I liked this movie so much i bought the DVD because it blows open the myth and truth about so called " open " relationships which end as soon as their opened. When i was married my wifes body was something private and special for me alone i thought, and im sure most men feel the same if they really love their wifes. Now imagine a strange man enjoying all the pleasures of your wife that you enjoyed including those things he is doing with her that shes not telling you about. If you really love your wife are you tough enough to take that kind of mental torture?
Perhaps the intention of this movie is partly to be an criticism of the concept of open relationships, but I took it to be a look at character flaws that destroy any relationship (i.e. Immaturity and impatience like Novaly points out), and the myopic ways which people try to mend them. Some people try to mend failing relationships by making a relationship open when they weren't initially, or treating relationships soley as transactions like Larry does (I've even heard that some couples try to have a baby to save a relationship). (Larry's 2 failed relationships, bitterness and cynicism likely lead Larry to treat relationships in a coldly pragmatic way, which left him slumped and alone sat on the bed at the end of the movie. It's clear Larry wants companionship, but he's become too cold to get companionship.) I think open relationships can work long term (and there is research showing it can .e.g studies about swingers), but not if people are using it to cover up a poor foundation. They had built no healthy foundation, and like Novaly points out, both of them wanted a meaningful relationships but didn't have the character traits to make them work. Something I've learned is that to make an open relationship work (which I'm guessing you know is different to polyamory), the main relationship is romantic, whereas the other relationships are affectionate or sexual only, but you don't build a life with them like you do a partner. Gabby met his child, and stayed at his home with a child, that is a 2nd relationship. By spending time with Larry talking, getting a personalized gift from him, and bonding with his daughter, she was creating a parallel romantic relationship. Larry called her out on that, but she answered immaturely; Gabby: "he's my boyfriend", Larry: "what am I", Gabby "you're my boat man". As well as impatience, their relationship issues were caused by them emotionally sharing and bonding with people outside of each other. Initially the intention was to have sex with other people only, but Gabby bonded with Larry and his daughter, and Martin shared something deeply vulnerable with Blake and his ex-wife that he never shared with Gabby. Gabby wanted Martin to share with her, but he wouldn't, and Martin wanted Larry to only bond with him, but she didn't. Martin wouldn't share feelings about his hurts, and Gabby wouldn't share that she was romantically bonding with another man (Martin figured it out when she was reluctant to say that she came while sleeping with him). IMO neither one of them really have the psychology to be in a open relationship, but - like the studies show - that isn't true for everyone.
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I liked this movie so much i bought the DVD because it blows open the myth and truth about so called " open " relationships which end as soon as their opened. When i was married my wifes body was something private and special for me alone i thought, and im sure most men feel the same if they really love their wifes. Now imagine a strange man enjoying all the pleasures of your wife that you enjoyed including those things he is doing with her that shes not telling you about. If you really love your wife are you tough enough to take that kind of mental torture?
Perhaps the intention of this movie is partly to be an criticism of the concept of open relationships, but I took it to be a look at character flaws that destroy any relationship (i.e. Immaturity and impatience like Novaly points out), and the myopic ways which people try to mend them. Some people try to mend failing relationships by making a relationship open when they weren't initially, or treating relationships soley as transactions like Larry does (I've even heard that some couples try to have a baby to save a relationship). (Larry's 2 failed relationships, bitterness and cynicism likely lead Larry to treat relationships in a coldly pragmatic way, which left him slumped and alone sat on the bed at the end of the movie. It's clear Larry wants companionship, but he's become too cold to get companionship.)
I think open relationships can work long term (and there is research showing it can .e.g studies about swingers), but not if people are using it to cover up a poor foundation. They had built no healthy foundation, and like Novaly points out, both of them wanted a meaningful relationships but didn't have the character traits to make them work. Something I've learned is that to make an open relationship work (which I'm guessing you know is different to polyamory), the main relationship is romantic, whereas the other relationships are affectionate or sexual only, but you don't build a life with them like you do a partner. Gabby met his child, and stayed at his home with a child, that is a 2nd relationship. By spending time with Larry talking, getting a personalized gift from him, and bonding with his daughter, she was creating a parallel romantic relationship. Larry called her out on that, but she answered immaturely; Gabby: "he's my boyfriend", Larry: "what am I", Gabby "you're my boat man".
As well as impatience, their relationship issues were caused by them emotionally sharing and bonding with people outside of each other. Initially the intention was to have sex with other people only, but Gabby bonded with Larry and his daughter, and Martin shared something deeply vulnerable with Blake and his ex-wife that he never shared with Gabby. Gabby wanted Martin to share with her, but he wouldn't, and Martin wanted Larry to only bond with him, but she didn't. Martin wouldn't share feelings about his hurts, and Gabby wouldn't share that she was romantically bonding with another man (Martin figured it out when she was reluctant to say that she came while sleeping with him).
IMO neither one of them really have the psychology to be in a open relationship, but - like the studies show - that isn't true for everyone.
Another video of mine on a similar topic ruclips.net/video/P8FG7G0CN_Y/видео.html
Habits are you