Joe Rogan Experience
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- Опубликовано: 14 янв 2019
- Theo Von is a stand-up comedian, television personality, host, and actor. Check out his podcast called “This Past Weekend”& "The King & The Sting" with Brendan Schaub both available on iTunes & RUclips.
Theo is like a comedy pro boxer. You think you're ready, you have your guard up and BAM he hits you real hard from a weird angle with impeccable timing and you're howling. His mind is a beautiful mystery.
b i g o s u That's a poem
b i g o s u perfect explaination
Idk about all that
Drake Hayes try it out👖
@@beenjamminbuttons7771 Don't step on his mojo, kiddo
imagine being so high you forgot the word "symmetrical"
e·qui·dis·tant
/ˌēkwəˈdistənt,ˌekwəˈdistənt/Submit
adjective
at equal distances.
"he wants to be equidistant from both political parties"
Lol exactly what I was thinking
im pretty sure he meant equivalent...
Doom Sayer 😭😭
This comment was what I was looking for lmao
The old podcasts age like fine wine. 🍷
I've watched Theo and Burr over and over
44minutes in i can confirm
Theo is seriously on another level when you really consider his creativity
Facts
Imo he is the best comic on earth right now
I think his life and experiences literally makes him think about things so differently from most people…dark humor for days…I think some of us think the same shit, but it’s like Theo’s filter is broken! What most are scared to say, he just says it…and the fact he is so lovable by everyone, nobody gets offended! That’s my kind of humor, and I’m here for it all day everyday!
Theo is my spirit animal and I'd love to dose Lucy with him. He would be amazingly insightful and it would be an awesome experience to do that with him and Joe. It definitely brings people together.
His mind is fucked.. I love it 😂
You know it’s boutta be gold when Theo says “this one guy from my hometown”
Or "this man by us..."
Always
Oh one hundred percent
Or "I remember when I was young..."
everytime he said that i started laughing bc i just knew it was going to be funny
Jamie snickering in the background every time Theo makes a joke that Joe misses, so good.
Bro I swear I'm a Theo fan NOW every sentence was hilarious.
No lie! I was dying with everything Theo said and Joe was completely oblivious!
Dirty math tatted around her puss. Didn’t even phase Rogan. Had me dying.
Shame no one time-stamped this gem.
Not cracked out so much when the bees show up lol
“Draw it for me on a napkin”
Theo you absolute mad man. 😂
“We don’t use animals enough. They’re usually just sitting around.” Lol
Lmaoo
Vegans would disagree 💀
That's such a dumbass human comment
@@yfoog he was joking lmao
@@yfoog ironically your comment is the same thing.
"you know we dont use animals that much, theyre just sitting around most of the time" - Theo Von, 2019
Somewhere in Alabama is an Owl with no feathers, sitting telling his grandowls "Yeah he got a hunk of my wing in his mouth, I dun flew outta there like a rocket to tell you this here story!" and the wee owls are like "fuuuuuuck duuuuuude..."
Owls heading towards Theo Von's tailer now they want to be put to work! Selling steroids on the side of the highway" :D
Love the shit he comes up with! 🤣😂
Theo is fattening up some Owls for thanksgiving
How long do trees live for?
@@quantumentangle154 forever if the believe in jesus
Joe got so high he can't shut up for 1 second, he's every girlfriend Theo ever had 😂
Every friend Theo has ever had has since passed. RIP.
"We had a dude..." Every time Theo says that, he is the dude.
Yup 😭😭😭😭😭
😂
Fuuuuck! The truth shall set you free ...damn!@!
gonna start using this
😂🤣🤣
"I met Buzz Aldrin , from the moon, and when I met him it didn't seem like he'd been to the moon." the words coming out of this guys mouth are pure gold
I'm so happy you shared this. This line has been stuck in my head all week. I keep trying to get friends to listen to anything Theo says. It's hard to explain just how funny he is, or why he's funny, until you hear him
Just like when they discover a serial killer and all the neighbors who get interviewed say "I never would have thought he was a killer, he was such a nice guy"....lol...lol... People are so stupid sometimes that its pure entertainment to the rest of us with at least half a brain!!
The way his mind works kind of reminds me of Karl Pilkington. Like he just thinks of things that you would never think of but at the same time makes some sense.
I missed that timestamp please?
He's the American Karl pilkington
“A couple of these bitches could be variables.” -Theo Von
Damn straight.
Theo is the new King of Comedy. He is bordering on being an alien he is so uniquely funny.
I lost it when they were talking about owls and Theo said “there’s not a lot of meat on those things”.
Theo "bees will motivate anybody" Von lmfao
This is super confusing to me: Why do I have so many fans on RUclips even though I am the unprettiest RUclipsr EVER? Good night dear 501bloo
"You're not all cracked-out once the bees show up"
What is it bees
He's right eddie bravo talked about it you just got to look into it
@@AxxLAfriku You shouldn't be confused. This generation of neckbeards love autistic channels.
"I met Buzz Aldrin... he didn't seem like he had been to the moon." ... never change Theo.
Ryan Staebler crazy he said that.. recent video of buzz saying they havnt been to the moon..search it up
I was mad Joe cut him off and they didnt continue that conversation
@@MarioHernandez-lp7yb Yeah, sucks
Underrated comment.
How dumm can u be? Know what u talking about, do some research u lazy nut ....
“Homeless people don’t do much of anything but when Bees show up, they get to doing things!” Too funny!
Funny to come watch this 4 years later and listen to some of the things they speculate about that is happening now or close to. Theo and Joe are always entertaining.
Theo: " a couple of these bitches could be variables", one of the greatest lines i have ever heard. This also applies a lot in life.
Joe thinks he's smarter than he is, and Theo is funnier than he thinks.
This was an amazing line and got no attention.
@@jubaldurden4638 Joe literally says in this podcast how stupid he is....
@@stickyickytoker Yeah, but how much does he really believe that, deep down? It shows in the way he treats some people. I really like him, but he does think he's smarter than a lot of people. It's not as if that's the worst trait a person could have or anything though.
@@jubaldurden4638 Oh shit! Facts!
Joe - "You don't like the french?"
Theo - "No one does."
Joe - "That's no true, people go Paris every year."
Theo - "Yeah but they leave"......
DEAD
This had me creasing.
Time stamp?
LOL priceless
@@jaden5843 3:01:59
That's a perfect Theo Joke that Joe cant catch it's a joke, he just burns Theo when he tells one, or he just doesn't pick up on it.
I love when Joe mentions that he’s a comedian 😂
Theo is such a unique comedian. He’s so quick witted and he doesn’t need to force it. Him and Joe mesh so well.
“The Dutch are very aerodynamic. Jamie pull up a Dutch”
Justin Rudolph I snorted ... so funny!!
this joke flew right past Joe's head
Ok
I p
Lol
Bees will motivate anybody
-Theo Von 2019
Whole Foods sells pro bee bags
He ain’t lying 😂🤣😂🤣
fuck yeah bro im motivated just hearing that
You’re not all cracked out once the bees show up
Theo made bee's great again......
Theo being horny during the entire podcast is too funny😂
it’s cringe
These two laugh so much together. Love watching them laugh together.
"Well I'm surprised we don't have more ghost animals"
That was a classic lol
How does Joe not fucking acknowledge that line? He either deliberately ignored Theo there or he’s warp speed high.
@@cgates2 every podcast with Theo, Joe totally ignores at least a dozen of these beautiful one liners that Theo drops. I can't tell if he's just puts them so casually out there and drops them so subtle that Joe's too high to notice, or there's just too many to catch all the time haha
That was my favorite line
That’s some seriously smart shit. Hilarious smart shit haha
"An eleventh (1/11th) of a handful..." this will be my answer to most quantity questions from now on.
lololololol
I´ll use it
Andrea amazing answer lolll
An??
Andrea 😂😂😂😂😂 there should be a toon for that 👌
Theo subtlety implying that animals are lazy and should be working/ serving us more is so ridiculously funny to me
The most timeless podcast ive ever seen. Itll still be entertaining 20yrs from now. Gonna have alien's wondering how Theo was even considered to be 'intelligent life'.
I think he's the most unusually intelligent person ever. Dude really thinks outside of the box like no other yet makes it to his destination somehow.
@@meredithgrubb4497 HES UPSTAIRS
"If you're gonna feed a family of four you're gonna need more than one owl" ~Theo Von
Theo: They're a lot smaller than you'd think---LoL! Joe: that's illegal you know?
I love how everything Theo doesn’t understand fully is “the dark arts” 😂
He usually refers to the dark arts as things that are bad for your soul; coco, pr0n, master bait shun, impure thoughts
Edit: i heard the part you were referring to, i think. About the sound waves from different MHz levels making patterns in sand. I don't think he didn't understand it as much as he was comparing it to how a Ouija board attracts "spirits" to spell words and phrases. Theo was raised in Louisiana lol Their religious beliefs can be pretty intense.
Does Joe have chew in his mouth?
its not that he dont understand, he uses it to describe darker parts of life.
This had me rolling 🤣
@@ilikemyowncomments9065 dude analyzing theos content for facts about his life is like watching a cat to understand Shakespeare
Theo comes up with stuff even he don't understand 😂😂
I'm watching this in 2024 and it's incredible how things have changed in 5 years...
Jamie growing them grey hairs from the stress of constantly having to fake laugh everytime Joe makes a joke and looks over at him.
😂 the poor bastards gonna look like Joey Diaz within two years if Rogan keeps running this shit!
This post made me realize I do infact not want Jamies job.
I have this weird feeling that Jamie has a very unfufilling job and if it werent for the weed and interesting guests he would have quit a long time ago. Hope im wrong but Joe seems like less and less of a nice or fun guy as his stature grows
Greybeard and a nerds voice is a terrible combination! :D
SellingMySoulForPizza now that is fucking funny. I love how everyone can notice that weird shit.
Young Jamie is now Old Jamie.
This is free therapy. ❤😂
Amen sister
"You shouldn't say that on the podcast man thats illegal."
"Well, I didn't have a lot."
May have had 2 bites!
Actually I think I spit it out
Theo "your left hand is barely even your hand" Von
Mr Charles 😂😂🤣🤣😂😂
“What if a certain hertz just spelled your grandparents’ name”. Theo is a machine!😂
theo and joe together is the greatest thing i ever seen i watch it so much
Theo said “an eleventh of a handful” 😂😂😂😂😂
Everytime I read that I hear his voice in my head 😂🤦
American standard units of measurement
Yeah I was just learning the other day in math... the volume of a cone is V = (pie)r²(h/3) where h = theo von's handful.
"I love salt." -Theo Von, 2019
Rob 🤣
Who doesn't?
Classic Theo 😂
“Owls are gross” - Theo von 2019
"I met Buzz Aldrin, he didn't seem like he'd been to the moon"
-Theo Von, 2019
Thank the powers for a long form podcast that's 4 years old on RUclips
Joe and Theo?
Yes!
Theo’s Buzz Aldrin comment has me crying! 😂😂
Was very nice of Theo to interview Joe Rogan.
Seems more like a conversation than an interview.
@Decriminalize Darwinism I love when Joe is chill and present and also interested, but it's sometimes hard to watch after Joe uses some pot. I cant remember exactly who it was with, but the change was significant and Joe just got to some strange mood.
I used to smoke a long time ago myself, and I many times found myself.. dumb? out of the time and place? spoiling the moment for myself and sometimes people around. It doesnt make you bad or anything like that, just.. IDK, its natural and all, but that state of mind isn't. And oh boy I can tell how much worse it is when it becomes natural..
Ya. Don't recall seeing Joe on theos podcast.
@@theodoregideonshisha7919 could it be that Joe goes from listening and engaging, to teaching and informing? He goes through those waves during most of his podcasts, where he just dives deep into how things are, how they aren't, how they should be, what people think of things, and so on ad nauseum. The result is usually his guest voicing affirmatives for a few minutes, and then the topic starts trailing off.
Lmao Theo said "i'm surprised we dont have more ghost animals"
JoelRichardson I was dying when he said that!
I spit out my OJ 😂😂
@@dashiit1748 no it's not hilarious actually....
C'mon Joe, ya gotta at least acknowledge that golden nugget. Very original.
Word😂😂
not me yelling at my screed "SYMMETRICAL!"
Theo: "Twins" LOL
This guy is a comedic genius
Listening to Theo feels like you in your cousins tree house drinking dr pepper throwing m 80s at frogs
ah so thats why i dont get him
@@momdieddad no that's because your sense of humor sucks
Rogan does his thing but I can't believe he can talk to Theo von about comedy. Rogan comes across weird and awkward on stage with zero laughs. Theo von puts on a legendary show and is a natural born comedian.
It rubs off on joe too lol s”ee if that’s what that means”
Amen
“Is it sand?”
“This is probably salt”
Theo in the background: “I love salt”
Hahahaha yes!! Was gonna Comment that I'm glad someone caught it lol. Theo is quick witted
Joe is right. He has one of the most unique senses of humor 😂
Joseph Rodelero Roth how is that quick witted? Funny, yes, but quick witted?
also when he said "new jerksey"
Time stamp guys?
Bro, I love watching/listening these podcasts as I prepare my brisket. Especially when it's joe and Theo having a conversation.!!
“New Jerksey” Killed me 😂😂😂😂
The subtlety of Theo's humor is completely lost on poor Joe.
Michael Benson random is not subtle. Just cause you don’t laugh doesn’t mean you don’t get the joke.
@@liggerstuxin1 Yes, Theo's humor is also random (and uniquely creative). I still feel there's a disconnect.
lol tHeO's huMoR is AbOvE eVeRyBoDy ElsE's
stfu. you're making Theo look bad.
Subtle? lol
Idk man. That might be a little true on some of Theos older appearances but I think he got more laughs today than any other show. Joe was laughing almost the whole time homie. gang gang
Theo von looks like he could be the third character in beevis n butthead
Conrad Schleicher lmaooo
💯
S
9:09 almost died
That might be the greatest description of Theo Von I've ever known
Theo has what I like to call “southern sarcasm” 😂
When Joe Rogan and Theo von get together it's like boys in a treehouse just b***shittin
Can someone make a compilation of all Theo’s jokes that Joe missed
Pah Sodium i feel like it was the nick swardson 2.0 podcast
The first time Theo was on he literally missed every single one of his one liners or spoke right over it. Was sooooo frustrating. Joe just isn’t silly enough.
Lol “like nude jerksey “ hahaha
Darlene conner... shot milk out my nose
Toyota trucks and bacon too...
Patrick Swayze + Joe Dirt = Theo Von
😂
I´m somehow thinking Beavis & Butthead...
...sorry, dont wanna be disrespectfull.
I think Theo is genius!
LMFAO OMG MAN 🤣🤣😃
Dead 🤣🤣🤣
Add tom Brady
This interview is so wholesome 😂and hilarious i love this podcast
At work just watched this whole episode in my headphones and couldn’t stop chuckling, boutta watch the next one right after this lmao😅
Joe talks about stand up comedians like they’re a race of people lol
They are the supreme race.
For all his talk about tribalism being the worst thing about humans he sure uses it to his advantage.
I feel u it’s annoying lol
No Name I just think he has a different type of relationship with those people. Theo is a damn comedian and one of joes friends. Neil is a worldwide known scientist obviously things should be more serious between them.
its a validation thing. I love the podcast but joe takes every possible opportunity to speak as an authority/expert about stand up and also to indirectly put himself in the same category as the comedy greats and give himself an ego boost by subtly mentioning himself with the legends
Just lowkey drops the fact Stallone is coming on
Haha, ya. Hope it is relatively soon.
That was the highest of keys Linus Tech Tips kind of dropping of that news. What you talkin about Willis?
Joe literally said it lol.
No doubt. He's never had, and I don't how he could possibly ever have, a bigger celebrity.
FireMrshlBill the guy from those avenger movies?
GeneralTHC Mel Gibson, lance armstrong, James hetfield, Steve Tyler, guy Richie, soon to be Kanye west..... and more I can’t think of off the top of my head...
Them two together is the greatest.
joe feels like the older brother truly trying to have a meaningful conversation with his little brother who won’t stop fucking around 😭😂
Theo doesn't like owls because he's the Rat King🐀👑
Gang Gang
That's the dark arts
#RatKingKingdom
Good instincts, the owl is commonly used in illuminati/satanic symbolism.
@@obbah1818 I got legit worried when Joe started steering the beginning of the podcast too far into the dark arts. Amniotic sac babies are maybe the darkest art I can think of.
Do you think there's ghosts at the comedy store though?
“Dude, I watched bees communicate with each other one time. I was on the set of fear factor.”
The most Joe Rogan quote of all time.
Have you ever tried smoking DMT with chimpanzees?
John LeMay hahahaha
Just add in something about chimps and now hunting and the word “bizarre” and then you have the most Joe quote ever
Sounds like it was generated by an algorithm trained on stuff he says.
I think this idea came from James Hetfield and Joe made himself a story about it. He’s writing his life just like his comedy.
Its funny i have been hearing Theo say the owl for thanksgiving a lot lately and decided to rewatch this again and i think this is a true Theo story!!!
Theo: Is that Holly Hunter?
Joe: No, that isn't Holly Hunter.
Theo: I don't even know who Holly Hunter is.
Jared Ross he’s so fucking funny
Lmaoo
Can someone please time stamp this moment haha
He just talks out of his ass
Ben Ksyd no young Jaime
Thumbs up if you actually think Theo ate an owl
Adam K ten idiots
Of course he did.
82 idiots now bra, I'll fuck two/ three owls UP in one sitting. Owl giblet gravy on potato "pellets".
No he was making an analogy to the illuminati
That fool ate a mother fuckin owl, no doubt
"That'll make you strong if it's a heavy shirt" Theo is a genius!
Joe Rogan and Theo von together just works 😂😂
Hahahahahahaha
Von "You know i ate owls"
Joe "...isnt that illegal?"
Von "well i didnt eat alot"
I think i shit myself laughing
“I think I might’ve spit it out” lmaoooo
that was so funny went right over every ones head
Me too I lost it
Knowing him he prob did try owl for real
I fucking HOLLERED at that 🤣🤣🤣
I like how Theo takes every question seriously and takes time to think of them even if they are sarcastic.
They're both stoners talking crap. The only difference is that they have money
Reminds me of myself LOL.
@@elitev8888MN. I. U. U. B I 😮😮
But doesn't get the opportunity to answer most since Joe responds to himself immediately.
It's definitely cool because you can tell if he's thinking about a joking response or somthing he wants to say of intelligent value
funniest man alive, so simple yet so funny
48:10 yea I bet that place would be called New Jerksey
Joe hears Rocky and runs faster
Theo hears Rocky and punches his stepdad ... ha
What time is this lol
@@falaniko1231 16:47
LMFAO!!!!
I think he mixed up Rocky with 8 Mile
@@falaniko1231 88w888>I 3
Theo has such a unique and irreplicable comedic style
Thats no style he's just being himself lol
@@abrahamsalazar6246 style = personality = being himself
I find it’s a combination of life experience and lack of education! He’s not stupid that’s for sure but he’s not academically gifted lol 😂
He truly does, with him keeping a straight face makes it funnier. And this makes it hard to know if he's in character or being honest.
I lmao, he's a good guest
Any pods cast I watch u humble me respect brotha
The way Theo said “I hope not” when they talked about a pedo ring was so genuine
Theo "Eleventh of a Handful" Von
Made me spit out my coffee laughing.
He had me looking at my hand trying to figure out how much an 11th of a hand was. About the size of a quarter.
That fucking killed me!
How does his mind even work to make him say that hahahah
I fucking died 😂😂😂😂
I can’t decide whether Theo is a brilliant comedian, or if he’s sustained head trauma and all this brilliance is a happy accident.
William Miller 😂
all natural occurrence of beating down syndrome
Bofe.
Either way, the results are great, just enjoy it.
The plot of BEING THERE, great movie.
Theo and Joe together is the absolute best!
The word Joe was trying to think of was 'symmetrical'
Lmao I was saying it out loud while they were trying to guess it hahaha
“Did steroids on the side of the road.”
“Why didn’t you do it at home?”
“Seemed like an outdoor thing.”
Imdead
Theo's the best
*Interstate. Its all in the details
That had me in bits
Theo and that dude had sex. That's the impression I got. He talks about fucking dudes all the time and there was something weird about that story
PAULY TOONS. ARE YOU LISTENING.?
Theo "It's spring "
Joe "its mid winter"
Theo "you guys are not open minded"
🤣
Theo really said a peacock looks like a twink headed out for a night on the town. I am fuckinggg cryyyyying right now!😂
Lmfaaooooo
"let's go get some tinfoil" is an underrated line
Theo "That'll make you stronger if you got a heavy shirt" Von
Theo: ''I met Buzz Aldrin from the Moon and when I met him it didnt seem like he'd been to the moon, you know what Im saying though?'' Hahaha
LOLZ
😂😂
I feel that
Richard Sargeant we get it tho
Damn I wish Joe would have entertained that. He misses so many good tangents with Theo.
19.5 minutes: symmetrical
Really enjoy Theo and Joe together.
“I met Buzz Aldrin, you know- from the moon?”
-Rat King Theo Von
I'm not sure I get the rat king thing. He sort of comes off as a rat king so I guess there's that. But the bee sting shit for schaub. Just no.
@@MaynardOwns it's because they say he looks bloated like he was stung by bees
its actually annoying how many times Theos jokes go right over Joes head.
@The Deathless 😂👍
Is it possible Joe just doesnt find it that funny?
@@OGC558 joe is 500 times less funny than theo
kingryan69 The jokes are not going over Joe’s head he just chooses not to respond to them because he’s having a different conversation the jokes are stupid
Colby Kelley yes thank you and how many people on here didn’t get that
Theo is like the best friend I had in middle school
Theo says the craziest stuff and Rogan doesn't even flinch. Hilarious.
someone make a compilation of all the times joe missed theo’s jokes
Sara Tavares 2 hour video, easy.
So true..
This is..
There is a compilation video of joe rogan missing his jokes on RUclips. I've seen it and it's infuriating
Here ya go...ruclips.net/video/zhbRTWTTx54/видео.html
I spit all over myself when Theo asked if the evacuations were because of bees.
Tedwardo Feliz so fucking random 💯🤣🤣