Saying No doesn't require an explanation. Explaining invites a challenge to your reasons and may lead to an argument because the other isn't getting their way. Your purpose in life isn't to make everyone happy at your own expense. I always try to find a compromise but if I chose to say no, I stand firm. A lot of people seem to forget that they are also a person in the mix. Their own opinions and desires matter too. Learn to say no and be firm if that's how you feel.
I like this woman's comments. Unfortunately there are some people who are extremely nosey and don't get the hint that you don't want to answer their questions, then you have to be direct and tell them that they are being intrusive.
Like it! Thanks.. What really irks me is people telling you what to do when they don't even know you.. just trying to push people around . I don t get it but it really irks me.
I seem to be a magnet for people who have bats in the belfry. If I am at a bus stop, shopping centre, on public transport or at a church morning tea. If I am there they will crawl out of their straight jacket to attack me. I must walk around with the word idiot in neon above my head or something. I seem to spend the whole day dodging their idiocy. A good GO AWAY! always works, however an assertive stare and Stonewalling is the best way for me. We don't have to be passive with people life is hard enough as it is .
A lot of families are full of narcissist and toxic people. You have to learn to withdraw from them if you need to. You need to do what is best for you and yours.
My brother-in-law, who thankfully I rarely see, asks a barrage of questions when we do meet, to the point that he's firing his next question before I have time to answer the current one. It makes me uncomfortable and I fee like I'm being interrogated. He's extremely nosey with such poor social skills that he doesn't know it's impolite. So, now I avoid him (knowing what's coming) or deflect and change the subject. Sad but why should I subject myself to it. Asking someone what they earn is in very bad taste. It's no one else's business. What we earn is related to what we do, our experience/skills/education, how productive we are, the value we bring, etc. And, folks, we won't all make the same money. Yes, life is unfair, get used to it. Warren Buffett is a billionaire and I'm not... that's so unfair! (and childish). Instead, as yourself if you're happy with what you earn in relation to what you do, check salary surveys to gauge whether you're being compensated family for what you do and if you're not happy, stop whining to others and look for something else. Grow up.
Especially when First meeting someone, I find a barrage of rapid-fire questions to be exausting; I would much rather warm up to serious issues than get down to the brass tacks right away. If I'm in a job interview and I signed up for it, then that's okay and expected, to a certain point. Yet even in the context of a job interview, there are certain topics that are off-limits.
I've been guilty of caving in when dealing with some intrusive people, and later being angry with myself for answering their questions. Years ago, I might snap at a pushy person. Then I would hear, "Don't speak to me in that tone of voice." Felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Thank God for videos like these. Haha
I have a bad habit of ignoring intrusive and rude questions. When someone is being pushy or rude to me, I suddenly fail to hear it, and therefore don't respond to what they say 😉 Because no response is better than a snarky one and it also conserves my energy
People keep asking me favours ... I’m in the middle of doing one all for the earnings of £5 per week to empty a dehumidifier daily at a friends empty flat. Ok it’s only round the corner , but as another friend said, it’s an insult for £5 per week .. Next time I’m going to say No, unless it really suits or benefits me .
My neighbor been crushing me lately ... overwhelming solicitation to hang out and I don’t like the guy... always comes homes banged up drunk, bruises from dive bar fights.... wonders why I don’t ... just stood in shock when I told him to back off
Good for you, but I would be careful and make sure you have good locks on your doors and windows and NEVER let him inside your house. Try to have a male friend round a couple of times so he thinks you've got a boyfriend.
It's been Quite the Reverse affect for me, having noted over 35 Toxic Traits from a Prior Friendship, based on my Perspective that would be Gas Lighted anyway, And having him deflect me as having Poor Social Skills, For subjectively being triggered, My Personality Is wired to my Character and train of perceived Thoughts not His, Sometimes Narcissist's like to also point the finger and label others as Narcissistic too Always labels me as making Excuses, and Undermines my Personal known Worries and gradual efforts to change, which Is very Impossible without "Driving" that's how I feel, Driving Implement's Punctuality, Reliability, Mobility, Responsibility, Independence, and Ability to Alter Time more effectively, when enabled to make choices as an Individual on your Own Given Without Genuine Personal Direction, for what you want to do In your Life, But maybe a Few Idea's and without a Strong Alternative to Landing Payed Entry Employment, Depending on a Job Recruiter and Volunteer Hope Unless I Plan to Study, And being treated as that Life comes Easy, By the "Set Narcissist" who which had Fortunate" and "Suitable" Employment, that his been able to maintain and Re-New Contract's to keep Trying to get my Driving but apparently I'm not according to that source, Other Issues are Oppressing me to accumulate my Driving with constant Set Backs and Regulation Restraints and Reviews - Which I'm not wanting and Is out of my Will of Control SO despite wanting more and trying to get the First Things together, I'm apparently to blame
This lady is really good - she's refusing to be pushed but at the same time is lovely and polite.
Yep. She is wise.
exactly my thought and compliment to her !
Saying No doesn't require an explanation. Explaining invites a challenge to your reasons and may lead to an argument because the other isn't getting their way. Your purpose in life isn't to make everyone happy at your own expense. I always try to find a compromise but if I chose to say no, I stand firm. A lot of people seem to forget that they are also a person in the mix. Their own opinions and desires matter too. Learn to say no and be firm if that's how you feel.
That's it you don't have to explain anything to anyone if you don't want to!
This is a really good video, and really good info. I'm glad the Lord blessed me to see it.
Amen.
Shes awesome...feels good to see someone completely different then the kim kardashians type of guests
I like this woman's comments. Unfortunately there are some people who are extremely nosey and don't get the hint that you don't want to answer their questions, then you have to be direct and tell them that they are being intrusive.
Exactly, and then when you are pretty much forced into being short/terse, they will react as if YOU are being touchy or defensive
What a compassionate woman
Like it! Thanks.. What really irks me is people telling you what to do when they don't even know you.. just trying to push people around . I don t get it but it really irks me.
I seem to be a magnet for people who have bats in the belfry. If I am at a bus stop, shopping centre, on public transport or at a church morning tea. If I am there they will crawl out of their straight jacket to attack me. I must walk around with the word idiot in neon above my head or something. I seem to spend the whole day dodging their idiocy. A good GO AWAY! always works, however an assertive stare and Stonewalling is the best way for me. We don't have to be passive with people life is hard enough as it is .
This lady is extremely helpful ❤
Helpful to view before the holidays. I have certainly been asked some of these questions before!
These same intrusive people are probably the same ones you see downtown hawking smartphones on street corners.
My mother always makes excuses for family like these...that they care??
Right families have media too. Especially the older generation they don't have social media so they must gossip
A lot of families are full of narcissist and toxic people. You have to learn to withdraw from them if you need to. You need to do what is best for you and yours.
My brother-in-law, who thankfully I rarely see, asks a barrage of questions when we do meet, to the point that he's firing his next question before I have time to answer the current one. It makes me uncomfortable and I fee like I'm being interrogated. He's extremely nosey with such poor social skills that he doesn't know it's impolite. So, now I avoid him (knowing what's coming) or deflect and change the subject. Sad but why should I subject myself to it. Asking someone what they earn is in very bad taste. It's no one else's business. What we earn is related to what we do, our experience/skills/education, how productive we are, the value we bring, etc. And, folks, we won't all make the same money. Yes, life is unfair, get used to it. Warren Buffett is a billionaire and I'm not... that's so unfair! (and childish). Instead, as yourself if you're happy with what you earn in relation to what you do, check salary surveys to gauge whether you're being compensated family for what you do and if you're not happy, stop whining to others and look for something else. Grow up.
Your brother in law sounds very jealous of you, as perhaps he knows that you earn more than him. Great that you can avoid him as much as possible.
Especially when First meeting someone, I find a barrage of rapid-fire questions to be exausting; I would much rather warm up to serious issues than get down to the brass tacks right away. If I'm in a job interview and I signed up for it, then that's okay and expected, to a certain point. Yet even in the context of a job interview, there are certain topics that are off-limits.
I've been guilty of caving in when dealing with some intrusive people, and later being angry with myself for answering their questions. Years ago, I might snap at a pushy person. Then I would hear, "Don't speak to me in that tone of voice." Felt like I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Thank God for videos like these. Haha
I have a bad habit of ignoring intrusive and rude questions. When someone is being pushy or rude to me, I suddenly fail to hear it, and therefore don't respond to what they say 😉 Because no response is better than a snarky one and it also conserves my energy
I made the mistake of doing it to “friends” who I thought really cared about what wa s going on in my life when they were just trying to size me up
A good reply is to say NOYB ,none of your business
People keep asking me favours ... I’m in the middle of doing one all for the earnings of £5 per week to empty a dehumidifier daily at a friends empty flat. Ok it’s only round the corner , but as another friend said, it’s an insult for £5 per week ..
Next time I’m going to say No, unless it really suits or benefits me .
People are getting more rude and intrusive as a society. The things said to me are things my parents used to call "personal remarks".
My neighbor been crushing me lately ... overwhelming solicitation to hang out and I don’t like the guy... always comes homes banged up drunk, bruises from dive bar fights.... wonders why I don’t ... just stood in shock when I told him to back off
keep safe, he sounds scary
Have u told him to get lost yet
Vonda yup... put up a Trump flag and he’s gone .,, I’m invisible to him
Good for you, but I would be careful and make sure you have good locks on your doors and windows and NEVER let him inside your house. Try to have a male friend round a couple of times so he thinks you've got a boyfriend.
It's been Quite the Reverse affect for me, having noted over 35 Toxic Traits from a Prior Friendship, based on my Perspective that would be Gas Lighted anyway, And having him deflect me as having Poor Social Skills, For subjectively being triggered, My Personality Is wired to my Character and train of perceived Thoughts not His, Sometimes Narcissist's like to also point the finger and label others as Narcissistic too
Always labels me as making Excuses, and Undermines my Personal known Worries and gradual efforts to change, which Is very Impossible without "Driving" that's how I feel, Driving Implement's Punctuality, Reliability, Mobility, Responsibility, Independence, and Ability to Alter Time more effectively, when enabled to make choices as an Individual on your Own Given
Without Genuine Personal Direction, for what you want to do In your Life, But maybe a Few Idea's and without a Strong Alternative to Landing Payed Entry Employment, Depending on a Job Recruiter and Volunteer Hope Unless I Plan to Study, And being treated as that Life comes Easy, By the "Set Narcissist" who which had Fortunate" and "Suitable" Employment, that his been able to maintain and Re-New Contract's to keep
Trying to get my Driving but apparently I'm not according to that source, Other Issues are Oppressing me to accumulate my Driving with constant Set Backs and Regulation Restraints and Reviews - Which I'm not wanting and Is out of my Will of Control
SO despite wanting more and trying to get the First Things together, I'm apparently to blame
Great video! I wonder if we should wait to set boundaries in person or if we can set boundaries through text. Is one method preferred over the over?
I think a text is good, especially if the intrusive person texted you the inquiry in the first place~
Asking how much you earn just say enough to live on!
I don’t like Intrusive people who try to hide behind I just wanna help that’s why I need to know or lie
It's hard isn't it to recognise when help is genuine or just an excuse to be nosy!
What if you live with one?