I always watch the episodes and last night watched with my partner for the first time, and he asked me what do I gain from watching TCC. And all I could say was "open mindedness". Blew me over because it is literally that. I navigate life with a different lens and I am not as close minded I was. And I love how watching the episodes sparks conversations not only with him but with my sisters as well and we share multiple perspectives. Thank you very much for The Conversation Capital. From this we can have uncomfortable conversations and have take aways from the convo and not be moody because of someone else's way of seeing things and navigating life.
This resonated with me deeply. Respect is non-negotiable for me. If I feel disrespected or taken advantage of, I will write you off and move on. I definitely relate, but for me, procrastination is less about imposter syndrome and more about my perfectionism. I get so caught up in wanting things to be perfect that I end up putting them off.
It's strange that I just watched a video of a psychiatrist, who said "50% of men who commit suicide have no history of mental illness. It comes from them reaching out to others, and being rejected". So speaking about writing people quickly, may have deeper consequences. Wow!
I was having a similar conversation with my friend regarding this yesterday. My mom told me that "ubumelwane buya cengwa. Ubuhlobo buya cengwa." You're not perfect either, but there are people who have stuck around. Give people a chance to be imperfect. On the part of mentorship, there's a part on Akeelah and the bee where Dr. Larabee tells Akeelah that there are 100 coaches around her or something and I live by that principle. It's such a phenomenonal concept.
Thank you so much for this enlightening discussion. The tendency to write people off and define them solely by their mistakes is something I’ve been guilty of too. Hearing your guests speak about how we classify others based on the end of our relationships really struck a chord with me. This has inspired me to reflect on my own actions and consider apologizing to those I may have cut off in the past. I truly appreciate the light you've shed on such an important topic.
I think most of the time we allow the negatives to outweigh the positives , on the point of writing people off over minor misunderstandings we tend to internalise and take things personal and I’ve learnt that sometimes it’s not even about you
That usually depends on your culture or how you were raised. In most African family's, you have no choice but to internalize because our elders don't allow you to talk back even when they are wrong. Many African youth's are going no contact with their parents for that very reason. Most people don't internalizes because they want to, but because they're not used being allowed to speak their mind.
Yoh these conversations are such a blessing and Ursula you are me and i really dont want to be that person but i bury people in my mind and they never hear from me again
I absolutely love how TCC is sort of creating space and showing us how possible and normal it is for us to feel the emotions, that society have always shunned upon. Shame, insecurities, loss of work/retrenchment ( has a great possibility of heightening our insecurities and even lowering our self worth ) Thanks guys, re le rata ratiiiiiiii ❤
The "Power of Networking" episode would be so helpful right now. I am a recent graduate and I am constantly looking for expos and conventions to attend, but I feel like I never really have "great"questions to ask. Ps. I absoutely love this channel.
I absolutely believe in writing people off. I ghost very quickly. I've also gotten written off and got ghosted, its part of life. The biggest thing for me that leads to ghosting and writing people off would be if a person is unkind and/or inconsiderate to me and my feelings. I am very sensitive and I tend to put people before me so when someone is inconsiderate, Its a quick and total MUST GO. I GHOST. PERIOD. And I've also tried to talk things out but just ended up being made to feel stupid or that I am crazy.
Y’all got do call ins she, cause I got a lot of things I’d like to speak of especially how your channel was brought to me by the grace of God 😊thank you guys so much for all your help ❤
I enjoyed this episode - as I have many of the others. Speaking of mentors, I have what I call my "Mental Mentors" these, for me, are women whose work lives I admire. What they advocate for, how they build their business empires, and how, while maneuvering business life, they put down "ladders" for other Sisters to climb. I read their books, follow their social media status, research their investments. There is so much, in my opinion, you can learn from a "Mental Mentor" that can help uplift you (me) and give you (me) guidance on your path of reaching your goals/dreams.
I’m also a “o mpone, o mpolaye- once bitten, twice shy”…I fee hard and often look at how better 1 could have handled the situation and have little room for giving people windows to become ‘repeat offenders’ Recently wrote off a friendship because the friend went MIA without any communication or heads up to say ‘going through A, B & C and will thus be taking some time off’- which is something they often do whenever they are gowishing… For me- failure to communicate, deny me of the opportunity to be there for them as a friend during their tough time and vice versa (cause I also went through a few challenges of my own while she was MIA)…so- that for me just made me feel like ‘what’s the point’🤷🏽♀️ And sadly- that’s how the friendship died #relational-ships are all found tricky, they require a whole lot of levelled up EQ for sure Interesting topic TCC👌🏽
The way Ursla is describing my exact personality, my God! Is she a Sagittarius? The lack of communication, the beef that lasts forever, the no inheriting any beef? That's ME 😂🤧
Love,love,love to listen to the Three Masker tears Love the 3of you conversate Oooh how I wish we learn how to conversate from You guys My virtual family
This one is for you to quit your jobs and do this. I'll ask an array of questions around the topic: - As a kid, what job did you and people around you think you'd have? - In hindsight, if your (career) life went your way, would you be happy? - What's your take on the trending career phrases "financial independent", "self-employed" and "early retirement"? Are they realistic, and how do we measure if they're true, e.g. Selling Tupperware vs Influencer vs eCommerce sales (LoveKinks) both are not formally employed but we grade their success and sense of security differently
I saw the title without having watched this and thought, 'Sometimes you reach a point where you’ve just had it with the BS you know... like sometimes we take sooo much, but everyone has a limit'. I don’t know.
Me too, I was really hoping to hear more. It was literally just touch base then they started talking about other things that aren’t related to today’s topic 😔
I’ve personally never actually believed in the formality that comes with the tittle“mentorship” I think it comes with unnecessary pressure. You can learn from your role models Organically without giving them the formal tittle “mentor”.
Wow what an eye opening conversation as always I am guilty on this 100% and should learn and change Hai I rebuke the Spirit , Ursula with going to the archives and dishing it nicely speaking to me and it's the truth Your conversation are very Informative and Given is always speaking sense I wish guys should learn from him Bonga your lovely voice is soothing Oo ooh our Ursula says it as it and opening our eyes of while laughing ❤❤
I think our view of mentorship as black people stems from not having enough/ being financially constrained and our lack mindset… promoting cultural shifts towards seeking guidance through mentorship can help foster a more positive attitude towards seeking guidance. 24:26
I was about to write off a friend who almost always misses out on important celebratory milestones in my life of late, from graduation to birthdays. She's forgotten my birthday two years in a row now and makes up by apologizing later and buying gifts. Our birthdays are a month apart. Am I bugging?
It also has to do with thinking of yourself as incapable of replicating success, so it can operate along the lines of self-sabotage . Not wanting to take the time to risk failure 'cause it's either hit or miss, and you don't take full confidence in being the person who hits . . . The mind is a funny place . 😂
I'm not disagreeing with your statement . I'm juss saying that mental health rarely has concrete parameters . All these things flow into each other at some point . . .
@@captain.tell.me.hoe. That may be true. But, I have found that people who doubt their capability tend to quit instead of procrastinating. What do you think?
I always watch the episodes and last night watched with my partner for the first time, and he asked me what do I gain from watching TCC. And all I could say was "open mindedness". Blew me over because it is literally that. I navigate life with a different lens and I am not as close minded I was. And I love how watching the episodes sparks conversations not only with him but with my sisters as well and we share multiple perspectives. Thank you very much for The Conversation Capital. From this we can have uncomfortable conversations and have take aways from the convo and not be moody because of someone else's way of seeing things and navigating life.
This resonated with me deeply. Respect is non-negotiable for me. If I feel disrespected or taken advantage of, I will write you off and move on.
I definitely relate, but for me, procrastination is less about imposter syndrome and more about my perfectionism. I get so caught up in wanting things to be perfect that I end up putting them off.
It's strange that I just watched a video of a psychiatrist, who said "50% of men who commit suicide have no history of mental illness. It comes from them reaching out to others, and being rejected". So speaking about writing people quickly, may have deeper consequences. Wow!
Miss Combs I'm glad I read your comment😮
Share the title or link of that video
@@mosimanegapeclifort2180 🤭🤭 I thought I shared it yesterday already 🫣 I wonder where I sent it 😂😂 but here it is below
ruclips.net/video/B_5N_aDu3u0/видео.htmlsi=rxf-M8VLHww6B4M7
Women write dudes off, all the time. This caused by illusion of options
I was having a similar conversation with my friend regarding this yesterday. My mom told me that "ubumelwane buya cengwa. Ubuhlobo buya cengwa." You're not perfect either, but there are people who have stuck around. Give people a chance to be imperfect.
On the part of mentorship, there's a part on Akeelah and the bee where Dr. Larabee tells Akeelah that there are 100 coaches around her or something and I live by that principle. It's such a phenomenonal concept.
Thank you so much for this enlightening discussion. The tendency to write people off and define them solely by their mistakes is something I’ve been guilty of too. Hearing your guests speak about how we classify others based on the end of our relationships really struck a chord with me. This has inspired me to reflect on my own actions and consider apologizing to those I may have cut off in the past. I truly appreciate the light you've shed on such an important topic.
Ursula is so pretty ❤ 😍🙆♂️😌
Right?? I looooooove her smile! She's also playful, so it keeps her young and pretty!
I know I’m guilty of this.. A LOT. You will never hear from me again
Me tooo yoh 😩
I need to change!
People are exhausting hle😢...
I think most of the time we allow the negatives to outweigh the positives , on the point of writing people off over minor misunderstandings we tend to internalise and take things personal and I’ve learnt that sometimes it’s not even about you
That usually depends on your culture or how you were raised. In most African family's, you have no choice but to internalize because our elders don't allow you to talk back even when they are wrong.
Many African youth's are going no contact with their parents for that very reason. Most people don't internalizes because they want to, but because they're not used being allowed to speak their mind.
I enjoyed this talk, especially on writing people off over minor misunderstandings that one hit hard, I got exposed lol.
i felt it too,i need to work on myself.
Yoh these conversations are such a blessing and Ursula you are me and i really dont want to be that person but i bury people in my mind and they never hear from me again
"nna ke rata karabo moroka" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Gotta love Ursula ♥️♥️🥰🥰
I absolutely love how TCC is sort of creating space and showing us how possible and normal it is for us to feel the emotions, that society have always shunned upon. Shame, insecurities, loss of work/retrenchment ( has a great possibility of heightening our insecurities and even lowering our self worth )
Thanks guys, re le rata ratiiiiiiii ❤
The "Power of Networking" episode would be so helpful right now. I am a recent graduate and I am constantly looking for expos and conventions to attend, but I feel like I never really have "great"questions to ask. Ps. I absoutely love this channel.
I love everything about you guys. You have really mastered the " chat with friends" objective. Keep up the good work. Thank you for being authentic.
I absolutely believe in writing people off. I ghost very quickly. I've also gotten written off and got ghosted, its part of life. The biggest thing for me that leads to ghosting and writing people off would be if a person is unkind and/or inconsiderate to me and my feelings. I am very sensitive and I tend to put people before me so when someone is inconsiderate, Its a quick and total MUST GO. I GHOST. PERIOD. And I've also tried to talk things out but just ended up being made to feel stupid or that I am crazy.
I love watching your conversations, they are very informative and eye opening and to be open minded
Y’all got do call ins she, cause I got a lot of things I’d like to speak of especially how your channel was brought to me by the grace of God 😊thank you guys so much for all your help ❤
I enjoyed this episode - as I have many of the others. Speaking of mentors, I have what I call my "Mental Mentors" these, for me, are women whose work lives I admire. What they advocate for, how they build their business empires, and how, while maneuvering business life, they put down "ladders" for other Sisters to climb. I read their books, follow their social media status, research their investments. There is so much, in my opinion, you can learn from a "Mental Mentor" that can help uplift you (me) and give you (me) guidance on your path of reaching your goals/dreams.
I am one who quickly write people off in the name of protecting my peace. I don't like stress bandla 🙈
Same
I can relate... I believe people know how to act right.. And they do so for people they want to act right for
I’m also a “o mpone, o mpolaye- once bitten, twice shy”…I fee hard and often look at how better 1 could have handled the situation and have little room for giving people windows to become ‘repeat offenders’
Recently wrote off a friendship because the friend went MIA without any communication or heads up to say ‘going through A, B & C and will thus be taking some time off’- which is something they often do whenever they are gowishing…
For me- failure to communicate, deny me of the opportunity to be there for them as a friend during their tough time and vice versa (cause I also went through a few challenges of my own while she was MIA)…so- that for me just made me feel like ‘what’s the point’🤷🏽♀️
And sadly- that’s how the friendship died
#relational-ships are all found tricky, they require a whole lot of levelled up EQ for sure
Interesting topic TCC👌🏽
The way Ursla is describing my exact personality, my God! Is she a Sagittarius?
The lack of communication, the beef that lasts forever, the no inheriting any beef?
That's ME 😂🤧
I haven't watched BUT the Subject njeee 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 I am glad we are finally such Conversations
Thank you, TCC I really enjoyed this episode. Always a pleasure to be here.
The 3 of you are such a joy to listen to/watch.
I really enjoyed the reflections ❤️🤌🏽🔥
Love,love,love to listen to the Three Masker tears
Love the 3of you conversate Oooh how I wish we learn how to conversate from You guys My virtual family
I'm literally binging these episodes. I am enjoying you guys.
Light bulb 💡 moments all round. Thank you so much.
Let me go and study immediately... voice of reason got me
This one is for you to quit your jobs and do this.
I'll ask an array of questions around the topic:
- As a kid, what job did you and people around you think you'd have?
- In hindsight, if your (career) life went your way, would you be happy?
- What's your take on the trending career phrases "financial independent", "self-employed" and "early retirement"? Are they realistic, and how do we measure if they're true, e.g. Selling Tupperware vs Influencer vs eCommerce sales (LoveKinks) both are not formally employed but we grade their success and sense of security differently
I saw the title without having watched this and thought, 'Sometimes you reach a point where you’ve just had it with the BS you know... like sometimes we take sooo much, but everyone has a limit'. I don’t know.
Hi guys I really like the podcast. As for the topic, I resonated and I was hoping to hear more.
Me too, I was really hoping to hear more. It was literally just touch base then they started talking about other things that aren’t related to today’s topic 😔
So much food for thought in this podcast. Thanks team ❤.
I can watch you all day Ursula,switching into Tswana gone is a Wow❤
Great show Mariana. Bring it on.
Wow...mindful awareness mindset
Beautiful episode guys 😊
Thnk you guys for a great topic, we learning❤
Ursula is doing her make-up so seamlessly,i love it.
I’ve personally never actually believed in the formality that comes with the tittle“mentorship” I think it comes with unnecessary pressure. You can learn from your role models
Organically without giving them the formal tittle “mentor”.
Wow what an eye opening conversation as always I am guilty on this 100% and should learn and change Hai I rebuke the Spirit , Ursula with going to the archives and dishing it nicely speaking to me and it's the truth
Your conversation are very Informative and Given is always speaking sense I wish guys should learn from him
Bonga your lovely voice is soothing
Oo ooh our Ursula says it as it and opening our eyes of while laughing ❤❤
This is me; I will write you off. I am very aware of it and working on it
I love GRWM episodes❤.
Ursula loves Bonga, i really love their chemistry even though i dont get to see Bonga
When Ursh says 'hmmmmmm" cracks me up all the time 😂😂❤
Nam I'm a bridge burner bathong and I move on quickly
O mpone o mpolaye le motho o😂😂
Can't wait for the episode ya Therapy❤
I think our view of mentorship as black people stems from not having enough/ being financially constrained and our lack mindset… promoting cultural shifts towards seeking guidance through mentorship can help foster a more positive attitude towards seeking guidance. 24:26
This show calms my nerves ❤
Lovely episode as always ❤🙌🙌
I was about to write off a friend who almost always misses out on important celebratory milestones in my life of late, from graduation to birthdays. She's forgotten my birthday two years in a row now and makes up by apologizing later and buying gifts. Our birthdays are a month apart. Am I bugging?
Communicate
No, sorry, but this person is not your friend. There's missing one day, which is understandable, but multiple?? Hmmmm
@@kitsontuli2713exactly !!!!! Also knowing how important your birthday is I should be prioritising your day.
"secrecy yakhe" ikhona i secrecy in marriage?
what I needed to hear
😂😂😂nna I beef to a point of me not knowing what it is that you did anymore.... but I hate it for myself but I do not know how to stop this 😔
Can you guys please get on spotify 😢
Please, please please, quit your 9-5s 🤣🥰
Lena, my favourite ❤
Yohhh! Modimo wa kgotso.
😂😂 Ursula is me and I am Ursula in this episode. I’ll go to archives and dish it out nicely.
I love you guys
❤❤❤
I think Ursula missed it a bit. Procrastination is more to do with perfectionism, than it does with imposter syndrome
It also has to do with thinking of yourself as incapable of replicating success, so it can operate along the lines of self-sabotage . Not wanting to take the time to risk failure 'cause it's either hit or miss, and you don't take full confidence in being the person who hits . . . The mind is a funny place . 😂
I'm not disagreeing with your statement . I'm juss saying that mental health rarely has concrete parameters . All these things flow into each other at some point . . .
@@captain.tell.me.hoe. That may be true. But, I have found that people who doubt their capability tend to quit instead of procrastinating. What do you think?
🙌🏽✨
I
❤❤