomorrow we’re gonna go see topgun. I just turned 16 and this is gonna be my first ever date. She’s so gorgeous. Wish me luck boys.
How did it go bro?
@@RBJG- probably bad i had a date and went to the movies. Never works out there