Thank you for sharing this. I hope it helps me to focus in on what I need to do to fight for my marriage. This gave me more insight into her mind and gave me words for myself that I didn't think I had.
I absolutely appreciate someone of your age and wisdom understanding that we weren't taught... I wish I knew these things when I got married... I had to go back to the principles of why we feel in love and what made us want to get married... Were working on getting back to that because bad advice nurtured a toxic, self and Godless marriage...
I am going through this exact situation. It’s led me to be resentful and angry. My wife doesn’t want to talk about our issues. She has even gaslighted me into believing that these problems aren’t occurring. How do you talk to someone who puts up a wall and immediately shuts you down? I’m at a loss here. I’ve mentioned counseling but that doesn’t usually go over well. I don’t know what to do, any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for this enlightening video.
You should preface that this makes sense IF there’s not pornography or any other addictions. Otherwise this is just a video about how to blame the victim.
You are so wrong! Until we learn how to learn to love unconditionally we are going to bounce from one crazy to another. If your husband is using porn it is not your fault, I never blame, but you can still get his interest back by learning how to love unconditionally. And before you say you did, you should know that if you had (again I am not blaming you for that, either, we are not taught) he would have zero interest in anything but you.
@@TheMarriageFoundation the assumptions that the unconditional love isn’t what has been there is completely non-validating. At what point is it on him to deal with what has changed him? All I’m saying is when someone is checking into why is my husband losing interest, the first checks should be what is HE doing that is different. Not immediately go into the woman who has been giving and loving for 10 years to stop her “complaining.”
Your views are conventional but they simply do not work for anything other than to justify one's own mundane reactions. I validate those who seek to heal their marriages by doing what works, including self-scrutiny and opening their heart. I find it is distracting to blame one's partner for being flawed, not a marriage-helping position. Using my processes work so many love them. It is okay for you to reject what I teach but you would do better to listen with an open mind. You can heal your marriage if that is what you want, to get him to love you, again..
@@TheMarriageFoundation for any woman out there who has noticed their husband is different and being distant and who is getting g denied and gaslighted about what they know is something, please read Dr. Romani’s book “It’s not you.” You probably have a gift of discernment and just dont have sufficient evidence. He is most likely engaged in some sort of adulterous behavior like looking at porn, an emotional affair, even a physical affair or on the down low. He will deny for years that it’s you who is crazy. Say,”you don’t have to change but I’m not going to stay and continue accepting this.” You have to set boundaries. You simply can’t unconditionally love away the behaviors.
If he wants her to stay the same he shouldn’t marry her … she loses interest too … bored from being taken for granted… weight gain … no libido ..same clothes same joyless obligatory sex … in the same position… same place … predictable.. no spontaneity… no romance 🥰 kids in laws work and life
@@TheMarriageFoundation absolutely which most are ! Marriage is for the benefit of men … health wise they win .. can’t argue with the numbers .. and my lived experience as a clinician marriage like most institutions was created for the benefit of men under patriarchy… it is what it is … women were not allowed to have credit own homes or jobs until less than 100 years ago ! So stop the cap 🧢!
Yeah, I just tell husbands these days to rather focus on anything but sex. As soon as a man needs sex, he is going to have trouble for the rest of his life.
Are you a marriage counselor?? You need to look more deeply into our programs and change yyour thinking based on truth and what works. themarriagefoundation.org/reviews/
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Thank you Paul and The Marriage Foundation for your reminders. God bless
very good advice👏👏👏thank you so much!!! I have been married to my husband for 26 years and agree so much with your advice.❤
Thank you for sharing this. I hope it helps me to focus in on what I need to do to fight for my marriage. This gave me more insight into her mind and gave me words for myself that I didn't think I had.
It sounds like you might need more. Look into the course for men. It is a real life changer! themarriagefoundation.org/reviews/
I absolutely appreciate someone of your age and wisdom understanding that we weren't taught... I wish I knew these things when I got married... I had to go back to the principles of why we feel in love and what made us want to get married... Were working on getting back to that because bad advice nurtured a toxic, self and Godless marriage...
❤ Great facts you just said Sir...🙏
I am going through this exact situation. It’s led me to be resentful and angry. My wife doesn’t want to talk about our issues. She has even gaslighted me into believing that these problems aren’t occurring. How do you talk to someone who puts up a wall and immediately shuts you down? I’m at a loss here. I’ve mentioned counseling but that doesn’t usually go over well. I don’t know what to do, any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for this enlightening video.
My late husband and I were married. 52 years..He died 4. Years ago this coming August.
God bless you both 🙏
Thanks for your advice, very helpful
You should preface that this makes sense IF there’s not pornography or any other addictions. Otherwise this is just a video about how to blame the victim.
You are so wrong! Until we learn how to learn to love unconditionally we are going to bounce from one crazy to another. If your husband is using porn it is not your fault, I never blame, but you can still get his interest back by learning how to love unconditionally. And before you say you did, you should know that if you had (again I am not blaming you for that, either, we are not taught) he would have zero interest in anything but you.
@@TheMarriageFoundation the assumptions that the unconditional love isn’t what has been there is completely non-validating. At what point is it on him to deal with what has changed him? All I’m saying is when someone is checking into why is my husband losing interest, the first checks should be what is HE doing that is different. Not immediately go into the woman who has been giving and loving for 10 years to stop her “complaining.”
Your views are conventional but they simply do not work for anything other than to justify one's own mundane reactions. I validate those who seek to heal their marriages by doing what works, including self-scrutiny and opening their heart. I find it is distracting to blame one's partner for being flawed, not a marriage-helping position. Using my processes work so many love them. It is okay for you to reject what I teach but you would do better to listen with an open mind. You can heal your marriage if that is what you want, to get him to love you, again..
@@TheMarriageFoundation for any woman out there who has noticed their husband is different and being distant and who is getting g denied and gaslighted about what they know is something, please read Dr. Romani’s book “It’s not you.” You probably have a gift of discernment and just dont have sufficient evidence. He is most likely engaged in some sort of adulterous behavior like looking at porn, an emotional affair, even a physical affair or on the down low. He will deny for years that it’s you who is crazy. Say,”you don’t have to change but I’m not going to stay and continue accepting this.” You have to set boundaries. You simply can’t unconditionally love away the behaviors.
If he wants her to stay the same he shouldn’t marry her … she loses interest too … bored from being taken for granted… weight gain … no libido ..same clothes same joyless obligatory sex … in the same position… same place … predictable.. no spontaneity… no romance 🥰 kids in laws work and life
Your comment reflects a souless marriage. Joy and love are spiritual and ever-expanding
@@TheMarriageFoundation I agree ☝️
@@TheMarriageFoundation absolutely which most are ! Marriage is for the benefit of men … health wise they win .. can’t argue with the numbers .. and my lived experience as a clinician marriage like most institutions was created for the benefit of men under patriarchy… it is what it is … women were not allowed to have credit own homes or jobs until less than 100 years ago ! So stop the cap 🧢!
Yeah, I just tell husbands these days to rather focus on anything but sex. As soon as a man needs sex, he is going to have trouble for the rest of his life.
Are you a marriage counselor?? You need to look more deeply into our programs and change yyour thinking based on truth and what works.
themarriagefoundation.org/reviews/