After Addiction Ends His Political Career, Gay Man Bounces Back And Finds A New Purpose In Life.
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- Опубликовано: 10 сен 2024
- As a young politician with a promising future, Aaron Lawlor had a lot of ambition - and a lot of stress. Wanting to escape the pressure and find meaningful connections with other gay men in the suburbs of Chicago, Aaron made increasingly risky choices - which ultimately resulted in drug addiction and an HIV+ diagnosis. Thanks to a close friend and the recovery community, Aaron bounced back with better friends and a more meaningful job.
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This is a great story and happy you found a great path forward. I'm 43 and still struggle immensely with finding meaningful connection with gay men. I find that 99% of gay men I try to connect with on social meeting apps, dating apps, even at meetup groups are just looking for sex and no one seems to want to get to know me for an actual friendship or relationship. The only community I have seen is with gay sports leagues, which I'm not interested in, and with alcohol recovery groups since then tend to be ongoing and I'm not an alcoholic. Over the past few years I've constantly done things alone like going to the theatre, eating in restaurants alone, going on vacation alone, etc. I think pursuing gay community is sort of a never ending quest that never seems to get anywhere, but lately I've tried to focus on just being content being alone and doing things alone.
God Bless you...In my life time I've come to the realization that being alone is not so bad...Keep your head up for when you least expect it, a Beautiful Soul will come along...
did you do some volunteering at the gay community if you have one near you ? I think it may not be a bad idea. It may be sort of a never ending quests that never seems to get anywhere. Love is a strange matter. The more you look for it, the less you will probably find it. I feel helping people makes you feel good about yourself and that get you somewhere. You probably will make couple friends there for hanging out with. I think that is what you want for now, right? The story of Aaron Lawlor, the politician, he fell and found his own way to stand up again. His story is amazing. You are still young and have a lot of future. I would go out and do something rather than staying home and giving up. Be strong, be yourself, and be patient. I wish you luck.
I understand the frustration with the gay websites. From my experience they are hook-up sites, and the interest of others, if I’m a top or bottom? Really, I’m more than that, and have given up on gay sex, feeling better to have made a decision of celibacy, and if there is someone waiting to meet me, and wanting to meet me, that would be great, but not focusing primarily on sexual pleasure, but a meaningful relationship. But for now, not being motivated by loneliness and doing stupid things, am respecting myself, and willing to live the rest of my life alone. I’m through being frustrated by the lack of guys who want a relationship? it’s ok, but not giving myself anymore without a growing friendship, and accepting my abundant life without a man in it. I thought being gay was horrendous, but who knew being out was a different kind of equal frustration?
It's good to have a friend who told you how it was. So glad for you
Aaron, fantastic, thanks for your courage in telling your story so openly and sincerely. What I learned in counseling is that the more secrets we have, the sicker we are. We all need to be open, especially with ourselves. Thanks, man..........Ray
@Origami Help Desk - You are ignoring the fact that it is usually our secrets that lead to destructive behaviour such as drug use and unprotected sex. As such, the OP isn't saying that the secrets were worse, but that they were the cause for the unhealthy patterns he had adopted.
If you look at any healthy counselling service, it always begins with honestly and openly admitting those things we keep secret. It isn't to say that the secrets are worse than the behaviour, but that they are the catalyst for unhealthy behaviour. By exposing the secrets, one can more easily reject the behaviours that are merely unhealthy coping mechanisms.
In fact, the phrase thwy used "you are only as sick as your secrets" actually comes from the manuals used by Alcoholics Anonymous and other successful 12 step programs.
This concept is an integral part of any succsessful rehabilitation of an addict. If you would like to know more, I would recommend you start with this article: www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/stonewall-strong/201803/youre-only-sick-your-secrets
I don’t understand as a gay man myself, the self destructive forces which drive so many other gay men, but this man, is not only handsome but highly intelligent and articulate! It was a real pleasure listening to his story. Should he choose, he will one day be a steadfast partner to some lucky man, but also perhaps a father. Every happiness to him.
Not to say he doesnt deserve happiness, but why is he gonna make some man lucky? Why dont we as a community put the proper people upon pedestals? The ones who lead a clean life a steady job. Who never gave into their sex and drug addiction...but because he got clean off his bb orgy benders and drug parties, he deserves praise??? This should he a scarier message to STOP the current young men in our community from doing this behavior. I'm sorry but glorifying this and celebrating this is not the message we need...we need a story that truly paints how destructive this behavior is. I've watched people DIE from this drug and sex addiction epidemic in our community. So I will not stand here and take the positive route with this story
I completely agree with you! But my take from the story was one of regret and redemption. He acknowledged his self destructive behaviour finally and did something about it. I don’t think he was trying to glorify his behaviour. As you say, what is there to glorify? The man nearly killed himself. But having come through this, and come clean, he’s entitled to the same happiness the rest of us aspire to surely?
@@mwoz14222anyone who leads a perfect life certainly deserves praise. But so do those who have fallen and managed to get back up. Personally I’d rather have the latter as my friends.
@@juliancoulden1753 this channel glorified it. Come on. Hes an attractive white male. If he was not as attractive, or didnt fit the current mold of what the gay community idolizes this story would not resonate. The drug epidemic is frightening. This barely touches upon what he went through. And I'm sure he probably still isnt over it. Just painting a pretty picture for youtube
Also the guy misspent government money in the thousands of dollars for personal use. And continued to collect a salary and benefits when he left his office and never returned to work, yet waited for his term to end. I'm sorry but this is just a story to soften what he did. In my eyes, he hasn't paid for what he did as an elected official and what he did to his own life. Please stop glorifying these people.
You are amazing. So much of your reasons why mirror what were mine. The rooms of recovery gave back what I gave away to addiction. Loved seeing this!
VERY PROUD OF YOU!
YOU FELL DOWN, BUT YOU GOT BACK UP.
AND THAT'S A GREAT THING! HAVE MY PRAYER"S SUPPORT & LOVE. MUCH LOVE*
I'm happy for him! Stay strong!
Thanks for sharing your experience, strength and hope. Recovering Addict from Chicago, Illinois.
You go Aaron stay focused and never ever give up . Life's GOOD.👍👍😁
If I were to have the opportunity I would thank your friend for saving you so that we did not lose a brave and talented individual. Aaron, I hope you continue to serve as an inspiration to others.
I really feel for you. Nothing is worth having to go through all that. So glad you are so much better and I hope your life continues improve every day. Stay well.
What a great story. So happy to hear you’re doing well.
So happy you found your beautiful self and soul. Only the best to you ♥️
Awesome story! “Winter always turns to spring.” Thank you for sharing.
Thank you. You have my love and support.
Thank you for sharing such an honest and personal story. Really happy that you have recovered!
I 100% heart felt your story. Thanks for sharing honestly and I care for you. If you ever come to Malaysia for holiday, I will bring you to travel around, just being your friend and support each other
Fortunately, you had a good friend when you hit rock bottom to let you know that you needed help, Now, you're paying it forward.
Congratulations and continued happiness and success in your life. You deserve it !!!
Preach brother. Love you
May God bless you and hope you fine that meaningful connection your looking for.
i am looking in my area for community and find that all been closed out or abandoned ( groups, associations, meetups etc ) only one stayed strong but its so far away from my house. i ll get involve as a volunteer during pride next year and that will be that kind of opportunity that i seek to meet people who are involved with desire to make a difference on a voluntary basis. i have this call inside to go that route, so thats what lll do about it. 💕
One day at a time- I value your story!
Exactly how my ex treats me after walking away having been forced to start a family...yet no one will let me speak for myself
So happy for you.
This is a great story and an inspirational one.
This is a absolutely beautiful story from a even more beautiful man thank you for sharing this the world need this
What a great story and openness, I can relate to so much in this content!
Thank you for sharing your story. Celebrate your life and success every day, as there are many not so lucky to come out the other side.
Congratulations on your recovery bro
'It was fun , until it wasn't !..." i hear that from those lucky enuf to recover and save their lives ... Thank you for being honest and courageous, vulnerable and authentic !! you / WE ARE WORTH THE WORK ! hugs ,
I am glad you found the truth, to liberate yourself, you found peace.
Your a Lovely Soul , I’m so Glad You Found Your Purpose. Congratulations for getting Clean and choosing You.🙏🏽
Beautiful story
Yep - we burn bright and then run towards the cliff - sending love - what happened is natural, frightening and part of who we are - it’s because we are good at what we do and then there is the abyss.
Thanks for your story ☺️
Fico feliz em saber que você está se reorganizando.
A vida é chata mesma. Para todos nós. E com a droga fica tudo ainda mais complicado.
Agora, o trabalho que você está fazendo sem dúvida torna a vida mais suportável. A interação com pessoas de um grupo, de uma comunidade, dá prazer; embora efetivamente não elimine a nossa sensação de solidão.
Somos solitários em essência. Nascemos sós e morreremos sós. Mesmo que a bordo de uma aeronave com trezentos passageiros caindo vertiginosamente num estol irrecuperável, podemos até gritar juntos, mas nossas mortes serão individuais.
Então, considero tudo o que passamos na vida são experiências válidas, importantes, que nos levam no devido tempo, a fazermos tipo cursos de vida. E algo me diz que você já está na fase de pós-graduação, de doutorado.
Espero que um dia, no Logos, no Universo, eu encontre explicações que satisfaçam a minha curiosidade quanto às nossas trajetórias de vids :)
He got privilege, in a good way; encouraging, and positivity.
Very inspirational - thank you for sharing your story.
I wish him all THE BEST
We never know what others are facing so it’s best to be kind and gentle with each other rather than cruel and callous😊. Its amazing how God and the universe will guide us to our life’s purpose.
He's so cute too
Ew how
@@chudoberkommando1207 its all in the eye of the beholder.
It's really sad how difficult it is to make gay friends. It's like guys don't want to be your friend unless you have model good looks or something. I've basically just given up and now pretty much keep to myself.
Christopher Barr true. It would just be nice to have someone to hang out with and talk about life or whatever.
Christopher Barr not sure about that. It’s been years since I’ve been on a date...or anything else. I’m more about who they are on the inside. But true...looks doesn’t hurt.
Agreed
I'm glad hes doing better hes such a great guy
Great story. You are a brave soul good for you .
You don't need to hold a press conference. When I was a transit director I was not out, but very publicly supported gay rights and gay rights legislation. Because of my public positions my later public coming out surprised no one. 🌈
Good that the youngster found his way...
Feel well be well.
Private investigators should be regulated and illegal in some cases. If borders on stalking
Wow hiring a private investigator? Very disturbing
This is the U.S for you
inspiring story from a good man. i wish u the best!
2020 & i can't believe bathhouses n Chicago r still open.
Stu Mack you can’t believe in a good way or bad way?
Haven't people died in those places?
Awesome story. Fuck this channel is a goldmine.
Yes I agree I just found it a few months ago
Great story. 👍
inspirational!
STAY SOBER..PRAYERS UP
so admire you.
If a reality tv show host can become PRESIDENT, honey anything is possible!!
God bless you 💜
❤❤❤
This type of story is all too common with gay men. Trust me. I know.
Ehh.....won the loto pretty much and pissed it away. Drugs and sex and being nasty. Could have had a great life. Glad he is better now. Why do so many of us have to destroy ourselves.
He was ADICKTED.
Another stunningly handsome and gifted man who "needed" drugs. Tough to grasp, in my opinion, with one exception. Guys who do not have a Bible-based belief system seem lost, in my opinion. I'm gay and average-looking at best. Tried pot once, in the Navy. Now I don't touch alcohol. I consider myself a Christian. Life is not easy, but it's more difficult with drugs and alcohol, in my opinion.
Thief and a liar. He ran as an independent first and didn't get elected. He then posed as a Republican and was acting as such earning the trust of those around him. He then used his position to make several awful and determimental decisions that adversely affected the lives of Lake County residents. He speaks about his recklessness was when he was living in Chicago, embezzling funds to support his drug use, and hosting certain parties that resulted in his illness (which is treatable). The P.I. investigation was for his embezzling money not for him being gay. Don't let him fool you. He was reckless and never charged for his misdeeds. No return of money. No charges. I honestly feel for him, but he was a wolf from the very beginning. Don't believe me? Do your digging. He's never learned his lesson because he's been protected by his new community because he never had the guts to come forward like Terry Wepler of Libertyville did as a sitting mayor (where Aaron went to H.S.). Again, no hatred here. I watched a close family member struggle to breathe with pneumonia caused by longterm AIDS affliction. It's not what it used to be. Lawlor acted for himself the entire time while serving and there are others who were on the board at the time who got away scot free despite their atrocious service.
Now that's not very nice.