And get rid of that terrrrrrible looking broccoli hair. I just want to take a razor blade to it
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- Опубликовано: 10 окт 2024
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Support your boy and buy a goddamn channel shirt here. 7 designs now available links below. Lets get the Devil movement going
TISH LOGO
shop-hellshead...
If you don't like Deicide you don't like Deathmetal
shop-hellshead...
Ive forgotten more metal than you know
shop-hellshead...
Make metal offensive again
shop-hellshead...
Real Men listen to Cannibal Corpse
shop-hellshead...
Vulgar Display To Posers
shop-hellshead...
Whats heavier than Pantera
shop-hellshead...
Totally with you on the little zoom zoom broccoli heads. They're all over my gym now, all obsessed with Sam and instragram, and most of them don't put their plates back. The ones that do, put them in ridiculous spots like sandwiching the the small ones in between the bigger ones, all disorganized. Some of them just leave the plates laying on the floor. The zoomer's parents must have never told them to put their toys away. They expect mommy to just clean up after them.
Zoomers will NEVER recover from this title
Fr 🧢
Nothings worse then being in the middle of a set and some broccoli head normie comes up to you and asks you about your band tee. We ain’t got nothing in common if you don’t know the Tish homeboy so keep walking
I'm so glad that anybody I have to interact with is a country-ass hick, or an Amish type thing, which is even more of a country-ass hick. I would do something naughty on a very large scale if I had to interact with these sorts of bozos on a daily basis.
I can't stand broccoli cut, makes me irrationaly pissed off
It makes me rationally pissed off
HellWitch Syzygial Miscreancy sends Attic's entire catalog home on a STREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETCHERRRRRRRRRR
Greatest album of all time in my opinion. The Dawg done broke my heart today lol!
Hell yeah brah brah
Attic is just mercyful fate Lite, I have no idea why the Dawg worships them so much
@@averagetexan9930Sounds like someone hasn't listened to Return of The Witchfinder...
You must be outta your fuckin gourd!
Sideshow Bob hair.
Sloth-Dawg love broccoli 🥦 🥦 🥦
WERE BACK !!!! one of the most underrated Jdawg statements. Along with brain dead sheep canoe. ... Hailz the Dawg, dudes been making me laugh and providing me with metal for YEARRRRRRRS \m/
We’re back a dinosaur story!
@Leave_The_Hall_69 it in the works 😆 🤣 😂 😹 that would be amazing. I'd rub it in the Dawgs face for sure.
@metalmusician6996 😆 🤣 Diniosors or land before time ???? The answer will deicide if we're cool from here forward 😎...
@@mikeviolate666 dawg my mom use to buy those land before time vhs tapes for me when I was a kid.
Were back!
Pestilence ''Testimony of the Ancients'' smokes most of the Dawg's favorite death metal bands.
"Spheres" is great too!I bet he hates it...😅
But that's your opinion
@@evilsil666 Spheres is not as good as Testimony of the Ancients imo. But it's still decent yeah.
why such an old title, there's boat loads of both new and old that smokes Dawg's regular rotation.
prophetic revelations 🔥
Devastation from TX is also killer.
That broccoli haircut is actually a style that belongs to hip hop and trap trends
Zoomer-'tard rap trends
Literally haven't seen one band member in a death metal or hardcore band with that haircut ever
@@TimmyTurner421 That shit is too canoe for metal
@@nikposada0824 well it literally makes it look like their head farted, that's not exactly very darkness and evil of them
17:03 yep yep yep Larry the Lobster sends em home on a streeetcher
The sponge should definitely be able to draw some material from this one 😆 🤣
🧽🐡🐚 UNPAIIIIIID QUESTION FOR THE CEO OF REEK OF DEATH RECORDS, SPONGE-PUPPER
🐋🐳🐚🌊
WHAT'S THE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A MEAT n POTATOES RIFF AND A CHUGGA-LUGGA-LUGGA?
🏖⚓️🛳🦑🦭
Mr. Benton, good to see ya.
Anyone actually know who’s behind Reek of Death?
Meat n taters riff good chugga lugga..has yo boy wigger connotation
@@cable9689 HHR IS DUHHHH
Clapped Hairline contest: Cronos from Venom or Dallas Toler-Wade from Nile?
Dev9n Townsend has got em both beat
"I've seen bigger muscles at Red Lobster" XD That's t-shirt worthy right there \m/
😂😂😂😂 AGREED!
I'd buy!
Fuck yeah!
Mussels*
No "we're back", no "comeback shit", only demo's, brah-brah!
Brocoli hair cut looks like real bad. Guy walks into a barber shop, cutter says im brand new and this is my 1st hair cut ever. Guy says meh do whatever... guy walks out with a Brocoli cut.
Mushroom cuts got you beat up when I was a kid, I don't get how it's suddenly cool now. There's no way any 20-something with that haircut has ever had consensual sex with a woman. If they have - SHOW me the woman who would fuck that 😂
Wondering if cauliflower hair is a step up or a step down from broccoli hair....fear I'm gonna be pondering this one for a looooong while......but it works for Sam Sulek! so why not me.....🤔
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481 rock it dude, u bet you could pull it off 😏
@@mikeviolate666 Thanks for the confidence boost bruh bruh
Remember Dave's broccoli hair phase? He was never "more Metal" then when he was rockin' his broccoli locks \m/🎵🎵
@@icankillbugs204she works at a whorehouse in Nevada
Good news - got my toilet fixed.
Bad news - I kinda miss that bucket.
Wrong. You don't miss the bucket, you miss the stench of it. Big difference brotown!
Daily before work canoe smashing
Broccoli hair is the least of your concerns.. have you seen that JoJo hairstyle trend down in Texas? That Dumb & Dumber haircut called the Edgar??? More than likely you'll see them on mugshots on the news around these parts. This look is horrrrennnndous. So horrendous that a barber refused to give that cut in his shop, and even put a censor-marked picture of an Edgar haircut on his socials. The guy got so much backlash that he got called a Nascar fan! Pffffft.. he was also the same ethnicity. Ridiculous.
Waiting for The Dawg to end up on one of those gym girl call out Tik Toks! 😸
I was not aware of the anti-Edgar barbers "down in Texas", such rogue dissidents will not be tolerated!!!!
On a serious note, yeah that's the worst cut currently going, it's especially bad if you have curly hair.
This is real? Mother fucker, I’m climbing under a rock
Edgars aka Headgars are usually shitty kids
Dude that Edgar haircut just looks like a bowl haircut.
Also there were dudes back around roughly 30 years ago around this time back in '94 that had a weird bowlcut back then, if I'm not mistaken some of the more dodgy wiggers had them back around that time but I can't remember for sure
My brother and his friends were hanging out with a dude like that, if I remember correctly he was White trasy dude that was no good.
Not liking Hellwitch because of the riffs is truly unsettling
Syzygial Miscreancy Rob's faveeee!
the new hyperdontia sends that eternal solstice record home on a STREEEEEEETCHER
Thanks for the heads up on the new Hyperdontia, it's overwhelming to keep track of all these fvckin' bands.
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481 mhm, sure is!
I identify as a devil \m/
\m/
😈
Does Death Metal Dave or is he "above" that?
@distributorovkvlt-points5481 that would be for him to deicide. Affirming that you are a devil is a deeply spiritual transgression into an awareness that you are one with the Dawg. And I wouldn't dare proclaim that kind of purity upon another, unless I knew for sure they were one with the cause. Such as you are my devil brother ( Distributor ov kvlt ptsd 5481 ) ... now don't mind me I'm gonna drink this yummy looking punch Jdawg sent me with my most recent HHR order. Later dude and have a good weekend ... 🍷x😋x = ☠️
@@mikeviolate666 LOL Killer post Mike, wild words for sure, not enough out-side-the-box thinkers in the Dawghouse.
Kinda early still to get blasted or isn't it?
Sulek doesnt even jave the broccoli-hair brahbrah
He just has long curly hair
Yo Sponge, why was Gaahl giving you a what looked like a bronco buster for 4 minutes outside of weenie hut jr last night, brah brah?
I didn’t see it, I walked IN ON IT!
A little precise with the J-Dawg fantasy there brah brah. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
@@solarempiresuomi8815 How long have Seinfeld re-runs been a thing in finlandia?
Do they keep it in English or is it fucked over with finnish over-dubbing?
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481 Did steelstorm666 get you to post such a dumb comment? Did he make you feel you needed to white knight him?
@distributorovkvlt-points5481 You guys just can't stand it when you're challenged.
Sad that steelstorm666 can't fight his own battles.
What’s heavier than Bon Jovi?
Nia Jax
3 Doors Down
Freddie Mercury’s mustache
Back in the day when I smoked weed, my device was named "Bong Jovi". I also had a bicycle named Bichael. The weed made these lame jokes seem funny.
enya
I was surprised when Pat Ranieri said he felt betrayed by Spiritual Healing. Those riffs feel right in line with his.
Enjoyed Dawgs Chick talk… wanna hear more of that. Wanna see Dawg rate different girls out of 10, telling us who’s mid or not.
Ohio / Michigan is a hidden sleeper for hot ass women and since both states are mid they have much better personalities then big city girls
@@PlutoTheGod even over the past 24 years with a massive shift in population?
@@PlutoTheGod Oh. Youre the other. Y'all think anything is "hot ass".
@@PlutoTheGod Ive heard this before
@@PlutoTheGod country girls only for me brahbrah. Blonde hair, blue eyes, modest clothing, no makeup or tattoos or piercings, stay home knitting on weekends instead of going out partying, don't talk to men, work jobs in education or maybe healthcare, don't even know what onlyfans is. Mmmhmm 👌🏻
I already love the album title. "Demonic Fertilizer!"
If you think about it. Demonic fertilizer sounds like a Christian based gardening fantasy. Because the Devil Worshipping title would be Angelic Fertilizer. It's like saying ' I hate them goddamn mutha fucking demons so much that I use them as fertilizer '. It's really good album title anyway, hilarious. I think Demonic Dentist is a great band name
Demonic Feritilzer is the actual name for human waste from eating McDonalds
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 What meds? Cause whatever it is, I want whatever he's taking.
@@SuicidalGrind I want drugs too!
Great news devils, I just got my _Justine_ _Horval_ eyebrow templates in from Hell's, I'm one step closer to mimicking the look of my idol!
You know what, Sponge? You'd look nice with broccoli hair. Sort of like if George Washington and one of the generic villains from the classic beat 'em up 64th street had a baby and it learned how to speak from listening to Patrick Mameli interviews. Gnome sane, hard R?
6:31 thx for the shout out dawgi 👌🏾
nice, he forgot Pestilence for a great death metal from the Netherlands.
@@lopolik he forgot many good stuff my friend, but that's what our dawg does xD
@@Leave_The_Hall_69not even 5 mins bruh bruh
The reason Sam Sulek "won't be coming to the gym 10 years from now" is because he'll be dead from the ill affects of steroids bruh bruh.
Saw a vid on his HIGHLY questionable diet (a half gallon of chocolate milk / fruity pebbles) too.
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 "mammoth daily intake of tubesteak" Come on Hall, you're ONLY the creator and CEO of Hall's HOMOverse, surely you can see the irony in your own question, right?😁
Honestly I thought Nick Walker would have long been dead by now. Matt Jansen is a dangerous ass coach even Chad Nichols said when he got ahold of Dallas he was mixing things and taking dosages so high they’d have no extra effect other than side effects.
Sam is a cool guy but I don’t get why you’d blast like he does if he doesn’t even care about competing. Maybe just age. I seriously considered it while younger and now I’m glad I didn’t.
@@PlutoTheGod Just dole-in' out a few factuals bruh bruh.
Sam's obviously being reckless with his health, not that I follow him or care.
You can glee these facts very quickly from just a handful of videos.
Idk
Some of those Deicide albums have a lot of wanky solos
Stench of Redemption specifically (but also the one they put out this year)
To each his own
I like wanky guitar solos😂
@@FitBeastNY666 ...right....but what does THAT have to do with sam broccoli hair sulek brah brah? looks like you tapped the wrong post. #NOT-a-deicide-fan
I can hear Robert Green dying @18:45.....as the Dawg proclaims "not a fan".😯😔😥
Don't worry brah, there's still the word of Death Metal Dave, which, of course, supersedes all.
I don’t know how I’m gonna recover from this 😢
@@robertg305 Cope bruh, cope.....then pull yourself up by the boot-straps and seek out the opinion of Death Metal Dave, cuz like I said, Dave's word supersedes all! \m/
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 What's this! YOU DON'T KNOW WHO DEATH METAL DAVE IS!!??!! Fuck me dead......
I always knew you were a poooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooser Hall, but this takes all! DAMN!
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481 Where do I find Death Metal Dave? Help me! Lol
@@robertg305 just search for "ghoulish dave" and you'll find him in no time bruh bruh.
Before this channel, I was only aware of Sindrome. They were a big thing in Chicago. Everyone knew of them by 89/90. INTO THE HALLS OF EXTERMINATION!!!@
Yo J-bawb, am I permitted to flex and take selfies in the gym mirror if I can overhead press not one, but two stuffed teddies on each side of the bar?
Broccoli hair. Its the future, sadly.
i'm betting it's more like zoomers bowl cut.
Works for Sulek, don't mean it works for average twig boy! Haha
Dude that cut is very laughable.
Twig boy hahaha, I use that term all the time. Did you yoink it from King of The Hill as well?
it should be called the queer cut
Only allowed during the month of June.
@@Poser_Metal_Records a Pride fade
Isn't a gripe an annoying thing?
Yeah I picked up on that too 😂
Yep lol
“Feel like I’m gettin a sex change over here” 😂😂
Your list is legit! 💀🤘
'Meat and 'Taters'!!
9:50 i always leave my phone in the car or at home. If the music they play at the gym is trash, its okay i listen to it. I notice most gyms play more "old people" music in the morning which is 80s and 90s stuff.
Hell no I can’t stand the music that gets played in my gym if I forget my phone or headphones it’s gonna be a bad gym day for me
I always go right before closing and crank the tuneskies on full blast.
Sad to break the news to Justin, but the all-female band called Crypta is way heavier and more popular than all the bands on HHR put together
😂🤡
Gotta step up your trolling brah brah. Just aint cuttin' it.
Nah, Kittie sends em all home on a streeeeeetcher.
On that note, the new Kittie album 🔥 dropped today!
The Bangels or Vixen are pretty fuckin brutal
Broccoli Hair…hilarious J-Dawg! You should do what they did in jackass the movie and sneak behind them and buzz their hair!!! “Hi I’m J-Dawg Welcome to Jackass!”
Dawg
Going to see bloodfeast album release party in jersey at dingbatz sat
Did you hear the vocals on that thing they were horrible
Someone should do a J-Dawg Weekly Recap. 10-15 minute videos with the best moments of each week
Like Boglim Chronicles eh
Morning brother!!! 💀 ☕ 👍
ALBUM BATTLE Attomica disturbing the noise vs infernal majesty none shall defy
easy, infernal majesty
I used to play shows with Infernal Majesty's singer, yepyepyep, that's bugsy's claim to fame
Revealing moment @19:37
What is it that you prefer? The big _what?_
''The Big Willie'' AKA Will Rahmer??
@@lopolik The Dawg said it (and he meant it god damn it).🍆
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 Dawg loves ''Harder, Faster'' from W.A.S.P.
@@lopolik and "another piece of metal" from the Scorpions
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 Huh....well Hallsy with a title like that, "Harder Better Faster Stronger" must be the official theme song for Halls Homoverse or could you not secure the rights? Perhaps you need to _polish_ _up_ your poofster businessman acumen.
Yo sponge, is Tom G Warrior considered a KVLT tough guy brah brah?
Tom G Warrior and Mille Petrozza,
In the 80s they represented toughness
A pair of original metal fanaticals
But now they're a bunch of numbnuts
A cult Skullet
@@Poser_Metal_RecordsI think you mean that they are above a certain IQ and grew up while the rest of metal is stuck in arrested development with the mentality of middle schooler clicks.
The first 3 releases from eternal solstice are goated
Hey dawg, in Finland we have a different meat in the balls so we kinda like that slow stuff.
21 min video, gym question at 10 min ... 1/2 the vid is gonna be gym talk 😆 🤣 😂 😹 \m/
mmmhmm, just the way we like it!
Hey J-Dawg, since Sam Sulek left Hosstile.. are you going to sign him and make him the first HHR athlete?
😂 like and share the video Devils
I bet Dawg's been making fun of other people's hair since the time he himself had a full hairline. There's a lesson in there for anyone who likes having a full head of hair.
Anyone listen to Imperator from Poland? Some good songs; classic style hard to pin down. Apparently was one of Dead from Mayhem's favorite bands. I listen to that every once in a while but I can't think of the best songs. Persecutor is one.
yes
try the bands on oldschool metal maniac's reissue label. he has put out a lot of polish classic stuff most people dont know.
I was lucky to get their Unholy Bible of Polish Death Metal comp CD for a decent price last year. Killer stuff 🤘
The quad extension is always taken at my gym. I blame Sam Sulek. A video he did said it was his bread and butter for quads. Now all the broccoli head zoomers are obsessed with it. It's actually broken right now because of them. There is another one in the yellow room thankfully that some of them don't know about. But the old black Icarian one was the best.
J-Dawg obviously doesn't like anything technical or doomy and only pretends to like Immolation and Incantation so he can be one of the cool kids. What a canoe!
Troll
Make a video calling him out brah brah.
Download complete, jamming track 1 _"Inserts"_
Note: opening riff likely NOT Death Metal Dave approved / great production, especially the drums / numerous well performed solos abound
30 seconds in there's something of a chorus, key-word is: "DE-FE-CA-TION!!" / vocal approach very "caveman" styled / most riffs are good
Distributor largely agrees with Dawg's review, forwarding to Death Metal Dave now / Status: Currently awaiting Official _DMD_ Certification👍🏻
Damn mate, i was like "nah i won't check this shiet out" but your review makes it pretty tasty, i'm impressed in all seriousness, you really should make your own company and work as a salesman, success is guaranteed bruh bruh 👌🏾💵💴💶💷💳💸💰
@@sinisterking6009 I'm going forward a link to the one and only Death Metal Dave, just maybe he'll chime in the comments and give it a thumbs-up. I'll tell him that I'm trying to elevate him to at least to the level of "Demigod" in the Dawghouse. bruh bruh.
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481 with the power of da Kavault keeper it should be a easy game, Hailz \ m /
@@sinisterking6009 Obscure cinema recommendation. "Murder By Phone" (1982)
Pros: Does not star Jason Statham
Cons: hard to find, unless you download it, no woke BS
@@distributorovkvlt-points5481ahh 1982, this is a comforting release year 🤤 putting that in my watchlist, is it a good thrill or what's the reason recommending this one in particular?
Robert Greene, PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAID QUESTION. 😂
After that response, this little paypiggy is gonna go Bree Bree Bree all the way to the sad house lol
@@robertg305 I mean the Hellwitch is a little bit in that Atheist, Opeth, Edge of Sanity tech prog death metal territory so I'm not surprised he didn't really like it.
I love Edge Of Sanity lol!
@@Leave_The_Hall_69 Great question Hall, no really, I wish I'd thought of that one annnnnd paid 10 dollars to ask it.
@@robertg305 they're great!
Dawg isn't a huge fan of Syzygial Miscreancy? My heart is broken! Lol
What?! J-Dawg not liking HellWitch's best album is UUUUUUUUUUUUUNACCEPTABLE!!
@@SuicidalGrind Agreed! We can't let him get away with this!
@Leave_The_Hall_69 😢
J-Dawg thinks you are gayyer than Chuck Schuldiner, brah brah.
Always J-Dawg never Gen Z Dawg. 😂😂🤣🤙😎
Hells Unholy Fire vinyl are starting to become a little uncommon!
Thanks for the heads up dude. Time to buy a bunch and put em on discogs for 80 bucks 😆 🤣
@@mikeviolate666 Cheapest one I could see right now is $34 but it's international shipping which can be a major hassle sometimes. After that it quickly gets into the $40 plus range and none affordable with US shipping. Might actually not be a totally bad time to reissue it here soon
@@mikeviolate666 God dammit
@@SuicidalGrind 😆 🤣 what a :> 😆 🤣
Robert green Paiiiiiiiid question 🤘🏿😁
My jam of the day armored angel wings of death demo. Share yours
The new Crypt Sermon 👌🏻
Do you find it to have _kvlt-appeal_ or is it deceptively packaged _poser-core_ nonsense?
JizMark demo by Foul Stench from Dayton, OH (funny Death Metal), and Monster by R.E.M (best American band)
Mike Violate Sings Broadway Show Tunes In Greek
I've had 5 hours worth of Texan Thrash today, but if I had to pick one probably Devastation - Signs of Life
.
eternal solstice is boring run of the mill death metal unexciting riffs there artwork and band logo look like in the realm of angel corpse and diabolic but not even close a drummer who couldnt keep up with lombardo, lame death metal riffs i could barely get through a full listen,i would never recommend this,why would you listen to this when you have ALTAR YOUTH AGAINST CHRIST
🎥 FILM BATTLE: The Amityville Horror (1979) Vs. Poltergeist (1982)
Poltergeist every day of the week and a hundred and sixty six times on Sunday. Love that flick. Movie absolutely fraked me as a kid. Personally, i prefer the remake Amityville with the idot from dead pool. But the 79 one is good ...\m/
Poltergeist, of course.
The Amityville series is weak sauce, definitely Poltergeist.
Poltergeist
Amityville Horror, but Poltergeist is awesome too.
HEX rulez , best Nun release for my ear holes to digest \m/
Goat is the only one you need .. is there new guitarist that bald dude tried to break up the fight I was in with a bouncer when I went to go see them so yeah I can't stand their new stuff... And no I didn't get to see them or possessed but paid for the tickets
@650AFTERHOURSOC lame about the show. Yeah I do not care for red is the color.
@@650AFTERHOURSOC Dude you're gonna milk this story for as long as I've been milking the "calling Paul from Blood Incantation a poser to his face" story eh
J-Dawg ... It's a different time.
a STUPID time
Over 8 minutes of lame ass boring gym stuff...😒😴 anyway...dutch band Ceremony is awesome 🤘
🕎✡️🛐 Jew-Dawg back with another video scamming for cash
What are you talkin' bout, 50 dollars for a brief, half-assed, review is a fvckin' fantastic deal!
I got that CD I got that on CD that’s a good CD
Frasers cd collection makes others look weak. Hailz the king \m/
Got the CD, have ya?
I got that CD I got that on vinyl that's a good cassette
Fraser is about to have a Ka’ai cd. Because he’s awesome. Mike Violate got one. Because he’s tough
sup devil
\m/
sup devil
Eternal Solstice rules, I own all of their CDs & a couple of vinyls.
👍
Say the same for the doo doo braids or your soft like a sponge 🧽
💿 ALBUM BATTLE: Immolation - Acts of God (2022) Vs. Incantation - Unholy Deification (2023)
Incantation
Luke 5:32 - I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance. Luke 13:3 - I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.
Go take your meds.
PUT DOWN THE BIBLE AND PICK UP SOME IRON BRAH BRAH 💪
I can quote fictional books and movies too.
It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose.
Not that hard
@@KaaiHawaiianDeathMetal It's funny because the people who quote things like that act so smug about it. Almost like they think they're being wise or clever.
@@Poser_Metal_Records I run in to people shouting bible quotes once in a while. Not necessarily at me. Every once in a a while. I throw out some stupid quote like I did on here
deceased isn not under rated they suck shit, you over rate exhumed they have 0 stage presence and after first 3 they are mediocre at best, gorgasm is under rated and should be as big as fetus
Why you hatin' brah brah?
felt like i was having a seizure when i read that
With an assessment like I'd say you've been vickin' your own lagina way way too fucking much bruh bruh.
Perhaps try again at a later point, penance is still possible, but it's a long loooooong-shot after such blasphemy as this.
You're lucky you didn't say this shit to Death Metal Dave, he'd full-on blood eagle your ass for the noise rolling off your heretic tongue.
I bet you're real fun at parties.
Stage presence. Ahahaahaha
J-Dawg the gym early in the morning is much better than afternoon when all the canoes show up. This jobsite I’ve been at starts a little later so I’ve been going early before work! I’ll still go during canoe hour if I have to but people in the morning mean business and don’t dick around.