How to Know if Your Marriage is TRULY Over

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  • Опубликовано: 11 сен 2024
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    Melanie Tonia Evans is a great resource for healing from Narcissistic Abuse. And if you are needing help leaving an abusive marriage, call 800-799-7233
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    Monika Hoyt, LICSW | Monika Hoyt helps couples and individuals whose marriages are on the brink transform their relationships from the inside-out. She focuses on changing limiting beliefs, building emotional connection, and getting on the same team for life.
    This channel covers topics like how to trust in a relationship, how to deal with narcissistic personality disorder or emotional abuse in relationships, and how to prevent divorce.
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    Website: monikahoyt.com
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Комментарии • 42

  • @pjmrees
    @pjmrees 9 месяцев назад +11

    24 years wasted on a porn addicted, physical, mental, emotionally abusive narcissist. Do not waste your life on them.

    • @saraojala6283
      @saraojala6283 9 месяцев назад

      Same. 24 years and he hasn't been able to overcome his addiction. He's a decent guy otherwise but this issue makes it hard to want to continue staying

    • @ChristinaJoyEmpowered
      @ChristinaJoyEmpowered 9 месяцев назад

      @@saraojala6283is he willing to try a 12-step fellowship?

  • @paulbooij7594
    @paulbooij7594 Месяц назад +1

    My taste in women changed during my marriage. I thought "She is fun, intense, aggressive, this is great!"
    Years later, "WTF was i thinking? I would take warm, nurturing, and feminine now."

  • @chrystallee1563
    @chrystallee1563 9 месяцев назад +8

    Silent treatment of nearly 11 months. Wouldn’t even acknowledge me. I ended up packing up and moving out.

    • @MonikaHoyt
      @MonikaHoyt  9 месяцев назад +1

      that sounds like the right decision! Silent treatment is emotional abuse

    • @iznon
      @iznon 9 месяцев назад

      I’m so sorry. I understand how you feel.

    • @controllerfreak3596
      @controllerfreak3596 9 месяцев назад +1

      thats also just super immature of them.

    • @bobsanderz3005
      @bobsanderz3005 9 месяцев назад

      11 months?? That’s brutal! You made the right choice. Best wishes

    • @jamiesauter57
      @jamiesauter57 4 месяца назад +1

      That's me, right now. No effort on her part. If I didn't initiate conversation, we would never talk unless she needs something. Been a few months now and it's like she has a separate life. Used to be her +1 for 20yrs now she just goes out by herself

  • @Gizmodi
    @Gizmodi 3 месяца назад +1

    I failed to stop communicating when i shoukdnhabe. Its hard when they are the only one who listens..hard life lesson and now trying to climb this mountain back alone

  • @melkerner
    @melkerner Месяц назад

    I am not with a narcissist - I am with an Avoidant. Complete lack of empathy, only invested in her "safety" and walls / control issues. Life dream - I want physical affection and sex - she wants NOTHING. over 8 years without as much as a kiss. Changed after we adopted the kids, and now I am an outsider and an undesired person who is just a roommate with responsibility but no affection

    • @paulbooij7594
      @paulbooij7594 Месяц назад

      Oh my goodness, I just figured this out with my wife.
      Found the manosphere, got fit, earned more, became more attractive to women, and my wife can't stand me now.

  • @iznon
    @iznon 9 месяцев назад +3

    Monika, do you know of a good forum to discuss stuff like this? I’m so gaslighted, I might as well be on one of the Jovian planets.

    • @FolkOutThere
      @FolkOutThere Месяц назад

      Would love to connect & share stories! I've literally found clones of my story just on a few comments on random vids.
      What is it you want to talk about? (I triedreddit, but... that didn't really work for me. So I just use comments now )

    • @iznon
      @iznon Месяц назад

      @@FolkOutThere sure, that that’s no problem. I’m sorry you’re experiencing what you’ve had to go through. It honestly takes a long time to attenuate the grief from these things, but it’s possible.

  • @jimmytaz1744
    @jimmytaz1744 9 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you for consistently sound advice 🙏🏽

    • @MonikaHoyt
      @MonikaHoyt  9 месяцев назад

      You're so welcome!

  • @tylercrooks8659
    @tylercrooks8659 3 месяца назад

    Great posts. I appreciate your channel. Would you say that so many people calling others “narcissists “ is more often two people that could benefit from looking at the dynamics at hand, and their part vs their partners that comprise the fry experience ?

  • @paulohinton9481
    @paulohinton9481 9 месяцев назад +1

    Only time can heal itself imo.

    • @MonikaHoyt
      @MonikaHoyt  9 месяцев назад +2

      it's what we do with that time that makes the difference!

    • @FolkOutThere
      @FolkOutThere Месяц назад

      ​@@MonikaHoyt💯! As someone who waited years, was convinced the changes were enough (while some issues remained)... if your lucky enough to never go through it, then yes it can seem that way. But time is equivalent to whatever changes were needed. This woman is spot on with her advice, much different than others. It's almost like she's been there & hears a lot of people's stories...
      I took the same amount of time apart from my partner, but I changed & he stayed the same. I believed in time, and denied this. "I changed in our separation, I'm sure he did too!"
      Absolutely not. When I realized that, it was literally traumatic to come to terms with my delusion.

  • @janegriffin3872
    @janegriffin3872 9 месяцев назад +2

    Yes he has been silent- ugh

    • @MonikaHoyt
      @MonikaHoyt  9 месяцев назад

      that is hard I'm sorry

  • @mikegreene8461
    @mikegreene8461 9 месяцев назад +4

    Women are not worth the struggle anymore.

    • @kirataylor4981
      @kirataylor4981 9 месяцев назад +2

      Neither are men😂

    • @mikegreene8461
      @mikegreene8461 9 месяцев назад

      I never dated a man, I do not swing that way. 🤪@@kirataylor4981

    • @sarcasticcat4982
      @sarcasticcat4982 9 месяцев назад

      Men haven't been worth the struggle for a long time.
      You invest, they hit about 40ish and destroy your marriage, your kids, and you as they dump you for a younger woman who in the end will abuse, rob, and destroy them.😂

    • @atypocrat1779
      @atypocrat1779 9 месяцев назад

      lol

    • @PeterNorthsLeftTesticle
      @PeterNorthsLeftTesticle 9 месяцев назад

      Enjoy your cats ​@@kirataylor4981.

  • @PeterNorthsLeftTesticle
    @PeterNorthsLeftTesticle 9 месяцев назад +1

    Birky Water Filter in the background.

  • @thoenyhills217
    @thoenyhills217 7 месяцев назад

    This woman is the poster child for not getting married. What man would possibly want to come home to this BS ?

    • @FolkOutThere
      @FolkOutThere Месяц назад

      What BS specifically? Just curious & trying to learn more... because as a viewer, I'm not frustrated by "coming home to this". This is SELF-work. If that deters you, then maybe it's not the other person (who is living in this work everyday to be better partner) fault

    • @melkerner
      @melkerner Месяц назад

      I have found her advice and information extremely helpful.

  • @mikegreene8461
    @mikegreene8461 9 месяцев назад +1

    If you can see the white at the top of their eyeballs "like this woman" it means they are nuts. Run!!!