American Pleasure Club’s (formerly known as Teen Suicide) new album ‘A Whole Fucking Lifetime of This’ is out 2/16, listen to “this is heaven & id die for it” right here: ruclips.net/video/MtHifoG2kgM/видео.html
i like the ending, it’s like somebody jamming on their guitar listening to something, and it hit too close to home so they had to stop and turn it off before it registered
honestly that is such a good way to see it, the sudden guitar stop and then kind of frantically going for the stop record button because it hits way too hard and you can't continue is such a mood
Oh dear this is exactly the vibe of Your closest friend, the one you thought would have stayed out of all the people that have left you, is drifting away too
I dedicated this song for my boyfriend , 4 days ago his best friend told me , he had ended his life . I always listen to this band , it reminds me of him and how I lost him .
i’m so sorry you have to go through that. I wish you the best in life. just know that if anyone in this world loves you, it’s me. have a great day/night
I’m really sorry for your loss, I’ve never had to go through that so I’m not sure how it feels but I’m sure it feels absolutely awful. I wish you happiness soon. ⭐️
lucky you. i'm listening to this song right now feeling hopeless and broken over a girl i liked for half my life only to see her today with someone else. i hope i may listen to this song again in the future with feelings of enjoyment rather than these miserable thoughts and feelings, when they're all gone.
this reminds me of when i was younger how when i went to bed i’d lay down and stare at the ceiling and i felt like i could feel the earth spinning, i did that till i fell asleep. sometimes i still have that feeling. :)
i think its the order of the notes played, thats for me anyways. I feel like I have heard this before a LONG LONG time ago, not only by the sound of the notes, but the pattern as well
“...and follow the path you were destined to have. you know, oftentimes we don't slow down to think about the grudges, resentments, and anger that we hold on to every day, in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds. whether you're aware of it or not, i am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself, that there is a way that-“
@@iwannabeawitch the artist's tumblr said: lol this is from a youtube vlog with like 20 views that someone thought would be a good like self help depression thing or something it has no significance but the fun of appropriating insignificant pieces of digital trash is people attach their own meanings to them & give them their own signifiers so that’s cool
I wanna be haunted I wanna be loved I want a lot of friends and A lot of drugs I wanna be haunted I won’t leave my bed I won’t go crazy and I won’t get sad So haunt me haunt me haunt me ooo
I'm so proud of myself for beating depression and coming out alive. I'm also proud of the people who passed away, you had the courage to, you are brave. don't feel bad now, past is past and you must enjoy what life, or whatever you are experiencing after. congrats, you're strong pal :) stay yourself and don't change, unless it's to become a better self :D
Reminds me of my freshman year of high school. Got to meet the band in Connecticut. Bought a shirt lost it grown so much since then yeah this music is awesome helped me with stuff
This reminds me of the years going by from 13 to 16 and how i quickly changed When i was 13 i was a very energetic oblivious child who wanted to be everyone friend i was quite immature and life was fun When i was 14 i started to shift i only started going outside like once a week but i was still mostly happy It was somewhere in those years where i was diagnosed At 15 i didnt go out didnt talk didnt do anything i couldnt cry anymore. Couldnt bring myself to do anything At 16 it remained the same but it got moderately worst
A long rabbit hole of obscure internet occurrences and one trip to the BaphometKun channel and now I’m here just completely here. The way they used the song made it sound so joyous I was so very wrong, but now I’m here and so are you other viewers. It feels nice for once to have found something like this as horrid as it might sound it’s just the type of noise I need right now.
this song reminds me of highschool when friends and i went to shows and feels like the dullness i had the back of my head and i had this song on repeat so many times in the 10th grade
i was going through a hard time during november 2020 - march 2021 and this was the song that made me cry when i was feeling numb. glad it’s over i love this song
@@Opiumdrainer hey, I know im just a random stranger on the internet but please, dont end it. I know this sounds cringe but there's still a lot to live for, even if its not here right now. and I hope things can get better for you. You deserve a happy life
The blissful moments I have had in my childhood were never really long lasting but they were something. Playing at school by myself, reading my favorite books under dark covers with nothing but a flashlight, staying up late watching AntVenom with my sister, being with my best friend. It’s those moments I enjoy. It’s those moments I miss. My childhood wasn’t the best, but those are the things I would never wish to change.
I dont know why but this song just makes me feel some sort of way.... It feels like the depressing silence after the storm. Kind of like remembering the trauma you've experienced after its all over and knowing that you can relax but never forgetting everything you've seen. Or like theres a ghost in your house and you're terrified and you finally speak to it and find out its just a child who died thats just working on moving on.
That is exactly how I feel when I see things like that. Whenever I walk past an abandoned building, or some interesting looking ones, I just wonder what the residents of that place were like and how the building got to that state. It's so amazing to see someone else with a similar view.
I find this song so, oddly comforting. Like a friend that isn’t good at comforting others just trying their best you make you feel better. It sounds so bitter sweet but has a “It will get better, trust me” vibe to it. Listening to this makes me think of my regrets and disappointments, but the it shows my all my triumphs and good things I have done with a reassuring “Hang in there.” That’s just me though.
this song is bittersweet for me because I listened to it on repeat during the worst months of my life. made me hate it but also find comfort in it at the same time
this song, dude. I don't know what it is, but it's making me feel so bittersweet. like I feel like, I can accept myself for who I am.. it's a great feeling
Yo this is like the super sad version of Grow by Conan Gray if you haven’t listened to that do it like right now because that shit is inspirational make sure you watch the music video cuz whoo boy
RIP to the things I'll never get to relive: - Running barefoot of the sidewalk even though it's littered with pine needles and rocks - Drinking water straight from the hose - Accidentally eating sand at the beach whenever you wipe your lips - Snowball fights - Sledding - Snow angels - Building snowmen - And running my hands under warm water after they freeze up - Those naps I would take after coming home from school - Being able to wake up early in the morning before my family and spending that time watching tv - Chasing after the ice cream man - Pillow forts - Sleepovers - Hide 'n Seek - Tag - Hiding under the blanket with my favorite stuffed animal during storms - Going places with mom and dad and getting spoiled - Innocence and not understanding world problems - Time with mom and dad pre-divorce - The idea that we could never die young
i don't know how much you need to hear this but you matter and there's always someone there for you and if you think there isn't I am here and I love you whoever you are
Imagine listening to this at graduation. You look at everyone throwing their caps and cheering. But for you it seems like time stoped but it went so fast at the same time. You remember making your first friend, your first favorite teacher, your first time breaking down because of the overwhelming amount of work and the first crush you had. You don’t want to leave that all behind, but you have too. You have to go to college, move, get married and have kids. So you just accept it and move on. I don’t want to move on. I’m still a kid at heart and I’m scared of growing up. I’m scared.
I've been there, and I can tell you this: You don't have to. You learn how to live alone, go to work, pay your bills, but we're all still kids at heart. You forget some people, you keep some at heart, and you met a lot of new ones. You'll get there and you won't even notice!
The fact is… I’ve been thinking of this when I was a kid in general. And still am about forgetting myself. Like… ending up so stressed and lost that I will lose that light and dreams my childhood self had. :((
Reminds me of my positive memories of being a toddler. Makes me cry a bit on how time goes fast. Even tho it’s been 12 years, it still feels like it was yesterday that I was on the couch waiting for mama to bring me a baby bottle of milk. Those were the days. I still kinda cry thinking of it, but from listening to this song I was able to calm down knowing that I have a future ahead of me, with my lover and supporting friends and family.
I swear this song always gets to me. It will never fail to make me cry because I listened to this so much after my dad had passed away and it only gives me memories of how much my heart hurt at the time
i want this to play while i dangle my legs off a bridge, middle of the night, just enjoying the cool breeze. maybe even blasting this in my car, all the windows rolled down and speeding down an abandoned street.
This song helped me a lot. I was at a low point when I found out she was gone and this comforted me so much. Whenever I listen to this I think of her and how good friends we were. I wonder what she’s doing now.
This song puts me back right back into the anorexic mind I had back in my middle teens, where you kinda watch everything happen but never feel really there, and even after years since I can’t remember a thing. It’s like you lose years of your life to a blurry headache, and when you want to reconnect with people, they’re not the same and you haven’t grown up with them. There’s no memory of fond memories, and it all seems like a distorted mess. That’s the situation this song emulates for me
I don't advise dwelling too much in the past. It can be blurry, it can be sad, or put a smile on your face, but it frequently robs you of your present. Be mindful, and remember to do this every once in a while. Take some time to turn off the music, turn off your thoughts. Listen and observe the things happening near you. If you don't do it now, you've lost your chance.
You know those random memories you have without rhyme or reason? Like 1 specific day or moment that really has no value but you remember it anyway? When I was about 6 my mom and I came back from shopping, and the sun was setting by the time we were done packing. I lived in the middle of nowhere with fields surrounding us. I remember climbing to the top of our playset(a good 15-20ft) and watching the sunset. I remember how cold it was out, the orange and yellow hues that I've failed to recreate in my art, and the calling of my mom to come inside. This song somehow reminds me of that moment, and I dont think I'll ever know why. Maybe it's that feeling of never being able to go back to that moment of pure innocence. The happiness and calm I felt was something unexplainable. I didn't know much about the world, about the future. I didn't have any worries or stress, I was only thinking of the sunset. It's the urge to go back to that. That sense of calm without fear of something going wrong. Songs like these bring back moments like that, and its refreshing. So to whomever reads this; have a good day/night, eat a snack you deserve it, and dont forget to drink water
I see people sharing stuff from their childhood and that made me think how i almost completely forgot about mine - about all the gardening with my grandmother, all the old friends, dumb stories- and it's all because I've been thinking about how the last 4 years I've been dealing with depression. It started out slow and each year it would get worse. This year it went as far as crippling - i couldn't do anything at all but stay in bed. I wouldn't take care of myself, wouldn't eat, hydrate or get up. I'd either sleep or lay in bed staring at the wall. I'm trying to get out of it - it's really hard but i like to think I'm making a little bit of progress everyday. I hope everyone else who's having a hard time right now are making some progress towards feeling better too.
I lost almost everyone else, but I don’t want to loose her too. She’s my closest friend. We are fine and not drifting apart but I still have that fear.
My cousins had a house that i’ll never forget. We would all sit in a little room upstairs and talk and play. I remember me and my cousin taking blankets and pillows and sitting behind a big desk, or sitting in the bathroom playing on our tablets. They moved out a long time ago and i will forever miss that house. So many more unforgettable memories were made there. Im honestly heartbroken all those times will never be made again. That house is now owned by somebody else, but I still get to pass by it. I didn’t live in it, but it felt like I did. Half of my childhood was there.
Often times we don't slow down to thing about the grudges, resetments, and anger that we hold onto everyday, in our body, in our heart, and in our mind.
We will find peace. this song will be the reminder that it is possible to listen to this when your sad, but one day happy. This song is something I listen to because I love it. It does make me sad though. Makes my heart feel sour, but my ears feel like heaven. It’s worth it. But one day both will feel like heaven, because one day I’ll truly be happy.
i dont know if youll ever find this, but part of me hopes you do. ive loved you for the past three years, but ive just been too afraid to tell you. im happy that youve found someone else who makes you complete, but as happy as i am being your friend, the pain i get in my chest every day is making it harder and harder. its all my fault. youre my everything and you dont even know it
this is for one person out there, you know you haunt my every day and night when I sleep you're all I dream about and even though you hurt me so much without even trying I love you so much and I miss you but I know Im bad for you no matter how much anyone has told me Im complete cancer, besides there's a much better person in your life that I cannot even possibly dream about topping, hes good for you he mostly does good things stay with him, this is a message that will never reach you but I just want you to know Im so sorry that im such a depressed person and in all 21 of my miserable years my short time with you was the only time I wasnt drowning in depression. its been nice knowing you, goodbye forever probably
I know it’s probably too personal, but... My only grandpa I’ve ever known passed away about 2 months ago, it was very sudden. If I’m being honest, it was too sudden... especially for my grandma. She’s been through so much, so many of her loved ones passing away. And him going away is so hard for her. How she has to endure so much heartbreak... I just hope that she’ll find peace one day. I hope grandpa will too. To anyone who has gone through the same, just know they’re never really gone. You’ll always love them, and they’ll always love you. ❤️
My brother was so kind to me. Always invented the funniest games to play, always nice, laughing... He never got angry at me. I was a crappy child, always screaming and selfish, and he was like an angel. I just wish I could go back to those time when we were kids...i just wish this time I could appreciate his presence more.... He's an adult now. He has his own life. I can never go back to those times. I lost him. I lost myself. I just...wanna go back with you....
I had friends, a lot. Decisions I made and they made. Time passes, distance lengthens. I miss you. I would do things differently knowing what I know now. It’s been years since I’ve seen you both. I remember all of us in a positive manner. I hope you can say the same.
You know, often times we don’t sit down to think about the grudges, resentment, and anger that we hold on to everywhere in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds. Whether you’re aware of it or not, I am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself.
I have so many questions. Nostalgia and other inexpressible feelings are over me all the time. This song takes me to all liminal spaces I've been since kid, and that makes wonder what has happened in those places. It evokes kind of an impotence on me, because I don't want them to be forgotten. I know that the eight year old child, that I once was, stills alive somewhere in liminality. I want to express so many things that cant be expressed with words, we the humans are certainly complex but beautiful.
this song reminds me of the nights I’d spend on my ds late at night. not worrying about anxious thoughts, not being scared of abandonment, only worrying about my nintendogs and what place id get in Mario kart. I miss it
Pov:you commit suicide in ur room and you have to stay there all eternity watching ur family members walk in, reminisce, talk to you through notes that you can’t respond to on repeat until their eventual death Or You do respond to the notes and due to them being Christian they think the devil is writing them and they ask a priest to bless the room and soon to find out ur now nonexistent or i guess set free into the world. I know this sounds “edgy” but im not meaning it that way i just think the concept is kinda heart felt
[Verse] 0:36 I wanna be haunted I wanna be loved I want a lot of friends and A lot of drugs 0:56 I wanna be haunted I won't leave my bed I won't go crazy, and I I won't get sad [Chorus] 1:13 So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh [Outro] And follow the path you were destined to have You know, oftentimes we don't slow down to think about the grudges, resentments, and anger that we hold on to every day, in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds Whether you're aware of it or not, I am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself, that there is a way that-
this is the second time I've discovered this songs and it's definitely been a while.. just leaving a comment here for whenever I happen upon this song in the future :)
This makes me long for one of those teenage lives advertised in 90s movies and TV shows, like Skins or Kids (1995). Not just drugs, sex and alcohol, but also skate, late night partying and hanging out with your friends at dusk in a shady place. I know it's not healthy, and I guess I'm glad I grew up away from all that... but TV made it seem so chill that I can't help but wonder.
I wonder how the people living in my old houses are doing. I hope they’re all okay. I hope that they find the old stuff that was left behind and maybe wonder if the people who left it are okay too
This song makes me feel so nostalgic for my friends. A year and a half or so ago, when the pandemic first properly started I went through one of the worst times mentally I've ever experienced. I cut off all of my friends, not because I didn't like them, that wasn't the reason at all. Talking became too overwhelming, I hated this person I was becoming and didn't want to drag them down with me, even though all they wanted was to help me. Cut to now, I'm no longer depressed but I have zero friends. The habit of cutting everyone I talk to off has manifested itself in me so much to the point where I can't physically make any friends. I miss being able to have someone to talk to, to go out and see. I resent myself for what I did now, and wish it could've been different. I want to text them out of nowhere one day and rekindle everything but I'm so scared as to what their reaction would be. They have every right to hate me for disappearing, and although I know, this nothing could possibly prepare me for the confirmation that they do indeed hate me. Things are different now anyway, they've changed. I've changed. But I still miss them so damn much.
Just try and get them all together and just explain why you had a hard time. If u trust your friends with all your heart, tell them why you couldn’t talk to them. It’s ok to try. Please be safe💕💕
I feel some type of way while listening to this song. Sometimes i think about how ungrateful im to my parents and how im gonna loose them some day, and i dont see the amount of love they offer me and how i offend them cuz if my stupid thoughts. Im not ready to lose em :(
I can’t believe I am living. I am barely aware that time is going and I can’t progress change. I have failed so much in life i am starting to believe that succes isn’t for me. I try and i try and i keep adjusting my ways of going trough life to make progress but all it has lead to is a deep hole of self hatred and lack of will go live. I don’t know if i want to leave the earth or be someone else, it’s all a big blur of emptiness and I don’t know what is coming of where i will be. I am 21 but i still feel 16 while also able to be very mature. I hope i can one day come back to this comment and mark this me as history.
Idk why it just feels..... Nice. All the old memories I've spent with my friends, family, and how i was so sweet and cheerful back then. But this is the present now, we can't go back in time so.... I guess we'll just deal with it :)
I wish we could have fixed what we had. I wish I had tried harder. I wish I hadn't been so sensitive. I wish you'd cared more. I hope you love them. I hope you're happy.
It each of Knights from Shovel knight had a song, this would be specter knights because he is a severely depressed ghost who wants nothing but his past back, his friend Luan and Reize, the great adventures he had. Now he is stuck in the Lich Yard forever to be it’s Gaurdian, living a lonely life of recluse and self loathing for ruining himself. Maybe someday, this old flying corpse will get to rest, but until then, only pain ensues.
I remember I had an ant colony in my old back garden. I used to name the ants normal human names like “Steve, Sarah, etc” then one day my dad destroyed the colony :( I remember in school when it was summer me and my friends would put holes in the caps of our plastic water bottles and have a water fight. We would be soaking wet but it was one of the funnest things ever. I remember me and my friends got chased by dogs and when we hopped over a fence my friends shoe got stolen by one of the dogs. I remember when in school we were reading the iron giant book, and the teacher played a short animated video of the opening of the book. The short video scared me and I couldn’t sleep for a month
![BLACK BAG - Official Trailer [HD] - Only in Theaters March 14](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Du0Xp8WX_7I/mqdefault.jpg)
American Pleasure Club’s (formerly known as Teen Suicide) new album ‘A Whole Fucking Lifetime of This’ is out 2/16, listen to “this is heaven & id die for it” right here: ruclips.net/video/MtHifoG2kgM/видео.html
Run For Cover Records im glad to hear they changed their band name i like this one much better
@@zopilote_4000 *Teen Suicide*
@@zopilote_4000 no not at all
i like the ending, it’s like somebody jamming on their guitar listening to something, and it hit too close to home so they had to stop and turn it off before it registered
i love this interpretation
for years of listening to teen suicide, this had always been my interpretation since the very beginning
okay that made me actually sad.
honestly that is such a good way to see it, the sudden guitar stop and then kind of frantically going for the stop record button because it hits way too hard and you can't continue is such a mood
I used to leave vitamin gummies next to the screen door of my old childhood house to attract trails of ants. I wonder who lives in that house now.
I love how this comment somehow manages to actually encompass the mood this song gives me, like this comment just fits the song sooo well. tf
I do
yourvirtualdad epic
you can always go back and see
the ants do now obviously
Oh dear this is exactly the vibe of
Your closest friend, the one you thought would have stayed out of all the people that have left you, is drifting away too
Feeling's mutual.
Oh no
you did not have to remind me
aaaaaaah, bro
Dang it, that’s actually happening
Damn that hits too close to home
I dedicated this song for my boyfriend , 4 days ago his best friend told me , he had ended his life . I always listen to this band , it reminds me of him and how I lost him .
i’m so sorry you have to go through that. I wish you the best in life. just know that if anyone in this world loves you, it’s me. have a great day/night
*May His Soul Rest In Heaven....*
Im so sorry for your loss I hope you know that he is watching over you and that he will always be in your heart
stay safe out there
F
I’m really sorry for your loss, I’ve never had to go through that so I’m not sure how it feels but I’m sure it feels absolutely awful. I wish you happiness soon. ⭐️
I remember I use to listen to this feeling hopeless…This song hurt like a bittersweet ache. But now I can enjoy it because I know its over :)
same:)
true
Life is over :)
I always imagine songs like this as a happy ending
lucky you. i'm listening to this song right now feeling hopeless and broken over a girl i liked for half my life only to see her today with someone else.
i hope i may listen to this song again in the future with feelings of enjoyment rather than these miserable thoughts and feelings, when they're all gone.
this reminds me of when i was younger how when i went to bed i’d lay down and stare at the ceiling and i felt like i could feel the earth spinning, i did that till i fell asleep. sometimes i still have that feeling. :)
:)
:)
Aw :)
:)
Why does this make me feel so nostalgic
i think its the order of the notes played, thats for me anyways. I feel like I have heard this before a LONG LONG time ago, not only by the sound of the notes, but the pattern as well
Ikr…I just can’t to seem on what the nostalgia is about and why…
probably how the notes sound like they were recorded using old, worn out equipment
this song physically slaps my heart
Plot twist: You’re not hearing drums in the song it’s actually your heart pounding
@@getskrunked thats more like a plot twist that a fun fact
@@mrbreastgaming3426 ok
“...and follow the path you were destined to have. you know, oftentimes we don't slow down to think about the grudges, resentments, and anger that we hold on to every day, in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds. whether you're aware of it or not, i am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself, that there is a way that-“
Do you know where i can find the original thing? :(
@@iwannabeawitch the artist's tumblr said:
lol this is from a youtube vlog with like 20 views that someone thought would be a good like self help depression thing or something
it has no significance but the fun of appropriating insignificant pieces of digital trash is people attach their own meanings to them & give them their own signifiers so that’s cool
@@bituin5908 it doesn’t say, so i don’t know. sorry!
.
"thats me :)"
"stay away :("
"This used to be my room"
"I miss my toys
*DEPRESSION 100*
best channel
Baphokun led you here too I see
@@motifity3416 yes thy father
Thank you, RUclips recommended!
I wanna be haunted
I wanna be loved
I want a lot of friends and
A lot of drugs
I wanna be haunted
I won’t leave my bed
I won’t go crazy and
I won’t get sad
So haunt me haunt me haunt me ooo
ooo
OoOoOoO
Pog
Thanks
I'm so proud of myself for beating depression and coming out alive.
I'm also proud of the people who passed away, you had the courage to, you are brave.
don't feel bad now, past is past and you must enjoy what life, or whatever you are experiencing after.
congrats, you're strong pal :)
stay yourself and don't change, unless it's to become a better self :D
hello fellow long line
@@user-ff4pi9dc3g lol
I’m proud of you! I love you! I love you all dealing with difficult things in life. I am so proud of you all
Fake deep
@@Caleb-fv5fp fAkE dEeP
Reminds me of my freshman year of high school. Got to meet the band in Connecticut. Bought a shirt lost it grown so much since then yeah this music is awesome helped me with stuff
ur comments at 69 likes so I'm not gonna like im sorry bro
@@chasedobson5956 it's ok you can like now
This reminds me of the years going by from 13 to 16 and how i quickly changed
When i was 13 i was a very energetic oblivious child who wanted to be everyone friend i was quite immature and life was fun
When i was 14 i started to shift i only started going outside like once a week but i was still mostly happy
It was somewhere in those years where i was diagnosed
At 15 i didnt go out didnt talk didnt do anything i couldnt cry anymore. Couldnt bring myself to do anything
At 16 it remained the same but it got moderately worst
Stay strong, we will all get through this.
Front facing troll face
how are things now mate?
how are things now mate?
I smoked a lot of weed and lost alot
i would share a cute tidbit about my childhood but my memory is so shit i forgot everything about it
damn i feel u
alexa play everywhere at the end of time
sounds like something a synth would say
that sucks, could it be that you had traumas?
@@user-ir7qs3oe9e no
A long rabbit hole of obscure internet occurrences and one trip to the BaphometKun channel and now I’m here just completely here. The way they used the song made it sound so joyous I was so very wrong, but now I’m here and so are you other viewers. It feels nice for once to have found something like this as horrid as it might sound it’s just the type of noise I need right now.
Ah i see BaphometKun fan here too
ah I see you re a man of culture as well
@@ismailferjani5243 yes
Baphomet Kun has some artistic talents for making those videos
I think they're how most of us got here lmao
@@thestargazer679 I suppose it is and I think I’ll hold on to BaphometKun and this song
this song reminds me of highschool when friends and i went to shows and feels like the dullness i had the back of my head and i had this song on repeat so many times in the 10th grade
i was going through a hard time during november 2020 - march 2021 and this was the song that made me cry when i was feeling numb. glad it’s over i love this song
Proud of you
Sadly I think my uphill battle will end in suicide
@@Opiumdrainer hey, I know im just a random stranger on the internet but please, dont end it. I know this sounds cringe but there's still a lot to live for, even if its not here right now. and I hope things can get better for you. You deserve a happy life
The blissful moments I have had in my childhood were never really long lasting but they were something. Playing at school by myself, reading my favorite books under dark covers with nothing but a flashlight, staying up late watching AntVenom with my sister, being with my best friend. It’s those moments I enjoy. It’s those moments I miss. My childhood wasn’t the best, but those are the things I would never wish to change.
feels like riding in the car home after a really fun day.. cherishing the fun times but also being relieved that you get to get some good rest :]
I dont know why but this song just makes me feel some sort of way.... It feels like the depressing silence after the storm. Kind of like remembering the trauma you've experienced after its all over and knowing that you can relax but never forgetting everything you've seen. Or like theres a ghost in your house and you're terrified and you finally speak to it and find out its just a child who died thats just working on moving on.
In my hometown...theres this old house that's just falling apart. I wonder who used to live there...what their life was like.
it happed to me the old house is fall apart and now its nothing
That is exactly how I feel when I see things like that. Whenever I walk past an abandoned building, or some interesting looking ones, I just wonder what the residents of that place were like and how the building got to that state. It's so amazing to see someone else with a similar view.
Some things just cant be repaired...
Insanity...
Pessimism...
Depression...
But at least things like this make the damage a little less...
I find this song so, oddly comforting.
Like a friend that isn’t good at comforting others just trying their best you make you feel better.
It sounds so bitter sweet but has a “It will get better, trust me” vibe to it.
Listening to this makes me think of my regrets and disappointments, but the it shows my all my triumphs and good things I have done with a reassuring “Hang in there.”
That’s just me though.
this song is bittersweet for me because I listened to it on repeat during the worst months of my life. made me hate it but also find comfort in it at the same time
This is the most real sad RUclips comment I’ve ever seen. Everybody is being serious. Telling real stories about themselves. Thanks
this song, dude. I don't know what it is, but it's making me feel so bittersweet. like I feel like, I can accept myself for who I am.. it's a great feeling
I feel the same
Yo this is like the super sad version of Grow by Conan Gray if you haven’t listened to that do it like right now because that shit is inspirational make sure you watch the music video cuz whoo boy
@☆ drawsarс ☆ probably a slightly sad stone face
How did they manage to make such a beautiful nostalgia-inducing melody?
I don't thing a song has ever perfectly represented what I'm always hearing in my head, until now.
i just confronted my mom about how she took my childhood away from me and forced me to mature so i could handle all of the stuff she put onto me
she also made me believe my dad was a monster for more then half of my life but now i know she was incorrect 😁 thank you dad for being so cool
This always brings me to tears thinking about someone dear to my heart yet makes me feel better in some way, I love Teen Suicide so damn much.
I hope u talking bout the song
@@mr.gooddonut2969 wha? Assuming ur talking abt the part I said I love Teen Suicide yes I mean them not like, actual yknow
A perfect song to relax
RIP to the things I'll never get to relive:
- Running barefoot of the sidewalk even though it's littered with pine needles and rocks
- Drinking water straight from the hose
- Accidentally eating sand at the beach whenever you wipe your lips
- Snowball fights
- Sledding
- Snow angels
- Building snowmen
- And running my hands under warm water after they freeze up
- Those naps I would take after coming home from school
- Being able to wake up early in the morning before my family and spending that time watching tv
- Chasing after the ice cream man
- Pillow forts
- Sleepovers
- Hide 'n Seek
- Tag
- Hiding under the blanket with my favorite stuffed animal during storms
- Going places with mom and dad and getting spoiled
- Innocence and not understanding world problems
- Time with mom and dad pre-divorce
- The idea that we could never die young
rip to the old guy i poisoned when i was a kid too peak wallah
This comment hit hard on my soul (rip the old times)
i don't know how much you need to hear this but you matter and there's always someone there for you and if you think there isn't I am here and I love you whoever you are
Imagine listening to this at graduation. You look at everyone throwing their caps and cheering. But for you it seems like time stoped but it went so fast at the same time. You remember making your first friend, your first favorite teacher, your first time breaking down because of the overwhelming amount of work and the first crush you had. You don’t want to leave that all behind, but you have too. You have to go to college, move, get married and have kids. So you just accept it and move on. I don’t want to move on. I’m still a kid at heart and I’m scared of growing up. I’m scared.
I've been there, and I can tell you this: You don't have to.
You learn how to live alone, go to work, pay your bills, but we're all still kids at heart.
You forget some people, you keep some at heart, and you met a lot of new ones.
You'll get there and you won't even notice!
@@ShuyaTheDark Thank you. It’s been so hard lately and this helped me so much. You have no idea. Thank you so much.
The fact is… I’ve been thinking of this when I was a kid in general. And still am about forgetting myself. Like… ending up so stressed and lost that I will lose that light and dreams my childhood self had. :((
its terrifying that im only a year or two from experiencing this fate
That’s crazy cause I listened to this on graduation four years ago, same feeling
Reminds me of my positive memories of being a toddler. Makes me cry a bit on how time goes fast. Even tho it’s been 12 years, it still feels like it was yesterday that I was on the couch waiting for mama to bring me a baby bottle of milk. Those were the days. I still kinda cry thinking of it, but from listening to this song I was able to calm down knowing that I have a future ahead of me, with my lover and supporting friends and family.
I swear this song always gets to me. It will never fail to make me cry because I listened to this so much after my dad had passed away and it only gives me memories of how much my heart hurt at the time
i want this to play while i dangle my legs off a bridge, middle of the night, just enjoying the cool breeze. maybe even blasting this in my car, all the windows rolled down and speeding down an abandoned street.
jesus christ this always has me in tears
This song helped me a lot. I was at a low point when I found out she was gone and this comforted me so much. Whenever I listen to this I think of her and how good friends we were. I wonder what she’s doing now.
idk why but the woman speaking at the end saved my life whoever that woman is i love her
I have had this album for a while. Glad to see they are here now.
hi
This song puts me back right back into the anorexic mind I had back in my middle teens, where you kinda watch everything happen but never feel really there, and even after years since I can’t remember a thing. It’s like you lose years of your life to a blurry headache, and when you want to reconnect with people, they’re not the same and you haven’t grown up with them. There’s no memory of fond memories, and it all seems like a distorted mess. That’s the situation this song emulates for me
I don't advise dwelling too much in the past. It can be blurry, it can be sad, or put a smile on your face, but it frequently robs you of your present.
Be mindful, and remember to do this every once in a while. Take some time to turn off the music, turn off your thoughts. Listen and observe the things happening near you. If you don't do it now, you've lost your chance.
❤ same
You know those random memories you have without rhyme or reason? Like 1 specific day or moment that really has no value but you remember it anyway? When I was about 6 my mom and I came back from shopping, and the sun was setting by the time we were done packing. I lived in the middle of nowhere with fields surrounding us. I remember climbing to the top of our playset(a good 15-20ft) and watching the sunset. I remember how cold it was out, the orange and yellow hues that I've failed to recreate in my art, and the calling of my mom to come inside. This song somehow reminds me of that moment, and I dont think I'll ever know why. Maybe it's that feeling of never being able to go back to that moment of pure innocence. The happiness and calm I felt was something unexplainable. I didn't know much about the world, about the future. I didn't have any worries or stress, I was only thinking of the sunset. It's the urge to go back to that. That sense of calm without fear of something going wrong. Songs like these bring back moments like that, and its refreshing. So to whomever reads this; have a good day/night, eat a snack you deserve it, and dont forget to drink water
Same to you
Why do I feel nostalgic?
nice pfp
@@jonathanbrando5317 ah another man of culture I see, thank you
I do too.
I see people sharing stuff from their childhood and that made me think how i almost completely forgot about mine - about all the gardening with my grandmother, all the old friends, dumb stories- and it's all because I've been thinking about how the last 4 years I've been dealing with depression. It started out slow and each year it would get worse. This year it went as far as crippling - i couldn't do anything at all but stay in bed. I wouldn't take care of myself, wouldn't eat, hydrate or get up. I'd either sleep or lay in bed staring at the wall. I'm trying to get out of it - it's really hard but i like to think I'm making a little bit of progress everyday. I hope everyone else who's having a hard time right now are making some progress towards feeling better too.
I lost almost everyone else, but I don’t want to loose her too. She’s my closest friend. We are fine and not drifting apart but I still have that fear.
You'll only be going through that horrible event twice if you keep thinking about it buddy. Try to relax and actually live in the moment.
My cousins had a house that i’ll never forget. We would all sit in a little room upstairs and talk and play. I remember me and my cousin taking blankets and pillows and sitting behind a big desk, or sitting in the bathroom playing on our tablets. They moved out a long time ago and i will forever miss that house. So many more unforgettable memories were made there. Im honestly heartbroken all those times will never be made again. That house is now owned by somebody else, but I still get to pass by it. I didn’t live in it, but it felt like I did. Half of my childhood was there.
I hate that I just found this and it’s so good yet so sad, especially the instrumental alone :/ I miss how everything was back then
Often times we don't slow down to thing about the grudges, resetments, and anger that we hold onto everyday, in our body, in our heart, and in our mind.
We will find peace. this song will be the reminder that it is possible to listen to this when your sad, but one day happy. This song is something I listen to because I love it. It does make me sad though. Makes my heart feel sour, but my ears feel like heaven. It’s worth it. But one day both will feel like heaven, because one day I’ll truly be happy.
It's these type of songs that you never heard of once in your life but the second you listen to it, them good memories fly everywhere left and right
EXACTLY OML
i dont know if youll ever find this, but part of me hopes you do. ive loved you for the past three years, but ive just been too afraid to tell you. im happy that youve found someone else who makes you complete, but as happy as i am being your friend, the pain i get in my chest every day is making it harder and harder. its all my fault. youre my everything and you dont even know it
this is for one person out there, you know you haunt my every day and night when I sleep you're all I dream about and even though you hurt me so much without even trying I love you so much and I miss you but I know Im bad for you no matter how much anyone has told me Im complete cancer, besides there's a much better person in your life that I cannot even possibly dream about topping, hes good for you he mostly does good things stay with him, this is a message that will never reach you but I just want you to know Im so sorry that im such a depressed person and in all 21 of my miserable years my short time with you was the only time I wasnt drowning in depression. its been nice knowing you, goodbye forever probably
I know it’s probably too personal, but...
My only grandpa I’ve ever known passed away about 2 months ago, it was very sudden.
If I’m being honest, it was too sudden... especially for my grandma. She’s been through so much, so many of her loved ones passing away. And him going away is so hard for her. How she has to endure so much heartbreak...
I just hope that she’ll find peace one day.
I hope grandpa will too.
To anyone who has gone through the same, just know they’re never really gone. You’ll always love them, and they’ll always love you.
❤️
damn bruh thats sad have a good day man
Same exact story wit my grandma. Very sudden
December 1st, 2020
Thanks for the comments, it makes me feel I’m not alone in this.
Same but I never got to meet my grandparents at all. Wish you luck in the future, stay strong.
what a gem, whats the audio clip at the end from?
thats from me
@@agnimitroghosh94 holy shit u like black metal too
@@agnimitroghosh94 bugger off
@@v4mpk1tty38 love it lol
ok but like actually wheres it from
this song gets me
GOD DAMN THIS TRACK IS SO GOOD
Dear Future Me, please if things get hard, keep striving. Please keep pushing the barrier
Please keep this away from tiktok forever
Watch it not
It got to it
@@ChapinTB a sad day for society
i’m gonna hold your hand when i tell you this
summer 2021 anthem and even though it was the worst time of my life, i still miss it so much
My brother was so kind to me.
Always invented the funniest games to play, always nice, laughing...
He never got angry at me.
I was a crappy child, always screaming and selfish, and he was like an angel.
I just wish I could go back to those time when we were kids...i just wish this time I could appreciate his presence more....
He's an adult now. He has his own life.
I can never go back to those times.
I lost him.
I lost myself.
I just...wanna go back with you....
This song is like a mixture of how depression feels and how it feels after surviving depression
Fr, and that’s one reason why I love this song
This song makes me nostalgic but it's my first time hearing it
like,, same man!
okay this is freaking me out now
This makes me relive the good days man. Completely throws me back to when I was 14-17 years old and had absolutely no worries in life. Man
i love how some people have depressing memories attached to this song while others have happy ones. god i love this song
I had friends, a lot.
Decisions I made and they made.
Time passes, distance lengthens.
I miss you.
I would do things differently knowing what I know now.
It’s been years since I’ve seen you both.
I remember all of us in a positive manner.
I hope you can say the same.
You know, often times we don’t sit down to think about the grudges, resentment, and anger that we hold on to everywhere in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds. Whether you’re aware of it or not, I am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself.
I started playing this song in the car while driving past my old neighborhood, started crying
am i the only who LOVES the ending? it’s really calm and nostalgic
for some reason this song makes me feel depressed and nostalgic at the same time
a feeling of a child enjoying things not knowing their family is a mess and lives happily until they understand
this gives me nostalgia for some reason
Fr☠️☠️☠️☠️
I have so many questions. Nostalgia and other inexpressible feelings are over me all the time. This song takes me to all liminal spaces I've been since kid, and that makes wonder what has happened in those places. It evokes kind of an impotence on me, because I don't want them to be forgotten. I know that the eight year old child, that I once was, stills alive somewhere in liminality. I want to express so many things that cant be expressed with words, we the humans are certainly complex but beautiful.
this song reminds me of the nights I’d spend on my ds late at night. not worrying about anxious thoughts, not being scared of abandonment, only worrying about my nintendogs and what place id get in Mario kart. I miss it
This song makes me cry so hard cuz of the odd nostalgia it gives me, I love it so much.
I really miss the times before covid happened, I was so much happier back then. I miss my old friends and I wasn't so insecure too :(
Pov:you commit suicide in ur room and you have to stay there all eternity watching ur family members walk in, reminisce, talk to you through notes that you can’t respond to on repeat until their eventual death
Or
You do respond to the notes and due to them being Christian they think the devil is writing them and they ask a priest to bless the room and soon to find out ur now nonexistent or i guess set free into the world.
I know this sounds “edgy” but im not meaning it that way i just think the concept is kinda heart felt
@@skwoopy idk why i wrote this
I find it cringe now so i may delete
@@duskygamer5468 i like this first idea you presented actually, it's pretty damn sad.
makes it sound a bit trivializing dont you think? like its just a story you read and then forget abt it when this is so many ppl's reality
life moves pretty fast you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it
i love how we’re all feeling the same thing while listening to this
[Verse] 0:36
I wanna be haunted
I wanna be loved
I want a lot of friends and
A lot of drugs
0:56
I wanna be haunted
I won't leave my bed
I won't go crazy, and I
I won't get sad
[Chorus] 1:13
So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh
So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh
So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh
So haunt me, haunt me, haunt me, ooh
[Outro]
And follow the path you were destined to have
You know, oftentimes we don't slow down to think about the grudges, resentments, and anger that we hold on to every day, in our bodies, in our hearts, and in our minds
Whether you're aware of it or not, I am willing to bet you that there is a way that you are disappointed in yourself, that there is a way that-
this is the second time I've discovered this songs and it's definitely been a while..
just leaving a comment here for whenever I happen upon this song in the future :)
* vibes happily *
This makes me long for one of those teenage lives advertised in 90s movies and TV shows, like Skins or Kids (1995). Not just drugs, sex and alcohol, but also skate, late night partying and hanging out with your friends at dusk in a shady place.
I know it's not healthy, and I guess I'm glad I grew up away from all that... but TV made it seem so chill that I can't help but wonder.
I wonder how the people living in my old houses are doing. I hope they’re all okay. I hope that they find the old stuff that was left behind and maybe wonder if the people who left it are okay too
this is perfect for when I am celebrating my birthday alone while both of my parents are asleep
This song makes me feel so nostalgic for my friends. A year and a half or so ago, when the pandemic first properly started I went through one of the worst times mentally I've ever experienced. I cut off all of my friends, not because I didn't like them, that wasn't the reason at all. Talking became too overwhelming, I hated this person I was becoming and didn't want to drag them down with me, even though all they wanted was to help me. Cut to now, I'm no longer depressed but I have zero friends. The habit of cutting everyone I talk to off has manifested itself in me so much to the point where I can't physically make any friends. I miss being able to have someone to talk to, to go out and see. I resent myself for what I did now, and wish it could've been different. I want to text them out of nowhere one day and rekindle everything but I'm so scared as to what their reaction would be. They have every right to hate me for disappearing, and although I know, this nothing could possibly prepare me for the confirmation that they do indeed hate me. Things are different now anyway, they've changed. I've changed. But I still miss them so damn much.
Just try and get them all together and just explain why you had a hard time. If u trust your friends with all your heart, tell them why you couldn’t talk to them. It’s ok to try. Please be safe💕💕
I feel some type of way while listening to this song. Sometimes i think about how ungrateful im to my parents and how im gonna loose them some day, and i dont see the amount of love they offer me and how i offend them cuz if my stupid thoughts. Im not ready to lose em :(
The comments are so wholesome and sweet 😭
Some graduated
Some died
Some ended their lives
Some went insane
And some how this song just brings us all together and others by memory.
I can’t believe I am living. I am barely aware that time is going and I can’t progress change. I have failed so much in life i am starting to believe that succes isn’t for me. I try and i try and i keep adjusting my ways of going trough life to make progress but all it has lead to is a deep hole of self hatred and lack of will go live. I don’t know if i want to leave the earth or be someone else, it’s all a big blur of emptiness and I don’t know what is coming of where i will be. I am 21 but i still feel 16 while also able to be very mature. I hope i can one day come back to this comment and mark this me as history.
Idk why it just feels..... Nice. All the old memories I've spent with my friends, family, and how i was so sweet and cheerful back then. But this is the present now, we can't go back in time so.... I guess we'll just deal with it :)
9 years old now, soon will be the 10 year anniversary
depression and suicide aside,this is actually a banger
I wish we could have fixed what we had.
I wish I had tried harder.
I wish I hadn't been so sensitive.
I wish you'd cared more.
I hope you love them.
I hope you're happy.
i am pooing
This song forces me to be nostalgic about things I never wanted to think about again. Do it again.
For some reason, this makes me want to go back to when humans first came to earth, so I could enjoy nature
It each of Knights from Shovel knight had a song, this would be specter knights because he is a severely depressed ghost who wants nothing but his past back, his friend Luan and Reize, the great adventures he had. Now he is stuck in the Lich Yard forever to be it’s Gaurdian, living a lonely life of recluse and self loathing for ruining himself. Maybe someday, this old flying corpse will get to rest, but until then, only pain ensues.
I remember I had an ant colony in my old back garden. I used to name the ants normal human names like “Steve, Sarah, etc” then one day my dad destroyed the colony :(
I remember in school when it was summer me and my friends would put holes in the caps of our plastic water bottles and have a water fight. We would be soaking wet but it was one of the funnest things ever.
I remember me and my friends got chased by dogs and when we hopped over a fence my friends shoe got stolen by one of the dogs.
I remember when in school we were reading the iron giant book, and the teacher played a short animated video of the opening of the book. The short video scared me and I couldn’t sleep for a month
i remember listening to this song when i was younger. crazy how nothing has changed.