How To Be A Good Parent To Young Adults

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  • Опубликовано: 30 июл 2024
  • Are you a parent of kids who are transitioning to young adults? It's a tough phase, isn't it? I'm sharing with you what Vicki and I have learned through raising children of our own.
    Find out more about Positive Parenting here:
    parentingpowerup.com/
    Watch and Enjoy!
    Dr. Paul Jenkins
    For a FREE digital copy of my mini-book, Portable Positivity, visit this link:
    bit.ly/2PoIDam
    LINKS & RESOURCES:
    ========================
    Website: www.drpauljenkins.com/
    Books & CD’s: drpauljenkins.com/products/
    The Parenting Power-up Audio Course: parentingpowerup.com/
    Free digital copy of Portable Positivity: bit.ly/2PoIDam
    MUSIC
    ========================
    Track: Kisma - We Are [NCS Release]
    Music provided by NoCopyrightSounds.
    Watch: • Kisma - We Are | House...
    Licensed under Creative Commons - Attribution 3.0
    ========================
    Video by Nate Woodbury
    BeTheHeroStudios.com
    / natewoodburyhero
    #LiveOnPurpose
    #PositiveParenting

Комментарии • 224

  • @anonymousprimate
    @anonymousprimate 2 года назад +29

    As a young adult, the unsolicited advice from my mom really gets on my nerves. Especially since she always puts the blame on me when often it’s about things that are either out of my control, or situations that she hasn’t experienced before but thinks she knows everything about. If any parent out there wants a young adults perspective: we aren’t dumb, sometimes we’re going to make mistakes and sometimes life is just gonna keep throwing curveballs at us, but most of us really just want your support and understanding. If we mess up somewhere, we often already know and hearing it thrown at us again can be really frustrating. Parents act like they’re perfect all the time or something I swear. Sometimes advice is great, but when it comes in an accusatory way we’re probably just gonna dismiss it. Idk if anyone cares but there you go

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +5

      Girl Next Door, very well said, I hope everyone reads this.

    • @virtuoussoulhealer3644
      @virtuoussoulhealer3644 Год назад +2

      I am guilty. My children doesn't even initiate contact with me..

    • @mariemartinez5892
      @mariemartinez5892 Год назад +3

      Thank you for sharing and I will definitely try not to come across that way to my young adult children.

    • @tiffanyfreeman6072
      @tiffanyfreeman6072 Год назад +1

      Well received as a parent.

    • @renee560
      @renee560 Год назад +1

      Thank you for your honesty. I get it.

  • @andreacarlington7158
    @andreacarlington7158 3 года назад +4

    So so good your videos ! Gives us hope and practical advice!

  • @SADKHAN95953
    @SADKHAN95953 4 года назад +12

    Every time I watch dr Paul's videos, a smile comes on my face, thank you dr Paul. Love form Pakistan

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад

      Mama Khan, Thank you so much. I love how we can connect through RUclips.

  • @ATunson
    @ATunson Год назад +8

    OMG I needed this parenting advice SO BAD!! My son is 26 returning back to college after so huge life events; one recently being the passing of his father. He is tough but human and has endured alot thus far in life. He is strong willed and stubborn; but has lots of potential...I just need to get out of his way no matter how anxious his choices make me. Thanks again !🙏🏽

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад +1

      Ashanti As Me, your son sounds wonderful. Glad you have each other during this time. He will do wonderful things.

    • @ATunson
      @ATunson Год назад

      Thanks so much for your kind words! 🙏🏽

  • @no5470
    @no5470 2 года назад +2

    I saw this and you made such a huge /life changing turn for me.
    Thank you a million times

  • @jennydeleon24
    @jennydeleon24 4 года назад +5

    Needed to hear this - THANK YOU

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад

      You are welcome, Jenny De Leon! Thanks for watching Live On Purpose TV.

  • @Tanya-eq3fy
    @Tanya-eq3fy 2 года назад +1

    Always VALUABLE and AMAZING info. Thank you.

  • @zulemaflores8796
    @zulemaflores8796 2 года назад +4

    Thank you for reminding us the role of a parent.

  • @zaleacampbell996
    @zaleacampbell996 3 месяца назад

    Thanks for the advice

  • @lovelana3595
    @lovelana3595 4 года назад +4

    This is helpful, thank you.👍

  • @DeterminedVeteran
    @DeterminedVeteran 4 года назад +10

    I recently was able to reconnect with my son as an adult .... these are really good tips thx for the positive message

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +1

      Determined Veteran, I am happy for you. I hope your relationship continues and grows.

    • @LisaMaryification
      @LisaMaryification 2 года назад

      Your son is very fortunate that you are seeking out ways to communicate with him more healthily. I wish my own parents had the self,-awareness to do that. I had to cut ties with them because when I grew through as a result of good therapy they stayed stagnant and didn't accept any responsibility for our toxic family dynamic. Instead, they blamed me and called me 'crazy' because the therapy with my psychiatrist was 'proof' to them of that. Frankly, I think they were afraid because I was spilling the beans on the abuse they exacted upon me in childhood.

  • @summerhamilton7064
    @summerhamilton7064 4 года назад +1

    Good video. Thank you for your advice.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад

      Glad it was helpful! Thank you for watching, Summer Hamilton.

  • @user-vv8rq3ij3o
    @user-vv8rq3ij3o 10 месяцев назад +2

    Just came across this. Fantastic advice. Not easy being a parent. We are all going through it. Train crash sometimes. All great advice. Many thanks. All so very true. X

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  10 месяцев назад

      Thank you. Honored to be on your team.

  • @lea0laco762
    @lea0laco762 3 года назад +2

    Thanks for enlightening myself as a mother of my only child who is 19 year old and live out to study in University in Mainland ..

  • @VP-fr3cj
    @VP-fr3cj 4 года назад +38

    Whew! This was hilarious 😂 and so needed by this helicopter single mom of now adult young men. Thank you . Lord help me!

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +3

      V P, just remember to love him, no matter what and even if... And, keep a sense of humor, you will need it.

    • @VP-fr3cj
      @VP-fr3cj 4 года назад

      Live On Purpose TV thank you!

    • @livmorganfan8528
      @livmorganfan8528 3 года назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV Im 26 years old,but i act like a middle aged adult,is it ok?

    • @onwardsandupwards7397
      @onwardsandupwards7397 3 года назад

      @@livmorganfan8528 Yes. Sometimes that is appropriate!

    • @t60334
      @t60334 3 года назад +1

      Oh, trust me. I thought I had it knocked out of the park. Looks like I am bunting or striking out!

  • @rosie01ism
    @rosie01ism 5 лет назад +6

    👋 I agree with your saying, love them no matter what, and even if. So true. I used to say, ok it’s time for a discussion . We’d sit down and discuss, what my problem, then they had their say. I found that worked, than yelling

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  5 лет назад +2

      Yes, counsel together, both parties listening and life can be a lot quieter, rose fragale.

    • @livmorganfan8528
      @livmorganfan8528 5 лет назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV Im 25,am i still a young adult?

  • @richmzdbaang770
    @richmzdbaang770 2 года назад +6

    I appreciate what you are saying but it's hard when you guide your young adult children to water and they gravitate to eating mud. At some point I had to step back and let them to figure it out on their own. I love my kids and I love me too. To work everyday, paying bills and day to day living; making sure I am always available to my adult kids was exhausting. Every family is different. I pray my children find their way and succeed in what ever it is that makes them happy.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад

      RuchMzD Baang, beautifully said. Many young adults do need to figure it out on their own.

    • @no5470
      @no5470 2 года назад

      I totally hear you!!! God help us all.
      Thank goodness alcohol can be bought through drive thru’s now!!!! Lol

  • @EdgarJrUy
    @EdgarJrUy 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for this sir ❤🙂

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад

      So nice of you, Edgar Jr. Uy, honored to be on your team.

  • @abolanleodejinmi4826
    @abolanleodejinmi4826 4 месяца назад +1

    Thanks so much. This video is so educative and helpful to me as a mother. God bless you

  • @Bidenlost2020
    @Bidenlost2020 7 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you, I'm a young adult myself in the nest. I feel that in this world, the 18-23 range is made too ambiguous. Right at 19, I got a job, and still hold that at 20. That time is very imperative to start good habits (devotion, budget, ect.). If mommy and daddy coddle you forever, ouch! If you're thrown out at legal age, ouch.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  7 месяцев назад +2

      It is never too early to start good habits. Good for you.

  • @LisaMaryification
    @LisaMaryification 2 года назад +3

    Wow, there really is a video on everything on youtube!
    I am trying to improve on communicating with my daughters who are both in their 20s and still live with me, mostly because of the pandemic and also to support me since I was diagnosed with late stage cancer.
    I love them both very much but have a tendency to compare my past troubles in my own 20s to their present ones. I see it as advice but thet both see it as me just complaining and belittling their feelings and problems. I need to learn to listen in order to validate their feelings better and, thus, guide them through difficult times. I suggested therapy because that's where they can truly share their feelings about everything, including me. And I respect that.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +1

      That sounds like a great idea. Try not sharing unless they ask you, that could help.

    • @LisaMaryification
      @LisaMaryification 2 года назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you! But I feel like they are looking for some sort of guidance. Perhaps just ask them what THEY think a good next step would be instead of me suggesting something. Or maybe sometimes they just want to vent. Which is perfectly fine.

  • @mokgadi1845
    @mokgadi1845 Год назад +1

    I love this idea and im voting for it.

  • @siddiqueafeera3685
    @siddiqueafeera3685 4 года назад

    Thanks sir,a lot of thanks

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +1

      You are very welcome, Siddique Afeera. It's an honor to be on your team.

  • @sonyacoombes3114
    @sonyacoombes3114 3 года назад +1

    Thank you!!!

  • @wonitahandrew5227
    @wonitahandrew5227 Год назад +1

    Wow, very helpful 👏🏿

  • @jccn1728
    @jccn1728 3 года назад +1

    This was super helpful

  • @jenjim1999
    @jenjim1999 2 года назад +6

    I am struggling so hard with letting go of our son (the last child of 6 to fly the nest). We used to be so close and I went from knowing so many details of his life to knowing barely anything. I am lucky if I get a text 2-3 times a month. This sure isn't easy but I know I have to let go and let him live his life.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +1

      Jennifer R, give him time, they usually come back. Let him know you are there for him.

    • @jenjim1999
      @jenjim1999 2 года назад +2

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV , he knows. It's just hard to be included in his days for 25 years to not hearing much of anything.

  • @StarSurvivor1585
    @StarSurvivor1585 2 года назад +2

    My Son is 19. I raised him w respect and if I set a boundary w him, he just stops talking. Blows me off. He's been w a severely Narcissistic Father since he was 12. He has no communication skills w me when I set a boundary. He just ignores me forever and it hurts. I need advisement. I try to change the dynamic. But when he blows me off I keep trying to communicate. It's not working and I need a new strategy. When I give him space I
    May not hear from him for months. It hurts. I've been a great Mom for the most part. He doesn't treat his Father like this. I get a the anger, resentment, blow back etc. I do feel very codependent. He's my only Son. When he gets like this it feels a complete rejection of my love and care.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +1

      Unicorn Lover, it may be the way you are setting the boundary and he is hearing that you are judging him in some way. Hard to say, take a look at that and if you really need to "set a boundary" or just have a good talk with him.

  • @lll3388
    @lll3388 4 года назад +38

    From a young adult, I’m 21 and I’m treated like Im 15. Feels like my life has been passing me by just doing whatever my dad wants. It’s like I’m dead inside and I no longer know what to do with my life. I have to do Certain things and it feels as if I’m tied down. I’m not ever allowed to travel or do anything without them. I came home late for New Years and I was in deep trouble, should I have been home by 12 as usual on New Years ???? I’m instantly getting the talk. I can’t spend time with my bfs family bc it makes me look bad and I’m a whore for going to his house to have dinner ? Like seriously parents. Please understand your children. Especially if they’re like me, don’t go out, never been to a single party, don’t drink or do drugs. I don’t even have friends. Every time I make one, they always disappear, I can’t ever spent time with them, bc I’m so limited. Please just be careful.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +8

      Vivienne V, unfortunately some parents are over-protective, even to their adult children. I suggest making a plan to become independent and stay focused on that. Thank you for watching. We do have a Positive Personal Development playlist (ruclips.net/p/PLq2mRDkHEBPCYtqYUCuzsyYpAlzKZDVVV) and a Positive Relationship Resources playlist (ruclips.net/p/PLq2mRDkHEBPA410uJ9woXx9B9WiPyM7fX) to help you out in the mean time. Best wishes.

    • @ambern.9887
      @ambern.9887 4 года назад +3

      move out if

    • @jennydeleon24
      @jennydeleon24 4 года назад +12

      I am Asian Mom and I think when you talk to my daughter - she will agree to what you said. I am an overprotective mother and I know I need to learn to let her go and trust that she will make good choices in life. I want her to enjoy her life and be a happy and responsible adult. Thanks for sharing your thoughts - very helpful

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +4

      @@jennydeleon24 You are welcome. I am glad you realize that you need to let your daughter live her life. I don't want her resenting you for not allowing her freedom. Honored to have you at Live On Purpose TV!

    • @solanavtb955
      @solanavtb955 4 года назад +1

      you are like a Pet to them😄🤣

  • @gennylee6459
    @gennylee6459 Год назад +2

    I so needed this. My 19 yr old is always looking at me with an angry face right now.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад

      Check out a few other videos we have about parenting young adults on the playlist.

  • @helicastilho7069
    @helicastilho7069 4 года назад +3

    God bless you abundantly 🙏

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад

      Thank you, same to you Heli Castilho. Honored to have you here.

  • @iolet.9695
    @iolet.9695 2 года назад +1

    Tyx

  • @clwxrf6007
    @clwxrf6007 3 года назад +11

    Thank you for sharing this content. I am a single mother of an 18 yo. She has moved out the house. I realize that I have been controlling and negative at times. I just want her to be safe and make wise decisions. Truth be told I may be co-dependent in our relationship. I text or call her once a day. I am going to try to let go. I tell her I am a phone call away.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      CLWXRF, You are welcome.

    • @angelacooper538
      @angelacooper538 Год назад

      I feel you ! My daughter is 20 and is moving out. I’m so broken and feel depressed. It’s been me and her all her life. I feel like my left arm is gone. I’m so empty and broken ! I really need counseling. I’ve cried for three weeks. Am I going to be ok ?

  • @jacquelinenewman1377
    @jacquelinenewman1377 2 года назад +1

    Thank you

  • @gucci4871
    @gucci4871 3 года назад +1

    Thanks

  • @music.translation
    @music.translation 3 года назад +1

    Love it 😍

  • @nabilakarameh2346
    @nabilakarameh2346 Год назад +3

    I'm gonna try what you just advised
    although I have a feeling it won't work. my son 18 does not even give me a chance to chat with him, he starts shouting with a loud voice, and when I ask him to drop it down, he goes even louder

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад +1

      I generally say when you can talk to me like I am talking to you then we can have a conversation. Doesn't sound like he is interested in the conversation.

  • @MarsellaFyngold
    @MarsellaFyngold 3 года назад +3

    I enjoyed this, I find a lot of parent-child relationship videos low-key make the other party the bad guy depending which view its from.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      Marsella D. Fryngold, honored to be on your team.

  • @msg7455
    @msg7455 3 года назад

    I'm glad I raised my to be accountable from a young age. While communication and understanding were key to their upbringing, so were natural consequences. Today, they are the three H's: Healthy, Happy, Honest

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      Ms G, Congratulations. Thank you for sharing.

  • @gerrimiller3491
    @gerrimiller3491 3 года назад +4

    I'm 44 yrs. old . We surprised our 22yr. old son with a car after college graduation, he moved into a condo and was doing well financially and had a great job for a few years. He moved back home and we sat down that our home is temporary for him and he pays his share because being responsible is top priority as far as managing money and using time wisely. He is basically starting over again as we say to new opportunities and better choices this time. We tell him that it's ok to step back sometimes to access where you need to improve for future endeavors. He says home feels like boot camp since he returned. We say it only makes you stronger mentally to grow and become better.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +2

      Gerri Miller, glad you set the rules before he moved back, makes it much easier. Sounds like he is learning some good lessons.

    • @ambern.9887
      @ambern.9887 3 года назад +1

      I had my son move back home. When I said he had to help and go to work . he went to eork. 3 days a week the taxes and his 2st stimukus and last paycheck came . He didn't get up for work .He seemed to be brooding and waited to be told to help only to negate everything .I finally had to make him move out. He was laying around wasn't planning on college ,was being rigid about helping out . woukdnt walk a block over to find work and wanted to run all night without a phone call..So it was hard but he had to go. Hes almost 21that was last summer.He now has a girlfriend and they have an appartment she works full time hes works 5 hours.. He doesn't call still and unless Im near death or its mothers day I dont hear much . He wants me whenn he wants something thats about it.If I invite him for dinner hell wait till the last minute to back out or offer empty gestures.I digress Its a good thing he feels like home isnt where he wants to dwell forever.

    • @stephensomerville2212
      @stephensomerville2212 Год назад

      I'd be curious to know what your relationship is like with him now that it's been a few years. Providing a home environment that is comparable to boot camp seems a bit extreme.

    • @ny_njtrailrunnert926
      @ny_njtrailrunnert926 10 дней назад

      @@ambern.9887 it sounds like he is very comfortable taking from you without giving you anything to fill your cup. Just like any relationship in your life, it can only thrive when there is mutual respect and effort.

  • @jeremydeane7057
    @jeremydeane7057 Год назад +1

    I liked your message

  • @virginiazamora9058
    @virginiazamora9058 3 года назад +4

    Thank you my child just plays games all day gonna graduate in a month and I pay for everything. Just trying to make him a prosperous adult and I guess I have to let go and let them make their choices

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +3

      Virginia Zamora, ask your child what their plans are to be self-sufficient. Let them know what will be required to stay at your home or they can begin looking for work and a place to stay.

  • @GisellVe
    @GisellVe Год назад +3

    Is there's a video when they're young adult living with parents?

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад +1

      I'm not sure what you mean. We have done videos about failure to launch young adults, check out the playlist.

  • @vbarberful
    @vbarberful 2 года назад +3

    My sons are 17 and 23. Is the parenting Power Up Course something I would benefit from? Or do you have one for when they turn into adults, but still live at home? Thank you. Love your channel!

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад

      The principles are the same. How you apply them would change. You would benefit from things happening at go.liveonpurposecentral.com.

  • @oneluv79
    @oneluv79 3 года назад +2

    What do I do as a parent when I see my 21 year old crashing ... he's taking pills, smoking and I think selling substance. Nobody in my family does that. My daughter is the complete opposite. Why would he take that route, he won't go to counseling or any program that can help him. I cry everyday out of anger, and sadness over his choices. My marriage is now suffering because my husband kicked him out the house, who knows where he is at or what he's doing. He was such a smart boy and all his teachers loved him so much, don't know where I lost my son.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      I don't know why this is happening. It is his choice though and you need to recognize that.

  • @angelaalbano1446
    @angelaalbano1446 4 года назад +1

    My Husband used to tell me that when we first were going out, he told he said Angie anything u need to ask me you can ask me even if u think it may be stuip u can still ask me even if you need to just talk to me about something, even if u need to vent I about something I am here, so I did that over the year and I one thing I learned after 12 years of being with him is that u can't ask him a anything then same man that told me I can ask anything to i can't ask anything to. You can't ask anybody anything

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +1

      Angela Albano, our actions need to back up our words.

  • @masakichi26
    @masakichi26 3 года назад +3

    Hi, I'd really appreciate advice on how to interact and be a good parent to a very young adult who feels they have no purpose in life and they will always be sad. They help around the house, work part time but isolate in their free time, have no friends and don't make any plans for the future.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      ewa norman, sounds like they haven't found anything yet that they are passionate about. Find areas you can explore together that might be interesting to him. Just keep trying.

  • @stickyandsweetie
    @stickyandsweetie 5 месяцев назад +1

    The sweeter I am to him ..the more he takes the beep😢

  • @davidregan9872
    @davidregan9872 3 года назад

    My friend got a girl knocked up when he was only 16! My cousin when he was 17! She ended up a drug addict, but now at 30 plus she is doing good for now!

  • @ge2168
    @ge2168 3 года назад +1

    It's a tough time and my adult son has, like so many, found himself job less, his relationship ended and his house sold. He's back home with me. Not surprising he's unmotivated. I've given him comfort but at what point do I request he helps around the home. He's 30.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +4

      Gloria Malin, before he moved in. Honestly, there needs to be a discussion and he needs to know that he is responsible for himself, you are not the maid.

    • @missmarinette4492
      @missmarinette4492 2 года назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV I'm sorry but what you said is actually kind of ableist. Yes he's responsible for himself. but what you're saying is very rigid and he needs boundaries, NOT an aggressive sentence that says 'you're an adult, take responsibility for your own life' and that's also ageist too. Nobody is perfect and I think what you said is pretty judgemental and harsh.

  • @andyjohnson7566
    @andyjohnson7566 3 года назад +3

    I have two sons 26 and 22 but they have just become unmotivated. they need to take control of their live, but HOW,,,,,

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад

      Andy Johnson, I don't know the specifics. If you want to work with me or one of our coaches, make an appointment at www.drpauljenkins.com/breakthroughcall.

    • @Alphacentauri819
      @Alphacentauri819 3 года назад

      It depends on if it’s in your house, or if they are dependent on you... if not, let them be!
      If they are dependent on you, you need to get very good at expressing your expectations, needs and boundaries.
      You have a right to your boundaries. Spoken in a respectful way to both parties and following through consistently.
      You don’t owe them anything, unless maybe they have disabilities.

  • @jaydog9508
    @jaydog9508 2 года назад +5

    It just sucks watching, helpless, as they throw in your face that they are grown ups and they keep making such obvious mistakes and refuse to listen. So you stop offering advice and watch videos like this, give them space, make yourself available... After my daughter abandoned college to live a life of adventure on the road, she came back to us 2.5 years later, pregnant, abused and penniless.... I love her, but damnit she makes it hard.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +1

      Jay Dog, sounds like you are frustrated. It is tough when the choices they make are not beneficial to them.

  • @tarajohnson5491
    @tarajohnson5491 3 года назад +3

    I’m having issues with an adult daughter. She’s in a relationship with a man who is disrespectful to her. I didn’t raise a door mat, but I’m told to mind my business. She keeps moving back and forth between me and him. It’s driving me crazy!

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад

      Tara Johnson, set some boundaries. You have told her how you feel and now it is up to her to decide. When she is with you, he is not the topic, she can complain elsewhere

    • @Alphacentauri819
      @Alphacentauri819 3 года назад +4

      I have a 23 year old daughter who was making some really poor decisions... I was doing some deep self work and learned different approaches with her. It’s been a tough road, but we’ve both made incredibly changes.
      One thing that has helped enormously, is I approach from a place of deep curiosity , instead of judgment.
      I’ve also learned to be vulnerable & say the things behind what I used to say (the true meaning).
      For example, before, I would tell her what she should be doing, that she could be better and ask “why”, not in a curious way...but in a frustrated condemning way. All that does is fracture a bridge.
      Now, I try to ask, and deeply listen. I try to say how much I care, without any manipulation or attachment to outcomes.
      The Personal Development School (has a you tube channel too) has revolutionized my thinking. I learned I have fearful avoidant attachment style. It helped me make sense of my past relationships, choices I’ve made and more.
      It’s helped me see my daughters behaviors in a whole new light. I can question my narratives better and be more open and compassionate. That feels safer to her, therefore she tells me more.
      I’ve learned about why we are attracted to the people we are...it’s usually subconscious, based on many things.
      If we go to relationships that aren’t good for us, it means our relationship to ourselves is usually not healthy. When we repair that, through healing our core wounds, subconscious programs, we change how we see the world and ourselves, & in turn, who we are attracted to.
      My thinking has been transformed through doing work through Thais Gibson (The Personal Development School). Her RUclips channel is what started me on my current healing path.
      I wish you and your daughter well 💐

  • @TamMoo1977
    @TamMoo1977 Год назад +1

    I left my three children dad nine years ago. Moved from Georgia to Texas. My oldest daughter now lives in Scotland. I missed her prom and graduation. I respect why she is upset at me. Any suggestions to get her back in my life? She was 18 at the time.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад +1

      TamMoo, accept responsibility for your behavior and what happened. Show her how you have changed and what you have learned in life. Ask for permission to be a part of her life and then follow through with whatever you say. Don't promise if you can't deliver. Good luck.

  • @gawmom14herzoo10
    @gawmom14herzoo10 2 года назад +1

    Problem is my oldest going on 19 in August and still in my Home and has no motivation to grow up and be a productive member of this household. Or society for that I have backed off but I see him spinning out of control.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад

      I hope the video is helpful to you. Hang in there.

  • @cherokeejames963
    @cherokeejames963 Год назад +1

    Awesome snack as a Dad

  • @karinae.schofield5605
    @karinae.schofield5605 2 года назад +1

    Um..Yea, this video spared my son's very life..lol..cause I was like..well..you know 😊

  • @ilonamacdonaldsagittarius2173
    @ilonamacdonaldsagittarius2173 5 лет назад +2

    Hello 👋 can you please do the video how to control Stubborn little kids. I have a daughter and she is 6 years old but very stubborn child. I would really appreciate it thank you!😊

    • @VarnasBaltas
      @VarnasBaltas 5 лет назад +2

      There's a lot of helpful videos on the positive parenting playlist, you can check that out! It has helped me a lot with my girls. (6 and 4)

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  5 лет назад +1

      I will add this to the topic list, Ilona Macdonald Sagittarius. Glad to have you at the channel.

    • @ilonamacdonaldsagittarius2173
      @ilonamacdonaldsagittarius2173 5 лет назад +1

      Live On Purpose TV thank you sir!😊

    • @michaelmiller1561
      @michaelmiller1561 4 года назад

      If you are looking for something for your daughter to do check out Tiger Claw Karate Dojo on youtube. Its free

  • @chinhang8953
    @chinhang8953 3 года назад

    Thank you Doctor

  • @fitnessforhealthandhappine1746
    @fitnessforhealthandhappine1746 3 года назад +2

    My homeless daughter returned home yesterday with her homeless boyfriend, they want "help", but will take no advice... I don't want my daughter to be homeless, but I can't support her bad decisions. I bought her a tent and let her live in the backyard, maybe that sounds cruel to some, but what am I doing as a parent if I let them live in a warm house and freeload off me? IF they come to me with a PLAN, and need help executing to get on their feet, that is different, but just existing... I don't know how to motivate someone who has been homeless for over 2 years, they call themselves without a roof, not homeless, because "anywhere is a home where you rest your head, even if it is under the stars". Good grief... I am so confused.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +2

      Fitness For Health And Happiness, see if there are any local programs that can help your daughter get the therapy she needs.

  • @RR-pn6kf
    @RR-pn6kf 4 года назад +9

    Ok but what should I expect from my young adult son! He seems so bothered by presence, like he doesn’t love me at all!.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +11

      J R, I would expect civility and respect. Beyond that, try to find or participate in something you both like so build some commonality. It might be more about him than you.

    • @bridgetmenham6686
      @bridgetmenham6686 3 года назад

      I feel like that too My din is 21 and he s not a giver and he wants ti entertain someone timo night won't tell me who and wants me ti stay somewhere But I have no where to say I'm not in a relationship and civid rules etc and hes been texting me tonight from hes bedroom being cross

  • @denissejuarez2974
    @denissejuarez2974 3 года назад +1

    Could you advice? My daughter is almost 20 we pay for insurance, cell collage, room and food. She is out of a state. But one day a friend's mom call me and said that she was here for 2 weekends and I didn't know that. I feel that at least she can call me and tell me that she was here. I think that she wants all our support with out ask for anything. I try to give space for her. Advice me, please. Thank you

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +2

      Denisse Juarez, let her know what is expected and how she has hurt you. You can decide not to pay for those things and she may appreciate you more.

    • @denissejuarez2974
      @denissejuarez2974 3 года назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you!

  • @danten7774
    @danten7774 Год назад +1

    what if they dont get any of the messaging

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад

      dan ten, you might be surprised with what sinks in.

  • @robertbench5187
    @robertbench5187 3 года назад +5

    I'm already in my 20s but my parents still treats me like a 10 yr old kid! I feel so embarrassed 😣

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      Robert Bench, maybe your could watch the video with them and have a discussion???

    • @onwardsandupwards7397
      @onwardsandupwards7397 3 года назад +1

      Tell them how you want to be treated and stop them in their tracks when they treat you like a child. My daughter has done this successfully with me!

  • @asiatic_lily_kitty4819
    @asiatic_lily_kitty4819 3 года назад +2

    How to send this to my parents without sending it to them

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +1

      Art_ lover, maybe have it playing while they are nearby?

  • @Nima-to3ls
    @Nima-to3ls 4 года назад +1

    👍

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +1

      Thanks, Nina. I gave you a thumb's up, too!

    • @Nima-to3ls
      @Nima-to3ls 4 года назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you!😊

  • @paulcordova1531
    @paulcordova1531 2 года назад +2

    My son is so smart but is also chronically lazy no motivation. Cries when he does job searches. I slave all day but have to come home to this. Being a good parent is a sucker's bet.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад

      Paul Cordova, hang in there. Might need to do some work on himself before he gets there.

    • @user-op6hm9tj5x
      @user-op6hm9tj5x 8 месяцев назад

      “My son is so smart but…” there is no “but” he is smart period.

  • @mms8477
    @mms8477 4 года назад +2

    I am a single parent. I am sure you do not grow up your child to end up in prison and you'll love them no matter what.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  4 года назад +3

      M &Ms, love them no matter what and even if...

  • @cherokeejames963
    @cherokeejames963 Год назад +1

    Thanks aw a Dad I just support them right?

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад

      Yes you do, and love them no matter what and even if...

  • @cherokeejames963
    @cherokeejames963 Год назад +1

    Live on purpose. Ok we dads are to become a counsel for our children. God it

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад +1

      Cherokee, best of luck to you.

    • @cherokeejames963
      @cherokeejames963 Год назад

      @@LiveOnPurposeTV thanks it's along struggle but learning from you helps. The end of the story shall be awesome

  • @swat4hire
    @swat4hire 3 года назад +1

    It looks to me like Vicky's done a great job as clean as that houses behind you! I'm handicapped and 53 my husband 62 and a lawn force man we have to adopt the kids and I have 11 dead natural born children never made it through the prenatal stage so we were happy when my sister-in-law's kids were given to us
    They both still live at home and they are lazy as a person seems to be able To be. It's like they're shakespearean characters it wake up saying to be or not to be every morning in the always choose to be the youngest especially without doing a dam thing for the family or the home which is a hovel
    I'm wondering what kind of then build he would recommend for someone like me that just wants to leave these people since look dad's an enabler and they're lazy? You can say it's me but I'm 53 half blind diabetic and have a broken back to generate disposees arthritis ... Thanks for your advice because I can't get these kids to do dishes hardly ever and can count on 2 hands how many times he had thought one did that but the youngest won't do a thing

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад

      swat4hire, just so you know, I do housework also. See some of the videos on the teen playlist and start controlling what the kids get and what they need to do to earn privileges. You will need to be on the same page with the dad for this to work, but you can change what is happening in the home.

  • @glenhampson1619
    @glenhampson1619 Год назад +1

    That’s great advice, however…what if it’s your daughter, her boyfriend and your granddaughter living in your basement.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  Год назад

      They may need to find another place to live if things are not going smoothly.

  • @lisagee3318
    @lisagee3318 2 года назад +1

    A you buddy it's not going to be any switches respect for you that is not a switch nowhere it was yesterday time doesn't get lost with range and range doesn't get lost with time respect it is not an equation don't blame it on language now I have had the opportunity that wasn't a rock I do not want you to blame it on the word now I haven't built anything you forgot respected as not a builder don't tell nobody it was yesterday makeup whatever yeah that you like it is never time situation respect for others this is not even a language nobody is talkin do you know that parent no blame

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад

      I am not sure I understand your comment. Thank you for watching.

  • @glynnispitcher9423
    @glynnispitcher9423 Год назад +1

    ( REHAB TIME! ) THE RELATIONSHIP WITH HOUR CHILDREN IS MEANT TO TIGGER UNSOLVED WOUNDS AND SUPPRESSED MEMORIES AND FEELINGS FROM HOUR OWN CHILDHOOD SO THA WEE MAY INTEGRATE THOSE FRACTURED ASPECTS OF HOUR BEING AND BECOMB MOOR WHOLE. FACTS OVA FEELINGS!

  • @yan89
    @yan89 2 года назад +1

    my son, an A+ student left home and went to college three years ago and got interested in playing video games in the school's Esports club, so he decided to change his path to become a professional gamer without finishing his academic education. after several discussions with him, we decided to stop providing financial support to him, he has to find a full-time job first if he wants to pursue that path. he eventually found a full-time job but he decided to cut communication with us completely. NOW Dr. Paul. what can I do?

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +1

      Molly, be patient and let him have some experiences in the world. You only control yourself. Hopefully he will figure some things out and you can build a relationship with him as an adult.

  • @natashalapin6423
    @natashalapin6423 Месяц назад

    Yes, they want their freedom, but they think I'm the bank with endless funds :(

  • @abutterfly7975
    @abutterfly7975 Год назад +2

    What you’re not saying is we are their parents for life but we are to stop parenting once they become adults that’s the problem overbearing controlling parents instead of letting their adult children find their way they’re starting their growth and making them incapable of coping in the world by smothering them

  • @bosiljkagajic1356
    @bosiljkagajic1356 3 года назад +1

    Your way of parenting it may work for you and your children but it does not work for the rest of the world you have five fingers and then that same neither of the children I have two of them they’re not even similar to one another more or less the same I am sorry to say sorry but you’re wrong

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  3 года назад +2

      None of my four children are the same. I identify principles and then how we apply them may change child to child.

  • @markdavid9056
    @markdavid9056 2 года назад

    Try open minded, and always stick your nose in to keep them on track and out of danger and trouble, you muppet. You forgot to mention they build through common sense. Not your online money making racket ffs.🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @ingenuity168
    @ingenuity168 2 года назад +1

    Childless people are lucky.

    • @LiveOnPurposeTV
      @LiveOnPurposeTV  2 года назад +3

      I disagree, but that is o.k. Everyone's road is different.

  • @angelacooper538
    @angelacooper538 Год назад +1

    Thank you !!!!! Mom under stress. And brokenness

  • @victorkeller
    @victorkeller Год назад

    Thank you

  • @denadonahue7085
    @denadonahue7085 Год назад +1

    Thanks