"If you are afraid of leaving a relationship.." - Matthew Hussey
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- Опубликовано: 19 окт 2024
- "If you are afraid of leaving a relationship.." - Matthew Hussey #shorts
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I’m a man. I felt pain leaving. But the freedom followed. And I can live free and in pain. I can’t live trapped and in pain.
Im with you bro
What made you feel trapped, if you don’t mind me asking?
Absolutely 💯
10/10
@@susananavarrete2801 I'm guessing all the trapping...
The pain that you feel when you leave is temporary, the pain that you feel if you stay is permanent. That's all you got to know!
Yes
AliSand Maybe your children would be better off with their father
Yeeessss 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
@@Sonic_sorceress
8&:;(
Can you define it clearly??
I didn't understood..
What hurts the most is that people know they hurting you but don't stop! 😢
So very true
You have to power to make it stop by leaving. You can do it. YOU are more powerful than the pain. Sending you love ❤
They do not care they do not love
OMG, THIS. But one thing for sure is that if someone keeps hurting me, I'd leave because I'm accountable for my own happiness. Even if it takes me a while to make up my mind. I shouldn't rely on another human to make me happy. That doesn't exist. But a great relationship can make you feel content.
yet so true
"Let your heart break, so your spirit doesn't."
-Andrea Gibson
Omg!
"THIS pain is a PERIOD not a question mark"
Just activated my soul.
The same for me. I'm afraid but I love him so much.
Yes Matthew!!!! I took the decision to leave. It took every single ounce of courage in me. I truly loved this man but I realised that I did not want to stay with someone who didn't edify me or have my back. I just didn't feel that he loved me any more. I know that I've made the right decision ❤
Girls......
power to you
This is the pain that I'm going through right now. Painful to let go but I'm not likely to achieve anything I want with this person. He's a big mass
Deep. Love the way he said that. Sometimes you have to hear it in a different way to fully comprehend what your decision needs to be.
So true. I left, I healed, and I am now ready for the new possibilities. Thank you for putting it so nicely.
I’m living this. It’s excruciating. It’s changed me so much and everyone has noticed. I pray for strength everyday.
Same....it hurts.
@@Linksta22 I’m sorry. Sending strength
@@robinlipert1477 I've found some solace in reading the bible and working out alone. Mentally I feel damaged, and I noticed something physically changed in me over the last few years of living like this. I can't put my finger on it, but it seems like some sort of hardening of my heart(physically) and deadening of my feelings. I feel like I now know why men leave their family and go off and live solitary lives in the woods.
@@Linksta22why
@@user-mi4yc7pr3x because when you have kids with someone, especially little kids, you don't want them to be fucked up in life because of selfishness on your part. So you suck it up, and deal with it and try and put all you positive energy into those kids. Your kids are your future. Once they are adults then I think you can say you did your part in giving them a wholesome childhood, even if it was at your personal expense. Once they are grown up and they can understand you aren't happy but sucked it up for them then you can explain to them how you need to leave to get better for yourself. I think they will appreciate it more that you stuck around and sacrificed for them, and they will love you more for it and understand your position, and be okay with it. Rather than leaving and wrecking their lives as well. Broken relationships affect little kids for life in hugely negative ways, but an adult child can see reason and understand your side with compassion and love for you.
I stayed.....and I only became colder!
Truth.💯💯
I kept telling this person to stop hurting me while I stay in the friendship but they never realised how much I suffered through. Instead they kept saying "you can never leave me cuz you're gonna be in real bad pain if you leave me. You'll adjust your needs and stay with me cuz you cannot leave, never" and they kept taking advantage of my kindness. You see, there's a threshold to anything and everything. There came a day when they did hurt me really really bad and the worst thing was they knew I was going thru a personally tough phase back then. Still they hurt me like that cuz according to them, that's the only way they can survive their situations and circumstances. It shattered the core values of friendship we both had built through the years and that's when I realised that they're never gonna stop hurting me.. But only using me emotionally. It was extremely painful while I stayed for about 7+ years and eventually realised it's not worth to stay as the suffering only increased year after year, as they're in delusional mode. It was pointless to expect loyalty from such ppl is what I learnt.
I'm so glad you removed yourself from such toxicity. I wish you the best. You deserve peace and happiness.
Happy for you leaving that relationship.... Take care dear!
@@donnamariedavidson5065 thanks a lot :)))
@@vanamalaswathi5331 thank you:))
Aww... 🛐🌈 Worst part of relationships is when you give your all 110% then U wonder why U put in the positive and their low vibes just mess up your balance and leave you questioning yourself. Best to keep the energysuckers away.
No amount of kindness and time and years invested... They won't change. Their vibration and way of thinking is twisted.
You deserved better than what their friendship have you 🫂
When they devalue you is even worse when U try to leave they blameshift.
All the best x.
Start by communicating! I hate it when everyone just says leave
I'm 100% with you. But what do you do when its 5 years in and she just won't change her behavior. Even as I say I'm leaving she's doing the same thins I ask her not to do. I have 2 children with this woman and I so wanted to NOT have a broken home but I can't take this anymore. Tonight I broke down in tears and left house. I'm a man that never cries, when I cry it tells me I've done all I can and it's time to go.
I didn't want to repeat the cycle of my parents but my God I'm so unhappy. The children is what keeps me around but that's not a relationship at this point. My daughter 2 and son 1, I've tried and failed. I can't stay in this hell hole anymore.
I choose me. It'll hurt for a lil bit . But not forever .💗
When you feel trapped....you can't see..it is fear....your affirmations sound hysterical..love...positivity..it sound like you need this for balance of your fear
Thank you bro , it took years but I finally escaped the torturing toxic relationship 🙌🏾 yes it’s still painful but at least now I know I can heal and move on. Thank you Lord 🙏🏾
He's so down to earth, real and straight forward. I know someone who is so happy after leaving a 25 year marriage. Seldom do we do for ourselves but when is it time for self happiness.
Follow him...he speaks what some are afraid to say. God Bless
I had no choice but to leave for good and to never turn back. I was in a 4 year relationship and at the end of the relationship I got asked if I wanted to be in a open relationship. That's humiliating.
feel that!!! 🦋🙏💜!! you're in control of your own destiny!!
Staying is pain.
I keep on saying I am happier without the person but I am lonely and I don’t see things improving .. I feel it getting harder
I feel lonely too... Really really lonely. Hits me first thing in the morning and last thing before I go to sleep... Worst timings. Struggling to cope and praying to God to help me.
It is rough but lean into solitude as PEACEFUL VS the chaotic, soul poison ☠️ of the person you left. Find social clubs, churches with single groups etc
Just keep going, that’s all what is needed. Keep doing some simple things, if you want to cry then cry, don’t stop yourself. Just keep going and one day when you wake up you’ll hear the peaceful silence inside. Everything’s gonna be okay.
It is hard to let go of the wickedness in this world, especially once you become part of the chaos. The mind will adapt to it's new environment. Whichever we choose, weather a relationship or to be in a single lifestyle. It just needs time to process the new infomation or life style we choose to be in. It feels chaotic at first, because of all the changes going around us, but eventually it will adapt. You will know the moment you start sensing peace around you. You will even start taking notice of the little things in life. Yahweh is the key to life.
That's trauma ya'll feeling, also fear. But jus know how brave ya'll are to go into the unknown. You're survivors. Meditation helps with healing.
I need to hear this everyday! ❤🙏🙏🙏
I left a short term narcissist ( 9 months) and I felt Happy and relieved!!
Staying is only mostly because of the habit of staying , don't know how to do different , it's the uncertainty of not having the same even if it hurts , always thinking of the absolute best out of it 🙃
You are right Ellen. It was the good thing to leave. Also with children
This video helped me to cry for the first time since we parted ways. I needed that.
Sincerely,
Man
I needed to hear this today. I left my abusive ex husband of 20 years and I also met someone after that who made me feel I was not good enough. Choosing to leave comes with pain, loneliness, doubt etc but I still choose my peace of mind over any pain I have experienced
So much truth, Mr. Hussey
So true. Very important point to take into consideration if you are scared to take the leap that is needed to make a change
I needed this clip very badly. Thank you to whoever for posting it and to the tech gods who blessed my feed with it.
MATTHEW HUSSEY IS WISE BEYOND HIS YEARS. GOD BLESS THIS MAN 🙌 🙌
Yes 100%. Prioritize your happiness, and not in a selfish egotistical narcissistic way, but in a pure self-loving, peace-inducing kind of way. ❤
I felt so much pain in my relationship with a narcissist that when I left him I felt relieved and so much peace.
I love this man... he makes me feel loved, calm and understood❤
I agree 💯
Needed to hear this, just had bad ending from 17 yr relationship... I keep staying out of feeling sorry, but past 3 days shows me that peace is way more cope able with pain then pain and misery and spiritually drained. Stay up my guys
Beautiful way of looking at pain. This kind of pain had purpose!!!
It’s so hard to leave,and I still don’t have the courage to do so😢
Leave it will get worse
You're only getting older. Really think about that. You can't reverse time. You can't reverse aging.
@@khrisi9410 I’m trying tho
@@IrishL29 set a long-term goal, 2 yrs or 3 yrs from today I'm out. Start quietly transitioning but BE SAFE, tell no one. Safety is the most important part of the transitioning process. Get a therapist and start healing.
Have you considered counseling? Right…because that would mean you have a problem. No…actually it means that there is a problem. You have come to acknowledgment that something wrong is happening. Everyone walks out, blames the other. Then they go and do it again, over and over again. Like a bloody merry-go-round of pain. I will ask this one question, if you say yes. Seek help instead of giving up. Does this other person show traits of someone in your past that has caused you abandonment/abuse issues? 🤔 Think about it for a little. Do you remind him of someone like that? Ok….right….now make the call and get the help from a licensed non spiritual psychiatrist.
this gives me goosbumps. just went through this. he is so damn right.
I have walked away. There is growth in my life. I need it. It is refreshing.
Leaving... Mental peace.
Very true and painful thank you for this strong and direct message.
Yes! Choose your pain! Leaving my abusive ex shoulda happened a lot sooner. Just glad I left him and living a peaceful life!
If you stay, things will only get worse.
So true 👍🏾 so accurate
Protect this man at all costs!!!!
YES, YES, YES! I WAS SET FREE BY THE KNOWLEDGE THAT IS BETTER IN PAIN ALONE AS A PROCESS WITH THE HOPE OF HEALING ONE DAY, THAN RATHER IN PAIN AND FEELING ALONE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH SOMEONE TOXIC AND ABUSIVE!!
Word Of the Day 💯
This is so true. This is what I did. And I did the right thing to leave.
Needed to see this. Thank you 😢
Well said!
You leave now and your pain will end in no time.
If you stay you are doom!
Matthew, you make so much sense! Thank you! 😊
This is one of your podcast that I truly agree. How I wish I’ve heard this before. Too late but I still make it and although I decided now to be alone and waiting for my time to come- I’m a happier and better person than when I’m with him
This is exactly why I always remind my self to live with no regrets! Full of peace and happiness. It's horrible when I hear people that are 60 or 70 saying " I should of left" "I wasted all my life"
I felt that 💯 On Point!!! 💕
He is so right. Been there and for me leaving was the right choice. We remained friends throughout and he always stayed close with the children. Communication is key to success . He was a good dad. 😊
Wow! That’s powerful! Deep!!! 🙌
Wow his words are so helpful and just hit home
💯👌absolutely but the fear and pain of leaving is very real when violence is involved
This was a very eye opening way to see this situation
Yep - when I left all of sudden great things happened in my life. I wish him the best but I am choosing to live a healthy life style and cultivate fruitful relationships ❤.
💯 never easy hang in there.
True Matthew. Having borne the pain of past rship,one shd be open to new possibilities. Nothing venture nothing gain.
I needed to hear this today
Needed to hear this today ❤
Always leaving is your advice...come one sometimes ppl can figure their problems out and get even better together...if they see their faults...like i do ...my ex except to much and let me become the problem the reason for him feeling bad ...instead of giving me the chance to change...
My problem with this is that a lot of people are very bad at assessing this sort of stuff. Sure...a lot of people should leave. But a lot of others can have unrealistic needs and standards that shouldn't be met by anyone. How can you objectively make this analysis without engaging in delusion?
@@NinjaLoli i didn't get him back ...he left me for good😭
@@miriammoellmann9266
So he was miserable. Why would you want him back. He wasn't happy.
Hi
Trauma bonding is real but like you said the pain will be there either way. Staying is much worse 😢
"-SOMETHING DIFFERENT."
😮👍
I like the black and white and she's so pretty, I need this encouragement in it right now thank you 💖
When I walked away, it was as if a large bolder was lifted from me. I had not expected that and even felt guilty about it for about a year. But the contentness I felt inside I never felt better.
it's so true...!!
Thank you . I needed that
💯 true words
I agree. I am feeling pain once I left and it is insufferable. So I would rather be being together and feeling the same pain than being alone in the pain.
Matthew is right !
This actually helped me make up my mind.
Thank you Matthew, i felt it, allready left this situation. If i didnt have left i wont had a life like i have now. There is a lot to heal from, and it needs time to recover; but its good to hear that i make the right decision
I absorbed love this guy! When he speaks I listen 😢
Thank you❤️
Couldn't agree more 🙌 Amen to that
wise words
Thank you.
he's 100% correct!!!!!!! I've lived it...Full of regret!!!!
My mother found the strength to leave my father after 34 years of marriage. He was a very abusive, awful human.She went on to spend the rest of her many years of retirement loving her life .❤
If you stay, you know what you will be in a life long. If you leave, you give yourself the chance to find a better situation.
Just left a 3 years toxic relationship and I am 39 but I hope I still have time to be happy and find the right person for me. I have all the question mark in my mind but still better than be together with a horrible person.
Right on!!👍👍👍
That is so true!
I felt this! Especially when the man I love keeps going back to old cheating ways
This pain is a period not a question mark. I love this.
true and well said..
Brilliant!
Needed this
This guy just spitting facts.
The pain you know may be better than the unknown sometimes. 😢
The realization that your choices are stay & be miserable or go & be miserable and lonely the rest of your life. No one talks about being older & not meeting anyone else.
Oh man! IDK if to like you or dislike you 'cause you speak so much truth n it hurts 😂
That's correct Matthew
I love this soo much
Good point
Well Put 👍
I need to move on and if im afraid it will never happen ,i cant wait for my new start thanks brov ❤