Yes, funny they like to have someone “successful” yet they want the spotlight. My ex didn’t like that I made more money than him. He said it wouldn’t bother him during our dating phase, yet it cams up when we got married.
Amen...I did too run for my life and yes pastor negativity and drama and soon as I saw the false self took him to court for domestic violence bcz he tried to kill me went no contact immediately...blocked him on social media...filed first divorce 3 weeks before final hearing he put someones address in the county I live in and lost money then refiled...yes pastor quicksand...discernment and one step ahead...blindsided because he thought he had a one up on me and yes like you said discarded emotionally first step bcz he thought I was so blinded that he got me real good...in court victory was mine he was uh..uh...no sympathy for the devil...
A narcissist can’t stand to be ignored. 😌 but will give you the silent treatment to get you upset. When it backfires they will try a different more sinister approach.
They sure can't stand to be ignored. Good or bad attention from anyone and preferably everyone. They really are something else and not in a good way but they don't care. Just as long as you are looking at their a** and giving them 190% of your attention every second of every minute of every hour of every day. Someone else pays you attention, ooooh noooo can't have that. Gotta jump up and intercept that one. Go somewhere else to get away from them... we'll get ready for hem to follow, not because they love you or are concerned for your well being, but they see you as a slave or property, and number two, no one else will put up with their sht. I believe since I've been away from my narc, although they've ruined and smeared me to the max and everyone out here, people that have been stuck around them are starting to actually see the real them and what I must have gone through. And they know if they didn't buy friends they wouldn't really have any. I'm just exhausted. And flipped it around to make me look like the narc and sabotaged my life and helped caused me to lose everything, (when usually I 100% believe most times people are responsible for their own mess) but folks are I think finally starting to see... now what I want to know is why I am suffering this "karma" everyone mentions, when this person/persons are so evil to do me this way? Is it wrong for me to want to see them get their "karma" that I am reaping? It's nowhere near fair.
Sunshine S Let vengeance be mine said the Lord! They will reap that which they sow! Leave it alone. I’m watching it happen to the EX AND HIS MOTHER NOW! And boy are they reaping their own harvest. Me, I’m content with sitting on the side lines and letting God be God, all by Himself!
@@sunshines4555 their Karma is their everyday life.... They are empty vessels....have no values, no love and nothing of substance.....I can't be nice to live such a life they are miserable and not lovable people once you figure them out you cant love them and they know it and it kills them
Everything he describe happened to me. Especially, the part about how a Narc will go around to everyone at your church, job, friends, & family assassinating your name & character to protect his false image.
My mom, who is over 75 yrs old has allowed a narcissist to sleep on her couch for 3 years now. We had a big fall about this man being in the house. Everything you said happens, I mean everything. I don't know what to do to help my mom see that she is dealing with a narcissist I
Yes indeed! This recently happened to me also. I'm just trusting that God will have His way with that nut because the flagrant lies from that pathological lying sociopathic manipulative predatory cheating psychopath were hurtful and beyond indecent. I'm so glad my heart is healed, but it's quite upsetting. Everything Pastor is saying is More than true!
Y would you think it’s ok to do this at church? Oh I guess in their minds making you seem like the bad guy makes them look more like the Christian. I would be so turned off, he wouldn’t even share with me anymore lol.
My Ex is this way to the fullest. He has done all these things to the fullest. IM still healing from this relationship. It has been the most painful relationship I ever had in my life. I just believe the narcissistic is demonic.
The Narcissist is truly demonic and evil. They don’t have the ability to admit whenever they do something wrong!!! Sweetheart the lord is with you, things will get better with time. Pray for discernment and wisdom. The person who hurt you, doesn’t have empathy, love or cares. The Narcissist is simply used to kill, steel and destroy your joy and self esteem. I couldn’t believe how evil and twisted the Narcissist is. Everyday I thank God for saving my life. Don’t focus on any negative words spoken over your life. The Narc will tell lies accuse you of things you haven’t done. Call you crazy. God can’t be mocked, the person who hurt you, will give a account to God. Be careful not to get back together with him. Guard your heart and emotions. God will deliver you ❤️
Jasmine Suther stay no contact if you can. You’ll heal faster and your strength, peace and happiness will return sooner rather than later. Be patient with yourself during this healing time and impose intentional self care. All the best.
Never EVERRRRR argue with a narc. Folks its a LOSING battle even when u r slapping them with the truth. U will go in circles and all kinds of UNRELATED topics will be dragged in. Its so exhausting. Useless. Professional victim is right. Wow-- GREAT VIDEO
Nubian Khaleesi I wish I knew this years ago before I ended up being smeared all over my church and people stopped talking to me for no reason. I couldn’t figure out what was going on.
This scares me. I thought something was wrong with me but this is what they want you to believe. It's damaging to your mind, spirit, and soul. You will need twice the amount of healing from a narcissist than the average person.
I should have a PhD in this subject! The narcissist will starve trying to get any attention from me! I'm not the one! God has given me wisdom in this area! Saying absolutely nothing to them says a lot!!!! They want attention it doesn't matter if it's positive or negative attention! You're dealing with a demon!!!! So, you have to do the opposite of what the enemy is provoking you to do! Life is too short to be in a perpetual state of misery!!!!
Amen. last Sunday I attend service my husband came along sat there I assume he was praying once service was over he went to the package store once home he began to drink his evil sprit after he drank his evil sprit that demon he serves attacked me verbal abuse demonic possession yes he's a narcissist called me ever thing but the child of God. yes he's never wrong he did all the cheating. but always say ing I was cheating which is a lie. talk about church that demon that controls his spritual soul. all that night the things he had and was saying made me sick to my stomach. yes this demon is never wrong. when he fell asleep I pack some things I left that morning while he slept hard and drunk. that demon only went to church with me to blasphemy the sprit of god, he was saying about me you suppose to be a woman of god , he said you ain't shish bitch you ain't know wife you're nothing but a ho. yes he's a waste of my time he just turned 63 Nov 14, Im not going back he's a true demon.
@@cubbiesmith4505 I am praying for you and that you get the healing & freedom you deserve!!!! Seek God without ceasing & go will order your steps! Sending you love,hugs& prayers my beloved!!!!
+Diannah Minefee Thank you never mentioned ten years abuse to any of my family the only one i had was my sister she passd on two years now. I married this demon age 50 first marriage I didn't know what I've learned only a year ago today, 60 this April pass discarded this nightmare created molded by lucifer himself anything to blasphem the love of thee almighty god.
The narc would intentionally cause you emotional pain. When you confront them causing you to go off on them, they'll sit there in silence and watch you have an emotional breakdown.
@@elizabethabuhaija9706 I'm sorry but what i did was started making him not like being around me. Not talking to him, always having an attitude...things like that. Just be the total opposite of who you really are and this should help. Godspeed
@@babydoll5396 thank you I will take your advice I'm really glad to hear that I wasn't the only good woman was going through this I felt like I was alone thank you sweetie God bless you
yes pastor, I went through thiS with a man for seven in half years, he always lied, cheat, used me, I was like his slave. always talk about me, saying always my fault, then I pray to God and God open my eyes when I got sick, my heart went 220 beats per minute, I felt I was dying the doctor had to give meds to slow my heart, that was my wake up call, then I left him it's been a year, I went no contact and I'm free and happy, going to church, my life change to the better, now I do things I never did before and now I know my worth.
I have the same story except I was with mine 8 years and my body started giving me signs it was time to leave. My immune system broke down I was constantly tired because I was stressed. My muscles tensed I couldn't sleep. Once my doctor put me on muscle relaxers I knew it was time to move on and I did. My strength and faith in God is saving me. I feel blessed everyday.
The Narcissist has many personalities negativity, they cover up all things, is your fault never theirs, they play victim to often! And, the things they say about you to other ppl is just unreal is painful to deal with a narcissist dealt with one for 20 years! They're evil! They are sure actors! You'll never get closure to your pain with a narcissist or anything for that matter!
They will copy and steal your identity. From your vehicle to your workouts your hobbies to having their new supply buy and do things you have or do. They are really strange and sad individuals. If you discard one, they will try to punish you for life and try to make you so jealous of the things they are doing. Ignore one and you’ll see strange behavior too. I feel that they were emotionally neglected in their childhood and left alone a lot to run around without boundaries, which is one reason why they hate boundaries and love to push on them. They grow up(well not really) and run circles around you and drive you nuts. Confusion tactics. Spin artist. But they are the friendliness and most happy people you’ll meet. It’s all FAKE. Ok there I got my vent out. Thanks RC!
Yup after my narcissist left the chicks were all trying to have twins like me, 1 was from ny like me as well and wore wedge sandals like me, they must of told these chicks what I do.
The sad part is they are so delusional and living in their own world even when you tell a narcissist about themselves they don't believe it. My ex used to laugh when I brought it up to him, like I would pull his characteristics out of thin air.
Not just religion pastor! Look at our government, politicians and most CEOS... most of them are narcissist and our society rewards these behaviors and seen them as leader-like...
Milka yes they crave positions of influence and control ... the overt ones. The covert ones seek positions of trust where they operate unsuspected. Pastor , youth group leader , teacher, babysitter, firefighter, school bus driver, school counselor, baseball coach and helpful handyman fixing stuff . They fit someplace in the community where they get respect and don’t arouse suspicion. They are staging things early on so they can do bad things - and when you expose them nobody believes you. They say you are crazy. You are isolated with no support ...that’s what they want and engineer the whole thing too slowly for you to detect. . Cloaked in kindness and gifts and generosity. They use everything. They are very patient and pretend when the payoff is high enough . It’s actually scary. My ex wore Disney sweatshirts, lifeguard shirts , firefighter shirts and security guard shirts . He was none of these professions. Like Pastor Blakes said in an earlier video ... CAMOUFLAGE TO MAKE PREY FEEL COMFORTABLE IN A LIFE THREATENING SITUATION
Pastor I am being gaslighted for 2.9 years GOD made me mentally strong to see it to the end and GOD was in the middle...No contact instituted that immediately from taking him to court keeps stalking/breaking into my home last breakin end September stealing jewelry...personal belongings...1 yr 2 months no contact..3.5 months divorced and demon/devil will not leave me alone devil from hell...satan in its entirety..tried to kill me for a gc and to obtain my assets...to learn.. understand..be knowledgeable and aware of lucifer...
Dtella55 please be safe. Move if you can. Get a dog, video Surveillance, an alarm , or a gun or pepper spray . my ex stole some of my things too ... and I think the reason was to keep me in anxiety so I couldn’t focus on my work (my income and my reputation) and s reason for me to “keep coming back to him” in communication begging for my things, which he locked 🔒 down in his own self storage unit (he couldn’t keep a job in Northern Virginia when he moved here and was evicted and homeless sleeping in his car , doing Craigslist handyman tasks and had stuff in self storage unit). I wanted so much to break into that unit and get MY stuff but get who would have gotten in trouble and look like the thief? Me. Unbelievable how they stage you to look like exactly and incorrectly who they actually are. They try to drive you insane so they can blame you . At the end of my relationship I felt he would have loved me to kill my self so he could run off with all my nice things because he had nothing but his clothes and tools . When you tell people this stuff , you sound crazy but thank god Pastor Blakes understands its the narcissist who is crazy - it’s a disorder in the DSM. And when we reveal what they do , we sound crazy . Get out . Don’t dare. Heal. . Seek peace and rediscover who you once were . The videos on RUclips will give you intellectual closure on what really happened .
I've been dealing with a narcissist for 4 years. I have finally gotten the strength to walk away. They are toxic individuals and will suck the life out of you. They thrive off drama and will make you feel like you are crazy when in reality they are! They have a good way of reeling you back in when they sense you are done so go NO CONTACT and move on. I felt like my life had been on hold for 4 years waiting for him to change but narcissist NEVER change.
Been married 17 years to my narcissist "pastor" husband. So much heartache and drama. God just opened the for me and my kids to leave and I am so grateful. You are nailing this Pastor. Keep teaching!
Yes I will mention a challenge i am experiencing and he will dismiss my feelings and bring the attention on himself guilt tripping that i complain too much and that if he had been in my shoes he would be better off. Today i can see the pathological envy and jealously.
Hey Pastor Blakes - I’ve been married to a narcissist for 15yrs. And even though I always knew something was wrong with my husband, I never knew it had a name. Found out through marriage counseling for his serial cheating. I now have been separated from him for over a yr and have started divorce proceedings and it has been sooo interesting how my husband has done the very things you described. It’s been so interesting how some of my church family has taken his side (to include my pastor) and turned on me. But because we still attend the same church I’ve been quieter than a church mouse in this whole ordeal. And my silence has been the BEST thing that I’ve ever done. I have refused to speak to him in any setting and am letting God speak for me. I will say this: being married to this toxic person has brought me nearer to God I’m so many ways. And since I’m a glass half full kinda girl, thats one of the lessons that I’ve learned. Thank you for your ministry!!!
I don't understand how the pastor could turn on you. Sounds like your in the wrong 'church ' Jesus was clear that adultery is grounds for divorce. Paul even said a man must love his wife like Christ loves the church.
Narcs are demonized, but the Power of the Holy Spirit through prayer will you deal them such a blow that they’ll never know what hit them. Do what you need to do to protect yourself and then step aside and allow God to do what He ONLY can do, and dealing with the narc is part of that. He’s done it before! E.g, David in the Bible was delivered from narcissistic Saul, Abigail 1Sam 25: delivered from Narcissistic husband Nabal.
You might not be a professional psychologist, but you are anointed by God and educating yourself. Together, and with your gifting from God, these videos are golden. Don't stop what you are doing. You are helping and will help many people. I study all personality disorders and read about them constantly and there is a way of communicating you have that is real, specific and very impactful. thank you.
Yes, I agree. I’ve discovered that my spouse is a covert narcissist...Very hard to detect but when I started to research his behaviors and antics and I stumbled across narcissistic traits...I’ve been with this person for a very long time until I’ve discovered is true self. Now the mask has come completely off and his very “true colors” have been highlighted...
Look. 7k+ listeners in 24 hours. THAT'S how many people are trying to figure out how to deal with this phenomenon. SO grateful Pastor RC is also SO Into trying to figure this thing out.
Actually, some CN will apologize but is it the coldest apology on the planet. These immoral monsters are not capable of empathy. Everything is the victims fault, and this thing will continue to make excuses for their sad behavior. These immoral monsters will not change, but are full of excuses. We must continue to pray and stay NO CONTACT with these demons.
Also, narcs are oftentimes codependents. This only confuses the matter all the more. They need your approval and they don't. They want the recognition and demand the attention while detaching from you to cause you pain. They are oftentimes borderline as well. All of which, becomes the life of the partner. Best tool is NO CONTACT, prayer, regaining your friendships away from them, separating social lives, finding healthy habits and hobbies, SEEK PROFESSIONAL guidance and SPEAK UP!
This is SO IMPORTANT! I've dealt with malignant narcs but wasn't prepared to recognize a deflated, borderline, covert spiritual narc! 2 years of madness and I'm looking back like, THAT'S why?! Is all starting to make sense after years of confusion, now working on building myself up spiritually to defend against these attacks
Soooo true!!! I didn’t know WHAT I was dealing with. Demonic! He tried to mentally and emotionally assassinate me. Messing up my sleep and had me crying all the time. I was trying harder to please him.
I agree with the majority of this message but narcissists also withhold thanks and praise as punishment. Dealing with someone who never says thanks for a delicious meal or never will give a compliment is soul rending.
Correct. They'll never acknowledge you & will discount you until you break. Nothing you do is ever good enough. I have a narcissistic mother & ex who have never apologized. They are emotionally & mentally abusive but use God's word for people to treat them right but you don't see the Word resonating in their own lives. Both of them are/were thankless. (My ex killed himself.) I bought my mom a car when she was catching the bus & she gave it away! I supported my ex when he didnt have a job & he cheated, opened sex accounts, used coke when I wasnt home & when I became pregnant, wished death on myself & our baby girl. Now that I've stopped trying to please these people, I'm the bad guy. Their opinions & feelings don't matter anymore. I now see the way they move & let them know they cannot take advantage of me nor do I believe what they say. I play head games with them by talking about narcs & the look on their faces is priceless. I laugh. You can't trust narcs. Some of them are purely evil & want to see your demise. I've experienced it.
My ex narc used to Always Always compare my cooking to his Mom and Grandma cooking. And how even people in the hospital wouldn't eat it.all the while eating dinner with no problem. I got tired of the whining and complaints I told him to fix his own meals. So he'd Buy quick meals Very Unhealthy food as well. No care for my health. Knowing I had high chlosterol 😫
Ms Q you are speaking exactly what my life us. My mom and hubby whom ive been with 20 yrs married 6 1/2. Im so tire and broken...and now getting to the place to rebuild myself to move on. Its my sons senior yr so trying to hang on. He convienced me to go back to being an at home wife and mother...now he is financially controlling to on top of all else...i have several chronic illnesses and he just maked them worse...
@@Godis4me1978 Hi. Please leave him. Find a job & leave. Look for resources within your state. They are diabolical. You cannot heal fully until you break away from their grip. I'm sorry you're going through this. They feed off your misery. They are dark & sick souls & ruled by evil. If you're able to get a job online, do it. Save your $. My ex tried to get me to move states away with him while treating me badly & telling me at the same time that if it didn't work, I'll be homeless with my son because he'd take our daughter. They are strategic with everything they do. Nothing is a mistake! Love to you.
Jane Knose people who always have to express something over you, if you express to a narcissist you achieved something, they will say they achieved something greater or know someone else who has achieved something greater. You say you have a headache,they say how they have a headache, stomach ache, and toothache. Always ‘One-Up’ on you.
PaulinaJohnson MBA my experience he would compare me to others and say they are doing better than me! I would tell him I was thought never to be jealous of other, because we never know what someone does to obtain what they have! For certain a narcissist "acts" as if they have amnesia. I have dealt with this, especially when I have done things for him as well to help him! They only care about "self" from what I see! They love exploiting others for there resources!
They secretly envy you and wish to take your place, but they are very patient and clever. They will wait until you are in a weak state then try to pounce on you or ONE UP you. They do this by stealing all of your energy, ideas and image and use it against you. Or by withholding any help to you or the relationship/Friendship etc, and storing it all up for themselves. They like to win people over over you. It's weird how they do this. Almost unexplainable.
Pastor , thought you said that was not an EXPERT ?!?! You hit that nail all up in the head ! I spent 5 out 7 days of the week trying to dodge them firey darts of accusations ! You are helping people , please do not stop !!!!
One reason why narcs need the recognition is because it satisfies that little kid inside. Mine use to overly praise me because its what he actually needed me to do for him in return. If I didn't, he would remind me of all that he did for me. It made me furious to HAVE TO KEEP UP with this behavior. The things he did were normal things that people in relationships, do. But he needed the recognition badly. I started telling him that his "9yr old self" needed my attention. That's when I knew it was over.
Im laughing but this is sad! I was the reason he cheated, I was the reason his business failed, I was lazy when he lost it all, I was the reason his life is upside down. "I MIGHT AS WELL JUST DIE! IM BETTER OFF DEAD! IF I STAY WITH YOU, I'LL BE DEAD BY 40" ---Well sir, if im the cause of all of this.. let me exit. Funny thing is your life got even worse after I was gone.
Yvette Loshaw Jesus ..!! How did you manage that ? A few???? I have only met one and that’s all it took to open my eyes ... Glad you figured it out ... Blessings !!!
On point brother ! I was married to a person just like your describing for 28 years . 27 years of fakeness and me being the bad guy . I'm blessed being able to escape this demon. I'm so thankful for JESUS grace and mercy. God bless you and your family Pastor.
Discernment is key. Listen to the Lord when he is speaking to you. In most cases, if you're not trying to date the narcissist you can hear the lies coming out of their mouth. And when you do, RUN!
So true!! They play the victim role (it's never them, never apologize and have zero regard for your feelings), and it's all about their status & reputation. Thank you, Bishop. You tell it as it is. God bless you. 🙏
No one is beyond saving from the power of Jesus...why don't I hear anything about Jesus and his delivery from demonic spirits. Jesus is still in control.
Because the NARC will have to humble themselves and pray for forgiveness, and turn away from their wicked ways. PRIDE is one of the key sins that will keep a NARC from having the humility to seek forgiveness and deliverance. Jesus will not force himself on anyone. The sinner must repent. You will note one here hundreds of posts where people have said "...and they never admit they're wrong!"
I cannot thank you enough, Pastor Blakes. You are ABSOLUTELY right on!! They love drama. If a person wants to have a peaceful life, there is no room for the narcissist! I had a narcissistic pastor husband for 4 decades. Back then, nobody even talked about narcissism. In time, God sorted it out, and I have been free from him for 8 years. You are so correct!! Always one- upping. They are everywhere! Now I recognize it in other family members. All truth, my brother!!!!
Yes Lord, preach!! I had to allow this individual I was involved with think it was his idea to leave me. But I thank God he gave me wisdom to see it was better to make it be his idea then I would never have to deal with him again.
This was exactly how I handled the situation! 😉 (After figuring out the insane levels of attempts at hoovering..) they can’t take rejection.. have to be smarter & push all of their buttons at THE same time.
Married to a narcissist and now filed for divorce and separated from this man however is now playing the victim and doing everything in his power to discredit me by using my own children. God help me. Ps Blakes so on point
I just got of a relationship with this type of sick individual. You speak nothing but the truth!! Once you wake up and realize run and stay gone for good!
I'm being treated for narcissistic abuse traumatic disorder and even my psychiatrist can't answer this. I'm hoping someone here can, why and how does the brain of a narcissist operate did they all have the same modus operandi? They all act exactly the same what triggers the brain to cause this to happen? It's like they all use the same Playbook, the exact same Playbook and they don't know each other because they don't want the competition so how does this happen? Also you're not kidding about being dangerous every time I try to leave mine he tries to kill me. He burnt my house down with me in it the first time I filed for divorce. We are separated now and I am working through the divorce please pray for me.
This Rabbit hole runs very deep, this thing called Narcissism. It truly made me look at my own narcissism and ask the question if I am the narcissist. Craziness embodied.
Holly Cook. If you asked more than likely, you're not. Most narcs think they're fine. We all some sone degree of narcissism but the lack of empathy is whats considered narcissism.
La Locks I agree. That is the insidious nature of these relationships between an empath and a narcissist. Isn’t it interesting that the fix for the empath is boundary development and subsequent enforcement. This boundary formation is then the very thing that is “pointed-out” as a “narcissistic” defect in the empath. Of course that is the error in thought process for some, and at one time myself.
Holly Cook. Yes, is strange I have been around narcissist a great deal but wasnt made aware of it until my last relationship. They are sick people. Isnt it amazing that healing ourselves is what repels them?
I sometimes thought I was a narc, only because hou I was treated by the narc. I started giving him the same treatment he gave me. I no now that I am one of God's children and always was.
Ah, projection. The fine art of making me guilty of your vices. No one projects better or more frequently than a narcissist. They’ve practiced, honed and refined projection to a fine art. Whatever they’re up to, by some mental “abracadabra,” suddenly they’re innocent and you’re actually the one up to no-good. I would argue this shows how deeply and profoundly narcissists believe in right VS wrong. If they don’t know right from wrong, why project? If they don’t care about right vs wrong, why project? If they don’t have a functioning conscience, why project? It could be for expediency. To avoid the ramifications of their actions. To keep the smooth sailing going. But, how would they know what needed to be projected, if they don’t know right from wrong? They know, oh, how they know! And therein is their undoing. Guilt? Maybe. Envy of other’s innocence? Perhaps. Avoidance of the result of wrong-doing? Now we’re getting somewhere. The need to be perfect! Bingo + all of the above. Gotta protect that fragile little ol’ ego, y’know.
This is so true. Lord help the Narcissist. They need JESUS. Lol I think some of them have a demon in them. They truly believe they are never wrong. Thank you for your teaching we need to know this.
Thank you my brother it's like you're describing my life. I left my husband of 16 years couple of months ago. I did not know any about narcissist until I began explaining to my manager about how I have been treated for years. I felt like I couldn't never used my own thoughts. I have been loosing myself. Pastor thank you. I have watched many of your videos. Will purchase the Queenology book soon. Working on been confidence, and self love.
I wish I would have listened to your words when I was 18 years old I'm now 55 and I went through hell my whole life UNTIL now NOT MORE!!!, but I had to go through very abusive relationships which the last one was very violent and almost kill me to realize with who I was dealing with, .... after being raised by a witch narcissistic mother and a cover narcissistic father , my mother passed away two years ago and now, I see who they are and I wish I wouldn't know all this long time ago I would have avoided a lot of headaches thank you for your wise words, I have been in therapy now for 6 months I need help me to see all that you now sharing, ..... I wish young people will listen recognize who they are dealing with, the devil in action !!!! .... and separate from them the sooner they can !!! At least I'm looking at that it's never too late to see the light so I feel blessed even though I'm 55 I still have a long life ahead without abuse knowing now that I'm worth and loved ! Thank you for letting me share 😊
You’re not alone.....my husband had a witch npd mother & narcissistic father.....after much damage he unexpectedly had a fatal heart attack in July ‘18 - undiagnosed heart disease from decades of tremendous stress - his last few years he did emotionally heal a lot & we finally learned about narcissism....he was only 54 & we have 2 beautiful sons that miss him very much
Pastor I was married to a narcissist and did not know. However, you are on point. It had gotten to the point I would call him Adam because he blamed me for everything. He had a victim mentality, a precessional liar. I would constantly become reflective to determine if it was truly me. We could never have a discussion he would keep going until I lost control then he no longer wanted to talk about. I am so glad you are putting this out here, but I wish I had this information when I was married. It’s been 6 years since the divorce and I’m still untangling the corrupt thinking.
This is exactly what I went through w my ex husband and he claimed,to be a man of God. When I put my foot down, and spoke less to him, he panicked. He had cheated on me w other women including his own mother. Even worse then that, he triangulated his whole family on me for yrs stating "the lord said this and that.". He would even say "the lord said he'll destroy u if u leave me." 4 months later, I still haven't been destroyed.
I agree, They have a superior attitude, lack empathy, never take responsibility for their action and they are pathological liars. They are extremely vindictive and you can depend on the hovering after no contact, because the narcissist has the personality and traits of a house fly, they will never stop pestering you until they die.
You are always on point; I can relate to everything you share because I was with a person like this for years. I finally broke away with the guidance of God. I will never go back . It was painful and toxic. I am so glad, God lead me to your channel to keep me educated. Everything you described happened and it's scary. I wasted too many years and it was hard for me to leave, I kept taken him back. I was miserable. I am Free!!!!!!!! Please listen to this Pastor!!!!!!!!!!
I thank God for RUclips. I really do. It may have saved my life. I was 35 when I got involved with a narcissist, and it was so difficult to figure out what I was observing...and almost impossible to explain it to others. It was through the Internet that I was validated. Thank you, Pastor!
Now I know why my husband doesn’t want to go to marriage counseling. He’s afraid I may find out he’s a narcissist. I already knew that anyway. The funniest thing to me about my husband is, he used to send me your videos such as, How to be a good wife. I started listening to the videos and actually loved your teachings. I never heard of RC Blakes until my husband would send me your videos. Well, well, well, I started listening to more videos of yours right until I stumbled a-crossed these narcissist videos. May I say? It has backfired on him. Now I’m learning about him, the narcissist he is…You say you are not a professional on speaking about the narcissist. I beg the differ. Everything you are speaking is touching each one of us. You are speaking the truth. You are lead by the Holy Spirit. You are helping us (the victims of narcissist) You, with Gods help, are giving us strength to get out of these narcissistic abusive relationships. I see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Thank you RC Blakes and thank God for sending you to us. May God continue to bless and keep you…
GREAT teaching. We must realize that we r in constant spiritual warfare against the enemy. The goal of the enemy is to breed more narcissism in the world. If we r hurt by these evil people we have to b careful not to let the hurt and pain of their actions cause us to become bitter people and get caught in the enemy's snare. As u say this is why we have just about a whole culture becoming both victims and culprits for the enemy to use. We must wake up church and overcome this evil on both sides. Thanks and keep educating us on the subject matter!.may God bless
You hit the nail on the head! Everything you said is right on point. I thought I was going crazy! He called me to see if I was in for the night then went to another woman’s house. When I confronted him about it he immediately got defensive, twisted everything around and became the victim. I felt like I needed to apologize for questioning him. Thank you so much for your insight!
Thank You God for anointing pastor, to deliver this message on Narcissist on a biblical stand point. It is well over due. Narcissistic humans leave their victims very broken. I’ve been in a 9 year narcissistic relationship and it mentally, emotionally and physically drained me. They suck the life out of you. I Thank God everyday for rescuing me out of bondage, cause that’s what they do bind you. The song I sang for 1 1/2 years was open my eyes to your heart lord and he did. Now I sing one day at time sweet Jesus and he knows my name by a Tasha Cobbs. Amen.
LL I thank the bank for foreclosing on our house because that's what allowed me to leave and move to an apt with just my 2 kids. Our pastor had got me to agree to support us in the apt but the NAR wouldn't leave the house. By the time the sheriff's dept threw him out God had given me strength and info and I filed for and got a divorce, In 1 month. I'm celebrating. 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉Married 8/1971. Divorced 9/91. I have not remarried, I tell people "I did my time". I picked THAT ONE. There won't ever be another unless God sends, with a label, addressed to me. 🤗
I’m always told I have a evil spirit, when I question him. I wish I had seen this video when it came out. I would have know what I’ve been dealing with all these years. Spirit of confusion.
Nailed It! 😢 I showed my narc one of your videos and got the beating of my life a few weeks ago and now im in run and hide mode. He is a very sick person to say the least. I used to take the beatings and feel sorry 4 him, what a fool i have been, but after years of physical and mental abuse I at least know finally what I am dealing with and it seems to run in my narcs family. They are very scarey people and you're right they always act like the victim. Thanks for sharing the love, I like your videos.💘
Care Berra. You cannot tell a narcissist you're on to them. The information is for you to be aware, not try to remedy the narcissist. Thank God you got away.
This is 100% accurate. I experienced all these narcissist “victim” tactics you described. Having never dealt with this type of warped adult behavior before, I fell in the trap of arguing logic and apologizing for my reactions to problems of his making. Thank you for this clarity that these individuals are impossible. “I know who you are and I’m done”
You have really opened my eyes 👀 a lot... & I can’t thank u enough.I know so many ppl in my family like this & they always have to be right they can never admit they wrongs & they will turn others against you just because they have a problem with you....They even brain 🧠 wash others it so crazy.
Teisha MISUNDERSTOOD What’s sad is that people don’t have the sense to see what they’re doing and just go along with what they say even after they know your character. It’s very painful!
@ Rc Blakes God is using you in such a mighty way👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾someone who might feel like giving up, will listen to this message and rise up emotionally in faith. The Narcissist is a foot soldier used by the enemy ( Satan) to kill, steel and destroy the soul. It was the grace of God that saved me from death. Your videos are very informative breaking the mental, emotional and physiological bondage. God bless you, may your wisdom increase 🙏🏾
This video is INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT!!! You are the first person I have seen make this point. Ever since I found out about Narcissism I have been thinking about how bad they could be in counseling if the counselor is not aware of Narcissism. An uninformed counselor may encourage people to stay together or continue to counsel them through it when that sane one really needs to be told to run from the Narc as fast as possible and not look back.
I have been attracting these type of people for a long time. Get rid of one, and attract another. I have gone through so much depression that I didn't know which way was up. This video made me cry...I mean really cry. Thank you so much for putting this out. THANK YOU SO MUCH.
I am proud to know God lead me to you as my pastor and your wife, as a GOOD role model as a woman in every sense....thank you both for educating us from a biblical stand point......thank you.
When dealing with a narc, you have to do more than just run! YOU MUST PRAY!! Pray for protection, restoration, healing and deliverance!!
I Agree 100%.
Amen 🙏🏾
Amen. In Jesus name.
And Sage those demons away!
Amen to that we need to pray together to expel these demons 🙏
Pastor ......." A narcissist is Never wrong and feel like they never owe anyone an apology" ...this is confirmation.
Thank you.
Anjela Joy
Exactly, they are not accountable for their actions, never wrong ! No empathy or compassion !
1tyuuinnj
Yes
Never ever wrong....never apologizes...wow Pastor you are so right..wow
🔥🔥🔥 yes Lord!
They also think that you are in competition with them. It's best to run. So happy I did. Too much drama and headache.
OMG YES THEY DO
India King yup honey they sho nuff do. Especially when you have good intentions in your heart. These kind of people need to be exposed and voided.
Yes, funny they like to have someone “successful” yet they want the spotlight. My ex didn’t like that I made more money than him. He said it wouldn’t bother him during our dating phase, yet it cams up when we got married.
Amen...I did too run for my life and yes pastor negativity and drama and soon as I saw the false self took him to court for domestic violence bcz he tried to kill me went no contact immediately...blocked him on social media...filed first divorce 3 weeks before final hearing he put someones address in the county I live in and lost money then refiled...yes pastor quicksand...discernment and one step ahead...blindsided because he thought he had a one up on me and yes like you said discarded emotionally first step bcz he thought I was so blinded that he got me real good...in court victory was mine he was uh..uh...no sympathy for the devil...
@Margaret Brown Narcissist get lost!
A narcissist can’t stand to be ignored. 😌 but will give you the silent treatment to get you upset. When it backfires they will try a different more sinister approach.
They sure can't stand to be ignored. Good or bad attention from anyone and preferably everyone. They really are something else and not in a good way but they don't care. Just as long as you are looking at their a** and giving them 190% of your attention every second of every minute of every hour of every day. Someone else pays you attention, ooooh noooo can't have that. Gotta jump up and intercept that one. Go somewhere else to get away from them... we'll get ready for hem to follow, not because they love you or are concerned for your well being, but they see you as a slave or property, and number two, no one else will put up with their sht. I believe since I've been away from my narc, although they've ruined and smeared me to the max and everyone out here, people that have been stuck around them are starting to actually see the real them and what I must have gone through. And they know if they didn't buy friends they wouldn't really have any. I'm just exhausted. And flipped it around to make me look like the narc and sabotaged my life and helped caused me to lose everything, (when usually I 100% believe most times people are responsible for their own mess) but folks are I think finally starting to see... now what I want to know is why I am suffering this "karma" everyone mentions, when this person/persons are so evil to do me this way? Is it wrong for me to want to see them get their "karma" that I am reaping? It's nowhere near fair.
Zee Wash so true!!
Sunshine S
Let vengeance be mine said the Lord! They will reap that which they sow! Leave it alone.
I’m watching it happen to the EX AND HIS MOTHER NOW! And boy are they reaping their own harvest.
Me, I’m content with sitting on the side lines and letting God be God, all by Himself!
Zee Wash indeed
@@sunshines4555 their Karma is their everyday life....
They are empty vessels....have no values, no love and nothing of substance.....I can't be nice to live such a life they are miserable and not lovable people once you figure them out you cant love them and they know it and it kills them
They shut down,and have the emotional maturity of a 5 year old. Thank you pastor Blake's 🕊💜
Or a six year old in a rage when they don't get their own way
Everything he describe happened to me. Especially, the part about how a Narc will go around to everyone at your church, job, friends, & family assassinating your name & character to protect his false image.
Elizabeth Asikpo
Yes they are all textbook its crazy
My mom, who is over 75 yrs old has allowed a narcissist to sleep on her couch for 3 years now. We had a big fall about this man being in the house. Everything you said happens, I mean everything. I don't know what to do to help my mom see that she is dealing with a narcissist I
Yes indeed! This recently happened to me also. I'm just trusting that God will have His way with that nut because the flagrant lies from that pathological lying sociopathic manipulative predatory cheating psychopath were hurtful and beyond indecent. I'm so glad my heart is healed, but it's quite upsetting. Everything Pastor is saying is More than true!
Y would you think it’s ok to do this at church? Oh I guess in their minds making you seem like the bad guy makes them look more like the Christian. I would be so turned off, he wouldn’t even share with me anymore lol.
Yes so true!
My Ex is this way to the fullest. He has done all these things to the fullest. IM still healing from this relationship. It has been the most painful relationship I ever had in my life. I just believe the narcissistic is demonic.
The Narcissist is truly demonic and evil. They don’t have the ability to admit whenever they do something wrong!!! Sweetheart the lord is with you, things will get better with time. Pray for discernment and wisdom. The person who hurt you, doesn’t have empathy, love or cares. The Narcissist is simply used to kill, steel and destroy your joy and self esteem. I couldn’t believe how evil and twisted the Narcissist is. Everyday I thank God for saving my life. Don’t focus on any negative words spoken over your life. The Narc will tell lies accuse you of things you haven’t done. Call you crazy.
God can’t be mocked, the person who hurt you, will give a account to God. Be careful not to get back together with him. Guard your heart and emotions. God will deliver you ❤️
Jasmine Suther stay no contact if you can. You’ll heal faster and your strength, peace and happiness will return sooner rather than later. Be patient with yourself during this healing time and impose intentional self care. All the best.
Currently going through this now and it’s very painful to the point that I’m numbed; I can barley eat.
Jasmine Suther I led him to believe in Christ now it’s just a better cover up for him
Funny how great they are at it
Never EVERRRRR argue with a narc. Folks its a LOSING battle even when u r slapping them with the truth. U will go in circles and all kinds of UNRELATED topics will be dragged in. Its so exhausting. Useless. Professional victim is right. Wow-- GREAT VIDEO
Nubian Khaleesi I wish I knew this years ago before I ended up being smeared all over my church and people stopped talking to me for no reason. I couldn’t figure out what was going on.
No never you want win
This is my life my crazy narc husband
Yes they love to bring up stuff for the past that has nothing to do with the problem at hand
Amen 🙌🏽 u are very right
This scares me. I thought something was wrong with me but this is what they want you to believe. It's damaging to your mind, spirit, and soul. You will need twice the amount of healing from a narcissist than the average person.
L.
I should have a PhD in this subject! The narcissist will starve trying to get any attention from me! I'm not the one! God has given me wisdom in this area! Saying absolutely nothing to them says a lot!!!! They want attention it doesn't matter if it's positive or negative attention! You're dealing with a demon!!!! So, you have to do the opposite of what the enemy is provoking you to do! Life is too short to be in a perpetual state of misery!!!!
Amen. last Sunday I attend service my husband came along sat there I assume he was praying once service was over he went to the package store once home he began to drink his evil sprit after he drank his evil sprit that demon he serves attacked me verbal abuse demonic possession yes he's a narcissist called me ever thing but the child of God. yes he's never wrong he did all the cheating. but always say ing I was cheating which is a lie. talk about church that demon that controls his spritual soul. all that night the things he had and was saying made me sick to my stomach. yes this demon is never wrong. when he fell asleep I pack some things I left that morning while he slept hard and drunk. that demon only went to church with me to blasphemy the sprit of god, he was saying about me you suppose to be a woman of god , he said you ain't shish bitch you ain't know wife you're nothing but a ho. yes he's a waste of my time he just turned 63 Nov 14, Im not going back he's a true demon.
@@cubbiesmith4505 I am praying for you and that you get the healing & freedom you deserve!!!! Seek God without ceasing & go will order your steps! Sending you love,hugs& prayers my beloved!!!!
+Diannah Minefee Thank you never mentioned ten years abuse to any of my family the only one i had was my sister she passd on two years now. I married this demon age 50 first marriage I didn't know what I've learned only a year ago today, 60 this April pass discarded this nightmare created molded by lucifer himself anything to blasphem the love of thee almighty god.
Thank you, Amen.
I should have PhD now as well and become a lawyer those that need to fight these demons in court.
When I found out what he was I was like Wow! Wow! Wow!
And then I ran💃💃💃 AND I RAN FAST!.
😂😂😂😂😂 at the ran fast part, good for you!!
Sherry Shay Good for you!👏👏👏👏👏
Same here 🙌
Wow. I Could do the same!...am doing the same. It's hard after many years. Hope you're doing better than ever!
We are supposed to pray for them. Then its time to move on.
The narc would intentionally cause you emotional pain. When you confront them causing you to go off on them, they'll sit there in silence and watch you have an emotional breakdown.
my supervisor did this just evil
This has happened to me several times , they sit back and act like they didn’t do anything so I can feel bad. It’s so sad😢😢
Very true
Circular conversations from hell .... your speaking to an emotionally arrested toddler in an adult body .... don’t waste your time.
Run 🏃♀️!!!!!!!!!
they also do good deeds when they want something in return
Yes they do going through this right now
@@elizabethabuhaija9706 I'm sorry but what i did was started making him not like being around me. Not talking to him, always having an attitude...things like that. Just be the total opposite of who you really are and this should help. Godspeed
@@babydoll5396 thank you I will take your advice I'm really glad to hear that I wasn't the only good woman was going through this I felt like I was alone thank you sweetie God bless you
Oh yeah, the strings attached with their “gifts and favors” will strangle you.
They are do gooders cause they trying to offset their karma
yes pastor, I went through thiS with a man for seven in half years, he always lied, cheat, used me, I was like his slave. always talk about me, saying always my fault, then I pray to God and God open my eyes when I got sick, my heart went 220 beats per minute, I felt I was dying the doctor had to give meds to slow my heart, that was my wake up call, then I left him it's been a year, I went no contact and I'm free and happy, going to church, my life change to the better, now I do things I never did before and now I know my worth.
Diana Lorenzi amen 🙏🏾👏🏾we made it 🤗
*I SURVIVED*
*I'M FREE*
*I MADE IT TOO*
I have the same story except I was with mine 8 years and my body started giving me signs it was time to leave. My immune system broke down I was constantly tired because I was stressed. My muscles tensed I couldn't sleep. Once my doctor put me on muscle relaxers I knew it was time to move on and I did. My strength and faith in God is saving me. I feel blessed everyday.
Timberly Davis your story sounds like mines. I was with mines for 8 1/2 years and I started to get sick physically aswell.
Jane Knose. Yes narcs will destroy your health.
Sometimes you have to move in silence.
Yes..So true.
Always move in silence 😎💯
Yes I moved out while he was at work...I'm almost one year free...it feels so good
Thats really, cuz a they are or capable of killing
@@vondawilliams6260 im happy for u
The Narcissist has many personalities negativity, they cover up all things, is your fault never theirs, they play victim to often! And, the things they say about you to other ppl is just unreal is painful to deal with a narcissist dealt with one for 20 years! They're evil! They are sure actors! You'll never get closure to your pain with a narcissist or anything for that matter!
Legion said, for we are many. Demons
They will copy and steal your identity. From your vehicle to your workouts your hobbies to having their new supply buy and do things you have or do. They are really strange and sad individuals. If you discard one, they will try to punish you for life and try to make you so jealous of the things they are doing. Ignore one and you’ll see strange behavior too. I feel that they were emotionally neglected in their childhood and left alone a lot to run around without boundaries, which is one reason why they hate boundaries and love to push on them. They grow up(well not really) and run circles around you and drive you nuts. Confusion tactics. Spin artist.
But they are the friendliness and most happy people you’ll meet. It’s all FAKE.
Ok there I got my vent out. Thanks RC!
Yup after my narcissist left the chicks were all trying to have twins like me, 1 was from ny like me as well and wore wedge sandals like me, they must of told these chicks what I do.
The sad part is they are so delusional and living in their own world even when you tell a narcissist about themselves they don't believe it. My ex used to laugh when I brought it up to him, like I would pull his characteristics out of thin air.
You are right. You are smart. God bless you!!
Not just religion pastor! Look at our government, politicians and most CEOS... most of them are narcissist and our society rewards these behaviors and seen them as leader-like...
Milka yes they crave positions of influence and control ... the overt ones. The covert ones seek positions of trust where they operate unsuspected. Pastor , youth group leader , teacher, babysitter, firefighter, school bus driver, school counselor, baseball coach and helpful handyman fixing stuff . They fit someplace in the community where they get respect and don’t arouse suspicion. They are staging things early on so they can do bad things - and when you expose them nobody believes you. They say you are crazy. You are isolated with no support ...that’s what they want and engineer the whole thing too slowly for you to detect. . Cloaked in kindness and gifts and generosity. They use everything. They are very patient and pretend when the payoff is high enough . It’s actually scary. My ex wore Disney sweatshirts, lifeguard shirts , firefighter shirts and security guard shirts . He was none of these professions. Like Pastor Blakes said in an earlier video ... CAMOUFLAGE TO MAKE PREY FEEL COMFORTABLE IN A LIFE THREATENING SITUATION
He can relate because he is a pastor so he sees it in the church...
Pastor I am being gaslighted for 2.9 years GOD made me mentally strong to see it to the end and GOD was in the middle...No contact instituted that immediately from taking him to court keeps stalking/breaking into my home last breakin end September stealing jewelry...personal belongings...1 yr 2 months no contact..3.5 months divorced and demon/devil will not leave me alone devil from hell...satan in its entirety..tried to kill me for a gc and to obtain my assets...to learn.. understand..be knowledgeable and aware of lucifer...
Dtella55 please be safe. Move if you can. Get a dog, video Surveillance, an alarm , or a gun or pepper spray .
my ex stole some of my things too ... and I think the reason was to keep me in anxiety so I couldn’t focus on my work (my income and my reputation) and s reason for me to “keep coming back to him” in communication begging for my things, which he locked 🔒 down in his own self storage unit (he couldn’t keep a job in Northern Virginia when he moved here and was evicted and homeless sleeping in his car , doing Craigslist handyman tasks and had stuff in self storage unit). I wanted so much to break into that unit and get MY stuff but get who would have gotten in trouble and look like the thief? Me. Unbelievable how they stage you to look like exactly and incorrectly who they actually are. They try to drive you insane so they can blame you . At the end of my relationship I felt he would have loved me to kill my self so he could run off with all my nice things because he had nothing but his clothes and tools . When you tell people this stuff , you sound crazy but thank god Pastor Blakes understands its the narcissist who is crazy - it’s a disorder in the DSM. And when we reveal what they do , we sound crazy . Get out . Don’t dare. Heal. . Seek peace and rediscover who you once were . The videos on RUclips will give you intellectual closure on what really happened .
Milka You’re very correct girl. They’re all over the show!🙉
I've been dealing with a narcissist for 4 years. I have finally gotten the strength to walk away. They are toxic individuals and will suck the life out of you. They thrive off drama and will make you feel like you are crazy when in reality they are! They have a good way of reeling you back in when they sense you are done so go NO CONTACT and move on. I felt like my life had been on hold for 4 years waiting for him to change but narcissist NEVER change.
Omg yes...
Absolute true. 👍🏾
Point blank- PERIOD
Very happy for you
Love you
Sing it sister ❤
They also try to "one up" on someone and copy everything a person does: clothing, buying the same care or product, etc.
YES!
Fact's
Yesssss!!!!
Always
Been married 17 years to my narcissist "pastor" husband. So much heartache and drama. God just opened the for me and my kids to leave and I am so grateful. You are nailing this Pastor. Keep teaching!
Very clear & very true:
"Never argue with a narcissist!!"
Lol! "You have a cold; they have cancer. " So true...
Yes I will mention a challenge i am experiencing and he will dismiss my feelings and bring the attention on himself guilt tripping that i complain too much and that if he had been in my shoes he would be better off. Today i can see the pathological envy and jealously.
🤣🤣🤣
Hey Pastor Blakes - I’ve been married to a narcissist for 15yrs. And even though I always knew something was wrong with my husband, I never knew it had a name. Found out through marriage counseling for his serial cheating. I now have been separated from him for over a yr and have started divorce proceedings and it has been sooo interesting how my husband has done the very things you described. It’s been so interesting how some of my church family has taken his side (to include my pastor) and turned on me. But because we still attend the same church I’ve been quieter than a church mouse in this whole ordeal. And my silence has been the BEST thing that I’ve ever done. I have refused to speak to him in any setting and am letting God speak for me. I will say this: being married to this toxic person has brought me nearer to God I’m so many ways. And since I’m a glass half full kinda girl, thats one of the lessons that I’ve learned. Thank you for your ministry!!!
Same. But we have 3 children one is grown but two little boys also. Co-parenting is a nightmare
I don't understand how the pastor could turn on you. Sounds like your in the wrong 'church ' Jesus was clear that adultery is grounds for divorce. Paul even said a man must love his wife like Christ loves the church.
Narcs are demonized, but the Power of the Holy Spirit through prayer will you deal them such a blow that they’ll never know what hit them. Do what you need to do to protect yourself and then step aside and allow God to do what He ONLY can do, and dealing with the narc is part of that. He’s done it before! E.g, David in the Bible was delivered from narcissistic Saul, Abigail 1Sam 25: delivered from Narcissistic husband Nabal.
Joseph also had an encounter with pathopha
AMEN ! Let go and let GOD!!!!!
Pastor Blakes, I thank you for bringing the Narcissist to life from a Biblical perspective.
You're so right about a narcissist. Stay away and don't let them know that you are discerning them. They are dangerous.
RC Blakes is right. More counselors need to learn how to recognize a narcissist.
They rarely go to counseling, it's normally the victims that do
You might not be a professional psychologist, but you are anointed by God and educating yourself. Together, and with your gifting from God, these videos are golden. Don't stop what you are doing. You are helping and will help many people. I study all personality disorders and read about them constantly and there is a way of communicating you have that is real, specific and very impactful. thank you.
Research covert narcissism, they are worse than overt. Thank you for digging into this from a biblical perspective.
Brenda Mathis. Yes they are cause they're harder to recognize.
Yes, I agree. I’ve discovered that my spouse is a covert narcissist...Very hard to detect but when I started to research his behaviors and antics and I stumbled across narcissistic traits...I’ve been with this person for a very long time until I’ve discovered is true self. Now the mask has come completely off and his very “true colors” have been highlighted...
You're so right 💯
That's how you know it's narcissist say NO to them or try to DISAGREE then the mask falls
Look. 7k+ listeners in 24 hours. THAT'S how many people are trying to figure out how to deal with this phenomenon. SO grateful Pastor RC is also SO Into trying to figure this thing out.
Narcs have no position until you give them a position. So don't give them one!👏👏👏
Actually, some CN will apologize but is it the coldest apology on the planet. These immoral monsters are not capable of empathy. Everything is the victims fault, and this thing will continue to make excuses for their sad behavior. These immoral monsters will not change, but are full of excuses. We must continue to pray and stay NO CONTACT with these demons.
That's it! The lies about their finance , how needy they are, ooohhh they're gonna die tomorrow... Attention seeking at its best!
Also, narcs are oftentimes codependents. This only confuses the matter all the more. They need your approval and they don't. They want the recognition and demand the attention while detaching from you to cause you pain. They are oftentimes borderline as well. All of which, becomes the life of the partner. Best tool is NO CONTACT, prayer, regaining your friendships away from them, separating social lives, finding healthy habits and hobbies, SEEK PROFESSIONAL guidance and SPEAK UP!
❤❤❤
Always speak up,speak up. They are just people who are going no where,and don't want you to.
This is SO IMPORTANT! I've dealt with malignant narcs but wasn't prepared to recognize a deflated, borderline, covert spiritual narc! 2 years of madness and I'm looking back like, THAT'S why?! Is all starting to make sense after years of confusion, now working on building myself up spiritually to defend against these attacks
This is also your child sadly
@@jdouce6074 ..i'm confused as to who's child?
Wow I thought the same thing about a narcissist. The devil knows who to send.
Soooo true!!! I didn’t know WHAT I was dealing with. Demonic! He tried to mentally and emotionally assassinate me. Messing up my sleep and had me crying all the time. I was trying harder to please him.
I agree with the majority of this message but narcissists also withhold thanks and praise as punishment. Dealing with someone who never says thanks for a delicious meal or never will give a compliment is soul rending.
Correct. They'll never acknowledge you & will discount you until you break. Nothing you do is ever good enough.
I have a narcissistic mother & ex who have never apologized. They are emotionally & mentally abusive but use God's word for people to treat them right but you don't see the Word resonating in their own lives. Both of them are/were thankless. (My ex killed himself.) I bought my mom a car when she was catching the bus & she gave it away! I supported my ex when he didnt have a job & he cheated, opened sex accounts, used coke when I wasnt home & when I became pregnant, wished death on myself & our baby girl. Now that I've stopped trying to please these people, I'm the bad guy. Their opinions & feelings don't matter anymore. I now see the way they move & let them know they cannot take advantage of me nor do I believe what they say. I play head games with them by talking about narcs & the look on their faces is priceless. I laugh. You can't trust narcs. Some of them are purely evil & want to see your demise. I've experienced it.
Exactly...100 run for your life!
My ex narc used to Always Always compare my cooking to his Mom and Grandma cooking. And how even people in the hospital wouldn't eat it.all the while eating dinner with no problem. I got tired of the whining and complaints I told him to fix his own meals. So he'd Buy quick meals Very Unhealthy food as well. No care for my health. Knowing I had high chlosterol 😫
Ms Q you are speaking exactly what my life us. My mom and hubby whom ive been with 20 yrs married 6 1/2. Im so tire and broken...and now getting to the place to rebuild myself to move on. Its my sons senior yr so trying to hang on. He convienced me to go back to being an at home wife and mother...now he is financially controlling to on top of all else...i have several chronic illnesses and he just maked them worse...
@@Godis4me1978 Hi. Please leave him. Find a job & leave. Look for resources within your state. They are diabolical. You cannot heal fully until you break away from their grip. I'm sorry you're going through this. They feed off your misery. They are dark & sick souls & ruled by evil. If you're able to get a job online, do it. Save your $.
My ex tried to get me to move states away with him while treating me badly & telling me at the same time that if it didn't work, I'll be homeless with my son because he'd take our daughter. They are strategic with everything they do. Nothing is a mistake! Love to you.
Yes, silence is golden. Be, quiet. Serenity Prayer for sure!
Dealing with a Narcissist is so exhausting. I really value these videos and the Christian wisdom alongside is so helpful.
I call it the ‘One-Up’ dealing with people who have NPD, there is always a ONE UP!
PaulinaJohnson MBA Can you explain?
Jane Knose people who always have to express something over you, if you express to a narcissist you achieved something, they will say they achieved something greater or know someone else who has achieved something greater. You say you have a headache,they say how they have a headache, stomach ache, and toothache. Always ‘One-Up’ on you.
PaulinaJohnson MBA my experience he would compare me to others and say they are doing better than me! I would tell him I was thought never to be jealous of other, because we never know what someone does to obtain what they have! For certain a narcissist "acts" as if they have amnesia. I have dealt with this, especially when I have done things for him as well to help him! They only care about "self" from what I see! They love exploiting others for there resources!
They secretly envy you and wish to take your place, but they are very patient and clever. They will wait until you are in a weak state then try to pounce on you or ONE UP you. They do this by stealing all of your energy, ideas and image and use it against you. Or by withholding any help to you or the relationship/Friendship etc, and storing it all up for themselves. They like to win people over over you. It's weird how they do this. Almost unexplainable.
Yes!!! That anything you can do I can do better syndrome .. it’s sad
Your right on Pastor, it’s really a demonic force that leads these persons. Once you know who they are run 🏃🏾♀️
Far and fast..truly demonic individuals
I am 10min in on this video and you are right on the head about my issues with my husband!!! OMG!!!! 8yrs and I am still enduring this!!!!!
And they will say ur judging them when u call them on it
I thank God all the time that I got out of that toxic situation!!! Narcissism is a spirit that will destroy your life!
He stopped giving and now I don’t GIVE him the time of day. He’s gone and I want him to stay GONE where clowns 🤡 go for good!
Pastor , thought you said that was not an EXPERT ?!?! You hit that nail all up in the head !
I spent 5 out 7 days of the week trying to dodge them firey darts of accusations !
You are helping people , please do not stop !!!!
One reason why narcs need the recognition is because it satisfies that little kid inside. Mine use to overly praise me because its what he actually needed me to do for him in return. If I didn't, he would remind me of all that he did for me. It made me furious to HAVE TO KEEP UP with this behavior. The things he did were normal things that people in relationships, do. But he needed the recognition badly. I started telling him that his "9yr old self" needed my attention. That's when I knew it was over.
Im laughing but this is sad! I was the reason he cheated, I was the reason his business failed, I was lazy when he lost it all, I was the reason his life is upside down. "I MIGHT AS WELL JUST DIE! IM BETTER OFF DEAD! IF I STAY WITH YOU, I'LL BE DEAD BY 40" ---Well sir, if im the cause of all of this.. let me exit. Funny thing is your life got even worse after I was gone.
Eye opening video. I've been with a few of these. I'm working on myself so I won't be deceived again. Thank you so much!
Yvette Loshaw
Jesus ..!! How did you manage that ? A few???? I have only met one and that’s all it took to open my eyes ... Glad you figured it out ... Blessings !!!
On point brother ! I was married to a person just like your describing for 28 years . 27 years of fakeness and me being the bad guy . I'm blessed being able to escape this demon. I'm so thankful for JESUS grace and mercy. God bless you and your family Pastor.
I broke free from the Demon known as Narc … 3 years of Torture …. 12 days of no contact Thank You Jesus 🕊
Discernment is key. Listen to the Lord when he is speaking to you. In most cases, if you're not trying to date the narcissist you can hear the lies coming out of their mouth. And when you do, RUN!
So true!! They play the victim role (it's never them, never apologize and have zero regard for your feelings), and it's all about their status & reputation. Thank you, Bishop. You tell it as it is. God bless you. 🙏
🎯💯
And if you pay close attention to them you will see right threw them 4 yrs Narc Free🙏🏾
I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS PHRASE “professional victim” LOL😁
No one is beyond saving from the power of Jesus...why don't I hear anything about Jesus and his delivery from demonic spirits. Jesus is still in control.
Because the NARC will have to humble themselves and pray for forgiveness, and turn away from their wicked ways. PRIDE is one of the key sins that will keep a NARC from having the humility to seek forgiveness and deliverance. Jesus will not force himself on anyone. The sinner must repent. You will note one here hundreds of posts where people have said "...and they never admit they're wrong!"
I cannot thank you enough, Pastor Blakes. You are ABSOLUTELY right on!! They love drama. If a person wants to have a peaceful life, there is no room for the narcissist! I had a narcissistic pastor husband for 4 decades. Back then, nobody even talked about narcissism. In time, God sorted it out, and I have been free from him for 8 years. You are so correct!! Always one- upping. They are everywhere! Now I recognize it in other family members. All truth, my brother!!!!
Thank you Pastor Blake. You saved me from a relationship that I should have never been in. I thank God for you.
They say they’re sorry sometimes, but that sorry is fake and just a means to an end. Their behavior conflicts with their apologies
Yes Lord, preach!! I had to allow this individual I was involved with think it was his idea to leave me. But I thank God he gave me wisdom to see it was better to make it be his idea then I would never have to deal with him again.
This was exactly how I handled the situation! 😉 (After figuring out the insane levels of attempts at hoovering..) they can’t take rejection.. have to be smarter & push all of their buttons at THE same time.
SOCIETAL NARCISSISM IS RAMPANT TODAY EVERYWHERE. I had to leave my job bc of this. It was making me sick bc I was being targeted.
Married to a narcissist and now filed for divorce and separated from this man however is now playing the victim and doing everything in his power to discredit me by using my own children. God help me. Ps Blakes so on point
I just got of a relationship with this type of sick individual. You speak nothing but the truth!! Once you wake up and realize run and stay gone for good!
They know right from wrong because if we treated them, like they treat us they'd go offfff.. I peep it all, I'll leave the person alone fast.
So true just broke up with one. I could never have feelings, always placed in a space of understanding - believing his thoughts. Had headaches DAILY!
Thank you. As Christians, we have to learn to reconcile and admit wrong. Problem is is that accountability is lacking
I'm being treated for narcissistic abuse traumatic disorder and even my psychiatrist can't answer this. I'm hoping someone here can, why and how does the brain of a narcissist operate did they all have the same modus operandi? They all act exactly the same what triggers the brain to cause this to happen? It's like they all use the same Playbook, the exact same Playbook and they don't know each other because they don't want the competition so how does this happen? Also you're not kidding about being dangerous every time I try to leave mine he tries to kill me. He burnt my house down with me in it the first time I filed for divorce. We are separated now and I am working through the divorce please pray for me.
The demon attached to or operating from within the narcissist is of satan and they are uploaded with his playbook strategy.
This Rabbit hole runs very deep, this thing called Narcissism. It truly made me look at my own narcissism and ask the question if I am the narcissist. Craziness embodied.
Holly Cook. If you asked more than likely, you're not. Most narcs think they're fine. We all some sone degree of narcissism but the lack of empathy is whats considered narcissism.
La Locks I agree. That is the insidious nature of these relationships between an empath and a narcissist. Isn’t it interesting that the fix for the empath is boundary development and subsequent enforcement. This boundary formation is then the very thing that is “pointed-out” as a “narcissistic” defect in the empath. Of course that is the error in thought process for some, and at one time myself.
Holly Cook. Yes, is strange I have been around narcissist a great deal but wasnt made aware of it until my last relationship. They are sick people. Isnt it amazing that healing ourselves is what repels them?
You're not alone!
I sometimes thought I was a narc, only because hou I was treated by the narc. I started giving him the same treatment he gave me. I no now that I am one of God's children and always was.
Ah, projection. The fine art of making me guilty of your vices. No one projects better or more frequently than a narcissist. They’ve practiced, honed and refined projection to a fine art.
Whatever they’re up to, by some mental “abracadabra,” suddenly they’re innocent and you’re actually the one up to no-good. I would argue this shows how deeply and profoundly narcissists believe in right VS wrong.
If they don’t know right from wrong, why project?
If they don’t care about right vs wrong, why project?
If they don’t have a functioning conscience, why project?
It could be for expediency. To avoid the ramifications of their actions. To keep the smooth sailing going.
But, how would they know what needed to be projected, if they don’t know right from wrong?
They know, oh, how they know! And therein is their undoing.
Guilt? Maybe. Envy of other’s innocence? Perhaps.
Avoidance of the result of wrong-doing? Now we’re getting somewhere.
The need to be perfect! Bingo + all of the above.
Gotta protect that fragile little ol’ ego, y’know.
This is so true. Lord help the Narcissist. They need JESUS. Lol I think some of them have a demon in them. They truly believe they are never wrong. Thank you for your teaching we need to know this.
It's definitely demonic, I've seen when the eye's go completely black.
Thank you my brother it's like you're describing my life. I left my husband of 16 years couple of months ago. I did not know any about narcissist until I began explaining to my manager about how I have been treated for years. I felt like I couldn't never used my own thoughts. I have been loosing myself. Pastor thank you. I have watched many of your videos. Will purchase the Queenology book soon. Working on been confidence, and self love.
yrlnnjulsaint amen glad u came out 🙏🏾🤞🏽
yrlnnjulsaint same here, I found out in marital therapy. When I learned he could not change, I knew it was over!!
'"STAY STRONG AND IN PRAYER SISTER..WITH GOOD SUPPORT SYSTEM AND GOD WILL EXPOSE HIM AND BE YOUR VINDICATOR"💯💯💯💜💜💜⚘⚘⚘💎💎💎
I RECOMMEND ASSOC DIRECT@youtube..... MY GOD...... seriously.
Good for you 🤗🙏
I wish I would have listened to your words when I was 18 years old I'm now 55 and I went through hell my whole life UNTIL now NOT MORE!!!, but I had to go through very abusive relationships which the last one was very violent and almost kill me to realize with who I was dealing with, .... after being raised by a witch narcissistic mother and a cover narcissistic father , my mother passed away two years ago and now, I see who they are and I wish I wouldn't know all this long time ago I would have avoided a lot of headaches thank you for your wise words, I have been in therapy now for 6 months I need help me to see all that you now sharing, ..... I wish young people will listen recognize who they are dealing with, the devil in action !!!! .... and separate from them the sooner they can !!!
At least I'm looking at that it's never too late to see the light so I feel blessed even though I'm 55 I still have a long life ahead without abuse knowing now that I'm worth and loved ! Thank you for letting me share 😊
You’re not alone.....my husband had a witch npd mother & narcissistic father.....after much damage he unexpectedly had a fatal heart attack in July ‘18 - undiagnosed heart disease from decades of tremendous stress - his last few years he did emotionally heal a lot & we finally learned about narcissism....he was only 54 & we have 2 beautiful sons that miss him very much
Pastor I was married to a narcissist and did not know. However, you are on point. It had gotten to the point I would call him Adam because he blamed me for everything. He had a victim mentality, a precessional liar. I would constantly become reflective to determine if it was truly me. We could never have a discussion he would keep going until I lost control then he no longer wanted to talk about. I am so glad you are putting this out here, but I wish I had this information when I was married. It’s been 6 years since the divorce and I’m still untangling the corrupt thinking.
We are always wrong for calling them out on their stuff.
This is exactly what I went through w my ex husband and he claimed,to be a man of God. When I put my foot down, and spoke less to him, he panicked. He had cheated on me w other women including his own mother. Even worse then that, he triangulated his whole family on me for yrs stating "the lord said this and that.". He would even say "the lord said he'll destroy u if u leave me." 4 months later, I still haven't been destroyed.
Amen Sis. Checking in!!! All is well!
Wow! His mother?? Sick and twisted!
Did I hear that correctly? Cheated with other women? As well as his mother? I’m sorry and confused no disrespect at all
they are everywhere, this has thought alot. my eyes are open. THANKYOU JESUS......
I agree, They have a superior attitude, lack empathy, never take responsibility for their action and they are pathological liars. They are extremely vindictive and you can depend on the hovering after no contact, because the narcissist has the personality and traits of a house fly, they will never stop pestering you until they die.
You are always on point; I can relate to everything you share because I was with a person like this for years. I finally broke away with the guidance of God. I will never go back . It was painful and toxic. I am so glad, God lead me to your channel to keep me educated. Everything you described happened and it's scary. I wasted too many years and it was hard for me to leave, I kept taken him back. I was miserable. I am Free!!!!!!!! Please listen to this Pastor!!!!!!!!!!
I thank God for RUclips. I really do. It may have saved my life. I was 35 when I got involved with a narcissist, and it was so difficult to figure out what I was observing...and almost impossible to explain it to others. It was through the Internet that I was validated. Thank you, Pastor!
Now I know why my husband doesn’t want to go to marriage counseling. He’s afraid I may find out he’s a narcissist. I already knew that anyway. The funniest thing to me about my husband is, he used to send me your videos such as, How to be a good wife. I started listening to the videos and actually loved your teachings. I never heard of RC Blakes until my husband would send me your videos. Well, well, well, I started listening to more videos of yours right until I stumbled a-crossed these narcissist videos. May I say? It has backfired on him. Now I’m learning about him, the narcissist he is…You say you are not a professional on speaking about the narcissist. I beg the differ. Everything you are speaking is touching each one of us. You are speaking the truth. You are lead by the Holy Spirit. You are helping us (the victims of narcissist) You, with Gods help, are giving us strength to get out of these narcissistic abusive relationships. I see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Thank you RC Blakes and thank God for sending you to us. May God continue to bless and keep you…
GREAT teaching. We must realize that we r in constant spiritual warfare against the enemy. The goal of the enemy is to breed more narcissism in the world. If we r hurt by these evil people we have to b careful not to let the hurt and pain of their actions cause us to become bitter people and get caught in the enemy's snare. As u say this is why we have just about a whole culture becoming both victims and culprits for the enemy to use. We must wake up church and overcome this evil on both sides. Thanks and keep educating us on the subject matter!.may God bless
Makes sense. They are projecting. They say we have victem mentality. We play the victem. We are just mirroring how they truly feel.
You hit the nail on the head! Everything you said is right on point. I thought I was going crazy! He called me to see if I was in for the night then went to another woman’s house. When I confronted him about it he immediately got defensive, twisted everything around and became the victim. I felt like I needed to apologize for questioning him. Thank you so much for your insight!
Thank You God for anointing pastor, to deliver this message on Narcissist on a biblical stand point. It is well over due. Narcissistic humans leave their victims very broken. I’ve been in a 9 year narcissistic relationship and it mentally, emotionally and physically drained me. They suck the life out of you. I Thank God everyday for rescuing me out of bondage, cause that’s what they do bind you. The song I sang for 1 1/2 years was open my eyes to your heart lord and he did. Now I sing one day at time sweet Jesus and he knows my name by a Tasha Cobbs. Amen.
LL I thank the bank for foreclosing on our house because that's what allowed me to leave and move to an apt with just my 2 kids. Our pastor had got me to agree to support us in the apt but the NAR wouldn't leave the house. By the time the sheriff's dept threw him out God had given me strength and info and I filed for and got a divorce, In 1 month.
I'm celebrating. 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉Married 8/1971. Divorced 9/91. I have not remarried, I tell people "I did my time". I picked THAT ONE. There won't ever be another unless God sends, with a label, addressed to me. 🤗
I’m always told I have a evil spirit, when I question him.
I wish I had seen this video when it came out. I would have know what I’ve been dealing with all these years. Spirit of confusion.
Nailed It! 😢 I showed my narc one of your videos and got the beating of my life a few weeks ago and now im in run and hide mode. He is a very sick person to say the least. I used to take the beatings and feel sorry 4 him, what a fool i have been, but after years of physical and mental abuse I at least know finally what I am dealing with and it seems to run in my narcs family. They are very scarey people and you're right they always act like the victim. Thanks for sharing the love, I like your videos.💘
OMG
I hope you have help and have family around you love.
I thank God that you are alive AND no longer under this devil’s stronghold. Sending you love and support through this period of healing.🤗❤️🤗
Care Berra. You cannot tell a narcissist you're on to them. The information is for you to be aware, not try to remedy the narcissist. Thank God you got away.
I PRAY for you. You've got a lot of HEALING ahead.
This is 100% accurate. I experienced all these narcissist “victim” tactics you described. Having never dealt with this type of warped adult behavior before, I fell in the trap of arguing logic and apologizing for my reactions to problems of his making. Thank you for this clarity that these individuals are impossible.
“I know who you are and I’m done”
This describes my Narcissist husband to a Tee
You have really opened my eyes 👀 a lot... & I can’t thank u enough.I know so many ppl in my family like this & they always have to be right they can never admit they wrongs & they will turn others against you just because they have a problem with you....They even brain 🧠 wash others it so crazy.
Teisha MISUNDERSTOOD What’s sad is that people don’t have the sense to see what they’re doing and just go along with what they say even after they know your character. It’s very painful!
The narc turned all my neighbors against me and he stands outside everyday chatting and laughing with them.
My father and step mom are narsasits and I agree with every thing u spoke on thank u
Excellent validation of what I walked thru with this type of person.
@ Rc Blakes God is using you in such a mighty way👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾someone who might feel like giving up, will listen to this message and rise up emotionally in faith. The Narcissist is a foot soldier used by the enemy ( Satan) to kill, steel and destroy the soul. It was the grace of God that saved me from death. Your videos are very informative breaking the mental, emotional and physiological bondage. God bless you, may your wisdom increase 🙏🏾
This video is INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT!!! You are the first person I have seen make this point. Ever since I found out about Narcissism I have been thinking about how bad they could be in counseling if the counselor is not aware of Narcissism. An uninformed counselor may encourage people to stay together or continue to counsel them through it when that sane one really needs to be told to run from the Narc as fast as possible and not look back.
I have been attracting these type of people for a long time. Get rid of one, and attract another. I have gone through so much depression that I didn't know which way was up. This video made me cry...I mean really cry. Thank you so much for putting this out. THANK YOU SO MUCH.
The title is sooooo on point! 🎯 I’m incredibly grateful to have found someone who can tackle this from a biblical/spiritual aspect. 🙌🏽
Yes, thats what the Holy Spirit gave me. when they accuse you ,Its the language of Lucifer.
Yes!
I am proud to know God lead me to you as my pastor and your wife, as a GOOD role model as a woman in every sense....thank you both for educating us from a biblical stand point......thank you.