Not talking to your child for two years and kicking her out when she was injured is pretty crappy behaviors. Her choice to forgive, but she should be cautious if he did it once he do it again. Next time he gets in a relationship she should be prepared to get stabbed in the back. Therapy is great but I think her Dad is not worth the effort.
OP's dad sold his soul to a literal Demon In the Sack for passionate hugging. Stepmom is legit either a Cluster of Bees (ONLY refers to abusive instances of cluster B) or WORSE. Those are Stepmom's reasons, for Clusters of Bees/Narcissists do not logic, and see others as competition if they are not narc supply.
I would have never forgiven him. Even if she had taken the car out without asking, that’s his kid. Teenagers make mistakes, you don’t kick them out while they’re down. If my kid had done that I would definitely never let them forget it but I would be more thankful that they were alive.
Op is missing the part when her father kicked her out on lies with no solid évidences. He is just à little man with no back bone to assume his actions. Op should let him be alone nothing good can come out of that coward
One of the hardest things as a child is realizing your parents are also people. Good on OP forgiving your dad It won't heal just him, but you as well as you have your old father back. Stepparents truly can be the worst. Be cautious though I don't think your father will make the same mistake again. What's important is realizing your dad regretted his action and admitted them, which means he's genuine about you. If he didn't care he never would've responded. Of course he'll need to repair the damage that was done but the bridge is still there and not burned. Forgiveness is a virtue that takes a heavy toll but pays out just as much.
@@markarca6360 I'm one of those people who just wouldn't want that piece of shit in my life ever after all that transpired. Who needs enemy with family like that.
Nah You can forgive for yourself and still have nothing to do with someone. OP herself literally said her life was better when her dad wasn't around. She's setting herself up for failure. That's exactly why she made the comment about people calling her weak or stupid because she might not be weak or stupid in general. But in this instance she is being incredibly weak and incredibly stupid. All on the hopes of some fantasy that her dad will magically become a good person because he's not boning the Stepmom anymore 🤦 He's still the same miserable man who chose p pussy over his own child
Let me see. The stepmom acts cruel and evil her entire life making up lies, the father believes the stepmom right away instead of talking to his daughter and getting the truth, kicks the daughter out after she gets in an accident because he believes the stepmom with her lies again. If anything she should have just posted it after she got out of high school instead of waiting. If it affects a business deal oh well. So far i only heard the stepmom calling saying she needed to agree never the father. Plus the stepmom hasn't apologized. The father and daughter need to clear the air
Yep, you basically nailed it. Except that OP had told her Dad the truth several times,he refused to believe her. Can't upset his twat. Now whether Daddy dumbazz has learned his lesson remains to be seen. When he gets hooked up with another gal. Is he going to trust his brain and his daughter or is he going to let his dck run the show again. OP's desperate to have "family" because of her Mom leaving. I hope it doesn't bite her in the butt.
Congrats, OP. You and your Dad came out of that terrible time of being deluded and torn apart by your step monster better than most would have. You're stronger than I am in that you've been able to forgive a lot and you'll probably go on forgiving. I would be less willing, in your place to forgive easily. I'd make my Dad WORK HARD for that forgiveness. I'd make him help me to sue the step monster for alienation of affection as well as defamation of character (for when she told him lies about the car accident) and I'd make him pay all the legal fees. For me that would be a pre-requisite to talking about forgiveness.
Before hearing update 1: absolutely not. While she may not have been speaking for him, he chose HER over trusting you. She’s the one he values more. Her actions absolutely have consequences for him, and the sooner he realizes that, the better. As long as she’s still around, it’s never gonna change the fact that he’s still choosing her.
Somehow i knew OP would go back to the dad. He’s been with her her entire life, and knows her history of lying or not lying. And he’s been around the step-mom for like a decade, and seen how little she cares for OP. So, of course he sides with step-mom. And he does it at the start of three months of mandatory bed rest. He has doubts, but is afraid to act on them, because what if he’s right? That would mean he had once been wrong. That man is a pile of red flags. Do not reconcile. Do not move back. Don’t even talk to him. He had no problems kicking a grievously injured child out of his home, after the most traumatic event of her life. (I assume she’s was too young to remember her mother’s death.). You don’t come back for that. So this is HIS teachable moment. And let’s hope he does better at raising the next kid. Oh, that’s right… his wife left him. Then, not only is he not worth keeping in contact with, he’s also not worth teaching.
She’s dumb for forgiving him not only did he kick her out and trust a girl that he didn’t know as long as he knew his daughter and then he has audacity to want to apologize to her wow the person that caused her trouble is there so doesn’t matter if he didn’t want to do it at his wedding renew he wanted to do it in front of the girl that caused all the trouble and then he wants to say he was nervous to tell you even though it’s been two years and he had two whole freaking years to tell you
Op you do what feels right 50% of the time your gut tells the truth so listen to the lil voice if it feels good go for it only if your heART really wants it
Ugh... the AI part in the end was very jarring... no one talks like that... which leaves a layer of complexity and discomfort to the already difficult narrative...UGH!
In what state can an unlicensed driver go driving without a licensed driver with them, as long as they ask if its ok. Doesn't that sort of defeat the purpose of a license
OP is way too forgiving. Sure, her father is “trying” to make amends but she made it too easy for him. Imo, it’s all too little, too late. Like, what kind of shitty father has no qualms about believing his wife’s blatant lies and kicking his daughter out of her home whilst she’s at her most vulnerable recovering from serious injuries?!! That’s a clear case of abandonment (which OP had already experienced from her biomom) and is a form of abuse. I suspect that all kinds of emotional abuse from both the stepmom and dad had been going on for years. For so long, in fact, that it’s been normalized. He clearly often prioritized his wife, neglecting his own daughter’s wellbeing. It sounds like OP has always been so starved for parental attention and affection that she’s willing to take any scraps her dad throws at her…even now. She really should’ve made him work harder for reconciliation because he doesn’t deserve it. Not so soon, at least, and not completely. What’s worse is that although her grandparents love and support her, they obviously still strongly advocate for their own son, so I can only imagine the pressure she feels to forgive her dad. I feel so bad for OP because no one has ever fully been on her side. 😔
Worst part is the dad doesn't even want to make amends because he actually regrets What he did. He's only trying to do it because he has a guilty conscience and it's probably eating him alive because he knows his marriage is falling apart. So he's trying to get his daughter back as a pathetic miserable last attempt to hold his life together Way too many instances of dads or moms choosing their new hookups over their kids only to act like it was a mistake and to try and fix things only for it to be revealed that they're still the same crappy person Because they only keep the mask on for so long
OP is a much more forgiving person than me. Her father has been failing her as a parent since she was 4 & allowing his wife to emotionally abuse his child. And dad took the wife’s side each & every time. There’s no evidence in this entire account of OP’s father actually putting her first, as a parent should. I just hope OP doesn’t come to regret letting her father back in. The stepmom might’ve been the shit stirrer, but dad allowed all of it. Idk, I’m just not buying the dad’s sob story. The man seems like a weak minded coward.
I’m guessing OP isn’t from America. In America, you’d have gotten a learners permit. You are allowed to drive the can, as practice, but only when a fully licensed person is with you in the car. You wouldn’t get to drive solo until after you pass the test.
Reddit audiences are too fast to reject the idea of forgiveness and repairing damaged relationships. Good on O.P. for giving her old man a second chance, everyone deserves a chance to at least try to apologize and make amends for their mistakes
I mean. He deserved the NC. When OP was on the lowest and need him, where was he? Is that how family should be? What the different did it make between him as father and a stranger?
He didn’t deserve forgiveness. It’s good on OP for attempting to mend fences however it is entirely OPs decision as to whether they forgive their father
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Bruh, the father abandoned her and she still felt obligated to apologize, she's a better person than i am
Not talking to your child for two years and kicking her out when she was injured is pretty crappy behaviors. Her choice to forgive, but she should be cautious if he did it once he do it again. Next time he gets in a relationship she should be prepared to get stabbed in the back. Therapy is great but I think her Dad is not worth the effort.
She is far more forgiving than I ever would be, he is one lucky dad 😬
OP's dad sold his soul to a literal Demon In the Sack for passionate hugging. Stepmom is legit either a Cluster of Bees (ONLY refers to abusive instances of cluster B) or WORSE. Those are Stepmom's reasons, for Clusters of Bees/Narcissists do not logic, and see others as competition if they are not narc supply.
I would have never forgiven him. Even if she had taken the car out without asking, that’s his kid. Teenagers make mistakes, you don’t kick them out while they’re down. If my kid had done that I would definitely never let them forget it but I would be more thankful that they were alive.
Op is missing the part when her father kicked her out on lies with no solid évidences.
He is just à little man with no back bone to assume his actions.
Op should let him be alone nothing good can come out of that coward
One of the hardest things as a child is realizing your parents are also people.
Good on OP forgiving your dad
It won't heal just him, but you as well as you have your old father back.
Stepparents truly can be the worst.
Be cautious though I don't think your father will make the same mistake again. What's important is realizing your dad regretted his action and admitted them, which means he's genuine about you. If he didn't care he never would've responded.
Of course he'll need to repair the damage that was done but the bridge is still there and not burned.
Forgiveness is a virtue that takes a heavy toll but pays out just as much.
I agree, for OP's peace of mind. However, other people see it as a "free pass" to re-offend, the reason why people don't forgive easily.
@@markarca6360 I'm one of those people who just wouldn't want that piece of shit in my life ever after all that transpired. Who needs enemy with family like that.
Nah You can forgive for yourself and still have nothing to do with someone. OP herself literally said her life was better when her dad wasn't around. She's setting herself up for failure. That's exactly why she made the comment about people calling her weak or stupid because she might not be weak or stupid in general. But in this instance she is being incredibly weak and incredibly stupid. All on the hopes of some fantasy that her dad will magically become a good person because he's not boning the Stepmom anymore 🤦 He's still the same miserable man who chose p pussy over his own child
Let me see. The stepmom acts cruel and evil her entire life making up lies, the father believes the stepmom right away instead of talking to his daughter and getting the truth, kicks the daughter out after she gets in an accident because he believes the stepmom with her lies again. If anything she should have just posted it after she got out of high school instead of waiting. If it affects a business deal oh well. So far i only heard the stepmom calling saying she needed to agree never the father. Plus the stepmom hasn't apologized. The father and daughter need to clear the air
Yep, you basically nailed it. Except that OP had told her Dad the truth several times,he refused to believe her. Can't upset his twat. Now whether Daddy dumbazz has learned his lesson remains to be seen. When he gets hooked up with another gal. Is he going to trust his brain and his daughter or is he going to let his dck run the show again. OP's desperate to have "family" because of her Mom leaving. I hope it doesn't bite her in the butt.
The father and stepmother are DISGUSTING. Why was she apologising???😲
Parents who believe the stepparent over their kid, when the kid has never been proven to be a liar, are evil.
The problem is not with the father, it's Ops stepmom she's basically ruining the relationship between her husband and Op.
Hell no but communication is key
Congrats, OP. You and your Dad came out of that terrible time of being deluded and torn apart by your step monster better than most would have. You're stronger than I am in that you've been able to forgive a lot and you'll probably go on forgiving. I would be less willing, in your place to forgive easily. I'd make my Dad WORK HARD for that forgiveness. I'd make him help me to sue the step monster for alienation of affection as well as defamation of character (for when she told him lies about the car accident) and I'd make him pay all the legal fees.
For me that would be a pre-requisite to talking about forgiveness.
this story sounds like the "Simp" finally had a moment to realize what he was doing, and that he needed to break up before the damage was even worse.
Before hearing update 1: absolutely not. While she may not have been speaking for him, he chose HER over trusting you. She’s the one he values more. Her actions absolutely have consequences for him, and the sooner he realizes that, the better. As long as she’s still around, it’s never gonna change the fact that he’s still choosing her.
Your dad told you to move out- he is involved.
This poor girl... She has been disappointed and rejected by everyone who should have been there for her.
Somehow i knew OP would go back to the dad. He’s been with her her entire life, and knows her history of lying or not lying. And he’s been around the step-mom for like a decade, and seen how little she cares for OP. So, of course he sides with step-mom. And he does it at the start of three months of mandatory bed rest. He has doubts, but is afraid to act on them, because what if he’s right? That would mean he had once been wrong.
That man is a pile of red flags. Do not reconcile. Do not move back. Don’t even talk to him. He had no problems kicking a grievously injured child out of his home, after the most traumatic event of her life. (I assume she’s was too young to remember her mother’s death.). You don’t come back for that. So this is HIS teachable moment. And let’s hope he does better at raising the next kid. Oh, that’s right… his wife left him. Then, not only is he not worth keeping in contact with, he’s also not worth teaching.
She’s dumb for forgiving him not only did he kick her out and trust a girl that he didn’t know as long as he knew his daughter and then he has audacity to want to apologize to her wow the person that caused her trouble is there so doesn’t matter if he didn’t want to do it at his wedding renew he wanted to do it in front of the girl that caused all the trouble and then he wants to say he was nervous to tell you even though it’s been two years and he had two whole freaking years to tell you
Love the way he said when the story was end..
Huh?
@@treco2583 “thx everyone for listening..” like that
Op you do what feels right 50% of the time your gut tells the truth so listen to the lil voice if it feels good go for it only if your heART really wants it
On this sub they preached a lot of unforgiveness.
Op's dad willingly abandoned his daughter for two years. For a lot of people that would be unforgivable.
@@potatoman305 She is right to forgive. We all make mistake!
@@lynettephillip2412Honey, there's making a mistake. Then there's F'ing up so bad that you blow the house up. Dad blew the house up.
Sadly he only back because his wife left him
Ugh... the AI part in the end was very jarring... no one talks like that... which leaves a layer of complexity and discomfort to the already difficult narrative...UGH!
L dad
In what state can an unlicensed driver go driving without a licensed driver with them, as long as they ask if its ok. Doesn't that sort of defeat the purpose of a license
OP is way too forgiving. Sure, her father is “trying” to make amends but she made it too easy for him. Imo, it’s all too little, too late. Like, what kind of shitty father has no qualms about believing his wife’s blatant lies and kicking his daughter out of her home whilst she’s at her most vulnerable recovering from serious injuries?!! That’s a clear case of abandonment (which OP had already experienced from her biomom) and is a form of abuse. I suspect that all kinds of emotional abuse from both the stepmom and dad had been going on for years. For so long, in fact, that it’s been normalized. He clearly often prioritized his wife, neglecting his own daughter’s wellbeing.
It sounds like OP has always been so starved for parental attention and affection that she’s willing to take any scraps her dad throws at her…even now. She really should’ve made him work harder for reconciliation because he doesn’t deserve it. Not so soon, at least, and not completely. What’s worse is that although her grandparents love and support her, they obviously still strongly advocate for their own son, so I can only imagine the pressure she feels to forgive her dad. I feel so bad for OP because no one has ever fully been on her side. 😔
Worst part is the dad doesn't even want to make amends because he actually regrets What he did. He's only trying to do it because he has a guilty conscience and it's probably eating him alive because he knows his marriage is falling apart. So he's trying to get his daughter back as a pathetic miserable last attempt to hold his life together Way too many instances of dads or moms choosing their new hookups over their kids only to act like it was a mistake and to try and fix things only for it to be revealed that they're still the same crappy person Because they only keep the mask on for so long
OP is a much more forgiving person than me. Her father has been failing her as a parent since she was 4 & allowing his wife to emotionally abuse his child. And dad took the wife’s side each & every time. There’s no evidence in this entire account of OP’s father actually putting her first, as a parent should. I just hope OP doesn’t come to regret letting her father back in. The stepmom might’ve been the shit stirrer, but dad allowed all of it. Idk, I’m just not buying the dad’s sob story. The man seems like a weak minded coward.
Op shouldn't forgive the dad he's a spineless coward.
Edit: The original poster, is a far better saint she's forgiving for doing nothing wrong.
I’m guessing OP isn’t from America. In America, you’d have gotten a learners permit. You are allowed to drive the can, as practice, but only when a fully licensed person is with you in the car. You wouldn’t get to drive solo until after you pass the test.
Yeah I'm not going to lie if this was my dad pulling this shit on me I'd be long gone and wanting nothing to do with him
OP is still a doormat. Stop grovelling.
AI took the script from The Office lol
This is why I hate liars. They fuck things up for everyone.
Nah NTA dad and stepmom FAFO
Reddit audiences are too fast to reject the idea of forgiveness and repairing damaged relationships. Good on O.P. for giving her old man a second chance, everyone deserves a chance to at least try to apologize and make amends for their mistakes
I mean. He deserved the NC. When OP was on the lowest and need him, where was he? Is that how family should be? What the different did it make between him as father and a stranger?
He didn’t deserve forgiveness. It’s good on OP for attempting to mend fences however it is entirely OPs decision as to whether they forgive their father
He will crap on her again. She is just setting herself up to get hurt. That was a pattern of behavior.
She should keep her guard up
When people show you who they are, believe them.