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MST3k 623 - The Amazing Transparent Man
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- Опубликовано: 8 июн 2011
- A mad scientist with a desire for money and doing questionable things to small furry animals recruits an ex-con for a heist of plutonium from a poorly-guarded bank, which is apparently where stockpiles of plutonium are stored. Hilarity and fallout ensue.
/ mst3k
mst3konline.blo... - a list of every episode available for online streaming!
To honor one of the best (and my personal favorite) host sketches, this was my best attempt to transcribe the llama sketch. Keep in mind at the end Crow's screeches make it hard to hear Servo so I probably got some of it wrong.
Servo: "So you folks wanna touch the llama ‘uh? That’s righ’ ‘uh. Yah wanna touch this ol’ llama? You just go ‘ight ‘head. You can touch the ol’ llama all you want. You can touch the llama all night till hell freezes over! Hahaha! Not me though. Nah-aw. No sir-re-bob. I wouldn’t touch the ol’ thing. Llama hasn’t been feeling so good. Whew! Smells funny too. Whoa! Smells really kinda rank, yah know? But you can touch it if yah want. Ehehe. Ain’t no law says you can’t. Ain’t that right, Mikey? Ain’t theres no laws that say folks can’t touch this smelly ol’ llama if they want? Huh, Mikey, huh?"
Mike: "You people bring matches for Mikey?"
Servo: "You shut up Mikey, you shut up! You folks don't give no matches to Mikey! Ya hear me?! Ya hear me?! I don't care what Mikey say or Mikey do! Don't give 'im no matches! I don't care if Mikey ends up crawlin' in through yer window stark naked with a big ol' knife! Don't you give no matches to Mikey! Don't you give 'im no matches! Shut up, Mikey! Shut up, llama! Just shut up! Don't give 'im no matches! No matches to Mikey! Shut up, Mikey!"
Crow: EEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEE EEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEE
Fantastic
Maybe I’m just extra stoned but the fact that you took the time to type it out and the sketch itself easily stands alone; my commendations.
@@fluffnstuph85 I wish I was any stoned, really...
Please don’t give up! No days of our years!
gotta love these old Pearl cameos before she was canon
Alias "Blubber Belly" Cannon
Same with Mike showing up as different characters; they're both great at playing different people
Probably the funniest opening host segment of the entire run.
@22:05 "a Pap smear?" best one
Remember, use gentle pressure, and don't slamtackle the guy with the blowtorch the way Charlie did.
"This guy has a flame in his hand. Let's aggressively approach him and shove him"
Wouldn't it be a much better idea to just have, like, a long-ish stick at hand to gently poke the dude with? You can still do "gentle pressure" without having anybody within flash-frying distance.
Come at him with your own blowtorch.
@@gusrubio489 "God created man, Union Pacific made men equal."
@@notinspectorgadget -"and the Official Blowtorch Guy Poking Stick made men safer."
The actor who plays the major does a really convincing job of being roughed up by the invisible man. That's probably the best thing I can say about this movie.
He wasn’t an “invisible man” because that would have been a copyright violation.
He was a “transparent man,” and an “amazing” one, to boot.
"Okay, so what's my motivation?"
"Well, you're Faust and you're a bank robber, a vicious criminal. As such, we need you to bark out every line like a grumpy grandpa who was unexpectedly awoken from a nap."
"That's the STUPIDEST THING I EVER HEARD!"
"Yes! That's perfect! Okay, go to your mark."
"Bah..."
"And keep rubbing your neck like that! It adds character."
I love Trace's Crow. He's so curious and innocent, like in the Angels Revenge episode, "Mike, why were the 70s?"
Remember the Christmas episode where Joel gave them presents: A loud, blazing hot-rod for Tom Servo, and some tan slacks for Crow, "that he could grow into!"...then Crow's sniffling, can't-hold-back-the-tears "Thank you for the pants. *boo-hoo-hoo*"
In terms of pure humor, Bill Corbetts Crow was the best. He wasnt limited by innocent curiosity.
and a happy face
@@cumulushalo576 Yeah, Bill's Crow was pretty mischievous, which we can chalk up to what Crow had to have endured while alone on the Satellite of Love for centuries until the others popped back.
Trace's Crow is what keeps me going in times of need. Bill's take was good, sometimes great. But Trace's Crow has been through so many bad movies that he's blissfully indifferent to the effects, Colman Francis' slapped together train wrecks notwithstanding
One of the rare instances of seeing Kevin as Kevin.
I love how the whole Auntie McFrank segment Kevin was trying not to laugh
Frank in a dress is as cute as Servo in anything. I love the arm slap.
He's still only in his 20s here.
@@Backinblackbunny009 ...jesus.
Love MST3K but the short film was so depressing that now I'm thinking is life really worth living. The Amazing Transparent Man is actually a pretty good movie.
Its a terrible movie. This guy with the power to make people invisible has three employees; a senile doctor, some hick with a rifle, and a woman who hates him. And in his genius plan he makes a violent criminal invisible but neglects to restrain him in any way, instantly allowing himself to be overpowered and taken advantage of.
@@nathanpapp432lol the way you've summarized it makes it sound like a mildly amusing Saturday Night Live sketch
@@nathanpapp432 Yeah, I don't know what this "it's a good movie" thing is about.
@@sixgunshauna3486 Only redeeming quality was the effect when he becomes the "Amazingly mostly Transparent Man" was pretty good.
Don’t let the Mads get you down. I’m sending you some hinder 90 to counteract the hypno-helo-static-stasis.
I know all those old tract houses look alike, but that place @ 9:41 really does look like the house Bela Lugosi leaves in "Plan 9 from Outer Space." incidentally, even though the movie "Ed Wood" depicts that house as being Bela's, in real life it was Tor Johnson's place. Time for end comment.
I didn't know that about it being Tor's house, thanks for the interesting tidbit!
Trace's pain/panic screams as Crow always kill me.
"KITTY!" Gets me everytime.
When Mike pets Llama/Crow
He is my favorite Crow (don't tell the others)
You can stop that, Mike.
DON'T GIVE NO MATCHES TO MIKEY!
😂
Much like the 'practical joke' sketch from Track of the Moon Beast I have no idea how Mike doesn't totally lose it during 'pet the llama' sketch.
Hylian Fox These sketches are my favorites, except maybe for Crow's backfiring prank from Screaming Skull. Mike is so scary in Matches for Mikey.
Lots of practice, likely.
I wonder that watching a ton of Mike's sketches.
All I could think of during the short was "Why don't they look?"
you're deep, Ernie
Trains are holy, blameless creatures!
The Llama sketch is the probably the best sketch in the entire series.
After one viewing, all it takes is a still frame of the sketch and I'm in hysterics.
YOU PEOPLE BRING MATCHES FOR MIKEY?
@@mattyboyanderson Yeah, I've seen iT a few times and tonight I was laughing out loud again. As soon as I saw the b & b my spirits lifted.
*NOWHOHO HOLD UP THERE PARDNER*
Hi, I love that skit too, but I was wondering, is it a reference to something else? Like a movie or tv show?
If any other Mysties know, please reply.
Cheers.
@@steveharvey2102 I'm pretty sure it is just a bit they came up with, it's not a reference to anything as far as I'm aware.
That short was so depressing that the people who saw it without MST3K were probably traumatized!
Yes, we are all born to die, we only get 70 days on this Earth (?!?), We all need to go to the railroad Christian Church of our choice, work incredibly dangerous jobs, paid almost nothing, and yet somehow they can afford to buy an entire house on a railroad and part-time waitress job, staring off into space at our reflection in a demonic toaster, our lives shortened by tyrannical, rich robber barons who make condescending safety videos and a priest who is heiling der fuhrer 🤔😃🤷
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I really loved analogkid01's episode posts b/c sometimes they have the commercials. It's so nostalgic.
They left a comment about the process too. They recorded these on VHS and kept them. Years later dubbed them to CDs and then later to flash drives. Finally to RUclips for posterity and our enjoyment. What a pain in the axlerod
Why can't TV's Frank be in every single episode?
And then why can't there be an infinite number of episodes?
And then why can't I have infinite freetime and be immortal?
Because you don't get to choose who lives and who dies. Crow called dibs.
I love this comment
The days of your life are three score and ten (70). I don't know how DaVinci or anybody gets everything done with less than 3 months to live 🤷
🚀 I dated TV's Frank📺
He always had to drive.
No big deal, but he made
me ride in the backseat. 💡
@@faithfulgrl ok is this a joke or not? If true, I hope he didn't come back to Take your Soul... 🤦♂️
The guys were on fire with that railroad short! I had to pause to finish laughing several times.
Kevin Murphy's voice is so unmistakable that when he makes his cameo in this episode there is no doubt that he is the guy who voices Servo. I imagine that a lot of viewers who didn't read the credits were able to figure that out from this episode.
Mike doesn't blink once during the llama sketch.........not....once.....
To be fair, the guy who played Major Krenner played a great sniveling evil little man. And, it takes talent to act like you're interacting with an invisible person and not look ridiculous...I mean, it still looks ridiculous, but the guy who played Krenner did a reasonable job.
I unironically like some of the performances in this movie. Yes the dialogues are very cheesy at times and the story is "cold War sci-fi movie" #325, but the professor, Krenner and even Faust have a couple of interesting moments.
"He was invisible but I'm positive he was black" is possibly one of the greatest riffs ever.
Probably a reference to Susan Smith, who had recently drowned her own children and blamed a black man for it.
For years, in the Robot Roll Call when Crow says "That's one 'O'!", I thought he was saying "I'm Squanto!".
"BAT GUANO!"
@@HylianFox3that's what I thought I heard him say, but that couldn't have been it.
"He was invisible, but I'm positive he was black" LOL!!!
Of Mikes and Men.
the short's a real train wreck. on more than one level.
Oh sure, let’s turn a guy who we’ve held hostage and practically abused invisible without strapping him down first.
24:40 Charlie’s eyes healed up just fine, vision is 20/20, but he never took off his welding glasses again.
They were welded to his nose, I guess. The kid thought his dad was Stevie Wonder.
Am I a horrible person for enjoying Crow's terrified shrill screaming?
I giggle every time.
I have nothing against Bill, but Trace's screams and laughs really make Crow for me.
NaiTaiDai no; it's perfection.
No it's beautiful.
5:04 Some really nice puppet-work on the "herbivore becoming increasingly alarmed" bit, too.
I sure hope they didn't expect us to feel sorry for Joe Joe, TOO HELL with that accident lover!
"You know, that short had an interesting juxtaposition: on the one hand, it had lots of valuable safety information, and on the other hand, it made me want to kill myself" Lmao!
aint it the truth!
Fuckin Classic!
Literally every safety video ever.
'Lmao' reminds me of llama. Do any of you people have a llama fer the Drew'ster?
I love that they point out how depressing the short is.
"Now Clay, you and Auntie McFrank... you ...are you?"
"...Partners. Yes...we're..."
What a dark, morbidly depressing short!
@@TyWebb224hu? it's not even the religion aspect of it that was depressing? It was the fact that life is full of fatal accidents...
@@nunyabiz2889 not only fatal, quality of life ruining as well, which is even more depressing lol
"Lay off the wodka" is one of the best lines in a mst3k riffed movie ever.
I’ve watched that short fifty times, and all of a sudden, out of the clear blue nowhere, it is a laugh-a-second conniption fit. It has to be the funniest continuous moments of anything ever. I drooled. I’m a spastic mess. I’m spent.
Glad someone enjoyed it... that was so much of a downer.
Someone needs those Two Scoops of Raisins...
I ain't watching that short no more.
Obey the toaster!
Ah, the creepy reverend and the town of cripples, what a great advertisement for the U.P.Railroad XD
There's a certain flaw to the idea of robbing banks invisibly... Like the fact that people could still see the MONEY floating out by itself!
Wow. I think out of all the references I've seen on this show, Rick Wakeman's The Six Wives of Henry VIII album has to be one of the most obscure. And brilliant.
Their book of references is shockingly deep. Damn RUclips for disabling annotations; those MST3K vids where they noted and explained every reference possible were fascinating!
"Dustin off my top hat.. bustin outta jaaaaail.. " 😆😆😆
Crow's eyes pop out when they run off for movie sign at 5:55
"Honey i shrank the audience's interest" Too funny.
Crow's panicked llama screams made me cry tears of undiluted whimsy and joy.
Ranks up there for me with Crow's weeping letter the movie-makers in Castle of Fu Manchu about casting white people in non-white roles. I LOVE THAT BIT.
12:04
Short Narrator: And though she was quick, and sure and competent in everything she did,
Crow: She spit in the eggs.
Watching this in a restaurant, and hearing that I snorted so hard I blew mucous down my face. *embarrassing* Can I get a coupla more napkins please?
About Charlie in that railroad short; I almost had that happen to me, except the guy with the torch was just turning around to get his gas line unwrapped around his feet. He swept the flame right across my face. Fortunately, I had a burning shield on too.
Glad you did! That's scary!
Ian C Holy crap!!!!
Glad you're okay. Scary stuff!
The best safety rule seems to be "assume everyone else is an idiot", because it's shocking how often you end-up being right.
@@michaelccozens Sad, but true.
Wow... 'Mikey' is creepy! Way more menacing than 'Evil Mike' during the Star Trek parody. Also, "Stick that in your llama and smell it!" is going to be my new catchphrase.
I can tell you from personal experience that llamas smell pretty bad on their own 😁
Someone needs to send that to JohnnyB
Man that educational short was a real bummer!
Choir starts
Bible verse
Shot of church
"The most important lesson of all.......the fullness of life can only be tasted when our happiness is shared with others"
ah, so it's THAT kind of church
"Remember, if you die on the job you can't join us in our glorious transcendence when we all shuffle off this mortal coil to hitch a ride on a comet! Say, what flavor of Kool-aid do you prefer?"
...only carelessness causes accidents, so it is always the victims fault, not the company for not supplying enough safety equipment or doing necessary repairs or over working employees or failing to properly train them...
Well it was made by Union Pacific so it's in their best interest to direct blame away from them and towards the victim
Yep, and people are supposed to predict their own heart attacks. Also, companies would be totally cool with employees taking the day off whenever they are feeling a little unwell...
The "safety" systems Union-Pacific brags about here are laughably-pathetic. Dead-man switches on trains have been there since there were such things for really, really good reasons.
If your system doesn't have at least one fail-safe, you don't have a system; you have luck.
@@benrichardson5662 Unless Union-Pacific has an interest in justice or a workable society or just keeping their rail-road operating efficiently.
It's strange how "best interests" always seem to be defined in the short-term.
to be fair are the occasional chowderheads.....
20 dislikes = 20 people who wanted to give matches to Mikey.
Buncha accident lovers.
Whereas I gave the movie a thumbs up......and a couple gallons of gas to Mike. Umm....errr........oh look a lama!
22 blew up with joey and the major
But, hey, it's Squanto.
YOU FOLKS GIVE NO MATCHES TO MIKEY YOU HEAR ME?! YOU FOLKS GIVE NO MATCHES TO MIKEY?! I DONT CARE IF MIKEY GOES FLYING THROUGH A WINDSHIELD!!! 🤣
If the short is right and man's natural lifespan was 70 years, then George Price was already living on borrowed time. And his similarly aged friend Fred must have been in his fifties when his son was born.
That short riff was absolutely savage. I loved it.
Charlie really makes you realize there is no god.
My all time favorite moment has to be Mike's quip at 10:05. "That's really interesting." The delivery just nails it.
These guys of Mst3k are very talented and creative.Trust me I saw their riff trax of Sharknado 2 and I laughed from beginning to end.
The narrator of the short was Art Gilmore, who was also the narrator on all the episodes of “Highway Patrol.”
The llama sketch is my litmus test for new people to see if we share a sense of humor.
All the shattered, melted, broken and otherwise deranged looking crow puppets collected all together would make one creepy Five Nights at Freddies knockoff.
Take a drink every time you hear "gentle pressure"
Remember, it's Gentle pressure, not Genital pressure. Learned that the hard way.
It’s the difference between between being accidentally hit with a lit torch and deliberately hit with a lit torch.
Gentile Fraiser
@@Chunkboi That’s sexual harassment and I don’t have to take it
@@CartridgeMaster then get safety goggles...
"DON'T YOU GIVE NO MATCHES TO MIKEY!!!"
"Oppenheimer cupped Einstein's breasts..."
WHOA. Physicist yaoi.
apparently calling somebody average was considered a compliment in the 50's
I always thought Tom was a robot of culture and class. That all changed when I heard him pronounce it "Glen-fiddich" instead of "Glen-fiddick" at 1:11:00
After watching this short, I think, "Thank God I'm Catholic. This Railroadism stuff scares me."
Get off my land, you pious son of a !
Same, just replace Catholic with "Reformed Presbyterian"
This short was very informative, in alerting us to the fact that only Catholics are affected by railroad accidents.
Jon Dunmore And Catholic ministers have sinister telepathic powers they can use to cause auto accidents and make waitresses hallucinate. “Get out of my head, Reverend...”
what about us jewish railroaders?
14 people gave matches to Mikey.
7:46 "to become aware of the loveliness of all things living" .. like this homeless man digging through the trash in the background
Good eye! Ironic indeed
still...a person has gotta do what it takes to survive, no?
VERY funny! The riffs are hilarious, especially mid-movie. One of their best episodes, IMO.
That was actually a decent invisible man movie, but I still liked it getting riffed. The railroad short was hilarious. Great post thanks a bunch!
I am not hilari-fied by iT.
Remember - GENTLE PRESSURE.
There was a quite impressive display of breakfast cereals at the back of the 'Kissing Helen' cafe.
I love the Llama skit..it's hilariously disturbing. LOL
That Bed & Breakfast opening bit was every bit disturbing. I love this show!!!
Don't give Mikey any matches!!!
"I think a couple of Jumbo Slim Jim's will change your miiinnnnddd..."
"I often stop by here for a cup of coffee."
"THAT'S REALLY INTERESTING."
4:23 Mike looks like he walked off the set of Deliverance.
انتا راع
God, this short has to be the most depressing thing...ever.
A hot and windy August afternoon has the leaves in constant motion.
Can you imagine the awesome power of putting a Guinea pig in a room that no one can see ??? Just think of it a guinea pig in a room and no one can see it .
As a guinea pig owner, I can attest that it would be awesome :D
World-conquering!
Whenever we're shown just how gangly Crow really is it's truly a bit unsettling 😂
Reminds one of Alien
The short before the movie is one of the most unique things on the show. The short itself is so genuinely depressing which makes the quips and jokes so much funnier. Just when you feel so down that you want to put a gun in your mouth, Mike and the bots breathe some joy back into you. It's an odd piece of MST3K history where you almost feel like the mad scientists would win if not for Mike and the bots being who they are.
You people bring matches for Mikey?
+Kurt Smith You gonna be the worm face!
I know...not for a few seasons....but it reminded me of that so much for some reason....
"I'm having a crisis of faith, Reverend..." "Put your safety googles on, son."
The Amazing Transparent Man vs. The Amazing Colossal Man!!!
Two Amazing men enter, only one will leave!!!
The Pacific Railroad short is weirdly sorta well-written.
It is, but kinda in a bad way? A safety short should have you thinking about, y'know, safety, not the inevitability of death.
@@michaelccozens it keeps you on your toes thinking the grim reaper is always behind your shoulder
11:15 "So his name is JoJo?" haha
"Hey! Have a massive conorary on your own time!"
I love MST3k. Am I the only one who enjoyed Trace Beaulieu's psychotic, narcissitic Crow over Bill Corbett's relaxed, more energentic Crow?
JPerez9011 I had to love to grow OG Crow, but now I love both. Beaulieu's seems more laid back to me though?
people can enjoy all four crows (trace, bill, the new guy, and the guy from the live shows). people don't need to have a preference or a favorite.
I think people underestimate Trace's contribution to the writing of the show in general
Bill Crow is meaner than Trace Crow
Not sure what they were smoking for the that first host segment with the Llama. lol.
Hahaha, there are several clips of MST3K where I swear they were on something.
Yeah there are some. But the llama one just seemed like they were just off. lol.
Im actually more of a fan with Joel's host segments than Mike's.
Motherly nature of Joel and his talks of philosophy and teaching the bots I find to be more interesting. lol.
Silver MonstrosityInc Well, in that regard Joel was the creator of the bots, so he was, in a way, the parent, Mike was more of the fun uncle.
PeterBluth Exactly, Mike was more of a pal than Joel. So in that sense, Mike's host segments to me were nothing great. Despite thinking they had the best movies and quips in those seasons, I didn't like the season 8-10 from a host segments perspective. Pearl never really intrigued me like Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank did.
Wizard of Ass Ah, I think Bobo and Brain Guy make up for Pearl's shortcomings, but you are correct, Dr. F and TV's Frank are a superior set of mads. That all being said, its kinda funny, this llama bit is one of my favorite host segments in the series. I love it because I can watch it numerous times and find something different each time.
"I'm watching you feel good....."
This movie actually isn't that bad, cheesy sci-fi plot notwithstanding.
"What it do?"
"I thought you were up in the lab?"
*SLAP*
"I was."
Oh wow, that was Penn Jillette at the end saying "this has been a presentation from Comedy Central."
reading the credits dr forrester is the voice of Crooow?!? what?! that’s incredible!! and a lil hard to believe really. 🤷🏾♂️
A friend and I were discussing who was a better host, my friend said Joel because he felt the skits with Mike were more subdued. I then showed him this episode and the llama skit...let's just say he has a different outlook on Mike😂🤣😂🤣
"You folks bring matches for Mikey?"
I agree on so many levels, homie. I really did like the chemistry between Mike, Servo, and Trace's Crow. It lasted a few seasons, but it was a relatively short time. Not to take anything away from Bill's more mellow, sarcastic Crow, but I love Trace's demented personality for Crow.
He was different!
"It was Hell!" recalls former child.
I'm watching you feel good.
"Do you want to make more money?"
"Sure... we all do!"
"You can go to school for: TV/VCR Repair, Medical Transcription, Animal Care, Auto Mechanics..... or get your degree!"
(Just for you analogkid01.)
What was that thing I was supposed to remember? Gentile pray-sure?"
20 people gave Mikey a match. Sad.
This short is a disaster. 😆
Why do I get the feeling that the short film was produced by the railroad company? That whole bit about how awesome the company is about preventing accidents.
"So the leading causes of accidents are joy, sex and old age?" 🤔
20 gave Mikey matches, and now look at poor Charlie!
This is one of my favorite old B films. I break it out & watch it regularly.
Crow's eyes fell out at 05:58
That would be something to shriek about,lol.
SuperIllusiveman 5:58 LMFAO
i saw it too!!! they go crazy when it’s movie time!