The Autism Community
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- Опубликовано: 5 окт 2024
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What do you think the count is for the amount of times you said autistic
7:00 to 14:16 42
Tism or tistic
Btw i like it when your face scrunches around the noise. Like you're really thinking about something.
The Neuroscience and Biochemistry of Autism.✨
Anticipation level?😶🌫️ Waiting for a light bulb moment! Just one bright idea and those cogs are in motion!💯
I have been waiting for this one Paige, like a socket waiting for a light bulb to turn on. Can hardly wait to see the public dialog in the Community Section.🎉
Hopefully, since comments under videos are sometimes blocked by RUclips.🥰
The sexism in some spaces. I had to experience it from an autistic server filled with misogynistic pieces of trash who were upset that I am a woman who works to earn her money, who believes in birth control and abortion and who hadthe guts to put them back in their place. It really pissed me off to see the amount of bullying in that space was incredible. These guys scared women in that community. I would have banned everything single one of them.
times they are a changin, work on those sandwich makin skills, darlin.
@@peterbelanger4094 wow, you surely seem like a great person. Good thing there are men who are actually worth it. Not like you.
You are watching the wrong video bud, this isn't incel internet. @@peterbelanger4094
I'm 28 years old and live in my mom's basement now cause I was having trouble keeping (A LOT of) jobs and fell to drinking and partying as my usual coping mechanism. However now I quit drinking and found a job in a dental laboratory to do data entry for 3d printing and now I fully feel like I found my niche because most jobs aren't for me. A lot of jobs can be difficult for autistic people and sometimes they excel really well also. I personally though finally found something that suites me and there's not a lot of social activity. The social people though are really professional and kind as well. I'm really grateful for this job. I'm also grateful for your channel and how much you help people, thank you
Congratulations on your job! I've struggled a lot with many different jobs too so it just made me happy to hear about someone else out there in the world finding their niche 🥳
Congratulations on finding your niche and congratulations for stopping drinking. 🙂
I just purchased your book. I’m 34. As a child I was diagnosed with ADHD. My younger brother who is 22 is autistic and diagnosed as a child. My suspicions occurred back in 2020 when I came across one of your videos on TikTok. When listening to you I felt like I was meeting my own kind for the first time. The best way I can describe how I felt in that moment is it felt very surreal. Usually when I tell someone I believe I’m autistic they have this very confused look on their face and I know it’s because they perceive me as being “normal.” Im fascinated by the mind and I hope by reading your book I’ll gain a little more insight into yours and in return will help me to gain more insight into my own. Thank you for being a much needed voice in our community.
I’m 45 and was diagnosed 9 months ago. I have yet to meet anyone that is diagnosed or even suspects that they are on the spectrum. No one. I have no idea what the community is like except for here on RUclips for the last 5 years. Not bad so far. 🙂
There are several Discord servers that you can join.
im sure you have but you didnt know, there are plenty of communities irl and online that you can join!
It seems kind of widespread online, but I still can’t relate to many. I’m starting to wonder if it’s because I’m an awkward age (zillennial). Or maybe just because I’ve missed out on quite a lot of common experiences.
This is not "community" it's just text and videos. no real people here.
still just a world of lonely people staring at a screen, alone. no 'community", what an illusion.
Hey, 38 year old AuDHDer here, my ADHD hid my autism, just figuring out now that I do have Autism. I have always felt like the world is upside down and backwards, I think that we all have that strong senses of justice that is why we are so angry. You're doing a great job thanks for speaking your mind.
I had a private lunch with my boss' boss and found out shortly before that he was Autistic. I have ADHD and am self diagnosed autistic because there are no diagnostics in my city for my circumstances. I have never knowingly interacted with an autistic person before but more importantly, since becoming aware of the possibility of my autism We talked about patterns we see in work politics at even higher levels and it was like we came together and formed an autistic Voltron in talking about these patterns. It was a really unusual, but cool experience.
That's cool, I hope he remembers you and you get a promotion some day for having good ideas and being competent 👍
This absolutely needs to be a usual experience.
After I got diagnosed, bells started ringing in the heads of quite a number of my closest friends. In the end it turned out like 70% of my friends are on the spectrum or have ADHD and none of us were diagnosed, mainly due to the fact we're all around middle age and we slipped through the cracks. So we had an autistic community of sorts without even knowing it 😂
yeah, right, everyone wants to be in the "cool club" now.
@@peterbelanger4094 Nobody wants to be autistic dude. People just are.
😂 that's awesome!
@@peterbelanger4094it seems like the "cool club" is having the opinion that mental diagnosis and conditions aren't real? It's strange you think that, but okay, be you.
@@peterbelanger4094it's kind of like having a longer big toe than second toe. No one talks about it, so I've never thought to know if my one toe is linger than the other. But, once people talk about it commonly, it's more likely for more people to notice that they physically have different length toes.
"We take everything literally but cant communicate literally for shit" 👍
The correct spelling is *Literally*
@@jackielowrey3032 thank you i always mess that one up :')
I'd love to see more 'free-flow' videos where you talk and just let the bees take you wherever, and whenever you spot that you're being attracted by another bee, you just do a little 'bzzzt' to let us know you're switching. It's like a version of the jump-cut that will allow you to share stream of thought, rather than a pre-made script. It's insightful.
I love stream of thought videos and I love when people have bee moments. So many apologize for it and think it's throwing people off, but if I had my way, every conversation would be full of bees and we would go to all kinds of wild places.
26:00 this part really resonates with me. not only anger, but something i also feel heavily when i'm indulging in being in autistic spaces, listening to autistic stories, learning more about myself etc etc, is i find myself so overcome with hurt and sadness. there have been many times over the last few years where i've binge watched your videos for an entire day and just spent the day crying in my bed as i listen to you talk about things that i can understand to my very core. as i listen i reflect on the past. moments that have happened in my life, situations i've been in, things that i've done that never made sense but make perfect sense now, the realisations that i deserved help but didn't get it, every adult around me missing the signs and doing nothing. i get extremely weighed down by sadness and tears, as if i'm mourning something or someone. but then afterwards i feel lighter, and more well-equipped.
sometimes it's really helpful for me personally to indulge in feeling sad about things i can't change about my past. it's something i've never discussed with anyone but myself in my own head so it feels really personal, and i feel like i owe it to myself to acknowledge that those moments exist and how i felt mattered. as long as i don't dwell on it for longer than i should, it helps me
Great video!! “Just be nice” is a wonderful principle to live by!! I was recently diagnosed in middle age/midlife. Always felt out of place growing up and as an adult. And so glad there are more options these days for ways to find communities and subcommunities in the autism community.
fake nice is still a lie.
@@peterbelanger4094 I agree; it seems neurotypical society operates on a lot of lies. With this certain phrase, "just be nice" isn't about being fake nice but by being kind.
Please continue speaking on Autism Paige, I would not be where I am without you. All started from one TikTok video 3yrs ago.
I love your hair Paige!
The whole zoning out to follow the tangent and being able to traverse far reaching deeply technical topics at speed is deeply relatable to me.
The thousand yard stare when you look right and then follow the thread. I have been called out in so many work meetings for doing this.
Always told I’m causing problems because I see connections others are oblivious too
i find texting easier than speaking, even though i AM capable of speech. i just prefer talking through text. its gotten to the point where i often talk to my own dad through discord messages because im better able to verbalize what i want to say where i would get into a meltdown irl because of my communication trauma.
this new text based world we have is ruining our society. This is a terrible way to exist, stop all the text!!!!!
I'm often exactly the same. Sometimes I'm fully incapable of any kind of communition, but sometimes even when I'm not I just feel horrible trying to speak anyway. And I write so much better and more clearly anyway, and people tend to 'listen' and respond better to it anyway.
@@peterbelanger4094 Some people are too attached to their phones, yes, but for many, especially in the autistic world, it is their only way to increase their ability to communicate, and would otherwise suffer greatly without it.
Be careful with who you try to force to speak to you. Being forceful with people with speech difficulties is just going to worsen the issue. In extreme cases it might even turn into a legal matter, and I don't mean extreme for you but for the other person's experience.
@aerieldive wasn't joking when they used the word 'trauma'.
@@peterbelanger4094 what a weird thing to say under a post where a disabled person talks about how text based interactions are an accessibility tool for them to be able to communicate better.
I grew up with medical grifters who intentionally misdiagnosed me for profit. They had me and m family convinced I am schizophrenic and were bilking my family's insurance for 3k a month while not even being introduced to music training. (effective in greatly improving the life of at least 30 percent of the people with autism).
I've had other autistic people voice their doubts of me being autistic after knowing me for like 20 minutes. In their words, I "don't look autistic."
I’ve recently had a couple people be like, “Well, she’s high-level/is she REALLY, though?” when I say my daughter is autistic. Folks, she hand-flaps, covers her ears when a toilet flushes, and about half her diet is goldfish crackers. She was slow to walk, slow to talk, and slow to toilet train. She spent 2.5 years in occupational therapy and is still in speech therapy, which she has been in off and on (it should have been continuous, but people do be peopling) since she was 2. She is also ADHD-PI and dyslexic. SHE IS AUTISTIC. The fact she can mostly function in school/at day care and enjoys ballet, gymnastics, and swimming doesn’t mean she’s “fine”, or “normal”, or whatever! (BTW, I’m profoundly twice-exceptional; that doesn’t mean I’m “high functioning”, either! 🤦♀️)
@@misspat7555 goldfish crackers are really bad in general but especially for autists. Feed that child some beef! Nutrients are important, but avoiding toxins is more important. We're often more sensitive to toxins in environment and diet.
Every community has their bad apples and self-bigots.
For example, you'd think a 'community' of people as oppressed as queers would universally stand against oppression and all the the bad things done to them growing up, but no lol. Some of even the loudest of people at pride celebrations would say and do some pretty bad hate crimes.
I've had one guy tell me that i don't appear socially awkward, like ok thank you, i was awkward all my childhood but decided in adulthood to hide it by masking.
I hope this video gets 50 million views. It's been really hard to feel the pain, and see everyone else feeling the pain, and seeing the damage done by the anger, and then also needing to honor my own anger... it was good for my health to see that people are seeing and feeling the things I've been seeing and feeling, and are explaining it better than I have. It makes me feel like I'm not fighting alone, which in turn makes me feel less angry. Really really really really needed this. Thanks for giving me some much needed hope.
There are offline autism communities, support groups led by therapists are major. Also autism rights activist groups do meet offline.
I personally struggle with moms of autistic kids who are trying to beat out of their kids autism instead of trying to understand their children and unfortunately in Facebook communities there are many moms like these 🙁
Yes I have problems with that myself! Unfortunately I have a blind friend that belongs to that same group! Well she says it's OK Follows all the child exployeters on youtube.
I am a relatively newly self-diagnosed auDHD 44yr old woman in the UK, waiting absolutely ages and ages for a diagnosis I only started to realise it during the C-vid shiz that we went through and I absolutely love watching you. Your streams have not only helped me feel validated and helped me understand my kids better so we have been able over the past few years to put more and more things to help us cope with the big wide world out there. We give ourselves more compassion and each other. Thank you for your work, it is appreciated and I wish if people did n't like someone/creators why can't they just scroll on by or disagree respectfully too.
I wish so much that the Autisitc dating site Hiki was not affiliated with Autism Speaks. Hiki targets us.
What specifically are you referring to? Other than a couple examples of A$ and A$ Canada offhandedly mentioning Hiki on social media, I couldn’t find evidence of any formal partnership between Hiki and A$. If, indeed, they are in a partnership, it could be helpful if you cited some examples (even if you just point me in the right direction; I know YT typically suppresses comments with URLs).
Loved the rambling and lowered mask in this video! 💛 I could see myself in it so much. 😊
bestie please the bee thought of dancers targeted me so bad 😭😭 i started dancing when i was 4, had my first bouts of tendon damage at 12, started pointe and had got my first (and last) pair of pointe shoes at 13, found out my knees are fucked up at 15 (cuz i was using the wrong muscles and i’m hypermobile so my kneecaps now get pulled to the side by my outer thigh muscles) PLUS i had tendinitis in my achilles so i didn’t dance the next year, was barely able to the following year, then when i was 17/18 my knees and mental health were so bad i quit halfway through the year (which means i didn’t get to do a senior solo for the studio i had been dancing at for 12 years) and i haven’t danced since! now i’m 24 and just learning i’m hypermobile, think i might have heds and pots, and i’m so overweight from not being able to exercise because executive dysfunction, little to no stamina, asthma now worsened by covid, and just my body hurting so much in general that i honestly don’t think i’ll ever get to dance again :/
Happy 3rd anniversary 🏡🫶 Also, you take it back that you haven’t done any projects! Look at the gorgeous wall behind you! Your book is amazing and I hope to get a copy for myself soon, but I’ll keep putting it back on my list when I finish for now 💜
Haircut looks bomb on you! Another great vid full of validation, and realness. Thank you!
this is the only "autistic space/community" im a part of, i really dont like the other autistic channels i found on youtube, yeah i disagree with you on some stuff but with most stuff i agree and i respect the way you cover things and dont necessarily tell people what to think
Lately I have been reading several authors on the "Medium" platform (there's a lot of paid text and articles, but there is also a good handful of free texts, from a diverse group of people on the spectrum)
I really enjoy your videos; you have taught me so much about autism, and I appreciate you so much. When my daughter was diagnosed at age 16, I knew very little about autism, and the more I learn, the more I understand why she is the way she is. And the more I wonder about myself, whether I might be on the spectrum. My mom recently told me that she is also autistic, and I don’t know when she was diagnosed, or if she’s self-diagnosed, but I didn’t even question it when she told me, because it explained so much about my childhood.
38:20
I’m a bee
He’s a bee
She’s a bee
WE’RE ALL BEES, HEY!
I always feel like I am in everyones head and everyone is in my head. And it is torture.
This is a stellar experience, digesting what you have to say here. You say things in the way my mind puts things together, attenting to the "bees" and the patterns the bees fly in and the myriad ways that each of us are all independent imperfect brain people things with so much going on. I wish there was a way to automatically add a pause between each of your sentences though because the editing style of cutting out all the pauses makes the information much harder for me to process.
Maybe your logo can be a stylized hedge because in your connectivity video you were talking about hedge pruning
And it could have a lil flower and bee in there too!
I was already having such a lovely Sunday. Now a Paige video!!! Eeee ❤🎉
Hi, My Name is Ruben Avila and I am an Autistic Hispanic Male. I recently saw your video on Autism Speaks and thought it was good and informative. It also encouraged me to look into this type of RUclipsrs with Autism. I will be subscribing, and if their other good Autistic RUclipsrs you or anybody Eles should look into then please let me know! Thank You and have a nice day!!! 🙂
Thomas Henley, The Thought Spot, Autistic AF.... These came to mind and I think RUclips will recommend you more, the more you watch.
bot
@@peterbelanger4094 no I’m not
@@peterbelanger4094 What kind of bot would that be? 🤣
I personally like the channels "I'm autistic, now what?" and "Autistic AF" (that was already mentioned). Thanks's for asking the question. I found some new channels to check put for myself 😀
Did you hear about the sensitive burglar?
He takes things personally... 😅
All of this was super helpful and informative. Even with reminding us that we all have different perspectives. I also really enjoy Connor’s videos too. I relate to both of your content so much. I can’t wait for the discord server. I will definitely join that!
Listening to your audio book on Audible. Very good !!.
Love the bee motif for your logo :)
Some of the best "autism" communities I've found on the internet (more specifically RUclips channels) are the ones that are not about autism. Not that communities like this one in Paige's channel are bad, there is a lot of very good ones. But man... It's the special interests, you know? Videos about my special interests, that happen to be a bunch of other people's special interests as well. There is no better way to unify people that think alike and get along well. What was my surprise to discover that most of the people I followed were autistic, or that my autistic friend (in real life) also would follow the same channels for years while we NEVER talked about them to each other before!!!! Mind blowing. Apparently we (NDs) just tend to gravitate towards one another.
I've recently been diagnosed AuDHD, but have been here for years now loyal to the autism content 😂. I felt that anger so many times. Really, just frustration because I couldn't get a diagnosis or treatment for such a long time, no hope to be able to get it one day. It was really a hell hole. Even if I didn't comment anything, I was so frustrated, it all just made me feel bad either way. But at the same time, a lot of times it makes me feel so seen and validated. So I couldn't get apart from it. Eventually things in my life got better, and I stopped hunting the internet down for answers, so I was then more calm. I could then avoid the online places that were toxic to me, and go to the wholessome ones, that happened to be my special interests (arts, crafts and nature mostly, but new ones are found every now and then). The algorithm really does it's work. Almost every time I find a lot of autistic and or ADHD people in these places. And it's the best! We like the same things!
When you throw a tennis ball at the crowd at a sci fi convention there's about a 50% chance that you'll hit a fellow autistic... 🙂
I’ve felt the anger sometimes, too. We’ve been so mislabeled, ab*sed, and ignored, because it’s easy, because our communication is, by definition, wonky. I hope it will get better, though! 😮💨
There is no such thing as a "community",it is an illusion.
@@peterbelanger4094 You think, "There is no such thing as a Community, it is an illusion?"
How so?
Convince me?
I am all eyes, technically.✨
Peter is a troll.@@PrinceYahoshuaBanIsrael
Hello Herman, it bee nice to meet you!!! 🐝
Love Bees! My first tattoo was a Bee!
Other points that support a (European honey) Bee for your brand...
- Non-verbal communication: Bees communicate via pheromone and dance!
- Patterns and Structure: Their honeycomb is hexagonal for good reason
- Routines and Rituals: They tend to forage for pollen in the morning and nectar in the afternoon, but must perform an 'Orientation Flight' before leaving the hive for the first time (or after change)
- Meltdowns and Fear: People are often scared of being stung by a Bee, though Bees tend to only sting when threatened (ending up hurt themselves), and they can learn to trust safe people
- Community and Support: Bees all contribute to the common good, and even have a healthcare system!
- Value: Humanity and the planet need Bees (and other pollinators) to survive.
To elaborate (in case anyone was curious)...
Bees inform each other of sources of nectar by wiggling (flapping/rocking?) while walking in circles (pacing?), where the size of the wiggle indicates their enthusiasm (amount of pollen/nectar) and the circles communicate the distance/location.
Hexagons minimise the amount of wax (perimeter) needed to store the maximum amount of honey (area) while being able to be packed together without gaps (a regular tessellation). Plus researchers have found Bees can compute addition/subtraction and understand the concept of zero.
Orientation flights are when they fly in front of the hive, just a short distance away from the hive, flying in circles and above and below the hive, enabling the Bee to memorise the precise location of the hive with relation to geographic landmarks. These flights usually take place during warm afternoons, when no winds occur.
Research shows bees can learn to recognise and trust their beekeepers. Stings are most likely when someone accidentally crushes or traps a Bee (they can accidentally fly into clothes or hair), if the person is moving near the hive or moving a lot (seem aggressive) and/or wearing dark clothes (resembling a predator), or have upset some other Bee recently (pheromones last on clothes and skin). Bees are not aggressive though, they don't go looking for fights, a sting is an attempt to survive. The structure of human skin means a Bee's stinger will most often get stuck, so unfortunately the Bee rarely does survive.
Bees don't just eat honey, they also make something called 'bee bread' which maintains hive health. For the bee bread to support the hive, they need a variety of pollen, which is one reason bees struggle when surrounded by large mono-culture farms.
Humans tend to forget that we can't exist on our own, we need ecological diversity (just like the Bees). Similarly though, we need human diversity too. Different people to play different roles, all of which are critical for health and survival.
Then just for funs, Bees can learn to play soccer (football)... You're welcome :P
As an early dx autistic with level 3 and high support needs autism , I cannot relate to most "autistic spaces". The whole community seems to be late dx autistic folks, many of whom have whole lives before they even know they had asd. Where for me even if I didn't know I still wouldnt have a life. While it is great to finally have a name for while you've been struggling your entire life. The high support needs autistics are over looked and kinda just exist here in the backround. i just can't relate to online autistic experiences. It is a vast spectrum, and depending on where you are on it life will look so very different.
It can be really tricky finding higher support needs Autistic online. There are many accounts esp. on insta and tumblr, but it's just all overpowered by lower support need white folks. I recommend following @getaway_autist_mobile and @angry_autist and go from there! ✨ When you follow someone, you get recommendations of similar accounts. But this truly is an issue and higher support needs/ lower income/ POC etc. Autistics are so underrepresented in the media (esp. in a neuroaffirming way).
I loved the logo ideia, makes so much sense for you, please don't change
Great video! And I’m off to continue your book, new month new Spotify credit 👍🏻
Hey Paige i have to say youve nailed that speech 💯💯 and thank you so much for you having my time to watch this and ive learned all about Autism as i am Autistic myself and yep i do hate it so much but sure what can you do, its life at the end of the day, but I definitely agree the fact you said that all Autistic people need to be included and also have the chance to speak out and tell them about their experience and any childhood traumas that they've dealt with at the past and I really love your videos Paige and I've been a fan of your RUclips for 3 years but havent watched them in god knows how long but I just wanted to see how you're keeping and I'd really love to have a friend just like you and i have to say that you're such a lovely and genuine person, but anyways keep up the content I'm so happy for you ❤❤❤❤💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽💯💯💯💯🤩🤩🤩🤩😊😊😊😊💓💓💓💓
My parents don’t think I have autism but they know a lot and are very supportive but I have don’t almost a years worth of research. I feel like I am a fraud and haven’t told a doctor yet but I really don’t know what to do. I do have adhd so things will look different but I just have a feeling that I am subconsciously faking to be part of a group. Anyone with offer able help I would really appreciate it.
Have you tried taking the RAADS-R? It is a free screening test available online designed to pick up on autistic adults who weren’t diagnosed in childhood. ❤
The only thing I can tell you is that you shouldn't let you get influenced too much by what other people think. If you did your research and identify with autism, you very likely are autistic. It is extremely rare that people who took the time to educate themselves and identify with autism are wrong. So don't let other people make you doubt yourself. Unfortunately that's easier said than done and it doesn't automatically lead to you getting diagnosed. There's even a chance that professionals might not diagnose you correctly, because, quite frankly, a lot of professionals know way too little about autism and have weird ideas about it. I know that from experience and a lot of stories I heard so far. I don't know your specific situation and your options, but please don't give up. To know this about yourself is extremely important for your mental health and your life in general. If you need more support, I would suggest you should find an autistic community with people that are similar to you, for example people that also have ADHD. I am sure are a lot of people in a similar situation to yours. I wish you the best of luck!
In the discord community I'm in there are very conflicting emotions and opinions about Paige. One of the biggest things I see is about Paige being wrong and/or having too strong opinions that might or might not be harmful. But I just think (and maybe that's my young rebellion phase showing up a bit too late), I'm so sick of people just repeating and copy pasting the same old opinions just because they are mild and widely accepted. I want the wild opinions. I love seeing people who have weird thoughts and arrive to weird conclusions, no matter if they're wrong or right.
I don't know where this idea that everyone who posts anything must be super informed about all sides of things and adopt the most widely accepted opinion. This doesn't lead anywhere. This isn't a discussion. I want to hear the wrong opinions. To be clear, I'm not talking about people who just say wild stuff to rile other people up, but if it's genuinely a thought or opinion someone wants to express or even explore just by saying it out loud, I don't understand what's so wrong about that. Or why we have to take everyone's expression and exploration as gospel and assume they are trying to convince and harm other people.
That's why I like Paige. Because I know every time I click on a video, I'm getting real. I'm getting an exploration, I'm hearing something I might not have thought before. Or something I've thought about before that I thought is so wild, no one else has thought about.
PS: I really like the bee metaphor and I need it to be a thing! It's so cute and relatable and ... I hate bees, I'm deathly scared of them, just the noise they make or the possibility of one landing on me almost causes a panic attack, but I LOVE THE IDEA! I relate to the buzzing random thoughts and I love the idea that we're all part of a hive, each of us doing their own little bee thing.
TLDR: I like unique people, I like Paige, I love the bee symbol.
Supergood Bikers for Autism was the first group I connected with, if you happen to have a special interest in motorbikes this one is really good and they are all amazing people!
@23:00 the psychology about judgement you gave there is that only a neurotypical thing because when I have a “judgement” it’s just an observation I don’t think it has to do with my own incecutities. But I have alexythimia so I could be wrong and I just never correlated them before
Rhett McLaughlin vibes in so many of Paige's maneurisms! Cool
Nice bee drawing.
I've always wanted to fly as well! From very young!
33:27 What scares me is that I often think the same about political opinions but some of them literally oppose everything I stand for and are rooted in fear mongering and hate. Idk what to do with that.
Had lots of friends who were autistic by varying degrees. Had some delusions now from an event that slapped me in a prison of that mistake. Anger confusion and cheating happened. A similar event to a close event. And friendship. I had hell and kindness with the community. I'm an olden but found a great friend who may not be around. There was hell and friendship
Somehow, I got so much better at understanding social clues once I got more socially anxious.. or maybe it was the other way around. I realised that things went wrong whenever I opened my mouth, so I learned to just.. not. And it's taken years to even slightly get over that ...
My thing is, I don't really mask my autism but I do mask myself. I don't talk to people, which doesn't make me come across as normal, but then again I really want to talk to people, because.. I'm just lonely, man.
I’m sure that so many more people meet the autism criteria than are currently diagnosed. However, I don’t think that all of those people actually have a neuro developmental disability. And maybe the line between autistic and allistic is more blurred and thin than the community currently acknowledges. The important thing to remember is that neuroscience and psychology currently base diagnosis in behavioral symptoms and self reporting instead of actual bio markers specific to one or a select few conditions. Very few fields of medicine are this imprecise and it can lead to a lot of misdiagnosis, under diagnosis, and over diagnosis of neurodevelopmental and mental health conditions.
I agree that diagnosis is not very precise. But if you meet the criteria for autism then you by definition have a neuro developmental disorder. Maybe in the future things will change but as of now those are the definitions.
mmm, that's the whole point on the discussion about "medical model" and "social model" of health and disabilities. It's a political one (we know that any human activity- including science and medicine- is a also political/ethical thing. A good example: malaria -even hunger_ still kills millions in 3rd world countries, but a huge amount of resources are put into studies to "cure cancer", or autism (genetics). That's a political issue)
What about a small section of honey comb, with the bee wings on one side either forming a letter B, or a letter P.
You're alluding to the presence of a bee, without there beeing one, but still keeping the parts you like (^_^) and it doesn't look the same as someone else's logo.
Sending you love and gratitude, for sharing your experiences, raising awareness,and thanks to the internet, I have been able to find information, validation and understanding.
Omg the bee thing, I literally say 'My head feels like a jar full of angry bees'
i was on a date with someone last year and they had asked me if "i had ever been abroad before"
and i had an immediately very puzzeled look on my face, chuckled sarcastically and replied, "no, i've been pretty certain im a man my whole life, and also, i think that "broad" is an interesting word choice for 2023"
and it ended up being this awkward-for-me moment where they 100% thought i was being funny and witty and played into it and i had to mask my literal misunderstanding of their question and tip-toed through the remaining 2 hours of the evening conversations and nearly second-guessed everything i was saying and doing. Felt like an episode of black mirror.
I started looking into neuro-diversity the next day
im now 29 and positively AuDHD -__-
I love your videos, they are very informative and helpful 🙂. Have a great rest of your day 👋.
RSD is so so hard I am struggle hard now it comes in phases for me I get in a good place with therapy and can not let those thoughts take over then spots where I am low and it takes over 🙃
Autism-speak is kinda like Entish, if it's worth saying, it's worth taking a very long time to say...
Going to be the first thing I watch in the morning on #replay crew cos you have my girl @brandichurchwell coming on but I live in the UK and I will be sleeping!!
Slightly surprised by some of the late diagnosed people here saying they can't identify if they've ever interacted with autistic people, as I've been found that they/we tend to congregate in similar circles and interest groups (I haven't expressed enough traits to actually be diagnosed, but specialists say I definitely present with a few). I hang out a bit in gamer bars, so a lot of us made friends with similarly 'quirky' people there, many either already diagnosed, or diagnosed much later. And now I'm back at uni studying engineering, and if less than 50% of us are Autistic, ADHD or any other form or combination of neurospicy, diagnosed or not, I'd be quite surprised.
Give it some time. Hopefully the broader community is starting to accept and appreciate the wider range of human experience and more people will reawaken and mask less.
They probably have interacted with other autistic people they just don't know it. I got diagnosed at age 47 but only one friend was diagnosed in her early 40's before me. Some of my other friends and former friends probably are autistic but they aren't diagnosed. There are probably more undiagnosed autistic people my age (49) than diagnosed people.
I wasn't diagnosed until my late 30's. . . We thought it was aspergers before hand but eventually I got tested.
lol I keep having the end of the video song stuck in my head so I go watch another video just to listen to the end of the video song ha ha love your content though it’s some of my favorite
I needed this thank you
I really love the bee hive analogy btw
Thank you very much Paige!
I'm planning on buying you're book soon!
Yes! I have some suspicions about OCPD and BPD.
AFAB folks, in particular, tend to get diagnosed with everything EXCEPT autism; it can happen to AMAB, too, though; my late husband was diagnosed schizophrenic, OCD, schizoaffective, AND bipolar at various times; never ADHD or autistic, though I now believe he was both. 😬
That happened to me. I was misdiagnosed with 10 mental illnesses. @@misspat7555
I was misdiagnosed with 10 mental illnesses. Before I got diagnosed with autism.
@realpaigelayle LOGO CHANGE SUGGESTION: make a butterfly with those fairy looking wings. Why? Bc that would be a social butterfly doing its things but with different wings, different operative system, etc, but still communicating in its own social standard. Also, the butterfly won't look as feminine with those wings and you get the cool fairy look!
I'm 27, autistic and black. and i give up now. 🙂
I’m 42, autistic, ADHD-PI, twice-exceptional, southpaw, divorced, widowed, raising a kid from each marriage, white, and pan. Don’t give up! Life can get better! ❤
I read 27% 🥲
Am i the only one wishing that if every person would have some kind of label carrying around openly all the time would make the world so much easier? (like this one is autistic, this one has adhd, this one is depressed, this one is NT, this one is mute, this one is deaf, etc.) If everyone was made of glass there would be so much more understanding (at least i would assume).
I estimate that 10% of people are autistic. 10% are ADHD (with over 50% overlap), 10% are left-handed (probably more than statistical overlap), 10% of people are gay/lesbian (probably more just generally queer); 10% is a good percent! 😊
There's a recent study where they found out you can actually tell if someone is autistic by scanning their retina and then let it analyse by an AI. They found that 1 in 36 people they scanned were autistic (about 3%), which matches with the percentage of children that are currently diagnosed with autism. I found that very interesting.
On the other hand, it doesn't match my personal experience. I also think that 10 to 20% sounds more in line with what I see around me. But maybe we have a biased view, because if you're autistic it is highly likely that most of your friends and family are autistic, too.
And as a sidenote, I personally think ADHD and autism can't really be kept separate and it will soon turn out that they are different versions of the same phenomenon.
Good video Paige. Continue on your road on getting the gold play button
15:14 I was diagnosed as OCPD when I was 17 years old. I'm self-dx autism now, and doctor-dx childhood trauma/CPTSD. don't attack me like this hahahah
Great video :)), i agree so mutch about talking it out to people w other perspectives. You might not agree but its important too try and understand the other side so that you can get a nuanced understanding and try to fix things. It is hard but that’s what makes us improve.
Hey Paige! I really wanna read/listen to your book on audible, but it’s not available in my region (Norway) 🥺 I’m not able to read physical books because of my ADHD, but audiobooks work wonders for me, as I’m able to move and be active at the same time. I’d be super grateful if your book would be available to our market. Thanks a million ❤
Your logo looks exactly like Birt's Bees.
I agree with a 20% estimate.
I agree that it seems that Autism is the main umbrella, and so many other things are under it... including ADHD, RSD, etc.
I agree that I often let you talk to me for too long... like... a 40 minute video?
21:14 Also, lots of autistic people have proprioception issues, which can increase the risk of injuries while dancing or doing other types of physical activity, right?
yes! ✨
Love ur videos but this is my favorite one ❤🌺🐝
- from a 30 something year old autistic
great video, had to comment because your hair is frickin gorgeous
I am a hurting autistic that gets attacked emotionally every day cause I live with family
I lov your videos Paige
Don't do it, as far as living with family goes! They'll drag you down until the end of your existence! I'm blind, my mom and I do not get along!
She has said so many inappropriate things about me, that I'm fat, that she wants to put me into a group home etc etc. Even that she wanted to buy a "family compound" that I would have to move into, and that I wouldn't have a choice.
Love your videos!
Don't mind me, just commenting for the algorithm
So cute and full of life,,
My blood tubes are low 56 or something, and Autistic, probably ADHD. And slow and tired. But you have hit on something "pots" my mum fulls over when she stands up at 87 Doctors say sait but no other reasons, I see she's autistic but no one else sees it. Like we have a 30min phone call and say 10 words !!!
I love the logic to it all. wish I could remember what I learn.
I don't know if it's so much that autistics typically aren't taught emotional regulation but that many people in general aren't, and not so much that autistics aren't good at it but that we tend to be more sensitive to its effects and lack some of the social tools to manage things more effectively in these unsuitable social spaces cultured for NT's.
And at the same time we have other related and/or affecting issues that NT's typically don't have to deal with, which compounds our difficulties whilst also complicating attempts to resolve things.
Regarding asking for clarification, I think that's more a combination of,
1) an expression of focusing on details and requiring a more fleshed-out idea because,
2) we tend to be less ideologically confined to cultural convention and open to farther-reaching possibilities, so we need more detail in order to refine someone's idea into something specific-enough for us to work with,
3) because we tend to focus/tunnel-vision on things, the need to consider things from someone else's perspective tends to fall by the way-side,
4) socializing tend to over-draw our cognitive bandwidth, making it more difficult to fully employ our brain in the moment. I always say that the second I open my mouth, my IQ drops by double digits.
My solution was to just give up on doing social things perfectly the first time, and instead focus on just working on things over time and being satisfied with 'good enough' results that satisfy the bredth of what I'd like to communicate.
Not the most compatible methodology for hasty, perfection-seeking others, but it works for me, makes me more able overall, and if I have to tolerate other people do much they can well tolerate me as well. And the intolerant can go eat s- ... well you know what I mean. Can't win everyone over so might aswell stop worrying about the more vehemently antisocial among us.
Regarding the anger thing, although it can be considered a stage, I've found many who seemingly not only haven't ever grown out of it as but made it a part of them.
But yes, I too went through that stage lol. I got out of it because it was just making me sick and helping with nothing. Well, it did help out at one time, keeping me alive and giving me the time to improve various physical and mental health issues. But after awhile it was just pure erosion. Immersing yourself in it might feel good, but it didn't do good.
I just tell others to let themselves feel their emotions because they're justified in them, but don't sink in it, don't make decisions with it, and when they can, try to just let go and get on with your life.
Oo 'comment below' topic. Well all I expect is people to put effort into communication, not use insults, and talk WITH their conversation partner, not AT them.
I've spent more time reading in my life than sleeping so my writing tends to be pretty above average and not at all fair to expect others to match, but there IS a certain minimum of writing skills at which attempting communication just becomes a waste of personal resources. If nothing constructive or healthy can be gained from communicating with a specific person, what's the point?
I used to be very active in philosophy forums and after years of reading exchanges the signs of doomed conversations and poor conversation partners is pretty clear.
It perhaps isn't fair to people struggling with self-regulation, who missed crucial learning opportunities / learned bad habits, or who were just born with more natural deficiencies than others, making healthy and constructive conversation a huge challenge.... but I just don't have the leeway to bend and put myself so much at the service of others (at detriment to myself). I deserve a certain minimum of health and quality of life. I grew up trying to fit into the social dynamic toxic, abusive people and just.... yeah, no more.
My general philosophy of life, these days, is that I can only give what I have in excess. If I don't even have enough for me I'll never be able to improve my circumstance and improve how much I can give to others. But the healthier and happier I am, the more I'll be able to give. So that's my focus can only say I'm sorry when I'm too poor for even myself and stand resolute on my boundaries.
My emotions are more extreme than most people so they are harder to regulate.
Really educational video thanks
When people say words like community or joining or group I feel like running away very quickly and hiding or joining so I can study their cult.
Not all communities are cults.
@@Catlily5 i know. that's not what i actually said. Its just how those words make me feel. Its trauma.
I'm so gonna do that buzz noise when I have #squirrel moments. ( ref Dough the talking dog, in the film up). 🐝
Limerence must be my obsession with cultural historian Piero Scaruffi.
My personal estimate is 1 in 5 when including ADHD & Autism as an umbrella neurotype. In my personal life, especially in queer spaces, the ratios feel closer to 1 in 3. Studies have shown autistic humans are more likely to be queer to begin with, we don't love social constructs to start!
They can't see what you mean to me my little queen bee....Grand Funk Railroad
I’m only autistic (not ADHD) and I definitely have rejection sensitive dysphoria 😅
Hi Paige
My experience with Autism was challenging but I got through with it
If it helps any with your thoughts on dancers and neurodiverse, my sister grew up with and taught ballet, and she's ND herself lol
I thought traits like RSD and auditory processing disorder were traits linked to having Autism or ADHD or both. Bc I definitely believe I have RSD because it's BAD how the slightest critique or disagreement makes my entire body drown in anxiety and elevated heartbeat. Same for APD, I feel like there was no explanation for my parents why I as a kid didn't hear things 100% but the things I did hear I heard perfectly. I've made people angry for asking them to repeat themselves, not because I didn't hear, but because the syllables didn't connect to a word in my brain. Sometimes I can even wait a few seconds and that's when the word clicks and I have to interrupt the person repeating themselves because "nvm I heard now" hahahah
So like, are we supposed to get these traits in our diagnostic journal or are they just a package deal with AuDHD? bc I like to think of it as the latter part. Same with the spectrum, the severity of these traits can differ, but I do think they're way too linked to not be the same diagnosis.